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placated_doll Archive

View 7 posts and 69 comments by placated_doll on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Well, there's an intimate grooming issue where he prefers something that I hate, but I figure that I'm not trying to attract myself, so I go with his preference. Aside from that, I have a sort of philosophy that the people you are seen with are a reflection of you. When I'm with my man, I make an effort to simply be the best reflection of him that I can, and it seems to work.
/r/RedPillWives11/04/16 06:13 PM
3

This is inspirational to know that maybe I'm just focusing my efforts in something unfulfilling. I often find myself feeling lonely regardless of how busy I am or with how many people surround me. As for not putting it on your SO, this is so very true, and I can attest, first hand, to the difference it makes when you don't!
/r/RedPillWives11/04/16 01:21 PM
1

I didn't. My hope was to have a discussion within the sub by its users.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/16 11:53 AM
10

I think very attractive girls get hit on less often. They're so attractive as to be intimidating. Guys assume they'll be shot down, so don't even try.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/16 04:10 AM
1

This friend wants to be with you and feels you unattainable because you're in a very loving relationship with your man. So, what better way to get you OUT of a loving relationship with your man than to tell him it was you who was coming on to him? It seems, regardless of whether he was drunk or not, that this friend is capable of incredibly poor decision making where relationship boundaries are concerned. Tell your man. Show/forward him the text conversation. Think of it as a preemptive strike, …
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/16 03:48 AM
1

I agree, wholeheartedly. Sometimes, I want to know what is in the mind of a man vs. a woman. RP theory is founded on the idea that men and women view the world, particularly where love and relationships are concerned, in very different ways.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/16 03:29 AM
1

Oh, hell no. I'm not at all inclined to meddle in the love affairs of others. And, if I were, there's a way hotter girl in a different class.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/16 03:16 AM
1

This is kinda what I was going for. When I say I haven't been encouraging conversation, I mean just that. Saying anything more complicated than what you wrote would be way out of the blue.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/16 03:15 AM
1

This is an excellent point and one I've considered. If you wouldn't mind (and we can move this to pm, if you'd prefer), what did you do or say, and how did it all end?
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/16 03:08 AM
1

I just can't be that mean. It's not in me.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/16 03:06 AM
1

Only of he asks for a reason, then I say I'm busy, but usually it ends when I say no.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/16 12:19 PM
1

Mine, too; I thought it was indigestion.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/16 12:14 AM
-1

Is there a way for you to get involved without being in the way? Like, act as his assistant handing him tools or fetching him water, with the real goal being to engage him in positive conversation. That way, the work gets done a bit faster (even if it just shaves off 30 min. each evening) and his mind isn't able to dwell on negative thoughts for hours upon hours each week.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/16 12:10 AM
3

I feel pity. I'm just not sure what to do with it. (Edited for incomplete sentence. )
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 11:50 PM
3

I hope that doesn't happen. And while I'm not skeptical of his attitude, per se, I'm acutely aware by now that friendship isn't all he's after. And as for pulling my SO into it, I don't really want to do that either. He knows and likes to laugh at me about it, but if I gave him reason to believe this guy was a real issue, I think things would turn ugly.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 11:43 PM
3

He is, very literally, in all of my classes. He sits next to me specifically to talk to me. I could only avoid it by blatantly ignoring him, which I haven't/don't want to do.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 11:32 PM
1

I do have head phones and don't wait for him when I leave before him. I feel like it'd be mean of me to ignore him when he talks to me or just walk faster when he locks step with me. He's a really nice guy, and I don't want this to seem like I'm making good fun of him. And I'd be happy to be his friend if I thoight that was all he was interested in.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 11:25 PM
3

Don't enable beta-dom; coax him into growth by not encouraging this. I'm glad you said this. I've read here and on other RP subs that you shouldn't suggest RP, but I really think it would benefit him greatly. He is headed right down the path to beta-dom, and could easily fall into a BB role (math major, finance minor + orbiter/door mat personality + clearly has no idea about his SMV). He's a super sweet kid. I've actually considered giving him NMMNG as a going away present, of sorts. Good or bad…
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 11:17 PM
2

