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rosephase Archive

View 1 posts and 5,288 comments by rosephase on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

rosephase/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/20 07:36 PM
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 5,288 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
5

So they are people you know you can count on and know you will go out of your way for. I'm not sure why you are saying you don't have friends. Not leaning on them unless it's important is still having people you trust to be there for you when it is important. And that you are willing to be there if they even ask... so much so you all don't ask much because it's so clear that you matter so much to each other that it would feel like a obligation. That's intimacy. You trust each other and take care…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:41 PM
6

You wouldn't talk to them about hard stuff at work and expect them to listen? You wouldn't ask them to help you move? You wouldn't throw a party and ask them to bring drinks? And if they did any of those things you would be uncomfortable? I get asking for help or support sounds scary to some dudes.... but it really is a normal thing that most people do most days. It doesn't have to be "hold me while I cry" it can be "hey do you know a mechanic you trust"
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:23 PM
5

You wouldn't go to any of your friends if you needed help or support? You don't know anything about each others lives? I mean... you can create intimacy by spending a lot of time together and doign stuff together as well. But that normally results on people you can count on and know stuff about.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:12 PM
12

For me a friend doesn't have to be someone you hang out with one on one a lot. But it does have to be someone you actually talk to about your life and actually listen about theirs. Friendship is a level of intimacy. You can be fine a polite to people you work with or share a hobby with while not knowing anything about each other. For me a friend is someone you would turn to if you needed help. Not every friend is the prefect fit for every kind of help. But if you wouldn't reach out to this woman…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:02 PM
14

I don’t find people who like who I am by lying. I also don’t talk about my weight, ‘body count’, debt or abortions with people I’ve just met. People don’t lie to protect your feelings. They lie because they don’t want to deal with your feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 05:08 PM
4

How do these women you approach know you are intelligent and left leaning? Have you tried making friend and community in leftist circles? Volunteer? Protests? In order for people to know you are smart and thoughtful around politics takes time. That’s not something you can portray in a dating profile or just asking someone out.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 05:56 PM
9

In your journal? Maybe work through some of these things on your own, with your friends or your age cohort before bringing it to this messy place full of upset men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:41 AM
12

Is it a discussion? It just sounds like a random thought you had.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:32 AM
40

Do you know what debate means? This is very much some 19 year old stuff here.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:28 AM
8

You told women to get a gun and carry it. Something that statistically makes them much less safe and much more anxious. Thats' way different then "don't get sloshed around strangers" which is way safer then carrying a gun for protection.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 10:29 PM
8

Carrying a firearm increases risk of someone getting shot. No way for it not to. I don't know about you but I don't want to kill someone. And I don't want to suddenly hand someone a way to kill me. And I don't want to be in a situation where my gun has suddenly made the whole thing a lot more scary for a person who is holding a gun. The statistics are real. Living your life in fear of something that rarely happens is useless. Being scared day to day and not trusting people doesn't do anything bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:40 PM
8

Great. I'll keep thinking you are delusional out of fear because you really want to control something you don't get any say over. Teach women to carry guns, now all women are safe. Thank god you were here to tell them how dumb they are for getting killed.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:22 PM
10

Yeah, you are making excuses for killers right now. It's super easy to make excuses.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:09 PM
11

It's so easy from the outside to tell someone else how to leave. But it's really unkind to assume that women just aren't smart enough to do it safely. Leaving an abusive relationship is an extremely volatile time and women get killed in that time. There isn't a fully safe way to do it. And you can't know how it feels. It's just egotistical to think women just aren't handling it correctly and that's why they end up abused or dead. It's wishful thinking that there are easy safe answers and it's ju…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:01 PM
7

abusive relationships are hard to leave. People get stuck in awful patterns. Mutual abuse is stupid hard to sort out. I hope your sister and her partner can get away from each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 06:56 PM
19

Leaving is when your the most likely to be killed. Not leaving is a survival instinct. Even if you don't think it's a good one.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 06:53 PM
22

Women are harmed by the men they are in relationships with much much more often then by a stranger. Living a paranoid life full of fear doesn't protect you. A gun is only going to make any situation more dangerous and deadly. You think it's stranger danger when it's husbands, fathers, intimate partners that kill and beat women the vast majority of the time. You are living in a fantasy land. Where the harm to women can be prevented by being carful in parking lots. And by calling women idiots for …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 06:49 PM
–

Lots of women stop dating men who don’t have clean adult living situation and standards. Lots of women will stop dating men if they don’t give a fuck about her sexual pleasure. It’s often women with the goal of marriage (over anything else like a healthy mutual relationship) that end up with losers who don’t know how to be adults and aren’t good in bed and have no interest in becoming good. Marriage is a shit motivation. And women are trying to remind each other of that. But it doesn’t work on a…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 07:15 PM
12

I want to have sex with men. When I’m sexually attracted to a dude I want to have tons of sex with him. So it’s clearly not the defining characteristic of need to actually like a person to be attracted to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 03:00 AM
16

From lusting after strangers? Don’t know. Just not wired that way. Never have been. Why do you lust after people you know nothing about?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 02:45 AM
16

I don't lust after strangers. I have to know someone and really like and admire and enjoy them. Then I lust after them as long as they are in a pretty large range, which "average" very much is in. Bald, short, big, harry are all smoking hot when he is amazing to talk to and enjoyable to be around.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 01:49 AM
6

You are profoundly ignorant about your own ideology. https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-64125045
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 07:57 PM
10

The goal of the redpill is to make money off of boys. None of those dudes give a shit about what they say to do it. The ‘women owe you sex’ is just a part of making 12 year olds angry enough to keep clicking.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 07:00 PM
10

Which men? When? Not any redpill jerks who need to be told that women don’t owe you sex. So I’m not sure who you think you are talking to.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:47 PM
9

What is so small and inconsequential? Famous Men getting rich by propagating the idea that women owe men sex? It’s pretty consequential to women. Or do you mean it’s inconsequential that all these dudes bitch and moan because someone once told them to be nice to women and they are forever butt hurt about how unfair it all is?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:45 PM
14

Go for it. None of you redpill dudes do any of that shit any way. And yet it hasn't stopped their whining.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:28 PM
13

I think it's funny that you think this isn't already happening. And it hasn't helped men not be whiny at all about not being owed sex. You understand that the reason men are told these things is because they are not doing them. Not because they are. Men who need to be told that have never been the men who are working to support women.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:25 PM
14

As a feminist who loves drunk sex you are making shit up. Getting consent, for a first time, while drunk is risky for both people. In my consent talks I tell people to always check in with a sober version of each other to make sure this is something you both want, not just now, but for how it works in your life.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:58 AM
1

Okay find me one person doing man hating content that has anywhere near the viewership of any of the popular manospher guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 11:33 PM
2

The issue of redpill content is very much real. The gender war is not. Because one side is being made up for easy hate clicks from kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:34 PM
3

Are you a popular male influencer? No? No cash for you. Just lies to get you to hate the gender you want to fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:30 PM
2

You said they were more responsible for this then ‘any man’ You are just back peddling.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:09 PM
1

The gender war isn’t real. It’s a money making scam. The class war is real. And you can address that and how it can relate to gender without making all this dumb hateful content anything other then a mean cash grab by men who do not care what their impact is on these boys.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:09 PM
3

You are brainwashed. It’s crazy how these dumb men have confused adult males. At least the kids are young. The strawman of these women that were made up to make you keep clicking isn’t even very convincing. It’s just telling you that your right and she hates all men because you felt bad about an interaction with a woman. It’s so easy to lie to these men. And these dudes do it for a lot of money.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:07 PM
-1

When one side is wildly popular and pointed at very young boys I think you can, in fact, point out that it is the issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:04 PM
3

You blamed radfems. And there are simply WAY more, way more popular men teaching hate to boys. Feminism isn’t hating men. It’s not one side of a gender war. It’s cultural criticism. The real issue of the ‘gender war’ is its only being taught on one side by middle aged men to boys by lying about women and feminism.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:52 PM
2

Not true. But even if it was Tate is just one of a dozen dudes who have millions of followers directly lying about what feminism is and what it teaches. So that boys will think this gender war bullshit is real. When they are being taught to hate women. And feminists are studying cultural structure.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:50 PM
2

But they are a huge deal. There are so many of them. And their audience is so young. And they simply lie about feminism. So many redpill dudes think this is an equal thing. That feminism is also teaching women to hate men… but it’s not. While the manospher is very much teaching men to hate women.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:47 PM
4

How so? Also I’m not talking about one man. I am talking about dozens of popular male influencers and 1000s of unpopular copy cats rage bating boys into hating women before they have even kissed one.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:43 PM
2

Will you admit it’s not the same amount of fault of ‘radfems’ as any man? Because if you can admit that male influencers made this mess I’m happy to point out women who are adding to it. But this is redpill bullshit. Boys are fed this mess and end up hating women before they are even sexually mature. It deeply harms men.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:41 PM
3

Sure. Point out one ‘radfem’ that has anywhere near the following of Andrew Tate, fresh and fit or whatever hateful trash is insanely popular with 13 year olds right now.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:34 PM
-1

The ‘gender war’ is a hallucination from hatful male content creators pointed at boys to young to have fully formed brains. The only war is the class war. Every person who falls into hating a gender is being fooled and ripped away from their comrades. What should my ‘side’ do for the ‘other side’? Remind them that they are being lied to and divided. What do I want from the ‘other side’? To treat people, regardless of gender, as people who have value that isn’t attached to their ability to fuck o…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:26 PM
–

How old are you? Do you have any women friends? It kinda sounds like you are deciding before you know any women what they are like. And deciding it’s all hopeless because some dude on the internet told you so.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 09:43 PM
15

You understand that it is going to take collaboration with all genders to actually address the issues you point out? Women aren’t your competition. They are your comrades in the fight against the system that oppresses you both. You let your hatred towards women dived you from your allies. Which is exactly what the folks fucking men over want. For us all to be divided by gender. By race. By nationality. It’s really effective on redpill dudes because they are so deeply hateful and it’s easier to m…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 06:12 PM
21

Good. I can't tell you how annoying it is to have men come up and offer to help me With My Job. Like dude, I'm paid to do this, what makes you think I want help? Men offering women help, unasked for and unneeded, is almost always paternalistic sexism. I only really see people offering up their seat on public transit for older people or people with a lot of bags or a small kid. Gender doesn't seem to have the much to do with it. I actually see young women jump up more frequently when someone who …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 06:03 PM
9

Feminism really doesn’t. Honestly you are fed such lies by manospher folks it’s wild. When is the last time you’ve been in a classroom that is teaching feminist theory? When is the last time you went to a conference talking about feminism? When is the last time you watched any feminist content in good faith? That wasn’t handed to you by people who hate feminism? You let non feminists tell you who feminists are.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 07:43 PM
4

You are talking to someone who is very against circumcision. Like a lot of feminists are. Women were also getting forcibly sterilized in the 70s. In the US. I agree that forced sterilization is eugenics and morally bankrupt. I also think women have been forced into it a lot more frequently then men world wide. But that is just a guess. But the idea that this satire is proof that all feminists are nasty evil man haters who want to do eugenics on all men is just... bad media comprehension. Like a …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:44 PM
10

And yet they are not advocating for men to lose their voting rights. Or advocating for mass enforced involuntary vasectomies for boys.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:37 PM
12

I watched it. It's very clearly satire. She even starts into it with a clip of a dude who talks about controlling women in that same way. All the time before she starts her immodest proposal is about how this level on bodily control is expected and been enforced against women over time. You don't understand 8th grade media comprehension if that isn't extremely clear.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:34 PM
10

A podcast no one has heard of "casually" pushed vasectomy? Come on my guy that's a silly as "hey this clear satire is calling for mandatory vasectomies for all men" As for my flair i thought you pilled guys all understood the difference between gender and sex at this point. But apparently not.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:18 PM
13

Even though they are wildly more popular then your one example of a feminist doing satire you are using as your only example of feminists saying vile things.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:01 PM
10

Okay. And is there any threat of that happening today? Because yeah people have bene sterilized in the past against their will. Women, the vast majority of the time. But that doesn't mean it's happening here and now. Or that this video is actually advocating for it in any real way.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 05:59 PM
3

She has a following as an actress. She believed some dumb shit after a hoax. And I believe she apologized for it. Where is Andrew Tates apology?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 05:50 PM
12

So women should take everything Andrew Tate says or Nick Fuentes or the dudes on the flesh and fit podcast as an active threat? Each of those people has a much larger following then this one person. Are you saying women should take their talking points like women shouldn’t vote or work as a real thing that all men are saying and are plotting? And these dudes are not doing satire.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 05:48 PM
5

You have no proof it’s ever discussed is a serious manor. No one but absolutely crazy eugenicists are suggesting sterilizing children from birth and then testing them back into being able to reproduce. And heads up… if anyone is suggesting this, for real, it’s going to be the women who are sterilized because of course it is. Women bare the load of birth control now and always.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 05:40 PM
2

They are a lot bigger then the one person you are using as reference in this post. Like each of these male influencers is bigger this this one person. Who you are misunderstanding. While the men are actually saying these things. It might be cynically for clicks but they are saying women shouldn’t work, shouldn’t vote, shouldn’t get to choose who to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 05:30 PM
10

When the thing being suggested is literal satire meant to turn your attention to the real issues… yes. Like eating babies wasn’t the issue in a modest proposal. It was intended to shock people and get them to look at the real issues of dehumanizing the poor. This is meant to outrage people who think it’s fine to control women in a way that they are revolted by if it’s suggested we control men in the same way.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 05:23 PM
16

So every woman has all the ‘ammo’ they need to advocate for this legally and yet… none have. Odd.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 05:14 PM
15

Have any young boys been given vasectomies against their wills? Have any legal steps been taken to have this happen? Losing abortion rights is real. Women today are facing it. You are complaining about something that hasn’t happened and has less the zero legal steps made towards it happening.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 05:12 PM
–

Ah so haven't heard that slogan and changed how you feel about believing women. And you are picking women who have very much NOT been believed. And in the case of at least one woman listed had huge expensive smear campaigns against her that still impacts how she is believed even after those campaign have been revealed. Even after all the evidence you are so sure feminists are against. Even then you don't believe. Which is kinda why we needed that slogan. If you are interested in how incorrect yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:37 PM
–

So women need to be dominated and hurt because they have the audacity to ask to be believed in general instead of assumed to be lying around one of the most prominent ways they are harmed through out their lives? And you are upset to be called misogynist? Isn't that what you are? A dude who hates women for being women? A dude who thinks all women are inferior to men? I would think you would wear that label proudly. Considering your intentions are to harm women who speak up.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:26 PM
–

You understand a slogan doesn't change the legal system correct? Feminists say "believe women" because for all the time before they started saying that, women were simply dismissed or silenced if they spoke up about rape or sexual assault. It's not dictating what is right. It's asking for a change in the way of thinking. It does literally nothing to the law which still requires evidence. If you think slogan's dictate what is right I can't imagine how confusing this word is for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:14 PM
–

Win what?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:09 PM
1

My desire for safe sex work has nothing to do with dating apps. I’ve never met a partner off an app. It’s so strange that red pill is so hyper focused on dating and dating in one particular way. Dating isn’t the metric I measure my life by. And dating apps are one very limited and shallow way of dating. Male attention is not the same thing as finding a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 03:13 PM
2

The ‘bargaining power’ of desperate men wanting sex isn’t a nice thing. Dudes who are only getting into a relationship to have sex aren’t the partners women want. If having access to sex makes men not want a relationship? Good! Don’t be in a relationship if that’s your only motivation.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 02:16 PM
8

No. That’s silly. No one is thinking that they are losing power because men can get sex elsewhere. They can pay for it now. Making sex work safe and professional isn’t removing anyone’s partner from the dating pool.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 04:59 AM
1

Right but the amount that is being paid out is already paid in, by the people it’s being paid out to minus the dead folks. The amount going is becomes the amount going out if the government doesn’t steal our social security. Which is keep trying to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 04:40 AM
3

I would be interested in that if you can find a source. Because that hasn’t been the result in places that have legalized it as far as I know.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 04:38 AM
2

We have more then enough money put into the program. The issue is the government taking it out. More humans doesn’t fix that. The old people have paid. It’s their money. The issue is policy not population. But boy howdy does the government love it when people conflate the two.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 01:59 AM
6

That’s the US getting fucked by right wing nut jobs not a population issue. Our government keeps trying to privatize and undermine social security.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 01:31 AM
17

Lots of women and specifically feminists want to legalize and decriminalize sex work. Because it’s being a crime causes so much exploitation and harm. Legal sex work as therapy sounds great! I think most sex positive feminists would absolutely agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 01:28 AM
1

How so? Would having more people get you more retirement money? Because it doesn’t seem like it. In the US that money is the money you put in and saved. The only thing that would give you less of it is the right cannibalizing what remains of our social security.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 01:21 AM
12

God forbid population growth goes down. We will still be more humans on this planet but we can hope that maybe we can curb the exponential growth for nothing but making billionaires into trillionairs and wrecking conditions on this planet for wanted children.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 12:13 AM
6

If you aren't attracted to someone then you aren't being "to picky". It's not "to picky" to expect to be attracted to someone you are in a romantic relationship with. I would say, thats really baseline.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 10:51 PM
4

I don't think being alone is "evil". And I think bad relationships are actually much worse, then no relationship. Lot of people don't have options. Which is why community and friendships are so important to develop no matter what gender you are or what relationships you are in.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 10:47 PM
8

I don't know any men whose dating issues were around being "to picky". Even my dear friend who was casually sleeping with a bunch of women while wanting a relationship and not finding one, eventually found a woman he wanted to build a relationship with. So just the correct amount of picky. Mostly it seems like men have the issue that a lot of women have. Which is not picky enough. Allowing for shit treatment. Stumbling along in a relationship that they just aren't that excited about because they…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 10:42 PM
4

Does this group of people actually exist? Or are they ticktock influencers making content for clicks?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 02:35 AM
4

But transitioning doesn’t change your sexual preference. If a dude is straight and transitions then she is still into women. Honestly I think you are just very young and likely not good and understanding other sexuality. People don’t transition for sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 01:33 AM
11

Do you know anyone who has actually become trans for sex? Because I would argue that transitioning is insanely complex socially and mostly very difficult. Like people don’t do it just for the kick of it. And trans women have even more struggles and less safety dating then cis men.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 01:30 AM
33

As a trans person yourself… do you think it’s real? Become sounds like silly internet garbage for clicks.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 11:48 PM
3

No kids for me ever. So that's not going to be an issue. I guess the questions I run into is why are women being taught to train men to be the way they want them to be, instead of finding men who are the way they want them to be. If you are getting into tons of conflict about how you live together, how you share time and how you share resources.... isn't that just a sign that you aren't compatible with this person? I agree that nagging isn't going to fix incompatibility. But I also don't think o…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/26 08:11 PM
4

My male partner is the clean one. He does most of tidying. I do the deep cleaning once a season. We absolutely agree on cooking being easy and healthy and we both do it. If anything he had to teach me to keep our shared space up to his standards. I don’t think organized clean dudes are that rare. Sometimes I think this teaching a guy to be how you want him to be through femininity is just… not finding the right partner and hoping to change the person instead. But I’m also chill with video games …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 03:25 AM
4

As a woman who is extremely happy in a very different and healthy relationship structure I don't doubt that yours works for some, but I doubt it's the majority. Do you think the majority of women would be content and healthy in a relationship shaped like yours? Are there other relationship dynamics you respect or admire?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 07:47 PM
2

Do you believe that women in radically different looking relationships with radically different acting men can be happy and healthy?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 07:11 PM
2

I think the issue is you are using the label pretty incorrectly. If someone is like that on her own, then she isn't a pick me. She's not performing for the male gaze and female hate on social media. A pick me is a meme and a joke, not a real person who happens to show love by cleaning up after you and cooking for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 07:07 PM
8

That makes sense. What kind of conflict do you see as being caused by the egalitarian model? What are the patterns that pop up?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 07:05 PM
0

Well that's good for you both. I find the whole how to train your man into being this other kinda dude thing, kinda off putting. Do you think this relationship style works best for all women? Or do you think different women are happier in different types of relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 07:02 PM
1

I'm saying "pick mes" are performers on ticktock. They do not do those actions, they post them for clicks. But yes, of course it's easy as hell to get a guy if you happen to be someone who just loves to do those things. but it's also not hard to get a guy if you don't like those things. And it's better to be honest and be yourself in a long term relationship then be performing. I guess a person could try to learn to like house work and cooking? I didn't start enjoying doing the dishes until my 3…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 07:01 PM
3

Do you think all women would be happier in this type of relationship? Or do you think there are different kinds of relationships that work for different women?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:54 PM
1

"pick mes" do X for tikctock views. The term is a very particular one. It's basically a kind of influencer/content creator. You have no idea if they do those things in real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:52 PM
5

Do you believe that women who have different shaped relationships are unhappy? Or do you think the desire for this type of structure is one of many ways women can find rewarding relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:51 PM
1

That's great. Did you meet a guy who was just like that? Or did you do the kind of partner training stuff that red pill women is about?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:48 PM
1

That's a fair point. There are absolutely ways you can work on yourself that are focused on becoming a good partner and someone that a neat person, can like and respect. That kind of work is great. The issue with "pick mes" (and I think they were a joke and then a meme, not really a thing a lot of women are) is it's performative, it's to woo in people with prefect wify energy. It's not how those people actually are. It's how they perform to get attention. Not to say there are zero women out ther…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:44 PM
3

Are you in a relationship? Does it meet your expectations?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:18 PM
4

Out of curiosity do you have a relationship like that? Or are you trying to find a relationship like that?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:18 PM
6

People who act like themselves around the people they are dating end up in more compatible relationship. Which is happier for a lot of people. The issue with creating a personality around getting into a relationship is that once you are in one you don't have a personality any more. And neither you or your partner know who you really are, just what you thought you wanted.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:09 PM
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Hello, I am a woman, I love touching men I am fucking. Love giving head. Get off penetration. Sex is nothing like a massage, I need to have real sexual attraction to enjoy sex. I don't need to be attracted to anyone to enjoy a massage. Debate ended. You are simply wrong trying to lump all women's sexual response together. And the one you went with... is like you've never had sex with a woman who was into you or into the sex. Also men love a cum shot. Are you kidding me? Why is there so much of i…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 06:35 PM
9

If you act like yourself you will end up with a woman who likes who you are. If you don't, you won't. If who you are is an inconsistent uncommitted kinda guy, you will attracted women who have attachment issues. But hey! There are a lot of people with attachment issues. And if you have less then nothing else going for you, at least that is attracting someone. Just someone who is attracted to bad dynamics.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 11:55 PM
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"No" to what? I wasn't saying that men have an easy time finding casual sex. I'm saying that men who do have casual sex are after sex more then a super strong desire or attraction for the woman who is available for sex. Which is pretty much the norm for women having casual sex as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 06:58 PM
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Eh, when I was having casual sex I wasn't really that into the guy. Just looking for sex, which usually wasn't very good because there was no real connection. Wanting some attention and sex isn't some proof of desire for that dude. It's just who is available when you want some sex. It's really not different from men having casual sex. They are after some sex, not this particular person.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 06:53 PM
2

Yep.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 04:31 PM
6

Eh, I have three long term male partners. I understand their sexual minds and their relationship minds and just their minds in general. I know you think you are being insulting but if you are finding poly women or kinky women and men who like cuckolding, who like fucking you. That’s great. Most redpill dudes are to homophobic to do sex to get other men off. I think you are being really progressive to do kink play with men.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 11:02 PM
6

I've been in my current relationships for 20 years, 15 years and 10 years. They are happy stable and bring a ton of love, sex, support, adventure and fun into my world. It's not for everyone. But it's really wonderful for me. I'm great friends with my partner's wife. She's a blast. It sure as hell doesn't feel like cheating but if you feel that way, obviously it's not for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 10:15 PM
8

bad at them. He was doing poly, like me. And tried to start condom free sex without ~any~ conversations around STIs or agreements in any of our other relationships. It didn't seem like he had the level of communication with his wife that I would expect in something stable. He just hadn't put nearly enough thought into kind respectful non monogamy as I want and need in a partner. And as that stuff showed up my sexual attraction faded which made the sex not hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 10:03 PM
11

Mostly relationships. One of them was more hook up shaped but that's because as I got to know how that guy was in sex and relationships I became uninterested in a relationship with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 07:47 PM
20

When I like a guy it’s because I’ve gotten to know him as a friend. I don’t really feel sexual attraction unless I really respect and admire someone. If I’m attracted to a friend and they are compatible with the way I do relationships I ask them out. Or tell them I am attracted to them. Or that I would really like to fuck them. It’s worked like 75% of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 06:19 PM
10

Nope. Not for credit. It was teaching experience. Which is good to get. Prisons don’t expect shit. They barely allow non profits to come in and do good works. Check out the prison university project if you are interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 02:35 AM
14

Yeah agreed. Dudes get so defensive when you point out they only give a shit about other men’s rights when it’s bitching on the internet or coming at feminists.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 01:32 AM
14

Most of them were in grad school at the time. I was. For most semesters it was about 10 hours a week to teach a 2 unit course. That's without the travel time. And yeah, I was working while I did it. I don't know how many people were married or had other support systems. How do you work to support disadvantaged men? How do you put time into mens rights? Or are you just like all these other redpill guys pretending to care when it comes to women's time and energy but not giving a single shit when i…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 12:20 AM
10

I am a feminist. And I worked with other feminists. I use the best examples I have about feminist fighting for men's rights. Which I have done. What have you done with your time and money to help support disadvantaged men? I'm not going to bother explaining why mandatory 50/50 is harmful to both parents and kids of all genders. Because you obviously have no interest in reading what I already wrote and projected a bunch of bullshit on top of it. So... what do you do to help men? How do you put al…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 12:12 AM
16

So people working their job to make a living? No, teaching in prison is not a paying job. It's volunteering. At least through the organization I worked for. Hell I had to pay money to help supply the classes, to get to the prison and I had to organize my labor for money around when I could teach for a semester. How exactly are they advocating for father's rights? That's a great question. Some are lawyers working on changing laws around custody. Some are advocates working with judges to change lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 12:07 AM
11

They are against default 50/50. Which, everyone should be. If someone is abusive then 50/50 is not a good set up. I know it might sound crazy but that helps men. Men need that to be able to get full custody even when a mother is clearly abusive. Also I am feminist, I was working with a feminist organization when I taught college level classes in men's prison. Education is the number one way to lower recidivism. I helped men get college degrees and helped them land jobs once they were paroled. Wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 12:01 AM
5

Friend, write a full thought if you want people to understand you. Yes, that's an organization. What about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 11:47 PM
0

Is that way NOW is against 50/50 custody? Your comment is almost incoherent. So I'm guessing that you are saying that fathers have equal rights currently. But that's just a guess. You didn't leave enough context or write a compete sentence. It's state by state: Worst States for Fathers’ Rights Mississippi Mississippi has been criticized for lacking clear provisions that promote shared parenting. Fathers often face uphill battles in proving their ability to take on equal parenting responsibilitie…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 11:36 PM
52

A lot more women, then men, were teaching with me in men's prisons. I know a lot more women, then men, working on trying to balance out family law and child custody across genders but with particular focus on fathers rights. And all of those women are feminists. I think redpill folks don't know the first thing about feminists and just project whatever they dislike about any women as being "feminist". In all honesty redpill doesn't do shit for men or men's rights because whining on the internet a…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 10:52 PM
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[ Removed by Reddit ]
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:44 PM
4

In healthy relationships people often share a bunch about their past relationships. It's interesting. It helps explain how this person got to be the person you love enough to be in a relationship with. I like knowing all about my partner's past relationships. And I'm happy to share mine. When you love someone you care about their life and growth and experiences. Including their mistakes, failures and explorations. I think when you are secure with yourself and trust the person you are with their …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:13 PM
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I'm not sure where the debate is. You've nailed the kind of thinking that will never allow you to have a happy healthy relationship or even sexual connection. You've won the redpill. congratulations. Now what?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:08 PM
3

The more people you date the easier it is to have bad experiences dating people. With internet dating more people simply get exposed to more people. And people? They often suck. Making for bad dates and bad short relationships and, worse bad long term relationships. Agency doesn’t mean every option is wonderful or works for you. Also, i do not see women saying shitty men will get skipped over. Why would they? You have to get to know someone to figure out how shitty they are. And lots of people a…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 05:52 PM
2

One sentence address bi men.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 03:37 PM
1

Where have I said anything about this only should matter to bi men?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 05:44 AM
2

Sure but at least there is a chance. Don't date conservative or redpill or trad women if you want a feminist. And most men? Really want a feminist. They just hate that it's what they want.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 12:50 AM
4

