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View 2 posts and 103 comments by rhz10 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
27

Question For Womenrhz10/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/24 02:49 AM
1

Conversationrhz10/r/seduction24/08/25 04:49 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
–

Sure. The whole issue came up for me when she mentioned how she had this period in her life a long time ago where she met guys primarily for sex. I don't know for how long or how many guys were involved.
/r/seduction24/08/25 05:43 AM
–

Obviously, I will do this, but it's only part of the story as those standard tests, while very important, are actually limited in scope when it comes to certain (common) STI's.
/r/seduction24/08/25 05:39 AM
2

Appreciate the response.
/r/seduction24/08/25 05:26 AM
1

Appreciate your perspective. There's another aspect to this. STI's--including those not normally part of a regular set of STI tests--are far more likely in someone who has been extremely sexually active.
/r/seduction24/08/25 05:17 AM
2

In a particular situation I'm facing now, it's either medium or high. Her recent relationships seemed to be long term (not completely clear though) but there was a seemingly earlier recreational sex period for her and I don't know how long it lasted or how many men were involved. How would one discern this in your experience?
/r/seduction24/08/25 05:01 AM
5

It's (mostly) that simple. You've answered your own question.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/25 07:15 PM
3

This is absolutely false -- at least in California. There are guidelines for temporary and permanent spousal support. Differences in income between the two parties can easily trigger an order for temporary spousal support spanning half the duration of the marriage (60/40 rule). Marriages lasting more than ten years are called "long-term" marriages where lifetime spousal support is even possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 12:05 AM
1

It doesn't have to be called that. It may be referred to as looking for "generous, provider-types." Such language is extremely common in women's OLD profiles.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:01 PM
1

Ultimately, it's fine. Someone who prioritizes excitement and displays of effort over actually getting to know someone is a hard pass for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 07:33 PM
1

I have definitely been told that a coffee date is unacceptable. It was during our first phone call. (It was our last.). Also, I periodically encounter women's online dating profiles that say they don't go on coffee dates. It's not a majority, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 03:05 PM
1

I think that this is an accurate take on things. The real question, then, is how men can best manage their desperation/thirst. How do men, en-masse, stop seeking validation from women?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 04:43 PM
6

username checks out
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/25 07:27 PM
7

I don't mind self-promotion, as long as it's transparent. I'll check it out.
/r/seduction01/04/25 03:24 PM
1

Men, when they do date, can have self-respect and filter out those women who see them primarily as an instant ATM, handyman, chauffeur, entertainer, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 02:51 PM
20

There are additional factors. In particular, there is less social stigma for women: -not having children -having children and raising them solo -having short-term sexual liaisons as desired. -initiating conversations/connections with strangers (as opposed to men--which are more likely to be viewed with suspicion). As you hinted at, women are generally more adept at getting their social needs met through family and friends. When taken in aggregate, the kind of man who could persuade a woman to co…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 05:03 PM
1

These things are first-tier non-negotiables--necessary, but far from sufficient, particularly in dating markets where women enjoy more optionality than men.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/25 08:11 PM
1

I'll check it out. Thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 06:54 PM
4

commits 90-99% of sex crimes Can you please provide a reference for this? The National Sexual Violence Resource Center paints quite a different picture: https://www.nsvrc.org/statistics
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 06:45 PM
1

Sex is undoubtedly a key motivator for men to enter into relationships. And yes, if men have alternative access to sex, that could reduce incentive for guys to pursue committed relationships. However, excluding various forms of pay-to-play, that is not what we’ve got today. Deriving one’s worth from having access to sex is a form of neediness. Seeking a romantic partner to satisfy all of one’s social/companionship requirements is another form of neediness. Because so much rides on getting a roma…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 04:15 PM
–

If men's sense of self worth were to become less coupled to the level of success they achieve romantically, several things could happen. Men's participation in the sexual marketplace is effortful. To the extent that men continue to engage in that marketplace, they may decide to be more selective about who they (attempt to) spend their time with and how to expend their effort more wisely. A woman's value, in their eyes, may revert to something more realistic since they could vet such a woman on t…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 01:08 AM
–

