TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

serkovavantgarden Archive

View 2 posts and 428 comments by serkovavantgarden on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
89

serkovavantgarden/r/Divorce_Men15/10/25 07:34 AM
51

serkovavantgarden/r/Divorce_Men27/12/25 07:46 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
26

The old ‘emotional’ affair I love when they test the waters with that one. Mate, they have been having sex. You’ll find this all out in due course
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/26 05:26 AM
21

I love you but I’m not in love with you Translation I’ve found new dick and you’re in the way
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/26 03:46 PM
11

Makes sense You breaking your back trying to keep your life on an even keel was completely out of order. No wonder your wife decided to slut it up. She’s gaslighting you hard man. It’s never their fault. Surely 21 years of marriage taught you that? Lawyer up man, ditch this piece of trash from your life and get everything you deserve mate
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 05:10 PM
3

Jesus H Christ Have a word with yourself mate Sounds like 2 school kids having a lovers tiff here.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/26 06:37 PM
3

“Am I delusional” Yes mate, you’re absolutely delusional. Get a lawyer, split 50/50 and move on with your life.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/26 06:08 AM
5

Why are 10 years ‘gone’? You spent 10 years navigating a relationship. You’ll. take that experience into the next one. Loving relationships in general are really tough and require a lot of work. That’s why most fail
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/26 09:39 PM
0

Why? Bro is choking to get his dick wet ffs. Let a man live OP I would roll with tinder tbh.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/26 03:45 PM
3

Listen to this guy
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 12:49 PM
19

She’s ready to date a few weeks after initiaiting divorce? Yeah sure that sounds quite about right She’s at it mate. Someone has been in the background for quite the while and she’s gaslighted you into thinking it’s YOUR fault that things are over Let’s see how this one plays out BTW she’s doing you a favour in the long run. Cut the cord my man. Shes gone and it’s time to view her with the contempt she deserves
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/26 03:20 PM
1

Well said mate OP will be looking back on this in a years time thinking ‘wtf was going through my head’
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/26 11:25 AM
4

Yeah I’ve been keeping up with your story as well man. I like the guys who document the experience, there have been a few. We all have our own way of dispensing advice. Some can be harsh (defo me) and some are defo more empathetic. However we all mean well because we know that the other side is bright as hell and we want all our fellow divorce bros to get there, because we know how messed up this experience really is
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/26 04:17 PM
4

Bouncing on new dick is working on yourself jeez Louise! Didn’t you get the memo pal
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/26 05:28 PM
5

I moved past it by keeping busy and meeting new women. That’s all it really comes down to however right now you likely want a magic pill to make it all go away. Just keep busy mate. Let the lawyers take over the heavy graft while you focus on filling your time with things that benefit you. When you start to yearn for the past, just remember you’re now dealing with someone who has deeply betrayed you. That wasn’t an ‘emotional affair’. Women don’t leave husbands for a guy they haven’t boned yet.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/26 03:33 PM
19

Mate you should bite her hand off for what’s she’s offering She’s deep in the affair fog And she will regret this in a years time when lover boy has had his fill of her vag and bringing up another man’s kids
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/26 12:48 PM
2

Is this for real?
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/26 12:45 PM
1

Sounds like a totally plausible story bro Especially the choking part Jesus wept
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/26 11:03 AM
4

Well said mate. Time and distance are great healers. Throw in getting your dick wet and you have the holy trifecta of divorce recovery Exciting times ahead for you
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/26 04:37 PM
29

Women, on a whole, tend to think men are dumb and simple creatures. They’re right to a certain degree. Our needs are minimal and if met, lead to inner peace. Which is why they pull crazy shit like trying to put their husbands in friend zone while they bang co worker Chad. And assume husband will be fine with this arrangement. Your wife has deeply, deeply betrayed you. Use logic to bring her down. She’s in the affair fog and is ripe like a peach right now. Be calculating. She’s your foe now. And …
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/26 05:36 AM
40

Sounds like the guy she was leaving you for has had buyers remorse and took his damaged goods back to the shop You’re the shop bro Lawyer up
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/26 05:06 AM
2

Here you have it fellas
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/26 08:44 AM
7

Mate stop getting emotional about this KEEP THE HOUSE She wants the divorce. Let her have it and let her deal with the consequences. Honestly, you will be on here in 3 months time raging about how some guy has moved into your grannies house while you’re stuck in some crummy motel
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/26 07:39 AM
2

I wouldn’t say it’s normal I mean, I know it happens however most folk would expect you to move on in some capacity. To ruminate over your ex is literally you having a fight with your own imagination. It’s actually insane when you see it for what it is
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/26 05:42 AM
1

Mate you’ve been assaulted Report this to the police
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/26 10:08 AM
3

Exactly man Whip the phone camera out and start filming her ass. She’ll likely try and cat claw the phone out your hands Instant assault charge on top of the restraining order Jobs a good one
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/26 03:54 PM
13

Take it up a notch and bang a tinder date on her side of the bed
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 07:29 AM
0

Totally agree with 3 Ive worked in a job for 20 + years where I actively have to give advice to men and women Here’s what I’ve learned Men generally, never take advice. Their ego gets in the way and they always know better Women are very responsive to feedback and for the most part, actively take advice on board and implement it
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 05:20 AM
1

I hear you bro My job is actually a break. Some downtime you could say… When I collect the kids from school, that’s when the real work kicks in
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 08:32 AM
1

Yeah mate giver her a second chance she sounds like a keeper
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/26 05:39 PM
4

This family cruise is going to be super awkward
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/26 10:51 AM
19

She’s loves you but she’s not in love with you Oh that’s novel We all know what this one means don’t we fellas
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/26 10:14 AM
8

I know a couple of guys personally who don’t get to see their kids and have given up They feel they have done all they can and are keeping e mails and comms with lawyers to show their kids when they inevitably come calling .
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/26 03:16 PM
4

