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oluwawithin Archive

View 4 posts and 32 comments by oluwawithin on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

"How to talk to anyone" by Leil Lowndes.
/r/RedPillWomen01/02/17 11:19 PM
1

Yeah. I did Hot Yoga for a few months. Actually think I got first lower back issue from yoga. But agree its a great compliment to everything else. Just need to get back into it.
/r/askMRP04/01/17 12:36 AM
1

Yes. Only last week I have taken to doing 5 mins on rowing machine, then follow SL empty bar warm ups. Thanks.
/r/askMRP03/01/17 02:20 AM
1

What bothers me? That I am not in a good marriage anymore. That I have let my marriage get to this stage, where wife has owned finances, intimacy, kids discipline the lot. Fucking dickless prick that I have been for so long. Its not her fault though, I am owning this shit and Im gonna sort it. Wish my life looked like? Like it did years back, wherw there was respect and genuine affection. My wife sort me out for direction and advice. But now i want to feel in control of my life, not tip-toeing a…
/r/askMRP29/11/16 02:00 PM
1

Great Advice here. Half way through NMMNG. Lifting , just started but enjoying stronglifts. Reading sidebar and alot of MRP and TFA articles. I agree that i'm not ready for divorce yet, sticking up for myself and kids is definitely the more important step. Appreciate your comments man..
/r/askMRP29/11/16 01:52 PM
1

Yep! Its a painful listen with the 36 or so dislogues (paul says...jane says etc), but less painful than reading them I suspect. I have the kindle book and audible. Love audible can be listening while running etc. Nearly finished rationale male on it now.
/r/askMRP29/11/16 12:59 PM
1

Yeah agree here. Its just being going on for so long, she talks about work and stuff, we are ok when not talking about the marriage (no intimacy). But any disagreement she trys to shutdown with the same words. Its getting ridiculous.
/r/askMRP29/11/16 07:51 AM
1

Thanks /u/midlifedick, this is a good point. Distancing doesn't seem to affect her much, although she will ask where I am going.
/r/askMRP29/11/16 07:48 AM
0

Yeah thanks for encouragement. Actually look foward to the sessions now, next one tommorow morning!
/r/askMRP29/11/16 01:45 AM
1

Yeah agree I shouldn't have said it and stayed where I was, but I decided to leave at least for the reason to write it up here. 100% agree with this, I do understand alot of the sidebar, but internalising and acting on it is harder. I can only keep trying. Read youe post on "get busy" great stuff.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 11:17 PM
1

Yes I have. It takes alot to try and change patterns/habits of 20 years. Thats why I am here to get the feedback I need to get unplugged. I have to say that I feel more empowered about my life and myself over the few weeks of finding MRP and sidebar, than the year or so I have been floundering.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 11:11 PM
1

Thanks, I like the Diplomacy explanation. Got no hidden funds to pay for legal advice yet. All joint accounts etc. Got to work on that, or just let her see the legal fees appear in the account, that may get the hampster running.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 11:08 PM
1

Yeah I agree, just pissing me off she always resorts to divorce word or separation, but never does anything about it. I guess it reminds me of Rollo's article Please, Breakup with Me!. Its just that she should be the one to do it, since she is the one that wants to leave. Understand your comments on butthurt, just trying to understand whether it is better to acknowledge her threats and distance to show her its not acceptable for her to keep making threats, or laugh it off to show that it doesn't…
/r/askMRP28/11/16 11:04 PM
2

Thanks for the comments. I did look at SS briefly, also noticed there is an app for that as well. Most people seem to talk about SL on here, so thought that was the better program to start for a true beginner. Will read the SS book to get better idea on form as well as YouTube videos. The SS is 3x5 reps whereas 5x5 for SL. Lots of comments on the benefits of either on the internet as with everything. Guess best to stick to SL now Ive started. Had a look at fitnotes, looks great, probably start w…
/r/askMRP24/11/16 01:35 PM
1

Thanks, I will see how I go next time round, I suspect I have very weak lower back muscles from years of desk sitting, so will need to take time to build up.
/r/askMRP24/11/16 01:31 PM
1

Thanks for the tip on shoes, never would have occurred to be that they could be a factor being such a noob.
/r/askMRP24/11/16 01:30 PM
1

Thanks. Yes have started with the App. Is it worth paying for the power pack unlock?
/r/askMRP24/11/16 01:29 PM
1

Thanks sound advice. I did use the app the first session so all good there. Actually did a 7km run in the evening as well. Plan to run tommorow night and then Workout B on Saturday. My days are a little but funny due to logisitics, so I am planning Monday, Wednesday and Saturday at moment. Yep been watching quite a few of Alan Thralls videos, awesome. Will see how I go in the normal gym, man reason for joining is it is a chain all over, so I can go to gym at work, when dropping kids somewhere et…
/r/askMRP24/11/16 01:28 PM
1

