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radfemmd Archive

View 5 posts and 54 comments by radfemmd on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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387

I had a girl friend who befriended a man like this. She would constantly make excuses for him and say “he’s harmless!” 😒 he stopped doing this around me when I finally got sick of it and told him “I can’t argue morality with someone who is dead set on not caring. We’re having two completely different conversations, and I’m not entertaining your sad excuse for an ego boost.” He asked why I was getting so emotional, and I ignored him. He just kept talking to fill the air. My girl friend sat there …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 04:40 PM
31

I was in your position last year, and I can only imagine how you’re feeling right now. It can get a little bit lonely at first, but I started taking notice that the more I worked on myself, better people started popping up in my orbit naturally- even during covid. Without even thinking about it, I started doing more things for myself that made me happy and started meeting people (mostly virtually then but now in person) that were at my level. Ive had a few dates and they didn’t work out, but I h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 07:01 PM
31

I was literally just about to say hobosexual alert! 😂 the bar is in hell
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 10:54 PM
28

The only male friends I have are gay. Even gay men need vetting because they are still men at the end of the day, but the gay men in my life are some of the best people I know. I had straight male “friends” in college- even super “woke” ones. They all either ended up wanting to fuck me or got super controlling whenever I got into a relationship (even when I was in romantic relationships with women).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 10:51 PM
338

I hope this guy know that the reason why women were “popping out babies” during the toughest of times in history wasn’t due to women “loving” men at the time. Women didn’t have access to brith control during those times like we do now. Spousal rape wasn’t illegal back then. Women JUST got the rights to their own bank accounts without their husband’s permission about 50 years ago in America. These are just three examples among many that explain why women back then stayed with their husbands and h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 04:44 PM
44

THIS. LVM will view anything that doesn’t center them as misandry 😒
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:22 PM
294

I used the praise the men who made posts like this, and like others have pointed out in the comments, these men almost always secretly got off of the point that THEY were the ones intimidating women. Posts like these are so insidious and manipulative. It tricks women who don’t know better into thinking these men are “safe.” Ladies, a HVM will NEVER post stuff like this. He will be the type of man that does the behind the scenes work without wanting to get praised for it because getting praise is…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:16 PM
3

I’m actually fairly interested in the conservative perspective of FDS. I grew up in a rural Midwestern town, and (like you mentioned) most of my conservative or apolitical friends are actually pretty much in line with feminism and FDS without carrying the label. This may seem like a weird take coming from a pretty far left radical feminist, but I think this expansion and dialogue will be extremely beneficial for women like myself and women like my friends. I should also probably point out that m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 01:05 AM
108

Definitely. I’ve been there plenty of times. The important part is that we’ve learned from our mistakes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 10:08 PM
1

I’ve read through the thread you provided, and I definitely see the “bashing” you mentioned, but I’m also seeing a good amount of support of FDS in the thread as well that reflect a lot of the comments I’ve already made on here. I’m not a separatist and I’ve even said myself that FDS isn’t perfect radical feminism but is great for women who want to date men. I don’t think that’s bashing. I also certainly wouldn’t say Ovarit is fully representative of radical feminism as well. There are plenty of…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 12:00 PM
5

Has anyone been following the Britney conservatorship trial today? I’m so proud of Britney standing up for herself. Her strength is so inspiring!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 10:42 PM
17

I hope my comments haven’t come across as attacking women who like doing these things. If I have offended you, I truly apologize. The point I think is being made (at least on my end) is that the current structure in society tends to reward women who fit into the feminine beauty standards and put down women who don’t. As women, we get treated better when we are attractive and conform to what society sees as “beautiful.” What is seen as beautiful is usually based on men’s preferences. So that is w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 09:46 PM
19

I LOVE THIS! This is exactly what I’ve been saying in my comments on this post (although you’ve definitely conveyed it better and in less words lol), and I hope they have come across that way. It’s never my goal to put anyone down, but I always like to encourage women to think critically about their making and if they’re doing things that they actually want to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 09:32 PM
21

I don’t think it’s dumb to say that our choices aren’t made in a vacuum and adhering to patriarchy beauty standards isn’t “empowering.” I get that some radical feminists have said terrible things about women who perform feminity in the past, but to throw all of radical feminism out due to this is just as ignorant. It’s not misogynistic to question if the decisions that women are making are actually beneficial for women in general. FDS is mostly made up of radical feminist ideologies and encourag…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 07:10 PM
2

I completely understand your feelings on this, and I’m currently working on it myself. It is extremely hard to unlearn all of the socialization and toxic ideologies we’ve been exposed to. The fact that you’re open to change shows how far you have come so please don’t discredit yourself. What has helped me is realizing that my body is just that- a body. My body does so much more than just being a starting point for my appearance. It heals itself when I’m sick. It gives me the energy to move and e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 05:19 PM
11

I really like this take. I had a thought about a connection with liberal feminism but couldn’t put it into words
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 04:51 PM
10