You don’t look at the mantelpiece when you’re poking the fire mate
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/26 02:24 PM
4

I never said all bro
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/26 02:23 PM
0

I think for most divorced men, any hole is a goal. Beggars can’t be choosers
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/26 11:34 AM
17

Yeah man, someone has given her the green light. You’re nothing but an obstacle to her right now. Her hatred for you will be on another level. Keep this in mind when you start to have idiotic thoughts like ‘maybe I should give her the house’ or ‘I want her back’
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/26 11:53 AM
6

A man tends to become ‘hungry’ when his back is up against a wall Divorce has you wearing that ‘wall’ like it’s a kids school backpack. Congrats on taking ownership of your life mate
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/26 07:14 AM
1

[ Removed by Reddit ]
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/26 05:23 AM
2

I feel the same way when I have a cup of coffee in the morning Then reality kicks in and I realised that regardless how happy you seem to be, life will throw some shit at you. Human beings want certainty A divorce is the complete opposite of uncertainty Embrace uncertainty Voltaire had a quote about it ffs
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/26 10:05 AM
2

I hear you mate Just trying to save the poor guy some cash lol. He needs every penny he can get !
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/26 01:53 PM
3

Therapy doesn’t work for everyone mate I tried it. Waste of time Chat GPT gave me better ‘therapy’ than an actual human and it cost £20 a month lol
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/26 07:54 AM
2

Ok so your folks never spent a dime on you after high school Sounds like that one turned out ok in the long run if you’re earning enough to pay the ex $7k a month mate Wee lesson to be learned there mate
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/26 07:43 AM
7

Jesus Christ mate time to start putting yourself first Time to start playing hardball with this monster of an ex as well Maybe it’s the UK mindset however your kids sound they’re in the 18 year and above category. Time for them to start fending for themselves as well. Funding your daughter’s college lifestyle is crazy. They always say the daughters turn out like their mothers and your defo facilitating that with the sugar daddy mindset
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/26 06:37 AM
3

I love it. Men need some lonesome time.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/26 08:34 AM
1

Shoutin’ and bawlin’
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/26 03:50 PM
6

Who needs enemies with friends like that They’re having sex and having a laugh at you behind your back mate Keep that in mind when you’re figuring out how to approach this Lay off the booze as well This approach needs a cool, clear head. Save the drinking for when this shit is over
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/26 06:36 AM
3

Go with your first reaction The gut reaction The one that is rarely ever wrong
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/26 04:47 AM
6

Mate she was basically cheating on you Can you really trust her? I mean, she has completely betrayed you Lawyer up
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 01:46 PM
2

I love how they ‘immediately’ meet a new guy once they separate Sure ladies. Mate just go full custody if you’re that scared of deadbeats being around your kids 50/50 means that you’re going to have to suck it up as well 50% of the time
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 09:06 AM
1

I remember when my ex used to go through my phone and accuse me of cheating Turned out she was the cheater Funny how that one worked out
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 05:43 AM
4

You’re calibrating to your new reality However you’re trying to calibrate to something that is akin to a nuclear bomb It’s tough. Traumatic to a certain degree However don’t let someone else dictate your quality of life Don’t give them that power Embrace how you feel. Savour it and let it pass through you. Then take charge and stand your ground .
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/26 09:14 AM
2

Fair enough mate I hope it all works out well for you Stick to your guns and please only yourself
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/26 02:58 PM
7

You’re being trickle truthed bro Look it up It gets darker from here mate. Be prepared
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/26 02:51 PM
7

An ‘emotional affair’ The old classic Sorry to let you down buddy but affairs become emotional once the fucking begins. Time to dig deeper bro
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/26 02:36 PM
6

Wow man She’s doing you a favour in the long run mate What an absolute piece of shit she really is
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/26 07:55 AM
4

Your wife clearly doesn’t have a clue Get a good lawyer and take advantage of this Make sure she’s paying for hers as well
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 05:12 AM
11

Yeah man once the other sucker who decided to take them on, appears on the scene…. They go colder than a witches tit
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 05:10 AM
2

You’re calibrating mate Humans adapt Its what we do best You’re looking for a deeper meaning but it’s really not that deep You’re a good dad.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/26 08:59 PM
3

What identity shift? You’re still the kids dad Enjoy your me time mate. Men need it.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/26 08:44 PM
13

Crazy to think that a man has to support a woman who never bore him any offspring, after a divorce
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/26 11:16 AM
2

I get what you’re saying. You only get one side of the story in here and everyone’s the hero in that yarn. I put my hands up to playing my part in my divorce. I was selfish at times and I started lying to my ex in order to try and keep her happy. I actually had to join a gym in secret at one point because my ex used to give me shit for training and looking semi decent. In order to mitigate the stress that created, I would tell her any old shit to fob her off Looking back it was a bad strategy on…
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 05:56 PM
2

Yeah but sometimes that person in the rain has an umbrella Find your way of staying dry bro
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/26 08:12 AM
3

Stick this comment to the top In a nutshell Lawyer up OP and take her down
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/26 05:00 AM
1

You’ll get used to it mate In fact, you’ll start to look forward to some alone time and dont feel guilty about it
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 11:43 AM
3

Sorry mate but you’d probably get more advice if you put paragraphs in here. Hardly anyone will read this wall of text
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/26 01:40 PM
10

She wants you to ‘still live together for the kids’ No she doesn’t. She has her cake and wants to eat it too. On your dime You shouldn’t be worried mate. You should be angry. Get to a lawyer and file mate. Your wife has lost the plot and needs a reality check
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/26 01:38 PM
27

She ‘grieved’ the marriage while you were still thinking things were going well Probably a year before you guys separated That’s how it works mate You’re not crazy. You, like the rest of us, had a wife who was communicating her issues to you telepathically. They’re the crazy ones
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/26 09:44 AM
1

It will pass mate. Never let a woman dictate your quality of life
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/26 07:02 PM
6

‘Immediately started dating’ Sure she did mate, sure she did
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/26 06:47 PM
3

