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puabookworm Archive

View 1 post and 160 comments by puabookworm on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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puabookworm/r/seduction14/02/16 12:12 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Sorry if it came across condescendingly! I can see you already know where to improve, and I agree with your entire response here. You're right that it's mostly for other people reading hahah. But the main point I wanted to make is that the same behavior you need for a successful relationship, you can also use to be successful at pickup/seduction. You don't have to switch modes is what I'm saying (not necessarily for you, just for people reading in general)
/r/seduction01/10/16 04:00 AM
2

It's alarming to me how you're the only person saying this. The basic principles of game don't change once you get into a relationship (unless there are massive issues with your game that only become apparent later).
/r/seduction30/09/16 11:19 PM
1

Men look at relationships as the goal, the finish line Men usually look at sex as the goal, don't they? The only ones that look at relationships as the goal are the needy ones that can't handle being single. Guys think the hard part is over... The hunt is over. Agreed. Now she's gaming you. She's looking to qualify you. Doesn't she do this from the moment you meet her? Girls are typically picky about who they date and who they go home with. This isn't something that suddenly begins once you star…
/r/seduction30/09/16 11:13 PM
3

I think you've done a great job of figuring out where you need to improve, but I don't think these things are only important for relationships- If you approach seduction correctly, you shouldn't need to change anything when you get into a relationship. It's just that if you're doing things wrong, it sometimes doesn't become obvious until later in the relationship. ...I broke up with her after 3 months of dating for reasons I didn't exactly know why. Be more self-reflective, be sure of your decis…
/r/seduction30/09/16 11:06 PM
3

Every number or date you get honestly has a really low chance of actually progressing into anything long-term, so don't sweat it when something messes it up. Gotta keep that abundant mindset.
/r/seduction30/09/16 08:35 PM
2

If he was just using the party as bait then you're absolutely right. Using it as bait is absolutely a mistake, for the reasons you mention (commits to one plan, and if he cancels it makes him seem overeagar) I assumed (possibly incorrectly) that he was actually planning on going to this party. Personally, if I'm going to a party tonight, I'm not going to cancel my plans because a girl I just met has suggested she'd rather stay in, so it's OK that I'm making myself seem booked (because I am booke…
/r/seduction29/09/16 07:19 PM
1

.. You can use emojis on Reddit? What is this sorcery?!
/r/seduction29/09/16 06:58 PM
2

Lower your expectations for yourself- Your first time having sex is gonna be pretty lame, find a way to laugh about it and not make it a big deal. Lower your expectations for the woman- She doesn't need you to be amazing. Women meet a ton of creepy guys every day, all she wants is for you to be normal and a little above average. She doesn't care if you're perfect. Think of every experience as just that- Experience. You're not going out to try to succeed, you're going out to try to learn. Every e…
/r/seduction28/09/16 09:49 PM
1

I don't mean to shoot down your advice, as it's all very good advice, but I think the real reason he didn't get the number in this particular case is that he didn't ask for her number.
/r/seduction28/09/16 09:44 PM
2

I think the party idea was fine (actually, I think it was great- Having a concrete plan for your first meeting drastically reduces flaking), but when she said no he should've transitioned to something like "Aah fair enough. Well we'll hang out another time then, let's trade phone numbers".
/r/seduction28/09/16 09:41 PM
3

Why are we critiquing the compliments? She seemed interested, was asking questions, and didn't even directly reject him at the end- I think the issue here is that he didn't press for at least a number at the end. Not to say the compliments were perfect, but I think that's not the real issue here.
/r/seduction28/09/16 09:40 PM
1

I think having a concrete plan for either when you're going to hang out, or what you're going to do, is an excellent strategy to decrease flakes. When she said no to the party, he could've transitioned to a different day/idea instead (or switched to the general "Well let's do something some time"), but I don't think suggesting the party was a mistake.
/r/seduction28/09/16 09:39 PM
1

I'm not sure why everyone is critiquing your choice of compliments or conversation topic. She was clearly interested (to some degree) and you said what came naturally to you. Really, the only problem is that you didn't press for a hangout on a different day or a number close after she said she was busy.
/r/seduction28/09/16 09:36 PM
1

Why are you still trying with the same girl? Why aren't you trying with other girls? There's nothing wrong with trying again after an awkward first encounter, but the real question here is why you feel the need to keep trying with the same girl. If you don't have an abundance of options in your life, you're going to give off a needy/desperate vibe and shoot yourself in the foot.
/r/seduction28/09/16 09:33 PM
2

Well-written story! Keeping in mind that this subreddit is mostly about trying to have sex with girls the same night we meet them, and your story is about a guy you've lived with for months and talk to every night.. I think there is still some good learning to be had here! For any sedditors reading, be sure to identify which parts of this story you would need to do differently for a girl you've just met, as compared to this story where they've been flirting for months. ..his ability to keep the …
/r/seduction28/09/16 09:31 PM
5

Don't try to hold long conversations with girls. Go in with no expectations, talk to everyone, be friendly and social, and make your goal to just practice talking to girls, not to actually get laid (at least for now). If you go in with the mindset of "I'm lonely, I want to get laid, please like me" you're going to come off as desperate and the girls are not going to be interested. If you go in with the mindset of "I'm just here to be social and have fun and chat with people", girls will enjoy ta…
/r/seduction28/09/16 08:53 PM
2

what signs or giveaways you should look for to see if a girl wants you to approach her None, usually. Yeah, sometimes a girl will make eye contact with you and smile and play with her hair, but usually the girl hasn't even noticed you yet. Just approach her, say hi, and if she seems uncomfortable back off. If anything, instead of looking for signs she's interested, you should just keep moving forward (Approach, flirt, start being physical, ask her out) until you get a sign that she's NOT interes…
/r/seduction11/06/16 11:15 PM
7

Have you heard of the concept of "abundance"? Having an "abundance mindset" means realizing there are tons of girls available to you, and helps you be less nervous and needy- If things go badly with the girl you're interested in, there's more options. How this manifests for me is: When I'm at the bar talking to a cute girl, I can be confident and crack jokes and don't feel very nervous, because at any point if it goes badly I know there are other girls in the bar. Or, if not, I know there are ot…
/r/seduction03/06/16 05:14 PM
1

