nothingbutalamp Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
7	Back to square one. Unfortunately its inevitable that your ex has a new partner and introductions will happen. One day you'll do the same when\if you're ready. You are a great dad and you're their dad - the partner is nothing more then a friend to them and could be temporary. Stay positive, it's not a slight at you. People move on. Don't reach out.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/08/24 12:39 PM
3	Is this fair? Depending on where you live it's more "it's the law" and less "let's be fair". Have you spoken to a lawyer or anything?	/r/Divorce_Men	06/06/24 09:19 PM
3	If she was drowning… Well she's still a good mom to our kid so I guess I'd save her.	/r/Divorce_Men	15/02/24 12:40 AM
9	Friends with your ex wife Hard pass. We parallel parent fine and that's about as much as a relationship with my EW as I desire.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/12/23 07:43 PM
22	Reconciliation is foolish, please stop Sounds like my ex-wife.	/r/Divorce_Men	14/12/23 10:53 PM
8	How many of you have had an amicable divorce? Mine is amicable in terms of no lawyers and we agreed on everything. We parallel parent our kid fine. I feel ill when I see my ex wife though but never let on in front of the kid. I wouldn't lose sleep if I never saw her again but she is a good mom. My advice is to not let emotions get the best of you especially if kids are involved.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/12/23 03:50 PM
3	Anger turning into bitterness 2 years post separation\divorce I still get fleeting moments of anger\bitterness\resentment but it doesn't last long - I've spent enough energy being mad. Just have to keep moving forward in a positive way.	/r/Divorce_Men	07/12/23 02:42 PM
10	Whats the first hour after, like? Not being in my home was strange. It was quiet and felt alien. I still get to my place sometimes and think it's just an Airbnb for work. I've been living on my own for 2 years now.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/12/23 05:57 AM
4	Wife just informed me she wants a divorce. "donkey struggling to haul this cart called family" is a great line, I'm going to use that. Good luck sir, you'll get through it.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/03/23 08:08 PM
2	How did you move on post divorce? I couldn't keep harping on things and was tired of being unhappy about it. It was quite a moment of clarity - like a light switch turned on. I did lots of.....self medication and poor choices to try and move on prior which sometimes just made me feel worse. I started to feel like the "old me" and now I feel like I'm in a much better place then 1 year ago.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/01/23 01:48 PM
12	How did you move on post divorce? Time helped me move on. I woke up one day about 8 months after we separated (we are now 1.5 years separated and almost officially divorced) and thought "I am wasting a lot of energy being angry, sad, hurt and what not over someone who doesn't exist anymore." Started a good eating and weight training regiment, dropped 40lbs and now I feel like a million bucks and I'm dating a woman who looks like a million bucks. Life isn't great but definitely much improved.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/01/23 04:36 AM
3	How many of you lovely lot have actually found a genuinely nice and kind woman who makes you happy ? Takes time man - I wouldn't call them unicorns as that makes them seem even more unattainable!	/r/Divorce_Men	28/12/22 03:24 PM
11	How many of you lovely lot have actually found a genuinely nice and kind woman who makes you happy ? I'm seeing an amazing woman right now. Just because I'm divorced, it doesn't mean I've turned into some woman hating incel lol	/r/Divorce_Men	28/12/22 01:24 PM
5	Get citizenship in another country to avoid Alimony and CS? Be there for your kid man, that's the priority. Fleeing a country is cowardly.	/r/Divorce_Men	15/12/22 03:19 PM
7	Anyone thinking of dating a single mom? I'm dating a single mom, hell I'm a single dad. She's a package deal just like I am and understands time management between kids and romantic life. We make it work quite well.	/r/Divorce_Men	13/12/22 02:42 PM
1	Gentlemen; For those you you who are divorced, did your wife ever give you the "I love you, but I'm not in love with you" speech? If yes, did she end up initiating divorce or did you? Oh it's all good, I'm dating a girl way younger than my ex-wife. Super super happy. I am a great catch!	/r/Divorce_Men	28/11/22 04:49 AM
