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persistencepays Archive

View 1 post and 35 comments by persistencepays on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Dated exclusively for a year before moving in together, then were engaged for 18 months—had to save up for the wedding. I'm sure if you tell him "I want to but I'd like to wait a while", he'll fully accept and respect it.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/15 04:28 PM
2

He's so sweet and good to me. This is wonderful, he sounds like a great guy. I was in a similar exact situation except we were both 28, and he wanted to move in with me rather than me with him, and I didn't have the parental/cultural issue you do. I'd never lived with a man before. I told him we could only live together if it would lead to serious commitment within a year. He moved in in June, and proposed in September. I think men typically get married for 3 reasons. 1) They want to get more of…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/15 03:27 PM
5

"Is it ever possible for me to be a good wife?" Yes! I believe your posting here is proof of that! I'm not qualified to comment on mental health issues, but based on your wanting to be better, here are some ideas for you; I realize they may or may not be relevant or possible given your mental situation. Every time you say something negative to yourself in your head, interrupt it and say to yourself something positive, like "I am becoming a great wife!" or "I am so thankful for my husband!" Being…
/r/RedPillWomen04/01/15 04:57 PM
1

Your pride in him is evident. Great marriage success story & happy ending.
/r/RedPillWomen04/01/15 12:01 AM
2

How widespread is cheating? Studies have shown 1 in 25 fathers may not be the biological parent of the child they think is theirs. http://www.theguardian.com/society/2005/aug/11/childrensservices.uknews It just seems dumb to me. Oh, it is dumb. Check out /r/adultery sometime.
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/15 04:18 PM
1

More than fine for men to reply too, I figured RP men's reaction would be something like "reminds me of myself, glad he finally figured it out!" For me as a woman it was fascinating to read because we do not see male pain expressed in such a vulnerable way very often, because of the social taboo. And, because it does seem that he was collateral damage of "feminist ideology". If men were also allowed to show frailty and benefit from empathy, this would confuse the narrative that men have been hol…
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/15 04:10 PM
7

This incredible piece of self-revelation has incited many a tweet and thinkpiece since he wrote it two weeks ago. From the above-linked "Comment 171" by Scott Aaronson: At one point, I actually begged a psychiatrist to prescribe drugs that would chemically castrate me (I had researched which ones), because a life of mathematical asceticism was the only future that I could imagine for myself. The psychiatrist refused to prescribe them, but he also couldn’t suggest any alternative: my case genuine…
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/15 12:16 AM
1

Fascinating, never knew this existed! Would love to hear more...
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/15 03:23 AM
12

If men seeking LTRs see virginity as a signal of 'high value' and perhaps dependability, what is the equivalent signal that women should look out for? The textbook answer would be "Ability to provide us with resources and status". Obviously, the things that make a man "high value" make him tougher to "get" or hold onto as well. I just watched a YouTube video that was so RP. It was a VICE documentary about neo Nazi Bikers in Germany. Their girlfriends were all gorgeous. (No, I'm not saying it's R…
/r/RedPillWomen01/01/15 04:51 PM
1

The Rules is by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schnieder: http://www.amazon.com/All-Rules-Time-tested-Secrets-Capturing/dp/0446618799 Here's a low-quality scan of the book https://www.scribd.com/doc/195571788/Ellen-Fein-The-Rules
/r/RedPillWomen01/01/15 04:50 PM
5

I'm not sure what people here think of The Rules but I think it's a great "girl game textbook". Basically says look your best, be feminine and sweet , be a challenge, be happy and busy with your own life rather than clingy, and don't chase men, allow them to chase you. I thought that I would be met with a grimace of inconvenience when I asked a friend to help me move a heavy box down up from my basement, but his chest visibly puffed out Earning a favourable impression from somebody by asking the…
/r/RedPillWomen31/12/14 04:00 PM
3

Agree! I think every young person should have two books put in their hand on their 14th birthday: Carnegie's How To Win Friends, and Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus!
/r/RedPillWomen31/12/14 03:45 PM
2