You said: ...to me OP is clearly saying rejection is in the mind of the beholder. I said: ...Maybe you don't consider these "rejections", which is a good way to look at it Do you see how we're actually saying the same thing? That's why I repeated it.
/r/seduction20/05/16 04:23 AM
1

Right, like I said at the end of my previous comment: Maybe you don't consider these "rejections", which is a good way to look at it, but be careful not to mislead the newer guys. I'm just making sure guys that are new to game don't think there's a way to make every girl always say yes.
/r/seduction20/05/16 03:54 AM
2

Pickup is a learning experience. Young or old, if someone's just starting pickup, then them doing mass-approaches is better than doing no approaches. As you start to improve, mass approaching becomes impossible anyways, because you start to find yourself spending a lot more time in each interaction. Among the various goals like "Don't be needy", "Be confident", etc., I think "Have longer interactions" is a good goal to present to newer guys.
/r/seduction04/05/16 12:49 AM
10

You said Except that some of us don't get rejected. But now you're saying I don't get rejection further than maybe being brushed off... But in the case of a woman "rejecting me" in this case, I wouldn't feel rejected at all... You do get rejected, you just don't mind. That's a good thing! You should have said that. People disagreeing with you are confused about your style because you lied in your first post and said you never got rejected. This post clears things up a bit.
/r/seduction03/05/16 11:16 PM
11

In any interaction with a woman there's going to be a point at which you can be rejected or accepted. You can't avoid these things. When you walk up and talk to her, that's a point at which you can be rejected or accepted. It doesn't matter how awesome you are- Maybe she's having a shitty day, maybe her friends are there and she's busy. When you escalate things with her and let her know you're attracted to her, that's another opportunity to be rejected or accepted. Maybe you notice she's not rea…
/r/seduction03/05/16 11:04 PM
1

I know I'm not the awesomest guy to walk the earth How can you change that? You can't expect other people to think you're awesome if you don't think you're awesome. (And I don't mean literally. Sure, there's 6 billion people on the planet, there's someone out there cooler than you. You know what I mean).
/r/seduction03/05/16 10:16 PM
1

A lot of people are getting hung up on the part about rejection. It's not that rejection is something to go out and seek- It's that when it does happen, you might as well laugh about it rather than letting it get you down. Have some fun with it. Even if you approach a girl and it goes really badly, find something to laugh about. It's called the "game", not the "work". It should be fun. Additionally, when you take on a "value-giving" mindset instead of trying to 'get' the girl, a rejection doesn'…
/r/seduction03/05/16 08:38 PM
11

..don't get rejected... because we don't put ourselves out there. Right.
/r/seduction03/05/16 08:34 PM
5

I think the key is to be results oriented, but also not let it phase you when you do get rejected. The reason that people keep repeating that "rejection is good for you" is because there's so many guys out there that are too scared to approach at all, and a few rejections helps them realize it doesn't need to be so scary. Rejection isn't something that intermediate/advanced guys need, but it's important for ultra-hardcase beginners.
/r/seduction03/05/16 08:27 PM
1

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Contrast_effect
/r/seduction30/04/16 07:16 PM
2

Perceptions would include things like our 5 senses, our emotions, our states of arousal- Basically things that we experience. Logic isn't something we experience, it's a tool that we use. You don't ask "What's the opposite of logic?", much like you don't ask "What's the opposite of sight?". Those are tools you use to perceive, and it's only perceptions that are based in opposites.
/r/seduction29/04/16 08:04 PM
3

Logic is not something you perceive, it's a tool that you use to make sense of what you perceive. It's not that everything in the universe has an opposite, it's that our perceptions and feelings (5 senses, emotions, states of arousal, etc.) are based on opposites (Which is scientifically correct.)
/r/seduction29/04/16 08:03 PM
2

Last time I went out (yesterday), I can clearly remember a couple of times a girl was showing interest and I failed to escalate. Thinking back over the course of the last several weeks, I can probably identify like 6-8 times this happened. Also other opportunities where a girl showed interest, I went to talk to my friends or something thinking "I'll go back to her later", but totally lost track of her. I don't feel like a "little bitch" though, because both last night and over the past several w…
/r/seduction23/04/16 09:40 PM
2

When that hypothetical attractive girl approaches you, how do you know she isn't there with friends? When you approach a group of people, they don't know if you're on your own or with friends. Instead of 'scouting around', just talk to everybody! Chat with guys, chat with couples, chat with older people. It becomes a lot less weird to approach an attractive girl if you've just been talking to everyone all night. It also decreases your anxiety about it because there's no decision-making, you just…
/r/seduction14/04/16 07:09 PM
6

...and interjecting myself into other peoples night... ...waiting for your first social prey I totally agree that with that mindset, it's really hard to approach people. In fact, when I used to feel that way, I felt really guilty about approaching and it really deterred me. Here's what I did to change my mindset: If you were at a bar with your friends and a really hot girl came and "interjected herself into your night", would you feel inconvenienced? If you were at a bar and someone interrupted …
/r/seduction14/04/16 06:22 PM
1

I'm just not convinced that your confidence and mindset haven't been affected by this, especially all the rejections. I know getting rejected a lot can really take a toll on someone's confidence. I'm definitely not saying that it doesn't matter it all. It definitely does. There's going to be a certain % of women that are going to be totally disinterested in you based on this. It's a matter of developing yourself in other areas and focusing on the % of women that can still be attracted to you bas…
/r/seduction20/03/16 05:35 PM
1

Inexperienced guys tend to wait until the signs are VERY obvious before they make a move, because they're scared of rejection. Be obvious, lots of physical flirting.
/r/seduction20/03/16 01:14 PM
2

What's the downside to following up?
/r/seduction20/03/16 01:12 PM
3

Maybe she had a hard day at work. Maybe you look like some other guy she knows. Maybe she has a bad experience with an abusive ex. Maybe she was hangry (hungry + angry). There's a million reasons she could've been pissed off that have nothing to do with you. Also, tangent: Wanting to sleep with a girl doesn't make you a creep- It's normal! They want to sleep with guys too! What makes someone a creep is seeking validation and trying to be nice as a way to "earn" sex.
/r/seduction20/03/16 01:12 PM
1

