orientedupward Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
2	What's the difference between "toxic masculinity" and "toxic femininity"? Or it's just that there are toxic people? I think truly toxic behavior is rather uniform across sexes. Here I'm talking about Cluster B traits exhibited by narcissists, psychopaths etc, which are prevalent in a small subset of both males and females. This thing called "toxic" masculinity I believe is actually not toxic at all; it's merely men being men and following their natural proclivities. Some people today are at war with men and their instinctual behavior, so of course they label behaviors that they don't like, but which are for t…	/r/PurplePillDebate	07/05/23 02:06 PM
3	“its how we evolved” is a horrible excuse and it needs to stop being an argument "Meanwhile, a 5'9" Mike Tyson absolutely demolished a 6'6" Jose Ribalta, not to mention many really tall guys don't train or lift at all, have a high center of gravity and poor balance, and probably couldn't really protect against a trained, strong man who's shorter than them" I'm a student of both mma and boxing. While it's true that some shorter fighters find successs on occasion, generally speaking the taller dudes seem to have an edge. I don't have stats on the matter, but I've examined the …	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 10:01 PM
2	“its how we evolved” is a horrible excuse and it needs to stop being an argument In general, lessons from evolutionary biology should serve as loose guide posts, not as a basis for rigid dogma. That said, it is simultaneously true that: A.) Every animal species has an observable biological "nature," and since humans are animals, we also have an observable biological nature And B.) Humans, owing to our enlarged frontal cortex and ability to think abstractly, are capable of acting in ways that are counter to said nature at times, to a limited extent. My take: The truth of B do…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 09:36 PM
3	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? Could be. I can definitely identify some signifying behaviors in myself. I'm also an INTP though so it might just be that.	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 03:12 PM
7	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? If your life is more difficult for you because of your autism, I am very sorry. That part sucks. I am not autistic to my knowledge, buy my gf sometimes says she thinks I may be very slightly "on the spectrum." Not sure if that's true or not, but I can relate to some things in life being more difficult due to my being different. However, I do not view difficulty as a fully bad thing. In many cases, my difficulties have been a powerful motivating force.	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 01:58 PM
3	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? Might one not reverse that statement, and say "I only feel autistic, because they are performative (and have so thoroughly normalized performative behavior)?" They are only the "normal" ones because they have a supermajority. No other reason. If most people were autistic, then they'd be the ones with the "disorder." Anyway, don't feel sorry for me. I DO NOT WANT to enjoy it. I like who I am and I much prefer the things I enjoy to the things they enjoy. I could be like them if I wanted to. I have…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 01:53 PM
3	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? I agree that there is very little that is truly right or wrong, objectively speaking. Most observations require a degree of subjectivity/abstract interpretation. But when we aske ourselves "is x behavior performative, or not," there are standards by which we can assess the situation and make a reasonable determination.	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 01:35 PM
9	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? My argument was that that the "normal" level of flirtation and banter is performative. I think this is pretty clearly true, but if you disagree, I guess we just see things differently. But yes, I'm sure the general populace finds me a bit awkward. This is one of the standard by which I measure success in life. I think they are awkward, and often, cringeworthy. If they see me as one of them, it's likely because I act too much like them for my own good. In which case, I disrespect myself. The more…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 01:30 PM
8	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? I have the skill and am perfectly social when I want to be or have to be. I just think it's dumb, and prefer to avoid it in every way that I can afford to. Your argument seems to be an ad populum fallacy. Just because most people act a certain way, and that way is widely accepted as "normal," does not mean that the criticisms of the unparticipating minority are wrong. Yes, it's a skill "for a reason." The reason: to appease other shallow apes. Not a great reason in my view.	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 01:25 PM
3	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? "You're just saying you like to be entertained by women who seem shy." No, I am absolutely not saying that. I said I am attracted to those qualities. I do not need them in my life, or her in my life. I do not need entertainment from her in any manner whatsoever. In point of fact, for my part I find that my periods of being single have been my best moments, and that I was able to entertain myself far better than any relationship has "entertained" me. Also, I never said anything about "shy." Quiet…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 01:13 PM
