TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

outgrabed-momerath Archive

View 0 posts and 129 comments by outgrabed-momerath on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
268

Another common response is men making some bare minimum change for a couple of weeks or months and then go right back to their former behavior. But can't you see they're "trying??" /s Why we don't invest in potential. What you see will be what you get and oftentimes less.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 05:09 PM
7

The crooked dick! Can confirm, it is broken from jerking it all day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 05:31 PM
86

Or, if you are as successful thriving woman (Michelle Obama, RBG, Angela Merkel), you are deemed a harpy. That's what I aspire to though, Powerful Harpy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 05:20 PM
16

Spelling the alphabet out on you with their tongue... Probably originated from Cosmo given how stupid and off base it is
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:59 PM
25

Yes! The last guy I was seeing used that as an excuse and then later described how much she cheated on him...like dude, get tested.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 05:57 PM
7

That mustache! Carey Grant gets me. Such charm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 05:25 PM
105

Two wrongs don't make a right, yet one of those wrongs is a way worse problem and endemic on a large scale. But somehow they are not out here advocating against calling women b*tches...so strange.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 06:20 PM
205

Endless thanks to the mods who save the rest of us from the nonstop crying and squalling of men who have had to see a woman's perspective for once in their life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 03:15 PM
2

I haven't met anyone I didn't get along with although I have met up with people and the connection just completely fizzled out. I think women might be more willing to let that happen (busy schedules, not taking silence personally).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 02:30 PM
107

I was going to write a post about this! Here's where I've met HVW this past year: Meetup.com - look for women only groups. I'm part of a couple that involve fairly nerdy interests, so these women are never talking about men (except occasionally Mr. Darcy). My meetups are virtual at the moment but I look forward to the weekly discussions. Bumble BFF - definitely iffy like you said. I think the trick is to look for women on your level of life (for me, that would be purposefully single ladies), mes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 06:46 PM
14

Try a morning chamomile tea! I have a caffeine intolerance and this has helped with the habit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 01:59 PM
46

This made me think of the difference between the way Harley Quinn dresses on Suicide Squad vs how she dresses in Birds of Paradise! The difference is in color and style being the focus over body parts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 01:57 PM
74

"The difference is in the silhouette and fit." Um, yes women's pants are tighter...? I pretended not to understand so that they would have to spell out the implicit sexism. They ended up getting flustered and abandoning the conversation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 06:33 PM
76

I used to work in an IT department where every guy wore jeans and a button up every day. I wore mostly dresses and skirts. The one day I wore jeans, I was talked to about my "casual wear." Like...look around at the lumberjack status of this office please!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 04:59 PM
50

Regarding the point young girls should just "not have sex" if they don't want to get pregnant: Young girls certainly can choose to have sex. And they should take precautions if they don't want to get pregnant. But...have they been educated on birth control? On the way it fails? On the risk of getting an STI even with condoms? On how to respond when being pressured into not using condoms by men? If "not having sex" is an option as a young girl, I think the educated choice is to not. So maybe it i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 04:16 PM
6

You cannot change him. You cannot make him love you in the way that you deserve and need. You CAN change your situation and give yourself the love that you deserve and need. Don't waste anymore time not loving yourself by letting this guy destroy you bit by bit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 03:57 PM
356

When I don't wear makeup: "Are you feeling alright? You look sick today." Wearing some baggier clothes for comfort: "Are you a lesbian now?" Not shaving my legs: "That's not really my preference for women." (from guys I would never let touch me) Even if I go out feeling fine about myself (without prep), inevitably people are completely comfortable commenting on my appearance because society has told us women are competing in some horrible contest in which they are the judges.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 03:32 PM
127

Sis, it doesn't matter if was paying or not. He was looking when he knew that was against your boundary. And then he lied. If you let go of this boundary, he will never take any of your other boundaries seriously. And he will hide it better and keep lying. He told you so himself. Staying with him will destroy you. Edit to add: I went through this with an ex 3 times. He never actually stopped and I wasted a year of my life. After I blocked him for good, I felt absolute peace and happiness. I woul…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 08:33 PM
29

Just watching porn like it's TV. Nonchalantly viewing the degradation and abuse of women as entertainment. As if there isn't anything wrong with that. Why are men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 07:19 PM
65

Yes, please, I'll bring the flowers and cheese. I'm beginning to think nuns have the right idea...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 01:03 AM
42