Assuming it's the age range you're looking for, university campuses are great. In general if you're going to commit time to day-game, you need to go somewhere with high volume. Malls are great too, always lots of people walking around. I like bus stops / busses / subways because since I already have a reason to be there, there's less pressure. If I chat with the girl and it turns out she has a boyfriend.. Well, I was on my way to work anyways, it's not like I wasted any time. And don't forget th…
/r/seduction20/03/16 01:08 PM
1

No matter how fit you get, there's always room for improvement. No matter how motivated you become, there's always room for improvement. No matter how much you study and learn, there's always room for improvement. No matter how much you improve, you're never done improving. So don't focus on whether you're "good" or not, focus on whether you're actively improving or not. Don't self-identify as "the fat guy". Self-identify as "the guy that goes to the gym twice a week and is cutting fast food fro…
/r/seduction20/03/16 01:04 PM
5

Say hi, chat about anything, say "I'm getting off at the next stop but you actually seem pretty cool, we should totally grab a coffee or something some time!", to which she'll say yes, to which you say "OK, I'll text you and we can figure out the details, what's your number?"
/r/seduction20/03/16 12:58 PM
1

Just be congruent. If you really don't care, then that's fine. If you're feeling kinda annoyed about having a broken bone, be honest about that. Also, non-game related and just logistically speaking, make sure not to over-exert if that'll slow the healing! I was super sick last week and pushed myself to go out multiple nights anyways and ended up taking forever to recover, when I probably should've just taken a day to rest.
/r/seduction20/03/16 12:54 PM
2

If you believe "I am unattractive and girls don't like me", when you approach a girl, it's going to cause you to be less confident, less direct, more needy, and more approval-seeking. If you believe "I am a sex god and girls are lucky for me to even be talking to them", when you approach a girl, it's going to cause you to have confidence, be direct, not give a shit how they respond, and not seek their approval at all. Physically attractive guys get laid more. Some of this is because they're attr…
/r/seduction20/03/16 12:50 PM
8

Never before have I read so many words that say so little.
/r/seduction15/03/16 11:19 PM
3

Different methods work for different people. There's not one exact method that works for 100% of people- If there was, we wouldn't need communities like this, we could just all follow that exact blueprint and be good to go. Plus, in some cases, both pieces might be true for the same people. In daygame if the girl is busy, an insta-date isn't possible: You have to go for the number. On the other hand, if she's not busy, getting her number and not going for the insta-date seems like a wasted oppor…
/r/seduction15/03/16 11:17 PM
3

You can build comfort/rapport, that's about it. You can do a bit of teasing too but it's really easy for things to be misconstrued over text. I'd prefer something like snapchat where you can just send each other random pictures and not have to worry about having this logical text conversation.
/r/seduction14/03/16 07:49 AM
2

"Hey if I don't ask this I will be regretting it for the rest of the day. Can I take a picture with you?" When in doubt, just be honest! Good job!
/r/seduction12/03/16 07:33 PM
1

What this comes down to is comfort. The reason women will say they need a few dates before they'll have sex with someone is because they need to feel comfortable with them. In college you already have some pre-established comfort/trust just from the fact that you're in the same school (or even if you're not, just the fact that you're both experiencing the same challenges in life). If you live on campus you probably see the same people a lot so there's some familiarity. It's only natural it's be …
/r/seduction12/03/16 07:09 PM
2

Nobody goes out four times and pulls. You have to go out a lot more and get a lot more reference experiences, then you'll start to see where you're having problems. Our generic advice isn't going to do much for you. I also tend to avoid girls in groups with guy friends. Why? Just go up and chat with them and be friendly. Game the group, game the guys, ask how they all know each other.
/r/seduction12/03/16 06:51 PM
3

Awesome tips! It's important to not seem like you have an agenda, but don't forget to show intent! The girl has to know you're actually interested in her. There's nothing weird/wrong about being sexually interested in someone, you just want to play it off like you just randomly noticed her as opposed to it being this cold calculated approach. Impose a false time constraint. These include "Hey I have to go soon but ..." Show you are living your life and aren't there just to game her. This is huge…
/r/seduction12/03/16 01:31 AM
1

Hahah OK! Thanks for the tip.
/r/seduction06/03/16 11:40 PM
2

I guess I just don't like walking up to girls like "Hey, are you having fun? Can I have some of the fun?" and would rather approach the girl like "Hey, I'm having fun! Want to join the party?" Anyways, it's all about the results in the end- As long as you're happy with your results, keep doing what you're doing!
/r/seduction06/03/16 06:01 PM
2

As someone that used to have really bad approach anxiety, the advice "just push through it" wouldn't have helped me. Maybe I was a real hard case, but I think it's usually good to offer some steps besides "just do it". You're absolutely right that there's no magic answer, though!
/r/seduction06/03/16 06:14 AM
16

You're right. I approach girls because I want to, because I enjoy improving their night and showing them a good time. Basically, I try to always leave the other person better than I found them. Coming in with that mindset, rather than a "what can I get out of this" mindset has helped me improve my results a lot.
/r/seduction06/03/16 06:12 AM
1

Just make your first line: "Hey, random question, how old are you?" if you're worried.
/r/seduction05/03/16 11:43 PM
2

People that are working are being paid to be nice to you, so don't assume them smiling or waving means anything at all. That being said, go for it. Your line seems fine.
/r/seduction05/03/16 11:20 PM
103

Not to seem like I'm totally missing the point, but to add on: Another way to never get rejected is to not have a mindset where you're trying to "take" something from the girl, but rather a mindset where you're going to "give" her a good experience (with you). When I say hi to a girl she she turns the other way, it turns from a rejection to a genuinely confusing moment for me. Like, "Huh, I was just coming up to her to help her have a more fun night and she didn't want me too. That's really weir…
/r/seduction05/03/16 11:10 PM
6