Right. That whole saying "Women are the gate-keepers of sex, and men are the gate-keepers of relationships." is really off. Except for a very small number of absolute top-tier men, women gate-keep both.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 06:32 PM
–

One of the most truthful posts on this topic I've ever seen here. I don't blame women for taking advantage of the improved situation they find themselves in. Men would undoubtedly do the same thing if they could. That's just human nature. As is, women can do anything they want in terms of sex and romance and still get what they want later on as well. This point is under-appreciated. I have seen women well into their 50's who enjoy very significant optionality. The overwhelming majority of men ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 06:21 PM
2

I'm out. In every one of your responses, you've reinterpreted what I've said to suit your own narrative. You're fully entitled to your beliefs.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 11:21 PM
0

Of course men and women are able to understand what integrity is and act out of integrity. Ultimately, I revert to my personal experience, which is no more or less valid than that of anyone else. The place where I've seen women act the most with "integrity" is at my work. Maybe such women naturally prioritize that sort of integrity, maybe some see it as an expectation given a male-dominated work environment. However, the place where I've seen women act (and act definitively) the most in response…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 10:51 PM
0

As I said, some (and only some) men hold themselves to standards of what we commonly refer to as "integrity." Certainly, there are both men and women who display integrity, but I do believe it is held internally in a different way. I think both men and women view strong expressions of male some types of emotion (especially certain forms of vulnerability) in a negative light. And definitely, men's emotional state can influence their behavior. For those men who value integrity, such standards can …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 08:44 PM
4

In answering this question, I think it's important to ask "accountable to what?" and what value structures drive decisions. There are always exceptions, but my experience has been that men are accountable to a set of norms or principles they hold for themselves. If those principles are honesty, fairness, generosity, such a man may be said to have "integrity." If those principles are deception, dishonesty, or manipulation, etc such a man may be said to lack integrity. The analog for integrity in …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:45 PM
3

On aggregate, men's optionality is far, far lower than that of women. The reality is that most women are not interested in most men. This can easily give rise to a scarcity mindset for men. So when a woman comes along who shows even mild interest in the average guy, it's highly unusual for him (it may happen after dozens and dozens of rejections). OP's point, I believe, is to resist the temptation to overly invest in someone you've just met since allowing scarcity to drive the interaction doesn'…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:13 PM
16

This is always what I thought-while criminality itself isn’t necessarily attractive, many of the attendant personality components present in criminals are. Thanks for your honest, thoughtful response to a question that often generates defensiveness.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/25 12:25 PM
6

Singling out one gender for bad behavior generally exhibited by both genders--isn't that a little ... eh ... deceptive?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 09:35 PM
2

I'm older than you, but my experience in the Bay Area very much mirrors yours.
/r/seduction04/03/25 01:47 PM
0

What a shock!!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/25 02:56 AM
–

dating women is way harder. What a shock!!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 05:04 PM
3

Excellent post with useful, actionable tips. Thanks, OP!
/r/seduction24/02/25 07:36 PM
2

Nobody enters a relationship without the expectation to receive something of value that is hard to get outside of a relationship. While what is considered "valuable" can vary from person to person, it does seem that there are general trends according to gender. Men on aggregate value sex and companionship. Women on aggregate value protection and provision. Such value systems can be explained in biological and, to a lesser extent, in cultural terms.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 09:17 PM
3

This. OP is just a troll.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 04:29 PM
2

Probably location dependent, but my return on investment is extremely low. With a thoughtful profile (indicating my interests, personality, and vision for a relationship as well as including clear photos) and personalized openers that show I've read their profile, maybe two matches per month, but only if I send many, many messages. I'm in the SF Bay Area, which is probably one of the least favorable locations for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 11:35 PM
1

Agreed. This is borderline trolling and does nothing constructive for this subreddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 05:05 AM
1

