pottsyOSL Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	Seems I am heading towards divorce, what to expect? A lot depends on where you live (country, region/state, etc.) for how the divorce will be. As for life afterwards, it can seem scary but most people find their way through and see the light afterwards	/r/Divorce_Men	28/07/26 11:59 PM
7	My wife (32F) told me (44M) she wants to separate — 30 hours after the kids and I joined her in Spain It’s brutal man, and Im sure it hurts to hear but she’s almost certainly acted on this crush. And most likely whoever she met is in Spain and these rarely work out. So don’t stay there unless YOU want to, all other considerations are just enablers for her inevitably doomed exit-fling.	/r/Divorce_Men	11/07/26 05:12 AM
9	I don’t feel like communicating with my Ex….is this common? It's normal. You'll likely have to deal with her for a wedding or important birthday etc. so just be aware that it doesn't end forever, but then if you have no ill will you'll be fine	/r/Divorce_Men	17/06/26 11:55 AM
3	How do I deal with this rage The best line of philosophy I ever heard was: "The opposite of love is not anger, it's indifference". What's good about this is when you're angry and want revenge you know focus on getting to indifference, as the best form of revenge. Once you get to indifference, well you don't care any more anyway so what does it all matter? It's ok to feel hurt, hate, anger and whatever else, just keep in mind the end goal is not giving a fuck and moving on. Last point - 99% of the time this "oh I have moved …	/r/Divorce_Men	04/06/26 12:08 PM
1	The part of single fatherhood I didn’t see coming Invest in time savers. I got a robot vaccuum, an instant pot / air fryer and buy groceries online for home delivery. I do meal prep when I don't have the kids and freeze it, or set a timer on one-pot instant pot meals. Honestly the cost of these things is worth it - online groceries forces you to plan ahead for meals and then you don't buy dumb impulse food. My last advice here - if you do free up time don't just allocate that purely to the kids. I carve out time for myself to go running. It mak…	/r/Divorce_Men	02/06/26 11:51 AM
2	Ex proudly claims life is so much easier / better now You control one thing, and one thing only in this life - how you react. You can't guarentee what happens to you, what other people do or say, how the world is, what happens in the universe, the weather, the price of petrol, random outcomes - none of that. But you can control how you react. Your ex is actively trying to influence how you react, but it's the one thing you can stop happening. Besides that perspective - how great is her life really? No job so no sense of achievement or fulfillment, …	/r/Divorce_Men	02/06/26 11:34 AM
25	An unexpected benefit… Several years of hearing about this daily hour of laundry only to find out it’s an hour a week and she’s been doing fuck all for years.	/r/Divorce_Men	30/11/24 11:59 AM
9	I am convinced that not even once for a second has she considered that what she is doing is wrong You are not her, and no longer are you both a "we". So let her do and be who she wants to be. It’s not your concern any more. What is your concern is you and your well being. You have value, and you mean something to this world, to others and to yourself. These 4.30am thoughts are not you either. Think of it this way: you can observe that you had the thought, and if you can do that you are something other than the thought - find out who that is and love him. I’m not usually philosophical but the…	/r/Divorce_Men	14/11/24 11:15 AM
14	Am I an asshole for saying this: My STBX is the same. Wanted to keep living together and play out a happy family fantasy "for the sake of the kids". She trashed our entire time together and said it was at best "ok". Thing is either she means that which is no basis for a friendship or (as I actually suspect) she doesn’t and again, no basis to be friends. It’s all horseshit to mitigate a feeling of guilt about ending the marriage a few months after I survived cancer. Don’t fall for this shit unless you actually want to be friends…	/r/Divorce_Men	14/11/24 08:04 AM
7	The hardest part It’s up to you (and her) if you wanna share those moments or not. I’ve no illusions and it drives me nuts being around my STBX but I accept being together as a “family” for important events. Yeah it’s not the same but the kids are happier and that’s what matters to me - and based on family being all you ever wanted I guess that applies to you. I have a similar situation as you. The divorce is as ‘easy’ as it could be. But don’t let that fool you into anything. It’ll get harder at points and you …	/r/Divorce_Men	26/10/24 12:16 PM
1	Here to Help: Free Gym Advice for Divorcing Men I’m not much into gym, always been a cardio person. Right now I have a BMI around 24.7 with a muffin too and elsewise skinny. Not so bothered about getting ripped but lean and toned would be great - any advice?	/r/Divorce_Men	05/10/24 05:40 PM