Agreed! I think there’s a certain pressure that women are placed under to be a “perfect” version of whatever they ascribe to, including feminism. None of us are going to be perfect. I know that technically i attribute to my own oppression by wearing makeup and shaving my legs, but right now, that is what I have to do. I would argue that most radical feminists would understand this and not put me down for it, and I think that’s also why most radical feminists support FDS. Is it perfectly feminist…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 03:52 PM
37

The more I sit with this, the more I agree with you (not that I didn’t before of course). You can’t simultaneously benefit from radical feminists’ work and then insinuate in the title of the podcast that radfems are defeatists and do not promote the ideas of FDS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 03:27 PM
20

I actually touched a little bit on this in my above comments, but I can definitely go in depth. I still wear makeup to work and I shave my legs, and I know this is due to the patriarchy. I do not find it “empowering.” I think where radfems differ on this issue basically boils down to theory vs practice. In theory, women should not have to shave their legs and wear makeup to be taken seriously at the work place or even to be able to be considered attractive (although I would argue that women’s wo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 03:14 PM
20

Yes! 👏🏻 I was actually going to recommend The Beauty Myth if asked. That’s what started it all for me too. I agree that women would substantially benefit from this, and I hope more women discover these ideas. However, I respect the mods when they say that this is not their main priority. Like you said, I hope we are still able to share this perspective. I love hearing your story and how learning about this perspective has helped your self-esteem immensely!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 03:04 PM
19

It’s always a good day when there is a Marxist analysis of unpaid female labor
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 02:20 PM
34

Personally, I believe the beauty industry consists of anything that enforces the rigid “beauty standards” of women like the makeup industry, medical “skincare” industry (not necessarily face wash but like facials), shaving, etc. I am not saying that people who participate in this are bad people, and I certainly hope it doesn’t come across that way. What I am saying is that I don’t believe choosing to wear makeup or shaving your legs is as “empowering” as liberal feminists would make you believe.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 02:17 PM
63

Most of the separatist radfems I know still support FDS because they realize complete separation is not the reality for a lot of women at the current time. I myself don’t agree with FDS’s support of the beauty industry (which I believe it definitely is a tool of the patriarchy) but still think this subreddit does more good than harm when it comes to women’s relationships with men. That’s the ultimate goal. Like penelopekitty, the title really had me going “wtf” for a minute, but I’m glad I decid…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 01:48 PM
41

Radfem here! I support FDS and recommend it to any woman I know. I am bisexual and mostly date women now, but I follow this and post due to the fact that I am still open to being with a man if he is the right one. In my opinion, FDS is a radical feminist subreddit for women who are attracted to men. FDS even had a prominent radical feminist scholar on their podcast not too long ago. It was wonderful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 01:21 PM
152

Asked my 23 year old cousin about this just now. He said nine times out of ten these guys want women to see the pictures and think “aww how cute!” He said he doesn’t do it, but guys have told them they’ve gotten more matches doing it because these women think these guys are “safe” for some reason. So in short, just another manipulative tactic to trick women into feeling “safe” enough to sleep with them. Gross 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 03:28 AM
106

Exactly! 👏🏻 she may not recognize it now, but it is a form of emotional/psychological abuse. He’s going to lovebomb her after this and then bring it back up again
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 10:41 PM
239

This is why I always try to tell any woman that will hear me than manipulative men like this WILL play the long game (waiting for sex, marriage, etc) if it means they will get what they want. Eventually women who fall victim to this will end up isolated and dependent on the manipulative POS, and will likely not want to leave due to this and the “sunken cost fallacy.” It’s such a sad situation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 10:37 PM
140

I saw that comment 🤮 Pickmes who participate in the gaslighting of victims are just as terrible.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 10:35 PM
13

I had a “friend” like this in high school/early college. She participated in the gaslighting that occurred with previous exes. I dropped her like a hot potato after I started therapy, and she’s still trying to find her way into my life 10 years later. Thankfully she’s blocked and deleted just like all of the exes, but she’s been harassing my family for information. She’s desperate and insecure just like your old “friend” is too. You’re better off for sure! Therapy gives you amazing tools to lear…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 02:42 PM
52

Men really don’t understand how women can get dates with each other, can they? Maybe it’s because lesbians/bi women don’t approach each other solely with the idea of fucking in mind. Granted, HVM do not do this either, which is why LVM are so salty about having to do the bare minimum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:37 PM
29

Wouldn’t it actually be great if men used those forums to level up in a way that would make them less harmful to women? Unfortunately that’s the exact opposite. Their idea of “leveling up” is doing everything they can to influence men to either assert dominance over women (red pill) or supposedly go their own way (not really) while simultaneously encouraging men to commit acts of violence against women. I believe there are some men who genuinely believe it’s best to avoid women altogether, and I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:30 PM
153

Maybe I’m wrong, but aren’t insults like this a red-pill/PUA tactic? I feel like I read this somewhere. I think the “trick” is to knock the woman down a peg so he has the emotional upper hand. Regardless, it’s disgusting. Beware of men who try to take you down because they’re uncomfortable with your confidence. These men are always insecure abusive scrotes with a victim complex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 03:59 AM
157

I’m always weary to praise men who post this stuff. Like yeah, it’s great that he listens to women and uses his platform to reach a large audience, but is he doing is strictly for his ego or does he actually care if this helps women? Either way, I’m glad this thread allowed women reply to share their experiences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 12:42 AM
148