40% of my income went to my ex-wife for years after divorce (no children involved) as she continued graduate school and training--gaining income earning potential for herself that the "couple" would pay for while only she would benefit from. For such a scenario, this is standard practice in California.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 04:43 PM
14

I think that a less extreme version of 5 plays a significant role, especially in light of social changes prompted by technology and women's greater independence. Men with poor optionality (which, more than in previous generations, I'd say is the de facto situation for many/most men) may invest heavily in the few opportunities that come their way. This can take the form of intensely catering to the wants of a woman that shows even a little interest in them. It can also explain a particular focus …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 04:47 PM
3

The real question is to how this truly gets off the ground in practice. How can men, who have historically turned to romantic relationships to get their needs for intimacy and companionship met, get those needs met adequately outside such relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/25 07:04 PM
1

I'll let you answer your own question. :-|
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 04:19 PM
1

What makes you say that?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 04:18 PM
9

This is consistent with what I have seen anecdotally—many women well into their 50s/60s can absolutely have a long line of suitors. And, these are women who look their age. Their suitors definitely include men interested in serious relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/25 03:14 PM
5

That's probably true. For both men and women, many of our tendencies are expressed without our conscious awareness. It's not like women go around saying: "Wow, now this is a chance for a truly hypergamous relationship." Such a prospect may simply be viewed as "attractive." You're probably right that women would jump at the chance to be with the man of their dreams. My point is that those dreams can be fulfilled by an ever smaller proportion of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 12:38 AM
17

I also think this analysis is basically correct, but I wonder about the impact recent trends observed in many wealthy countries has on SMV. For example, on aggregate, women in the west are far more educated, wealthy, and socially free than just a few decades ago. If a woman is earning six figures and seeks to date up (e.g., to a man earning seven figures), this phenomena effectively lowers the SMV of men earning six figures. In this Pew Research study, far fewer single women are interested in da…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/24 05:58 PM
1

I should have been more specific regarding what I meant by "traditionally." I was referring to the last century or two. Are you suggesting that, having had some success in breaking patriarchy, most women today are fine with sharing high status men or that monogamy as an institution is just an attempt by men to brainwash women into mating with lower status men?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 05:54 PM
3

Completely agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 04:19 PM
11

This is true. It is sometimes said the women are the gatekeepers of sex, and men are the gatekeepers of relationships. I actually think women gate-keep both (and for reasons beyond sex often being a necessary condition to progress on to a relationship).
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 04:01 PM
0

This is correct. It's interesting that social movements seem to have caused a strong reversion to these more primal behaviors. While traditionally women have been the ones pushing for monogamy and marriage, this has had the effect of bringing more men into relationships than what we're seeing today.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 03:56 PM
15

The bar set by many women is exceedingly high. This is for a variety of societal reasons that center around the fact that women are better equipped to get all of their needs met without a relationship (high earning women can provide for themselves; if they don't want a kid, that's been mostly normalized; if do they want a kid--single parenthood is widely accepted; if they want companionship, women tend to be more social and are viewed with less suspicion than men; if they want sex, that's easy, …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 03:49 PM
2

This is a valid point, but so is women's strong desire to date/marry up. Perfect equality is a nice idea as a concept but doesn't seem to be in our nature as a species.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 03:39 PM
42

It actually goes beyond this. Even for high earning women, a man is expected to earn more and should be more educated.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 03:35 PM
14

Agree with this list possibly aside from non-judgmental and open-minded. If you don't fall exactly into many/all of the other categories you've listed, you'll discover in a hurry how judgmental and rigid people around here can be. It sometimes feels like a kind of left-wing version of MAGA. You might want to add to the list "casual dress, not focused on appearance"
/r/seduction11/11/24 08:53 PM
2

Really, this is at the heart of the issue. Things would look quite differently if men were better able to restrain their sex drive.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/24 06:26 AM
3

This is the main issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 09:54 PM
27

As the average standards men achieve rise, so will the bar against which they are scrutinized.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 09:35 PM
4