You’ll calibrate mate. Most of us do. We’re wired to adapt. Just a shame that it’s a major pain in the ass getting there. Should be a cut and dry process at your age as well, financially I’d imagine
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/26 09:08 PM
9

Listen mate, I found butt plugs in my ex’s drawer when we were still cohabiting And I can ensure you that I had never used them with her That one was a blow lol But I got over it Just like you will with this wee setback
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/26 09:02 PM
1

Why would you introduce your new GF to your ex? Some weird, creepy vetting process if you ask me Introduce the kids to your new woman mate. You’ll be doing both yourself and your ex a favour in the long run
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/26 05:35 AM
4

Always trust your gut mate
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 06:38 PM
5

Mate, your anger is directed towards the wrong person. Dial a dick will be one of many so I would bite my lip here Channel your anger into productive activities that benefit YOU
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 06:07 AM
1

A background story would help a lot here
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 05:48 AM
3

So she’s out the house and not coming back? Is she on legal aid mate? If she is then she can drag this out for a good while. I’d hold tight and let the solicitors do the heavy lifting. Dont send more than 2 letters. You’ll just be burning cash at that point Maybe you’llget better info on some male divorce groups on Facebook mate. This place is very yank-centric
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/26 12:51 PM
2

Jesus mate, you’re stressing about this ????
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/26 09:03 AM
2

Mate do you have kids together? If not, it’s a cut and dry process. That’s why, in the UK, such a process is known as a ‘simple divorce’ 50/50 split of all marital assets. Let her make allegations. I’d be more worried if she can produce cold, hard evidence
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/26 06:41 AM
6

‘She told me this life just isn’t what she wants. And she’ll never be the wife or mother we deserve’ My ex said something remarkably similar when she initiated separation It turned out to be code for ‘I’m banging a coworker. You’ve served your purpose’ Get digging bro In the meantime though, embrace how you’re feeling. It’s going to be ROUGH but you will eventually calibrate and start to go into action mode Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 06:15 AM
2

This ‘child focused approach’ is buying into her bullshit. You’re facilitating it with this woo woo thinking. The kids should be staying overnights from day dot. Kids would sleep at the top of a tree if you let them. Tell her to get stuffed and go 50/50 baseline mate
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 08:30 PM
2

I’ve enjoyed reading your story mate. Top work fella!
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 07:53 PM
5

Listen to your gut mate It never lets you down
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/26 05:00 PM
4

I did well financially. My ex was deep in the affair fog and I knew it. She just wanted to shack up asap with her new man. That meant she was more than happy to play ball. If the shoe had been on the other foot however…. Jesus, I break into a cold sweat thinking about it
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/26 07:55 PM
7

I got divorced at 45 mate The amount of shit you get hit with during this phase is eye watering. A series of events which on their own, would be stressful enough, all happening at the same time. It’s a nightmare 50/50 everything. That’s your baseline. I’m in a much better place 2 years down the line. Beautiful girlfriend who adores me, see my kids half the week, get the other half to indulge in me time, more cash in your pocket, freedom to do whatever you please…. Come on man, divorce is an amaz…
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/26 06:22 PM
1

You just tell her mate There is no sugar coating this shit
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/26 03:12 PM
13

Women love to shame. Their methods of violence tends to be shaming, gossiping, slandering and ostracising That’s what you’re up against. I literally had a situation last night where I had to mediate a situation between my ex and my mother. Even my own mother was trying to shame me into ‘putting my ex in her place’ My own mother lol Once you realise that you will never win against a woman (in their heads mind you) then you can achieve some form of peace
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/26 03:06 PM
2

This is how it’s done
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/26 11:05 AM
7

I was dating within 6 months Put yourself out there and lean into discomfort That’s how you ‘work on yourself’ Moping about, reading self help and seeking advice is just stalling the process
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/26 11:04 AM
6

Kids involved? If not it should be a fairly cut and dry process. Try not to panic. Your head is spinning right now because this bitch has nuked your life, temporarily. Get the lawyer filled in and let them get to work.
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/26 08:26 PM
1

Bro should just follow his gut instinct. As a wise man once said ‘back off warchild’
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/26 04:11 PM
1

Through work.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/26 01:57 PM
10

My partner blows my ex wife out the stratosphere. Hotter, younger, kinder, funnier, a better body. Just an all round superior human being in all honesty.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/26 10:35 AM
6

Why would you? Not one your brightest ideas mate
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/26 10:29 AM
10

It hurts like fuck at the start mate That’s the norm Then the anger kicks in That’s when shit starts to turn in your favour Harness that anger and get what’s yours mate.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/26 10:19 PM
2

Believe me mate, the better they look the harder it is to resist. Stop imposing limitations on yourself. A failed marriage does not define you. If anything, it shows you are stable and prepared to go all in. These are attractive qualities. Divorce changes a man however those changes are powered by your actions which are your choice . Own this shit mate. It’s done.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/26 09:03 AM
4

‘I am NOT looking for a long-term or stable relationship at all now, and I have promised myself I won't even try for a long time after the divorce is finalised’ We all say that until a really attractive woman starts to show interest in us….. You’re hurting mate. We get it. Don’t let your ex define your happiness from this point on. I’m fairly sure she’s thinking that she’s going to be living her best life soon. You should take a leaf out her book. Because she’s right. It gets so much better. Fre…
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/26 06:57 AM
3

He who cares least, wins
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 05:37 PM
1

A new woman is the cure! Men have been saying this for centuries. Don’t know why it’s almost frowned upon in here lol
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 07:12 AM
2

Deleting a text? You sure it was a lawyer she was speaking to ? Be vigilant bro
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 07:11 AM
2

Gaming and weed helps me lol Do what you want bro. It’s your life. Carve your own path
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 07:07 AM
6

Working on yourself is a life long endeavour Stay dating now and enjoy yourself
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 07:03 AM
12

