TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

no-more-nazis Archive

View 2 posts and 77 comments by no-more-nazis on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
31

Dealing with the Ex / STBXno-more-nazis/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 08:35 AM
15

Custodyno-more-nazis/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 03:18 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
6

It worked once
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/26 04:56 PM
2

Second a regular evening walk. Right at sunset, when it's gorgeous. Very easy habit to establish, everyone feels better. Just seeing her working on it, if you can accomplish that, will make her sexier immediately.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 04:58 AM
5

Same. STBXW and kids evacuated to an undisclosed hotel right before I got the news, to make sure I didn't kill or abduct anyone for the first time ever. Wild. The best explanation I ever got was that because I'd been in the army 15 years ago, anything could happen. I had to demand access to my kids.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/26 06:42 PM
4

I wouldn't even have done that. You have no reason to be in contact with her, right? I heard no mention of kids. Anyway, I don't talk to my kids' grandmother for the same reason.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/26 06:40 PM
1

And don't forget, people telling her what she deserves
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/26 09:17 PM
2

At that point, it's really important to stop caring about what she thinks is fair
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/26 03:40 PM
4

Thanks for the reminder, always working on what's left of the anger- I don't feel particularly angry, though. Not like two years ago. I don't fixate on her, I feel my life is going well. I think this is more of a problem of how to explain my boundaries to my kids when my ex is probably saying to them "wouldn't it be so much nicer if your dad would be friends with me? too bad."
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 03:31 PM
4

My kids are 6 and 5. The furthest they've gotten so far is to say things like "Mommy makes us do x" or the classic "I don't want to go to mommy's house! I want to stay with you!" I can tell they're testing to see if they can reveal something. I just tell them they'll have fun at mommy's house, and someday that'll expand to "I hope and expect your mom has good things to offer you, the same things I saw when I married her". I feel like I can't in good conscience pretend that she's trustworthy. She…
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 01:15 PM
7

That's how I feel. She was supposed to get the kids, and then I was supposed to feel like I have to stay on her good side to see them, or to have her approve of my relationship with them. Now that that plan hasn't worked out, she's doing damage control for a nasty divorce she isn't proud of.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 01:11 PM
3

Absolutely, it would be great to be friends with my kids' mom. Can't trust her at all. Any trust she's given will be abused so she can win. She was supposed to get primary custody and school control. I feel it is terrifying, dangerous, and a bad example to my kids to let it all slide and be friends.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 12:26 PM
6

I haven't figured out that "mature way" yet. I should tell them their mother is the kind of person who uses people ruthlessly? the kind of person who believes it's a dog-eat-dog world, that you just have to get what you can from others? And that they should hope she really loves them? Doesn't seem like a solution.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 08:53 AM
8

Marijuana pretty much stops dreams for a lot of people
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 03:37 AM
2

I agree, it's wrong. Thank goodness it's heading back the right way, I feel the worst for guys who divorced during a couple decades of confluence of "Women belong raising kids" from the right and "Women should get everything" from the far-left. 50/50 is a huge victory for children of divorce everywhere.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 05:15 PM
1

Our situations are incredibly similar, and I sympathize with you deeply. Be wary of putting this on women everywhere, it's one internet-crazy sect of fourth-wave "feminism". It's a real problem, but you will also find in time that there are plenty of women out there who understand this and support you. I know how tempting it is to identify women as the enemy.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 04:44 PM
11

Same story here, she expected the kids to be handed to her. I basically traded assets for that school control- Judge gave her a little more as a consolation. Worth it for every morning I get to walk my daughter to school. 10/10 would again. Good job shutting down the sole custody nonsense. Mine tried everything to get me to agree to it- citing fake science (to which I responded with real science), saying I only wanted the kids for my ego, because what was best for them was being with her and hav…
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 02:52 PM
5

Yes, be optimistic. My ex tried to stonewall mediation insisting that she control the schools for our two kids. I proposed something in the middle. I called her bluff and we went to court. The court, I think, did not appreciate her attitude and gave me full school control, because I repeated (a little bit out of line) in court that I favored a school in the middle. Now she drives the kids to the school two blocks from my house, because the school in the middle closed down.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 02:30 PM
4

I love this comment. I'd like to add, OP, that you should bias against other things you want in a woman for one that makes a lot of money. I dated one who made a few 10s more than I did, and had one kid to my two, and insofar as I pictured a permanent family it was a relief not to feel like the breadwinner vs my marriage
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 05:24 AM
1

I'm not a lawyer, and you should listen to your lawyer by default, but it did occur to me that this could be a nice easy line-item for the bill. 8 photos, $200 each, who knows
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/26 03:43 PM
1

Um, "she deserves to be happy" means she gets to do whatever she wants
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/26 09:15 PM
0

She deserves to be happy
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/26 04:44 PM
5

It doesn't take much Girlboss Divorce Social Media to make "not being a sucker" way more important than being fair.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/26 05:51 PM
3

She was probably told that smart women get this and anyone who doesn't is a sucker
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/26 05:44 PM
5

FWIW, I did the opposite- after decades of dating hot women, married someone I thought had kindness and patience going for her.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/26 11:24 PM
5