Sure. That doesn't change that if you want equality in a relationship dating feminists is your best bet. At least feminists are thinking about it. Sure lots of people are hypocrites but most women who expect you to pay and support them aren't feminists and don't identify as such.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 11:29 PM
9

Sure. Absolutely. One is a philosophy, one is a person who identifies with that philosophy. I am a feminist. I am not feminism. Not sure what that adds to your point.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 11:24 PM
12

If you want to not pay for dates or to date women as a bi man, feminists are your best bet. Just because not all women are feminists, and some (rare) vocal (Performative for outrage clicks) women call themselves feminists, doesn't mean feminists are the issue here. If you want a lady with a career who wants to treat you and pay 50/50 you are looking for a feminist. If you want a woman who gets off on you sucking dick you are looking for a sex positive feminist. You all are SO hung up on feminism…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 11:20 PM
3

Well, then find that person and ask her. Because I’ve never met her. And don’t know any women who are that hypocritical. I’m sure they are out there. But you treating it like this is a issue with women. Instead of this one very particular hypocrite, which is sounds like you haven’t actually run into and instead are guessing at.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:56 PM
3

You don't think women shame women for making porn? You have been hiding in some very small corners of the internet if you've never run into women who viscerally hate women who make porn. I think the issue is you are conflating very different women into the same women. Most women who are supportive of women making porn, do not have issues with men who use porn and very likely use porn themsleves. Women who are scared and offended by being approached in public by men trying to date them, very like…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 06:58 PM
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Monogamy isn't really the issue. These exact same things come up in non monogamy and polyamory. The issue isn't how many partners someone has, it's a fucked up culture around ownership and romantic partnership.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 09:43 PM
4

That the advice is out there. Lots of it. People just don’t take the advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 01:26 AM
7

That’s a lot of projection on what I wrote.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 06:28 PM
8

Women often recommend you say ‘no’ to something early on in dating to see how he takes it. Women remind women that if a dude is rude to the service staff you should run. And, it’s actually very easy to tell when someone you spend time with simply hates your gender, even if he thinks your one of the good ones. It’s just sad that some women take that as a complement. Just because you can tell what the advice is to avoid these dudes, doesn’t mean it not out there. Or it’s super subtle. Just think a…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 04:47 PM
2

People avoid getting tested because of stigma. That's the issue. And thy avoid being honest with partners about their sexual risk and sexual past. Because of the stigma that comes with it. All the makes STDs spread. We are barely working on de-stigmatizing STDs in the US. World wide isn't going to give you any impression of what happens when people de-stigmatize STDs. "the main stream narrative" has a HUGE impact. Dude... do you remember the AIDS crisis? No? That level of risk foundationally cha…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 11:52 PM
2

Chlamydia is fully curable. Not sure why that's the one you are so scared of. Feel free not to fuck anyone. It's a perfectly fine response to being so scared of STDs. For people who have a lot of casual sex, it becomes important to understand the risks and how to mitigate them. Stigma actually causes the spread of STDs. So destigmatizing them is best for everyone's health. But if you aren't fucking people then that's also good for everyone's health.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 05:55 PM
3

Infection is just more accurate then disease. It’s not to make it sound less scary. It’s to be more accurate. And people with more knowledge about HIV have access to drugs that prevent getting HIV in the first place. Knowledge really is powerful when it comes to something that is as stigmatized as STIs. Personally I often joke that the worst STI that no one is worried about is the flu or Covid. Which can easily be spread through sex but because it’s also spreads in other ways doesn’t hold the st…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 03:19 PM
14

Smart sex positive folks (so not red pill, but other fun sluts) educate themselves around STIs. Know the risks. Get tested more. The fear and stigma around STIs is mostly due to sex negative culture and lack of knowledge. The reality of them is a lot less scary and a lot more treatable then folks tend to think. Some folks find the benefits are worth the risk.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:15 AM
15

I don't find that to be gendered. assholes come in all genders. Deciding your partner's "no" doesn't matter is not a gendered thing. It's an asshole thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 11:52 PM
24

Same with telling a man no. That's why a lot of women recommend you try setting an easy boundary very early on just to see if a dude can take "no". This doesn't really sound like a gender issue. Just a people issue. Lot of folks don't like to hear "no" and don't think shoving past their partner's "no" is that big of a deal. And that is fucked up. And makes for unhappy people in unhappy and unsafe relationships. But that's just immaturity and a fucked up culture. not women vs men.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 11:50 PM
13

I think most healthy people prefer that the folks they care about and are close to are emotionally intelligent enough and have good enough communication skills to know their own boundaries and express them. I know I feel safer knowing my partner and my friends feel free to say no to something instead of doing it and resenting me for it. I think what you are getting at is a lot shallower then that. Like... when someone is dating a new person they would prefer that the things that they want work w…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 11:41 PM
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Spending power for a trip. Not spending power to become an ex pat and live there. And the women who want to date that guy for his money are going to be incredibly disappointed if they go back to butt fuck Ohio and find out he’s renting an apartment with two dudes and she’s going to need to work under the table if she ever wants to travel back home to see everyone she knows.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 10:13 PM
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Yeah but it’s not where she would be moving back too. So it’s sounds good when rent and medical expenses are also cheap. But when she finds out dude has two roommates in a horrible ugly cold city and she will have to work to still never be able to buy a home… suddenly it’s not worth leaving everything and everyone she knows in a gorgeous country.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:23 PM
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The issue is that your are ignoring rich dudes. Not that you didn’t bring them up. 60k a year can’t afford most dudes the kind of travel it takes to get a passport girlfriend. Unless he’s still living with his mom. You can check out how well that works on any season of 90 day fiancée.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:17 PM
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You know that one of the reasons traveling for girlfriends works? Because guys who can afford that are rich and the women looking for that kind of relationships, one where they leave their culture, family and friends behind, are looking a rich dude. If you use tax payer money to subsidize dating travel you would still be poor. And therefore not that interesting for the women who are dating for money.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 08:58 PM
9

Do men feel indifferent about it? Because that isn't my experience. Some men feel proud. Some men feel over burdened and anxious. Some men really resent their partners for not making an income. I have supported my partner for a couple of years while he was unemployed and under employed. He's done the same for me. We both know that adds stress and work towards lessening that stress in other ways while it's happening. It's rough out there. Being in a relationship should be more support for each of…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 07:30 PM
1

Wow, that ~sucks~. And yeah, it's abuse. A partner trying to make their partner look bad, or insult them or hurt their feelings in general is awful. Doing it socially? In front of their family and community? That's awful.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 09:14 PM
7

I don't know any women who do this in public. I don't do this in private. Belittling a partner is abuse. Pointing out faults publicly is abuse. Like... abusive people suck to be with. Some of those people are women.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 09:05 PM
1

Divorce rates have gone down for the past 20 years. And even then how would you know that divorce is because a woman wasn’t happy because the dude didn’t meet your criteria of a high value man?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/26 04:16 PM
1

How do you?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/26 02:22 AM
3

Ive know hundreds of women. I know dozens of them intimately enough to know if they are happy in a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 11:17 PM
6

Ah, wild gendered speculation that doesn’t hold up when you know more then six women. That’s some good redpill nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 08:41 PM
6

A healthy happy relationship is a prize for both people. A relationship is a dynamic between people. Not trophy one person earns, and the other person is.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 07:49 PM
2

Did you read the STUDY. The one linked in the article. God damn you folks are lazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 04:33 PM
0

Did you read the study linked in the aritcle? It absolutely is adjusting for experience and part time status.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 11:13 PM
6

See this is just reach around for more vibes. You have unrelated information that you are drawing a conclusion from that only you are suggesting. None of these studies are actually make these claims, but it's the people who believe the studies that have bias for believing what they studies actually posit... not you, the person making up what they mean using them in ways they weren't intended. Okay. Sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 10:49 PM
7

So you think how much people are paid is directly linked to how many hours they estimate they work in a day? And that is what makes for a 14% pay gap in women working salary roles in the same companies at men working those same salary roles? Seems like a lot of guessing and vibes that confirm your bias to me. Even in this study that doesn't mention pay the difference between hours worked is 8% so how does that end up equally a 14% difference in pay?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 10:29 PM
5

Show me some stats to back that up and I won't dismiss it. But you are currently doing what you say people do in your own post. there's a pattern where studies about men get widely shared and accepted without anyone questioning the methodology ,because the conclusion already feels right. To me it sounds like "men work more hours for the same work at the same company" just feels right to you, without anything really backing it up. You claim people do this when they have studies that show somethin…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 10:21 PM
5

Women make 7% less than their male counterparts doing the same work for the same company in Denmark and France, and 26% less in Japan. For the U.S., the figure was 14%; in Spain, the gap was slightly smaller at 12%. 14% in the same work in the same companies in the US.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 10:08 PM
0

You are wrong about the gender pay gap. It's been looked at extensively for women doing the same work for the same companies. https://www.forbes.com/sites/iese/2022/12/14/gender-pay-gap-persists-globally-even-for-same-jobs-within-companies/
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 09:49 PM
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Okay cool. I’m a woman. I’m attracted to men. I am very attracted to the men I have sex with. Debate ended.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 01:43 AM
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Yes, you caught us. Female attraction is a myth that females are taught in 5th grade when they separate the sexes to talk about puberty. I have to say it’s a relief to finally get to stop pretending. Whatever you do don’t believe actual women about their lived experience. They can not break the covenant or they will be cursed with only men with the largest and most awful dick for their rest of their lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 01:36 AM
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Just so many of them that all of them shouldn’t be allowed to have access to public restrooms and locker rooms. You agreed that some were ‘harmless’ but not enough so to get basic access to needed facilities.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 11:06 PM
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And you think those people are a danger to be allowed to use restrooms and locker rooms? I had assumed you were just ignorant. Giving you the benefit of the doubt.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 11:01 PM
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Then you are doing fine. You just have a lot of opinions that aren’t based in reality because you don’t know trans people and have been fed a bunch of bullshit about them. That’s a pretty normal spot to be in. And it’s an okay one.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 09:55 PM
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That’s not the situation we are in though. We are in a situation where people use the restrooms that match the gender they look. I live in a place where they are a ton of gender neutral bathrooms. With full length locking stalls and shared sinks. Its not rocket surgery. And an unsafe public restroom is unsafe. A man who is going to wait it a restroom to attack women isn’t going to be very concerned about the label on the outside of the door. Also in most places trans women are incredibly rare. A…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 09:14 PM
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It’s fine for you to think and feel that way. Just don’t be a dick and/or vote to take away other people’s rights and access to public spaces and your fine. Have whatever feels about trans people as you want. You likely don’t know any personally. So your feelings are pretty irrelevant to the trans population as long as you don’t be a dick to them or vote to take away other people’s rights and access to public spaces.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 08:57 PM
1

Around anger? In professional and public contexts, yes. I can choose not to appear angry. It's expected out of my profession, or at least the women in my profession.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/26 01:00 AM
1

I'm not saying you are a loose cannon. I am saying you let your emotions get the best of you and escalated a heightened situation because of your ego. Can you describe why you escalated a situation with a clearly crazy person instead of walking away? What your feelings were? Because I'm not seeing other options for not regulating your emotions when you know nothing positive will come of getting into it with someone who is clearly mentally unwell. But I'm open to hearing from you what it felt lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/26 12:32 AM
9

You keep making it personal because you don’t have any better arguments.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 11:11 PM
3

When someone is clearly crazy and you are in a public setting, yes. It’s your own ego that makes your respond. You could have left. That is real boundary setting. It’s controlling what you will and won’t put up with. You needed to get into it with her to prove something to the people witnessing it and your ego reaction to someone having the audacity to be angry at you in public. It would have been the same if she was a dude other than you might have not had so much ego involved about walking awa…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 10:46 PM
9

Aren’t we? OP decided to get into a fight with a clearly crazy person. Isn’t that losing control? Letting his own ego get in the way of deescalation? Getting mad because some crazy lady had the audacity to be dominating and crazy and feeling the need to Make Sure everyone knows he won’t be dominated? Even when it only makes the situation worse on everyone? Sounds like losing control to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 10:32 PM
8

You feeling the need to dominate a crazy person and prove they aren’t dominating you has a lot more to do about you being male then her being female. You could have walked away but your pride made it so you escalated. Likely because you were affronted by her acting in a dominating or threatening way to you and you feeling like she shouldn’t get away with that because you are more dominant and capable of being more threatening. I think this is more about how you feel about a woman being threateni…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 09:46 PM
5

Women’s emotional strength is why so many women deal with men’s anger in their faces when they don’t have other options. It’s women’s adult emotional regulation skills that mean women walk away if they aren’t required to put up with male anger. It’s dudes being weak and emotionally immature that means they show anger when talking to people who disagree with them. And none of this is all that gendered. Some women yell in conflict. Some men do not tolerate being addressed in emotional immature way…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 08:43 PM
7

A man jumping for joy is demonstrating passion and women arent ‘too weak’ to feel safe around that. An angry dude is simply more of a threat to women then he is to men. It’s not weak to not feel safe around someone who is displaying anger who is larger the you. And I think you’ll find there are plenty of men who do not put up with other men acting visibly anger at them. No one enjoys having someone get emotional when it comes to resolving conflict or understanding a different point of view. And …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 08:26 PM
8

Like calling women weak because they don’t want to deal with male anger? Very patient and understanding of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 08:22 PM
13

Crazy people are crazy. Reacting emotionally to a clearly crazy person is going to be a mess. No matter what the genders involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 07:51 PM
23

As a woman who’s been yelled at by my male bosses and expected to keep calm and deescalation for them, bullshit. I am expected to deal with male anger professionally. If my job isn’t at risk I will walk away. It sucks to have people yell at you. It’s sucks even more if they are physically larger than you and are culturally supported in displaying anger. And still very few people are actually saying don’t get into conflict with women. The results of being angry threatening and yelling are on you.…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 07:45 PM
26

Don’t poke crazy people seems like better advice if you can’t sort out why that happened. It’s not about her gender. It’s engaging with someone who is already being super emotionally reactive. You becoming emotionally reactive doesn’t help anyone and is just going to create a bigger mess.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 07:31 PM
30

If you can’t have a calm conversation about disagreeing points of view, then just skip it. Raising your voice is scary and immature. If you can’t control your emotional reactions like an adult, then don’t expect people to stick around and get yelled at. It’s infantilizing (to yourself) to expect adults to hold space for an adult man like they would for a child throwing a fit. Deescalation and emotional regulation are adult skills. I’m not going to get into complex disagreements with someone with…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 07:05 PM
–

I did read your post. And you use a definition that is pointless and inaccurate. You use transnational as any relationship where people have expectations. And that is an incoherent definition for the way ‘transnational relationship’ is used by the red pill or anyone else. If every last relationship is transactional why have a word for it at all? Wouldn’t ‘relationship’ work?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 07:45 AM
–

Okay. So what does that have to do with anything in your post? Your definition of a transnational relationship is incorrect and incoherent. You are describing a relationship. And the correct term for it is interdependence. Or dependence. Not transactional.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 06:34 AM
3

Sure. Women will be judged either way. So will men to a lesser extent. But judgment isn’t the end all and be all of life. There is no escaping it. Other people will judge you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 04:16 AM
2

Yeah absolutely. The women who get those most credit for motherhood are the people who don’t need the support. Very rich women who have a bunch of kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 02:46 AM
6

I agree that is happening. And maybe as a dude you don’t notice as much but once you are a woman of a certain age, you are expected to have kids. And not having them is met with pity or disdain. Not everyone! Lots of folks get it. It’s just a part of the culture in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 01:38 AM
1

It’s mostly social recognition. And it’s not so much that women who have kids are elevated, but women who don’t have kids are considered less than. Women are supposed to be mothers.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 01:17 AM
21

As someone who is child free by choice the idea that there is no status in being a mother is pretty silly. But otherwise I agree. Even if you want kids the cards are stacked against you as a woman in this current culture.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 09:56 PM
2

Says who? Both men and women are capable of having unkind and unrealistic and unstated expectations. Interdependence is the healthy side of dependency or co- dependency. This isn’t a gendered thing. You have ragebait in your feed and take that as ‘women’ and ‘men’.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 09:43 PM
2

Being able to expect things out of the people around you is interdependence, not transactional. It’s a healthy thing to be able to rely on a partner and to have reasonable and mutual expectations of shared effort in your life. Your definition isn’t what anyone means when they call a relationship transactional. What people mean when they say transactional is a relationship that isn’t fulfilling for at least one person but they stay because everything else they get out of the relationship is worth…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 09:27 PM
3

People in transactional relationships don’t feel fulfilled by the relationship. That’s the whole point. They are putting up with the relationship to get other important things out of it. They don’t leave because the things they are getting balance out the relationship itself being unfulfilling. Your definition of transactional is not what people are saying they do not want. Your definition is any relationship, at all, where you rely on the other person for anything. That is interdependence. Not …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 09:08 PM
4

Yeah. relationship anarchy is a philosophy that seeks to deconstruct mononormative family building and resource sharing. It basically asks what happens if we don't assume sexual/romantic dyads and bio family as the most valid relationship structures by default. One short hand I like is "community, not couples"
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/26 03:43 PM
4

I am a relationship anarchist and do polyamory. I think one of the sadder things in our current cultural is the devaluation of friendships. Part of RA, for me, is having friendships where we are planning our future together. Where we share resources and obligations that are normally reserved for romantic dyads. Friendships don't necessarily come after romantic connections, for me, when it comes to commitments. And romantic attachment is a very vivd feeling that is different then friendship, to m…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/26 02:47 PM
–

But the vast majority of women and men do commit to the definitions of words. That's how communication works. The analogy works great. You just don't like it because it reveals how crummy your reasoning and the OPs reasoning is. Even in your (terrible) example the woman you are using as an example was literally legally forced to commit to the definition at hand.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/26 01:55 AM
–

So "some women use words in vague ways" becomes "Vague language is necessary for women’s world view" You don't see the issue with that? the huge leap in logic? So would you support that I could conflate "some men commit murder" with "murder is necessary for a man's world view". Because that is what you are suggesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/26 11:12 PM
3

Yes. ‘Women’ as apposed to one supposed woman doing a false allegation. One person using words to attempt to get away with crimes is not ‘women’ using words vaguely. That’s like saying men are murders because this one guy in prison murdered people.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/26 07:21 AM
11

Yes. A legal meaning. Which is why her allegation was dismissed. Do you have a point? Your whole post is you invalidating your own claim. Like this woman apparently accused someone of something that had a legal definition and wasn’t able to prove that it happened because that legal definition exists. Nothing about that is vague.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/26 05:16 AM
–

There isn’t a hard core blue pill crowd. There is red pill nonsense and everyone who thinks it’s nonsense. This isn’t two sides. It’s the red pill and people who disagree with its extremely limited takes on human nature. Which is a huge swath of people with very different beliefs and ideologies. This sub forces the label ‘blue pill’ on folks in order to respond to particular posts. But no one walks around thinking they are hard core blue pill. I’m an far left feminist anarchist. And before you c…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 06:31 PM
24

Where are women calling being asked out by someone sexual assault? I call bullshit. Just because you can make up a strawman who uses the words differently doesn’t mean the term sexual assault is vague.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 05:13 PM
46

Sexual assault necessarily has a very real and legal definition. I would suggest that just because you don’t understand words like ‘confident’ doesn’t mean that other folks using them don’t. Love is a vague term. It’s quit expansive. The Greeks had six words for it because one word cover all these different types of affection leaves something to be desired. But like… English speakers use ‘love’ and expect you to understand that ‘I love muffins’ and ‘I love my mom’ are different because of contex…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 04:59 PM
8

Maybe with some random dude she is not that in to. Sure. But most happily sexual women have all kinds of time to enjoy fucking towards even better fucking with people they love and are attracted too. I would get annoyed at a sex toy that didn’t work. Because I have no attraction to a sex toy. A real human that I’m excited to fuck? It’s inherently very hot and the details get sorted out in all the fun exploring parts. I swear some dudes on this sub can not even picture mutual desired sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 09:52 PM
23

Any time you have a sexual partner you need to learn how to pleasure each other. It’s a learning curve. It just happens if you are in love and deeply attracted to that person it’s fun and hot to learn each other. Having 100 partners doesn’t mean you won’t have to learn how to fuck the next person. Having zero partners doesn’t mean you won’t learn how to have the best sex with next person.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 08:33 PM
34

Yeah 100% Someone I love is going to be way better sex then anyone else. Sex isn’t something being done to me. It’s a mutual act of chemistry and passion. Sex is a dynamic between people. Not a skill that one person develops and then acts out on others.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 08:08 PM
32

I hooked up with a bunch of people without those circumstances. Just because it was fun and I was exploring sex and being an adult and what I was interested in. Once I found that sex was astronomically better with people I loved (and therefor deeply attracted to) I never went back. Why have mediocre sex with people I’m not that in to? For me hooking up with random people was a phase. It was fun. But ultimately not that fun. And certainly doesn’t hold a candle to fucking people I trust and adore …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 07:12 PM
–

Most people are not interested in non monogamy. And the people interested in it are a normal mix of how people look. But like I said feel free to shit on them, it’s not like they are trying to fuck you.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 05:08 AM
–

Sure you can shit on poly folks. They are more accepting of non commercially attractive people. But in general I would say the poly population if a city is an average range looks wise as the mono population. Average folks are allowed to be popular and sexy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 02:20 AM
4

Yeah. A lot of them can’t picture what consenting mutual non monogamy looks like. Which is almost never a bunch of women with one dude. It’s a bunch of people with with all kinda of configurations of sexual and romantic partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/26 09:48 PM
7

those are not polyamorous environments. For it to be a polyamorous environment women would need to have equal rights to multiple partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/26 08:53 PM
16

Swingers are not one dude with all the women. At all. Neither are people doing hot wife stuff. That’s one woman fucking multiple men.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/26 07:47 PM
29

If you look at polyamorous folks you will see a lot of average men and women who have multiple partners. Not a few hot men with a haram.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/26 04:49 PM
20

It’s polygamy. Not polyamory. The women are forced to be monogamous to a husband they didn’t choose.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/26 04:21 PM
2

I wasn’t saying this dude is insecure and lazy. I’m saying dudes (or women) who pursue a ‘harem’ are being lazy and insecure. In poly the idea of an OPP (one penis/pussy policy) is inherently unethical and unkind. Same with insisting anyone you date/fuck also needs to date/fuck your other partner/s. It’s controlling insecure stuff. For lazy entitled people and the folks they can trick into treating like trash.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/26 10:52 PM
2

In my opinion? As someone who does polyamory and finds harem building to be deeply unethical? Lazy insecurity.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/26 10:26 PM
1

I don't think the guy talking about a harem is actually open to supporting his partners having other sexual or romantic relationships, especially not with other men.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/26 09:54 PM
2

I do polyamory. I have three life long partners. I don't think very many people actually want one partner only and forever. Even if they want monogamy. Most folks need to try out different relationships to figure out what they want out of a partner. I think people who have relationship experience very often end up in better fitting relationships down the line as they figure out who they are and what they want and have to give. I don't think monogamy or non monogamy are born in traits. I think th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/26 08:37 PM
1

The denial of men being raped is very much a part of a male dominated power structure. The patriarchy isn’t for men. It’s by (rich) men for themselves. And denying that men can be harmed by non consensual sex is pretty base line toxic masculinity. Men aren’t allowed to be masculine and harmed by sex they didn’t want.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/26 12:41 AM
2

Men getting raped (which is a terrible issue that is ignored and downplayed BY the patriarchy) has nothing to do with women falsely accusing men compared to women being raped and abused by men. Which is what this post is about. You in particular are very bad at staying on topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/26 05:27 PM
9

okay now list all the men who have actually raped, abused or murdered women. Even just the ones who have been convicted, even though rape and abuse are notoriously under reported crimes. When you have numbers instead of cherry picked examples (one of which is bullshit, the other two I havent' heard of) we can talk about if this is systemic or not. Also... did any of these people use "feminism" as an excuse? Or do you assume any action taken by any woman is claiming to be feminist inherently?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/26 12:43 AM
20

I'm not sure who you are talking about. Are these real people or reddit posts you think are women demanding coddling but also demanding to not give any care to their male partners? In healthy adult relationships both people care for each other and help take care of each other. "coddling" isn't something I see in healthy relationships. Most women don't want "overprotection". Most men don't want to be treated as a child. I do take care of other human beings. Lots of them. No need to "get back to o…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 01:34 AM
30

I'm not giving up my autonomy because men have a hard time dating. I don't want to take care of a family so I don't. If we went "back to our roots" (would love to know when "our roots" was) I wouldn't have an option to not have a kids. Some dudes dating issues don't matter anywhere near as much as my freedom to not have kids. To not get married. To have a career that I love. Maybe try some of this new fangled therapy yourself. Because taking away women's rights and freedoms isn't going to get yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 12:47 AM
25

Absolutely. Sex without consent is different situation entirely.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/26 05:56 AM
15

A hairy chest.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/26 12:52 AM
9

A woman's bodily autonomy includes the ability to abort. A man's does not. So it's foundational to this conversation. I believe men should get every opportunity to prevent pregnancy. Which means focusing on getting men reliable reversible birth control options. That is the point at which men can opt out while still choosing to have sex. After conception only a woman's bodily autonomy matters because the dude isn't pregnant. I find it telling that men on this thread don't even glance at advocatin…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 11:23 PM
15

Everyone should keep their bodily autonomy after conception. Because men's bodily autonomy is not involved in pregnancy after conception, unfortunately that means he gets no say. Which is absolutely horrifying. And why men should be focused on demanding that safe, reversible birth control is available to them, so they have more choices before it's no longer their choice to make.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:19 PM
12

No. Because men and women both keep their agency to control their bodies post conception. There is already equal right here. Other than the ones being taken away from women. Why don't you address working towards revisable birth control? Is it because it's a clear answer that would empower men, but not allow you to argue with women? Maybe pay attention to your motivations because you seem way more invested in being upset at women than advocating for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:11 PM
3

Why are lesbian's this projection I made up? I don't know dude. You think about it too much and don't have any close connections to lesbians so don't have any insight into how they think or feel or experience attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:02 PM
16

Men should get an equal choice in their own fertility. Both men and women keep their agency to control their bodies post conception... at least in some states where women haven't lost their agency to control their bodies legally post conception. Why is it more important to you to be able to legally abandon life you created than having control over creating life?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:00 PM
13

But right now there is no way for all precautions to be taken. Men should be able to opt out of being fertile. Right now there is no reversible way to do that. Men should get to decide if they are fertile. There is already reversible male birth control out there. Why don't we have it in the US? Why aren't you focus on getting access to controlling your fertility? I'm not sure why you think if both people agree that having children is not an option that one of them is lying. But that seems to be …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 09:51 PM
62

I agree. Men should be able to have cheap reversible and effective brith control. I have no idea why men aren't up in arms demanding that it happens faster and in their countries. Men should absolutely have that option. But instead they are focused on this wild idea of "paper abortions" that is obviously harmful to children. And anger at women for having more options because pregnancy happens in their bodies. Get angry at the right people. Demand your rights. I know as a feminist reversible and …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 09:16 PM
14

Which is fine for this sub that is all about redpill grievances. But a feminism sub is not focused on dating issues. I know it can be hard to understand but feminism is about a lot more then dating and it’s likely frustrating to have some guy hyper focused on this pet issue instead of actually discussing feminism.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 06:29 PM
19

Maybe because of the order they came in? Like one redpill dude keeps bringing up the same stuff and they are done with it for this week? I don’t know, I’m not their moderator. But dudes wanting to debate dating isn’t a super important feminist topic that needs multiple posts in a week.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 06:25 PM
17

Maybe for this sub. But feminist subs aren’t about debating redpill grievances. They would rather talk about feminism… it’s right there in the title.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 06:22 PM
21

Askfeminism doesn’t want to be this sub. Where the exact same dating question come up over and over again. Seems reasonable to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 06:16 PM
26

You understand women do that right? Most people who are fed up around chore distribution have tried it at least once. The people who complain (at least the ones I see on reddit, my friends don't have this issue) are complaining after trying the simple stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 12:17 AM
6

It can be hard to "debate" someone who has no clear thesis and thinks the definitions of words don't matter if they get in the way of their "point".
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 08:02 PM
15

I disagree. I know sexless folks who are kind and caring. I know people who have sex who haven't done one nice thing for anyone. The vast majority of people have periods of time when they aren't having as much sex (or any) as they would want. And they do not suddenly change how they are, what they do for their communities, or how they treat people around them. If they did? we would see everyone go through times when they suddenly weren't doing anything "good" because they haven't fucked in a yea…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:59 PM
22

I think you misunderstand how awful someone is if the only reason they are "good" is because they are currently getting sex or think they will get sex in the future by being "good". That's not a good person. And it shows often. That is someone who feels owed sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:53 PM
9