Mate I, along with many others on here, were in exactly the same boat. I caught mine in the act. Within a week she was flaunting it in my face, leaving the house every night to get banged. Within 2, she was trying to arrange that her new man met my kids. An absolute nightmare Once you realise, and you will, how shitty this behaviour is then the anger will build. That’s when you’ll start to take action. Wipe your tears away mate, get to a lawyer and tell them you want 50/50 everything. Carry a vo…
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/26 05:46 AM
1

Nature of the beast nowadays mate It’s a shame we have to second guess most things online nowadays
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 01:48 PM
2

I get AI chat gpt vibes from this however lots of good info in there I don’t agree with number 8. Divorce and the outcome can dictate your life going forward so it makes sense to let the professionals deal with the heavy lifting while you focus on yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 01:32 PM
9

Your brothers wife sounds like a nightmare No wonder he wants out. Let him free. He will cope.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 05:56 AM
9

Mate it’s completely normal to feel this way having discovered the truth Your life has been nuked You’ll start connect the dots soon enough and that broken shell feeling will turn into anger. Anger is when you’ll start to detach yourself from her. Keep yourself busy mate
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 03:53 PM
4

Cat in the cradle mate It’s just what men do. We carve our own path. We become our own men. Your boys love you and always will
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 02:03 PM
3

This guys knows
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 08:12 AM
0

Take what in the ass? Constantly denigrating your ex’s new partner is eventually going to blow up in your face.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 01:19 PM
2

They’re not daft mate lol Always remember though that once they hit 14 they’re going to hate our guts regardless of what we do
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 01:17 PM
2

Never interrupt your enemy when they’re making a mistake
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 01:14 PM
-6

This is the tit for tat behaviour you would expect from a woman in all honesty.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 12:48 PM
3

Any woman with half a brain would bypass this ruling And it’s purely a control mechanism put in by dad to protect his feelings. Your kids are not going to be ‘stressed’ when they meet moms new Chad. Ultimately you need to hope that the ex has a finely calibrated moral compass… Which is rarer than a hens teeth
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 12:44 PM
0

Which is a waste of time Your ex introduces the kids to new man. How do you legally enforce that? All she has to say is it’s her friend. Lawyers lap this shit up lol
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 12:33 PM
7

Absolute waste of time. You can’t legally enforce who your ex chooses to introduce the kids to on her time. All you’re doing here is adding on more lawyers fees and toxicity in the co parenting process
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 12:31 PM
9

My ex was trying to persuade me to let her meet her AP within weeks of me catching them together. That’s how their minds operate bro. Once they go cold, you are dead to them. An obstacle. I held firm for a while however trying to ‘control’ these scenarios is only prolonging the pain Let it go mate. It’s going to happen one day so may as well get it over with asap so you can start the healing process And believe me mate, you will heal
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 12:29 PM
1

Stay strong, keep yourself right and let the lawyers do the heavy lifting Focus ONLY on what you can CONTROL You’ll be a better man when all of this is over, I promise
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 11:26 AM
3

Mate she’s stupidly given you a heads up, thanks to the liquor taking control lol. You can thank Jack Daniels for that one Lawyer up bro.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/26 08:28 AM
5

If I offer to take a woman on a date/dinner etc then I’m paying If the activity has been mutually agreed then we’re chipping in
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/26 05:51 AM
4

It will feel like a nuclear bomb has wen off in your head mate however this is the start of the healing process Once your brain calibrates, you will be angry. Angry that your stbxw is using you as a babysitter so she can get pummelled by some idiot. Use tha anger as fuel to create the strategy that ensures you get out of this hellscape with 50/50 everything. she’s getting mad vag tingles for this guy so her head is in the clouds mate. This provides you with a good degree of leverage at this poin…
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/26 06:52 AM
10

‘I think her limerance or whatever mental block she was in has started to recede.’ Don’t fall into this trap mate. She’s DEEP in the affair fog. She’s only panicking because she’s been caught and exposed to her parents. A woman’s reputation is everything to her and it’s been tarnished. She does not care about you in the slightest. Regardless you’re going about this the right way. I doff my cap to you because I know exactly how you feel and why you have chosen this path. I did the same and came o…
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/26 11:56 AM
2

Well she’s already cheated 3 times on your watch so I would start by getting really fucking angry at her Use this anger to channel your efforts into getting what you deserve out this divorce That anger will eventually burn out and become indifference Indifference is end game
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/26 06:28 PM
0

You’ll get over it when you find out some other guy is now banging her. Apathy will be further solidified when you start getting your dick wet
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/26 12:08 PM
6

Very similar to me Mate I was 46 with a 4 and 6 year old 2 years later and life couldn’t be any better. Own pad and daddy’s rules. You will love it. I’m genuinely excited for you
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/26 07:27 AM
3

Your first mistake was waiting for an apology A woman apologising lol I’ll crack the jokes
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/26 06:27 AM
1

This is textbook behaviour mate. Mines did the same. Suck it up bro because she’s trying to test you. Get voice recordered up. Keep that thing on 24/7 because she will ramp this behaviour up.
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/26 04:05 PM
6

Mate, that was a massive red flag. One you can see from space Anyone with had a brain will know that you will have to interact with the ex. If she’s flipping out over that man….. Wait till the shit really hits the fan
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/26 09:23 PM
2

You’ll get there mate
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/26 07:45 AM
9

‘Already pursuing something with someone else’ Wow that was quick. What are the chances of that!!! Yeah mate, stay friends with her. That’s a great idea.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 09:13 PM
8

The only reason to keep snooping on FB is if you’re going pain shopping Your call mate However if you want to aid the healing process, block and move on
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 05:59 PM
14

She’s having her cake and she wants to eat it Give them an inch and they take a mile Good thing is that she’s lit a fire up your ass and now it’s for you to man up and take charge Get to the lawyer pronto mate and let them do the heavy lifting
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 04:49 PM
1

