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perrierwoof Archive

View 6 posts and 73 comments by perrierwoof on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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9

I believe this to be true. Whenever I have a problem with my relationship, my first instinct is to run. My father always advises me to stay calm and think about the situation. My mother OTOH panics and thinks about running too.
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/17 07:48 AM
3

I know exactly what you mean because I had an ex-boyfriend who was that crabby blaming guy, and I just couldn't stay with him for obvious reasons.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 11:47 PM
1

Save the post u/SouthenAthena wrote. Go listen to any man's story of how feminism ruined his life, really listen to his story, and compare it how the woman in Athena's story behaved. Yes, but the problem is we don't tend to hear about those stories of men after women left them. How do we as women come across these men? We don't. That's why I'm searching for anecdotes.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 10:31 PM
2

I loved reading this post, because my boyfriend suffered a job loss last year, and although he's not sick it's very similar. A lot of women would leave, and we both found out how we both deal with stress. He was similar to your boyfriend in that he was very stoic and put on a brave face. I feel like knowing we can both stick it out during a time of distress shows that our eventual marriage will be strong. Thank you for your post!
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/17 08:54 AM
1

Both of us could work 40 hours a week and one of us could see the kids off to school and the other could be home when the kids get home. We would both spend evenings and weekends with our kids. And what does your SO say when you tell him exactly this? I know I'm making assumptions but it seems like your SO wants you to be the one to see them off to school AND be home when the kids come home (which is typically 3pm, so if you work the standard 9-5pm then someone has to come home early, or else...…
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/17 12:36 AM
2

Judging from your responses to people explaining your SO's position, it doesn't seem like you're open to seeing his point. I would try to talk to him about it and see if he sees your side.
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 11:33 PM
9

But there are just as many parents with mindsets like yours that try to jam parenthood into their existing personal and professional life as if it were just some scheduling conflict to manage. Let me ask you this: why do you even want to bother having kids? Quoted for emphasis.
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 06:10 PM
2

Understood.
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 04:08 PM
1

Yes and I agree, I'm just saying it's so contradictory some of the RP statements about looking nice and attractive and how weight is such a deciding factor in attraction, but in reality it doesn't really matter, the reality is a man will still marry a girl who is physically unattractive as long as she is nice and pleasant. I can't tell you how many young early 30's men I know who have nice wives, intelligent wives, yet overweight. It's like men specifically look for the nice girl who is less att…
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 01:42 PM
0

Another friend got engaged yesterday. What's interesting is all the four girls I know (three who got engaged, one is getting married this summer), completely go against RPW tenets. They're ALL overweight, (not obese but definitely overweight) and three of them smoke. But, I do observe that they're all very nice girls. So its seems like weight isn't even a factor, like RP/RPW preaches. And the guys they're engaged to aren't losers or anything, the men are genuinely intelligent guys with a good he…
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 10:55 AM
1

Observed. One of my girlfriends got engaged two days ago, another got engaged last week, my colleague is getting married this summer. And just found out another couple got engaged today.
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/17 09:52 PM
3

While I agree with you about being useful, I think men need to be more forgiving to this "usefulness." For example, wife is busy working, taking care of domestic duties and/or children. She might gain some weight because she's stressed and doesn't have time for the gym, all her time is taken up by her duties. Husband stops being attracted or looks at other women who are more fit or attractive, because those women don't have children or are not working full-time and can have time to work out. In …
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/17 01:48 PM
7

I would keep another set of my beauty products at his place (if you can't buy a whole other set then buy some travel containers and decant). As for books, you'll just have to prepare better. As mentioned I wouldn't rush moving in just for convenience either.
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/17 06:09 AM
8

Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 08:52 PM
3

Thanks, I can always learn from married people. I have been talking to two of my close girlfriends (that recently got engaged) so I know what relationship struggles they had as well. So I know it's not just roses and bunnies, I see how much they have invested and worked through with their fiancé. And I have slowly cut out girlfriends from my life that I don't want to emulate - either single feminists or shrew wives. It's definitely good to learn what NOT to do...! Thankfully I work at a school w…
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 08:45 PM
6

Since you've mentioned "certain circumstances," are those things you can help out with to move that 1-2 years to 6 months - 1.5 years? Not really, because they're to do with his job. Also, have you talked to him about maybe having a longer engagement with maybe a cheaper ring? Good idea, I haven't really thought about this.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 07:55 PM
11