Yes, that is in your post. And no it doesn't make sense. A willing partner is not dispensing a reward for you seducing them. Or "making them" like you. A willing partner is someone who wants to fuck you too, it's something ~between~ you two. Not an act you perform and then get rewarded for. You have no understanding of what mutual desire is.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:47 PM
23

If some vague idea of "getting sex" is what is incentivizing you to "be good". You are fucked up. Treating sex as a motivator or reward or incentive is to treat sex as not mutual. It's not something that is wanted and desired by the other person on their side. It's something you earn from them.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:44 PM
15

For sex? Sure. For anything else? Why would it be, unless I am withholding sex I want to have in order to incentivize someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:37 PM
10

So you think people fuck you as a thank you for your service? Not because they mutual want to fuck you? Such an odd take. One that doesn't actually make space for mutual sexual desire.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:29 PM
19

If you not talking about sex and relationships what kind of "reward" are you talking about. Getting sex isn't a reward. reward: a thing given in recognition of one's service, effort, or achievement. If sex was a reward then it inherently wouldn't be mutual. I don't fuck someone as a thank you for their service. I fuck someone because we both want to fuck each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:10 PM
37

I don't think sex with me, or others is a "reward".
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:04 PM
3

I thought the orgasm gap was mostly in casual or new sexual connections. In my experience in a sexual relationship I am having more orgasms than my partner, simply because of the refractory period. I think in the vast majority of lasting sexual connections, people are communicating about what works for them. If you want to have good sex, you need to learn to communicate with your partner/s. Gender is kinda beside the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 10:04 PM
-3

And everyone clapped
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 05:10 AM
15

Right? Sexual compatibility doesn't get you dates. But it can really help you develop relationships. sometimes penis size is a big part of that. Sometimes it's not a part of that at all. But like... the idea that women are just passing around guy's with big dick's names to each other is a wild fantasy outside of swinging circles, where it's just a normal fantasy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 12:39 AM
3

Smart! Although I think it gets a little more complex because money/status can make up for height. A tall guy with a small dick is somehow negative points. The other women can just smell it on him.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 12:21 AM
9

I thought it was all about height and dick size AND money/status. It's nice that it's getting easier I suppose. Only one metric you have to look after.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 12:09 AM
4

You assume I take them for granted when you have zero proof of that. In fact you decide that I’m taking them for granted in the middle of me praising them for their efforts. That’s the opposite of taking someone for granted. The men I fuck, I also love because we fuck. Not sure why that’s a problem. It’s not the only reason I love men but it’s also a reason why I love men. I have no issue with you loving women you have pleasurable mutual sex with. Seems like a pretty valid reason Iike someone to…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/26 10:36 PM
4

Well yeah. I appreciate that they give effort to their community and the people they care about. It makes it so I don’t resent the effort, time and other resources I put into them and our shared projects. I put a lot of stock in what people have to give to others. I take pride in what I give and I admire what other people give. I don’t understand how that’s ‘telling’ as apposed to normal to get along with people who share your values. Capitalism isn’t trading. Yeah of course there will always be…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/26 10:09 PM
5

They are good to the people around them. Most of them are active in communities and contribute to those communities. They give their time and energy and other resources to help build things they care about with/for people they care about. Capitalism exists. The end of capitalism does as well. And we are already over the zenith into a oligarchy so… last dying breaths of capitalism is what is crushing you. Soon it’ll just be good old fashioned authoritarian crushing.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/26 09:56 PM
–

The men in my life are kind, generous, flexible in touch with their feelings. They are funny, smart and respect others. This ‘Marxist bullshit’ impacts your life in tons of ways that harm you and make you a shit person and partner. You would just rather blame women because it’s easier and dividing people by gender, race or anything you can get them to divide by is designed to keep our minds off the only social war. The class war.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/26 09:49 PM
18

I don’t have problems with the opposite sex. The men in my life are amazing. The issue is people thinking that the issues of oppression in last stage capitalism is caused by a ‘gender war’.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/26 08:41 PM
1

Absolutely. And feminists would agree with you. And the fear and shame around dick is primarily male created. Yes, women and everyone else can pick it up. But like… straight women like dick. It’s straight men who think you are broken for liking it and gross if you like a lot of different dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 07:52 PM
5

Still not about feminists. Again your ‘debate’ is about the feminist world and you have zero examples from the feminist world. You have examples of queer men being discriminated against. Yep. Feminist would agree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 01:38 AM
5

The reality is you have no examples at all of feminism or feminists holding the views you are ‘debating’ about.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 01:28 AM
5

It’s funny that you have no working feminist definition of the patriarchy, the thing you supposedly are ‘debating’ about. You have no examples. You are working off vibes only. And you do not have a passing understanding of feminism or the patriarchy.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 01:27 AM
3

You have nothing at all to back up your projections. Which makes for a very bad and lazy argument. You are arguing against your own projection. And it’s incorrect biased red pill garbage that hasn’t considered actual women or feminism once.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 01:20 AM
13

None of that is feminists talking about how dick makes men submissive. You know… what your post is about? It’s in bad faith to say feminism is saying a thing and have no examples of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 01:14 AM
5

Straight women like dick. It’s men who decided that other dudes dicks are gross and ruin people. When you are arguing about queer people then you are bringing queer people into the conversation. 10-30% of women is not insignificant.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 01:07 AM
9

But you haven’t actually provided anything feminists think. You just make up a wildly inaccurate strawman and can’t even defend that.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 01:03 AM
10

Wat? Feminists are very focused on how the patriarchy harms women. And men. In fact feminists are the only folks talking about how the patriarchy harms men because the red pill and right leaning men refuse to acknowledge the patriarchy at all. You still ah w no examples of your made up feminists stating the projected ideas you have about them.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 01:01 AM
11

Okay where is one reference then? If this is about feminist cherry picking shit why do you have zero examples of it? Red pill uses ‘feminism’ to mean any opinion you can project onto any woman ever. Yeah men and women create and maintain the patriarchy. But like it’s 100% straight men who think dick is so gross and harmful. Straight women ~like~ dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 12:55 AM
13

In conclusion: some women like some men. And some women don’t like some men. Wow. Great argument. I find queer women and non binary people like queer men. Thinking dick is gross and ruins people is misogyny made by straight men. Yes it bleeds over onto the rest of culture. But it’s men telling society that liking dick makes you not masculine and liking lots of dicks means your are gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/26 12:41 AM
9

Dude, there are plenty of men who don’t negative judge their partners or their dates about their past sexual and relationship choices. Accepting someone for who they are means you are secretly judging the fuck out of them and not talking about it. If you aren’t using your judgment that’s just you being dumb. There are plenty of people who gasp actually respect their partners. Even their pasts. You are trying so hard to make an argument but can’t be coherent long enough to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 02:19 AM
14

Dude you made it very clear what kind of judgment you were talking about in your post. That was the only clear thing in your post. It’s absolutely normal not to want to be negatively judged for your past dating/sex choices. Of course the word ‘judgment’ means more then that.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 01:43 AM
19

I’m not sure I follow. People shouldn’t date if they can’t handle judgment, instead of dating people who don’t have those judgments? Don’t date people who judge you or reject you. Hell half the work is already done for you because you can’t date people who reject you. Easy enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 01:33 AM
2

Nope. It was illegal not to sign up and it wasn’t connected to voting other then a short period of time at the start of the Vietnam war. That’s the whole point. They are automatically signed up. Do you think men that didn’t register to vote weren’t drafted to Vietnam?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/25 09:47 PM
1

No one signs up for the draft. You don’t get rid of something by having more people required to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/25 09:34 PM
13

The vast majority of Feminists (and people)don’t want the draft at all. It’s a cruel dehumanizing archaic system. Women are in the military now when they weren’t allowed before. So some women, like some men, choose to do military service once they were allowed to do it. And they get extra support from the government for their voluntary commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/25 08:00 PM
16

Men sure whine about feminism more. I think women are expecting the world they are born in to. Which means they have been expecting equal rights for a long while now. You might have had a point when the major transitions were happening. But I don’t think any woman under 70 has struggled ~more~ with having more freedoms and responsibilities. Those freedoms far outweigh those responsibilities. And I think you will find that while women couldn’t choose they still had to deal with consequences. Not …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/25 07:50 PM
2

Wow... Yikes, no wonder you are so scared of other people's sexual performance.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 01:15 AM
1

The more sex people have the higher standards they have for what hot sex is. Sure. But anyone with a really good connection can have hot extremely hot sex. Sex isn't something you do to someone. It's something between people.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 01:09 AM
2

You ask a question and presume the answer. To be honest I couldn't tell you what the "the best" sex is. Different partners can be years apart. It's not like I have photographic memories of people I fucked a couple of times a decade ago. People who are obsessed with "the best" sex tend to be people without much experience with sex. Sex with different people in different dynamics is different. Yes there are some clearly "less good" and "more good". But in my experience "more good" is simply that w…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/25 06:34 AM
3

Different people. Different dynamics. Just different. Sex is between two people. So different people make for different sexual connection and experience. It's fun and exciting. And interesting to explore. I think a lot of people's sex drives come on like that if they don't have a bunch of cultural or social shame attached. And sometimes even if they do. Sex is a pretty powerful motivator to most people. Seems pretty human to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/25 11:19 PM
8

Nope. Not at all. I was wildly in love with my first partner and I knew pretty quickly that I wanted to explore sex in ways that only having one partner for the rest of my life, simply wouldn't allow for. Sex is fascinating and fun. Being horny and young I wanted to try all kinds of things and people. One sexual partner for you entire life sounds like nothing but a draw back to me then, and now.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/25 07:37 PM
3

by who's definition?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/25 04:06 AM
27

Currently the majority of women who are childless ~want~ to be childless. It's sad when people want kids and can't have them. And it's amazing when people who don't want kids are not forced to have them. Kids are a ton of work. And they aren't intrinsically rewarding to every parent. And they are extremely taxing on the folks who love every moment of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/25 08:43 PM
9

By giving a shit about your partner’s pleasure. By getting off on your partner getting off. By being actively interested. Good sex is a dynamic between people. Not a set of actions.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 02:39 AM
59

Being good at sex won't get your first dates. But being shitty at sex will prevent your dates turning into relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 07:20 PM
7

Polyamory is often very much feminist. Feminism helped step away from there only being one valid way for women to be. And that includes monogamous. Also feminism gave us the right to vote. The right to have our own passports and travel without a husband. The right to have our own credit cards. Feminism allowed for more freedom and equality. I think you know nothing about early feminism if you think they would look at modern women in society and think nothing has changed. This is just your bias a…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/25 11:42 PM
3

I think women who have no male friends are just as limited as men who have no female friends. I think the major difference is most of the women I have know who HATE men, do not date them. Most of the men I have seen who HATE women, ultimately want to have sex with women or be in a relationship with women. So ultimately it is much more difficult on men who hate women, than on women who hate men. Not thinking of the people you want to fuck, as people... is just going to suck for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/25 02:49 AM
12

I'm not saying people don't do this. But folks who make friends and have standards don't keep friends like that. Not to mention that sometimes men and women are honestly friends without a burning unreciprocated desire for their friends just because those friends are the gender they are attracted to. You said in another post that you haven't had a female friend since you were 13. And I would say, yeah, that shows. You have no idea what it's like to have a female friend. It's pretty great! Friends…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 09:53 PM
8

I didn't say anything about "friend zone" or "dead zone". Your particular definitions are pointless to your argument of "befriending women isn't a solution". It sounds like YOU shouldn't befriend women because you get attached and are apparently attracted to women who kinda suck. But having women as friends IS a solution. It's a solution around how to think of women as full humans who are unique. It's a way to like women AS people. And both having friends, having female friends, and really actua…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 09:35 PM
26

That sounds like why YOU shouldn't have female friends. But like... dudes should have female friends for other reasons then just because they might get to date them. Knowing and liking women for reasons other than just wanting a partner, makes you a better partner and a better person. Men who have women as friends think women are more than mommy and girlfriend. They like women as people. And that only improves your chances of being an appealing partner to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 09:23 PM
27

You are right dudes who think that way are super angry. I would add they also unhealthy and obsessive and that will make it extremely hard to ever have a happy mutual relationship. Dudes who don’t think like that are much better at creating relationships. And there are a lot of them. I would say the majority of men aren’t so deeply insecure and obsessed.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 06:37 PM
3

I don't know what "left" you are talking about but people who support trans folks know that being liberal in no way means you are not default unexamined transphobic. Hell lots of liberals can't do any meaningful work to step away from systemic racism or sexism. Liberal means almost nothing when it comes to examining bigotry in our culture. Folks on the left know that very well. We see it all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 10:07 PM
-2

Okay... most people are default unexamined transphobic. That's not shocking. Whats your point? What are you even "debating" here?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 10:01 PM
0

Why does it matter to you? Are you dating trans women? Are you a trans woman? If you aren't either of those things this seems like getting your panties in a bunch over something that doesn't impact you at all. How people identify is personal. What do you gain by telling folks their own sexual orientation is wrong? If someone dates trans people they probably don't want to date folks who are freaked out by that. Because of the bigotry.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 09:56 PM
3

It's a type of non monogamy. Specifically having multiple loving committed relationships, instead of being open for sex only.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/25 04:56 PM
6

As someone who does polyamory? Monogamy and the nuclear family is still very much the norm and default. And what the vast majority of people attempt to do. Men want it. Women want it. But just like in the 50s just because you want it doesn’t mean it’s handed to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/25 04:30 PM
3

I don’t want to get married. If I am ever obligated to, in order to help my partner, I won’t be changing my name. My partner and I can be huge parts of each other’s lives without one of us losing our name to become a part of the other.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 08:47 PM
14

I love men who can show their feelings in healthy mature ways. Just like I love women who can do the same. No one wants to partner with someone who is throwing fits like a toddler. Being able to feel your emotions and express them in mature ways is amazing. It's letting people in. Busting into tears because you stubbed your toe or you get a parking ticket, or throwing a fit over a wrong order at a restaurant is unappealing and can be abusive real fast. No matter what gender you are. No one wants…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/25 11:20 PM
21

That's funny. I would say it's redpill men who group all women together and have no idea that they want different things and have different desires. And I would say it's redpill men who are obsessed with dating apps and how "unfair" they are while ONLY using dating apps to find partners. I know a lot of women who don't use apps at all. And haven't though twice about if they are fair or not because they are awful to use.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 07:19 PM
1

I have. I can’t afford to any longer. But I did for a couple of years.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 02:30 PM
2

Have you ever talked to a feminist in real life? Face to face? Or are you talking about online arguments? Because this is not my experience at all in academia with feminists.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 03:47 PM
2

They are pretty easy to find from my point of view. Once you know the basics it’s super easy to tell who has put thought into it and who hasn’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 03:03 PM
9

Agreed! Which is why you should study feminism so you can sort out which people approach gender and relationships with respect and care.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 02:50 PM
4

When it comes to incarceration it’s the court systems and the ‘justice’ system and the prison system. There is a LOT of bureaucracy involved in actually systemic issues. It’s not just social norms but it does create and enforce some social norms.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 02:46 PM
4

Sounds like you should screen more throughly to make sure you are dating feminists in the future.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 02:44 PM
3

Sexism is more then hate for one gender. It’s a lot more complex then that. It also involves positive sexism like that men are competent and don’t show feelings. That’s not hate. But it’s also trapping men into very limited roles in society. Misandry and misogyny are real but they are just one part of a much more complex set of systemic issues that control what people can be down gendered lines.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 02:01 PM
0

I wouldn’t call is misandry. Especially when it’s the systems created by men that are unjust. I would call it sexism.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 01:52 PM
4

Men are facing the same harmful gender essentialism that women face.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 01:43 PM
0

Most feminists are. The issue is most of you folks have be lied to about what feminism is and what feminists do. You have red pill men lying to you for fun and profit and have never attempted to engage with actual feminism.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 01:42 PM
16

So you mean most ~people~ don’t outwardly and explicitly care. I would agree with that. Feminist are a lot more likely to be the people that care about the unjust treatment of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 05:16 AM
14

I know a lot of feminists that teach in prison. What do you do to help incarcerated men in an unjust system?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 05:08 AM
42

My extremely feminist teaching institution that works in mens prisons would vehemently argue that men's issues are extremely systemic. Sounds like you should read up on some feminism because they vast majority of modern feminism believes gender roles are inherently systemic and harmful to all genders.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 03:35 AM
15

They should comment, early and often. So the person they are dating is well aware that this guy doesn't trust them, doesn't like their style, and doesn't support them enjoying their life the way they want to. It's so much simpler to get all the insecure bullshit out in the open before anyone gets attached.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 06:40 PM
6

The red pill generalizes all women and all men. That's just sexism. And it's inaccurate and poisons your ability ever be in a mutual relationship with a woman. If you think that people are in the predicament we are in because of a gender... then you are fucking yourself in the foot when it comes knowing the world around you, finding partners or ever creating mutual relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 09:35 PM
–

Yeah... men who want to date someone who will be their mommy and take care of them are going to be disappointed in healthy interdependent adult relationships. Just like women who are dating for a daddy. People get fucked up when they conflate parent/child love and support as romantic love and support. It's not particularly gendered. It's sloppy parenting one way or the other. Either though abandonment or dependency or co-dependency or adultification. There is a whole rainbow spectrum of how to f…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 07:35 PM
4

This person is being contrarian for clicks. You fell for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 05:25 PM
4

You don’t know people who don’t have friends? Odd considering so many male folks on this sub do not have them. If you do have friend and community and can’t find a partner or a lover? That sucks. And is likely a pretty deep issue with you being compatible with other people.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 12:52 AM
5

Cool. Healthy. Good job.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 12:50 AM
9

Plenty of people have friends and community who aren't getting laid. And there are plenty of people getting laid who don't have any friends or community. They are two different things that help each other out. If you can't create romantic connections building friendships and community is a great step towards that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 05:30 PM
12

I wasn't recommending how to get laid. I was recommending how to get a life and build a community. Which creates situations where the OP might be able to find a partner. Or be more appealing to people.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 05:24 PM
4

Gross and mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 03:57 PM
5

There are a lot of options to go out and make friends and community that don't require a lot of money. The hard part is doing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 03:54 PM
7

Not all of the suggestions take money. But it sure as hell helps to have some money.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 03:46 PM
26

Yeah the OP downvoted me immediately. The real answer is hard. It's live your life and make friends. Folks don't want to hear that. They want a list of easy solutions.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 03:43 PM
21

That guy isn't compatible with me. I don't offer exclusivity. What would I recommend to that guy? Honestly I would recommend he shake up his world in a major way. Go travel. Go to burning man. Take a month long silent yoga retreat. Go to a nudist resort. Join a church if that's your cup of tea. Start playing on some kind of team. Go do stuff and build community. Because even if those things don't result in having a partner they will result in having a more full and lived life. Which makes that g…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 03:32 PM
11

Okay. Fun story. In a voting democracy it’s logical that people get the right to vote. Not just one gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 04:35 AM
7

Both. That’s what a list of things is. It was needed, logical and actionable. Like the sentence clearly says.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 04:19 AM
17

So none. You have no examples. I’m shocked.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 04:06 AM
9

And what modern feminist philosophy have you read that leads you to believe it’s a hate group?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 03:42 AM
33

Feminism was a fight for the right to vote at the start. Which was needed, logical and actionable. You don’t know the history of feminism and you sound naive as hell trying to make statements about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:49 PM
5

Hey dude, that sucks. Being wanted and valued and seen in a relationship actually foundational to any connection. I’m sorry you haven’t found that.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 04:58 AM
22

Most men want mutual relationships. Just like most women. This isn’t controversial. All the assumptions about how women are is incorrect and silly. But sure, people want to be in mutual relationships. Take all the shitting on women out of this and you are just saying people want healthy relationships. And yeah, most of them do.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 05:36 PM
–

the idea that dating apps is the only place and only valid way to measure someone's "options" is just as red pill silly as conflating relationships with apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 07:27 PM
–

They aren't. They are a way to start dating. Not a relationship. That's such a red pill conflation that makes it hard for you to sort out the reality of relationships. Hell even in your own stats the majority of new relationships don’t come from dating apps. The person picking on a dating app isn't the whole relationship. Two people meet and then they both decide if they want to date, and they both decide if they want a relationship. They pick each other or it doesn't happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 07:16 PM
–

Wow good "debate" my guy. Ignore all the points and just state again your assumption that all women are exploiting their partners. You understand there is zero way that can be true, correct? Or is answering a question to much like a debate for you on this debate thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 07:02 PM
–

You understand that dating apps are not relationships right? I am not PPD. I haven't said men are just desperate for warm bodies. I think most men really want a loving mutual relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 07:00 PM
–

So no addressing, whatsoever, of your thought terminating cliche. Not surprised. How do you know who a good man is? How do you know they aren't being "chased"? Your assumption that women are only in relationships (with good men or not) is to exploit them means you have no understanding of mutual relationships. If you have no understanding of them, you poison yourself for ever finding one. Because how could this woman actually like you? You make your own hell and then state it like it's a fact. B…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 06:55 PM
–

Obviously in most relationships both people pick each other. It's not a one sided thing. It's strange that you seem to think it is. Don't date people who don't pick you. Healthy relationships are mutual.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 06:52 PM
–

All women choose assholes. What about all the women who don't? Well they are settling. and would prefer assholes but can't get them. You make this double negative where women can not choose any partner without being wrong. It's a thought terminating cliche. Dude how can you look at the world and not see couples where people are both middling and very happy. That's the vast majority of relationships. Do you know people? Have you met them?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 06:39 PM
–

Kids upset each other. Teenagers are assholes. Red pill content is made by men for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 10:23 PM
–

You die early and painfully without healthcare. You die without enough money to have shelter when your older and can no longer work. I would say that's a pretty clear need. What else can you count as a need other than things that will actually kill you if you don't have them? The only thing on your list that doesn't kill people if they don't have it is education. And the lack of education can still kill people. Now, most people when they speak about needs aren't talking about life and death. The…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 05:52 PM
2

I'm a woman and I don't blame a gender for our social constructs. I don't blame men or women for porn or beauty standards, I blame last stage capitalism. Most feminist have a much more complex view on women's roles in society past "choice" type feminism. Which has been "lean in" pro consumer bullshit for a long long time. Over the major waves of feminism only third wave was sex positive and "choice" forward to ignoring harm in porn, beauty standards and sex work. Modern feminists are having a mu…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 06:05 PM
3

Your friends sucking isn’t about ‘women’. You choose shitty friends if they blame for any issues in a relationship. Do your friends even like you if they assume the worst about you in the face of your relationships ending?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 07:07 PM
-2

I don't watch it be an issue for men in my community. But it certainly take actually doing it to figure that out.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/25 12:36 AM
-1

It's never been an issue for me. When you have friends and community it's not actually hard to find people who like you for who you are. Sometimes they are available to date, sometimes not. It's not a huge deal.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 10:16 PM
13

Yes, women who want to be stay at home parents are OFTEN called gold diggers. Yes, the cultural assumption is that women are childish. That's why it's still considered fine and not an insult to call adult women "girls".
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 09:38 PM
8

Men outside these echo chambers are rarely directly insulting women to their faces. When men are actively hostile towards women you can expect women to notice. In real life? Women will mostly walk away and avoid you in the future if they can tell you are actively hostile towards them. We don't have the same privileges of getting in your face in a safe way in real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 09:36 PM
13

I'm 40. Women give a fuck about being called "girl". And older women who haven't engaged online may not notice the "men" "female" thing. I, personally, don't give a fuck except that its so often clearly intended to insult women. The issue isn't the term it's the massive whiny pushback that comes from men who are intending it as a insult and using a lazy cover.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 09:24 PM
10

"guys" is not girl. I call adults of all genders "guys" No one is going to yell at you for using "male" and "female". The issues is "men" and "females". Or just "females" instead of women. I get it... words are hard. It's got to be scary not to understand why they impact the way they do while retreating to your own victimization. But genders are pretty equally insulted down gendered and and non gender lines. People who want to insult others will do it. The real issue is that LOTS of people don't…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 09:10 PM
44

Adult women are often called "girls" even in professional situations. They don't have to say "womanbaby" they can just call adults children and that is considered fine. Women are called sluts and gold diggers all the time for wanting men who can pay their bills and be a co-parent. Women are expected and assumed childish. It's an insult to call a man childish, its simply cultural sexism that assumes women are. Like I am being a bitch for not wanting be called girl at 40 in my professional career.…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 08:54 PM
1

Build friendships and communities. Actively do the work to have neat people in your world. Spend time on large shared projects that have values you like and respect. The more people you know and like the more likely you will find someone that likes you when they get to know you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:47 PM
2

Lazy ways of dating don’t work for a lot of people. Apps are a lazy way of attempting to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:41 PM
1

I am a woman. I don’t like them because they are an extremely shallow way to find someone to date. And chances are that there will no no real connection. Just a ‘hey I would bang someone shaped like you’. No one likes being treated as a option. But that isn’t inherent to app dating, while the lazy and shallow is.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:28 PM
0

People who are happy that they don't have to do the work to have friends or community in order to date, and it works for them, like dating apps. They are easy and shallow. Making friends and community is complex and takes effort. Nobody likes dating apps if they don't work for them. This really isn't gendered at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:01 PM
21

Women don't like dating apps for the same reason men don't like them. They are a lazy, shallow way to make a connection and that means you are often making connections that aren't nice or fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 06:54 PM
23

No. I said nothing about men or women not having sex. You are so excited to yell about taking women's rights away you don't bother to make sure you are actually coherent.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/25 08:36 PM
19

Yep. Which is why they should use birth control. And only fuck women they trust and agree with around what happens if she gets pregnant. And men are hopefully about to get a say in if their sperm is viable. So hopefully men won't have a bunch of issues around taking on some of the burden of birth control.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/25 08:17 PM
21

Would you take a once a day birth control pill that had some fairly major side effects? I agree that the medical filed has mostly focused on women but that also puts the burden on women. The great news is that a reversible male birth control is in phase three of clinical trials right now. And there is another type that is just starting to get clinical trials. But to pretend men have zero control over getting a woman pregnant is just silly. There are a ton of precautions that he can use. Includin…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/25 08:14 PM
26

No. I'm saying condoms work most of the time and vasectomies work almost flawlessly. There is also a reversible shot that is used in India. No idea why men aren't up in arms to get it tested and available in the US. Men could have even more options but they seem content to keep that burden on women.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/25 08:01 PM
30

Men have birth control options. It's not like there is zero effort in giving men a say in if sex results in conception.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/25 07:54 PM
11

What responsibilities do you have to gain these rights? None. Just like women. You can have these rights taken away by doing crimes and being caught but the idea that men have responsibilities tied to their rights in a way women don't, is just incorrect. Men had the right to vote before the draft was a thing. You do not have any additional responsibilities, that women do not have, to have basic rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 06:07 PM
18

You are speaking gibberish. None of these rights are free flights. Men do not have any more responsibilities because of their rights. Neither do women. It's in the title, these are rights. People have the right, they don't earn it with responsibilities. Men aren't required to provide in order to vote or have a credit card or own property. It is their right to have those things. Do you understand words?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 05:34 PM
16

None of those rights are taken away from men if they don't work or make any money or provide for no one but themselves. Those rights don't give men any additional responsibilities. They are rights. So who is missing the point?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 05:28 PM
12

What responsibilities do men have that women don't have?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 05:15 PM
25

But men already have all those rights. How does women having the same rights disadvantage men?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 04:34 PM
–

Clear mutual interest is amazing. If you find it that's awesome. Don't keep dating someone if they actively seem uninterested in you. But sex isn't the only way to show interest. And I know sex is much better for me when I know and trust someone and that simply is never going to be a first date with a stranger. I don't feel attraction until I know someone. It's the person I am attracted to. Sexual desire and sexual expression have a very wide range of expressions. It's just kinda naive to assume…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 12:19 AM
–

I’m sorry I don’t understand you because of your lack of sentence structure, using pronouns with no references, terrible grammar and a complete lack of using correct tense. But I believe you are attempting to insult my reading comprehension.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/24 06:50 PM
–

....dude... are you talking about one person and generalizing it to "women"?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/24 06:25 PM
–

‘When I insult women for how they appear why do people defend them?’ Huh… real head scratcher. ‘Well I think she is beautiful’ is telling you to shut up and stop being mean and that as a person this human is worthwhile.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/24 05:53 PM
28

I'm not particularly feminine. I find that it helps me attract men who are more into me as a person. Guys who like non normative women are often non normative themselves. And it's not like I am looking for traditional men.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 01:48 AM
0

Listen to the podcast if you are actually interested. We should all be deeply worried about how easy it is to convince people that something is real if you have a bunch of money. Even the content is incorrect.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 03:31 AM
-2