You sound extremely self-aware. How long have you been dating? If you're over 25, two years should typically be long enough for him to know whether he wants to marry you or not. Men don't need us to be perfect to marry us. Happily for us. How to be less wound up? For me: deep breathing, clearing your mind and focusing just on your breath for a few minutes; work out every day even just walking; eat 100% healthy for a few days, just meat/fish/eggs/vegetables; relax on the couch with an episode of …
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/14 03:41 PM
3

That's wonderful that at your young age you're coming to this understanding. You are going to save some heartache. I think men love women who work out a lot. I work with men and they love to mention that their wife is at the gym every day, was kayaking with the girls this weekend, whatever. I think it shows high value: "my wife wants to stay in shape for me." Two mindblowing RPW books you can read are Surrendered Single and Surrendered Wife. Makeup is extremely fun. I'm betting once you get into…
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/14 03:35 PM
4

If it were me I wouldn't bring it up... Masculine men do what they want. If he's asking you out, spending time and money on you, you're what he wants. When he tells you other people think there's something going on, that's him being a bit cocky. Like, hey, these jokers at work insist gals can't help wanting me, can you believe it? It's funny/cute. Let me guess: she's histrionic, few female friends, crazy hair & tattoos—she's pretty right? Men like the energy they get from being around pretty wom…
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/14 12:22 AM
19

So great, thanks for posting, lots of gems. Love her first point: "If you think marriage would have been much easier with somebody else, you're probably wrong." I think women do get divorced sometimes due to a delusion that there's some romantic white knight out there who will fit our female idea of how men should express love, rather than trying to understand male psychology and how they actually do express love.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/14 12:04 AM
1

What is up with you kids these days. You're expected to turn over your phone so a boyfriend or girlfriend can read your texts?! That is bizarre. Men and women should both be able to have some privacy with their same-sex friends. You should just assume she's talking about her menstrual cycle or something. Your instinct is correct that it's needy to obsess. If she's talking about you, all the better! Maybe she's saying how she's upset you don't pay more attention to her! She's teasing you and it's…
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/14 08:49 PM
1

I love your attitude that you have not "hit the wall", you don't need him to save you and you're not desperate. You want to be radiating that sense of calm self-sufficiency. My personal opinion here. Do not ask him out. Do not rush it. Let him be the aggressor and make the first move. Let him lead. He knows if he wants to date you. Don't "help" him. Wait for him to come to you. It will be so much better. You're getting into fantasy relationship danger territory here if "sparks are flying" but yo…
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/14 08:31 PM
4

Ditto. Do not buy him a present.
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/14 08:18 PM
2

I would say, don't make a general comment like "I want us to talk more". Instead ask specific questions. It's better if when you ask him questions, the purpose is to get to know him better as a person, and assess his suitability for you. It should not be because you crave assurance, or want some sort of promise that he's not just dating you for fun. Men sense that and are repelled by it. Ideally you should get more involved in your own life, pursue your own education and interests, cultivate you…
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/14 08:15 PM
5

At the risk of appearing persnickety I'm going to answer a bit different from everybody else. This is my opinion only and I'm not a male psychology expert. I don't think you should've offered to change the plan at all. You're not his wife and this is not the household budget. It's his own money and he's in charge of it. I know you're going to say "I just wanted to give him an out." Men can figure this stuff out themselves. If he ever wants to change the plan, he'll tell you. And don't ever say "…
/r/RedPillWomen08/08/14 10:12 PM
1

Agree that this post seems trollish. Anyway, to any young women reading this who might be re considering law school just because you have no direction in life and think it's a path to the upper middle class, make sure you talk to some actual lawyers before you do, and do some reading and critical thinking. Here's a good discussion of reasons why not to go to law school. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tucker-max/law-school_b_2713943.html There's also a very detailed blog, written by a law professo…
/r/RedPillWomen08/08/14 09:39 PM
1

Men don't typically love it when women give them physical-based compliments. That's more a masculine-to-feminine dynamic. Try giving him compliments like "you're the best"; "you're so strong" when he lifts something heavy; "you handled that perfectly" when he tells you about some success at work. Just say the sincere compliment and see the reaction, I bet he will glow with happiness. About the body shyness issue: Instead of focusing on his body and feelings, have you tried just saying "let's lea…
/r/RedPillWomen04/08/14 07:19 PM
2