Oh but don't forget their jokes about farts! Those are always the pinnacle of humor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 08:25 PM
24

I literally gasped at "sent videos of him gargling his own c*m." Like...I guess I'm just glad he's ending his own line.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 06:34 PM
20

I'll come to your duck farm, if you come visit my sheep farm! Seriously, the dream.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:01 PM
230

"You're going to end up alone with no snake at all!"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 07:43 PM
74

I feel you. I was a late bloomer - I came into my looks in my 20s and was first surprised, then pleased with the amount of attention I got from men. Then, I grew very very tired of it. Every guy says the same thing and none of it has to do with liking me. Looks don't make men care for you or respect you or protect you. Quite the opposite. I used to smile in passing at men, or compliment their shirt, or hold long conversations about their interests. I used to give men hugs when they asked for the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 07:25 PM
67

I don't think it's a communication issue. I think it's how your prospective partner was raised. Does his mom shoulder the emotional and domestic load of his family? Chances are high that will be his expectation for you. My long term partner did a lot of the cooking, had cleaning chores that he always took care of, did car maintenance, planned gifts for our families, provided for us financially, etc. (I also pulled my weight in the relationship, it was equitable). I never once asked him to do the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 06:56 PM
443

"Some of these snakes are really great snakes and it hurts their feelings when you don't trust them."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 06:45 PM
48

This doesn't fit with their narrative that when men sleep around, it should be applauded because it's harder work. The whole "a master key opens many locks" bit. So men have to actively work harder to cheat. Meanwhile, women get dick thrown at them from every angle and somehow manage not to trip onto any of it...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 05:42 PM
37

Gold-digger? No, boi we make our own dough around here. Incel? Literally am propositioned for sex in the grocery store. If we are celibate, it is 100% voluntary because the crusty penis is not worth the squeeze. Bitter? Justifiably angry. Misandrist? Because we won't date you? Because we use the word, "scrote"? You're right, that is the worst oppression a human can face. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 04:15 PM
49

It took me 2 minutes to find these facts: Six women are killed every hour by men around the world, most by men in their own family or their partners. A new report shows that in the UK a woman is killed by a man every three days. Reference: https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2020/11/violence-against-women-femicide-census/ Our "sons, brothers, and partners" are killing us, Davina. But their feelings are more important?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 03:58 PM
21

Seriously. I give a lot to my female friendships, but this left me feeling quite drained.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 05:27 PM
59

Oh noo. I have had a girl friend come into my life recently exactly as you've described. It's been the first time I've had a friend love bomb - gifts, sweet notes, 4 paragraph texts saying I love you every morning. It's very different from my other friendships. She's really into taking pictures of us for social media. She had been talking nonstop about us going on double dates but I've been uninterested, and whaddayouknow, communication has since dropped off...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 03:52 PM
39

Anger is powerful. We need anger right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/21 09:43 PM
11

Love this topic. First off, research has shown it is common for dreams to alter your moods and behavior for up to a day after the dream. So if you are feeling especially defeated today, try to be patient with yourself and I bet you'll feel lighter tomorrow. Secondly, there are many philosophers who believe the dream you is discretely different than the you in waking life. They are separate identities. So, the protagonist of your dream is showing a behavior you don't like, but that does not mean …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 07:32 PM
77

Yah, he says, "I don't want anyone else annoying me." Annoying = asking for the bare minimum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 07:25 PM
106

His speech was, "Maybe there's a roach in there." How could any girl say no? /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 05:25 PM
183

I did some digging and here is his proposal to her: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1_1mOllYOI Big yikes and cringe. He is not worth this girl.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 05:11 PM
125

Right. Just...why? So she can be doubly disappointed? Two times the dry-heaving?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 05:02 PM
343

Why can't they even get negging right? There's no subtlety. It's literally the quickest way to weed them out. Had a guy tell me, "You're kinda pretty for a brunette." Yeah well, you're pretty confident for a limp-noodled, mouth breather.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 04:51 PM
135

It's excruciating to break away from someone that you love. The only thing that can give you strength is if you love yourself more. When you're finally ready to give yourself all the energy you've been pouring into a man (for years), every. single. part. of your life improves. When I left my long term relationship I was terrified of being lonely too, but turns out I was so much less lonely than being with a partner who couldn't give me what I needed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 04:32 PM
28