You are uninformed. Which is normal for redpill folks who often don't know the first thing about media literacy.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/24 10:09 PM
-1

Anyone who doesnt mindlessly consume mainstream media knows most public opinion was against Amber Heard. If you didnt know, you definitely overconsume what MSM and radfems say. The hate for Amber Heard was astroturfed by bots and billionairs and then picked up by redpill misogynists. If you don't know that it's because you are incredibly easy to manipulate because you only use social media for news. https://www.tortoisemedia.com/listen/who-trolled-amber/ Maybe check in with your own bubble befor…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/24 05:32 PM
31

No. Because I never fucked those guys anyway. My partners are leftist. I wouldn't be attracted to them if they weren't.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/24 08:57 PM
1

I know it’s hard to imagine but some people enjoy sex work. If we treated it as a valuable and important part of care for humanity and it wasn’t created by the pressures of capitalism there would be a lot less. But there would still be people who want to do it to help other and offer connection and touch to those who can’t find it on their own. Sex work can be sacred.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 04:05 PM
4

That is an issue of employment not of law. See the issue of capitalism again.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 02:21 AM
5

I think the issue with sex work is capitalism. I don't think legalizing it will fix its issues because it wouldn't end capitalism. The idea that de criminalizing sex work would have standard anti-discrimination legislation applied to it is laughable. Look at other places it's de criminalized, they still get to consent or not consent to individuals.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 12:06 AM
7

Those are indeed some ideas about sex work. You have correctly identified a topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 10:11 PM
12

"they're applauded for it by their feminist man-hating covens" for one.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 07:24 PM
35

If you think feminists, or rather, "feminist man-hating covens" have a consistent point of view about sex work you are extremely incorrect. There are a SHIT TON of conversations and debate in feminism around sex work of all kinds. They are a lot more in depth and nuanced than anything you posted. If you are interested in sex work and gendered exploitation, instead of just shitting on women, you could find a lot of useful lines of exploration in feminism. But dude, people falling for internet sca…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 03:59 PM
12

No one is hiding trad wives or stay at home mom's, those are the defaults. Choice is the point. See all the options so women can choose. I don't want to be a wife or a mother. That's my choice. It didn't use to be a choice. Now it is. Women can still choose to be trad wives. But now it would be a choice instead of a mandate.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 04:50 AM
1

For a bunch of them, that is what they want. Independence. Or any other relationship shape that isn't marriage. There are a lot of options. Different women want different things... I know ~shocking~.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 10:00 PM
1

The horror! a couple of unhappy people you know means all women should be pressured into marriage. I know a lot of happy women in that age range that don't want to be married or don't want to be married again. That doesn't mean they are single and friendless. Just means marriage doesn't matter to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 09:52 PM
1

Sure there are a lot of reasons to pressure women to marry. The assumption that unmarried women are unhappy is likely one of them. Someone waiting for prince charming at 50 is someone who deeply believes in marriage. Most women who are happily unmarried don't think highly of marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 09:38 PM
9

Women are not considered full adults until they marry for a surprising amount of people. Women are often the catalyst of early marriage because there is a TON of pressure to take the ‘next step’ in your life. Not to mention if she wants kids. The idea that society doesn’t deeply pressure women to marry is absurd.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 04:02 AM
9

Women have a tendency to get into long term committed relationships. Often quickly, often young. And gay women don’t have the same amount of social stigma about ending marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 03:59 AM
20

More gay women marry, then gay men. Gay women do U-Haul type relationships and commit very quickly. They tend to fast track emotional intimacy because both of them are capable of that. Women are more socially conditioned to want marriage. And young quick marriages often fail. As well as gay women being more likely to end a dysfunctional marriage despite social stigma because they are more accustomed to social stigma in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 01:49 AM
0

I’m 40 so not a little girl. And gaslighting has a meaning that you don’t understand at all. It’s intimate partner abuse where someone consistently undermines the other partners sanity to the point where the partner believes them. ‘You are wrong about your bad assumption’ to an internet stranger can not possibly be gaslighting. you look extra foolish for pretending you understand the terms you use. Like google is right there my guy. Also I was telling him that many men and many women let sex imp…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 10:25 PM
3

So do the men who do the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 09:33 PM
1

You do not understand what gaslighting is. It makes you look foolish when you attempt to use that term.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 09:32 PM
1

I love being 40. I don't know why my best days would be behind me. Life is great at 40. But this dating fever in your 20s thing, is both a limited amount of time, and not happening to everyone in their 20s. And TRP treats it like it's ALL women and ALL men.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 07:17 PM
2

Yeah men who are able to be friends with women are seen as more positive by (some) women. I don't see a lot of judgement for long term single guys in my world. Or long term single women. Part of that is probably middle age. People just don't care as much about other people's sex lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 06:49 PM
0

I completely agree that some men are insecure about sex. I agree that people of all genders can get hung up around their personal "worth" and attach it to how much of which kinds of sex are availably to them. I don't think it's gendered. I think that's just what happens when sex is so important to humans, and so spotlighted (good and bad) in our culture. Also it is "society" telling you if it's based of contrast in what "women" get. That takes a lot of women correct? And a lot of men? Well... fr…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 06:46 PM
0

I think what you mean to say it YOU, personally, tie your self worth to sex. I agree that sucks. In your shoes I would be working on stepping away from that. It's not particularly healthy for folks to do that. And it actually makes a healthy happy sex life harder to find.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 06:39 PM
0

You have no idea how lonely and isolated some women are. "women" are half the planet. There are many of them that feel completely unseen and unloved and are dying for a first kiss. It's like you assume all women are pretty, young and desirable, they aren't. And you can be pretty and STILL be very lonely and very desperate and base your self worth on sex. One of the main issues with TRP is you all are picturing one type of woman and conflating it with all women. You generalize so much what you sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 06:27 PM
3

It's also popular to call people ugly, fat and other names. People also have issues around self worth when it comes to their looks completely outside of sex. Not to mention people directly insulting you is probably damaging to most people's self worth. The issue is the OP thinks self worth is simple and gendered. Instead of extremely complex, cultural and personal. I know it's shocking but women are also mocked for being virgins, as well as some women are mocked being sexually active. There is n…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 06:22 PM
15

Lots of women also tie their self worth to sex and desire. It's really not uncommon and it's not particularly gendered. It's just that some women and some men who tie their self worth to sex don't have any issues getting sex. And some women and some men who do the same really struggle with getting sex. And lots of people of all genders don't tie their self worth to sex. Honestly the folks in happy stable relationships don't do it because they have sex and find that it doesn't completely change t…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 06:02 PM
–

You actively want a partner who doesn’t like sex? Odd. But okay. There are tons of them out there. I hope the best for you!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:04 AM
–

Having a mutually pleasing time is treating people like they are disposable? The idea that sex devalues people is the issue there. Is it devaluing to play a pick up game of tennis when both people want to and enjoy it and may never play tennis again together?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:00 AM
–

A woman who likes sex enough to get sex? GROSSS. I want a woman who doesn't know if she likes sex so we can fall in love and we can have a dead bedroom relationship where she won't put her mouth on on my dick because she didn't know how much she wasn't into dick until ME. That's how I know I'm special!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 01:49 AM
3

I see cheating as a problem for mono normies because it involves betrayal and lying in a relationship. I don't think that gendering it is helpful in figuring it out in a relationship. And your idea of "complex sociological problem" around it is because your normies and haven't done any deep introspection on love, sex, relationships or gender. So it turns into "what if WOMEN are the problem".
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 03:11 AM
3

I don't know shit about liberals. I'm on the radical left. So I can't speak for them. I don't even think of cheating as a problem. I think of lying, hiding and betrayal as a problem in a romantic relationship. Personally? I'm a relationship anarchist. My partners can't even cheat on me unless they don't disclose a change in sexual risk before we fuck again. But tell me more about your projection of liberals. It's... um... something...
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 03:07 AM
8

That's sad. You really remember that Sarah kissed mike when she was supposed to be dating Greg in 10th grade? Maybe get a hobby.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:53 AM
4

Because it's shitting on a gender when that isn't needed. Saying "hey aren't women really the cheaters, I know 90 of them" is lazy and gender and anti-woman. Cheating is interesting. Cheating is harmful. Cheating is a human thing. It's worth talking about and thinking about. But gendering it doesn't help actually look at it. Which gender cheats more? How could we ever tell and why does it matter? Unless it's someone trying to shit on half the population of the earth because you shouldn't trust t…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:50 AM
8

Men. A lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:46 AM
10

The idea that one gender cheats more than another is just a bit silly and not backed up by much. It's just people getting mad at the gender they are supposed to be attracted to, inherently ruining their chance to find a mutual connection by poisoning them towards a whole gender. Does it matter? nope. Is it harmful to sit around telling each other that the gender you are attracted to is somehow awful inherently? yep, but only to you guys, and anyone that gets poisoned past the personal and toward…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:38 AM
9

Hahaha. So cheap. I disagree with you because your claim is clearly stupid and your response is ‘no but you must be a slut or a dude’ Your post is clearly lazy and anecdotal. But please, go on.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:08 AM
7

But you can’t remember their names. I work very hard to hold 160 collaborators in my head at a time. You can’t believe that you remember who ‘cheated’ in middle school.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:05 AM
9

I’m not offended. I just find your assertions pretty silly and clearly biased. Very few people know 100 women enough to know their names. Do you know 100 men and if they cheated?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 01:58 AM
10

So you can name 100 women and the 90 that cheated? Or are you just confirming your bias with made up numbers and your feels? And of the men you knew... what is the number that cheated? 45? 23? 17?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 01:48 AM
33

You were close enough to 100 women for them to share with you that they were cheating or not? Only my closest friends have ever admitted to cheating to me, and that was almost always in the past. I don't see cheating as a particularly gendered thing. Some people cheat. Some don't. Some do it for awhile and then stop. Some do it once and then never again. Some people do it for their whole lives. I have a lot of close friendship with men and women and I don't know any who currently cheat because i…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 01:24 AM
2

I’m 5’6” not that tall for the US but I’ve dated men that are shorter then me.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 03:38 AM
4

I have some preferences around guys (I like them to be bigger then me, I like them to be harrier then me) but if I like someone as a person what I can be attracted to is a pretty wide range. I don't know, I assume other people are the same. If you enjoy someone then what they look like (within a pretty broad range) is attractive to me. And like I said, it's never been an issue with men in my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 02:31 AM
4

yeah. I trim my pubic hair but that's it. I like it a hell of a lot better than constant stubble. It's way too much effort. I don't like the way it feels and it irritates my skin. Plus I like the way having body hair looks. It looks like me.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 02:18 AM
12

It's never been an issue with anyone I wanted a relationship with either. I mean honestly if my body hair is enough to turn someone off they don't like me very much.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/24 09:41 PM
25

As a woman who doesn't shave, It's never been an issue with getting action. Some dudes really don't care. Some dudes like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/24 09:26 PM
4

It’s off putting for some women. It’s off putting to some people. But it’s certainly not off putting for a bunch of people that admire and respect emotional intelligence.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 11:49 PM
6

We aren't saying the same thing because you can't follow what healthy emotional regulation is. Being vulnerably is sharing your feelings without lashing out, without going crazy or breaking down... it's not a mask. It's actual healthy processing. It helps people through their feelings without needing to take them out on other people and without need to cram them all down until they can not function. It is MORE vulnerable to sit with a partner and cry then it is to throw something across the room…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 09:22 PM
7

Nope. Regulation is sharing your feelings and letting people in without harming them by taking out your feelings on them. God... no wonder so many men struggle if they don't know the basics about how to be an adult. We all need to regulate our emotional expressions. That is taking care of ourselves and each other. It's fundamental to maturing and growing up. Sharing your feelings with people you love and trust is a part of processing them so you don't blow up and take out your feelings on others…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 08:50 PM
6

And in healthy relationships men share their emotions in regulated ways. Like adults. They can express anger, hurt, anxiety, frustration, grief, depression without lashing out or screaming or throwing things or threatening to self harm. You know, normal adult emotional regulation.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 08:48 PM
8

Its meaningless to say that healthy adults want to date people who can emotionally regulate? You want to date women who cry or scream when they get overwhelmed? You want to date people who act like children when they don't get their way? You want to date people who lash out and try to hurt you because they are hurt?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 08:29 PM
8

Sure. And a bunch of them get dumped for that. I had a friend in college who got dumped because she started crying because she was hungry. She was young and didn't know how to emotionally regulate well and that was deeply unappealing for the adult person she was dating. Just like my male friend got dumped for punching a wall because he was angry and didn't know how to process that in a healthy way. People who can not emotionally regulate like adults are unappealing no matter what the gender. And…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 08:19 PM
12

I know plenty of men who have dumped women and plenty of women who have dumped women for not being able to emotionally regulate. No one wants to date someone who can't emotionally regulate unless they are codependent and don't feel safe unless they are over functioning for a partner. Healthy adults want to date adults. Throwing fits is not a sign of a healthy adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 08:09 PM
11

You can want someone to share their emotions and feelings AND want to only date adults who have adult level emotional regulation abilities. An adult throwing a fit like a toddler is a scary turn off no matter what their gender is. Sharing your feelings and being able to express them is part of healthy emotional regulation. People do it so they don’t bottle it up and then freak out like a child.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 07:46 PM
10

The patriarchy has never meant that men had it good and had happy relationships handed to them. The patriarchy is run by men. It’s not for men. It’s for rich people.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 10:58 PM
14

That's the way we never were. You are projecting a fantasy onto the past.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 10:07 PM
8

The issues with overpopulation isn't space. It's food, water, habitable shelter, basic medical support and education.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 08:52 PM
1

That's just the vibe I get these days from modern feminist urban women, walking down the street, riding public transport, sitting at the park, I just get the general feeling and mood in the air that "we'd prefer if you didn't exist". So this has nothing to do with your online circles. Just suddenly women you don't talk to and don't interact with "feel" like they don't want you to exist? I find it different these days. Even 10 years ago it was friendlier, like people would wait their turn in queu…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 12:07 PM
1

How many feminists have you talked to in real life? "we don't need men anymore" is the 2nd wave stuff I was talking about. It is extremely rare in modern feminist thought. You are misreading everything I wrote if you think I want more gender segregation.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 11:59 AM
1

People are capable of change without a rock bottom. I've seen it myself. Hell, I've done it myself. Ideally people change their whole lives to keep becoming a person that they like and respect. We aren't as fixed as the doom loop would have blackpilled folks believe. I'm glad you found some change. And I hope you keep changing. Honestly I think the most helpful thing we can do sometimes is be an example to others.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 11:34 AM
1

I agree. And I think there are a lot of men (and women) who have internalized homophobia towards male platonic intimacy. It sucks and it harms men.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 11:29 AM
1

We can't make people change if they don't want to. We can just keep being examples of other choices and welcoming to new people in our affinity groups.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 11:20 AM
2

Our cultural gender roles are a trap. Men and women are equally trapped in them. There are bonuses and draw back to each role. And it's super easy not to see your own bonuses at all, because you have always had them. That's not counter to feminism. That IS feminism. Not the strange made up concept of feminism held by online warriors who take the worst of the 2nd wave as wrote, like any modern feminist believes that. Gender roles harm everyone who doesn't fit neatly in them. And men are just as l…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 11:17 AM
0

Those spaces already exist. Sports being a huge one of them for men. I've seen male strangers hold each other and cry over sports. In the hippie circles like burning man and other festivals I see men being close and holding each other. Guys that play on teams together build amazing bonds. Guys that build things together. Guys that share religion together. There are a TON of men out there that have found amazing ways to bond with other men. But they go out and DO THAT. not just sit on a computer …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 11:13 AM
4

I think pointing out that our culture is harming men by instilling these homophobic ideas into platonic touch is useful, yes. You don't have to go against your desires.... but knowing that our culture picked them for you might help you see them more clearly. Our culture has decimated platonic touch as a concept. For many women (and men) non professional touch has to be sexual or familial to be okay. And women who don't want to cuddle their male friends are probably women who sexualize touch inhe…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 11:03 AM
3

I'm a woman. And I have a lot of friends I share platonic touch with. And some of those friends are dudes who have no issue with platonic touch with their male friends. No one is stopping anyone. We just have a culture that means for a lot of men they won't ask or will respond negatively if they are asked. Men are trained by our culture to think that kind of closeness with other men is weak or bad or gay. Even some gay men really struggle with how men are expected to not want or need or desire t…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 10:56 AM
2

No one is stopping you from cuddling other men, provided that man wants to be cuddled. I'm a woman. Culturally I am allowed to touch men and men are allowed to accept my touch. You do understand what preferences are right? I'm sure you strongly support women when they are voicing theirs. And other cultures don't have this preference. There are places in the world where men regularly hold hands with each other as part of brotherly love. Are all those men just acting on preference without regard t…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 10:49 AM
3

It's sad that "have more handshakes" is what you come up with. Our culture has done a number on you. And you get mad at men who point it out, thinking the issue is thier entitlement instead of a culture that has no space for people to get platonic touch. The 50s was more tolerant of straight white men fitting into typical societal roles. Just less tolerant of literally everyone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 10:42 AM
5

Babies can die without skin to skin contact. Humans do need touch and in our culture we only have space for sexual/romantic touch and professional touch. It's a real bummer and it hurts a bunch of people regardless of gender. Why can't men cuddle other men? Because of our shitty culture. It's seen as weak or gay. Platonic touch is powerful and important and it's sad that it's so invisible as an option. You are expressing the social construct that men shouldn't need touch, which is part of the pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 10:28 AM
1

By who? No one I’ve ever seen has had issue with men being friends or sharing feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/24 02:04 PM
1

There are assholes in every gender, for sure. The obscenely rich benefit from the status quo which is the patriarchy. And that includes obscenely rich women.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/24 01:40 PM
6

It’s men, not women, who socially enforce not sharing feelings or displaying emotions. And a lot of men share their feelings with their friends just fine. It’s the patriarchy that defines men as less than for having feelings other then neutral and anger. It’s the patriarchy that socially enforces men to not be close intimate friends with each other and seek all emotional support from women.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/24 01:33 PM
6

You can not legally marry more then one partner in the vast majority of countries. Most poly folks are pretty normative and want a spouse, to co-parent and to share a home. That’s all easier with legal marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 07:25 AM
6

Oral herpes, the most common STI to pick up in childhood is not ‘relatively rare’. The majority of people in the US have it. And the majority of those got it in childhood.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 07:21 AM
9

Lots of poly people are married to one partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 07:19 AM
3

Chatgbt because you can’t possibly Google it. And no you can’t see my research it stored on my server In Canada and it’s very very real and very very hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/24 09:02 AM
12

Links? Because you are absolutely making that up.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/24 06:51 AM
1

That's a wild leap in logic. Attractive people who ~want~ a relationship and consistently struggle to find or keep them are often fucked up emotionally in some way.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/24 07:51 PM
2

Yeah in my social circles there is an ongoing joke around ‘crazy hot’ or ‘CRAZY hot’
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/24 07:12 PM
5

Then where do you feel like this isn't being said? What forces are stopping you or anyone from saying a attractive woman who can't find a partner when she wants one, most likely has a terrible personality?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/24 07:03 PM
0

Who is "forbidding" you? Where is it "forbidden"? Pretty people who can not find a relationship when they want one? Have fucked up personalities. Men and women.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/24 06:58 PM
9

"daddy issues" are talked about a lot in both men and women but it's mostly from shitty fathers or absent fathers. I think our society has a lot more space for girls to be attached to their dads. Marriage, historically, has been the father "giving away" the bride to the husband. Our cultural supports girl children being attached to their male head of the household because that's appropriate in the patriarchy. Everyone is attached to daddy (although boys aren't supposed to be emotionally attached…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/24 07:17 PM
9

The vast majority of men and women already have a middle ground. Most people can not afford to support a whole additional person without additional income. Out of dozens of hetero friends I only know one household where the woman isn't working that that's because she is going back to school after rising a kid. I know three households where the man is unemployed currently. Just personally? I enjoy paying for dates and vacations and rent and treats. It reminds me that I have a good job that I love…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/24 04:51 PM
–

And yet women date, create relationships with and marry, men who don't have most of, or any of those things. People, regardless of gender bring themselves to the relationship. Enjoying spending time together is the basics of what people mutually bring to a relationship. Compatibility. Healthy relationships are mutual.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 12:55 AM
–

I just like cats, hate kids and don't want to marry. I think it's pretty unhealthy if a spouse depends solely on their spouse for company, to the extent that a spouse having friends is a negative thing. That's just sad.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 06:28 PM
7

No one healthy likes being cheated on. No one likes being lied to. No one likes having promises broken. You write about women like you've only ever watched red pill content and have never spoken to one. Do you think you mom would like to be cheated on?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 08:25 PM
7

We live in a patriarchy though, so don't you think a lot of marriage is really kinda coerced by men? No. I would say our culture puts a lot more pressure on women to be married so in general I think pressure to get married comes from women more often then men. Not always but in general. They would just do it but not talk about it openly. I don't think there is some secret stash of women who are happy to be cheated on and are just waiting to for the laws to change so they can be more legally tied…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 08:12 PM
10

67.8% of men in the US are married. That's the majority of men. That is the result of dating choices by men and women. It in no way is "ensuring" that a tiny number of men sleep with most of the women. Or are you claiming that, because no one man is with any fixed group of women for any length of time, therefore it's not polygamy? Polygamy is a real thing with a definition. It's one man married to more than one woman. So no, the thing you are describing here is not polygamy by definition. But ho…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:57 PM
14

Nope. Not really. Some people love alone time, I don't think that is particularly gendered. I don't think anyone in a healthy relationship wishes for their partner to disappear for quite a long while.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:50 PM
7

Polyamory is a relationship agreement that people can have, or pursue, multiple romantic, sexual and committed relationships. I have three long term partners. They have other partners. In polygamy, being a woman, I would be legally married to one man and not allowed to have partner's outside of him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:48 PM
15

That sentence is a garbled mess. Try again. What are you asking? Try not to use double negatives.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:32 PM
11

By not consenting to be in polygamy. They are actively not choosing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:28 PM
17

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:21 PM
10

I do polyamory. And I would say that it's pretty feminist and getting more popular. But the idea that polygamy is what any feminists want is insane. If you are really worried about abused kids then you should support free birth control, abortion and a larger social safety net.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:17 PM
–

Your allowed. No one "allows" your attractions. What a wild idea. I don't find super ambitious men attractive myself. I'm impressed by guys who are ambitious, I like to work with them. But I'm attracted to men who are much more laid back and anticapitalist.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/23 01:50 AM
8

Right because it's hard for people to fly in planes, take birth control, drive a car, use a smart phone. Yep.... we are all stuck with what (we assume from this point in history) we were like a hundred million years ago. ​ I take it you are ready to hunt down a mammoth and are terrified cross walk signs. ​ Culture is a massive force. You don't have a glimmer of an understanding of what you are trying to assert.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/23 12:43 AM
17

You understand that cheap reliable birth control is a thing right? Young people end up pregnant because they don't have that option or they aren't educated. ​ Alternatively, getting pregnant is the woman's worst nightmare. This defines why the sexes naturally dislike each other when it comes to casual sex. I think getting a woman pregnant is also one of men's worst nightmares. If the sexes "naturally dislike each other when it comes to casual sex" why do they keep having casual sex together? ​ Y…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/23 11:54 PM
9

Hopefully you don't get married to someone who is showing you that they do not trust you. Being questioned or accused of cheating over and over again is abuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 05:47 PM
3

Women against marriage don't know why they are against marriage, they just repeat it to feel “outside the box” and superior to other people I am a woman against marriage. You didn't say "some women against marriage" you said "women". When you generalize that much you end up sounding extremely ignorant.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 11:20 PM
3

I find marriage to be sexist. I hate the symbols of it. I do not want to be given away. I do not want to be owned. I hate the tradition of weddings. I worked in weddings for years doing production and I find them to be inexcusable wastes of money. I do not want to change my name. I do not want to become legally "one" with my partner. I do not want to become symbolically "one" with my partner to my society. I do not want to register my loving relationship with the government. ​ There are a lot of…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 11:01 PM
5

I'm 39 and still actively find the institution goes against my personal values. I've been with my partner 18 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 10:41 PM
2

Why would the place be under his name and his only? Do you think all relationships are one broke woman and a man who owns a house? ​ I live with a partner and I will never marry if I can avoid it. I do not like the history. I don't like the symbolism. I don't want the state involved in my love life. I simply do not like the institution at all. I don't want kids. I'm not in this relationship to be owed my partner's money that is a dumb motivator for independent people. ​ Thinking of marriage as a…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 10:37 PM
2

bots
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 03:04 AM
9

Trad men are a nightmare. Why on earth would I choose that for myself? ​ I want to work. I don't want to have kids. I don't want monogamy. I want my relationships to allow for me to be a full independent human and support my partner to do the same, which a trad dude has no interest in and no ability to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 11:46 PM
2

I have no interest in marriage. I’m poly and my partners are too. So I support them having casual sex or building other relationships however they want. I won’t stay with people who are shitty to the folks the fuck so i expect them to treat people well but that’s about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 03:54 PM
4

Pro tip: instead of worrying about the judgment of others just find your people, the folks who want the same things as you do. ​ It's super easy to ignore the judgment of others if you have friends and community that genuinely support you.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 12:16 AM
2

There's no free pass that lets one completely avoid judgment. From society as a whole, if they can somehow read your history without you actively sharing it? Sure. From a partner? It's super easy to avoid judgment. You pick people who don't judge you.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 11:34 PM
6

I don't understand born again virgins. But I think experimenting sexually is a pretty normal phase for humans to go through. Sex is interesting and fun and complex emotionally and socially. There is a LOT of exploring to do for folks who want to. And it seems pretty normal that through exploring you would figure out what you like and settle into doing the things you like. ​ I had a bunch of casual sex when I started having sex. Then I figured out that I only really enjoy sex with people I love. …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 10:39 PM
1

I enjoy sex. It’s never harmed anyone or society.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 02:33 AM
4

Sure if you actively seek to sexually shame people because you think sex is between you two and god and no one else... sure. ​ But the vast vast majority of people who get married, or not, don't have such a limited and backwards take on sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 09:43 PM
27

Your post is just a long way to say that women who have sex with other men aren't "worth" marrying. It's not an actual complaint it's just an excuse to say women are damaged goods and not worthy of a ring (or being bought, or whatever silly thing you are complaining about). ​ It's not a real view because no one is really dumb enough to believe that marriage is fully and only about sex. It's just a long winded way to say women are worth less when they have had sexual partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 07:02 PM
31

I never want to get married. There are a lot of really valid reasons not to want to get married. But this? This is just an excuse to insult women and call them names and attempt to try and dangle something you assume women want to shame them for enjoying sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 06:48 PM
2

Being amazing to talk to. Thinking deeply about the world. Being kind and calm in the face of difficulties. And being funny (to me) is always attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 06:35 PM
24

So two whole relationships in the country. Do rich men sometimes finance their partners businesses? Of course. Do rich people often exaggerate how hard they work? For sure. But this is like .01% of the population. And in that population there are plenty of partners of wealthy people that do work very hard and plenty of wealthy people who do not. You’ve seen a thing twice and are projecting it onto all relationships with wealthy men.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/23 08:27 PM
2

The only rational takeaway from this entire debate is don't waste your life and your time on advice that speaks in thought terminating clichés about absolutes down gendered lines.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/23 10:26 PM
1

I only see two comments that you are gross the rest are making fun of you. ​ I didn't see any racist jokes I dug through most of them. But I do agree that is out of line. Making fun of you for presenting buying sex work as some kind of flex is the funny/sad/pathetic bit. Making it racist comments is not needed, is harmful and doesn't add anything to the humor.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 12:25 AM
2

So a few people are saying it's gross. Most of them are saying it's funny and sad. But I wouldn't take that "outrage culture". They aren't outraged. Most of them are simply clowning on you. And some of them are saying you are gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 12:06 AM
14

The comments on yours don't seem indignant. They aren't offended, they are just enjoying making fun of you. They aren't outraged, they are dogpilling to see who can make fun of you the best. ​ Thinking something is pathetic, is not the same as being offended or outraged. They aren't even arguing... they all agree and are seeing who can make the best joke out it. ​ Do I think it's helpful to society? Probably not. Is it funny? Sometimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/23 08:00 PM
9

Birth rates drop when more people are educated. It's not about which gender. ​ Why would anyone preach to anyone about having kids they do not want? Other people's choices around kids has nothing at all to do with you. It seems pretty obvious that kids are happier and healthier in families that considered creating life and chose to intentionally, then folks who have kids because it's simply what you do or they didn't know they had options. ​ Why is the red pill so concerned about birth rates? Li…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/23 10:52 PM
1

‘Hypergamy’ which literally means marriage above your class but what TRP takes as wrote to mean ‘women will dump whoever they are with if someone ‘better’ comes along’ is really very different then promiscuity. Liking sex is great. Exploring sex is great for some people and awful for others. And neither have anything to say about if you marry a person from a higher class or are ready to drop a partner the moment someone that society says is more successful comes along.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 10:19 PM
2

Settling isn’t about a list of qualities it’s about how each of them feel deeply inside. They could both be settling. They could both be past ready for a a person to build a life with. They could both see each others draw backs and be weighing them with the positives and their chances of meeting someone better. And they could both be stupid in love and feel like they found their life partner (as many many people agreeing to get married feel).
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 09:27 PM
0

So a woman will always leave for someone better and a guy doesn’t need to impress a woman a lot to keep her… really solid logical ideology you have there. If you actually believe all women are hypergamous then no man can ever feel secure or loved in a relationship. How could he? She is programmed to leave him the moment something better comes along. Your unifying idea of all women is silly. And if you believe it it’s super self defeating. So could it be that your wrong? That ‘all women’ is actua…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 07:59 PM
0

In an ideal monogamous setup there are no better men for a woman to branch swing to. But all women are "hypergamous" so how is that possible. There will always be someone better then 90% of all people... so how does TRP work for him?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 06:59 PM
0

So TRP is teaching men how to settle for a woman who have a sunk cost fallacy... and that is supposed to be a good thing? ​ "all women" being hypergamous how would any of them have feelings for the guys she ended up with? He's her last choice she could pull off? If all women are like that then no women love men? No men are ever really loved? And that is a good and rational thing to teach people?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 06:19 PM
-1

If all women are "hypergamous" what is the point? If "all women" will leave their partner at the hint of someone better in someway, being interested... isn't that saying no woman can ever really love or be committed to any man?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 05:56 PM
34

It's a really poisoned ideology. It teaches men that women can not actually like them for who they are. So even if they get dates it's makes it impossible for them to feel mutual attraction, desire and love. Because she's just using them. Or "it's just you turn". It teaches men that women can not like them in mutual ways. And that is going to get in the way of ever feeling love even if they run into it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/23 11:39 PM
–

Imagine raising a daughter as a father, living your entire life for her and putting everything you have in to her well-being and safety just for her to get brainwashed, say men are trash and ruined society, disrespect you over literally no reason and then sleep with tons of dudes just because she is spiteful of the perception of being controlled because feminists told her she's a victim.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/23 06:57 PM
–

Yeah why even have kids if you don't get to fuck them? Right?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/23 06:53 PM
3

I don't want to get married and I like sex. ​ Sexual compatibility is a big part of wanting to be in a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/23 06:49 PM
2

I don't get mad at random men not caring about me. Why would they? I'm not here asking for support for my problems. I am on a debate sub addressing an OP who thinks casual sex is painful because it's casual and doesn't seem to understand that is the whole point.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 07:22 PM
4

Where did I say that? You project a LOT. ​ I don't have a lot of sympathy for anyone who is choosing to have casual sex when it doesn't work for them. ​ Lying is bad. It's bad for all genders to lie to people in order to get sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 06:39 PM
6

Most people know that people who want to have sex with them act interested in them. Because they are. ​ You might not think your post is complaining about casual sex, but it is. All your warnings are about someone who expecting casual sex to not be casual. People who want and enjoy casual sex are not upset when the normal peacing out happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 06:28 PM
5

I don't care about men being hurt that the casual sex they had was casual sex... no. That seems like something they need to work through with a therapist.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 06:05 PM
6

So your issue with casual sex is that it's casual sex. Got it. ​ Don't do it if you don't like it being casual. If you are having sex with someone you barely know? Then it's casual. Don't get attached. ​ If someone is out right lying that's not great. But how often are you running into women who are dangling an offer of a relationship in order to get sex with you? Acting interested is normal. If they are going to have sex with you they are interested.... in sex with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 06:04 PM
8

peacing out is just a different iteration of your emotions coming at our expense. How so? A woman had casual sex and then moved on. How is that at the expense of anyone? Why would there be any other expectation around casual sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 05:41 PM
9

OP's list of complaints are all about women peacing out. ​ If you do not like women of course you don't want to spend time with them. That's a completely different point than the post.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 05:30 PM
13

Isn't the expectation of casual sex that both people "peace out"... because it's not a relationship... it's casual sex. Why are you going into casual sex expecting the other person to stick around?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 05:23 PM
2

feminism is constantly critiquing itself. It's inherently a part of it. ​ The only reason people who have never read a book on feminism know the concept of the waves of feminism is because of feminism self critique.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/23 11:35 PM
-1

It's draining, its exhausting, and can be frustrating. But this is what all relationships are regardless of what anyone tells you. Sounds like you've never had a good relationship. No disrespect to any women, but y'all suck at communicating People regardless of gender are not great at communicating. We aren't taught how to identify feelings and articulate them. It's a pretty massive issue when it comes to intimate connections. And, like most things, is not down gendered lines even remotely.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/23 09:34 PM
–

Not Red Pilled guys. They don't like women. ​ Healthy men? Sure. Of course. People who haven't decided all issues are about gender have no issues being friends with people of any gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/23 09:22 PM
8

How is that not bad at communicating? Not being able to articulate your views or understand that they may be different from other people, is a pretty damned clear sign that you aren't particularly good at communicating.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/23 09:04 PM
32

OP: My partner is bad at communicating so this is an issue with an entire gender, have you simply tried to treat every woman the way I eventually figure out how to treat my partner? It worked for me!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/23 08:30 PM
10

There are so many wonderful men in my life that the unexamined vitriolic misogyny of the red pill doesn't change the way I feel about men in general. The men I know, think and feel deeply. And interested and engaged with the world. They are pretty amazing, just like the women in my life. A lot of people suck, thankfully many people do not.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/23 07:22 PM
–

Keep avoiding and deflecting instead of addressing how hard you are owned by your own obviously untrue generalizations.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/23 01:39 AM
–

You only value women around sex? Like you only value your mother and grandmother, aunts and sisters as sex objects and nothing more? Wild. ​ What an difficult kink you ended up with.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/23 01:22 AM
–

What truth? That you, personally, can not think of women as functional adults? ​ I mean, yeah... that hurts you, pretty deeply. You should probably address that.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/23 01:16 AM
–

Yes, what a well thought out generalization about all women. So smart. So thought through. So attached to reality. ​ You've never had a mother? A female teacher? Any woman at all that you thought had the mental capacity of an adult?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/23 12:54 AM
–

Gay men aren't bothered about sex with women. Sex is not a motivation, for gay men, to be friends with women and yet they still "bother" to have women they care about in their lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/23 12:39 AM
–

Gay men have female friends, family and community. Boom... stupid point completely disproven.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/23 12:29 AM
2

There are whole fields of study on gender and they manage to actually address the diversity of human experience and expression. Generalizations to the point of absurdity is the only way you can talk about TRP because that’s all it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 08:27 PM
1

If you can’t have empathy without knowing exactly how a person feels then that means no one can feel empathy for anyone else. You can’t know how they are feeling so… no empathy. That’s such a dumb understanding of what empathy is it’s kinda frightening.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 07:10 PM
1

You don’t think any women feel sex is fundamentally important to their emotional health? Really? That’s so easy to disprove. I googled for two minutes and found dozen of articles written by women about how important sex is for emotional and physical well being.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 07:02 PM
1

If it was true that you can’t have empathy for someone because you can not know what it’s like to be them…. Wouldn’t that make empathy impossible? You can’t know what another man feels like, not really, you can’t know what women feel … so wouldn’t that mean empathy is completely made up? Or is it that you can absolutely have empathy for people you do not fully understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 06:46 PM
1

I'm demisexual so I only really develop sexual attractions for people I know, like and respect and that can look a lot of different ways. But I tend to find chubby/bigger guys are the ones I feel drawn to see if maybe they are people I like. ​ College is a shallow time. I hope you get better friends and better community.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/23 09:01 PM
2

How old are you? It sounds like you are trying to hook up with, and are friends with, immature people. ​ My across the room type is a bigger guy. None of my friends have ever given me any shit for it. Because they aren't childish jerks.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/23 06:11 PM
5

I can tell when men are standardly attractive. That doesn't mean I feel attracted to them. I'm demisexual so I'm not attracted to people until I get to know them and like who they are as people. And what I find attractive when I love someone is a pretty wide range. ​ Women are people, and people have a pretty board spectrum of attraction response. Some people are shallow and really have really strong aesthetic preferences. Some people don't feel sexual or romantic attraction at all. Some people …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/23 09:48 PM
2

My thoughts? "Look at these idiots. Are all their followers 12?"
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/23 09:43 PM
2

All your "evidence" is about gender ratios. Nothing about hook up culture or trust. In fact you list two school with the same gender ratios with very different described hook up cultures. ​ Why would you think this proves your title? It has nothing at all to do with your title.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/23 11:13 PM
4

Well then they are doing their job of contributing to society just fine by playing video games.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/23 01:34 AM
5

I would not expect a dude to protect me, attack someone or chase down my property. In fact if a dude was my friend or partner I would want him to back off and not get harmed. ​ You were the one generalizing about "disagreeable men" if you don't like that generalization stop doing it. ​ The men in my life are amazing. Who is the black and white thinker when it comes to "true masculinity".
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/23 12:02 AM
7

I think the world would be a lot better off if "disagreeable men" shut up and played games. They won't, unfortunately. ​ Just because you feel safer knowing you can call big bad cops to protect you doesn't mean everyone else does. But hey, if you are worried about being in the world without these big strong disagreeable men... then I'm glad (for you) your hypothesis is completely wrong and it's mostly depressed men who sit around and play video games and step away from participating. Which is sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/23 11:47 PM
9

I thought you said that "disagreeable men" were going to stop trying and play video games. So which is it? If they are high earners who worked there way to the top they aren't just giving up and playing video games (although good on them if they are). ​ We've never been short on "masculinity" in fact we are better off without the kind your talking about. If men want to use that rage to play games our whole culture will be better off for it. I don't want more men ready to grab guns and shoot peop…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/23 11:07 PM
10

What is the issue with men sitting at home playing video games? If given the pressures of our culture that's all they want to do... what is the problem? We clearly don't need those men to make our society work. Why be upset that they get to do something they enjoy instead? And no one has to deal with "disagreeable men". Win/win if you ask me.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/23 10:32 PM
7

Seeing misogyny online makes me all the more grateful for all the amazing men in my life. Dealing with misogyny in real life (I work in a male dominated field) just makes me tired and more firm, it makes me both less submissive and less compliant. I need hard emtional boundaries around real life misogynists because I need to keep working with them to accomplish my job. Thankfully there aren't that many but boy howdy is it unfun and a lot of extra emtional work to keep dealing with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/23 05:10 PM
6

If that was true ugly short dudes couldn’t be red pill. Shy virgins couldn’t be red pill. It’s a ideology not a type of man. That ideology only has one valid type of man but the idea that men who are red pill are traditionally masculine is obviously not true. Desperately want to be more traditionally masculine? Sure. Deeply upset that they aren’t more traditionally masculine? Absolutely. Victims of people making promises to make them more traditionally masculine? Obviously.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/22 08:47 PM
4

And you think ‘blue pill’ is shy feminine virgins? You aren’t using these terms in a way that anyone else is. Red pill isn’t a type of man it’s a type of thought. Red pill men aren’t any more likely to be masculine, tall and stereotypical handsome.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/22 08:37 PM
4

If you generalize red pill as tall good looking men and nothing else sure. But that media for you. People like good looking people. What red pill really is are dudes who are obsessed with gender and shitty about women. And these dudes aren’t that. So which is it? Is ‘red pill’ an ideology? Or just hot men?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/22 08:17 PM
5

Let me prove how all people work with these fictional movies!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/22 08:08 PM
17

Being cautious of new people is how i end up with awful people not being close to me in the first place. Gender is not really relevant. Shitty harmful people come in all genders. ​ I don't walk around scared of random people. I develop good boundaries and don't invite people who push on them closer to me. It works extremely well and I don't spend my life in fear. Seems like a waste of energy.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/22 11:05 PM
1

Even if it is true (which with 1000 people how could it possibly not be impacted by the nationality, the ages, the generation, ECT ECT ECT because 1000 people isn’t nearly wide enough a poll to get a handle on 7.8 billion people) isn’t that saying that 19% of women do get pleasure from casual sex? So 2 out of 10 women. Doesn’t seem that small of an outliner. When you generalize the way you do you end up with nonsense mush. People are diverse. It’s one of the neat things about people. Trying to d…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/22 09:28 PM
4

It proves that men are different and want different things. Almost like generalizing down gendered lines when it comes to the diversity of human attraction and desire is pointless and stupid.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/22 09:17 PM
4

So ‘men’ are in fact different from each other and want different things… shocking…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/22 09:01 PM
10

I hooked up with people at my school. At parties. At raves. And yes I would approach and start conversations. If the goal is to hook up, starting conversations is an obvious first step. Plenty of men on this sub say easy women are gross. Aren’t they saying they are less aroused by a woman who will jump into bed with them? I think it’s pretty normal for trad guys to be tuned on by someone who is proving to them that they take sex seriously. It’s not that radical of a kink for people who want old …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/22 08:49 PM
12

Eh, generalizing down gendered lines this way is just silly. When I was having casual sex it was absolutely about how hot ‘getting casual sex’ was. It wasn’t about the dude at all. And there are plenty of men who are MORE aroused having to work for sex. People have different responses to sex. Different things that arouse them and turn them off. Pretending all of humanity fits neatly down gendered lines around something as wildly personal and diverse as sex and desire is going to make you really …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/22 08:40 PM
30

Hi I’m a woman and I do not think all men will rape me. What a wild, unattached from reality, take that is. The vast majority of women do not think all men are rapists. When you generalize on this level all your arguments become meaningless mush.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/22 08:08 PM
10

One of the reasons why I asked the OP what he meant by ‘rude’. His post literally means nothing at all without addressing what he means by that. I think women going ‘batshit crazy’ over ‘rude’ men is pretty fucking rare. Just like it think women being horribly rude to men and writing that off as fear or rape is pretty fucking rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/22 07:19 PM
41

What kind of rude are you talking about? Not being up for talking to a stranger doesn’t mean I think they are a rapist. It means I don’t want to talk to a stranger. If women are being consistently ‘rude’ to you for simply saying ‘hi’ my guess is you are approaching women without understanding the social settings appropriately.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/22 07:10 PM
4

Well sure. If anyone in my family (or my friends) came to me and said ‘hey I don’t think this dude is good for you’ I would hear them out and think deeply about what they have to share but I think that different then ‘involving’ only my male family members in my partner selection process.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/22 10:07 PM
9

What my brother or my father want for me isn’t the same thing as what I want for me. Would you let your mom and sisters nix someone you are dating?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/22 10:01 PM
1

7 long term relationships, although one was just 9 months so I don’t know if I would count that personally. I’m 38 and I’m poly, so six of those relationships have some overlap. I’ve been with my current three partners for 18 years, 12 years and 7 years. One ended after about two years because we were teenagers and I figured out I didn’t want monogamy. My first poly partner and I broke up after 9 months because he was awful and awful at non monogamy. My next partner that I broke up with was afte…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/22 07:36 PM
11

I don't want creepy dudes who are hung up on their partner's sexual past (or the past of strangers who have nothing at all to do with them) to get over it. I want them to keep spouting their nonsense as loud as they want. It makes it easier to avoid them and less likely that they will end up having sex or in a relationship at all. ​ No one should be forced to be in a relationship or have sex with anyone. Attraction is personal. Some people are shitty people so their personal attractions reflect …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/22 09:09 PM
7

tax laws
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 11:50 PM
2

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRmRNJHa/ Jesus Christ kid read a book instead of watching trad thirst traps on tiktok: https://www.amazon.com/Dawn-Everything-New-History-Humanity/dp/0374157359
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 10:34 PM
1

to the extent of turning down blow jobs? ​ Dude you are so far into fantasy land you can't even guess at reality. There are some wild takes on this sub but "men don't like blow jobs" is a new level of silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 08:54 PM
8

I have never, not once, had a dude turn down a blow job. ​ Bad sex is bad. But sex isn't one person who is "good" at it and the other that gets sexed. Sex is a dynamic between two people. If you keep having bad sex it's probably because your fucking people you aren't actually attracted to, or who aren't actually attracted to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 08:51 PM
1

Or you could reach outside your area. The place I’ve found almost all my adult friendships are working together at burning man. There are lots of gatherings all over the world that bring people with common interests and values into the same spaces to work and play together. I ~highly~ recommend it if you are looking for community and friendships.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 12:07 AM
3

Dude your the one saying the average guy don’t go outside much and don’t have large mixed friend groups. I know a lot of average dudes with both of those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 12:02 AM
2

I’m an older millennial myself. It’s one of the reasons I cultivate collaborative social hobbies and spend time and energy developing my community and friendships. It’s not as easy as when we were kids but if you value it it’s not that hard, given time.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/22 11:58 PM
3

Yeah I think it’s extremely normal for people to have friends that aren’t limited to one gender. It’s really telling of who is on this sub that this is shocking news .
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/22 10:20 PM
4

Why do you all think so little of average guys? Average guys have friends. Men who fail at having friends of an entire gender are below average, at least socially.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/22 10:18 PM
4

Nothing screams "I'm a super healthy dude" like not having any friends of one gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/22 09:45 PM
15

Gosh you guys don’t think much of men. Maybe it’s an age thing? But the men I know have plenty of male friends and female friends. Is it that you can’t picture healthy people at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/22 07:22 PM
12

The idea that you wouldn’t know that someone thinks your entire gender is ‘the oldest teenager in the room’ is really on spectrum. Just because a LOT of red pill men can not tell what people think or feel doesn’t mean I can’t tell when someone thinks I’m a child because of my gender. It’s really not subtle guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 06:13 PM
8

I’m polyamorous myself. I only date/fuck other people who want polyamory for themselves. Poly folks are sex and relationship nerds. It’s not a bunch of rich Chads with harems. Just a bunch of horny relationship focused dweebs. And I say that lovingly of my fellow poly people.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 06:01 PM
4

Most of the toxic femininity things get under my skin. Learned helplessness. Being competitive with women instead of seeing them as full interesting humans. Also just shit human characteristics like being shallow, lazy, entitled. Which I don’t like in anyone but it stings a bit more in women.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/22 05:49 AM
1

Mature adults don’t let a made up sky monster dictate their lives and desires. The answers to all your questions are ‘because sex is enjoyable, fun, and about as wholesome it gets. Just good quality bounding time that feels good to everyone involved.’
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/22 06:13 PM
1

So just doubling down on making stuff up. ​ Do you have any real numbers for the gender break down of poly people? No. ​ You are such a classic red pill shill. You can't even see you are making shit up.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 09:34 PM
1

Because our culture creates gender norms where men are expected to pursue. ​ And I never said women have an easy time or that all men struggle. It's a limited dating pool. It's much harder to find people who are poly and have matching or compatible relationship desires. ​ You still haven't made one point that isn't you making things up whole cloth.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 09:26 PM
1

I don't know any poly men with more then 3 partners. More then three sexual playmates? Sure. But partners? That's pretty rare. ​ You just make up shit. Honesty. You have no hard number. You don't know how many poly people are queer and you are wrong that mono men want to date poly women. Would you sit around being mono with a partner who had multiple partners? Come on. ​ You have a vague passing impression of poly and a horribly distorted view of gender and romantic connection because of the red…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 09:18 PM
1

Nope I think it's easier for women to find partners because our culture enforces gender norms. The population of the planet is close to equal down gendered lines. ​ Men can be gay and bi... wow... you are bad at remembering what queer people are. ​ Also these number are still 100% out of your ass. I know this is common in red pill nonsense, but you understand that made up numbers don't prove anything? ​ And again how are poly women dating poly men have anything to do with mono men not having par…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 09:07 PM
1

... so you completely make up numbers pulled out of your ass and forget the queer people exist. I'm not shocked.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 08:59 PM
1

Monopolizing the small number of women who want multiple partners? But the women they are with can have more partners if they want. ​ You really don't understand polyamory, even in passing. ​ I thought mono men didn't want to date poly women in the first place? How would poly men dating poly women be reducing their dating pool at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 08:42 PM
2

It's easier for women to get multiple partners for the same reason it's easier for women to get multiple sexual partners. ​ The women I know who are poly, including myself, are absolutely interested in having multiple partners. Why would they be poly otherwise?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 08:32 PM
2

Do you know any poly people? ​ Because it's way easier for women to end up with multiple partners then it is for men. And you understand these aren't "soft harems" they are multiple full romantic relationships where everyone supports their partners doing the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 08:25 PM
0

Because everyone is open in polyamory. I have three male partners. They have more then one female partners. It's not just one dude with a bunch of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/22 08:11 PM
2

What's your point? ​ Some people cheat for sex, some people cheat because they are insecure and feel great "getting one over" on another guy. One isn't better then the other. I mean I guess cheating as a power move on a dude you don't know is kinda sadder then cheating because your horny. But the idea that people never cheat for sexual pleasure is stupid.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/22 09:22 PM
2

"I want to cheat because it gets me off" ~You ​ Copy that. But men are not a monolith. Men cheat for all kinds of reasons. Just like women. They cheat because they can. Because they actually fall in love with someone. They can cheat to get back at someone. They can cheat accidentally. They can cheat out of pain, angry, fear, laziness. They can cheat out of horny-ness. ​ People are diverse and you are making it harder for you to understand people by trying to say all of any gender act any one way…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/22 09:12 PM
3

I'm an adult, I don't play head games with my partners. ​ I'm non monogamous so I expect all my partners to handle any jealousy they run into with care and respect. Just like I do. I take it as a very bad sign if someone I'm dating can't regulate their feelings well. If they are actively showing me they are jealous (instead of talking about it) then they aren't mature enough to be doing the kind of relationships I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/22 08:35 PM
9

Absolutely . Unless he's in porn then the porn is going to involve people who are physically different then him.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/22 07:44 PM
19

I've never had a dude mind that I watch porn. Not once.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/22 07:40 PM
1

If you don't have any proof that people are thinking this way then you don't have an argument at all. Just your feelings about how you think people think.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 07:43 PM
3

I'm not addressing if marriage is reasonable. As I've already said I'm against marriage. ​ What I disagree with is that it's common for women to both hold the idea that women don't need men AND be pressuring men for marriage. And since you haven't provided any instances of this actually happening... isn't on you to prove that it's a thing at all? Otherwise isn't it just your feelings? Where is your "reason"?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 07:12 PM
4

I thought this sub was for debate, not your feelings. ​ I feel like you don't have even passing information on this topic and therefor your opinions don't matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 07:01 PM
2

I agree, that's my question. ​ Are there examples (or numerous examples as this is being presented as a common attitude among women) of women expressing these conflicting ideas? Or is it that "women" the entire gender, prove to have different and conflicting opinion about all things, including marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 06:58 PM
2

So you are saying "sure I could present a real argument but that is ~hard~ so I won't be doing that and instead just assume that my statements are true". That's a pretty bad argument. And it's an absolute failure of a debate. ​ I'm vehemently against marriage myself. I'm not sure who you are trying to convince. Is your post about women being hypocritical? Or about marriage being bad? because you aren't making a coherent argument for either.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 06:56 PM
3

Find me a post where a person is expressing both. ​ Because yeah, of course there are women who want to get married and of course there are women who don't. But people being a hypocrite about that are going to be few and far between. Not saying they don't exist. But to say they are common is just kinda silly. You are conflating different women with different opinions with "women". Which is why it's confusing for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 06:29 PM
2

Sure sometimes people are hypocrites. Gender has very little to do with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 06:25 PM
12

You understand the the women who are frustrated that their partners aren't purposing aren't them same women who are saying "women don't need men"? ​ Women are not a monolith. Some of them really desperately want marriage. Some of them hate the concept. It's almost like half the population of the planet will differ in their opinions from each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 06:13 PM
1

I don't find poly to be sad. I have three loving mutual partners. It's pretty wonderful.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/22 03:09 AM
3

For broken people who never experience mutual love or attraction, sure. You can choose to make life transactional it's just a sad choice and it means you'll never know what it is to be loved or desired.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/22 02:59 AM
1

If you think that way sure. If you can’t step away from the idea that relationships are nothing but transactional then of course it’s realistic it’s just painful and dumb and not good for any kind of relationship you ever managed to trick your way into.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/22 02:49 AM
2

Well if what you get privileges yourself I’ve your partner then it’s scummy. You have a very immature idea around what life is about.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/22 02:42 AM
1

A dude thinking he deserves to have multiple female partners while not doing the work to support them having multiple male partners (or if any genders she is attracted to) is misogynistic. It’s a dude deciding he deserves work he is unwilling to give in return simply because of his gender. Women don’t deserve the same thing that men do… ta da misogyny…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/22 09:56 PM
1

Because relationships are nice. And sex is nice.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/22 12:48 AM
2

Eh, it’s really not for everyone. It works great for my partners and myself. Monogamy always made me feel trapped. Even when I was wildly in love. I want the freedom to let connections find their own level. And having multiple long term committed relationships is just lovely. It’s been working great for my entire adult life. But yeah, it’s not for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/22 12:40 AM
4

You are stretching so hard. ​ And DUDES are the only people who have talked my ear off about crypto, but nowhere to I say "men" or "all men" or "most men" or "only men" ​ "MOST" is about an over-talked topic in my city. And "very often" is about capitalists. ​ You just see man haters everywhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 02:17 AM
7

Or you are just bad at reading for context and project "man hater" onto any woman who posts.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 01:53 AM
3

Where did I say men are selfish and money Hungry. I was explaining why I don’t enjoy certain topics. I never said all men talk about those topics or that only men talk about those topics.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 12:49 AM
7

Where did I say men are selfish and money hungry? I said those topics aren’t interesting to me and why. And fuck off about drones I’m not talking about people who are passionate about them, I’m talking about rich dudes who purchase them and play with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 12:09 AM
16

I know a lot of men whose hobbies are gaming and TV. ​ I don't think this is a particularly gendered thing. People are diverse. A bunch of them are going to be boring to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 07:38 PM
13

Maybe it's who you are dating. ​ My female friends are endless interested in the world around them. We talk for hours and hours about "things". Otherwise we wouldn't be friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 06:33 PM
34

"a desire to know about things" means a desire to know about tech, the economy and investing? ​ I am very interested in "things". I am fascinated by history, art, politics and philosophy. Do I want to set myself on fire when dudes feels the need to tell me about crypto? Yes. Do people who often talk about investing or economics prove to be shitty capitalist? Very often. Is talking about a investing boring as fuck way of drooling over money? Absolutely. I live in SF and "tech" is the MOST over ta…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 06:10 PM
5

Not shocked.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 09:38 PM
6

How old are you? ​ I knew some bi guys who thought that way until later in life and then kinda threw it out the window once they got over themselves a bit. Horny-ness is the great equalizer.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 07:41 PM
3

I've dated bisexual men and would again.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 07:39 PM
1

It’s cool. It’s a good look in a boomer.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 12:30 AM
0

I don’t care if you sound ignorant. Just giving you the heads up. It makes you sound really old and really out of touch.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 12:26 AM
1

There are more open relationships now then in the past. At least more people willing to say they are open. I’m a woman and wanted polyamory. I think as it becomes more of a visible option more people will do it. But TONS of people want monogamy. Non monogamy requires a bunch of emotional work for most people that folks aren’t up for. Monogamy will likely be the most popular relationship shape for the foreseeable future. But non monogamy is certainly on the rise.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 11:26 PM
0

That’s an ignorant opinion. You should educate yourself. Not for poly people we don’t give a shit… just so you don’t look so uninformed.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 11:17 PM
1

Read your first comment again. And re-examine what ‘flying off the handle’ is.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 11:10 PM
-1

Congratulations! You must have some understanding of long term relationships and commitment. Maybe educate yourself a little more and you won’t come off as ignorant.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 11:04 PM
-2

I’ve been in my relationships for 18 years, 12 years and 7 years. How long has your longest relationship lasted? You being ignorant doesn’t mean everyone else is.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 10:58 PM
0

Poly can be very much committed. My poly relationships are deeply committed and long lasting. It’s not commitment vs non commitment when it comes to polyamory. It’s commitment to one person vs commitment to more then one person.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 10:50 PM
-3

It works well for some of us. I much prefer to have committed long term relationships then casual disposable ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 10:48 PM
1

Sure most people actually look better at 25 then 20. You look like an adult now.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 01:16 AM
1

Okay so you are a social guy who handles it fine and are having a harder time in life right now and are more attractive. Honestly that really sounds like the difference between being 15-21 and being 25. You just are more attractive. You've been through more. Your smarter. Your more mature. You are an adult. ​ I don't think your specific case means much to men in general. You have no idea how it would have been on you if you hadn't been social during those years.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 01:10 AM
1

So you are social and you are successful sexually and romantically. It took you a few years longer then you were expecting... but other then that? Aren't you saying that being social works? Living with your grandparents and dinking doesn't mean you aren't being social... so I don't quite get it. You seem to contradict yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 01:01 AM
5

Age gaps don't necessarily mean there is a power or maturity imbalance. Often older people who seek out much younger people are seeking immaturity or are simply immature themselves. Which is fine, just not a long lasting thing as the younger person is going to continue to mature quickly and the older person is likely not going to mature as fast. ​ Age gaps don't guarantee that there is a harmful power imbalance just like dating someone your exact same age doesn't guarantee that there isn't a har…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 08:37 PM
3

I work with and teach and am teammates with a bunch of autistic people are are social equals to everyone around them. ​ This mostly sounds like you feel "autism acceptance" means that anyone who says they are for it will like you and treat you well. That's not true in any movement. You are not autism. You are a person with your own unique combination of personal traits that include autism. So when people are accepting (or are trying to accept or are pretending to accept to look good) nero divers…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 01:11 AM
3

It matters to some men. Just like it matters to some women that their partner is tall. ​ The idea that it matters to "men" is just a silly attempt to shame women who like and get sex. Guess what? Those women do not care. They are doing just fine. There is no shortage of dudes who want to fuck them and build relationship with them. Shocking I know, but some men like women who like sex. ​ People are diverse. "men" aren't a monolith. Neither are women.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 01:03 AM
9

I don't know anyone who is pushing for "autism acceptance". But I have noticed a lot more people talking about it. More information about it. More openness and understanding towards it in education. More people actively accepting the label. More people asking questions about what its' like. ​ I don't think we are to "acceptance" but like... dude people used to just say "kill all of them" and people didn't know anything about the spectrum and the different ways it could look. I now have autistic …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 12:58 AM
1

I would. My partners have other partners. It’s polyamory it works for a bunch of people… and doesn’t work for a bunch of others, just like monogamy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/22 02:38 PM
1

Yes. I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/22 01:58 PM
5

Yeah. I've had sex with four people in the past five years. Three of them are long term partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/22 12:48 AM
2

Four. Three are current long term partners (18 years, 12 years and 7 year) one was a bad choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/22 12:29 AM
2

What is your definition of "toxic masculinity"? If you want to address what it is and how it impacts people then you need to start with a clear definition.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/22 07:33 PM
3

And you are a good looking dude? And have never been single going to a swing club? I notice you say nothing about how attractive you need to be for kink... funny. ​ You know what it is, why scare people away? It's not a hard scene to get into if you have passing social skills and a working dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/22 05:25 PM
7

Lol, and do you think RP and sexual market dynamics end just because you're in a kinky club? They're put on steroids. Rule 1. Be attractive, rule 2. Don't be unattractive. ​ Spoken like someone who has never seen the inside of a kink club. Kink is full of sex nerds. It's not a cute kid club. A young dude who is interested in kink can find a lot of partners to play with. ​ And yes, you need to find the right swing events if you are single male. ​ The social sex scene isn't nearly as hard to get i…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/22 05:00 PM
12

If random hook up sex is his focus I would tell him to get into the socially sexual scene. Get good at kink. Get comfortable with swingers. Maybe go to burning man. Getting a bunch of random sex is about what scene you are in and if sex is your main focus? Go hang out with the sex nerds. That or just get good at having the right kind of drugs.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/22 04:05 PM
5

The sun is flat! Just look at it!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/22 01:05 AM
1

How soon into a relationship is it possible to feel love for your partner? I only date people I know very well as friends. If I want to date them? I'm basically already in love with them. How long into dating before you should say “I love you” for the first time? Very fast. Like basically right away. Sometimes before we've even been on a date. How long should a relationship be to be considered an LTR? I would say over two years. How long before you should know whether you want to marry them/ spe…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 02:04 AM
6

Anyone who wants multiple partners needs to do the hard work of supporting their partners doing the same. Otherwise they are a piece of shit. ‘Best guys’ aren’t pieces of shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 06:31 PM
2

And the they all clapped I’m sure
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 02:52 PM
9

I have three "right guys" at the moment. Being poly is probably the biggest stumbling point for most people. I'm not trying to sell myself. And I'm deeply unappealing to the vast majority of Red Pill dudes. I'm a feminist. I teach social justice at a university level. It's really a nightmare for angry internet dudes.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 01:07 AM
6

I'm good with people. I am kind. I interested in the world. I lead an interesting life. I'm active. I'm good at my job. I'm independent and get paid well. I'm decent looking and deeply enjoy mutual sex. I am a part of of hard working and engaged communities of neat people. ​ But the people I'm a "catch" for are really rare. People who are compatible with me are few and far between. I'm not a "catch" for almost anyone. I'm just really really good for the people I am right with.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 12:59 AM
0

Hahahahaha Where have you "proved" your point? What is even your point?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 05:23 PM
1

They are getting paid so they aren't volunteers. ​ And even with all those hard working men, there is nothing for them to do without plans, people organizing them, large big picture project managers and a bunch of interconnecting fields and trades all working together. ​ The labor is unless without the plans. So...
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 05:12 PM
1

You are changing to subject because your argument is bad. ​ A city takes tons and tons of people doing a diversity of work. It's not simply hard manual labor. And again, MOST men that live in cites don't do work to build or maintain them. ​ I'm all for glorifying our manual laborers. But people still need to make and design plans, we need to organize huge numbers of people, we need medical and support businesses. A city doesn't work without a metric shit ton of people doing all kind of necessary…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 05:01 PM
2

Eh, I think it's silly to say "these jobs" build and maintain the city and no women ever do them. Because it's deeply untrue. And you are skipping past a TON of work that is required for a city but isn't dangerous manual labor. ​ And the fact is the MOST men that live in city don't do these jobs either.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 04:18 PM
1

How is deep sea fishing necessary for building and maintaining a city? ​ If deep sea fishing is needed for a city, surely educators, health care workers, administrators, lawyers, city planners are also needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 04:01 PM
1

But which of those build the city they are in? Not oil rigging. Not deep sea fishing, not mining, not wear house work. Dangerous doesn't mean fundamental for building and maintaining the city they live in. Hell a bunch of these jobs mean they do not live in a city at all. ​ I could argue that it takes a LOT of desk jobs to build and maintain a city, long before a city needs deep sea fishing.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 03:32 PM
2

Which jobs? What are you counting as necessary?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 03:08 PM
3

I teach at a University. By your standard of ‘I do things that impact the city at some time and some place’ I also build the city. Your argument is pointless. Cities are millions of people. You are trying to say only men build and maintain them. That’s silly. Either the city is the infrastructure, and then you don’t build it and most men do not. Or the city is a big ephemeral thing that we are all building together and then gender has nothing to do with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:59 PM
3

Where am I treating anyone as scum? By pointing out that most jobs aren’t building or maintaining a city? That building or maintaining a city is a dumb standard that doesn’t prove your point at all because the vast majority of people who live in a city do not do that. Including huge numbers of men… including yourself apparently. I’m saying your point is bad. I’m not saying people who do manual labor are scum. you had to change what we are talking about because your point is so bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:53 PM
1

Factor work is necessary? We’re you building city infrastructure? Was your metal working on bridges? Or buildings? Or are you just like women and showed up to a built city and labored under capitalism and probably contributed nothing to the city?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:44 PM
1

No. But are those the only jobs you need to make a whole city function?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:38 PM
7

So have I. Have I ‘built my city’? no. So what manual labor did you do that is so fundamental to your city being built that women never do?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:23 PM
6

Is hard manual labor all it takes to build a city? But also yes I know women in road work and construction and in electrical. Also you haven’t answered if you build your own city. Or are you just like all the women and show up to a built city and live in it?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:16 PM
3

So I take it you actively build the city you live in? No men just show up to a built city? And no women do any work to build or maintain a city?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:11 PM
6

I'm poly. My partners have other partners. I have other partners. I have no issue with my partners having other loving and sexual relationships. ​ If a someone wants multiple partners they need to be ready to do the hard work of support their partner/s doing the same. Otherwise they are lazy assholes.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/22 03:50 PM
2

I make enough money. I like treating people.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 01:58 AM
6

An investment in what? Her shit later? ​ A dinner isn't an investment. It's dinner. No wonder men feel owed sex. " I INVESTED in you" when you bought a chick dinner.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/22 10:07 PM
7

Why on earth would you assume "the female" will think about you more if you pay for the date? ​ If you are buying attention hire a professional. If you are on a date? Date the way you want to. Spend money the way you want to. Buying dinner is a shit "investment".
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/22 09:34 PM
13

I'm not sure why you think women will care that you have stopped paying for dates. Good! Don't do it if you don't want to. There are a lot of ways to date. ​ Buying someone dinner isn't "investing in them financially". It's a date, not legal paperwork. I would much rather that everyone on dates spend money the way they want to. Acting like women have lost out and we should be pissed at other women because some dudes won't automatically pay for dates? is silly. ​ Personally I like paying for date…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/22 09:06 PM
2

Lump all of a gender together. Your reading can’t keep up with my ideas.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 08:44 PM
1

emtional regulation in heighted circumstances is some of the best protection you'll ever get or be able to give.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 07:32 PM
1

How do I know you are fantasy LARPing? I base it on your post and responses. You called yourself "head of security". You talk about home invasions. The ideas you hold around the protection of your partner are a silly gendered fantasy. ​ I really don't just shit on men. I love and admire men. I'm lucky to have lots of wonderful men in my world and I don't do dumb shit like lump all of a gender together. I shit on TRP because it's dumb as hell and harmful to the people who believe it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 07:30 PM
1

To be fair while I was cussing the guy out my friend did steal his bike. Ha. But that is not "protection" it's just funny. ​ And when I've been in real danger I do not want it to suddenly become more dangerous. I do not want to see my partner get into to a fight. I don't want to see my partner physically harm someone or be harmed. If my partner is physically present I want to be allowed to handle the situation and ask for help if I need it. The issue about "protection" is often it's jumped to wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 07:21 PM
2

I think YOUR protective instinct is LARPing. I’m not talking to ‘men’ in general I’m talking to you. I have many wonderful relationships with men. Disagreeing with one silly dude on the internet is not having an issue with an entire gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 07:04 PM
2

So I'm a bigot because I don't agree with you? Because I don't have any issues with men in general. ​ I understand where your coming from. It's just a scared place that doesn't reflect on how most healthy dudes are in relationships with women. That's the LARPing part. You have to hold this fantasy in order to feel safe. I get it. But it's not being a bigot to point out your ideas are silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 06:51 PM
1

I've got a really good partner. And I'm perfectly prepared to take care of myself if someone gropes me. It's been happening since I was a pre teen. Watching my partner get into a fight doesn't help me at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 06:44 PM
1

Sure I do a lot of things to help people I care about. It's this idea of "protect" that is your issue. ​ In relationships (at least in healthy ones) we are interdependent. Partners help each other, not because the other is incompetent and can't do something for themselves, but because it's easier to do life with more people. ​ As for hoping things stay peaceful? How does your LARPing gear do that? Does your gun and tactical vest actually keep the peace? Or is it just a way for you to feel safer?…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 06:40 PM
2

Where am I being a bigot? ​ You called yourself that, my dude. That is playing make believe. That is LARPing. You are not Head of Security of anything. The fact that you think of yourself that way is part of the LARP.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 06:34 PM
1

This is LARPing. ​ This is what I mean when I call you a LARPer. Guns make homes less safe not more safe. You have a power fantasy of protecting your partner but here is a hint... you will NEVER have an active shooter in your home and if you do? Your guns will not protect you. ​ The thing I find so silly is you don't even do these things. No one has ever broken into your home. You have not protected a partner with a gun. It's a fantasy in order for you to feel more valid while belittling any par…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 06:31 PM
2

"head of security" hahahahahaha! How is that not LARPing? Head of what security? ​ Do you hand out cards titled "head of girlfriend security"?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 06:14 PM
2

I do live in a bubble. But I also live in a city that people claim is massively unsafe.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 06:11 PM
1

Women's rights are in danger because of the shape of society (hint hint: it's a society that thinks of women as children). ​ Society is what creates protections and standards for all of us. Men aren't keeping women safe. Our collective society helps keep us all safer (including men.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 05:57 PM
1

I love men. I have lots of amazing men in my world. The men in my world respect that I can handle myself and do not frame their existence and ego around protecting me. I'm an adult. The men in my world respect me enough to treat me that way. ​ Dudes who think it's their "duty" to protect women are insecure, childish, LARPers who really do their partners a disservice or who seek out incompetent partners so that they feel safer.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 05:54 PM
1

So what? ​ How does my male partner being shot first help me? ​ If my male partner has a gun in our home he's already made our home much more unsafe for myself and for him and for anyone who enters it. ​ Dudes who think they can handle active shooters are the people who end up murdering their neighbors kid or shooting their partner. Guys who think like that make everyone less safe.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 05:38 PM
2

You're not strong and independent, you just benefit from a world MEN MADE SAFE. So do you. You, personally, haven't made this world safer for anyone. PEOPLE make this world safer collectively. And not just men. ​ Again how many times have you risked your life for your partner? Is it none? Because the world is actually pretty fucking safe? The things we need protection from are big societal things and that protection comes form society not from your dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 05:33 PM
1

Do you think most men can? ​ Because no, most PEOPLE can not handle a armed home invasion. Just like most PEOPLE can not handle an active shooter. These are extremely rare circumstances and dudes like to pretend they have the skills to handle but almost no one does.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 05:18 PM
8

People's continued freedom depends on all kinds of people. ​ Your dick doesn't make you a hero. ​ The idea that the moment we don't have laws that all women will be enslaved is an insecure boys fantasy. It's a thought terminating cliché wrapped around a hard, lonely, angry penis.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 05:16 PM
4

I read your post. It's silly garbage. ​ How many times have you had to protect a partner with your life? What is this fantasy land you live in that you need to be on guard to protect your partner all the time when she obviously takes care of herself the majority of the time? Do you hire security for her when she goes to work? Or goes out with her friends? ​ I've certainly handled confrontations with assholes while my partner let me handle it. Because I can handle myself and there is no need for …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 05:09 PM
2

I check on bumps in the night just fine without waking up my partner. I sleep alone just fine without my partner. Like I said, I’m a fully functional adult. If my partner didn’t think of me that way he wouldn’t be my partner. Seriously do you not know that many women are single and live alone? Many create relationships with people other then men. Women aren’t children that need protection. And it’s fucking obnoxious when men think women aren’t capable of protecting themselves. She was alive when…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 04:51 PM
14

Most of them. What do you think is happening to women who don’t have male partners? Or whose partners aren’t glued to their side 24/7? Adult women function fine in the world and do not need protection like they are a lost child. WTF kinda LARPing world do you live in that you think adult women constantly or consistently need protection from their male partners? How do these women go to work? Who protects them when they are on the job? Or do you think women just don’t leave the house without big …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 04:37 PM
5

I would be pissed if my male partner suddenly decided I needed protection. I’m a perfectly functional adult. The idea that it’s a man’s ‘duty’ to protect me is fucking obnoxious. I only date men who understand that I am a fully functional adult who can take care of myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 04:06 PM
77

That women aren't actually attracted to their normal looking partners. And that all women would bang a guy in a heart beat if he has a strong chin and is tall.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 09:21 PM
3

Beggars and van life people absolutely still participate in capitalism. Everyone is forced to participate. Even people in countries that say they aren't capitalistic. If you buy anything then you are participating. It doesn't matter if someone gave you the money.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 05:54 PM
2

I'm not saying you are an anti-capitalist. But intersectional feminism is. So maybe you aren't an intersectional feminist?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 05:49 PM
3

Lots of people are anti-capitalist. Being forced to participate doesn't make someone a supporter.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 05:48 PM
5

Feminism aims to shift the goal posts of the patriarchy to woman’s benefit. They do not aim to change the fabric of patriarchy, if anything, they aim to become the focal point of the systems that patriarchy produces. You don't know feminist if you think this is true. Are there shitty capitalist feminists? Absolutely. But intersectional feminism is absolutely anti-capitalist.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 05:14 PM
18

Feminists assumes that womanhood, in of it self, makes you a good partner by default. citation needed. A lot of feminist I know date women... so they are well aware that being a woman in no way makes you a good partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 03:56 PM
11

Because if white people weren't around we wouldn't have art, music and philosophy? Dude, you are over valuing white people. ​ Also you do understand that non white people are a part of european and western culture?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 03:27 PM
3

Dude I’ve been doing this for 18 years. I have three long term partners. One for 17 years, one for 11 and one coming up on 7. They have other partners. It works extremely well for a bunch of us. Monogamy isn’t for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 01:46 AM
3

I’m not trying to convert you. Just letting you know that you have a shallow understanding of it. ENM isn’t for most people. For you it would suck, that’s normal. That just doesn’t mean it sucks for everyone. It works a lot better then monogamy for a bunch of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 01:27 AM
3

Your opinion about the thing you know nothing about is useless. But you know that.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 01:08 AM
3

Also like those red pill dudes you are severely underinformed around topics you feel very comfortable talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 11:45 PM
3

I figured out I didn’t want monogamy when I was 18. Since then I have never dated a monogamous person. I’ve never opened a mono relationship. Again, it’s almost like you don’t know anything about non monogamy.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 10:14 PM
1

I think polyamory, as it’s practiced by almost everyone who does, is nothing more than a layer of pretentiousness added to what used to be called swinging yeah, you really stayed on the "for me" thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 09:22 PM
1

I was in poly and open relationships for a time. I stopped when I was confronted directly with the stupidity of it and the pain that it causes. But it wasn't polyamory that caused that pain. That pain came from cheating in monogamy. I don't expect anyone here to apologize. You are just framing your bad actions and the harm you caused as being about polyamory... when it clearly wasn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 09:05 PM
2

But that's just your failure. Polyamory didn't do anything. You just sucked at switching back to monogamy. Polyamory didn't make you cheat. You didn't put any work into transitioning back into a different relationship shape. Polyamory didn't break your brain. You didn't think to do needed work.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 08:56 PM
2

None of that explains why you think polyamory caused the stupidity and pain you cased by cheating. Polyamory didn't do anything. You cheated. Just because you were switched to monogamy and didn't do the work to take care of that mono relationship doesn't mean anything about a different type of relationship. ​ There are happy and functional poly relationships. You cheated in monogamy. These things are unrelated.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 08:44 PM
2

So you don't think any non monogamous people date other non monogamous people? You assume they are all force reluctant mono partners to open? It's almost like you know nothing at all about ENM.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 08:24 PM
5

So you cheated in monogamy and then decided that was somehow another relationship shapes fault? Interesting take.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 08:01 PM
3

Poly is hard. And people do it very badly, just like monogamy. ​ I don't think it's an orientation. I think it's a relationship shape. But to pretend there aren't people don't do it well just because you were bad at it, is silly. ​ People do monogamy horribly all the time and folks don't say monogamy is a lie.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 07:39 PM
2

I've been in long lasting highly functional poly relationships my entire adult life. Just because you did it badly doesn't mean others also do it badly. Polyamory is about loving the people you have sex with and building relationships with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 07:33 PM
8

I'm not monogamous. What I mean when I say that is that I have multiple partners and we all agree and support each other having multiple partners. The kind of non monogamy I do is polyamory. But there are a lot of different types of non monogamy. So just saying "i'm not monogamous" could mean anything from "I am single" to "I cheat" to "I live in a cult where we all fuck each other" to "I'm a relationship anarchist" to "I am a swinger" to "I have a hallpass from my partner". ​ There is a lot of …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 07:27 PM
3

I wasn't suggesting fake friends. I was suggesting the labor of getting a life and making real friends. It's much easier to date if you have friends. ​ Nothing is a guarantee. At least if you make friends you'll have friends and something you enjoy doing.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 12:50 AM
0

Yeah you aren't going there to hit on them. You are going there to do stuff and make friends. This isn't a work around my dude. This is getting a life. It's so much easier to find people who want to date or fuck you when you have a life. Dancing is a great one. You want to be surrounded by women? Take some dance classes.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 12:28 AM
-1

Honestly nerdy hobbies work great if you find the right ones. But I understand that men who are bitching about OLD being "to hard" aren't going to put in any kind of real effort. If a repeated finger movement is "to hard" making friends is obviously way to hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 12:10 AM
-3

Find thing you are interested in that are somewhat social that have women involved. Then go do those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 11:51 PM
-1

So they pick the absolute worst platform of OLD for dating, for men. Sure. If you are using Tender to try and be lazy and get out of meeting people in person, then yeah, it's super hard. ​ Tender is made for men who want a partner in one click of a button. And stupidly don't notice that women just don't use the platform in numbers. It's not hard. It's really easy not to get a date. ​ Go meet women in the real word. Go make friends and community. It is hard. But it's what people do when they don'…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 11:34 PM
1

If you aren’t fighting to support men and men’s rights as much as feminist are then… maybe shut up about feminism? They are doing your causes more active good then you are.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 05:56 PM
6

So ‘wow that’s really sad’ works fine? Because you didn’t have to respond.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 05:32 PM
13

Wow that’s really sad. I see men provide emotional support all the time. To partners, to friends, to family, to co workers. My best friend drove up to comfort me after a a bike accident. My partner spends hours on the phone with his mom and brother as they deal with struggles in their lives. I’ve even seen the two dudes I make a podcast with holding each other and crying after a friend died. How do you not know any good men?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 04:02 PM
2

Seems like this whole sub is obsessed with sexual desire and expression. Why not be interested in the complexities of it? Sex and desire are neat.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 11:27 PM
4

Im demisexual I think people who need to develop emotional connection in order to be attracted struggle with internet dating. I have friends, family, community a ton of people I know I like that I want to spend time with. Meeting up with a stranger I will have a 1 in 10000 chance of feeling attracted to is just a lot of effort to hang out with someone I probably won’t like. I have no problem finding partners but I don’t date because it’s a waste of time and not fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 05:21 PM
3

You think women are looking at TRP to get their standards? Wow… you guys do live in a bubble.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 04:23 PM
3

You are super scared dude. You are so scared of people vaguely bending gender roles that you lash out like a cranky child. Your not scared of death you are scared of things little girls like. Like the color pink. That’s how deeply scared and insecure you are. That’s an abnormal amount of fear.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 07:33 PM
3

You are so scared of painted nails you have the threaten to kill people. Yeah, you seem super secure.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 07:24 PM
2

Oh no ‘nail panting’!!! Will someone please think of the children! Kids before puberty are a lot less concerned about ridged gender roles then you are. It’s not harmful for boys to play on a pole or to paint their nails. Is your masculinity so fragile that some paint on your nails would destroy it?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 05:53 PM
1

A couple of my trans friends are overwhelmed by people who fetishize them. They can't be on dating apps because of the sheer amount of people who want to bang them because of their particular arrangements of body features.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/22 09:03 PM
1

What have you done about it? What work have you put in to support men and boys in our legal system? Because chances are, it's nothing at all. And that means feminism is a much better advocate for men and boys then you are. ​ Men whining about feminism when they do absolutely nothing for other men, and their rights, is hilarious.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/22 05:38 PM
1

What have you done to help men getting unfairly long sentences? Have you campaigned? Have you tried to make legislature change? Have you worked directly with prisons to help provide safe early releases? Feminism is doing a fuck ton more then you are. So how about you do a little research before deciding that feminism doesn’t take direct action.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/22 05:02 PM
2

Feminist are at the heart of the prison abolition movement. When I taught in male prisons it was through a feminist organization. Just because you haven’t looked into it doesn’t mean feminism isnt involved in direct action.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/22 04:53 PM
8

So... all the movies I listed aren't massively popular and part of the culture because Disney also makes movies? Come on. That's a real weak argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/22 05:12 PM
9

What about every single blockbuster movie that has come out in the past 5 years? Is marvel, James bond, top gun, which ever version of Jon Wick or Taken just came out... not glorifying strong, assertive male providers?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/22 04:56 PM
3

yeah, I think most people dress for themselves. What makes them feel good. For some women that is looking very appealing to others. For some women that's basic comfort and flexibility. People are diverse.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/22 04:36 PM
10

By making friends and being in community with others. Getting to know people so you know if you like them as a person, instead of just if you would happily fuck them. Basically stop dating and go do things in the world with people and get to know them.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 07:08 PM
1

I never said they were all about us taxes. Taxes happen all over the world. ‘Unpaid labor’ has not been debunked. Just because you don’t like those links because you don’t like the words they use doesn’t mean they are incorrect. You just don’t like anything coming from a feminist perspective which means you discount meaningful work because you have a knee jerk reaction to words that tigger you.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 03:17 PM
0

The average woman gets married at 28. So your time line is absolutely incorrect. Almost like it’s a completely unsupported TRP talking point designed to say mean things about women and pathetic things about men. I know… shocking.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 08:03 PM
4

https://www.oecd.org/dac/gender-development/44896295.pdf https://www.ohchr.org/sites/default/files/Documents/Issues/Development/IEDebt/WomenAusterity/GlobalAllianceTaxJustice_2.pdf https://www.imf.org/external/pubs/ft/fandd/1997/03/pdf/stotsky.pdf
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 07:12 PM
5

https://www.oecd.org/dac/gender-development/44896295.pdf https://www.ohchr.org/sites/default/files/Documents/Issues/Development/IEDebt/WomenAusterity/GlobalAllianceTaxJustice_2.pdf https://www.imf.org/external/pubs/ft/fandd/1997/03/pdf/stotsky.pdf
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 06:38 PM
8

They pay more. Women are taxed specifically for being women as well. things like period products that women need to function are taxed. So this thing you are so scared about happening to men? Is already happening to women. I know you’ll get up in arms about the deep unfairness towards women.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 06:31 PM
7

They actually end up paying more taxes then men who make the same amount.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 06:18 PM
6

Women actually pay more taxes proportionally to their income than men do.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 06:18 PM
3

So you are moving the goal posts. ​ First it's that men struggle to date. Now it's that men aren't in good enough relationships. Maybe take a minute think through what your point is, and try to make it clearly, instead of weaseling around because you don't have a solid understanding of what you are trying to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 08:06 AM
3

More stupid bullshit. ​ You saw two relationships and now KNOW that men in relationships are all unhappy, so they don't count. ​ You can't even keep to your OP. Are men struggling to date and get in relationships? Or are the struggling to meet your standards of what you think dating and a relationship should be while you are projecting all over them?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 07:50 AM
9

More working age women than ever are single and childless and most will remain that way for life So women are struggle the exact same way as men. Thanks for agreeing. ​ Straight men and women get together. So if men are struggling to get into relationships? Women are having that exact same struggle. Be anger that casual sex is easier to get for women all you want, that doesn't change the fact that men and women get together and if one gender is struggling with getting into relationships BOTH gen…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 07:46 AM
6

So you know all men and if they are happy. Yep checks out. Real big brain on you. ​ This one of the massive silly problems of TRP. You just project your made up bullshit onto all men. "If he's married he's unhappy and not getting sex" "If he is with a hot woman then he's paying for it" ​ It's just bullshit to help angry dudes get rage boners and hate the gender they are attracted to more. It's stupid and incorrect.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 07:41 AM
3

Oh so "men are struggling" because you have decided they are. Not because of how many are in relationships or are dating, but because you've decided for them that those relationships and dates aren't good enough for you. Odd and inaccurate way to build your world view. But that is the heart of TRP. So... good for you? I guess? You fit into the disempowering, self harming echo chamber well.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 07:30 AM
7

Yes trot out that Okcupid study from what... 2006? And use that to say men aren't capable of dating and women are to blame. That study has nothing at all to do with men getting into relationships or dating. It has to do with women judging men on a dating platform with no other information about them then a picture. ​ Straight men and women get into relationship with each other. For every man not in a relationship? There is a woman who is also not in a relationship. It's the same struggle. Why is…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 07:22 AM
3

Then chill out and work on yourself until you 30. Problem solved.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 07:19 AM
13

You really think all men are that big of losers? ​ Man TRP thinks really badly of men. ​ I know a lot of men, short men, fat men, average looking men, middle aged men... they all date around just fine. It's only TRP that seems to think all men are so incredibly bad at dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 07:02 AM
8

Heterosexual relationships are typically one man and one woman. So the same number of women and men are ending up in relationships. Every heterosexual women who is in a relationship has a dude who got his ‘foot in the door’. It’s the same struggle. If you talking about access to causal sex that’s different. But relationships? It’s pretty obvious that men and women both have the exact same struggle.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 06:54 AM
15

The common experience is for people of all genders to struggle to find partners that work for them, to grow, develop and learn and then find a long term partner. Sometimes those partnerships suck. That has a lot more to do with the individuals exposer to other relationships and personal struggles then it has to do with gender. ​ It's normal to feel less then happy about this struggle. What isn't helpful is blaming half the population of the earth, for this struggle, simply because they are the g…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 06:33 AM
8

How about we don’t celebrate racism and people who fought for slavery? ‘Loser’ is a lose term. Racist is less so.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/22 03:41 AM
1

So you agree that Sarah is a made up fantasy to piss off men. I’m glad we agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/22 02:28 PM
1

There is nothing wrong with being a virgin. What is wrong is being so pissed off about it that you end up hating the gender that you want to fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/22 02:27 PM
6

You married someone who made you wait for sex? And that worked for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 05:53 PM
3

I am also telling you that you are wrong in your claim that this never, ever, ever, EVER happens, EVER. You are saying this has never ever in the history of the world happened. I am telling you you are wrong. Where did I say any of that? I said Sarah does not happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 05:52 PM
3

Sarah does not happen. That isn't saying no woman has ever waited to get married to have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 05:52 PM
7

So no... it's never happened to you but you still want to promote it as a common way for women to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 05:47 PM
7

I just didn't know men were that dumb I guess. Why would any dude date someone like that? Do you not want to have sex? Do you want to marry someone when you do not know if you are sexually compatible? Just wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 05:46 PM
5

...and you dated her? Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 05:45 PM
10

Waiting to have sex with someone you are dating is a long ass way away from saying you won't have sex until you are married.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 05:43 PM
4

I've dated women "as a man does" and I know a ton of women. ​ Are you saying you, personally, dated a woman who was saving herself for marriage but told you how she used to have a fuck buddy?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 05:42 PM
6

Naw, TRP just projects it's own fears outwards and then sees it everywhere. This is not a common thing. It's a way to piss off sad virgins.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 04:48 PM
13

Bullshit. Absolutely made up. Such silly lies to. ​ I am poly. The women I have sex with and date are poly. But I know a ton of women. And I have NEVER ran into one that stopped having sex and then wanted to get married before having sex with the person they want to marry. That isn't how anyone works. ​ This idea that the world is FULL of women who want to get married to someone they do not want to fuck and use religion as a way to hide that is lazy, TRP propaganda so dudes can be even angrier a…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 04:45 PM
11

How many women do you know who had sex but then stopped having it and demanded that their partner wait for sex until after they get married?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 04:39 PM
12

No it's not. No one says "I'm going to wait for marriage" simply because they had some shitty one night stands. They may say "I want to get to know someone before he have sex". But if a woman wants sex? She is going to want to have sex before she gets married to someone unless she is deeply religious.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 04:38 PM
23

Yes. I am saying a woman with a sexual past suddenly deciding to stop fucking and wait for marriage is made up by TRP people to piss men off. If a person went through a deep religious conversion they would be dating people deeply in that religion and she certainly wouldn't be telling the person she was dating about her fuck buddy. ​ Sarah does not happen. She is a tool to piss men off and push them further into loathing women and blaming them for all their unhappiness.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 04:36 PM
84

Sarah is so made up it hurts. She is the red pill straw woman who was made up to bitch about women having a sexual past. And Shawn is an idiot to ever agree to dating someone with the intent to marry them when he has no idea if this person will ever actually want sex with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 04:23 PM
4

Sure it is. You want to know how not to be a jerk and have multiple sexual partners? It’s by being honest, clear and sharing the information a person needs to make informed choices about who they fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 05:17 PM
26

This. Be honest and clear and seek women who want the same things. It’s not rocket surgery to not be a jerk and have multiple sexual partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 05:14 PM
1

You didn’t answer my question.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 06:55 AM
1

How does that have anything to do one gender perpetuating gender essentialism
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 06:43 AM
3

Individuals of any gender are not the issue when it comes to socially imposed gender essentialism.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 02:46 AM
6

Women don’t. One gender is not responsible for harmful gender essentialism.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 02:40 AM
6

My partner cries at beautiful dance. Is moved by philosophical thought. Is angry at injustice. Don’t blame women for our cultural suppression of male emotions.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 02:09 AM
8

Yeah it’s really easy to project what you like onto everyone. It doesn’t mean it’s correct.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/22 06:53 PM
33

"Women" are half the population of the planet. They like all different types of sex. Just like men. I can enjoy rough sex with someone I know and deeply trust. I don't want some dude who I'm just starting to have sex with to be rough, it's scary. The last thing I want to think while naked is "holy fuck how well do I know this guy" which is exactly what I think if someone is getting rough with me early on in our sexual connection. ​ Also the most amazing orgasms I have had were really dedicated s…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/22 04:50 PM
1

This disparity allows women to be insanely selective ​ And yet women end up with abusers. Ugly men. Dirty men who don't do basic hygiene. Men who don't get up from their computer for sex. Have you ever read r/relationships ? It's is FULL of women (and men) talking about awful relationships that they do not want to end. So no... women are not being insanely selective. They just aren't selecting you.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/22 05:38 PM
4

Hi! I'm polyamorous. I have three long term partners. I've been in relationships with them for 17 years, 11 years and coming up on 7 years. Yes we really love each other. Remember just because something wouldn't work for you doesn't mean it doesn't work for others.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 05:27 PM
6

Poly women also have multiple partners themselves. This post is just talking about harems, not polyamory.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 05:25 PM
2

And that still doesn't mean that 20% of men get all "the sex". ​ The vast majority of sex that is happening is happening in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 02:34 AM
9

If a woman is using sex as a means of attaining an alternate goal, then it isn't really sex. Right, but you are 100% incorrect in that definition. And you are doing TRP thing of assuming women don't actually want to fuck their partners. Which is just a thought terminating cliché wrapped around a hard, angry, lonely penis.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 01:21 AM
8

I thought if he "bribed" her it wasn't sex? ​ So anyone who has bought a woman a drink, or took her out for coffee, or made dinner for her is not having sex. ​ You know, it's starting to make sense. No one has had sex! No wonder everyone is so upset!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 01:13 AM
12

Okay but they still had sex to get that STD. It's in the name right there. ​ You are shoving the definition of sex around to say shitty things about men and women. It's a wild use of your time.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 01:08 AM
9

"most people" use the normal definition of sex. ​ Do you think people go to their doctors with questions about their sexual health and say "oh I've never actually had sex because I always pay for it" ​ Come on dude, that's a lazy and bad argument. Use your words correctly and try and make it again.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 01:04 AM
12

Oh well that's your issue. You are using a deranged definition of sex. If you use words differently then what they actually mean you end up saying nonsense all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 12:57 AM
15

You know most people in relationships have sex more then 5 times a year? And the majority of people are in relationships. ​ You seem to think only casual sex with one off partners is "the sex". You are missing the vast majority of sex that people have.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 12:56 AM
13

What is "the sex"? Do you mean willing partners? Or regular relationship sex? Because most people get a ton more sex while in relationships. It seems really unlikely that 20% of men are having 80% of "the sex" when the vast majority of "the sex" is in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 12:51 AM
1

Oh there is nothing lazy with abstinences or condoms. Not getting on birth control because you expect your partner to do it is lazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 02:50 AM
1

So you are saying most men will be lazy and expect their partner to take the burden of birth control they are unwilling to take? You don't think much of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 01:17 AM
0

You are probably right. But some of them will do it! And it's a great thing to have available to men who can handle the ego blow of their sperm not being viable. ​ I assume they think the Alphas can smell if your swimmers are strong.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 01:16 AM
1

Then you understand why "if you don't want kids just don't have sex" doesn't work for a LOT of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 01:12 AM
1

I think you are underestimating how compelling sex is.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 01:09 AM
1

Because you don't want to have kids, right now, with this person or at all. I guess I find playing with life creation to be much more irresponsible and long term damaging.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 01:04 AM
1

Why do you see it as playing with your fertility? These would be tested and FDA approved drugs. I understand that can be a bit scary especially when it's new... but women do this all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:59 AM
1

And these could be the same. If you could get one shot that would keep you sterile until you got another shot... would you do it?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:53 AM
1

Most people don't use female condoms, they don't protect against STIs the same way condoms do. And I know a lot of women who carry condoms. ​ I agree male birth control and female birth control aren't equivalent. For one thing male birth control isn't tested and available yet and women have a lot of options past "the pill" in a way that men won't, yet. ​ But you, yourself said "men will take measures to greatly reduce the risk of having kids.". Why does that not extent to getting a shot once eve…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:48 AM
1

So laziness and fear to do the thing that women have been doing since the 70s?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:38 AM
1

So men will take measures to greatly reduce the risk of having kids... why would reversible male birth control be any different?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:36 AM
3

We do not really need it. Oh so it's out of laziness, fear and lack of ability to do risk assessment. Got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:29 AM
2

There are plenty of men who would care about having a way to extra make sure they don't knock someone up. It's really wild to me that you wouldn't think so. I get it casual sex isn't for you. And you can avoid most circumstances where you would need male birth control by knowing and trusting sexual partners and the standard female birth control that is available and abortion access... but even with all those things sometimes men end up with kids they do not want. Why wouldn't a guy want a way to…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:25 AM
2

Also men generally don’t go to the doctor for routine checkups anyway, though I think that’s changing I hope it is. It doesn't seem to be an issue for the men in my life who have health insurance. ​ Because casual sex is inherently stupid and disorganized. ​ I disagree. I know way to many people who have their shit together who really enjoy casual sex. And I agree it is risker but isn't male birth control a great way to make it ~less~ risky? One fewer risk?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:19 AM
4

Stop being gross. You're the one who brought up chemical castration like that was anywhere in the ballpark of male birth control. ​ No. Most men will not risk they remain infertile by using an untested product when they know they may change their mind about wanting kids. It being tested.... so it will be tested? And this is reversible, that's the point. You can decide you want to have kids at any time, stop taking it and be fertile again. You know, like most women's birth control. This would be …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:12 AM
1

It's a every three week shot I think. I haven't dug into it. There is one they are testing in India that is a one time shot and then another to restore fertility. ​ And I’d venture to believe that men who are on a sexual conquests with strangers could care less still about taking the pill regularly. ​ Why do you assume that someone who is having casual sex is incompetent? Taking a pill once a day isn't rocket surgery. Fuck boys aren't inherently stupid and disorganized.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 12:06 AM
2

I guess as a woman the hard and annoying work of figuring out what birth control worked for me was fundamental to having sex. Because I don't want kids or to have an abortion. It's WILD to me that men wouldn't want that option. ​ Condoms fail to frequently and so many guys have sex with women they barely know. I am always worried for my male friends who have a lot of casual sex. ​ I also agree with you that being on the same page as your sexual partner is the safest way to have sex. It's just a …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 11:59 PM
2

So it's mostly fearing taking a medication?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 11:52 PM
6

So sex with condoms is the same as sex without them? You don't ever desire to have condom free sex. ​ Also condoms fail. What happens then? ​ not get temporarily chemically castrated So it is an ego thing. I figured. Also chemical castration is really rather different then effectively male birth control. But I get it, it's very scary that you would be shooting blanks even if you don't want kids. People will be able to tell that you aren't a real man, somehow... and that is rough.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 11:50 PM
3

So you would rather have no say in if you create life after you cum? ​ I thought TRP dudes HATED that women could keep pregnancies that the men did not want? So you would rather not have sex or have a kid against your will? Man TRP is all over the place.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 11:32 PM
2

So you don't want more say in if you create life? ​ I agree that dudes can do all those things. But a dude can do two out of the three and still end up with a child he doesn't want and now has to support for the rest of it's life. You would really think dudes who want to have sex and do not want to have kids (right now, with this person or ever) would actively want a way to opt out. ​ I assume it's an ego thing, or a lazy thing... ​ If it isn't ego driven or just lazy what is it? Why wouldn't yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 11:28 PM
5

So having sex with or without condoms is exactly the same amount of pleasurable to you? And you fundamentally trust anyone you fuck not only to be honest but to be consistent AND to be ready to abort because no birth control is 100% effective? I'm a woman and I've always been deeply relieved that I get the last say in if I bring a pregnancy to term. It's always been wild to me that men take those risks when they don't get a say after ejaculation. It seems crazy to me that men wouldn't jump on th…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 11:16 PM
13

Have you read all these TRP men bitching and bitching and bitching about women having the only say in abortion and that men should be able to abort parental obligations? Those dudes would be idiots not to get on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 11:00 PM
20

Only people with attachment issues want partners that make them feel bad. It's not particularly gendered.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 06:17 PM
1

I said misogyny is not helping for men who aren't getting laid. And if a dude isn't getting laid... he would most likely do better if he didn't think badly of the entire gender he is attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 10:55 PM
1

If you are ~good~ at hiding your radical political opinions you are a kind of person regular people aren't prepared to defend themselves against. I doubt you are actually that good. Do you really think a woman you date wouldn't pick up on the fact that you think that all women are basically teenagers? I get that some women for reasons of attachment damage are into that... but like, it's really really easy to spot.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 10:35 PM
1

They are sexually incompatible. If he feels like he is going to miss out he should go find someone to date who wants the same kinds of exploration that he wants. Why she doesn't want the kind of sex he wants doesn't matter. He would be in the same exact amount of incompatibility if she had never explored kink and didn't want to.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 05:47 PM
20

But studies have also shown that women who are not mothers end up miserable Citation needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 05:26 PM
3

Yep that’s the simplistic view you would have
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 06:53 AM
2

You do know that men have estrogen and women have testosterone right?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 06:46 AM
2

Saying all women are like asexuals is crazy and dumb my friend. ​ I'm an outliner for sure but the idea that women as a whole just don't want sex is ... silly and naive.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 05:03 AM
2

Yeah. And I knew how good it was when I found real intimacy and sexual compatibility.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 05:00 AM
3

Nope it was for sex. ​ I really wanted to fuck. I was just itching to fuck. Even when it kept not being good. Clits can be dumb like that. Just hoping maybe the next person will be magic for some reason. That and I could always jerk off to the memories.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 04:56 AM
2

In my experience sex in a relationship is way better. If I wasn't as horny and dumb when I was young I probably would have figured that out faster. But I'm glad I got the experiences I did.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 04:54 AM
6

well it sure as hell feel good without nerves then. ​ Look, you not wanting sex doesn't mean others don't. It's fine that you are asexual and only use sex as a way to get support. But like, the vast majority of people have a dive towards sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 04:53 AM
3

Being horny as funk? Not having other options? ​ My casual sex was between the ages of 16 and 21. I was dumb and horny and fascinated by sex and didn't have any experience with orgasmic sex. It's not that I didn't like it... it was fine. I would go home and jerk off after. I would think about it to get me off other times. It was just nothing like what sex became when I started fucking people I actually loved and was attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 04:49 AM
2

I don't like casual sex. I had a bunch of it because I fascinated by sex and casual sex was available to me. But in general it wasn't good sex. But I was still driven to keep trying. Once I found that sex with people I actually liked and who respected me was SO much better, I stopped having casual sex. But there was completely a period in my life where the sex I was having was not organismic, not particularly fun or comfortable and I still pursued it at every chance I got.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 04:42 AM
8

Hi I'm a woman and sex was very much an aching need for me. ​ I figure it's probably still a need but now I have access to plenty of it so it doesn't feel so desperate. ​ I think most ~people~ experience a deep fundamental desire for sex. They won't die without it but boy are we driven to try it over and over again.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 04:36 AM
9

There are a lot of ways to be a hero that aren't doing something for your partner because she can't do it herself. ​ My partner is a hero to me because he cries while watching dance. That's so beautiful and emotionally in touch. It melts my heart. My partner is a hero because he is so damned good in complex emtional situations. He does conflict resolution on my 150+ team of recreational laborers. He is able to articulate boundaries and help people understand each other in ways that allow us all …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 08:48 PM
-1

Agreed. It's blatant stupidity to try and define all of humanity into two, down gendered lines. It's a generalization that is so absurdly board it's deeply unhelpful when it comes to understand how people act. When people hold these ideologies it fucks with their ability to actually see and understand other people.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 05:58 PM
1

Where am I saying women don’t have the capacity to do shitty things? I’m saying AWALT is saying ‘all women are like that’ how is that not saying ‘all women do shitty things’. Some women do shitty things absolutely. Thinking ALL women DO shitty things is misogyny. Thinking all people are capable of being shitty is way different then saying AWALT. Just like if women saying ‘all men are assholes’ is misandry. Saying AWALT is misogyny.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 01:32 AM
1

Do you think that men who think women are ‘the oldest teenagers in the room’ isn’t obvious? Do you think men that know that because they aren’t Chad a woman is using him for resources aren’t obvious?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 12:27 AM
0

If you aren't getting fucked, hating women and thinking they are less then you and that they are all the same... is 100% going to get in your way of getting laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 10:46 PM
1

How about painting women as individuals that are diverse and complex? I don't think all women are wonderful. I think people are diverse and a lot of them are shitty. When you say "all women are like that" you are saying all women are shitty and shallow. Is it hard to understand why thinking all women are shitty and shallow is: "dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women."
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 10:45 PM
1

So you believe that 80% of men never enter a mutually attracted sexual relationship? You believe ALWAT... that "all women are like that" and you think that isn't disdain or prejudice? ​ Or are you one of those TRP dude who scampers backwards in what The Red Pill ideology is clear about and retreats to something like "It's about self improvement"
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 10:11 PM
1

Right yes, because all women are shallow and only date dudes for looks and resources. Geee, how do you think thoughts like that effect how you treat women?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 10:07 PM
1

It was in the original post, my dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 06:51 PM
3

mi·sog·y·ny /məˈsäjənē/ noun dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 05:40 PM
5

Okay what does it mean? And how does claiming adult women are teenagers not misogyny? Because the definitions I find are: mi·sog·y·ny /məˈsäjənē/ Learn to pronounce noun dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women. Thinking all women are teenagers sure sounds like contempt, dislike and ingrained prejudice.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 05:37 PM
4

If they are saying ‘all men are babies’ absolutely. If they generalize about all men and then say shitty things about them, yeah.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 05:35 PM
3

And men not being able to get casual sex doesn’t inherently turn them into TRP or black pill clowns who hate the gender they want to fuck. That’s a bunch of choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 05:34 PM
4

The Red Pill supports and spreads ideas like AWALT and the 80/20 rule and ‘women are the oldest teenager in the room’. How are those not misogynistic ideas. Also of course some misogynistic men get laid. The issue is if dudes aren’t getting laid and seem to think their misogyny has nothing at all to do with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 05:23 PM
7

Misogyny is people who think adult women are ‘the oldest teenager in the room’. It’s not just hate (although I would say hate underlines that idea) it’s dismissal, it’s deciding women aren’t fully functional adults like men. You are saying the men become misogynistic because random women on the internet can’t help them figure out how to get causal sex? And that leads them to hate all women? Why? Why do they think random women on the internet should be able to get them laid and the. Why do they h…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 05:17 PM
-3

The issue is if they are actually a misogynist. Men struggling with dating get a lot of support on other subs. On this sub? Men struggling with dating are Red Pilled or Black pilled and therefore have major issues with misogyny. ​ There are plenty of men who get support and struggle with dating and don't turn it into a world view of AWALT and 20/80 and "women are the oldest teenagers in the room". And when men do that they need to address their misogyny before they have any chance of finding a m…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 05:05 PM
14

People have very varied styles of attraction. It's one of the neat things about people being diverse. Some people are only attracted to people when they get to know someone (Hi! I'm demisexual) and there are some people who will happily fuck anything. There are people with very strong physical "types". There are people with such strong kinks that they matter more then anything else when it comes to attraction. ​ People are a multitude. It's neat. Trying to collapse all people into two ways of be…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 09:52 PM
4

Dude you want nothing to do with me. Im a feminist. Im polyamorous. I don’t want kids. I’m not motivated by landing a man to support me.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 06:07 PM
2

The shallow isn’t because you aren’t attracted to some women. The shallow is that you think money should make up for them not being attracted to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 06:05 PM
4

I’m a fit woman and my across the room type is bigger guys. I have a masters and teach at a university. And the thing that would turn me off about you is how you think about women as a pile of traits. That’s really shallow and super unrealistic. It gives the impression that you aren’t really looking for love with an individual. you are looking for a bunch of checks in boxes that you can wife up to have sex on tap. Do you express yourself like this? Because the issue might not be your high standa…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 05:18 PM
3

What does that have to do with assuming adult women are the oldest teenagers in the room? ​ That's a description of an abuse victim.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 12:27 AM
5

By pussified men do you mean men that think of women as full adults?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 11:43 PM
4

It isn't for anyone who doesn't have a lot of attachment type issues. If a woman is attracted to "old school" men it's because she wants someone who doesn't think very much of her. Lots of people want that for one reason or another. But that doesn't mean it's not obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 11:26 PM
6

Most women can tell if the person they are dating thinks women are the "oldest teenager" in the room. ​ Your right it's "old school" and "old school" thinking like this is extremely obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 11:11 PM
15

I don’t think most men are trash. I think a good percentage of people are fucking awful. But you are being silly if you think Red Pill logic is subtle. And if you’re good at faking that shit then you’ve got some deeper issues that normal well adjusted people aren’t prepared to protect themselves against.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 03:03 AM
39

It's almost like people are a lot more complex then TRP likes to think.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 11:28 PM
0

Yep. I think the term came to be in the 70s.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/22 08:23 PM
1

Ethical Non Monogamy
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/22 08:08 PM
0

I'm not monogamous and still have no desire to have sex with two dudes at once. ​ Also as someone who is ENM trust me that many many many women and men do, in fact actively want monogamy.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/22 08:01 PM
6

It's demisexulity and it's not down gendered lines. But... sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 01:08 AM
11

I trust men who have healthy relationships and good friendships and have female friends and work well with others and myself. I trust men when I watch them behave in kind and caring ways over time. I trust men when I see that their words consistently match their actions. ​ I admire men who are deep thinkers and feelers. I admire men who are kind in the face of hardship. I admire men who aren't scared to be goofy. I admire men who despite our culture aren't racist, homophobic, sexist or transphob…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 12:56 AM
22

I'm only turned on sexually by people I like, trust and admire. And I want to send time with people I like trust and admire. And the sex is way better with people I like trust and admire. It basically takes a type of relationship for me to be interested in sex. I don't need to live with someone. i don't want kids. I don't want monogamy. I don't want marriage. But yeah I need a person I feel safe with, can count on and who I deeply enjoy spending time with. Anything less is shitty sex for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 12:28 AM
2

"these women" are something you made up. ​ Plenty of men are a mess and get sex. Plenty of women who are a mess get sex. ​ And there are plenty of anti social women sitting at home alone not getting sex just like there are plenty of anti social men sitting home alone and not getting sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 07:14 PM
3

Being a mess in early adulthood and not knowing how to have healthy mutual connections is not particularly gendered. Neither is envying your friends (or being worried for them).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 05:54 PM
7

Well that's your wild guess that fits into your really limited world view.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 05:47 PM
3

And guys never feel envy of their friends? Or is it you just assume men don't have friends?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 05:41 PM
7

Some people are mentally and emotionally screwed up. Some of them learn to regulate better with time. It's not particularly gendered. ​ If a woman has friends who wonder what guys see them? They have bad friends and that probably means they have bad self knowledge, self esteem and boundaries. That makes for messy relationships of all kinds. Some people grow out of it. Some people actively seek treatment to make their lives function better. ​ These aren't "bad boys" and "bad girls". They are emot…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 05:33 PM
4

No worries. It’s a really unpleasant idea to a lot of people. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be done with care, respect and deeply mutual and supportive love. I’m really happy in my relationships. And my partners and their partners are to. It’s just a different looking relationship shape. They are also not friendships. They are sexual. B they are also, like monogamous relationship, about a lot more then just sex. Relationships can be more or less intwined. Full wonderful loving relationships don…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 01:42 AM
2

Partners aren’t ‘on the side’. And yes they have other partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 01:40 AM
2

They’ve lasted 17 years, 11 years and 7 years so far. My relationship aren’t based around sex and are completely capable of existing without it. It’s great! But yeah people age and things change. Honestly you just sound freaked out by the idea. Which is fine. Monogamy works great for a lot of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 01:06 AM
3

Yes, three relationships concurrently. It's polyamory. They have multiple partners as well. We all know each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 11:00 PM
1

Yeah. My live in partner and I have been together coming up in 17 years. My long distance partner and I have been together 11 years and my local partner and I have been together for 7 years this August.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 10:59 PM
0

I have three long term relationships. I don't see them ending any time soon. If they stop being desired by the people in them, they will end. But I feel really secure that these connections are long term and that both people are willing to put in hard work if things stop working for one or both of us.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 10:54 PM
1

Also help that is specific to men is out there: https://www.sprc.org/populations/men
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 10:03 PM
9

My life and desires put me at odds with "romanticized view of love that society has prescribed" but it's not because I see love as transactional. It's because I don't want to get married or have kids. Society has an incredibly limited idea love, romance and family. ​ Thinking of love as transactional means you will never feel deeply mutual love. It's a real bad red pill brain worm that wrecks any chance you have of being in mutual connections.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 09:18 PM
5

That was much cuter then any link I have ever followed on this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 09:12 PM
29

We are a spider friendly household. Whoever sees the spider (and isn't currently naked) takes it out. Neither of us do yard work. We both take out the trash and recycling and we tend to do it together so it goes faster. I do all the car maintenance. When we lived in a house that was heated by a wood fire everyone and their dog chopped wood all year round. He knows plumbing better then I do. I know electrical better then he does. ​ Strange noise in the night? Whoever wakes up first. ​ You act lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 08:58 PM
2

On a date? Absolutely.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 09:31 PM
2

I don't think of it as "leagues" because I have been deeply attracted to people who were less standardly commercially attractive. But sure, I've hooked up with people I wasn't attracted to. How did it start? Mostly at college parties. Was it good? No, sex with people I'm not attracted to isn't good sex. Are you still together? No I don't keep dating/fucking people if the sex wasn't good and I'm not actually attracted to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 08:42 PM
15

People who don't ask questions about others aren't particularly gendered. It's a thing some people do. Sometimes it's nerves. Sometimes it's because they have no one else to talk to. Sometimes it's because they are selfish. Sometimes it's because they aren't interested in the other person. Sometimes its a lack of being able to read other people. ​ I run into it in men much more around my professional career then around dates. But I know just as many women who are capable of monologging without a…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 08:37 PM
1

So people who are less good looking can use social skills to date. So for 98% of all people social skills are important in dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 05:41 AM
1

You’ve literally never seen friends get together? Never seen someone get to know a person before asking them out?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 05:20 AM
-1

Sure a very small amount of people of all genders are so good looking they don’t need people skills to date. But it’s silly to then extrapolate that people skills have nothing to do with dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 05:07 AM
5

I’m also in my 30s and in a major city. Also ‘hot guys with the hottest girlfriends’ is really moving the goal posts from ‘dating isn’t about people skills’
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 05:03 AM
-1

How old are you and where do you live?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 04:55 AM
2

And ugly women get the same looks. Shallow mean people are assholes it has nothing to do with gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 03:57 AM
0

Dating is 90% people skills. On line dating has really fucked up your understanding of dating and women. ‘ it’s not about people skills fuck these stupid shallow demanding bitches’ really solves itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 03:56 AM
5

Well that is TRP advice so it's inherently garbage and misses the point. ​ Any exercise can help people feel better and look better and emotionally regulate better. So in this case, TRP takes a glancing blow at some real advice and still manages to make it extremely stupid and limited and for the wrong reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 12:02 AM
9

The two guys you linked look like roided out. I do not think your average woman is looking for a dude shaped like that. I know, personal, it would freak me out. ​ The average ~person~ should get exercise. Whatever exercise that works for them is great. Lifting is a fine exercise. It helps with mental and physical health. Lifting may not turn you into a fitness model, put it will probably have postive effects on your world if it's something you like to do and can keep doing. And it help humans re…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 11:53 PM
0

I don’t wear make up so it is normal for men to wear as much make up as I do. It changes nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 07:07 PM
1

And you think all women are the oldest teenagers in the room. You are undatably red pilled. Congratulations!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 04:04 PM
2

Yeah and it would be obvious that you believe that silly garbage and most women wouldn’t date you.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 03:51 PM
2

Thinking of women as teenagers is not biology.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 03:28 PM
2

Sure but 70 years is longer then you have been alive or most of the women you may attempt to fuck, if you weren’t married, have been alive. 70 years is not ‘new’ in the scale of a human life.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 03:11 PM
2

Only the past 70 years you say… yeah, very new. And very subtle.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 02:59 PM
2

And I’m sure your beliefs are obvious and if you were dating most women would be deeply repelled by your basic lack of relationship for women. Because again, thinking of women as not fully adult is not subtle.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 02:17 AM
7

Then they are stupid. And that is also not subtle.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 11:26 PM
1

Me too. I have a job that takes considerably less time then 40 hours a week 9 months out of the year. I don’t have kids. One of my partners is long distance so I see him 3-7 days every two months or so.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 11:19 PM
1

I’m lucky.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 10:48 PM
3

… so red pill men…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 10:48 PM
7

Men who think women aren’t fully adults are obvious and and terrible partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 10:47 PM
4

Not well they don’t. It’s really obvious if you hang out with a dude for more then an hour.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 09:37 PM
2

Glad to hear it!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 09:35 PM
10

it’s derogatory, on purpose because it’s these men don’t respect women as full adults. If you think a woman is the oldest teenager in the room you don’t think of her as an adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 09:34 PM
43

I think it's funny that you think women wouldn't notice that the guy they are going on dates with thinks they are the "oldest teenager" in the room. ​ TRP is not subtle. When men think of all women is such shitty shallow terms it's obvious and it wouldn't even get to a second date, if they managed to hide it well enough to get to the first.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 07:55 PM
2

Obviously I was mistaken in my choice to have three relationships instead of becoming Batman.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 07:45 PM
3

I dont think most couples are in the former category. If it's two pornstars or swingers than usually that is the norm. But most people arent a part of that group. ​ Hi! I'm not a swinger or a porn star and I do polyamory. All of my relationships are with other people who want polyamory for themselves. It's not at all strange for people to start relationships as open. I think poly people are a lot more common then swingers these days. And as more and more people see other relationship structures …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 06:56 PM
4

I figured out I wanted to do polyamory while single and have only ever dated people who want it for themselves. Yes, it is ~way~ more likely to be successful then opening a mono relationship. A huge part of that is, very often, only one person actually wants it to be open and, very often, the people opening don't actually do the work to do it well and with respect so they end up hurting each other and other people. Not that it can't be done well. It's just a lot more rare. There is SO MUCH press…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 06:42 PM
4

America will cease to exist. I'm glad my polyamory, given to me by the great female hive mind, is doing something so big! I thought it was just the way I wanted to have relationships. But it's actually bringing the fall of civilization. Boy I'm so grateful to have such a big brain original thinking male to tell me what my feminine psyche wrought.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 06:38 PM
7

There is a big difference between different types of ethical non monogamy. If you are opening up because your relationship doesn't meet your needs? It's going to be a trash fire. ​ I do polyamory. It goes really well. Never opened a mono relationship I only date other people who want polyamory for themselves. I have three long standing committed relationships all of them are open. ​ Open relationships can really work for some people. But if a mono couple goes in thinking that they don't need to …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 06:31 PM
6

Wow... that's a new kind of hippie you've got there. ​ I think it's perfectly normal to have distracting thoughts about sex well into adulthood. Sex is a pretty massive human motivator. Easy stretches that fix wanting sex? They mostly involve having sex. Good healthy stretches and exercise.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 08:37 PM
11

Or your a perfectly normal teenager or young adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 08:29 PM
4

Found the racist
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 06:11 PM
1

I have three committed partners. Never had a problem finding people who want and offer commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 03:30 PM
1

And all you guys deeply want monogamy?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 03:22 PM
1

I never said the gender of my partners. And I’m with three people. Because obviously none of you guys would want multiple partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 03:21 PM
0

Just throwing it out there that people who identify as red pill have murdered people. It’s biology.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 06:40 AM
0

Nope. I’m not at all interested in marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 06:25 AM
6

Oh so your asexual. So you got married so HE could have sex. It's still getting married, extremely young, for sex. It's just for his sex not yours because you aren't into sex. ​ It's really not a virtue to put off having sex if you have no personal desire for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:53 AM
5

But like also for the sex... ​ If you wait until marriage you are getting married for the sex at least to some extent.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:49 AM
10

Yeah, cool, good luck. Were you not fucking yet because you were a kid and weren't ready for sex? Like it's pretty normal not to have sex until you are 19. It sounds like you got married to justify fucking.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:47 AM
3

Eh... it was a couple of years of fucking people I met at parties. I know a lot of women who have more partners and plenty who have less. It's just not that big a deal when you date adults who are secure and have had their own lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:44 AM
6

And you got married at 22. So there is that...
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:42 AM
3

It's never been a problem. ​ Also you don't need to sleep around to know it's not for you. I did. But not everyone does.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:36 AM
4

I honestly don’t know. I had a bunch of casual sex from about 17-21. Maybe 20-40 people? It’s been awhile and the sex wasn’t very good so it’s not like it stands out in my mind. It wasn’t very rewarding. I started doing ethical non monogamy at 21 and since then I’ve had 5 sexual partners in the past 17 years. Three of which I’m still in relationships with. Casual sex doesn’t work for me. But I don’t regret finding out that it didn’t and then finding the kind of sex that does work for me. I’ve ne…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:11 AM
7

But sex is nice. And marriage is stupid.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 01:41 AM
14

My body count isn't low. But I basically stopped sleeping with people who didn't actually like me at around 22. I started dated people I already knew and respected where we had strong mutual attraction. ​ Don't fuck people you don't know, like and respect? I think that's the easiest way to be sure. But you could also let go of the idea that somehow you are being damaged by different dick in a way that you aren't damaged by the same dick. Maybe it's healthy to stop thinking of sex and body count …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 01:34 AM
1

Most adult men had sex in the last year. That’s what that stat is.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 10:52 PM
2

A guy who has sex once a year might, in fact, feel great about his sex life and relationship status. And a guy who is having all the sex may, in fact, hate his relationship and how he is having sex. ​ Numbers don't answer those questions. And you are making assumptions based on your world view off of the numbers. We don't know how many dudes are having daily sex compared to once in a year. We don't know how people feel about the sex that they are having. ​ Is the question are men happy with the …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 06:38 PM
2

Sure there is a limit to what we can learn from this study. But a guy could also be struggling and be getting a lot of sex. Sex isn't the only indicator of a dude being happy or feeling successful. When you start moving the goal posts the question becomes completely unknown and you are making assumptions based on your world view about the answers.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 06:20 PM
14

Yeah and women are having sex but how good is it? They are getting into relationships... but are they happy? ​ Most adult men are having sex. So are most adult women. Most adults get into relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 06:04 PM
1

Yes, I agree that you have nailed the talking points of The Red Pill around how women date without any new ideas whatsoever. Full cliche achieved! ​ Is that how women date? Sure some of them... but mostly it's a silly revenge fantasy used to explain happy looking couples where the dude is average looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 06:34 PM
1

A little more then half of women answered this question where? ​ Lots of people are dumb, violent and think with their feelings first. Gender has very little to do with it. You are being just as dumb as they are by writing off all of one gender because of how some people on the internet answered a question.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 02:32 PM
1

Where did I said I was exploited to the worse degree? Saying something should be better doesn’t mean I’m saying I’m personally horribly oppressed. I’m saying labor under capitalism is coercive.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 02:23 AM
1

Just because there are worse places doesn’t make labor under capitalism any less coercive.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 01:08 AM
1

And you think an individual can easily arrange something that is inherently a lot of people and a law firm that is making money off the action?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 12:34 AM
2

What happens if they don't have money in the future? I can understand not wanting to date someone who can't support themselves. I want to date fully functional adults. But life happens. People lose jobs. Tragedies happen. If you are in it for the money... what happens if the money is gone? ​ Also lots of people mention looking for things like "financial stable" "A good career" "ambitious" "from a good family" and no one gives them shit even though they are admitting that money is a part of what …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 07:37 PM
1

Because it is so easy for an individual to sue a corporation or even a medium sized business. Tell me you’ve never been involved in legal action without telling me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 03:49 PM
4

to quote you: As for why, it is because sex is like a hunger for men. When men are sex starved, they think about it like you do when you are very, very hungry.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 12:42 AM
1

Capitalism means the people who built those homes were not paid their worth because profit had to be made. If the people who built the home were paid their worth it wouldn’t make a profit. It would break even and everyone would make more money. Labor only creates profit when it’s being exploited. If people are truly paid their worth no one would be getting rich off them.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 09:51 PM
2

Don't forget some people who are feminists have said shitty things about men and males in general so ALL FEMINISTS hate men.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 07:20 PM
3

"feminism is a hate group" is my personal favorite.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 07:15 PM
7

Someone paying you money to do labor is not oppression, and nothing stops you from starting your own business concern. ​ Most people in 1st world countries, the vast vast majority of them, can not simply quit their job and start a business and survive. Starting a successful business takes a lot of knowledge and a lot of capital. ​ Most people need to work to keep a roof over their head, the lights on and food. The average american household can't take a $500 hit without it directly impacting the…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 07:13 PM
3

This is the most articulate and well stated thing I've ever read on this sub. ​ Buckle up for a lot of "patriarchy isn't a real thing jorden peterson says so" ​ Also these guys are all capitalists. So they system ~can't~ be crushing them, someday they might be rich! How shitty and isolated they are must be a gender's fault.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 07:02 PM
1

"You shouldn't be sacred of me or hurt by me even when I'm actively trying to hurt you because I'm a woman, man up" I also things like learned helplessness, being a door mat, resentment towards other women because of their looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:28 PM
-1

Hey look! Its toxic masculinity.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:15 PM
3

Family would not know about it. I would absolutely tell my partner I would want his support and understanding. But I only date men who also absolutely don't want kids. It's basic compatibility.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 04:20 PM
17

It's like women never focus on getting hot to attract men and men never labor over texts trying to come off in the exact right way. ​ This post is generalized to the point of absurdity. It's not useful.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 12:01 AM
0

Then 99% of the time you are having bad sex. I would recommend you stop until you figure out how to have good mutual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/22 03:19 PM
1

Sex has feelings involved. If I’m upset at someone sex isn’t going to feel good. Mutual pleasurable and desires is the only way to do it. What relationships are you in the you are getting upset at each other all the time? Like how much do you think fighting is the issue for not getting sex? Because maybe you fight to much in your relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/22 03:18 AM
1

Um… not having sex with someone who has just hurt your feelings is not making sex transactional. That’s a ridiculous idea. ‘You have to always be up for sex even if your hurt by me or angry me’ is psychotic. Having sex when you want to have sex, when you feel excitedly have sex is what ~makes~ it non transactional. If I’m doing it just to please you when I do not want to I’m behaving in a transactional way. ‘I want this relationship therefore I will have this sex I don’t really want right now to…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/22 01:02 AM
3

It's actually a very sad and self harming point of view. If dudes believe this garbage they will never experience mutual attraction. Because they will assume that the woman just wants them for their resources. ​ Deeply mutual attraction is the nicest thing we get in this world. Fuckers poison themselves against it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 11:08 PM
1

So you think all women hate and fear male lust? No wonder you have such a bad understanding of women and men and relationships and sex. Marital rape was made a crime because slowly over time women were legally allowed full bodily autonomy no matter what their relationship status was. Not getting rapped is entitlement? I don't think you understand what rape or entitlement mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 09:57 PM
1

Hard disagree. I'm a woman. I have sex because I want sex. Sex is a mutual act between people not a "female resource". Marital rape is a crime because it is rape. How does that have anything to do with if sex is transactional or not?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 09:41 PM
5

I deeply respect sex workers and have a couple of friends who make their living doing it. And transactional relationships blow and they mean someone doesn't actually want or have a mutual relationship to give. If dating is transitional? Then something is fucked up. If sex work is transnational? Then it is normal sex work.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 08:15 PM
19

If you are selling your sex for access to stuff, then yeah, you are doing transactional sex. ​ Do you not like sex? because that's when it becomes transactional. If you enjoy and want it for yourself? Then it's just people who enjoy having sex together. It's mutually beneficial the thing you are getting out of it, is sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 08:10 PM
5

There is the sexism again. Why replace women with one guy other then sexism? Yeah it’s your job to screw people over and benefit unfairly from their labor. You could pay them fairly but you choose not to because you would profit less. Just don’t pretend you are doing anyone any favors by exploiting them.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 11:03 PM
5

That our employment culture is so bad that they are grateful to have even one of the half a dozen things that make for a good job? And you are proud of that? When you depend on their partners to support them? What a way to let yourself off easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 10:24 PM
7

Oh I’m just an employee in the Bay Area so I know exactly how not far 30 an hour 20 hours a week is. You are basically accepting charity and calling yourself a good employer. But your job doesn’t support people. It demands that they have additional support elsewhere. So, not a good job. I love that you try and use your sexism as a weapon ‘what do you want? Me to fire all these women I’m not offering a good job to and hire one man?!?!?’.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 10:08 PM
8

30 dollars an hour 20 hours a week with no health insurance is not a good job in the Bay Area. You are seeking out vulnerable people because you can get away with misusing them. You are depending on them to get health insurance elsewhere so your basically taking charity from their partners jobs health insurance. You talk a big game but then you don’t really offer these women very much at all. Just some flexibility around time. You get away with not paying them the basics and count on society to …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 09:51 PM
9

So you pay them less then a living wage and instead of employing two people with real jobs that provide health insurance you employ four people so you don’t have to contribute. Charming. What was that you were saying about how easy it is to have health insurance? And yet you are going Out of your way to not provide it. To women who are newly back in the work force after having kids… how kind of you. How understanding.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 09:39 PM
6

Do you provide them health insurance? Or do you get around that by employing them part time? Could your employment alone support them and a child? Or because you employe them part time it’s okay to assume they can finish up making a living at another job or two?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 09:28 PM
2

Right because people tend to think of all the money they have jointly is actually each persons. Especially the person who works outside the house.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 07:26 PM
1

Agreed. I don’t think it’s a huge issue. Most men who feel screwed over really aren’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 06:38 PM
19

Dude, do you know poor people? It's not a weak argument. Most US households can't afford a 500 emergency. You think they can pay hundreds of dollars a month to have the opportunity to pay full price for doctors visits and tests? I paid for insurance out of pocket and it was 240 dollars a month (subsidized) and you know what it got me? a 15% reduction of perceptions, full price for tests and visits and if I got hit by a truck they would only take $7000 of my money before expenses being paid to ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 04:48 PM
3

The laws aren't sexist but often the application of them is. It comes down to individuals to set the divorce terms and often those individuals are sexist and tend to rule in favor of women (benevolent sexism towards women). Judges are often old and have dated ideas around marriage and gender. ​ I would be super interested if we could do divorce without gendering the spouses and see if things became more equitable.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 04:41 PM
36

Or you know, one of the 31 million uninsured americans. ​ https://policyadvice.net/insurance/insights/how-many-uninsured-americans/#:~:text=According%20to%20the%20CBO%2C%20the,2020%20is%20around%2031%20million. It's hard to find a job, especially after a long break from working, that is going to provide health insurance. I spent a decade working towards getting a job that had health insurance that was humane, not explicitly evil and that I didn't hate every moment of. I couldn't have done that i…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 04:19 PM
2

I asked you about a feminist you liked. So what does she say that you have such an issue with?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/22 03:32 AM
1

Then you should know how many feminist work for human rights including men’s rights. Name one feminist author that you like and respect if you’ve read so many. I see you are very attracted to the radical anti male feminist of the second wave. How many third wave or intersectional feminist have you tucked in to?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/22 03:19 AM
3

Your welcome to learn about feminist thought any time you like. Instead you cherry pick something from 40 years ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/22 03:08 AM
5

Eh. I think the reason most people ignore that men are abused in relationships by women is the idea that they should be able to take it. Not that they are monsters and deserve it. That is pretty wild take that even 2nd wave feminist wouldn’t buy in to. I’m a feminist and I work with a lot of feminist. Trust me when I say they have a more complex view then men are either ‘evil’ or ‘victims’. That’s pretty 5th grade level thinking.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/22 02:37 AM
2

Hahahaha. Right. Sure. My experience is invalid because because you live in a bubble and can’t imagine it. Charming. I am educated I teach undergrad. I have a masters.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/22 02:29 AM
3

Sure. Much like you I can only answer from my experiences. I live in a bubble like most people. I’m a feminist, I’m a college educator, I’ve worked in prisons… I am around a lot of women who give a shit about men and deeply examine how gender roles harm people.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/22 01:35 AM
7

I can understand that feeling unseen and strange. I can assure you that male abuse is cared about by a lot of people it just still has a long way to go to correct our cultural gender roles dismissal of men’s emotional and safety needs.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/22 08:24 PM
10

Never? I know it to be rarer but in my world women supporting and helping abused men is pretty common.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/22 08:19 PM
12

I've told other women they are being abusive. And I've told men they are being abused. You seem to want to put this big cultural problem completely at the feet of women. I'm saying big culture problems like this aren't a one gender issue. Men and women both fall into the trap of believing in gender roles. And in this case the idea is that men can not be abused by women (or even by other men sometimes) because the male gender role is supposed to be able to take it. It's a sad thing. And it's unfa…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/22 08:08 PM
57

I won't get into the Will and Jada thing because I don't know them. ​ But I have seen men be abused by women. I have warned my male friends when I see it happening. I warn dudes on reddit when they outline the abuse in their posts. My one emotionally abusive relationship was with a woman so I think I'm pretty sensitive to it. ​ I don't think this is just an issue of women not seeing abuse when it's directed towards men. I think it's our entire culture that struggles with it. Men dismiss abuse to…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/22 07:57 PM
2

Sure if asked. My best friend wanted a solid long term relationship but just kept hooking up with the prettiest girls at the party and wondering why all his connections fell apart in a couple of months. ​ I had another friend who just needed someone to say "Yes, she is completely into you, ask her out". But that's about it. Most of my male friends are happy in their current relationships or situations, they aren't seeking out advice because they are doing fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 05:01 PM
3

No. You are conflating the difference between needing other humans with needing a romantic partner to function. We all need other humans. Every adult should be able to function on their own. (With reasonable considerations of disability)
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 02:06 AM
3

Interdependency is the idea that each person is fully functional (in our culture in our society, not like hunt and gather and build yourself a car kinda way). If you can not left by without your romantic partner you aren’t dealing with interdependency just dependency. Which makes one or both of you not functional adults.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 12:27 AM
17

I think your missing an important word: interdependency. Being dependent means you can not take care of yourself. Interdependency is the idea that it’s easier to do it together. You can count on this person to do some of the life work and they can count on you for that in return. Dependency is when you can not function without someone else and yeah, that’s not a great place to be. My partnerships are interdependent with the understanding that each person is capable of stepping up if someone beco…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 12:11 AM
3

It's a one night stand. One night stands can end up bruising egos. "pump and dump" is a stupid TRP and FSD concept so people have more reasons to be pissed at the gender they are attracted to. TRP and FSD want women to be sacred and hurt and not seek out one night stands. Which is why they have such negative and stupid terminology around the term. ​ You know who never gets pumped and dumped? People who only want sex out of sex... or you know, people who pursue one night stands.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/22 12:47 AM
4

I’m all for banning circumcision. It’s awful. That is a protection boys should have. You are right that is a protection girls have and boys don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/22 03:42 AM
6

Single fathers have the exact same support as single mothers. When people get married they are both taking a risk by legally binding themselves together. That’s a big legal risk but it is about income and shared wealth accumulation, not about gender. Women do not have more ‘protection’ then men. They are often the person who makes less money and/or took a hit in their career or became a stay at home mom. When the roles are reversed men get the same ‘protection’.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/22 02:30 AM
5

No man is forced to get married. You are completely free to never marry just like women. You haven’t stated one ‘protection’ that women get that men don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/22 12:01 AM
1

Someone who is divorced can still have healthy connections to people of the opposite gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 11:55 PM
6

So you think if we changed divorce laws to discriminate against women that women would fuck these lonely men? Seems like a wild leap in logic.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 11:53 PM
2

Why? Is everyone who is divorced lonely and sexless or full of fear?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 11:50 PM
3

You are conflating statistics about who files paperwork with who is choosing to end the marriage. Men and women have the same protections around marriage and wealth. So where are all these protections that women have that men do not have, that you feel should be taken away from women so they will have sex with lonely men?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 11:40 PM
9

There is welfare for single fathers and last I checked men can get divorced. No one is making men stay in relationships. Any one of any gender can end a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 10:49 PM
6

What protections do women have that men don’t other then the being the final choice in abortion?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 10:35 PM
11

Regulate society to oppress a bunch of people sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 08:09 PM
0

Which stats?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 08:02 PM
67

Most men are not incredibly lonely and most women are not living in fear. Most adults manage to have healthy connections with members of the opposite sex. It’s just this TRP and FDS stupidity and the echo chamber of Reddit that makes you think these ideas are Normal and prevalent. They aren’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 07:54 PM
1

Your man is terrible if he thinks you are lower for having mutual sex with him. I know dick doesn’t lower me. I enjoy sex for myself. If sex is so devaluing maybe you should stop? Sex makes me feel great. men can get fucked. Which genitals are where has very little to do with it. It honestly just sounds like you have an extremely limited and negative view on sex. That’s a bummer. Sex is the best.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/22 10:11 PM
4

Yikes imagine thinking all women are always passive in sex. And because of that men should treat them like sex workers instead of partner. ​ I ~like~ paying for things for my partner. I'm proud of my work and I'm glad I get to share those rewards with the people I love. I've completely supported my partner when he was unemployed and he's done the same for me. We will take care of each other.... you know partnership?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/22 08:40 PM
5

Wow the men in my life must be remarkable actors. They should start auditioning for tv.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/22 08:33 PM
3

Well thankfully the world isn't limited by your understanding of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/22 11:22 PM
15

Oh so, for the terminally online crowd. An internet stranger saying "break up" based on a post is very different then countless people that have any idea about you or your relationship, at all, saying you should break up with your partner. That complaint is like saying "Countless people have told me to buy surfshark vpn" because you watch youtube.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/22 09:22 PM
4

Unless you decide you aren't up for putting people through that suffering... and then you choose not to have kids. I'm not sure what you aren't understanding here. Having kids isn't inherent. It's a choice. People look at the world, see how rough it is and will become and then choose not to bring life into it. It's a very rational and caring act. You can choose not to do something you want to do. People do it every day.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/22 09:13 PM
6

The next logical step is not to have kids. Your "logic" leaves a lot to be desired.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/22 08:58 PM
10

No it's not. ​ Many people do not choose to become parents at all. Many people don't think about the world they are bringing their kids into. Very Many of them do not think about the pain they are bringing to their off spring by bringing them into the world. ​ "have kids even though you can not picture a good life for them." Is terrible advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/22 08:37 PM
34

Countless people have told you to leave your partner? What? Who is doing that? ​ The only time I've been told, by anyone, to leave a partner was when I was being emotionally abused and couldn't see it. ​ Who are these "countless" people crawling out of the woodwork to tell you to leave your partner you are perfectly happy with?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/22 08:27 PM
31

Those ideas are a fantasy. They have no idea if that person would have been a good partner long term. They are fantasizing, not accurately seeing that they "should have stayed". ​ They don't like their current circumstances and so pretend there were better options. They do not know. These past relationships are with people who are strangers to them now so they can't know. ​ It's like saying "I should have gone to that college I didn't go to" or "I should have majored in business". It's a guess t…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/22 08:04 PM
31

I love pictures of dicks that are either A) from someone who I’m attracted to and sexual with Or B) not about me. Like porn. When you send dick picks to strangers you are making your dick about them. And that is more threatening then hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/22 04:23 PM
33

Some old people resent the hell out of young people for all kinds of reasons. It’s not particularly gendered.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/22 11:21 PM
1

Negative or anti social qualities that our culture excuses (or even glorifies) as typically masculine. things like - repressing emotions ( think it's good and manly not to cry, or express fear or anxiety) - Being aggressive and dominating - heterosexism - strong (or even enforced) adherence to gender roles
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/22 07:00 PM
1

Jordan Peterson hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha never mind. I didn't realize I was talking to a middle school child.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/22 01:08 AM
1

It’s such a huge generalization its nonsense. And gay people’s republic just a vey obvious example of that.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 08:09 PM
-1

The irony of someone who claims to Red Pill saying someone else is coming off as bitter.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 07:30 PM
-2

"Psychology theory" hahahahahahahahaha Then where are TRP dudes actually reading psychology? Or relationship theory? Or gender studies? Naw man, TRP "goal" (if an ever changing amorphous blob of people can have a goal) is to tell men it's women's fault, as a gender, if they don't have the fucking and relationships they want. Exactly the same as FDS with the genders reversed.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 07:10 PM
3

I completely agree. It's shitty to wait to tell someone you are poly and want polyamory. For some mono people it might even be considered cheating if you don't mention that you are already married or partnered.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 07:07 PM
1

I can't do monogamy. So it would have been inadvisable for me to try to do it. It's rare that I find that connection but it's happened numerous times to me over my adult life. I've had eight partners since deciding to ID as poly at 20. While I would pass on the first two (shitty unicorn hunter situation) now. I think six people I'm compatible with in 17 years is pretty great. Especially since I'm still with three of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 06:54 PM
0

I'm honestly very pleased with my partners and not actively looking for anyone else. But if I get a crush? The dude will have most or all of those qualities. And most likely be mono because ENM people are pretty rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 06:46 PM
2

Yeah, I only "date" people I know well and already have strong feelings for. I basically jump from friends to trying out a relationship. And I can't think of anything I find less enjoyable then a standard OLD date.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 06:44 PM
3

I have three partners. I'm not poly because I need more sex, affection, love, dates or whatever. I'm poly because when someone amazing and compatible wanders into my life I want that connection to find it's own level. I don't date because I don't enjoy dating. Why would I waste my time trying to figure out if maybe I'm attracted to this stranger when I have so many people I love and don't get to spend enough time with already?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 06:13 PM
2

Agreed. They use the same tactics for sure. In all honesty I just have more of an issue with FDS... because I'm sexist and think women should be better then that.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 06:04 PM
4

I strongly disagree. FDS is awful. It's just as bad. It's basically the exact same thing. At least TRP is in your face about it's stupid shit. FDS hides behind being pro women. FDS is also vehemently against polyamory. Because I am doing something deeply wrong and harmful to other women by allowing my men to see other women. It's... pretty fucking gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 06:00 PM
5

In which case? It's not that FDS and TRP are 100% wrong. They are just designed to focus on one small pattern of thought when it comes to gender. And it's one that dislikes and doesn't trust the gender they are attracted to. Fully on-boarding either ideology means you don't believe in mutual attraction. And that's a real bummer that will get in the way of ever being in a mutual connection. It's super harmful. Thankfully only to the people who believe it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 05:53 PM
5

Right? The conversation becomes so much more interesting if we look at the patterns people make instead of trying to assign a pattern based on gender. There are a lot more then two types of people in the world. Anyone who has been outside knows that. Which is why TRP gets laughed out of real relationship advice subs.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 05:40 PM
4

Yeah. I wouldn't stay with a poly dude who date mono people. It's mean. ​ My partners are very different then each other in looks and personality but I have found a have a type. And it's introverted, autodidactic, goofy, kind, system thinkers with a dash of reformed scum bag. ​ Compatible with? Other highly partnered ENM people.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 05:36 PM
1

I ask them out often but yeah. ​ I need to know someone before I'm attracted to them. So it's a matter of getting to know a new friend and finding out if they have any compatibility with me (as highly partnered non mono person, very very few people are compatible with me).
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 05:34 PM
9

Because gender essentialism falls apart when both people are the same gender and/or one or more people are non binary. ​ So much of TRP is built on "women are like X" and "Men are like Y". And it's silly and childish and anyone who doesn't easily fit into a hetero cis mono relationship sees how painfully untrue these ideas are, right away.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 05:32 PM
7

I'm polyamorous. TRP ideology and FDS ideology become even more transparently incorrect and harmful to the people who believe them. Because no matter how dumb they are about monogamy, they are even more nonsensical about non monogamy. ​ Yes, often poly men have a harder time finding people to fuck using OLD then women. It is much easier to find abundant low quality cock as a woman poly or mono. But I have three male partners and they all have more then one female partner. It takes me years and y…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/22 05:27 PM
1

Naw, the idea that the majority of even single women are ‘where are all the good men’-ing is a red pill fantasy. TRP NEEDS to believe that men are the gatekeepers to relationships because they feel so disempowered by the ideology that tells them they will never experience mutual attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 07:13 PM
1

Young people are leaving Facebook in droves or never getting an account. Facebook sucks and everyone other then your grandma is leaving for more modern platforms.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 06:56 PM
1

What part of "outside certain subreddits" don't you understand? If I go to r/professors and then say "everyone in the world is a professor" I'm an idiot. If you go to r/whereareallthegoodmen and then say "all women bitch and moan about where the good men are" you are a what?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 06:40 PM
2

I'm saying the idea that there are SO MANY women bitching and moaning about "there are no good men" is a red pill fantasy. Are there some women who think that way? Absolutely. Are they the majority of women? Fuck no. Are they the majority of single women? Not in any way that I can tell. The idea that this angry hurt strawwoman is all, or even most women, is silly. I have literally never met a woman with this idea or attitude.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 05:52 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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