I’ve got a feeling about her ‘perspective’ And I’m pretty sure there’s a guy you don’t know about right now who’s sharing that ‘perspective’ Get digging mate. When the wife instigates divorce it tends to be because some other guy is sniffing about and has given his word to take her on
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 06:38 AM
2

Depends where you stay I got 50/50 everything. No child support. My life back I’m in the UK however. Yank bros get shafted in the divorce arena
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 06:35 AM
3

TRT, HGH and Retatruride will give you your mojo back for sure lol You’ll also be fighting off the ladies with a shitty stick Seriously though, just start getting busy. Do something. Anything Hit the gym, join a MMA class, go hunting for books, hit the dating apps, get out into nature, wild camping…. A rolling stone gathers moss
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 06:12 AM
8

You’ve yet to move on, you’re still hurting That day will come And when it does, you’ll appreciate ‘me time’
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 06:09 AM
2

I let my ex take everything because even looking at a stupid lamp made me think of her evil ass Start fresh bro. Don’t let your possessions rule you .
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/26 07:43 AM
11

Your mate is clearly under the thumb Keep this in mind when his divorce kicks in and he’s scurrying around, looking for support from his ‘mate’
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/26 05:56 AM
9

She has a job so that’s a good start. She’ll be paying for lawyer fees as well. That shit gets old fast. 50/50 assets and move on with your life mate She’s already wasted enough of it
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/26 11:53 AM
–

The crazy thing is that if SHE was working shifts, she would EXPECT you to live your life round her career Don’t let her dictate. This is why we lawyer up. However you have to take into account, can you actually commit to a 50/50 plan with that work schedule? I work shifts however my ex does too. That means we have to work amicably together to ensure the kids always have one of us around. The environment dictates the strategy. Her being a lazy ass SAHM doesn’t help the situation at all
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/26 07:31 AM
10

Mate, do whatever you want to do Don’t go by the meta on here. Some guys need therapy, some see it as a waste of time Some guys hit the gym, others tend to look for other activities to help re wire their brain I personally hit the apps and indulged in a lot of casual sex. Some guys would shake their heads however knowing that other females found me attractive again provided a platform to get my shit together and stop moping about. That was my therapy You need to find your therapy. And you will b…
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/26 07:23 AM
3

Cool heads prevail mate Get your legalities out the way first If you choose to nuke then by all means, you do you
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/26 02:55 PM
2

Mate, he wants to nuke this guys marriage Not go on a tinder date with the guys wife lol
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/26 02:54 PM
5

We’ve all made mistakes mate Well done for going through with it this time. It’s one of the best moves you’ll likely make You’re getting your life and dignity back
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/26 02:51 PM
3

This in a nutshell
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/26 08:20 PM
1

[ Removed by Reddit ]
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/26 08:19 PM
1

I would just go with UK Divorce in the search bar Plenty will pop up
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/26 07:43 PM
1

You would probably be better looking for a divorce group on Facebook for more Brit-centric advice mate. That’s what I did and I got a lot of great advice.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/26 07:26 PM
2

Well said mate
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/26 02:46 PM
7

I think it’s clearly obvious what you need to ‘do’ mate Something you should have done when she cheated the first time ffs
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/26 07:53 AM
10

Yeah mate she’s done you a favour in the long run Once your brain calibrates after the shock of finding out, they become someone you do not want to be around whatsoever. That’s good. No one wants to end up being the chump who takes her back after she’s let some random pump and dump her. Yuck.
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/26 05:49 PM
-1

Contrary to the beliefs held on here, a sizeable chunk of guys simply don’t want 50/50. A lot, and I mean a lot of guys are more than happy with every other weekend.
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/26 03:35 PM
9

To be fair, I’d imagine most women who venture into this sub have to spend a few moments picking their jaw up off the floor.
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/26 03:33 PM
1

Easy to say this when you’re banging a hot chick 10 years younger than yourself every night lol Seriously though, great post.
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/26 08:09 AM
7

Why is it trolling? The ‘emotional affair’ is part of trickle truth process mate ’emotional’ is code for we’ve banged however that’s something you don’t need to know at this point
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/26 08:19 PM
3

Good man. Same thing happened to me bro You’ll survive then prosper. Trust me
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/26 04:33 PM
11

Affairs become emotional once the banging starts
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/26 04:31 PM
17

No way Jose Imagine the post nut clarity after you’ve banged a hooker Would be up there with post divorce trauma. Just crack one off bro. It’s cheaper and you won’t feel as pathetic afterwards
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/26 08:02 AM
6

Never really understood guys who can take their wife back after she’s had an affair. Each to their own I suppose
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/26 08:25 PM
7

They always do bro
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/26 11:02 AM
9

He won’t care if she’s a cheater He’s blinded by the pussy Get the divorce over and done with asap. She’s his problem now
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/26 10:13 AM
3

Get the voice recorder installed on your phone, keep it on 24/7 and go gray rock bro Your wife thinks you’re dumb which is why she’s trying to strong arm you out the house Get to a lawyer asap. They will deal with the hard graft while you try and navigate the battlefield
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/26 08:06 AM
1

I’m UK based mate Had to do co habitation for around 4 months. What an absolute nightmare My ex blatantly flaunting her new relationship in front of my very eyes. A man’s worst nightmare I would get a voice recorder and keep it turned on mate. More to stop you reacting wildly at stuff that might kick off. It’s a slog mate however when you’re settled in your new place, living your new life, you will feel amazing. And you’ll look back on this thinking to yourself, how proud you are for getting thr…
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/26 06:56 AM
1

Every divorce is unique mate As long as you come out with what you deserve then who cares how you got there
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/26 06:43 AM
12

Mate, marriages are 50/50 That includes the problems Don’t gaslight yourself. You both had a part to play. Good times and bad times
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 11:00 PM
6

How does it sound? It sounds like a crock of shit in all honesty Your ex thinks you’re buttoned up the back She’s raging because she’s having to pay lawyer fees. Make her pay bro Make her pay
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 07:06 AM
11