6	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? "You're going in with expectations too, even if you don't realize it." One, I do not "expect" a woman to have the qualities I described. I said I'm deeply attracted to those qualities, and prefer them. Two, virtually everyone has some level of expectation, or they wouldn't date in the first place. This is an utterly pedantic point. The question is one of how scale. How high of a bar does the person set? My view: men (generally speaking) have much lower standards and are much more open to accepti…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 01:08 PM
4	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? Yes, and he will often "spend time" with a person he doesn't necessarily like spending time with, in order to get it.	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 01:01 PM
9	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? Reciprocal conversation does not mean there's not hidden dynamic where one party holds expectations that the other does not. Yes, a woman will be expected to communicate on a basic level at least. But often, if she's pretty and well-mannered, she won't have to be entertaining, or even very lively in order for the man to want to continue pursuing things. For my part, I'm actually very attracted to a woman who is reserved and seems uninteresting on the surface. The most intelligent, deepest thinki…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 12:54 PM
9	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? We don't tend to voluntarily spend time with people we don't like spending time with. You deeply underestimate the man who hasn't been laid in the past year. Or three.	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 12:48 PM
7	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? Are awkward or spectrum-y and see a normal level of banter and flirtation as a performance I see the normal level of banter and flirtation as a performance. Does that make me awkward or spectrum-y? Does it also make me wrong?	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 12:39 PM
3	Are men always expected to be the entertainers on dates? Or maybe even in relationships? RE: Dates: Depends on how Chad the man is. If he barely makes the cut for a date in the first place, then yeah, he's going to have to be entertaining and all kinds of other things if he hopes to be successful. If he's a famous athlete or movie star, he can basically do whatever tf he wants. He can sit there in silence and eat his food like a slob; the woman likely isn't going anywhere. In the era we are in, odds are she will jump right into bed with him no matter how bad a date he is. Context is…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/05/23 12:23 PM
1	Just pay attention to her "But on offs every now and then arent an issue." Sure, perhaps not, if you're goal is to grovel and/or jump through hoops for sex like the OP. It's an issue for me though. I've got far better shit to do than placate a woman's (or anyone's) emotional neediness. She can visit her sister/mother/aunt/cousin/friend/therapist/the internet/self help aisle for that. How men ever became convinced that we should take on such a responsibility is beyond me. What I do know is that we lower ourselves in doing…	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 06:38 PM
1	Just pay attention to her Who said anything about being "this pissed off" or being "pissy? Strange how some dudes can't grasp the fact that it's possible to calmly tell a woman no, in the manner that an adult would tell a child, without resorting to hysterics.	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 06:34 PM
2	Just pay attention to her "Back when I would let my wife go to bed while I stayed up playing video games, I rarely got any." If you aren't getting any because you're doing your own thing, you chose the wrong woman. Also: to abandon one's own natural proclivities merely for the sake of "getting some" is to disrespect oneself. It's basically like begging for scraps imo. When you overvalued sex, you affix it with a high price tag. Women know this instinctively. They will then barter with so that a few minutes of meaningless…	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 02:34 PM
1	Just pay attention to her Why is it "cool" under any circumstance? Mature adults need to learn to self regulate their emotions. Sorry but if I'm in the middle of something that's important to me, she can wait until I'm done. If that's a problem, she can find the door. Or join a sewing circle. Entertaining someone isn't my job and certainly not my purpose in life. Dropping my own life priorities because someone cant hold their own isnt a game im prepared to play. Imo the number one reason relationships fail is due to one …	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 02:20 PM
1	Just pay attention to her Lol no	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 02:15 PM
7	Women, how would you feel if a man expected you to split rent? How is this even a question in 2023?	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 02:09 PM