Has moved to sit next to me in all but one class, waits for me outside of class to walk with me to the next class, invites me out (with friends), invites me to his place (to "study"), tried to invite himself to my place (once; I shut that shit down with a quickness), suggested I attend a basketball game to see him perform (he's in the University band). I've declined every invitation, but they just keep coming.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 10:57 PM
2

He's not, though, he made a strong effort to be. He is in all of my classes, and has slowly moved to be near me in all but one of them. The one he hasn't is due his having another crush on a different girl (that I think he should actually go for, she's pretty clearly interested and reasonably close to him in age, but he's too young and dumb to see it). And I brought up my SO specifically because I wanted to send the message that I'm not available.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 10:47 PM
2

I probably should clarify. To begin with, I'm not bitter about what happened. I'm wiser, so thankful. I don't mean that I think people will never do what they say, but rather that I no longer count on it. Hope that clarifies; I know the wording I put in "sounds" harsh, but I'm actually kinda a softy. Also, I doubt I'll have this mindset forever. My current relationship is too new for me to turn over any sort of ultimate trust, but my SO does consistently exhibit (so far, anyway) trust worthy beh…
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 09:17 PM
1

He does; he thinks it's horrible for a totally different set of reasons than I do. As for trust? Trust no one. Ever.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 06:30 PM
18

Having hobbies and friends is gender neutral. Seriously, this post made me giggle.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 06:28 PM
1

It's not about fair.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 05:19 PM
3

If you just got out of an abusive relationship, I would actually encourage you NOT to seek out a relationship, right now. You will, unintentionally ofc, bring some of that baggage with you. ETA: High value men in the same geographical location tend to be in one anothers' social and career networks, and they will talk about you at some point when they realize they both know you. Try monk mode, instead. Improve yourself. Seek counseling to determine why you stayed in an abusive relationship. Focus…
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 05:17 PM
1

I removed my original post here as it contained personal information I did not wish to leave up.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 03:48 PM
-1

I think AWALT is a bunch of bs. My understanding of RPW is that it is a philosophy to use to garner long term commitment from the best possible mate for you. I need qualities reflective of both alpha and beta. Too much alpha leaves me frightened and feeling like an outsider in my own relationship. Too much beta disgusts me.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 01:25 PM
1

Except that, you know, alphas do marry. Not all of them, of course, but quite a few. Why? Because they decided that, for whatever reason, they wanted to.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 12:10 PM
2

Good catch!
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 12:06 PM
1

It's not; I wasn't around back when this was put up, but it's definitely a good read. Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 12:21 AM
2

People don't follow you unless you treat them well. This is true! I also like the thoughts about it being less to do with what the action is and more to do with whether or not the action is coming from a place of security or weakness a la /u/redpillredneck. Looking at it from that perspective, it makes sense why kindness is weakness in some, but a strength in others.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/16 12:18 AM
1

Personally, I think marriage is a horrible idea. I know the men-folk here believe that all marriage laws are against them; they're not. Marriage laws favor whoever was the lowest earner. If you need a party to show off your comitment, have a commitment ceremony. That said, if my SO wanted to get married, I would. I'd insist on a pre-nup, but I'd do it.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/16 10:12 PM
2

At 18, I wish I'd made friends with a more diverse and wider group of people instead of sticking to my little clique and that I'd done a better job of balancing school and social life. I wish I'd learned to cook good, balanced, healthy, tasty meals because fitness is about 80% diet. I wish I'd worked out. I have more regrets of how I wasted my youth, but I think the rest are mostly just byproducts of the things above.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/16 09:47 PM
1

I want neither. I want an oak (a term I stole from MRP), best of both worlds!
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/16 03:20 PM
5

I'll go first. I actually kinda see Donald Trump as the ultimate embodiment of my current understanding alpha; I also don't like him, at all, as he also seems like a tempestuous, overgrown toddler, so there must be more to male attractiveness than just "be alpha." Some of his alpha qualities are: IDGAF, understanding and use of social psychology to generate support, posturing, not second guessing himself and his decisions. And yet, I find him repulsive. So, "alpha = good" is clearly not the full…
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/16 02:54 PM
3

I'll throw my $0.02 in: Most everything about you makes you a great catch, and 29 is not old (especially if you don't look it). I would suggest looking for ways to cut back on work enough to have the ability to plug into your community. I have a friend who could be you (except she is religious), but the fact that she has devoted all of her time and energy into education and work without developing social skills has left her awkward and annoying. She is a know-it-all, and a lot of people keep the…
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/16 03:13 PM
2