That's true, being bitter is an attraction killer, confidence killer, and not a good way to go through life. I know I should concentrate on controlling things that I can control - my happiness, for one.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 07:50 PM
2

I've gotten more male attention as a 28 yo because I've learned how to present myself and flirt better. I was a pretty shy and awkward ugly duckling in my "prime" (18-24yo).
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 07:46 PM
6

Also--is it the ring and the ceremony that you want, or a need to not lose face in front of your friends? No, I don't actually care about the ceremony, but I do care about the status of being a wife and not just a girlfriend. You probably want to minimize contact with any "friends" that definitely appear to be rubbing your face in their rings. Hopefully they are nicer than that. They're not rubbing it in my face, my friends are not evil people. I'm genuinely happy for them. I just feel like I'm …
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 07:41 PM
5

Thanks, good reminders!
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 06:38 PM
0

That's very true. I know I won't get away with being a blob at home when I'm married.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 01:30 PM
3

I'm not really on Facebook that much to be honest, so no I'm really not affected. It's hanging out with my friends in real life and hearing what's going on in their lives. (It's a bit sad to say "in real life" in 2017) That's a good suggestion to enjoy what I have now and my independence. I do know that I would probably get judged for getting takeout or going to the spa as much as I do now, if there was a man tracking my every move.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 01:27 PM
5

What if it's not social media? It's my friends that I spend time with in real life and my colleagues that I see every day. People in my daily life. One my colleagues is getting married this summer, one of my good friends I go out to dinner with just got engaged, my flatmate is moving out to live with her boyfriend.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 01:06 PM
4

Yes, but only if that means I consult people (bosses, colleagues, mentors, family, friends). As far as completely on my own, absolutely not.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/17 08:25 AM
7

Kind of laughing because my crush in college had a girlfriend named Stacy and she basically was a hot basic bitch that partied and got laid easily.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/17 08:23 AM
1

When you say RP truth do you mean the biological part of it?
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 09:18 AM
2

Wow I never realized there was a Wikipedia entry about Chad! Very intriguing.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 08:11 AM
4

But then why didn't he want to get married? If theoretically they had a relationship exactly like a marriage just minus the paper, what's the big deal of just making it legal? It seems shady to me in that case. If two people are committed to each other and the legality gives you MORE benefits, why not? In the case of fear of divorce rape for the man, if he didn't want to get married it seems like he didn't trust her.
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/17 09:36 PM
1

What kind of Asian are you? Do you live in Asia and born and raised? It's sort of interesting because East Asian parents (meaning parents of the millennial generation) typically had a STEM working husband and then a SAHM. But I've noticed for millennial Asian American couples (both are Asian) it's common to have both man and woman working in STEM or medicine. There's so many Asian doctor couples or Asian engineering couples. I wonder if it's because that's the only way they can meet people? Also…
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/17 09:27 PM
2

I don't think it's the point of being holy but it's the point of why buy the cow when you're giving the milk away for free. I mean obviously it varies for each couple and it does work out sometimes, but I've also seen way too many couples who have lived together for YEARS, woman was in smitten and hoping for marriage and the relationship was going that direction in every single way, their lives totally intertwined, then the man realizes she's not going to be his wife. But he's OK with her living…
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/17 09:06 PM
1

Just out of curiosity, did you talk about marriage in the future before moving in together? And if not, what would happen if you continued to live with him hoping for eventual marriage but one day he realizes he doesn't want you as a wife? Would you move out?
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/17 09:03 PM
5

Once a woman moves in, the guy gets everything he wants and would have in a marriage, minus the legality of the relationship marriage confers. If anything, it can easily lead to him delaying marriage even longer because he basically has 'marriage' in all but name only. Yes agreed. Although I have seen it work out for a few couples, but I feel it's risky. It also draws out the process longer (living together for a few years before marrying, typically) and you have to be willing to risk those few …
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/17 04:03 PM
1

The post was never about courthouse weddings although I can see how that's misunderstood. When I say legality I mean that in a sense of legal status and commitment of love. I'm predominantly talking about bridezilla weddings or those over the top proposals and women feeling sorry for you if you didn't spend thousands and had everything perfect. As I mentioned in my post I would also like to have a modest wedding as a celebration.
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/17 12:55 AM
1