Build momentum before you arrive (talk to people on the street, etc.). Then it won't be as big of a jump to start talking to people in the club. Talk to ANYONE. No excuses. First people you see, talk to them. Is it a couple dudes? I don't care. Is it an ugly girl? I don't care. Noone is "not good enough" for you to talk to. The goal here is to just make it natural for you to approach and talk to anyone in a club environment, and then when you see a hot girl it's not a big leap to talk to her.
/r/seduction05/03/16 05:23 PM
2

If you don't have a high sex drive, and you're not looking for a relationship, what is your intent in going on dates? As long as you're getting what you want, that sounds awesome!
/r/seduction03/03/16 10:56 PM
4

The fact that you're doing approaches at all puts you above 99% of the guys out there. There's room for improvement but that doesn't mean you're bad!
/r/seduction03/03/16 06:02 PM
1

I don't mean to be rude or condescending towards you at all, but it sounds like you're having a rough time and I hope there's some way I can help you out. It sounds like you have a lot of really negative views about women. A man should NOT have to approach women 1000 times (quite literally) just to have sex once. I agree. I approach way less than that and have no problem getting sex. ...manipulative charlatans who want to drag you around as their emotional plaything? I hate manipulative girls! L…
/r/seduction03/03/16 05:58 PM
1

How successful has this been? How often does this actually lead to a date, or to sex?
/r/seduction03/03/16 05:52 PM
7

Abundance mentality, man. Why go for the girl that's bringing up her boyfriend when there are millions of other girls out there that are more available? Also in my experience, girls who want to cheat don't mention their boyfriend until after we have sex.
/r/seduction03/03/16 05:50 PM
1

Well what's the alternative, throw away her number and never message her? What's the downside to messaging her?
/r/seduction03/03/16 05:31 AM
1

Yes. It takes a long time, and it's all about how much you actually practice and put this "stuff" into use. Reading and watching videos isn't going to make you good with girls, actually going out and talking to them will. What specifically did or didnt work for you? Start by working on not thinking of yourself as unlikable. If you don't like yourself, how could anyone else? If there are things about yourself you want to change, then change them.
/r/seduction02/03/16 09:09 PM
4

Lower the bar for what's "good enough" to say. Lower the bar for how "cool" you need to seem. Realize that the girl isn't expecting every single thing you say to be awesome and witty. It's OK to just talk about random nonsense. The actual content of what you're saying really doesn't matter at all. You can basically alternate between building comfort (and getting her to qualify herself to you) and breaking rapport (aka teasing). "Where are you from?" (building comfort), "Newyork? Gross." (breakin…
/r/seduction02/03/16 08:51 PM
1

You need to work on your confidence. You need to think "I'm such an awesome guy that, shitty clothes or not, any girl would be excited to have the chance to see me and talk to me."
/r/seduction25/02/16 09:08 PM
3

Picking up a girl from a bar/club/party and taking her home the same night is way easier than asking a girl to come to your place as a first date. Do that ten times first, then you can work on this step.
/r/seduction25/02/16 08:59 PM
2

I think you missed my point. What I'm saying is that it's OK to do things that are "beta" as long as you don't freak out when you notice yourself doing it. What's an example of something "beta" that you do?
/r/seduction25/02/16 03:29 AM
2

You catch yourself doing something 'bad' and like a kid with its hand in the cookie jar Exactly this. A real alpha doesn't care if he does something "beta".
/r/seduction25/02/16 01:59 AM
1

The only thing that should feel weird to you is dating girls that don't meet your standards. If your standards include a certain level of maturity, that's totally fine. Just don't let yourself fall into the mindset of "I'm creepy if I do _____". Anyways, as others have said, go to a bar. Like you said, it has an age-based barrier to entry.
/r/seduction25/02/16 01:56 AM
2

I love that he even stated that there's an age barrier to get into the bar, but didn't quite make the connection.
/r/seduction25/02/16 01:54 AM
1

If you're worried about it, just ask how old they are. You can tease them regardless of how they answer, it basically becomes a qualifier.
/r/seduction25/02/16 01:51 AM
1

He didn't say "I wanted to ask for her number the whole time but didn't, is that bad?". He said "I thought maybe I should have asked for her number", implying it's something he thought he was supposed to do. A lot of guys feel like if they talk to a girl and don't escalate/close/etc. that they're doing something wrong, whether or not they actually wanted to ask for the number. It's like this annoying task they're supposed to do. If he didn't want to ask for her number, he didn't need to. If he w…
/r/seduction25/02/16 01:46 AM
25

You're terrible, but that's OK. I was terrible when I started too. You wanna know what though? Just the fact that you're trying means you're putting in more effort than 99% of the guys out there. Be proud of yourself for the fact that you're trying. Stop reading PUA stuff and go do approaches, you'll learn WAY more even if it goes terribly. Your goal is not to get laid. Your goal is not to get a kiss. Your goal is not to get a number. Your goal is to go up to the girl, say hi, introduce yourself…
/r/seduction25/02/16 01:43 AM
2

Confidence is sexy. Yes! ... assuming the girl is at least somewhat attracted to you to begin with. Be careful with the phrasing there, it sounds like you're referring to physical attraction. I know what you mean though, and you're right. If you're above-average looks and attire, that will work. Being confident will work better.
/r/seduction25/02/16 01:33 AM
2

That mindset also makes it super easy to take a rejection. When you go in with the mindset of trying to TAKE fun, rejections hurt because you've failed. When you go in with the mindset of trying to GIVE fun, rejections don't hurt because THEY'VE lost out by not letting you give them fun, and you've lost nothing.
/r/seduction21/02/16 12:04 AM
13

Do you do that because you're scared of rejection? Get rejected a few times and you'll start to realize it's not a big deal unless you let it be.
/r/seduction20/02/16 08:01 PM
2

What should I have done differently? Just entirely scrap the movie date? Movie is fine, but you have to approach it the same as any other date. You still have to tease her, build comfort, use kino, etc., not just sit there and actually watch the movie. No weed. Agreed. How to introduce kino in a setting like this? Touch her while you're teasing her, touch her while you reply to her jokes, pretend to be offended and playfully push her away, then forgive her and grab her for a hug. she seems to no…
/r/seduction20/02/16 07:48 PM
2