Yeah it has crossed my mind about affairs etc. It is possible, but she really doesn't seem to get much time to do that, but as others have said before it doesn't take long to meet up with chad if she really wants to. It sounds like all you're doing is procrastinating and delaying the inevitable. Yes you are right here, I am so good at procrastinating, especially in this marriage, and as you highlight it is out of fear, because of low self esteem and having such oneitis for this one woman. 17 yea…
/r/askMRP22/11/16 03:08 PM
1

Yep! If you're shaking your head, imagine whats going on in mine as I gradually realise how much I have fucked up over the last year and a half trying to beg and negotiate desire for me. Largest Face Palm in the history of mankind!
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:55 PM
1

Love this comment! It is quite encouraging and thats something I need, not to save my marriage but to have the confidence to just put me first! Regarding her lack of control and either STFU or AM, I have noticed a number of times when she has started off on one, she may say something to one of the kids that sounds really bad and I'll will just laugh and repeat it, the times I have done this she has suddenly started laughing as well and it diffused the situation. An example was a few weeks ago, s…
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:53 PM
1

I was the same. The problem is that you need your wife's approval to feel ok in your own skin. This allows her to control you with disapproval. Ask yourself why you need her permission to like yourself. Read nmmng and wisnifg as soon as possible. As soon as you can get some male friends. Get your social and acceptance needs met from them, not your wife. All that helped me solve the same problem. Yes. I don't know why I have got to this point over the years as well. What you write above is such a…
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:46 PM
1

Great advice. Haven't been lurking for months, been on these forums for a week. But yes DNGAF is what I need to do. It is a change in behaviour that is very important for me to move forward. I am slowly getting better but it is a very long road ahead for me.
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:42 PM
1

Thanks ReddJive I appreciate your comments here and you are right with my timidity in most things in life! Working on it.
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:39 PM
1

Yeah I have read some of Rollo's stuff, and yes its probably true that I should stop investing time and energy in this relationship. In a lot of ways I am dissatisified with my career as well. I am an IT Contractor and have a long term contract in a government department, it pays very well and has allowed us to support kids in school etc. But I have no interest in it anymore, but I feel I can't leave it because I need to keep supporting my kids. This will be even more so if we divorce, but I don…
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:38 PM
1

^ This. Fully agree on this, I have known for a long time I am the source of most of my problems. But that doesn't make it any easier to change those behaviours. I have looked at alot of things, like Physcho Cybernetics, Tony Robbins Personal Power etc, intellectually I get very excited about this personal development, then I move onto to the next system without much action. This is another reason to come on here and start having to be accountable for my actions and MAP.
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:29 PM
1

Hey. Yeah Skydiving was something I decided to do back in June. It was a comfort zone thing, and in the back of my mind I had the belief, that if I could do that then I could handle the divorce/seperation whatever became of our marriage. I did that skydive on my own, took a day off work and drove up there and fucking did it!!! It was shit crazy when I am hanging off the side of the plane waiting to jump (I was tandem), and then we went and it was fucking amazing. And I felt so good about myself …
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:26 PM
1

Yeah I don't think the full anger phase has hit yet, I am still going through acceptance of this reality. I can see why the anger, as I am already feeling so angry at myself for allowing the situation to become what it is today. I have been stumbling around countless self develop/relationships books since 2015 and alot makes sense, but I never took much actual action with them. I would say things to her like "I would love to discuss some of the things in the books I have been reading", she didnt…
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:21 PM
1

Thanks. This is good advice and something I have read a few times, about staying in the marriage and developing yourself. So use your wife as your sparing partner, and I definitely know as I try to fight out of this blue bill haze she is going to raise some mighty shit storms in protest.
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:15 PM
1

Awesome BPP, I really need this sort of reality check. The more I think about it the more the signs have been there for years about not taking the lead etc. I just don't think I have been able to understand it (coming from a career beta perspective), until I started reading here and reading NMMNG etc. I think that its becoming a more common request from her at the moment, but it is hard to lead as she takes it back immediately. Call me a pussy on this one, but it takes alot to change years of ha…
/r/askMRP22/11/16 02:13 PM
1

Thanks Cholo. Fair enough about the gym, was there on monday and back in tommorrow. Had alot of back/shoulder problems so working on machines for a a week or two. Reading up on Stronglifts, especially form etc. Not sure why I commented about the white british guy, just maybe to highlight the relationship dynamic, but probably of little relevance.
/r/askMRP22/11/16 01:58 PM
1

Hey. Definitely haven't left, just not had time to get back on and respond, at work now. I need the harsh words as well as the advice, so not worried about that. Alot of really good comments and showing me the reality (which i probably already know) of my situation. Ill update this evening. Thanks everyone that has commented so far and please keep them coming!
/r/askMRP22/11/16 04:41 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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