But it means that our community sees us as married, which we wouldn't necessarily get with a courthouse wedding & nothing more. I consider the community aspect an important one in terms of making sure that marriage is venerated by all. That's a good point. Because the legal aspect is secondary to the commitment between two people, in my opinion. Definitely it should be the commitment between two people first, but that's what I'm also saying, you don't need a fancy wedding to celebrate that commi…
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/17 12:09 AM
3

Are you marrying a person or a piggy bank? Well I'm personally not. I'm just playing devil's advocate. If you expect your man to provide the high value of a higher standard of living that comes along with a higher income - you ought to be offering a higher standard of value to him as well. That's when it's reasonable. If you just expect to be pampered, then it's unreasonable. Who said I'm expecting, or anyone that's expecting to be pampered? That's what the post is about. Raising your own value …
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/17 05:27 PM
7

The ridiculously large traits women have for "mr. perfect" when you have clear life goals and you know what type of man you want to share those goals with. So how is it ridiculously large trait if a woman wants a man with money so she can be a SAHM? How is it a ridiculously large trait if a woman wants a man who works for a corporation so he has stable income? How is it a ridiculously large trait if a woman wants a man who has a very active social life because she likes that life too? What if th…
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/17 07:57 AM
4

This post wasn't about rich guys anyway or finding that perfect man to give you that life. It was about types of men that you attract. None of those types up there are necessary "bad," they're just different. A greater beta man would be easier to handle and would protect you more while if you married a socialite alpha he's expecting a lot out of you to keep up with his fast lifestyle.
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/17 07:27 AM
6

I have to agree here, I've attracted two lone wolf guys, and I've noticed what happens is they are simply seeking companionship at the beginning, then when I prove what I can contribute to their lives, they are fiercely protective of me won't let me go. These types of men don't "look for a wife" they tend to look for interesting women then realize that you're a catch.
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/17 07:22 AM
0

Well my point is it's better to have a beta boyfriend because everything is in the woman's favor but I could never respect a man who just let me make the decisions and walk all over him.
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/17 09:57 PM
3

I don't understand why people leave the love of their lives, why not try to work through it? It sounds like in your case she was the love of your life but you were the one who left her. Why? And of she was so crazy at the end why did you love her that much?? My boyfriend has a friend who loved this girl so much and was engaged, only to break it off and marry another girl in year later. My boyfriend claims his friend does not truly love the new girl but he loved his ex girlfriend. Then why break …
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/17 12:55 PM
2

If you date a man in his 30's, he's going to have baggage of some sort. As with women in their 30's.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/17 12:52 PM
0

Yes I do have this of being direct. I'm not very good at being confrontational and I tend to let it go and bottle it up inside. I feel like it's rude to say "please stop talking about my relationship" or "stop giving me advice." I'm trying to learn how to deal better because I think what happens is I'm so passive about it so that's why these friends are pushy (because they think that's what I want but it's not). While I might have fueled her and I need to be more direct, however I did only legit…
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/17 08:28 AM
1

Thank you. I think part of it has to do with her personality and her career. She's a very successful businesswoman. She knows how to talk. She gets off on being social and getting attention and being in people's business (whether it personal or work) and she's very calculative (she can see through people and put two and two together to get the maximum benefit for her). So that's why she thinks she's being helpful when to me she's butting into my business. I know she's not a bad person. Maybe we …
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/17 07:40 AM
2

The best way to share a life is to build a life worth sharing. I loved this sentence and the more I think of it the more it's true. I'm just thinking of a woman who is great domestically but nothing else - what more could she share besides household duties? That's why it's so important to be your own person/woman. Have your own interests and hobbies. Then you can contribute something to the relationship besides just exchanging provider/domestic/sexual favors. What's more to you besides being a m…
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/17 08:59 PM
0

Yeah I'm sure she had good intentions too. It just really irritated me when she would try to solve my problem when I just didn't want to talk about it, you know? That's what it was. When I told her "never mind I don't want to talk about it" but she still had the nerve to push her opinions on me. That's what really pissed me off. She was being too helpful and I just didn't want it.
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/17 05:27 PM
1

Yes, I know I fueled her and I'm for sure going to stop talking about my relationship to her. I didn't realize she would act this way. Obviously after the third episode I decided I had enough and something needed to change. I just don't know if I should confront her or just cut my friendship with her. Again she brings it up when I didn't in the first place. Actually just writing this makes me feel like I should just cut contact. Her advice isn't even that helpful it just makes me more paranoid a…
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/17 05:03 PM
1