My ex and her mom thought it was pretty exciting in the moment too, they were having a blast. Like Downton Abbey power brokering in real life!
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/26 06:03 PM
4

The same happened to me, but I think the idea of keeping people in marriages against their will is a bit crazy. Women who choose to end their marriage for silly reasons should be ashamed and lambasted, but I don't think the government should keep people married against their will.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 04:20 PM
3

There was a notable post here yesterday where the top comment (at least when I looked) was something like "Why are you breaking up your family? Sounds like your wife is trying to work things out, give that a try"
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 04:19 PM
2

I second church. I'm an atheist, so unitarians in my case. Great community, I feel seen and I look forward to seeing my people each Sunday.
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/26 04:20 AM
2

For me it was church. I'm an atheist, so Unitarians. It provides a place where many different kinds of people- men and women, old and young- see you and know who you are. It gives you identity.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/26 02:52 AM
1

It goes beyond that, women are sacred and carry the life force
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/26 03:29 PM
2

This goes especially for the kids. Don't let her decide she's the primary parent.
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/26 11:41 PM
7

"50/50 means no child support" When I ask her what she meant by that she turns around and walks away.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 11:43 PM
1

I'm an atheist, so I went with the Unitarians. Instant network, adults who treasure my kids- highly recommended.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 08:05 PM
1

Church. I'm an atheist, so Unitarians. Instant network.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 08:04 PM
-7

the main divorce sub doesn't seem that bad... what did you say?
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 02:13 PM
5

She's amazing. Still married, so to my ex she's a fool who's internalized patriarchy.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 02:00 PM
5

Same here, Instagram and podcasts and her mother. Wife = slave, divorce = sexy freedom. She also got the idea that our two small children would be better off being with her primarily, and argued it to me as "I've been doing some reading, here's what the science says" My sister-in-law, a psychiatrist, dug up the real science. My ex finally admitted it was a podcast, not science, that told her preschoolers should stay with mom, but she had lied because I would have dismissed it because it came fro…
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 01:56 PM
3

It's not bulletproof, but I think the key is to find a woman who actually wants to grow old with someone, most clearly indicated by her parents still being happily married. My ex's parents are enemies, despite remaining married- and this seems to have been the worst possible case. Her mom encouraged her to get the divorce she always wanted for herself but can't have, due to relying on her husband in her old age health problems. For my ex, divorce was always a part of the plan- it's sexy, "libera…
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 03:13 PM
2

Would you rather have her pretend that she sees you as a legitimate parent, while preparing to sue you by surprise at the first chance?
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/25 09:46 PM
4

I think they're referring to the 50% they have to watch a kid alone- unless you have a spectacular relationship with their mom, you lose a lot of flexibility. I have the same situation with 4yo and 5yo- I had to work late last night and juggle my kids clamoring for my attention at the same time. Thankfully a rare occurrence. It is not the same as being 100% single parent, for sure.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/25 03:26 PM
10

Pay close attention to the parents. As I had parents who respected each other and never fought, it was a blind spot for me. I assumed that just because her parents don't get along doesn't mean she'd follow the same pattern. That may be true in some other case, but as soon as we moved to her hometown her mother made short work of our marriage. It was common wisdom in that family that men are trash to be used and discarded. Also, extreme feminism. I should have seen it as a warning sign when we ar…
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/25 04:10 PM
3

In the words of Donald Trump: "That makes me smart" Blindsiding is a selfish act meant to gain an advantage. More money, more property, more custody.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 07:14 PM
3

I would be very wary of this. My ex and I did not agree about 50/50, and monopolizing doctors appointments was something she pushed hard on. She is likely building a case to take some kind of custody from you in court.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 11:59 AM
15

My self-worth is doing fine, thank you, as the person who officially didn't blow up my kids' life on a whim. I'm sure she feels great about filing, though.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 09:53 PM
4

If you feel profoundly taken advantage of by your ex, you may be very sensitive to any sign of it happening again.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/25 01:26 PM
2

I still don't know about the affair
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/25 03:18 AM
12

The anger about the hotel sleeping thing is so familiar to me. I challenged my ex to keep her vows and she dug up a years-old "forgiven" fight to claim that I had broken my vows first. Some people will always find a way to justify.
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/25 07:53 PM
5

Mine assured me she hadn't married me "for my genes". Well yeah, there was money too
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/25 01:22 PM
5

My ex tried the same- beware of schools in mediation. She tried to get me to agree to let her pick schools and wouldn't move the boundary, because she'd hoped to put the kids in school impractically far away from me. Even though courts designate a school parent rather than a school, I "naively" suggested a school in the middle in court. The judge saw what she was trying to do and gave me full school control!
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/25 06:03 PM
2

Yes, but this happens most often for cases like: coercion lack of disclosure If you do it right, a prenup is very safe. Don't rush it right before the wedding, make sure she has a lawyer too, so no one can claim they didn't know what they were doing signing it.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/25 04:31 PM
3

Not getting married doesn't protect you from child support. Prenups are thrown out for things like coercion and lack of disclosure.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/25 04:15 PM
7