It only helps them when they spread the message that all men do it. But there are plenty of men who don't. They are begging us not to hold out for those men, because then who's going to settle for their sad, limp penis?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 03:05 PM
20

I remember this. One was a hairbrush, like... are the columnists aliens?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/21 03:13 AM
231

Here's some advice from the book Gift of Fear whose author deals in threat investigation and security - highly recommend, there are many free pdfs of the book online. I just went through this with an ex who has an obsessive love disorder (sends me 100s of messages daily, voicemails, creates new numbers). I understand if you do not feel comfortable blocking him because he might give you a clue to when he is thinking about coming over or other information you want to be aware of. That I believe is…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 07:57 PM
174

Very much same. They like to say we live in an echo chamber, but I read men focused threads and take the words from their own mouths. We're not regurgitating information back and forth to each other, we're pulling information from online platforms like Twitter and Reddit, scientific research, and life anecdotes from over 130,00 women. They are laying out their manipulation games, like you illustrated above, as if only men can read it. Wake up, dudes, we're educated now! And with males dropping o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 07:47 PM
404

Men so clearly state what they want from women online. Which is a change from the past when they shrouded their intentions with accepted social convention. How many of us have experienced nuanced misogyny out in the real world and not said a thing because maybe we misinterpreted their intentions? Anonymity has allowed them to out right say, "Women are good for sucking dick. Women are good for dealing with my emotions. Women are good to give you children and raise them." (There was a whole reddit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 07:10 PM
34

*worth 1000 times more than my dusty sack fixed it for him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 06:09 PM
113

You'll notice these men touting arguments of why their misogyny is justified never have a biology (or any science) degree. Biologists know that human beings are a complicated amalgamation of DNA, cells, and biochemistry influenced by developmental stages and environment. It is erroneous to say evolution even implies genetic determinism. Our understanding of evolutionary biology is constantly evolving (heh) because we find new evidence with better tools, methodology, and sites of human past. For …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 05:49 PM
38

Virgins or robots. "Simply input touch and output sex!"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 12:59 AM
9

Maybe try celebrating it. If you don't like it, you know you're not missing out and don't have to think about it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 12:56 AM
28

I think she did address that it wouldn't be a problem if men stepped up to the plate...I think it's valid insight we can't just ignore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 08:45 PM
25

Major kudos to you for listening and growing! You're a good mom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 08:43 PM
14

Let me also add*,* you may even get to the point where you don't ask about it or don't follow him so that you don't have to see it. Basically allowing yourself to accept it. And then you live out your days with a nasty pit in your stomach, feeling sick at the sight of the IG icon. Your mental health declines and you start thinking about trying to be thinner or building a better booty, or using filters just to compete with a fictional image. It's a sad future. (Been there, done that.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 08:02 PM
213

Moms are expected to love their boys unconditionally. "Boys will be boys," and any behavior that falls under 'boy behavior' is acceptable. I have encountered many a guy that has been shocked to find out my love is very much conditional. And my conditions do not include allowances for boy behavior: tantrums, selfishness, laziness, uncleanliness, aggression, you know the drill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 07:56 PM
28

Here is the long game of this guy (because I have experience): -He follows one thousand insta ladies (I have trouble with the word thots) -He sends them little messages like, "So hot." or "OMG, I would do anything to be there." or whatever inane BS that passes for a pickup line these days. He deletes these messages. -If they respond, he escalates, trying to form some kind of connection. "Oh you seem like a really cool girl. I'd like to keep getting to know you." Sometimes, he starts paying for t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 07:39 PM
16

Guaranteed he is actively sending flame emojis in hopes any of those girls would drop their panties for a little attention. And I do mean little.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 07:29 PM
18

Yes yes yes. They want a gorgeous, horribly insecure woman because she won't realize she can do better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 06:12 PM
253

He was really hoping she couldn't do the math on that one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 10:52 PM
42

Seriously. Women fear being killed by men. Men fear not getting their boner wet. They really see the latter as more important.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 10:06 PM
165

At what point do porn users get tired of their penis not functioning? If my vagina suddenly closed up, I would be real concerned. But they just double down and convince everyone around them, that it is a-okay that their lil jimmy can't stand on its own anymore. Completely natural.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 08:45 PM
73