Much like anything in life, if you spend too much time reading and not much time practicing, you're not going to get better. There's never going to be a moment where you're "ready". Just go try. Then, when you run into problems, come back and read up on the specific thing you're having problems with.
/r/seduction20/02/16 07:37 PM
14

There are two keys to solo game. The first is momentum. From the moment you leave your house, start saying hi to people you pass on the street, if you take a bus ask the driver how his day's going. Chat with people in line. By the time you get inside you should already have built a lot of momentum. The other key is minimizing time between interactions. You don't have friends to fall back to between approaches, so as soon as one conversation ends, start talking to someone else. Lower your standar…
/r/seduction20/02/16 06:08 PM
3

Yeah for sure! The ideal is to do these things without really thinking about them, and it seems like that's what you're doing, so keep it up!
/r/seduction18/02/16 04:42 AM
53

all I had to do was NOT fuck it up. FUCK NO, man! As natural as it might have felt, you actually did so many things right! You should be proud :D She told me ... to "behave" when we met This is a good sign. It means she sees you in a sexual way and knows that's something you'd try. I know that seems trivial but it actually reminded me that she isn't some mystic goddess or whatever and put my nerves at ease. I don't think it's trivial! This is hugely important to keep in mind and was probably why…
/r/seduction18/02/16 01:20 AM
2

What do you think might help in getting him to have the idea himself?
/r/seduction17/02/16 11:05 PM
1

Cuz only reason a girl cheats is cause her current relationship is boring/shit Weird, I always assumed people cheated because they were shitty people that don't know how to end a relationship that they're not happy in.
/r/seduction17/02/16 09:04 PM
6

What you said was: Grab her body, pull her to you, kiss her, rub her crotch, sit her up and take off her shirt Another way to phrase this would be "I'm touching her all over". Get what I'm saying? His description was a lot less eloquent than yours, but it was so brief and general that it's impossible to know what he meant. You could both be talking about the same thing. Don't make assumptions.
/r/seduction17/02/16 08:28 PM
2

Some girls are more passive and let the guy do more of the work. It doesn't mean he's necessarily being "creepy". You're making some really strong assumptions about him based on a single sentence he wrote ("I'm touching her all over" could mean a lot of different things to different people)
/r/seduction17/02/16 08:12 PM
2

Why would he get irritated at you trying to seduce him? Why isn't he interested in sex as much as he used to be? Have you talked to him about this at all?
/r/seduction17/02/16 08:05 PM
3

That type of reputation will scare off the conservative girls that aren't interested in casual sex. I didn't say it'd scare off the girls that SAY they aren't interested in casual sex, because that covers about 95% of girls :P You're absolutely right about the confidentiality aspect. The best reputation combines the best aspects of being "slutty" and keeping things confidential; the reputation as a guy who is very casual about sex, doesn't see it as a big deal, and therefore has no reason to tal…
/r/seduction17/02/16 08:03 PM
10

Assuming you're interested in having sex with lots of girls on a casual basis, having that reputation is good because it basically pre-screens them. That type of reputation will scare off the conservative girls that aren't interested in casual sex.. And that's great, because it saves you time, as those aren't the girls you're looking for anyways. Assuming you're looking for a relationship with a girl that shares your values, doesn't view sex as that big of a deal, etc., the reputation will simil…
/r/seduction17/02/16 07:43 PM
2

They aren't points to follow at the exclusion of everything else, just things to keep in mind and incorporate. For example one of the points is "Don't criticize, condemn, or complain". I think that's a good one to follow. Being a whiner is a really unattractive quality. Another of the points offers an alternative- "Call attention to peoples' mistakes directly". There's nothing wrong with telling someone they're doing something wrong, just do it in a direct way instead of bitching and complaining…
/r/seduction17/02/16 09:56 AM
8

Almost every point indicates something for you to do/say. Very few of the points indicate to be passive/listen. You might be focusing on a few specific points.
/r/seduction16/02/16 10:02 PM
2

I think we all know that these are good things to do, but it's good to be reminded and to be extra conscious of it.
/r/seduction16/02/16 09:59 PM
1

Thanks dude! I'll definitely give it a read, I appreciate it.
/r/seduction14/02/16 12:59 AM
1

Completely agreed. I really like the way you worded it here: Save the niceties/kind gestures for when you genuinely want to be nice/kind to a person and expect nothing in return Girls don't dislike nice guys. They dislike guys that are needy and expect something in return, which describes most so-called "nice guys". If you're legitimately a really positive and friendly person, feel free to be nice. Compliment girls, say nice things, be friendly as long as it's coming from a genuine place. Girls …
/r/seduction13/02/16 11:49 PM
1

At the very least, I can appreciate your directness. You don't beat around the bush!
/r/seduction13/02/16 11:23 PM
1

That's definitely a good idea, but that alone isn't going to give you a 0% flake rate. If you're using this trick and finding a 0% flake rate, that tells me that you must be very strong in other aspects of game as well.
/r/seduction19/01/16 07:34 PM
1

Different people have different styles. Personally I've never gotten laid from social circles, I've always gotten laid from cold approach. Daygaming to build a social circle sounds pretty awesome, but it doesn't mean daygaming to get laid is a bad thing.
/r/seduction19/01/16 10:43 AM
2

Assuming you built enough attraction before getting the number, they're going to want to meet up with you. When you text them "Hey it's MosesMachineZ" they're going to respond to you. Assuming you didn't build up enough attraction before getting the number, they might not respond to just texting your name. The solution? Build more attraction before getting the number. I find it helpful to plant the seed for the date while getting the number. "Why don't I grab your number so we can grab a coffee …
/r/seduction19/01/16 10:35 AM
0

Every person you know has really good nights and really bad nights. They only talk about the good nights. When people are bragging about banging girls, you're basically getting the highlights reel. You're not hearing about all the shitty times they had because nobody wants to share those. You're not "screwed". There's no ticking timer after which you're never gonna get laid if you haven't already. Work on your confidence and self-esteem, convince yourself you're a person worthy of sex, that's wh…
/r/seduction19/01/16 10:26 AM
1

What do you mean by "months of improvement"? What areas have you improved in?
/r/seduction19/01/16 10:24 AM
1