If you don't have a five minute face routine, develop one. Mine is moisturizer with SPF, foundation if I have any visible blemishes, and mascara. Yours will be different, of course, and should play up your best assets. I love to dry and either straighten or curl my hair, but yeah, time. Make an appointment with a stylist and let them know ahead of time you're looking to develop a quick style that works with your hair's texture and is [professional, flirty, whatever your aim is]. I love to go to …
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/16 03:28 PM
2

Oh, for sure. I don't deny that there are outstanding individuals who have made fortunes with just their natural business savvy and a passion for X. But for most lucrative career paths, college is a requirement.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/16 01:15 PM
1

I absolutely do think things to death, and I'd love to be able to just let things go. My naturally high baseline anxiety level is something I'm actively working to lower.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/16 01:10 PM
1

I'm lucky enough to have several members of my family who run a cattle farm. She'd be packed and on a plane to BFE faster than she could bat an eyelash.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/16 04:47 AM
2

I suppose I don't see it as a waste since she said she isn't looking to marry soon. If OP is looking to marry soon, that changes the dynamic.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/16 01:52 AM
6

Upvoted. There was a hill I thought might be worth dying on (a friendship my SO disapproved of) just two weeks into my relationship with my SO. I'm so glad I chose him over the friend who has slowly imploded, and I regret having questioned his judgement. He saw, long before I did, that there was trouble on the horizon. Lesson learned.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/16 01:19 AM
2

He is young. You are, too, of course, but this tends to mean different things for men and women. Try not to let his moment of indecisiveness bring you down. Clearly, despite whatever he was thinking at the time, he ultimately recognized the value you bring and chose to stay in the relationship. I might also suggest not bringing up marriage and kids, anymore. Not because it's not something you want and hope he wants, but because he is a man. He will seek out that which he wants. When (if) he want…
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/16 12:53 AM
22

College is all about employability; anyone who thinks otherwise is foolish or very, very wealthy. Beyond that, I'm going to buck the trend. I recognize the spirit of the article, but I'm having a hard time getting behind the underlying message which seems to me to be that getting married is more important than getting any degree. And yes, the article focuses on the English BA (and hipsters), but the author goes on to reduce all degrees to meaningless. And her assertion that what one becomes afte…
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/16 12:38 AM
2

May I ask how old is your SO?
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/16 11:55 PM
4

You, of course, know him best. However, this new information (he is naturally, frequently flirty and reluctant to cut off such interactions) in addition the sudden change in behavior on his part is sending up all kinds of red flags. Maybe I'm over thinking it.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/16 09:51 PM
8

I lift 5 days a week. It's not masculine, I promise. I also promise that, so long as you're not taking steroids, you won't "get big." :)
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/16 01:19 AM
2

Actually, since I started applying the principles of rp and took everyones' advice, things have been phenomenal. I'd like to post a fr when I get back (I'm at a research related conference, right now, where I'm presenting). The short version is: I'm equally as lucky to have found both rp and my SO. :)
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/16 06:22 PM
2

Tori Amos if you're l specifically set on a live a concert (and assuming she's touring). If there is a concert near you, buy tickets early; she refuses to up her venue size, so concerts almost always sell out.
/r/RedPillWomen19/03/16 06:24 PM
9

"They can't toss their men the MRP playbook because they think they'll despise him for it. They're wrong, but they can't see it." Is that why you think women who find this sub wouldn't want to send their man here? You genuinely don't think it might have something to do with the verbal abuse you heap upon women who stumble in here? You're wrong, but I doubt you can see it.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/03/16 02:30 PM
3

So much this. I was overweight in my teens and obese in my early and mid twenties. My ultimate goal is 120, but my current goal is 140, and the closer I get, the more tweaking I have to do to my diet and exercise routine. You can do it. Really!
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/16 11:21 PM
1

Generally, I'd agree, but we very literally just had a disagreement over my demanding more time, and I'm still struggling with the grey area. He may, very well, have a positive response, but I don't want to push the issue.
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/16 04:11 PM
3