My ex telling me that it’s a shame that I caught her and AP together, the way I did… Because he’s actually a ‘nice guy’ That one creeped me out a bit, I am not going to lie
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 07:04 AM
3

Mate, just go with the flow, stop overthinking it and while you’re at it, grab some cialis
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 07:01 AM
3

I love it mate!
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/26 07:44 PM
7

Absolutely The amount of shit that you’re hit with during a divorce is insane lol It’s actually pretty exciting looking back in some ways
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/26 05:50 PM
6

Inject this shit right into my veins man Well played sir
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/26 06:46 AM
16

My girlfriend blows my ex out the water. Looks wise and personality wise To the point where I feel like buying the scumbag who was banging my ex while she was married to me, a beer.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/26 01:43 PM
6

Was the same for me bro. Put a ton of money into the house while she made minimal deposits, mainly to placate her ego and something to weaponise when money issues are discussed. They want equality when it suits them But they don’t want the ‘bad parts’ That’s the ‘man’s job’
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/26 08:16 AM
5

Mate, if you came back from all of that then the divorce process will be a squeeze Let time do its work mate. You will calibrate and one day, this will all be behind you.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 07:33 AM
2

The nicest people are capable of dumb acts now and again mate Like us two for example… Arguing over pointless shit on the Internet
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 06:55 AM
2

You cannot control your ex’s relationship with your daughter Likewise, she can’t control yours If you can’t control it, don’t even think about it. You’re doing well bro and you’re seeing things for what they are. You already answered your own question btw
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 06:52 AM
-1

Who’s shitting on his sister? It was a stupid move which has left OP feeling like shit.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 09:01 PM
1

I get it mate Ignorance is bliss in these occasions. Just keep yourself busy bro. Time is a healer for sure
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 07:26 PM
2

Good to see your sister keeping you up to date with the ex’s social media lifestyle I’m sure that will help the grieving process Women want drama mate, even sisters Regardless, those rare ‘good days’ will become regular Stop ruminating mate. Let it go.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 07:01 PM
1

Absolutely agree Another one to factor in is NEVER confide or even give details to your mother/sister or any female relative They will get highly emotional about the situation and could potentially get into trouble. I made that mistake. If I had listened to the advice given to me by my mum and sister…. Jesus It would have made shit a ton more difficult
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 04:54 PM
2

I’ve got 50/50 as set in the divorce decree We’re amicable. You need to be in this situation regardless of what went on before No set plan. We both want the best for our kids
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 08:38 AM
3

Take her cheating into consideration She committed an act that had the potential to royally feck up your life That’s how much respect she had for you when you were married I’d imagine it’s not even a tenth of that right now She’s selfish and out for herself. That’s why she reached out to get help with a stupid fucking slide show Block her number, details, whatever and get back to your life mate She’s nothing more than a memory which sends a shiver through your body
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/26 07:59 AM
5

I can see the sense in a stay at home mum however a stay at home wife???? She should have been out earning her keep a long time ago This will be amicable until her liquid lunch buddies get in her ear
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 09:29 PM
3

I know mate Some horror stories over in the UK but the Americans bros get shafted
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 09:27 PM
3

Exactly mate Who cares what road you take Just start walking. You’ll get there eventually
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 06:56 PM
2

Yeah you guys can live like mom and dad super team living in the same house and raising the kids! Throw in a dead bedroom in there and you guys are set!! Honestly though, why do they do this?? Your gut is telling you this is a total non starter mate. It’s not even normal. And it’s going to get worse with another kid on the way. However if she’s getting into a ruffle because of a social media post? Maybe you’re better off without man. I don’t know mate. It’s a tough one
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 05:17 PM
9

You’re saying this right now bro But wait until a sweet piece of ass enters your world That lizard brain will kick in… Bro, divorce is the start of your new life New experiences, new journeys and new women You’re a young stag as well. The world is at your feet.
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 03:59 PM
2

Separated for 2 years Divorce decree came through the post at the end of December Feel amazing to be honest In a new relationship with an incredibly beautiful woman, 13 years my junior, who my kids absolutely adore 50/50 custody New apartment Life is good
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 01:29 PM
1

Take a bottle of champers and pop that cork as soon as you leave the courthouse You’re a free man!
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 01:27 PM
8

Mate, OP is literally justifying his ex wives slutty behaviour and bad parenting by claiming her actions are down to her ‘finding some much-needed escape time’ Maybe if he knew the truth, he would take action and stop letting the ex live it up while he’s doing the hard yards.
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 10:02 AM
9

Bro, no offence but her ‘new lover’ ain’t as ‘new’ as you think. Make yourself less available. Lie if you need to. Set the standard. You’ll always see your kids but you need your own time to make things happen. You need to harden up for this game. It’s a long one
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 09:04 AM
7

Bluntness saves lives mate We are men. We respond to direct advice. Go slay my bro. We’re rooting for you
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 09:01 AM
9

Dude, just go out and get your dick wet This method has helped men from day dot. There are actual sayings about this process because it works. Stop overthinking this Disney airy fairy bs Your ex is getting slammed 7 ways to Sunday and you’re living in your head Get Hinge fired up mate. You need to let loose
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 07:05 AM
10

Mate, this is what it’s all about That sweet freedom Doing what the hell you want with no one to answer to Savour it fellas because this is what divorce actually tastes like
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/26 06:32 PM
10

Moral of the story guys….. If she cheats, IT’S OVER Do not take her back EVER Seriously though mate, you need to let it go and start making your life all about you… Stop trying to make sense of it all. You made some bad choices Use that experience to make good ones from this moment on
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/26 02:33 PM
7

Co habitation is a bitch man Remember the days when you split up from a woman, you likely never seen them again. That was fun Now it’s sitting in the next room while you can hear your stbx is on the phone to her new man. Absolute torture. However, that shock soon turns to anger which starts to fuel the separation process…. She’s gone mate. Everytime you beg, it confirms to her why she’s divorcing you. You’re pathetic in here eyes We all were Get angry bro. That’s when you’ll start to take contro…
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/26 02:52 PM
3