Yes. And compliance by seeing if she's willing to go to different locations with you in the first place. What a great "trick".
/r/seduction19/01/16 10:21 AM
1

Why does it matter? Just do it and see how it goes.
/r/seduction19/01/16 10:18 AM
1

I'd prefer to go to a club by myself than with one person like that, unless you think it'll be fine to leave him to his own devices while you go off and talk to people.
/r/seduction19/01/16 10:18 AM
2

Your responses to not being with your friends are good. For the caffeine excuse, don't be too clinical, you'll come off as boring and really "safe". Just say something like "I don't need alcohol, I'm already so pumped on a redbull I just slammed! Aaaah!" or something like that. Keep it lighthearted and fun, don't make it sound like you're giving her medical advice. I've definitely used that excuse before (Not that it's really an excuse, because I DO prefer to drink caffeine when clubbing, and it…
/r/seduction20/06/14 07:27 AM
3

Sometimes a girl might be concerned that you're not with friends, because that might mean you don't have any. Sometimes a girl might be concerned that you're not drinking, because for HER she can't let loose and hook up with people without giving herself some kind of excuse, which is often drinking. Several of my female friends have been weired out/expressed concern about me going to clubs alone to pick up girls, or about doing it while sober, but they NEVER find it weird when I'm drunk and/or w…
/r/seduction19/06/14 09:20 PM
0

One aspect of being dominant is being nonresponsive. No matter what other people do or say, you're going to do your thing, and feel how you want to feel. You could be a high energy dominant person, or a low energy dominant person. Your level of energy doesn't matter. If someone else in the group is really high energy, and you react to that by trying to out-do them, that shows that you're beta. You're letting them control how you act. If someone else in the group is really high energy, but you re…
/r/seduction16/03/14 09:34 AM
2

Be having fun. If you're all having fun, girls will assume you're all fun guys. By you having fun, you're showing that these guys are fun to be around. When it comes to actual conversation with girls, help your friends isolate by keeping the attention of whatever girls they're not interested in and being a cool, fun guy.
/r/seduction21/01/14 04:17 AM
2

Treat this as practice. If it goes well, awesome, congrats! If it goes badly, you've learned a lesson for next time! Don't worry too much about whether it goes well or not. (The more you worry about that, the lower your chances)
/r/seduction21/01/14 04:14 AM
5

Warm up by talking to everybody. Guys, unattractive girls, etc. Just be social in general. You need to practice and train yourself up to it. Don't expect to be able to just jump in and be awesome. You can't be good at anything in life without practice.
/r/seduction21/01/14 04:13 AM
1

The only way to help her is to be the emotional crutch and friendzone yourself. Not worth it if you're doing it as a means to get with her.
/r/seduction21/01/14 04:11 AM
1

I don't perform well when drunk or tired. When in a relationship you're having sober sex in the middle of the day. When pulling girls from downtown, you're drunk and it's late. For me, the solution was to stop drinking, and to ask girls to hang out earlier in the day so that we could get down to business before 2AM rolled around and I was too tired to get it up.
/r/seduction17/01/14 09:08 PM
1

Alternatively, just ask regardless. It's really hard to gauge if a girl's interested or nor when you're new. Especially someone who's working and is supposed to act nice to everyone.
/r/seduction14/01/14 01:51 AM
1

Stop overthinking it and just ask her for her number or ask her to coffee or whatever you want to do. It doesn't really matter if you go for the number or ask her to grab coffee.
/r/seduction14/01/14 01:48 AM
13

Make statements instead of asking questions, lead, make decisions. I don't mean to totally take all choice away from her, but if it's something of little consequence (ex. where to eat) and she seems indecisive, just make a choice. Tying into the making statements, helps avoid wasting time on small decisions. Examples: Bad: "Hey do you want to grab lunch today? What do you feel like eating? I'm thinking pizza, is that OK with you? Are you sure that's OK? We don't have to if you don't want to." Go…
/r/seduction09/01/14 11:50 PM
6

You know what you did wrong- She gave you a bunch of chances and you didn't take them because you were nervous. I've been there, it sucks, but in a few years this can be a funny story from your past you tell other guys that are struggling.
/r/seduction08/01/14 07:33 AM
2

When you're chatting someone up, ask them who they're there with and ask them to introduce you to their friends. This prevents situations like this, and helps with logistics if you're trying for a same-night thing. When a situation like this actually happens, eject however you feel most comfortable. Your physical safety is more important than getting off a cool one-liner or looking tough.
/r/seduction07/01/14 05:51 PM
-1

I think since you're part of the group in question you might be taking this a bit personally and missing my point. I didn't say all. I didn't even say most. I just said many.
/r/seduction06/01/14 09:09 PM
1

Not all gay guys, but a lot of them. As someone with a ton of gay friends and gay family friends (since my parents are gay) I think I can safely say that a lot of gay guys are effeminate.
/r/seduction06/01/14 08:09 PM
1

If you're not so great at physical escalation, get better at physical escalation. It's something you need regardless of where you're seducing. In the clubs it happens more rapidly, but you need to be comfortable with it regardless. My nightgame revolves around approaching girls on the street outside of the clubs. I go inside the club to dance with my friends and get amped up, when I'm outside is when I actively approach, since I too rely a lot on my conversation. So, the answer: A good place to …
/r/seduction03/01/14 09:53 AM
1

Awesome! Clubbing's great as long as you don't get too drunk, and as long as you're social with everyone from a really early point (High five random people on the street on your way to the club, chat up everyone regardless of how attractive they are or their gender, etc.)
/r/seduction03/01/14 09:17 AM
2

Depends which club you go to, and when. Venue, Caprice, and Celebrities are big among our demographic, and if you go on a Friday/Saturday there's no shortage of girls to approach, not to mention that you can approach girls on the street outside of the clubs as well (The Granville strip is perfect for this)
/r/seduction03/01/14 09:00 AM
1