3	Gentlemen; For those you you who are divorced, did your wife ever give you the "I love you, but I'm not in love with you" speech? If yes, did she end up initiating divorce or did you? Haha yah, I also got the "you're a great catch", that pissed me off	/r/Divorce_Men	27/11/22 05:32 AM
1	How do you fill "the void" after divorce? Separated for a year and waiting for the divorce to finalize here (everything is amicable and no lawyers needed). Spent a lot of time with my kid, did some self medication, lost 40lbs, kept my work life successful and making more money then I have before. I'm almost 41 and just started dating a 34 year old woman and I am starting to feel like myself pre-marriage and like a man again.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/10/22 08:18 PM
5	Dating ? Read the Game as a fiction book. The "tactics" those losers used are not applicable these days and will get you laughed out of whatever establishment you're in. It's pre-andrew tate garbage and screams incel to any normal human being.	/r/Divorce_Men	03/10/22 09:32 PM
1	What do you guys do with pictures? I did a complete purge of pictures of the ex, I kept nothing. Aside from my kid I have no proof of being married (i have a tattoo to remove\cover up though). I don't need to reminisce on failure, if the kid is interested when he's older (only a toddler atm) I'm sure his mom has kept some stuff to look at. That chapter is closed, filed and locked away in my memory.	/r/Divorce_Men	02/10/22 09:50 PM
1	Fellas, how long were you single til you got into a relationship again or started dating? I feel like I rushed it because I got into a relationship after being separated. And I feel like it’s affecting the relationship I’m in now cause I never got to heal A year separated and soon finally divorced. I'm starting to get a little bored but I really don't feel like doing the whole dating aspect. Online dating is gross, I signed up for 4 days then nope'd out. I'm hoping something will happen naturally.	/r/Divorce_Men	19/08/22 01:00 PM
1	How do you feel about your STBX or Ex? I think I'll always hold some resentment but I've gone through all the emotions in the OP. Almost a year into our seperation\divorce I'm finding I don't want to waste feelings and thoughts on her anymore. The difficult part is that I still have to see her as we share a kid but I limit my time around her to the absolute bare minimum - drop off and peace the fuck out.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/08/22 08:16 PM
2	Pain, sadness = weights That's awesome, congratulations. I'm going to look into trt. I did just about everything under the sun in my twenties for anabolic steroids and prohormones. The only thing that I would absolutely not touch these days are sarms. Those look worse than prohormones were.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/22 10:59 PM
1	Pain, sadness = weights I did gear in my early to mid 20s and loved it. Now at 40 and getting back into great shape since separation I've thought about it. Just haven't been able to pull the trigger. Maybe next year.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/22 10:04 PM
1	What was the moment you realized it was over? Therapist admitted it, I called her out on it. I was a bit confrontational about it when I had my session.	/r/Divorce_Men	06/05/22 02:25 PM
5	What was the moment you realized it was over? We had a dead bedroom for a good solid year. I came home from work today and said I'm really not happy and didn't feel loved. She agreed and went and saw a therapist. The therapist gave her a chore list for me to do to make things better. When she gave it to me saying if "you can follow this I think things will change" I knew where this was going. I did my best to work with her wishes but it ended up being a one way street. I put in lots of extra time and effort and got stone walled. There were …	/r/Divorce_Men	05/05/22 09:05 PM
3	feeling like crap. Hey man I totally understand. I'm month 8 into seperation on the road to divorce in the fall. I've started to get back into pre-covid shape and have lost 20lbs since leaving. Things get easier on your own once you get a rhythm h going but there are bad days, things that trigger you, or piss you off or you hear something from someone regarding the ex. I unfortunately have to be in touch with mine as we share a little boy with 50/50 custody. I hate seeing her, I hate going to my old home and seein…	/r/Divorce_Men	29/04/22 08:48 PM
2	She shit talks about me to the kids Lead by example and don't say shit back. Keep being positive with your kids.	/r/Divorce_Men	27/04/22 06:53 PM