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patience9 Archive

View 0 posts and 14 comments by patience9 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Maybe just talk to him about why he is doing it. Like what does he find attractive about these women? I don't understand how this will benefit OP. What's he going to say, "well, I like your friend Becky's butt and my friend Ashley's breasts, and I wanted to fantasize about having sex with them?"
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/18 10:04 AM
2

I've tried being extra affectionate in terms of kissing and cuddling, being complimentary about their body and saying that just because I'm saying we should wait a bit doesn't mean I don't want to but then they say that they don't want to be tested. I think you could consider doing the opposite strategy here. My hypothesis (take with a grain of salt, all statements are guesses): Being extra affectionate and complimentary is just increasing his anticipation of sex and magnifying the frustration w…
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/18 09:51 AM
4

Many male desires have been characterized as unacceptable Seconding this. There's a lot of social pressure out there for men to not focus on looks and weight as much. The result is men concealing their true preferences.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/18 09:50 AM
2

I can't read your SO's mind, but my guess is that he's lying when he says the picture "looks disgusting". Not that many men find fit women repulsive. The more likely hypothesis is that he's lying.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/18 09:48 AM
1

The Rules has a lot of advice about how to get a man to decide for himself that he wants to be your boyfriend by rationing the time and attention you give to him before he commits. The specific strategies in the book are controversial, but I would absolutely recommend it to help jog your thinking.
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/18 03:46 AM
–

Partially at best, in my opinion. Yes, being skilled at making a man feel good -- through sex, respect, etc. -- is useful for sustaining a relationship. But my model for pair bonding is that a person becomes bonded when they give, not when they receive. The world is full of women who gave and gave and gave, become tightly pair bonded to their partner, only to have their hearts broken when they learn their partner hasn't developed the same feelings. And the world is full of men who do their submi…
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/18 03:06 AM
2

Emotional abuse combined with alcohol is a bad combination, and I think you should consider resources and comments about how to handle a partner who drinks and/or is an emotional abuser. As an alternative or supplement, you could do some reading to learn more about the psychology of men in relationships. From the sound of it I would guess that your husband is stressed out from work, feels worthless and scared, and interprets your communication style as challenging him. It sounds like you've figu…
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/17 08:51 AM
1

This is actually a good comment! Thanks! Probably is a feminist thought, but I've also observed men who seem to pedestalize women who are stable and peaceful not depressed. That's why I fear this fragility. Men are rightly skeptical of prospective partners with mental illnesses that cause a lot of drama or seriously screw up the woman's life. What you describe just sounds like, "I get real sad sometimes for half an hour." Men are also sometimes intimidated by women who don't seem to have any wea…
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/17 08:34 AM
2

You're on the right track, in my opinion. My belief: submissiveness triggers more submissiveness. Once you chose to show him respect, you felt more respectful. Your body language reflected that. Your body knows how to do this. However, you have to choose to show him respect in the first place. It doesn't come naturally to women to show that kind of respect to their partner unless he insists on that respect himself. The chapter in For Women Only about respect is really good.
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/17 08:15 AM
1

Let me offer a different option from what I've seen in the thread so far. Talk to him about the incident. Tell him that you felt upset. But blame yourself instead of him. Praise him. And apologize for your reaction. Something like: "Hey... the other day when you called me to tell me to have a nice day... when you joked about me being a princess or a drama queen, I felt really anxious. I was freaking out because of the hair dye thing. I know I was just overreacting... you were being a good boyfri…
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/17 09:56 PM
2

I think also I have perfectionist tendencies so I don't ever ask for help, I'm afraid to be seen as weak... I fear this will hold you back. Embracing femininity means embracing the perception that you're weak (at least in certain ways). See my longer (too long) comment for some ideas on how to improve how other people react -- especially your SO. I note that their reactions are all ones we give to people to affirm their strength and avoid implying that they're weak. They're ones that men give to…
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/17 09:33 PM
3

Reading your post I think to myself, "this woman has something to offer." Here's an example of how that could work in practice. Figure out what your boyfriend could do or say during one of your mood swings to make you feel better (which probably means "feeling the most loved"). Would it help if he held you? How should he hold you? Would it help if he told you that you're beautiful? What words would he use? These ideas are submissive gestures from your boyfriend towards you. Figure out how could …
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/17 09:15 PM
3

He took me to a restaurant, but it was unexpectedly closed. He apologized, but of course I just smiled and shrugged. He started looking up a different place, but his phone wasn’t working and he complained a bit. Well, my phone was fine, and before RP I would have said “let’s look it up on my phone,” but now I just kept smiling, and leaned my head on his shoulder as we waited. That's great. I would love if a woman did that in this situation. Note that you didn't just trust his ability to solve th…
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/17 08:14 PM
6

Where do I go from here? I've invested so much emotion and time into this guy and our relationship. I already feel lost and I haven't done the deed yet. After you ditch the guy, I recommend you: Look for what you want, since this guy isn't it. Continue working on yourself, so you have a better ability to get what you want. That's just a good general template for being single. Sounds like your Christian practice has you on exactly the right track.
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/17 08:11 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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