Depends what your style is: For day game, a university campus is perfect. Even if you're not a student you're allowed to be there and there are plenty of girls to approach. I've done approaches at UBC and SFU and I've noticed other guys doing the same from time to time. For night game, the nightclubs on the granville strip are great. Venue has lots of girls in your age range. Can't really comment on the other clubs since I've only been to them a couple times each, given that I have friends who w…
/r/seduction03/01/14 06:40 AM
1

In that case, why have many people (including myself) enjoyed one night stands and not felt guilt or anxiety?
/r/seduction02/01/14 11:12 AM
1

Protective instinct. Imagine one of your female friends dating one of these guys you despise. You probably feel somewhat similar, maybe not as extreme.
/r/seduction30/12/13 12:01 AM
1

Different people use different scales. For some people, a 5 is an average. Other people consider a 5 to be ugly, and a 7 to be average. I've even seen some people use a 1 or 2 to describe a girl that looked perfectly average. So, I wouldn't put too much on that.
/r/seduction27/12/13 11:58 PM
2

Well, as long as you keep up with the way you're doing things now, it won't be your last opportunity for sure. Keep it up!
/r/seduction24/12/13 04:08 PM
2

Make sure he's focusing on the process- Tell him that it's not about getting laid tonight, it's just about gradual improvement. Your goal is to talk to girls. There's no intent to actually get a number or get laid or anything like that. This lowers the stress. Then, do what ThrowawayPUA suggests. Approach the girls with him. You open, you say "Hey, meet my friend", you chat a bit, you say "Hey man, tell them about blah blah", just let him get used to it, and it'll be less scary.
/r/seduction24/12/13 09:52 AM
2

She works with your mother? Is this the greatest idea?
/r/seduction24/12/13 09:48 AM
6

I think you had a legitimate opportunity for a threesome in there.
/r/seduction24/12/13 09:44 AM
9

Small talk, conversation staled, you were crazy nervous when asking her, she responded unenthusiastically, you didn't get her number and she didn't offer it. I don't think her age affects how this would have went. My experience with older women doesn't go beyond ten years older, but I haven't seen any major differences, besides things that you can calibrate to once you see them, not things you need to know going in. Treat them like any other woman and qualify for the things you're looking for.
/r/seduction22/12/13 06:52 PM
1

I agree with all of your logic, but I think one of our premises differs For me, it's not the actual act of cheating that I think is bad. It's the fact that someone really wanted to cheat and intended on following through on it that's bad. If a girl wants to cheat, and cheats, that's bad. If a girl wants to cheat, and only doesn't because the guy said no, that's just as bad. At least, to me. I don't want my girlfriend to not cheat on me because she knows she's not allowed to. I want her to not ch…
/r/seduction19/12/13 12:32 PM
2

When two people decide to be in a relationship, they're making an agreement with each other. I'm not a part of that agreement, and it's not my responsibility to uphold it. On the same note, if a girl wants to cheat badly enough, she could just as easily find someone else to cheat with, and the relationship is also in a bad spot that whether or not I facilitate this isn't going to make or break it. I would never recommend chasing after a girl that has a boyfriend- With abundance, why go after som…
/r/seduction18/12/13 05:58 AM
1

Firstly, you don't want to be subtle. You want to be direct. But at the same time, you can't directly say "Hey let's have sex", because that puts her on the spot and also removes her ability to later say that it happened in the moment. Just tell her she should come to your place to hang out, or to have drinks, or something. Girls know what that means, but it leaves her the room to say that "it just happened" after the fact.
/r/seduction13/12/13 12:37 PM
2

You make it sound like you need to pick one. Do both.
/r/seduction12/12/13 12:58 PM
2

If you're enjoying yourself, does it even really matter? Be who you want to be as long as you're having fun. The people who like that sort of attitude will like you, and the others won't. You can't please everyone, so you might as well just do whatever's fun for you. Plus, the fact that you don't care if they find it awkward or not will display confidence to those people that DO like your attitude.
/r/seduction12/12/13 12:53 PM
3

"Thanks, what's your name?" while putting a hand on her waist or something like that; You can get away with being more direct with your touching since she's started off more direct.
/r/seduction10/12/13 09:37 PM
1

If clingy texts bother you, don't respond very often and she'll probably slow down on them. If you don't want a relationship, just let her know that you only want something casual. Honestly, your behavior should be enough to tell her that, but the fact that you took her on a date and didn't have sex with her might have sent her the message that you're looking for something serious. Consider adjusting how you act with future girls so that they get the message without you having to bring it up.
/r/seduction06/12/13 05:31 AM
2

How old are both of you, and how did you meet her?
/r/seduction04/12/13 09:50 AM
2

Yeah, that's what the big-shot PUAs do, and I find myself trying really off-the-wall things for the fun of it when I'm out, but what I really find enjoyment in now is emotionally connecting with girls, and finding common interests for us to talk about. The typical banter and stuff is fun, but it's always the same, so it's cool to actually have an intelligent discussion about something I'm really into, like psychology or food or something.
/r/seduction04/12/13 04:30 AM
5

I guess this means you're not just an emotionless sex machine! I kid. But really. The thrill of random lays is gone, maybe that means you should start upping the qualification process, look for the girls that have really good personalities, that have cool interests, and that you can emotionally connect with. Find girls that you can get excited to hang out with not just because of the sex. Of course, don't compromise on looks or sex either. One of the benefits of being a PUA is that you can have …
/r/seduction04/12/13 01:18 AM
7

I agree completely. What drove me to try to improve was that I wanted to be better with women, but along the way I realized that the larger benefit was just becoming a happier, more well adjusted person, and the women were a side-effect of having a good life and a good outlook And, likewise, it's not about acting, it's about incorporating these things into your actual personality, and not having to worry about turning your game on/off before/after you get the girl, since it's just who you are. I…
/r/seduction01/12/13 01:51 AM
23

Imagine you meet a girl, you like her, you take her home, then the next morning you realize it was an act and she's actually totally different. You'd lose interest. Same goes for her. However you act to get the girl, you need to keep acting that way to keep the girl. So, only use PUA techniques that you're comfortable making a part of who you actually are, and incorporate into all of your relationships. For me, I try to be: Congruent, direct of intent, leading, and outcome independent at all tim…
/r/seduction30/11/13 10:35 PM
2