Took the words right out of my mouth. You are the company you keep.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 12:39 AM
111

It’s always so infuriating how men like this get to profit off their sexual abuse of women both while the abuse is occurring and after the abuse. These women have to live with the trauma for the rest of their lives while he gets to rake in money from rape sympathizers and apologists. It’s truly tragic. I feel so horrible for the victims.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 06:12 PM
111

I love reading about other women’s level ups! I currently started therapy again after moving to a new place. My therapist is great! I also restarted my meteorology hobby by joining a local female weather watchers group. It feels good to be out again!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/21 02:51 PM
15

My answer is a little different than the others mentioned here, but my pickme days were just my low self-esteem in action. I thought very poorly of myself at the time and thought being the “cool girl” (aka girl with no standards) would bring me the validation from men that I thought I needed at the time. I of course got a lot of attention from LVM, and a ton of the low effort dates you mentioned above followed. I thought that I might as well accept these dates so men will like me and give me the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/21 02:42 PM
58

There are HVM out there that view sex as a way of connecting with someone instead of viewing it as a means to an end. They are hard to find, but the wait is worth it. The sex is better too honestly because they are focused on the connection and making sure you feel good as well. I’m so happy to hear you’re making your needs and desires a priority! The wait will be worth it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 05:32 PM
90

I’m starting to believe that there’s a correlation between abusive “relationships” like this and addiction. I don’t know the studies to back it up (if there are any), but this is eerily similar to the addicts that I worked with during my social worker days. Does anyone else see this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 06:02 PM
14

LVM tend to stick together in situations like this even if they know you’re right. What they tell you means nothing If they’re not going to call him out on it. As for your female friend, not taking sides really is taking a side. She’s showing she’s okay with rhetoric like that. I hope she understands that agreeing with him isn’t going to make him stand up for her if something similar would happen to her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 11:23 AM
7

The amount of times I’ve heard my grandma say “If I’m wrong, then I’m wrong. God knows my heart” 🙄 I think God would probably want you to report the child abuse to CPS rather than keep the peace… or at least not chastise me for reporting it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 11:21 AM
22

I am so sorry that you did not have someone defending you while you were being abused by your brother. I hope you have been able to leave that situation and find some peace.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 11:29 PM
13

YES
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 11:21 PM
28

Yes, sometimes playing the long game is extremely important, especially for safety purposes. I definitely waited until I was 100% financially independent from my family before I started fully speaking out and burning some bridges. Unfortunately, most of the abusive men have passed away in my family, and most of the women in my family are still standing up for them because “they don’t want to disrespect the dead” 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 11:20 PM
89

I feel like there are a lot of women in our position. Unfortunately, some women play right into the hands of the gaslighting that occurs in the name of “keeping the peace.” In reality, it’s not keeping the peace at all. They just don’t want to deal with the necessary consequences of standing up for other women. Breaking the cycle of abuse can definitely be a lonely road, but it is worth it in the end. You are guaranteeing that you will not end up in a similar situation. The vetting process you w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 07:55 PM
14

This. Absolutely
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 03:48 PM
9

I think it was someone on Twitter quoting that podcast actually!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 03:48 PM
341

I read somewhere that if a man asks you for help, you should run away from the situation because men hardly ever ask women for help for anything unless they want to manipulate/hurt her. They used Ted Bundy as an example lol. I’m not sure how true that statement is, but my guess is that you saved yourself some trouble by saying no to that man regardless!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 01:40 PM
160

Women in the alt-right represent a different side liberal feminism’s failures. Instead of insinuating that random casual sex is “empowering,” they believe that being a part of a culture that encourages traditionalism (the supposed antithesis of liberal feminism) is “empowering.” Notice how their “empowerment” still primarily benefits men? That’s not an accident.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 01:34 PM
8

He did just that. He destroyed her self-esteem so much that in some twisted way she thinks she deserves this type of “love”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 01:28 PM
9

Who wants to bet that her stupid ass husband is fat, ugly, and balding? It’s always some bullshit projection with these scrotes. Even if he’s not, he’s obviously worthless in this marriage and wants to bring her down to gaslight her into thinking she can’t do any better. I hope she eventually gets the courage to leave his ass and take him for everything he’s worth 👏🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 01:26 PM
153

Any man that’s worth having will be completely understanding and supportive of you having your own separate finances. Men who take your financial independence as a personal threat are likely the same men who will want to keep you under his thumb!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 04:31 PM
83

I wish I would have read this about a decade ago when I was in a relationship with a “spiritual” guy who had convinced me that all of my problems could be fixed with “natural” cures. Turns out I had lupus! I’m all for holistic medicine, but I really needed medical intervention at the time. I decided to trust him instead of my gut feelings, and it ended up with me being sick and stuck in an abusive relationship for several years. I’ve come to realize over time that he “loved” me the most when I w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 03:16 PM
158

Every guy who has told me he’s a “dom” is also the same man that has mentioned how it should be okay to hit women when the topic of feminism is brought up. It’s definitely not a coincidence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 02:09 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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