I love it I get my kids for a week and by the end of it I’m looking forward to some of ‘the quiet’
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/26 12:16 PM
3

Some other guy will be keeping her stocked up in valentine gifts this year no doubt
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/26 09:11 PM
3

A horrific idea One that, in the future, will haunt your dreams
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/26 09:10 PM
9

Mate, you’re getting attention from another woman. You’re in a fog. She’s 12 hours away and you haven’t even met her. The odds are stacked against you man. Has she sent you full body pics for example?
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/26 02:31 PM
4

Dig in mate Dig the fuck in
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/26 06:29 AM
3

I caught my ex in the marital home with AP Let’s just say I got that dreaded day over and done with, pretty sharpish
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 09:45 PM
3

I actually found this quite amusing OP It reminds me of when I was in the initial phase of this hell. I was convinced that I would hardly see my kids My mother sat me down and told me ‘that won’t happen, the kids will drive her nuts and she will be begging you to take them’ Lo and behold that 50/50 custody was agreed Always listen to mummy fellas
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 06:57 AM
1

Good advice
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/26 10:13 PM
6

No mate The problem is that you took your wife back after cheating twice And now we’re here Who cares if it’s middle of winter? Take charge of this situation, try and win back some dignity and get to a lawyer to start proceedings
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 09:28 PM
5

I mean that’s it’s highly likely she’s met someone at work and is having an affair Women usually nuke marriages when someone is waiting in the wings to take over I would be asking some serious questions mate
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 07:15 PM
6

A new job? That’s the first red flag mate A coworker has agreed to take her on Do some digging bro That excitement is going to turn into horror soon bro. Be prepared. She’s gone and now she’s the enemy Once you’ve dealt with the initial shock, go into strategy mode Be calculating and businesslike She’s dead to you now An empty vessel We are all here for you brother Time to go to war
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 06:23 PM
5

Of course she’s trying to influence him They don’t even know they’re doing it half the time. It’s an inbuilt mechanism My wee girl is constantly telling me what her mum is saying. I laugh it off however I’m not going to lie, sometimes it gets under my skin. We’re only human, mate Cool heads prevail. Pick your battles
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 04:53 PM
4

Don’t gaslight yourself mate The only person you have to answer to now is yourself
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/26 03:29 PM
3

Totally get this mate I find it very hard to maintain eye contact with my ex. She disgusts me. She’s not even human. On school parents nights, I have to feign interest and small chat. It drains me. I cannot wait till the kids can start taking care of themselves. That will lessen contact
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/26 03:27 PM
19

I did a fair bit of damage on the apps. Not gonna lie, getting my dick wet was therapy. They’re tools. Some can use them and some can’t. If it works, have at it
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/26 08:32 AM
5

It’s like a near death experience It gives you a different outlook on life itself with a new sense of appreciation.
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 08:57 AM
2

Fair enough mate, I’m in Scotland so I’m not totally up to scratch with how divorce works in the USA. I’ll never wrap my head around why women want to keep the kids away from dad. Don’t they realise that everyone, at some point in their lives, will want to connect with the man that sired them? And when they do, they’re going to hear some truth bombs that will have consequences for the mother
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 08:53 AM
5

We all have these moments during divorce mate It’s how we navigate them I literally was in a car with the last remains of my marital home, heading to the dump. I got a call from the lawyer while in the car that my house sale had fallen through I was sitting there with my head squinted because I had a double bed headboard in the back sea, only to be told that I was now going back to a shell of a house with no furniture… And my kids were staying with me I also had a house offer in place which was …
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 08:48 AM
2

Man up and take charge here You’re letting her dictate dad time Go and tell the kid you’re taking her for ice cream or something then take it from there. They’re kids mate. They can’t even choose which clothes to wear yet so don’t be letting them dictate whats happening from this moment on
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 08:41 AM
1

Couldn’t have helped that much if you’re divorced now bro
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 07:46 AM
1

I love how it comes down to ‘parenting skills’ Can someone clearly define such a concept? And why are her family dictating? Honestly man, lawyers are total scumbags peddling on the misery of others. Tell your lawyer to get this shit dealt with pronto. What is there to defend? Is there proof?
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 07:37 AM
1

The old co worker I’m sure that’s all above board and totally legit
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/26 08:26 AM
6

Haha the only ‘stretch’ here is you thinking this is the ‘home stretch’ You haven’t even warmed up mate Good luck regardless. You’re in for hell of a ride
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/26 02:43 PM
6

You’ll be waiting a long time for that wish to come true mate. You know what they’re like
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/26 06:14 AM
3

That affair fog has some super powers at times bro
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/26 06:12 AM
3

Exactly mate
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/26 06:01 AM
5

Start by going to a solicitor/lawyer and letting them do the graft
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 06:57 AM
4

We all make these mistakes mate. You’re a good man, your ex knows this and took advantage of it. Incidents like this will force you to create boundaries over time as you calibrate to your new reality. It’s not an instant process. And don’t deny yourself the feelings that may overwhelm you at points. Accept them, because they’re totally normal and human, then move on with your day. Good luck mate. It’s a long process.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 05:32 AM
2

Sounds like this one has been a smoother process than most of the stories on here bro. You’re out the fire now mate Feels good!
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/26 10:56 PM
3

I came out better off than I went into my marriage as I made a tidy profit on the house sale. Managed to snag myself a great wee flat out of it and my outgoings are considerably less than when I was married. Divorces are all about leverage mate. Not all men are going to be divorce bummed.
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/26 10:51 PM
13

Stick to the plan mate Let the lawyers do the work
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/26 04:14 PM
1

Jesus Christ So bad boy sperminator pumped and dumped your missus and left her with a bun in the oven And now she wants you to bring the kid up Seems like you have a really difficult decision to make here Go with your heart bro! Seriously though GTFO
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/26 09:48 AM
2