"WHY are these women not rushing to my house to open their legs for me? WHO told them I wouldn't listen to anything that comes out of their mouths, including the word no? Who are these women who have the sense to not trust me? I'm not saying abuse doesn't happen, because I frequently abuse women. I'm not saying sexual violence doesn't happen, but when do I get the chance to be the perpetrator? This climate of fear is not very good for me, an absolutely unattractive garbage troll, to receive the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 08:34 PM
195

Shame exists for a reason. Bring shame back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 08:25 PM
14

Hate it. I had an ex who, after I told him he scared me with his anger, told me, "Don't text me about this anymore until you've calmed down." I gave him what he wanted and never spoke to him again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 08:14 PM
13

They use someone else (a third person - often a female) to manipulate your behavior. Women have been conditioned to be intra competitive, so it's unfortunately effective. I.E. "You're nothing like my last crazy ex!" Pressure to be the cool, sane girlfriend who never complains or has emotional responses. Or "Penelope has such a cool style going. I wish you would take more chances with your clothing." Comparing you to another girl to make you insecure and easier to control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 08:03 PM
45

People boil down to their actions and words. That's all we can ever really know about each other. Especially unprompted thoughts and actions! If they're saying it, trust that that is what they believe. If they're doing it, that is who they are. Periodt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 07:56 PM
21

Isn't it just a wild coincidence that all the people her boyfriend wants to please are attractive naked ex girlfriends?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 07:41 PM
5

100 percent. I think most of us would not choose to contract herpes and would not choose partners that would give it to us. But that's the thing about FWB men, they have no incentive to protect you from things that would hurt you when it comes to sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 06:40 PM
4

We have to be the models for other women. You can't tell someone else what to do, but you can demonstrate it and hope they see the happiness and strength that comes from independence. How many of us have more than one female role model actively in our lives? I know a lot of us advocate for cutting out pickmeishas, but is there a way to live our lives openly that can influence other women positively?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 06:04 PM
4

Anyway...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 05:46 PM
17

I will just add the caveat that we don't have complete control, which is why we fight for rights to abortion in many places.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 05:42 PM
67

My sister's boyfriend once asked my dad around the campfire if he had any horror stories...about his time deployed in Iraq. There is no empathy switch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 05:19 PM
17

I always think of my former roommate who had many FWBs because her needs were 'highly physical and sexual.' She has no idea who gave her herpes* (she did at least use condoms, but...). And believe me when I say none of them stuck around to comfort her when she discovered this. Was it worth getting her needs met? No one can say but her. Sex has the high probability to change our lives, and not for the better. I personally believe safety should be a bigger need than sex. \Herpes is also extremely …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 05:13 PM
30

Good insights here. Even if you build a man up to what you want, you never get to stop putting in that work. He's like a wind up toy, the minute you stop winding, he goes limp again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 04:45 PM
23

It's so messed up that the rule is now: It can't be abuse if his dick is hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/21 03:18 PM
9

He will never 'let her go'. Why would he let a free maid go? You're right, the onus is on her to clean and it will be on her to leave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/21 04:56 PM
21

Thank you for writing this all out. Sending so much love to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/21 04:58 AM
4

What the what...girl you must be going through it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/21 04:38 AM
29

I'm so sorry you have been through that. Just know, it is very normal to experience heightened emotions on anniversaries of the day something very damaging happened to you. It is a symptom of PTSD and a lot of us don't even realize it's happening. Memories of trauma contain information about the danger that the event involved. The memory helps us be aware of when we should be afraid, how we should look at such situations, how to feel in that situation, and what to think. The trauma memory gives …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 07:12 PM
5

I think you're very right. We each have events that have traumatized us that maybe wouldn't have traumatized other people. And sometimes things happen to us that other people feel should be traumatizing but we don't feel that way. Nobody can tell another person how to feel about those things. Also, I'm sorry that any of those things have ever happened to you and grateful that you bring so much empathy to the discussion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 06:37 PM
54

I do agree with this. At the same time, I wasn't taught a lot of life skills that I've managed to learn through picking up a book or watching a video to tutorial.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 06:28 PM
27

I sincerely hope you have blocked him on everything. Any little snippet of words he can get to you will continue to wreak hell on your mental health unless you do. You do not start healing until you stop communicating with him. I only say this because it sounds like you may still be hearing from him? He will only bring you pain with his words, whether they contain love or hate. Sending love and hugs and peace to you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 06:22 PM
45