That's exactly why I don't understand women who must need rich husbands. A woman I know married a rich oral surgeon and he spent 100k on a wedding and bought a crazy expensive apartment in NYC but she's always unhappy. Because he's a beta dork and not physically attractive or confident (at least not with women). You need enough money to survive. But now and again I believe personality and character compatibility is the most important not having a six figure income.
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/17 12:18 AM
4

A lot of high value men will flirt with any woman, because it's part of their value to be socially adept. I would say he's legitimately interested only if he actually asks her out. I say this because I know too many men like this because they get off on making women bask in attention. I mean sure, give it a shot and the worst that happens is he turns her down, but I do strongly feel if he's truly interested he will make an actual move not just flirt on the surface.
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 11:52 PM
1

Thank you again.
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 11:18 PM
1

Thank you so much, your comments have been very helpful in understanding this. I just felt like men wanted an emotionally strong woman because I know of a few couples where the woman is (or at least seems) pretty happy and stable, but also the man is a huge beta. I was just nervous that if I'm not always perfect then no one will be with me. Obviously that's an irrational fear because I've had several LTRs before. But it's just what I have observed. I've also heard of men leaving their wives beca…
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 04:15 PM
1

You fear your boyfriend will not want to protect you because of your emotional problems but thats the exact opposite reason emotional instability is a red flag men. All too often men are more than will to stay in an abusive relationship thinking they can help their partner. Sorry could you elaborate on this? So he won't look down on me for being anxious and fearful? I thought men wanted a woman who was strong emotionally so they can put her on a pedestal. I'm not cruel towards other people but I…
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 07:07 AM
1

But doesn't self harm scars means emotional instability??? I mean I'm generally fine now but I do have minor relapses (meaning small bouts of depression here and there) and I have normal PMS times. But definitely nothing as serious as before. I feel like it's still a red flag and it makes me scared. Because then I feel like he won't see me as someone to "protect" because I'm so messed up. I'm still working on my moods and it will be something I have to continuously work on because it's not somet…
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 03:34 AM
3

I think this is what it is. I'm overcompensating and it's making me unhappy. I just need to try to still improve but let go of other people's choices or opinions.
/r/RedPillWomen14/05/17 09:22 PM
2

Yes I've had a more volatile life than most I would say. I struggled a lot with depression due to existentialism crises and some self worth. Still do. For me I like my boyfriend because he's on a mission and exactly the qualities you said, he has a strong hand and gives me enough attention but he also helps me stay independent (because I can't be as clingy it makes me feel worthless so my independence is important). Yes I would say if my friends know what my relationship was like they would thin…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/17 08:25 AM
1

Actually it's sort of the opposite. my friends are American and they value working for a big corporation because of money so they think it's stupid to be a freelancer. My boyfriend just prefers the independent lifestyle and he's building a name for himself to be a construction and business magnate in a developing country. It takes a long time to develop and he struggles sometimes but he's made connections with all the big businesses and he might be meeting the president soon because they want to…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/17 08:20 AM
2

Yeah that's exactly it. He dreams of this independence and freedom. I believe in him. He's not American and we don't live in America so it's a little more difficult too. Seriously it's really not as easy to build yourself up outside the US. But he has these dreams and I support him so much. I mean if you look at his resume it's like managerial or consultant positions with many companies. He just really prefers to be independent and I understand this. I've dated corporate guys and they're so jade…
/r/RedPillWomen11/05/17 04:17 PM
1

Yes exactly this!
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/17 10:39 PM
1

Thus is exactly that! Are you INFJ? Our personality type says that we can be people person but then shut down and friends are confused because they've seen our charming friendly side. Sometimes I actually don't know how to talk to people just a "normal" conversation because I'm so used to being "on."
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/17 10:36 PM
1

Because my friends are rich and posh and have husbands who make over six figures so they feel superior having a breadwinner husband. Again my boyfriend works for a family business and he's seen as a "drifter" because he's the one out getting jobs and projects. He doesn't just show up to the office and is a good boy. And I've seen many relationships where the woman is so obsessed with money and status but there's no love between the two.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/17 10:15 PM
2

My boyfriend comes from a country where there are not big corporations rather family businesses. He works for his family and for himself. So he's not really a typical drifter/bum.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/17 11:20 AM
2

I understand. I don't try to lure anyone on purpose, it's just how I am, unfortunately. I guess I can't really help then. Just be yourself if you want to be genuine.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 11:45 PM
5

Thanks that really made me feel better. I do feel like I have higher intelligence in some way (mostly interpersonal intelligence) and my parents have said I'm too smart for my own good and that's why I struggle with mental illness. My boyfriend accepts me and we enjoy life together. I have debated if I want one of those cookie cutter marriages (dating normally with a corporate guy and marrying before 30 because societal expectations and then buying a house and letting him work up the ladder and …
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 11:04 PM
4

This comment is really funny to me because I'm a performer (as my job). I can easily put on an act and be extremely charming. It lures a lot of guys in but then I have a difficult time figuring out what I want, and also at the same time they figure out that I'm not so charming 24/7 and I need a lot of down time. Not sure if other people are like this dating, putting their best self forward then having to transition into their normal personalities. Maybe I'm mentally ill.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 10:48 PM
2

It's so tricky because I also feel like I have to pretend I'm perfect and also I don't want people talking about my relationship. We all know women gossip. I do it too. I don't really trust anyone but my parents to keep things to themselves. So then I feel pretty closed off in general and maybe the best way is to ask Reddit strangers.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 10:29 PM
3

Yes and another big issue is I have a lot of red flags. Nothing to do with drugs or sex but I used to cut myself and I have some scars on my arms. I realized there were some "normal" guys that were freaked out about it. But I want someone to accept me and my past and how far I've come. He does just that. He doesn't beat me or anything and he works full-time just not with some big corporate honcho.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 10:14 PM
2

Yeah I mean I feel like why does it matter if my friends like my boyfriend or not. He treats me well. He might be a bit of a lone wolf but as am I. I have some pretty big red flags anyway. I honestly don't feel like "normal" guys would want to date me.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 10:07 PM
1

You're misunderstanding. I'm not the main breadwinner. He doesn't make "little money," he simply make a middle class income instead of an upper middle class income (the remarks were coming from upper middle class friends). I actually have a very low paying job in most situations, except right now where I was able to get a good (but rare) position. His job is much more lucrative than mine.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 09:51 PM
3

Another comment to the drifter comment - maybe we get along because I'm a drifter too. I've thought about this. I have had dates with these so called corporate guys and I just don't get along with them. I find them to be like a mouse on a wheel and a bit fake. I like my boyfriend because he's very independent and he does not follow the crowd. Our life is not an American sitcom where everything is perfect and he gets fat at his 9-5 job or whatever. I feel like I'm living life with him and I feel …
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 09:15 PM
3

Maybe your friends are just concerned for you because your boyfriend comes across as a bit of a drifter type. I think that's what it is. And I do realize this too. But at the same time I see so many of my friends with husbands who aren't drifters but they're not even that happy!!!!!! So what's the point?? I know women with husbands who make 300k and they have everything they want (including work or no work for themselves) and again, still not happy. A friend who married an oral surgeon who makes…
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 08:28 PM
1

I'm willing to move and find a job to be with him. I guess sometimes feminism still gets to my head ("he should work hard to chase you if he really wants you" bullshit). I acknowledge that both people have to pull their weight to be together. He would provide the house for us if I move and I am compassionate of how hard he is working to make it feasible from us. I guess I keep hearing my friend's voice saying things like "don't be stupid to move, you have a good job, tell him to find a job near …
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/17 10:02 PM
1

He took the job because the company closed. His home country does not have any jobs. The economy is in the shit. He had to move to make a better life for himself. We talked about him seeing how the new job is and I will visit him to see what my options are. I would not make as much money there as I currently do now, but I would be a wife and still work part-time.
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/17 09:39 PM
1

I see a couple of red flags in your situation. One, is your boyfriend's career similarly limited by geography? Did he have to move in order to find work, or was it optional? If he already had an acceptable job, and prioritized a career upgrade over being with you ...... hmm, I'm not sure how much I'd sacrifice in that case. Yes, he had to move. We are not Americans. It was required and he could not stay in the previous job because the company closed. His home country does not have any jobs, or a…
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/17 09:34 PM
5

I actually met my current boyfriend online, but I was also asked out by colleagues, people who work in the same building but not office, friends of friends, even at a concert! I just learned how to be more sociable and approachable and they literally came flocking.
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/17 05:28 AM
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