What do high and low vibrational state mean? Most of what you're saying is pretty cool, but I don't really get that.
/r/seduction26/11/13 10:20 AM
1

You're absolutely right that status is something you can never fully shed, and you're also right that trying to shed it is a good thing. The goal isn't to shed it completely (that's impossible), just to try to reduce it as much as possible so you can maximize your own happiness. I'm trying to work on my inner game and confidence so that I can get to the point where I can just pick girls I find attractive, and not care what other people think. I've made a lot of progress in this area but I still …
/r/seduction24/11/13 02:24 AM
1

For me, if a girl meets my standards for attractiveness, I'm proud to be seen with her, because I'm proud of my standards. You made a good point- If you have high status anyways, who cares what other people think about your standards? If you're truly confident and feel like you're high status, you won't feel uncomfortable being seen with certain people because you won't care what other people think.
/r/seduction23/11/13 02:25 AM
1

I have standards, and if a girl meets my standards, I'm more than happy to be seen with her in public. If you're walking around holding hands in stores with this girl, your relationship is not just sexual. Is it possible she meets your standards for sex, but not your standards for a girlfriend, and you're uncomfortable here because you're doing boyfriend/girlfriend type things with somebody that doesn't meet your standards for a girlfriend?
/r/seduction22/11/13 10:15 AM
2

As you become more secure in yourself and confident, you're going to be choosing girls moreso based on how much you enjoy them rather than the sort of status they'll enable. Besides, once you're embracing this community's values and acting with confidence, you're going to be high status anyways simply because of the confident behaviour you're displaying.
/r/seduction22/11/13 08:02 AM
1

Warning: It's 3AM and I'm hyped up on caffeine and this may be rambly and possibly nonsensical. I agree with you completely. There are things that are basic needs (Food, water, sleep, sex) that can be extremely enjoyable, but at the end of the day aren't going to be as stimulating or fulfilling as higher level needs (creative outlets, social time with friends, etc.). Like seriously, I won't eat in front of the TV because I like to really enjoy the food I'm eating. I LOVE eating. Similarly, I LOV…
/r/seduction19/11/13 10:47 AM
2

Sex is one of those things that when you're not getting it, it seems like the most important thing and it's all you want to work towards, but once you ARE getting it, you'll realize that while it's REALLY fun, it's definitely not the most important thing in life, it doesn't change who you are, and there are plenty of other things that still bring you more enjoyment.
/r/seduction19/11/13 05:27 AM
2

If you have a lot of anxiety about approaching women, it's usually hard to incorporate it into your daily routine, or you'll start making excuses (See a pretty girl at the coffee shop but she's on her phone, or you get scared and then tell yourself she wasn't that pretty anyways, that sort of thing). For that reason, going out with the express intention of getting experience in meeting women is good. It prevents you from making those excuses. Once you have more experience you no longer need to d…
/r/seduction18/11/13 03:42 AM
1

If you say it like you're bragging, or say it with insecurity, definitely bad. If you've just met the person, also bad. If you've known them for a while, been connecting, already slept with them, and answer it in a neutral way that shows you don't really care, then it's not a big deal, at least in my limited experience (Three girls I've answered honestly, in all cases it didn't affect things and we continued to see each other.)
/r/seduction18/11/13 03:36 AM
2

As with any skill in life, it will take effort when you're first learning it, but become a lot more automatic and natural once you've gotten practice at it. Kino progression basically means starting off very non-sexual and slowly progressing to more sexual touching. For example, starting with a high five, then a touch on the shoulder when she says a funny joke, then congratulate her for something with a hug, then put your hand on her lower back, and so on. It's usually good to take things step b…
/r/seduction18/11/13 03:19 AM
2

Drinking water and places with no cover have been said, but keep in mind you can also approach right on the street depending on how much foot traffic there is downtown. You also don't need to restrict yourself to the night, daygame during the week is just as acceptable as daygame during the weekend.
/r/seduction15/11/13 11:52 AM
1

I'm more getting at the generally accepted notion that you shouldn't drink when doing pickup. If I have a much easier and much more fun time of it after a few drinks, should I just keep going along with that, or am I missing the reason why I shouldn't?
/r/seduction12/11/13 02:40 AM
3

Drunk me performs really badly. Sloppy, unaware of social cues, etc. Completely sober me does pretty alright, but he needs warmup sets, is heavily reliant on situational confidence or on social momentum that's been building throughout the night, and had to plow through a lot of blowouts to get any closes. Slightly buzzed me (I'm fairly alcohol tolerant- Tonight it was two beers and a shot) seems to have much easier success, need no warmup, and doesn't have to go on a 30-girl-approach-rampage to …
/r/seduction09/11/13 12:56 PM
3

From an abundance mindset, why would I want my ex-girlfriend?
/r/seduction08/11/13 08:32 AM
7

Next time you see him, say "Hey man, good job with that girl. I don't know why I was so mad, I was really drunk.", and never bring it up again. There are millions of girls out there, this is not the only one that will be interested in you. Take this as a learning experience. Next time you isolate the girl before someone else swoops in and does it. Next time you don't shy away, you stick with her and get her to come with you. Being "first" doesn't mean she's claimed for you.
/r/seduction28/10/13 10:12 AM
1

I think everyone can go into average mode sometimes.
/r/seduction27/10/13 09:36 PM
1

There's a lot of psychology suggesting that we have different mentalities when speaking different languages. Chinese/English bilinguals endorsed more conservative opinions when using chinese, more liberal opinions when using english. So, yes, your charisma and pickup ability should be drastically different between languages. But, if the girl doesn't speak english, your only choices are to use chinese, or to use nothing at all, so I say go for it. Plus with practice you'll start to get the slang …
/r/seduction26/10/13 11:55 AM
1

A group consisting of: Me, a few people I know (guys and girls), and a few people I don't know (Friends of the guys and girls). Don't feel like I can escalate with the new people in front of our mutual friends, but also don't know how to isolate someone I just met when our mutual friends are there. Maybe I'm just more concerned about rejection when it's a friend of a friend, less so when it's a stranger, but advice would be welcome.
/r/seduction26/10/13 11:45 AM
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