The Gut is powerhouse of the woman. I used to mistake my gut feelings for *butterflies*. Now I know that was just anxiety masquerading as excitement because I had my rose colored glasses on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 05:48 PM
167

This applies too if you saw the red flags, knew they were red flags, and continued on because you thought that was what you deserved and all you could get. That's not who you are anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 05:03 PM
18

Right? It's not bad advice. It's just entirely weird reasoning to do all of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 10:03 PM
263

Watching men complain about their systematic woes created by the patriarchy is just too ridiculous. I guess I'm sorry the men in control of everything created something as shitty for you as it is for everyone else? Perhaps develop some empathy and try to make a positive change? No? Ok, enjoy the wallowing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 08:26 PM
52

Absolutely thorough job, kudos! I would only add to Boundaries: No lovebombing (no moving too fast, no deciding this is your soul mate, no excessive 'love' without foundation). You have brilliantly thought through all of the negative things you won't allow, so just be mindful of the things that feel positive that can trick your mind into putting up with ish down the road.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 06:29 PM
28

There used to be an app called Lulu where you could rate your date. I believe it was sold a few years ago though and became just another dating app. There is a more current app called Do I Date that you can leave reviews of matches. I'm not dating though, so no idea if it's useful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 06:18 PM
62

When you dig out the weeds of your garden, at first it is empty, but then you suddenly have room for astoundingly beautiful things to grow. So happy for you, sis!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 06:09 PM
97

My favorite thing to say to a man who wants to do things to me is, "Anything I allow, I get to do right back to you." Damn, do they turn pale.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 06:03 PM
24

"Trust me." I think I won't, thanks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 05:36 PM
46

100 percent. We are not fountains of unconditional love. I had a guy friend "open up" that he had been lying to his wife about being unemployed for 6 months, spent most of his days gaming, and had spent their kid's confirmation money on a PS5. First off, I did not ask for that confession. Secondly... just WTF I'm not equipped for a compassionate response to that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 05:32 PM
37

Yessssss. Friendships are work. I wake up and try to remember the important things going on in my friends' lives: birthdays, promotions, breakups, etc and then I reach out or send thoughtful gifts or plan an activity for us. And they reciprocate. There is nothing in those actions that is specific to my female gender!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 05:21 PM
80

That thread is so interesting because the two comments I read that were constantly repeated were: "I once opened up emotionally to a girl and she didn't respond so I will never ever again do that." and "Something bad happened to me and I couldn't tell any of my guy friends because they would tell me to man up." Like...guys won't open up to their friends and when they expect the ladies in their life to shoulder all of their emotional baggage (which, omg some examples of them *opening up* are actu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 05:02 PM
83

It's crazy because when you get to know someone, you pick up on what upsets them. People literally will tell you upfront what they dislike or what scares them or things in their past that have hurt them. So, "I didn't mean to upset you," basically boils down to, "I knew this might upset you, and I couldn't care enough about you to change my behavior."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 04:52 PM
49

Jon Birger was just on a podcast I was listening to. His premise there was that meeting online does not lend context to a relationship. He also advocates for women to approach men and propose though. What I found really fascinating is his work on gender ratios. He found that gender ratios really influence how men treat women: a high ratio of women to men = treating women as disposable, while a high ratio of men to women = being protective of women and more monogamous relationships. Online dating…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 02:32 PM
78

My HVM husband did not watch porn (he is now my ex but our separation was based on me figuring out I did not want to have children). I actually used to be a porn watcher and he never felt comfortable with watching it with me. If I was gone for a long period of time, he would maybe watch a sexy scene from like Spartacus to masturbate. He never had interest in social media or ogling women for their bodies. I honestly was super suspicious about it for a long time, but I was just used to the "porn n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/21 04:34 PM
121

This is incredibly eye opening. It seems like men's perception is so skewed from reality. A list of other things men erroneously think - all evidence from research: -women talk too much (men are shown to take up more conversational space but perceive that women do) -they are more attractive than they are (they consistently rate themselves higher than women do) -they are more qualified for jobs than they actually are (they'll apply for jobs when they only meet 30% of requirements) -they have athl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 06:23 PM
26

