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plainandpresent Archive

View 2 posts and 16 comments by plainandpresent on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Thank you! This was the purpose of my post for the most part :) I like the way you put that too "you probably notice" I'll def be using that!
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/26 06:20 PM
2

I have this same challenge, for me I'm neurodivergent and because I know this I give myself grace! Be easy on yourself. I rush conversations sometimes too, not literally but mentally! And that is exhausting. I also have a deep desire to get to know the people around me, but I don't really enjoy small talk, even though I might enjoy being there. That can apply to many settings, not just romantic. Something I say to newer romantic interests when I feel this pressure/anxiety start to rise I reassur…
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/26 10:52 PM
1

It used to be weekly, and lately (like within the past 3 months) it’s been… randomized, like I don’t always know when I’ll be seeing him next. We’re going on week 3 of not seeing each other and no plans to look forward to
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/26 05:32 PM
2

Someone else said it here perfectly it just feels like our texts are all logistics, and slowly starts to feel routine, low effort rather than connection or reaching out to me. So with that, I don't know if it means that I need to implement some better boundaries around texting or share that I'd like to talk on the phone a little bit more or something to that effect because how it is right now (going on week 3 of not seeing each other or having plans to look forward to) I feel uncertain my place …
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/26 02:25 PM
1

Yeah, I hear & see this perspective often.. he was like this in the beginning and lately, very comfortable with the texting. He is in a busy season and gave me the heads up of what that looks like so I felt like I consented to this but now I just feel my needs are getting met in this kind of dynamic
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/26 01:17 PM
2

I like that! And I've said something similar, not so much on logistics but I miss your voice, something to that effect and still just.. in default to text For my current situation, he is stretched thin with work it's a busy season so I'm focusing on myself right now and feel happy to do that but! I can't overlook the fact that our relationship is starting to feel low effort/low stakes all due to the texting thing.
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/26 01:14 PM
3

What I mean by pen pal I guess is when we get stuck texting, daily updates ext., seems more comfortable texting than calling or initiating next plans. In most cases I take this as their not interested or taking our connection seriously but more recently, someone I've been dating more seriously has fallen into this pattern.. and it's upsetting because while I enjoy chatting, we can't carry and move forward a 'relationship' via text. I get bothersome because at some point I feel off put by this an…
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/26 12:49 PM
2

He had to cancel 🫠 the last thing I could've expected this evening lol I just.... I'm starting to feel frustrated, friend!
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/26 12:57 AM
2

We talked about the desire to be married again within the first date/couple of dates. And then again around month 3-4 (somewhere around there) no talks of it since. Besides him asking what kind of wedding I would want, which came up naturally as my Aunt got married this winter. We have talked about relational 'wants' in awhile, nor where this is heading. And I agree, time goes by fast when you have a routine, I feel we need a refreshed routine for sure. It's like I don't feel like we're dead or …
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/26 07:30 PM
2

Thank you for sharing your experience and giving examples! Full transparency, I was raised seeing my mom doing everything for the relationship and my father in return not being very kind. So when I began studying RPW material, it felt foreign not because I don't appreciate my partners or because I have an 'unruly' nature but because I didn't see my mom have standards or create boundaries for herself to ensure her needs were also met., So I came out doing the same thing she did essentially and my…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/26 06:28 PM
2

I can understand why you have that question, I'm see that I'm kinda of conflating the two. Date planning - I'm not sure what he prefers. Does he like for us both to plan, for him to plan, for me to plan. Given the constraints lately all I know we want to see each other. But I don't think * either of us * have talked about our dynamic lately to know what would work best for us. Which leads me to my other point, Intimacy/emotional needs - I know I do best when expectations are talked about. I also…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/26 06:23 PM
1

I figure as much, I'd like to avoid having to bring it up at all. But doesn't change that i miss him in an emotional sense
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/26 04:45 AM
1

Heard! Yes he has great qualities, I wanted to lead with that understanding with my post. To be blunt, what I'm saying is i enjoy the closeness that comes with vulnerable talks, shared goals, plans to integrate/next steps from time to time. Not because I'm 'clingy' or low confidence, I just value those moments... knowing that I'm appreciated, my time & efforts are valued. That he can't wait for ___ * insert whatever brings him excitement. * I let it be known to him that I'm grateful for our rela…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/26 04:37 AM
2

Thanks for this. Sometimes I take dating advice or 'rules' too literally. In my first marriage, we were hs sweethearts, and honestly I had to plan a lot! I completely managed our lives & relationship, he was a more passive partner and morseso, it felt like he didn't care and eventually he made it clear that he didnt. Maybe I've gone too far in not wanting that dynamic again, and wanting a man that leads (consistently) I guess you can say I'm scared to fall into old habits really! I'm aiming for …
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/26 03:02 AM
1

Yeah, I can focus on this a little more intently. I value our connection. I'm just scared of us becoming stagnant or wasting time... i don't feel pressure about time but i do feel pressure about being and feeling fulfilled romantically
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/26 01:34 AM
-1

Unsure of whether he's invested in the relationship And yeah, I do understand that life happens, it's just been a little confusing lately, because he knows I like when we have plans and I'm excited for us to be together so, idk if that means maybe he doesn't feel the same? I could be taking this season too personally, but how would I ever know that?
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/26 01:25 AM
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