I suppose. As a guy, you can seek to improve primarily for your own benefit. If you do enter a relationship, you could try to be a good partner, taking on _reasonable_ feedback without getting too invested in the level of intense and continual scrutiny you will inevitably be subjected to (this is the breeding ground for new icks). Or, you can just say "I'm out" and try to get your needs met in other ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 03:27 PM
1

I think "icks" are tiered. The ones mentioned by OP are "first tier" icks. If nothing egregious is uncovered, you simply graduate to scrutiny for next level icks, which become more personal, more esoteric, and more highly dependent on time, her mood and the situation. I will say that when it comes to "being too emotional," this can be tricky. Women often say they want someone who will be vulnerable with them but don't always seem to like it when it happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 03:16 PM
3

It's human nature to want it all. It makes sense that women will seek out those traits they find attractive whether rooted in traditional masculinity or feminist ideals about how a man should behave. It all depends on what suits them in any given context (e.g., a man should pay because he's the man AND he should be an equal partner when it comes to decision making because it's 2024). In a lopsided dating market that strongly favors the average woman over the average man, wanting your cake and ea…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 03:07 PM
1

Did she thank you for paying for dinner and drinks?
/r/TheRedPill08/10/24 07:38 PM
2

Excellent summary.
/r/seduction08/10/24 05:14 PM
2

Thanks. Such behavior is not natural for me. I've pushed myself to be like this at the beginning of a relationship, and it definitely increased her attraction for me. As time went on, I stopped, and she left. Seems like a lot of effort to constantly push oneself to do things that don't come naturally to you.
/r/seduction03/10/24 09:18 PM
1

In cases were this develops into a relationship, do you continue this behavior?
/r/seduction03/10/24 05:11 PM
1

Hmm. I wonder whether men or women are downvoting you ... And, are you being downvoted about the list or the 80% comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 12:25 AM
34

Absolutely true. The real question is how to naturally arouse desire in women.
/r/seduction02/10/24 04:15 PM
0

This is a great response because I can imagine these qualities being attractive to many men.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/24 09:20 PM
2

This is absolutely true. Most men have very limited optionality. There is often a significant amount of work that precedes meeting someone (countless OLD initiations, date planning, money, etc.) and advancing the interaction to the point where a relationship can even be considered. This can induce a scarcity mentality that clouds judgement. While having their own set of concerns, women generally do not experience this particular problem to the extent that men do. I have learned the hard way that…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 07:23 PM
2

While extremely important for a successful relationship, I don't think that bearing and demeanor generate visceral attraction (but can generate repulsion).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/24 07:05 PM
5

Really? And if we substituted men for some racial group? Say someone was the victim of a crime committed by a person from a particular racial group. Would going around saying "I hate all _____" be OK?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/24 05:49 PM
2

Not only on IG or TikTok. I have seen this language quite regularly in women's OLD profiles (over a wide range of ages). It is often accompanied by a list of requirements regarding a potential partner and rarely accompanied by anything they would offer (aside from their presence).
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 06:14 PM
2

Among other things, this is why it's very important to have a strong father figure while growing up.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 05:46 PM
–

This is true. Curious to know which "manosphere pundits" offer information you consider to be good.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/24 11:42 PM
4

Most likely explanation.
/r/seduction27/08/24 03:47 PM
–

it really goes beyond this -- men are judged almost exclusively (by everyone--men and women) through the lens of performance.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 03:55 PM
8

If you’re not a catch, this illustrates my point more dramatically.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 10:29 PM
12

One success out of five attempts are odds that most men can only dream about.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 07:31 PM
–

I have found this to be absolutely true and well beyond 30's. In contrast to guys their age, I have heard multiple stories of (average looking) women in their 50's having an abundant dating life with high-quality men. For these women, after having had kids and living an independent life, the bar a man must meet for a serious relationship is extremely high (since they have no need for a man to raise a family or to provide for them).
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/24 02:18 AM
2

It is truly unfortunate that the US promotes a system where the state is so deeply entwined with people's relationship choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/24 08:27 PM
–

Great list. Thank you for sharing.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/24 12:55 AM
2

While, strictly speaking, it's outside the scope of my original request, would you be willing to share some of your standards?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/24 04:15 AM
13

Wonderful response. Thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/24 03:12 AM
1

I can't speak for other men. For myself, instagram model looks are not a priority. The purpose of my question was genuine curiosity, not to demonstrate that anyone is delusional. Everyone is perfectly free to set their standards as they wish without judgement. It's unfortunate that, while my question has been downvoted, so far nobody has actually responded with a direct answer. Maybe I'd get genuine answers if I created a dedicated thread with my question?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/24 02:36 PM
-2

Understood. Again, though, I'd really like to hear from the women on this thread who clearly gave a lot of thought and consideration to their list of standards. Ladies, what are you offering to the men who meet your requirements?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/24 06:53 AM
-1

Exactly. I'm very curious to know what these women offer that would excite and generate enthusiasm in men who meet their standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/24 06:21 AM
3

I think this is correct. The qualities you listed are so viscerally attractive to many women that they seem to outweigh many other negative behaviors.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/24 04:08 PM
1

Even if they respond to your text, there's little to guarantee that they will actually tell you the real reason. I have learned that being able to move on without receiving any kind of explanation or closure is a valuable skill for men.
/r/seduction13/05/24 05:59 AM
4

Depends on the city. Look at San Francisco, for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 04:24 PM
14

Exactly. While it could make you a better partner, being a good person does not generate visceral attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 03:58 PM
1

Would love to hear strategies that OP and others (both women and men) have used to better accept (not actively choose) being alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/24 05:14 AM
4

Perhaps that has to do with women initiating more breakups than men and having a backup plan https://www.cbsnews.com/philadelphia/news/poll-more-than-half-of-women-have-a-plan-b/
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/24 04:55 AM
1

I don't think so, and neither does this guy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WyKhl4zSUSQ&t=152s
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 08:23 PM
3

It's this.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/24 04:38 PM
5

This is consistent with what I've heard from women in their 50's: absolutely no problem attracting interest, including some interest from "quality men."
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/24 03:57 AM
1

Women are better able to get their social and sexual needs satisfied outside a relationship than men are.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/23 10:02 PM
2

But here's the hardest truth that may lead to you being especially angry. It's this truth: the characteristics we generally associate with personal virtue -- kindness, honestly, loyalty, sacrifice, etc -- are basically orthogonal to anything that has to do with attraction I have learned through experience how true this is. It's fine if you value such virtues, but do not expect it to generate any attraction toward you. I think this can confuse men because they hear women claiming that they want a…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/23 10:08 PM
3

Excellent post. I have a couple of good friends that fit this description quite well and have always admired them. They were like this when I first met them (when we were in our teens/twenties) and are still like this decades later. It almost seems they were born that way. I have never fit this description but would love to embody more of these traits in an authentic (and not performative) way. I think it could be useful to hear your insights into how someone who is not at all naturally like thi…
/r/TheRedPill07/11/23 01:30 AM
1

That's useful. Thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/23 02:29 AM
1

To provide context, roughly how old are you, and where are you located geographically?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/23 02:13 AM
5

Excellent post. While it obviously varies from case to case, would love to get your perspective on the kind of fun that makes a guy a net positive in a woman's life. Also, relationships are not fun 100% of the time, and no one person is fun 100% of the time. So, do you think that it makes sense to limit interaction if you're not feeling fun in the moment (due, for example, to one source of stress or another)? I've found that fun is more likely early on in a relationship where people put their mo…
/r/TheRedPill18/10/23 03:58 PM
2

This is useful. Thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 03:16 PM
1

Interesting perspective, which begs the question as to how one overcomes the fear of being alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 01:02 PM
–

I have the impression (at least in the SF Bay Area, where I live) that tapping a woman who doesn't know you on the arm while she's walking in the street would be viewed as borderline sexual assault.
/r/seduction15/12/20 05:17 PM
–

Great posts. I'd love to read a Part 0 focusing on the approach/dating app communication phase.
/r/seduction05/12/20 08:07 AM
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