If he outright refuses your help, perhaps you should respect that and stop risking emasculating him by trying to force help on him. Worry about your own finances and saving your money for your future. Men are actually really good at letting us know what they do and do not need from us, if we just listen. They really don't need to be saved by us against their protestations!
/r/RedPillWomen04/08/14 07:05 PM
1

If he feels like it's a "rambling" monologue, perhaps you are not asking him enough questions. Do you show a sincere interest in his life, thoughts and feelings? Being sincerely interested in the other person is the essence of good conversation.
/r/RedPillWomen04/08/14 07:00 PM
3

Yes, big mistake to just date for so long without marriage, if she wants to be married and have a family. She should break up with him now and move on, and date with the intention of getting into a committed relationship. Better do it now than when she is 35. Your friend's life is a worthwhile cautionary tale for young women reading this forum. By your late 20s, a year or two is enough for a man to know whether or not he wants to marry you. If he doesn't, move on! The handful women I know who ar…
/r/RedPillWomen04/08/14 06:50 PM
2

Your husband sounds terrific and you sound like his lovely oasis from the tough world. It really is stunning and sweet how delighted men can be by a delicious home-cooked meal.
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/14 11:36 PM
5

I get that the article is trolling us for pageviews, but some of the comments are disappointingly supportive of the hamsterthink. It's ugly how some people in their 20s act as jaded and cynical as people trapped in multi-decade awful marriages. "After eight years of monogamy", give me a break.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/14 12:23 AM
6

Hey, I am new to the sub but I'll weigh in... Good for her that she recognized that being rejected for sex by a boyfriend is a serious red flag. For most women her age and not married, that itself would be a signal to end the relationship. What I would say to focus her mind, if you feel comfortable to speak frankly, is to visualize where she wants to be a few years from now, and contemplate that she could end up pushing 30, unmarried and with a live-in boyfriend with no career direction. Any gra…
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/14 12:09 AM
2

Men tell us what they want. He broke up with you, then called to tell you he's going to date other women? Next. Set up some social activities with your female friends to distract yourself. Go to the gym. Get a stack of books out of the library. Don't waste time with men who are "just not that into you"
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/14 09:52 PM
2

You've gotta follow your intution but... If you don't have to get loans to do the course, you're only 21, you love the career, it's based on a practical skill set, you're already partway through, you're not married yet, and you're not ready as a couple to have a child just yet... it seems like you should go ahead and continue, doesn't it? Just to keep your future options open, as a family? And just in case the relationship doesn't work out and you need to support yourself? It will be tough or im…
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/14 01:22 AM
2

You're normal. When I was 21 I used to cry when I had a tough day at work. Now I'm 37, I can't remember the last time I cried about a personal problem. Life gets more balanced out and so do your emotions. If you're trying to suppress it for appropriateness reasons, in a school or work environment, "switch" your thoughts—force yourself to stop thinking about whatever's bothering you, just for a few minutes, by picking something else (preferably something positive & pleasant) to focus on.
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/14 01:20 AM
2

Glad everybody is agreeing that hiring a cleaning person is a great idea. We have a woman (an indivdual we found through friends, not a company) who cleans our house and she's fantastic, comes while we are out. I think it's perfectly fitting with being traditionally feminine to do things that help us avoid feeling exhausted and overworked. Please don't feel like a failure—that's terrific that you're making a concerted effort to have a neat and tidy home despite physical challenges.
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/14 01:02 AM
4

It's not that you must rudely cut them off, but in my opinion, it would be better for you to cultivate your female friends. Going out and doing activities with your female friends will create opportunities to meet men. You are extremely unlikely to meet a man when you're hanging out with your guy friends. John Malloy's book Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others discusses his research finding that women who have lots of female friends, and who work with marriageable-aged men, are statistically …
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/14 08:08 PM
3

That's nice that you don't view it as him "owing" you his help. In my opinion it's best if you're polite and specific. Say "please" and "thank you" when asking him to do something. You can also use the words "I need your help" or "may I have your help?" which will make an already loving and committed man feel like a brave rescuer. Finally, if you ask him to do something on Monday, and he doesn't do it right away, do not check back on Thursday and say "did you clean the eavestroughs like I asked?…
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/14 07:48 PM
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