I know I'll get downvoted even though I'm as salty as anyone else here- but with a good prenup, and a good woman who wants to be married, it's reasonable. We all should have had prenups the first time.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/25 04:09 PM
4

Delete such dates from your calendar and try not to notice them any more. When you catch yourself thinking about them, distract yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/25 02:16 PM
3

I wouldn't assume that this dream means you're not over her. Dreams are pretty mysterious, and to me it seems like they are often just our brains intentionally aggravating us. Having felt the feelings, there's a good chance you never have a dream like that about her again.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/25 08:41 PM
7

I know that feeling! My ex assumed the judge would give her school control and refused in mediation to compromise on school boundaries, intending to choose schools impossibly far away from me. It was the only reason we had to go to court. The judge saw exactly what she was doing and gave the schools to me :-D The perfect lesson for her after insisting to me that she was the "real parent" between the two of us. Things are getting better for men, gradually. I was expecting to be screwed- guys goin…
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/25 01:48 PM
3

My ex got into that stuff but it was in partner with her mom, who has was unhappy in her marriage for decades beforehand. Pretty sure while she was at work her mom was curating the perfect sludge of divorce memes for her. I'm told this is a common pattern, in which the mother with no spouse decides to make their child their "spouse". She decided very easily, peversely, that she had to do it "for the kids" (2, 3) without trying to work anything out. Tried to get me to leave town, but now we're 50…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 01:38 PM
4

Why not a prenup? Curious as someone set on a prenup next time.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 04:57 PM
9

My ex cited stats about men leaving women with cancer as part of her justification for leaving me, as if I was inevitably going to leave her 😂
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/25 05:05 PM
4

Yes, go back and meet with them again. That'll be another $800 please.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/25 07:16 PM
8

I encountered one of those "haha men are dumb" memes on my (female) cousin's Facebook yesterday. Surprisingly complicated decision whether and how to respond. It was so seemingly light-hearted, something like "Remember in elementary school when we sent boys to Jupiter to get more stupider? They're back and it worked" Every response I could conceive of to express my disapproval seemed like it would invite further mockery. "What is the joke here? That men are stupid?" ... (Haha you must not get th…
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/25 01:35 PM
2

It sounds like you are looking for logical reasons not to feel lonely, but this is an emotional problem. Getting friends is not an escape from the solution, it is the solution. They don't even have to be particularly wonderful friends. When I was in this situation, abandoned after she asked me to move to her hometown, without connections of my own, I was lucky to have some experience with Unitarian churches from many years before. They're completely compatible with my atheism, and although I'm n…
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/25 02:05 PM
3

I'm only a year or so into post-divorce dating, but now that I'm predominantly dating divorced mothers one reassurance I've identified is that you get the chance to evaluate their behavior during their divorce. Both of the girlfriends I've had played the same role I did in their divorces: trying to work it out and save the family while their partner abandons it. You don't even have to take their word for it or ask for proof; you can look up who filed for divorce online by googling them. It's det…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/25 12:23 PM
7

Hell yeah, that's the only way
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/25 02:08 PM
18

Most of the responses here are from people who were abandoned by a woman and experienced deep grief. We would have done anything to put it back together, felt as though it was the only way to be happy again, then found out eventually that it was an illusion. You may have no idea how wonderful your life can be without her, keep trying and don't go back.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/25 02:04 PM
0

Such as...?
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/25 04:06 PM
11

Don't let your ex avoid accountability by attributing her behavior to "women". SHE did that.
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/25 03:45 PM
3

I already knew this was how my ex decided I was worthless (except for money, of course) yet it's still somehow fascinating to see.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/25 07:23 PM
14

Same here. "Men are trash", not capable of really loving their children. Someone should've told me women who resent their fathers will eventually find this mindset.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/25 03:06 PM
1

I am, but I was smart and lucky. I suggest you try all the other things first before you seek a divorce, especially if you can stay calm and refuse to be the big bad man.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/25 04:59 PM
5

I had those reasons- same two little kids and everything. Didn't leave, tried to salvage it, and eventually she left when it was convenient for her.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/25 04:25 PM
0

Um... do you still owe her money? Like, did you do right by her?
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/25 01:29 PM
12

Your girlfriend's influence on you should be something you like. Mine made me quit smoking.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 05:49 AM
7

I know what you mean. Sometimes I look back at my relatively-tame time in the Army. There's only so stressed a drill sergeant or incoming rockets can make you compared to someone trying to take your kids.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/24 12:39 PM
5

Not just men either, half my friends are old ladies since the local Unitarian congregation rescued me. Kids, any kind of people.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/24 01:58 PM
6

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8160159/ My brother's wife, a psychiatrist, sent this to my ex and I never heard about less than 50/50 again. Before that she was trying to argue it was best for the kids if I stepped away.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/24 05:03 PM
1

That's just fair. I'm in favor, no more pendulum.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/24 03:05 PM
1

Yes, that's what I meant
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 04:03 PM
3

This hit hard. The lack of communication is offensive in cases like this, and for me it was also the pretending to others that she had tried, and that I "shouldn't have been surprised". She will tell our children she had no choice.
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/24 03:47 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter