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View 1 post and 22 comments by palikapalikapalika on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
6

palikapalikapalika/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 10:50 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

If he informs her beforehand that he will record everything, it that still illegal? Or do they have to give consent? No idea, genuinely curious.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/22 02:21 PM
3

She gave you feedback. in our country we have a saying that "examples go criple" , meaning: you can always find arguments to contest the example, but that's not what the example is about. She is trying - possibly in an imperfect way - to explain a general line she experiences. It does not make sense to torpedo every single example, it is about the general line she is trying to picture. Look into that, with honesty. Could she have a point? For example, do you really, always have to fight her dad …
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/22 02:17 PM
5

I am really sorry you go thru this. The waya you describe it though, also seems to suggest things have long not been well between the two of you. And she does not want to work on things. That's tough to take, especially if you are willing and trying to put in the work (I am in that boat, I can assure you and it sucks double). I don't have any advice, I'm afraid. I am a sucker for second chances, therapy and trying it all. But it seems you have been going that road for a while already. So if it's…
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/22 01:30 PM
3

Wow, these are inspiring accounts, for us at the beginning of this painful journey. Thank you for sharing. The interesting part is, that in the long run, the wife doesn'n like us to give up on our passions. In my case, this turned out to be one of her reproaches. And, in a way, I guess I'd have to agree, although I also disocverd that being a dad and being at home a lot is another passion of mine. I enjoy it tremendously. But one thing (being an available partner and dad) should not exclude the …
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 10:47 AM
1

Well, but apparently it is not clear to either of you what exactly needs to be done and when, for the other to be happy and not feel like the stage director of the house. And yes, it is quite probable that you don't see everything that needs to be done, or how frequently (mowing the grass every fortnight is not the same as thinking of the groceries every day), and yes, she will also have to compromise on your wishes. But really, get an outsider to help on this, if only one of those books that co…
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/22 08:35 AM
1

sorry to hear that, as you seem to have worked on it!
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/22 07:05 PM
2

I don't think gaming yes or no is necessarily related to growing up. There is nothing inherently bad or immature at having a hobby. Besides, there is grown up women doing / enjoying things that we men think are really immature. Other than that, you are totally right! How is a computer game more important than your partner? By the way, how is it more important than other great things you could do in life? Again - I am not saying one should not game. But one should not limit one's life to gaming a…
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/22 01:45 PM
2

2 nights a week for 4 hours, plus on your Friday, plus on her weekend overtime? I don't know man, that sounds like a lot of time gaming! Are you really being honest with yourself when you say "I play for a while"? Like, really honest? Is gaming worth losing a marraige over? I think she should cool down on her hate for your gaming, but it is also very likely that you do not do your share of the household. And no, the argument "she doesn't tell me what to do" doesn't hold: you are a grown up, you …
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/22 09:32 AM
2

this! Is this worth losing a marraige over? I think she should cool down on her hate for your gaming, but it is also very likely that you do not do your share of the household. And no, the argument "she doesn't tell me what to do" doesn't hold: you are a grown up, you know what is needed around the house. Grow up! (i'm a man, by the way.) If you can't come to a reasonable division and proper planning of tasks (and game time), then get counceling. (Planning is important: you do the chore because …
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/22 09:24 AM
1

let us know what you are deciding / your thought process!
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/22 09:37 AM
2

Why would you want to be in the company of the new boyfriend at all ? it would spoil my day.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/22 06:09 PM
3

I am in te middle here. Reading the title, I would really wonder why you would want to go back. However, you still have feelings, she claims to have feelings for you, she claims she has changed. meanwhile you still need to work on yourself - as others rightly point out. And people do change, as yet other people are pointing out in this thread. I firmly believe this, as I myself have changed. We always have the option to grow in life. By the way: note that everybody who claims "people don't chang…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/22 12:05 PM
1

"the one in power" - that sounds really weird. So a partner can just take a child away from the other parent? That's incredible.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/22 08:13 AM
1

Wait .... is this not litterally a case of abduction / kidnapping? You are the father, you are not divorced yet, so you have full custody, right? So how can she legally take and keep your child away from you ?
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 09:44 PM
1

I wish my STBXW would read all this advice! She is planning to introduce her new "beau" coming Sunday. (Without informing me - my son mentioned it casually, thikning I had been informed). We have sort of half-heartedly seperated six months ago, when she dropped the bomb and started this relationship, we're birdnesting now, and we have not even started the divorce proceedings yet. A year sounds good to me, but even if it's six months counting from neatly finalising the divorce and organising the …
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 09:30 PM
1

And why would you not want to see a good therapist? (besides all the other things that you will need to do to turn your life around). Basically you are deeply unhappy, possibly depressed (high functioning depression or PDD), socially isolated, profoundly disappointed in life, with fundamental questions about (the meaning of) life. Sounds to me that you would benefit from any help - both "friends, family" kind of help as well as professional help. So my question, without sarcasm, why is that the …
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 09:16 PM
1

fair enough - an avalanche of options and arguments may not be the best way to enter a discussion. And I agree: sex is very important for most people. And it would be helpful to try and find out the cause of that lack, before looking to find it somewhere else, I'd think.
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/22 09:01 AM
1

the point is, that - in many cases, I don't say always - the talk should not be about the lack of sex ("I want / need more of it"), but about the underlying cause for the lack of sex. The extreme example being, for example, (sexual) trauma, but the much more common reason is stress, work load, not feeling heard, lack of caring, a very uneven household workload, not enough me-time / time to relax, a lack of intimicy that's not directed at sex, etc. In other words: often the real problem is somewh…
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/22 11:58 AM
1

That is just a cause for a poor decision, not a reason / excuse. What OP should have done is address the issue of a lack of sex in their marriage, way earlier. There is a reason there was not interest in sex anymore (physical, emotional or romantically or a combination of things). That reason should be uncovered and addressed. That is probably the real reason she wants a divorce. In a way, he created the situation for her to muster up the courage to go for it. In response to OPs question: I don'…
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/22 05:11 PM
1

9 months and toxic and in counseling? Regardless of the ex, where do you see the two of you going? Or, put differently: you and her can not be together because of fighting and toxicity, while she is on good enough terms with her ex (her ex, for crying out loud, who is her ex for a reason) to share the same house for a few weeks ? I am a sucker for trying to make things work, but even to me this doesn't seem to make sense.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/22 05:02 PM
2

I really don't get it. There is very negative, toxic advise over here. Why should we assume his current partner is already planning to cheat and/or leave him? As if every woman is the same as some other women that men in this sub have apparently had the bad luck to be involved with? Why could he not have a regular, normal relationship, where he encounters a certain anxiety, due to past experiences? And in a normal relationship I would say you can talk about this. Explain about this issue, that i…
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/22 04:54 PM
1

I don't get it. You say you are on a sinking ship, but the way you describe it, the ship has already sunk? What I mean, if it is still in the process and you are both level-headed, it there no way to at least try and make it work? Get professional help involved, work on yourself - the two of you. You have liked / loved each other for 10 - 13 years, you have a wonderful daughter ... isn't that worth a try? Doesn't your daughter deserve that? you both wanted her, right? Why give up on her? I don't…
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/22 04:42 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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