This works in so many scenarios. Anytime a guilt trip is laid at your feet by a guy, let them go on it...alone. For instance, he says "I guess I'm the worst person in the world for forgetting your birthday. cries." Do not reassure him. Instead you say, "Yep, I guess." He says, "I guess you never cared about me at all. Maybe we should take some space." You, "You're right. Let's do." No more coddling, give them what they ask for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 05:02 PM
8

I just read her book, "Whent Things Fall Apart"! Really love her perspective and helped me feel a lot calmer about facing failure in relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 09:21 PM
3

Some tips I read ( I can't remember where) to help support a friend/relative in an abusive relationship: -don't blame them or say things like, "Well that's what you get." -when responding to a story, clarify their experience and give perspective, "I wouldn't like if someone was treating me that way, I would feel disrespected." -sometimes people don't care enough about themselves to get out, but care enough about their kids or others being affected, so say, "What is going to happen to your kids' …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 04:56 PM
16

My car died last week and my friend brought her boyfriend around to help. He didn't have jumper cables (I did) and was "too afraid to touch anything electric" (??). So he watched me while giving incorrect advice on how to jump my car. He gave himself a nice pat on the back when I got it started.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/21 05:41 PM
14

You're instincts are spot on. It's a subtle (and annoying) form of hoovering. He wants to know that he can still get your attention, it boosts his ego and gives him fuel without having to do much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/21 04:53 PM
29

Oh my gosh, it's so painful to have a crappy dude prioritized over a friendship. I have a friend who I will not reach out to unless by some miracle she stops putting her own safety below whatever value she gets from random Tinder guys. I still send out loving energy to her from afar but no contact is better for my sanity and soul rn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/21 04:43 PM
89

What I like in men is a pair of strong arms and a deep voice. And if I could put those on a sweet tempered robot without feeling like a creepster, I would.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 11:31 PM
16

Can you even imagine saying "Hey you need to put a smile on your face," to a man? No, because you have the grace and sensitivity to understand people are going thru some ish and don't need the added pressure of looking a certain way while doing it. I'm sorry you had to deal with that and I'm cackling at your responses!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 11:23 PM
21

That's great that he thought to bring something extra. But he brought wine when you're both trying not to drink? Sorry not trying to nitpick, this just stuck out to me. (I once had a guy bring me a full cocktail mix set as a house warming present and I fell off the wagon, which was his goal.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 08:16 PM
30

I'm a huge sucker for words unfortunately. I think we're primed to be. I think of the times we're told to communicate, the moments we watch in movies as the guy lays out how much he loves the girl and is sorry for all his actions that say otherwise, the pressure to accept apologies because "They said they're sorry, what else do you want!" I wish I was taught to take words with every grain of salt available. I'm still learning (and unlearning).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 06:50 PM
106

Apologies are easy. Sure, some people struggle saying they're sorry, but objectively there is literally no work to it. Actually changing your actions and behavior is deceptively hard. Keeping up an internal change longterm on your own impetus is the subject of books, groups, classes, and whole organizations. Most people just stop at the apology. That's the amount of work they're willing to do for you: saying a few (or many) words. Ask yourself, is that enough?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 06:24 PM
1

"Chad, cock carousel, hitting the wall, etc." are all Redpill phrases he's just repeated mindlessly, so I understand the rhetoric, but...why da fuq would that be your dating bio? I'm giggling so hard because only other Redpill men would respond to this. This dweeb would have better luck on Grindr.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 05:09 PM
12

If they have to tell you they're a human without any prompting (my ex did too)...they are trying to convince you because inside they feel very inhuman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 03:17 PM
48

Solidarity is the perfect description. Everyone has some sort of insight to offer and it's received with genuine reflection and consideration. Commentary and critique is delivered kindly but firmly. So many different backgrounds and perspectives here, and yet everyone manages to be respectful. I wish we could bring this energy and unity into the physical world. I'd love to see real world gatherings where we could have discussions, jokes, and simply find joy in each other's company as we do here.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 03:27 AM
21

"Quick! Remove her clit before she feels sexual desire. That's reserved for the men, thanks." Awful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 04:26 PM
10

I would really love for him to elaborate on what equal 'support' looks like to him. JK, it would only make me puke in my mouth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 04:02 PM
10

A much creepier Collin Robinson.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 04:00 PM
29

Completely agree with your point about there's always a hurdle. Also, if he's not staying on the timeline then that's his problem to deal with as you walk away, because trying to push him will just drain you of your conviction and goal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 03:27 PM
83

I want to adopt as well. Found out my ex-husband did not want to when he would never set a timeline. It was always, "We'll think about it in another year or so." That's my advice to you, he has to be willing to commit to actively trying to adopt on a timeline (like 'spring 2023 or something) and purposefully participating in the process, not just just agreeing to what you say. Otherwise, big chance he's not actually interested in adoption.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 03:19 PM
54

There's some sort of mental incapacity there! Mine went back and forth from, "I'm a piece of shit, monster," to "I didn't really do anything wrong tho..." Which is it, buddy? Nvm, can't be bothered to care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 09:16 PM
304

Can anyone tell me why men do this? Why aren't they embarrassed by doing this kind of theatrics? When I caught my ex, he sobbed and pretended to throw-up for a full hour. Making the most horrific cat yakking sounds in the bathroom while I tried to smother my laughter at how ridiculous it all was.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 07:31 PM
31

Oh god, girl you went through it! I hope you have nothing but peace in your life now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 03:50 PM
29

'Being friends' is also a great way for a guy to string many girls along without commitment: When you want to know what you two are? "We're best friends and more..." When you want to know what she is? "She's just my friend (who I hope to have sex with)." When you break up? "Let's still be friends! (who have sex)"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 03:25 PM
110

Perfectly said. Adding to this because I've seen it on a few posts as well: your appearance does not dictate whether he behaves as an HVM towards you. He treated you, a brunette with glasses poorly, but a blonde with tattoos like a princess? Not likely. That shows that he values women based on a fragile concept of aesthetic. And boy, I pity the woman that that man chooses if a crack appears in her surface. He's not a better man because he's with a different woman, he's the same guy biding his ti…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 03:34 AM
115

"What's up class of 1995?? Your boi just got a girl to agree to a video chat! I will now be accepting hi fives."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 08:15 PM
30

Oh girl, I feel you. I used to attract shitty men who became obsessed with me, and I looked on it as a compliment to myself. Now that I've stopped interacting with most men, I've come to realize that I was participating in some really unhealthy dynamics to get validation. Recently I read this quote, "Men who cannot let go, choose women who cannot say no," and boy that hit like a bag a bricks. All that to say is: you're going to keep having light bulbs go off and learning about yourself. Some of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 06:36 PM
19

It's so easy to get lost in our partners and let them take the wheel of our lives. Going forward, do you have some concrete moves to reignite your fire? Hobbies, friends, interests, career moves, skills to pursue?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 05:34 PM
32

That predator stare is often a sign you're dealing with a narcissist. The eyes are the windows to the soul and when they're dead, well...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 05:26 PM
5

Was the salmon dinner going to be your first date? At his place I'm assuming? Eeeeeehhhh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 02:57 PM
5

Absolutely you made the right call. My junior year I went with a bunch of friends and I had absolutely the best time. Senior year, I went with my boyfriend who refused to dance, was confused and upset about 'how many friends I had' (different schools), and later ghosted me. And that was a boy I liked. Imagine the experience with someone you don't even know. I'm sorry your proms were/are canceled and I hope that you will soon have opportunity to celebrate with your friends, although it may be in …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:13 PM
23

These commenters are the same people who would tell a guy he's right to breakup with a girl (and shame them) for having a wild period of sex or ever being a sex worker. But a dude's sexual history is "none of her business"?? Hypocritical to the max.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 04:32 PM
4

I feel you. I've had some really hard friendship breaks lately (during a pandemic no less). I have some not crazy deal breakers like: don't put me in a dangerous situation with a dude you just met and don't try to makeout with me when you're married (or at all). Luckily, I am also really strengthening my relationships with smart, talented, independent friends and opening room for new ladies. I've met a bunch through my hobby clubs - book club, climbing, music. Making friends has become surprisin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 03:35 AM
2

Oh wow. You're timing on this is impeccable. I broke up with this dude after discovering his cheating IG activity and the voicemails he was leaving me were of him sobbing, begging for another chance (he already had one). As an empathetic person, I assumed his tears were coming from real dismay and I felt terrible - and guilty even! BUT one thing I've been learning the hard way is to not assume your own perspective is also the perspective of the LVM. And one way to tell is the way he reacts when …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/21 10:12 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter