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savedempath Archive

View 8 posts and 91 comments by savedempath on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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268

Great reflection go through the grieving process and remember all that benefit of the doubt you gave him, give it back to yourself. You are learning great job sis! Youu did it, you are free.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/22 07:49 PM
31

Aka Confused aka loser aka reasons why I don't care what guys say anymore. I'm doing what I want either your in or out. Prove me to me we can vibe otherwise go do your thing over somewhat else.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/22 02:29 PM
53

"Because that only works with men who are lower quality than you are." his theory is based on his opinion not reality. Ladies if you want a relationship don't listen to that garbage. He honestly sounds confused because he even said you should wait if you want a serious suitor lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/22 02:15 PM
17

Go get the sommelier if he wanted to make his life easy, or get his shift manager lol. Someone who knows what's up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/22 08:21 PM
71

Okay yes, but also a lesson in knowing as a woman that if you ask someone something, that they can't give you. You will waste time. He wasn't the sommelier so he gave her his idea of what he thought she wanted. We have to not only ask for what we need/want, but make sure we are asking the right person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/22 07:48 PM
71

Honestly good question. Princess treatment could be bad, but I'm going to assume it's good. It's a man being kind, genuine and treating you well. However, it's good to point out men wear a mask and so just because they treat you a certain way for a short period of time doesn't mean they are being "true to themselves". In this video as the wise woman points out. If you are not getting what you want, leave. I think that's my takeaway. Call it what you want, princess treatment, queen treatment or w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/22 07:12 PM
16

Yeah my mom was in a relationship that was emotionally damaging, and her mom died when she was young. However her dad, my grandpa, was a polygamist. So lol lots of trauma around functional relationships. However my mom is inherently positive and highly independent so I admire her tenacity. Very similar the only reason my mom is okay today is because my dad died. I actually made a promise to myself to never date anyone that reminds me of my dad anymore. I find myself weirdly attracted to that kin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/22 04:11 PM
22

Love this video of a young queen understanding men are not the center of the world!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/22 07:46 PM
7

The last guy I dated was like this and I realized It really shouldn't be that hard. Happy I'm working on becoming more content with myself and believing what I need is imperative over any guy. It's a process to learn this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/22 04:35 AM
46

Just got out of a relationship with an ugly scrote who called me unattractive, and broke up with me over text. I'm at my lowest when it comes to dealing with men. I'm taking a huge timeout and leveling the fuck up. Cannot settle and nobody should ever, but it takes time practice and healing! Thankful for FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/22 09:39 PM
13

My mom was a pick me, I grew up seeing someone work so hard for so little. I normalized it. I just recently realized I was doing something similar with all the men I was choosing. Not anymore. I'm done. I'm just want to be a baddie and enjoy my baddie self on my own. Just working on being my best self and unlearning tons of toxic beliefs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/22 03:59 PM
175

Don't reply. If they say what's up? Just remind them you are busy. Strong boundaries especially in a service job where you are paid to be nice and appealing lol. Just keeping it simple and sweet. No I'm busy. No I can't. If they don't get the hint, just let them know you have little free time and mostly spend it with your girls. I would also block/mute their messages so it gets sent to hidden requests or message requests. If you are worried about the social repercussions, sounds like they are ap…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/22 03:51 PM
56

Men like this act super insecure, and is why If I ever enter a relationship I will not only vet, but enter pre-marital counseling. It mind boggles me that men act like this, but as the saying goes. Men ain't shit. I'm thankful for boundaries and ruthless vetting. I understand the work now that goes into it is to avoid men like this, and any sign of weakness is an immediate drop!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 09:34 PM
37

Lukewarm is the beginning of something getting cold. It's bad. Don't waste time. Appreciate the experience and walk away. Never give men benefit of the doubt we do this too much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 02:16 PM
25

It comes down to the priorities. Try dating men of different races and bring up certain topics that would potentially help you understand what decisions they would make, and see how it sits with you. If you date a white guy see what his takes are on your culture. Vetting for the fetishy dudes is always my top priority. Questions like have you dated outside your race? What's your experience been? Maybe not right away, but over the first three dates. Seeing if he has experience with travel and wha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/03/22 11:41 PM
14

You know I never really understood her monologue but I get it now, and I understand why she snapped. Lol that's why I'm healing otherwise I'll end up going literally crazy. I used to try so hard to be cool girl, NOT ANYMORE!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 11:00 PM
125

Consider his silence an act of God. Go to his place when he isn't home grab your items and leave his there. Change your locks and go no contact. Sometimes we get signs in weirdest places. You've been given an exit! Leave, Run and don't look back, you'll turn into salt lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 10:52 PM
58

oh my God. This is the type of guy that will kill you. 100% yo imagine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 11:50 PM
48

Hahaha. Okay she is coming from a Life Coach perspective. The person you date is not your client (ideally). While what she says might be true for her perspective. This advice is not applicable to dating. It's applicable to understanding human psychology sure, but not for finding a good man. Lol if she understood she'd be quiet. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 11:47 PM
22

•He self identifies as a people pleaser. •Is super susceptible to peer pressure always following what his friends are doing. •Is lowkey judgemental, this may look like him saying Oh I love anime and this kind of stuff, but the people who like that kind of stuff are gross and fat, but I'm not so I'm better. He is a nerd, but thinks he is better than his friends because he is fit or goes out. •Constantly compares himself to others in small ways. It might be oh I wish I could do that, instead of th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 09:43 PM
7

❤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/22 02:21 AM
5

Way back when the first guy I fell in love with I met on Tinder. He was great for where I was back then and then I held onto long and it became sour. It was a great experience because he was my best friend, but it ended because he and I were not a good match, and he didn't really love me as much as I loved him. That seems to be apart of my pattern, the one I am breaking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/22 01:53 AM
17

This is my issue and I get stepped on by all kinds of men. I'm over it. 😒 When we act nice and kind all the time, we are not holding ourselves to our highest standard. And honestly I think Men know that and thats why they just want a "nice girl", because she will just do whatever you want. I realize I don't want a man who has that view point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/22 05:36 AM
30

Have self-compassion! all the benefit of the doubt you gave him! Give that and some to yourself. Ask yourself your beat friend came to you with your story, how would you act! Self compassion is what heals not self judgment!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/22 08:08 PM
12

Women wouldn't have sex with men if they didn't think there was value. Whether your a self proclaimed hoe or not. You probably have bought into an idea that being with a man gives you power or makes you desirable. Both stem from an insecurity and so just learning to separate your worth from your sexual self helps women I believe. Everyone internalizes it differently however.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/22 03:10 AM
113

I've always championed the idea of a decentralized platform that has accountability, but this is one of the BIGGEST ISSUES WITH these platforms. There is absolutely no regulation on trade of CP or any sort of illegal type transaction. It's essentially the best way to trade or procure these items, and it's definitely made me more aware of the huge downfalls of these decentralized platforms. All these crypto dudes are essentially incels or former incels selling people this dream, but they can't hi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/22 02:24 PM
10

Staying focused on my weight loss journey. Rollerskating as a new hobby. I used to rollerskate a lot when I was a kid. starting a rollerskate tik tok to just have an outlet. Doing more things with my friends. Lunches, drinks and just having less convos about boys and more about life! Focusing more on my finances. Starting my loc journey and embracing my natural hair, and also embracing wigs and just trying all different things with my looks. Along this same lines is embracing different fashion s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 10:52 PM
15

Both lol. Mean = Mean. I don't care what type of issues you have. If you are an asshole either change or Imma leave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/22 09:48 PM
15

The texting at is my cue to exit the conversation and drop the dude. Sounds like he isn't genuinely interested in getting to know you. He is just being performative, and that is a huge turn off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/22 02:42 PM
14

I wish you well!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 05:34 PM
51

All thoughts lead to actions. Fantasizing is not productive all the time. Maybe focus those thoughts into what can I potentially look for in a good man, rather than setting yourself to be let down. And if you continue fantasizing then you know your thoughts are being occupied by unnecessary ideas. Time to focus on a project or something else.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 05:32 PM
5

Girl sameeeeee. I laughed to myself thinking there is no way this guy is this boring. Turns out he was! 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 05:23 PM
55

First of all decide what you want. Secondly ask what you have gotten out of this. third have compassion for yourself, and stop interacting with him. I would highly recommend finding someone to talk to on an online out of pocket therapy service. These types of situations can really break down your mental health and lead you to make terrible decisions. You sound like your in pain. This also is going to sound weird, but if you have any friends who you know won't sugarcoat this situation. Tell them …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 05:19 PM
46

currently healing from this exact problem. only this is my last time, and I'm diving way deeper into why I have repeated this pattern. I'm uprooting some deep deep roots.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 03:42 PM
77

Wishy washy= he's only staying for the sex. Learned that one the hard way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 10:22 PM
11

I'm going to watch this movie to treat myself. I love whodunit type movies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/22 08:55 PM
63

The questions you asked are great, and I'm definitely going to be Journaling about these today. I'd say my definition of nice girl is someone who is willing to see where things go and matching energy. Things I did wrong: Slept with him way too quick, Was way too available/clingy, and planned dates bkoz he wouldn't take initiative. The trouble is I'm asking God for signs. He sends him and I Ignore them because "well maybe..." that mindset is way less than it used to be for me, but I realize I am …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 05:28 PM
21

I'm finding that when I stay longer than a month and I have any anxiety, that I regret not listening to my intuition. in 3 weeks that could be a min of 3 dates. At that point It should be easy or I'm probably getting some vibes that are off. I want to get to that level of turn around, not quite there yet but actively working on myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 05:18 PM
29

I relate to this and thanks for speaking on the uncomfortable-ness of asserting yourself. It ain't easy, but the more we practice the more effortless it becomes. 3 weeks is an ideal turn-around for me. Happy you exited quicklyyyt
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 04:39 PM
21

It's rude lol. When guys do that it's mean. Its supposed to be a tactic. I find it highly immature and just off-putting I need positive vibes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 01:09 AM
5

This broke my heart. She is gone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/21 04:23 PM
16

Bro there is a picture floating of him, and its very telling lol. People who say things like this tend to be angry and hurt. Lol pay him no mind haha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 01:50 AM
11

I had the closure conversation with a nvm I had dated, and I was so depressed haha. It didn't hurt, but it certainly didn't help. I think he on some level, felt bad otherwise he wouldn't have gone. I'm honestly surprised he did. All I can say is that I realized it didn't matter what he did, it was all me. I still am healing over that one and it was in 2019 ugh. Totally better to move in silence. Totally better to just learn to heal yourself. It takes time, but its possible. I'm still on my heali…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 04:29 PM
5

Why would you say that? He seems to post content that suggests otherwise?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 08:44 PM
2

Thats the manosphere talking lol. Its great on YouTube, doesn't help you get dates lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 04:55 AM
13

I had no strong women role models. So I hope I can help my sister in anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 09:10 PM
10

Yeah. It was just weird. He was kind limping but I wasn't sure if it was because he was overweight or drunk. Either way, he was wayyyy to comfortable and I made it very clear lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 09:08 PM
1

I mean she is talking to an audience of people who want to heal their relationships after crazy stuff, so I get that it can be damaging especially if the relationship was terrible. However, I get the vibe that she is challenging people to level up within the context of a relationship which I guess is slightly different than what FDS promotes. I still think it would be interesting to hear the differences, if anything it would be a cool debate or a wonderful conversation with potentially opposing …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 05:17 PM
5

Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 04:01 AM
2

Oh you don't like her stuff?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 04:00 AM
6

I love this song
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 12:57 AM
14

I equate it to being on drugs. The high might actually be blissful, but ultimately its unnatural. While you might have genuinely enjoyed what you thought were consensual events with your dom, your mental state when back to normal told you otherwise. That should really tell you all you need to know. If your regular state is feeling even lower than usual, than that's not a good sign of anything. You are right to look back at that time as abuse, but also be kind to yourself. Nobody is perfect and w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 12:54 AM
1

If you can esther perel
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 12:46 AM
13

I have no idea what await, mwalt and trp mean?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 12:45 AM
19

Phew. Read this post 5 years too late, but I hope to share this information with the younger girls who are coming up below me, at age appropriate times of course.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 12:19 AM
6

🤣🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/21 04:32 AM
11

Why do you want a child? I think you can obviously live your life on your own, but do you genuinely want to be married? Do you value partnership? It sounds like you don't, but I would maybe suggest really thinking deep and hard, about being a single mom. Its not easy, and you will need a very good support system because you won't have a partner. While being married isn't required to have a child, it really depends on what your goal is. I wish you luck, but willingly choosing single motherhood, c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 04:52 PM
4

Wow congrats sis!!! :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 04:45 PM
12

Bad vibes, nail polish on his finger. I don't like it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 04:39 PM
52

This!! And it's to their detriment. I have been through some serious trauma, and I already know that one of the major things I will be looking for in a man is his ability to handle stress. Grief is a huge part of life, and it's important to be able to move through it in a healthy-ish way without destroying everyone near you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 05:11 AM
21

My mom had my brother at 34 and my sister at 40 and delivered us all vaginally. Whenever I hear a man use that as his argument as to why women should be more mindful about getting pregnant younger. I know that they A. Have no idea what they are talking about B. Need to stop policing women's bodies. C. Have no faith, and are PARTAKING in societal pressure. D. Aka they are full of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 04:38 AM
18

Normalize Pre-marital counseling!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 04:33 AM
21

Yes yes and more yes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 04:31 AM
5

I do think it still needs to be plainly stated. As they say Common sense is not so common. The only men I think take advantage of this are the predators, those that do not really care about women as people. Just see us as a means to an end. Otherwise I do believe speaking plainly to men especially young men ages 11-22. Otherwise incels are bred.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 04:30 AM
3

Yes I totally agree. Good for you sister for realizing your worth. I think its awesome that we as women hold out for the best men. It just seems the onus is on women to be "responsible". Its odd to me, and feels really bad. I get that women need to hold a high standard for themselves, but men either are terrible, or there is a real agenda in society to pull women down via men. It seems more and more so. I'm glad you are doing better, and left a situation that was toxic. I pray for women everyday…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 03:43 PM
10

I want a man with spiritual maturity, emotional control, and a nice smile. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 04:53 AM
5

Omg send me this man lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 04:50 AM
8

Why do you think that is? Its mind boggling to me that men just waste their time in unfavorable relationships. With women they don't really like. Is that a mystery we will never understand?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 04:43 AM
24

Haha I love this. Self reflection for the win.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/21 01:34 AM
6

I love this post, and it took me a long time to understand that men didn't view women the same way we view them. It is so important as women that we stay focused on our needs and standards and accept nothing less.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 11:15 PM
1

Literally I think I actually did get tested after that. I can laugh about it now, but at the time I felt pretty weird about the whole situation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 08:58 PM
2

I went on a date with a NVM that didn't know Africa was a continent. He catfish me with his photos he was 100lbs heavier. I mean he had abs in his photo and when I met him he was wearing suspenders to hold his pants up. He sweated profusely, and by the end of the date looked like he just ran a marathon. He then made me pity him because he parked far away probably on purpose. So I drove him to his parking spot, and he tried to finger me. I texted him the next day this wouldn't work, and he said I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 05:47 PM
1

Nope. Derrick Jackson is the epitome of even a broken clock is right two times a day. He did the best he could, but his downfall was actively rooting against these type of men. He was super pander towards women, and also very harshly critical of men. Seeing this whole thing come out tells me he was not in a place to be giving this advice. And that inability of self reflection is a narcissistic trait, and so I think if he was smart he would heal, come back and then talk, but he just keeps talking…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 01:58 PM
5

Sis learn to love yourself. You dont need a man to do that. It sounds like you really are over rationalizing why you need to be in a relationship. I've done this many times, and it wasn't until I had a health scare that I had to re-evaluate why I was even dating at all. Don't involve anyone in your queendom until you are ready. This is the dating spiral that we as women can get lost down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 05:01 AM
4

FDS is a great re-awakening that let's women take their power back. I'm grateful, and I pray everyday for the women still lost, who have yet to be found.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 04:55 AM
2

Wait do we have FDS Playlist because I have some women empowerment artists i would love to add Some of my favorites artists that have good beats and empowering lyrics, parisalexa, her songs, cleo sol, ari Lennox, the big moon. I could go on... let's start a positive FDS lady empowerment playlist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 04:15 AM
2

Im working on this everyday haha.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 04:12 AM
4

Phew a message.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 02:20 AM
4

Sister, get some real people in your corner. Consider therapy, consider Journaling daily. Figure out your goals, and keep moving. Cry and let out all the negative feelings, grieve the relationship and move forward.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 06:43 PM
6

I feel sorry for them, but also I'm very repulsed. Men are disgusting, and only the good ones float to the top. So I need to focus on cultivating discernment, cultivating self love and work on my life to then attract the right one. Most men are gross its true, and many women are in denial. I pray for everyone, and especially those are at the "bottom of the barrel". We as women need to stop worrying about men and focus on our own livelihood.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 04:57 PM
7

I've seen this especially in the older generations. I think as modern women it is our duty to hold ourselves to a different standard and accept nothing less because it starts of with I'll pay for half of dinner, and ends up with oh you pay half the mortgage even though you make half my salary. These are small things that I'm starting to notice, and I'm glad I found this page. Its so educational and a great reminder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 05:56 AM
274

"We just got engaged, Still single." Thats one I need to hear as someone who wants to get married one day. Just because he says it doesn't mean he will go through with it. Engagement doesn't promise anything. Thats a word. Edit: I'm not engaged just quoting what he said lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 04:46 AM
1

Why did he wait until you were leaving? I'm always weary when the approach is awkward. Its not usually a good sign.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 04:36 AM
8

Phew, it's wild to think that this happens to many people. It makes me sad, but hopeful that healing is possible. I will definitely check out that book.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 04:26 AM
24

So much this, my dad would yell at us that no one would ever believe who he really was, and that if we ever told people he was abusive they'd laugh in our faces. I'm still healing from lots of things and so I have not been in a relationship either, but I can spot that behavior from miles away. I also no longer tolerate this behavior, I used to have a high tolerance for BS, and now it is very low.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 01:44 AM
6

This times a million.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 01:36 AM
4

Looking back he had many sociopathic tendencies, and he was a master manipulator. The craziest part about it was he was honest from the get-go about pretty much who he was. I just thought because he liked me that he must be willing to change. That was not the case. I ended it after I realized he was going to keep me in a loop. I was delusional.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 05:17 PM
15

I asked my ex NVM when the first time he has sex was at brunch, because he claimed to be a very sex positive person, and we were talking about different experiences we had that made us realize what we like and don't like. I asked him what his first time having sex was like, and if he enjoyed it or wished he had handled it differently. He stopped eating, turned his eyes away from mine, and said " I don't remember". I started laughing thinking he was joking, only to realize he was being dead serio…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 06:36 AM
10

Oh yes I agree. If your needs are not being met, doesn't mean he is right for you. Stay true to your needs!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 05:55 AM
1

I was so guilty of falling for this. I've learned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 04:19 AM
1

There is a book called the state of affairs by esther perel. About this phenom, and its called the love-lust split and it usually happens to men as they age, and haven't healed any of their mom wounds. It typically happens after they get married, or stay committed to someone. It can happen to women, but usually women cheat more emotionally. Not sexually. Its a really great book that talks about how to work through the issue.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 04:10 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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