This. Is. Genius. I will start making/keeping a list handy. Sometimes, I do come across things I want, think to myself that they'd be nice to have, and then move on. This is a much better idea. And, I got a book recommendation, too! Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/16 05:17 PM
1

There are a few movies out that I'm interested in, so I offered those as ideas as well as two restaurants I've wanted to visit with him. So, we'll see how it goes.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/16 05:14 PM
2

Thanks for this. Before having it spelled it out to me, I didn't understand that, in this instance, it was okay to let him know that what I wanted was time, and do so in a positive way. I was afraid that asking for anything where time together was a given aspect would be poorly recieved.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/16 05:12 PM
3

@StingrayVC, @Littleknownfacts, Thank you. Dinner and a movie, it is.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/16 01:45 PM
1

I see his coming over as a possibility only if it's his idea. Otherwise, this would be great.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/16 01:43 PM
1

Maybe at some point; I think it might rub him the wrong way, right now.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/16 01:34 PM
2

I would like for him to surprise me. My answers (after the book) have been variations of "whatever you want to do" and "I don't really know what to tell you."
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/16 01:16 PM
3

I'm sorry. I posted this a few days ago: https://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/4a480x/letting_go_of_lonliness/ Tl/dr: I nagged him to spend more time with me and it went horribly.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/16 12:24 PM
1

Thanks; will do.
/r/askMRP15/03/16 04:35 AM
1

Because if he needs something from he, he says it.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/16 06:56 PM
0

"I do understand, cognitively, you're seeking attention here." Well, unless you post in the hopes that people will pass by what you say without reading (and certainly not responding to) it, then you, too, are here for attention.
/r/askMRP12/03/16 10:02 PM
1

[As an aside, how do I make quotes display like you do? It's more easy to read than putting things in quotation marks. ] "Of course he did. Your trying to control how he is spending his time. " You're right, and I didn't even see it as that. I feel like an ass, now. You're also right that I can see how my continued insistence will ultimately lead to the demise of the relationship. "Why should he have to? You don't seem like your budging either, only getting more demanding as the relationship pro…
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/16 09:47 PM
1

I actually already resolved not to bring up again for exactly the reason that you state here. "Have you heard of the Love Languages by Gary Chapman?" I haven't read the book, but I'm familiar with the premis. You are correct that my love language is quality time; I strongly suspect his is words of affirmation. And yes, he does show how much he cares in every other way but this. I'm not prepared to next him over this; I want to view it through the lense of price of admission (https://m.youtube.co…
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/16 08:11 PM
2

Well, we definitely do not live together. If we did, the issue, as it is, would cease to exist. We are both college students returning to school later in life. I'm 35; he's 27. He also works, whereas I'm going on the GI Bill, scholarships, grants, and loans. We've been together 4 months, and the frequency of our seeing each other hovers around one to two days a week. When we're together, we debate, we play video games, we go camping, we Netflix and chill, we go out to eat, etc.
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/16 05:42 PM
0

I don't deny sex without a very good (I.e. physical, unwelcome monthly guest) reason, so I don't think that is an underlying issue. "Do you think you can change into a person who is okay with little quality time?" I don't know. "And, if you leave and end up with a clingy beta, would you be happy with that?" No. I detest clingy men, which is probably the biggest irony. And, I suppose, it at at least guides the answer to the question before since I would experience similar issues with any guy who …
/r/askMRP12/03/16 04:15 PM
0

"Why do you have to be around him to have good feels?" This is an excellent question, and one I hadn't considered. I'll have to think about it. "Consider trying to reach a point where you're perfectly happy being single, totally on your own. At least that's one of the core tenets of TRP for men." The irony, I suppose, I that before him I was perfectly happy being single. Also, I'll check out /r/redpillwomen. Thanks.
/r/askMRP12/03/16 02:49 PM
1

"Is this man someone who you could follow? Is he someone you trust to lead you (and potential offspring)? Is he someone who can protect you? Is he "worth making an effort for"? If so, then your role is to follow his lead, support his decisions, make your opinions known to him but allow him to make the decision. " The answer to most of those is 'yes,' so then how to let it go? How does one move from 'this is what I really want' to 'but I trust you that I don't need it?'
/r/askMRP12/03/16 02:42 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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