I zone out when the kids are asleep by smoking weed and playing Civilization 6 on the X Box. That takes my mind right off things while getting some much needed rest.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 05:44 PM
26

He cares because his life has been nuked. He’s just venting. He’ll figure it out in due course. Most of us do.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 05:42 PM
7

The cheats always punch down The APs are easier to control
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 05:40 PM
9

Mate, my life is a constant juggle of holidays at work to accommodate my time with the kids. It’s a nightmare at times and brings a degree of stress that I cannot be arsed with at times…. However I demanded 50/50 so I need to man the feck up and be there for my kids so it is what it is The kids will remember their dad was a good man who was always there for them. That will bring me more peace in my dying days than having to pick up a wage packet. In saying that, your priority is your career beca…
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 06:50 AM
11

If you find yourself at a sex therapists, hoping that your wife is going to finally open her legs then you’ll be waiting quite the while and be all the poorer for it. You wanted to make this work mate. You’re a good man. Get out while you can. You’re still young.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 06:45 AM
5

You do when you first experience it Then it’s a tool to identify where you’re relationship is heading As soon as the sex stops, get the hell out of there guys
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 06:40 AM
5

You were worried about what you were going to lose mate That’s the worry that plagued us all. All you lost was a dark presence, haunting your every move Well rid mate
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/26 09:48 AM
13

It’s fine to panic over what’s to come because it’s new territory Remember though bro, we ALWAYS calibrate Humans are designed to adapt Being a dad became way better for me, when I got divorced. No nagging wife looking over your shoulder. Total bliss.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/26 06:30 AM
8

You’ll handle it fine mate In fact, you’ll look forward having some me time. That way you can re charge for the kids when they’re on dad time. Honestly mate, I don’t care what anyone says…. Being divorced is infinitely superior to being married
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/26 06:28 AM
5

This is a fair shout The act of betrayal adds a certain je ne sais quoi to the divorce journey
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/26 06:45 PM
17

Pain shopping never ends well bro However seek solace in the fact that your ex is now simulating oral sex with reconstituted meat. That’s quite the fall from grace. Bullet dodged mate.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/26 05:59 AM
2

An emotional affair Affairs become emotional once the participants of said affair have had sex Trust me mate
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/26 08:29 AM
1

Lawyers see dollar signs when people like your ex wife walk into the office Spending money to contest the most trivial of shit. Horrible that you need to deal with this maniac, mate.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/26 07:43 AM
4

Let it go mate
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/26 08:15 AM
16

No doubt the lawyer or some of her bitter friends had a word in her ear
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 08:53 PM
1

Must have touched a nerve there Go grab a can of pop from the fridge and relax mate
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 06:01 PM
0

You’re being a bit catastrophic here mate He’s not going to lose his kids lol
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 02:54 PM
2

Yeah I actually tell my boy that if he’s going to cry, makes sure it’s something worth crying about. My house, my rules
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 02:53 PM
5

She’s trying to creep shame you mate However in saying that, I’d have the boys in their own bed from now on mate. You’re raising men.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 12:51 PM
11

I can’t read this because of the lack of paragraphs however I know exactly what is contained within. She’s way ahead of you mate. Way ahead. Time to dust off, ditch the petted lip and make plans. She’s having an affair bro so that may give you leverage at this point, purely through her just wanting you to gtfo. You make her skin crawl so use that to your advantage Lawyer up bro and get your business head on. Stay away from the booze as well
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 07:39 AM
0

Hear hear old chap!
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/26 12:10 PM
3

When she says ‘you’re not the man to give her it anymore’.. What she really means is ‘I’m bouncing on some new dick! You’re not required anymore’ Keep this in mind and detach yourself now mate. She’s gone. She is an adversary.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/26 12:09 PM
5

This is all part of the process mate. Sounds like you’re taking action. She actually doing you a favour by suggesting seperate apartments. She could be a really evil bitch and bring the new guy she’s boning, which she is btw, into your apartment. It’s business now mate. Get your business done with as little turmoil as possible and move on with your life now. You’re a free man
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/26 12:06 PM
4

Jesus man The stay at home mom That’s divorce final boss level Good luck with this one mate. My heart goes out to you
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 05:24 PM
2

No point Will give short term gratification however long term it’s a bad move The less animosity, the cleaner the divorce OP should go into business mode and get what’s his
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 05:11 PM
7

FWB ffs The full shebang and you’re playing Jimmy Good Guy here Grow a spine mate File
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 05:07 PM
14

I’m in Scotland mate. It’s normal to feel this way. Totally normal. So embrace it, savour it and let it pass. There’s going to be more dark truth uncovered down the road as well mate. Believe me. There are things she’s not telling you… Join a gym Start a martial art Watch YouTube videos on how to level up your wardrobe Drink lots of water Go for long walks Connect with the friends you lost during your marriage These options are available now. Use them The best 2 bits of advice I recieved when go…
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 11:25 AM
3

Mate, this post along with countless others that pop up regularly clearly demonstrate one thing…. The vast majority of men recover after this hellish experience and go on to live a better life One they dreamed about If you’re still lamenting over your divorce, 5 years later, then it’s ‘you issue’ at this point.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 07:08 AM
3

I enjoy it because I used to fantasise about it
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 07:04 AM
0

Your life feels like a mess because it is a mess mate…. Your life as you know it is being nuked before your very eyes and we all know that nukes leave an unholy amount of mess… It’s fine to feel this way bro. This is the beginning. You’ll calibrate. We all do. Just get through the day and be there for your kids. That’s all you can really control at this point. You’ve also got leverage now that the daft bint went and phoned the cops, getting herself tossed in the tin can. Take that one as a win b…
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/26 07:51 AM
10

Mate it actually sounds to me like you’re getting better. You’re doing all the right things Keep going.
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/26 11:02 PM
0

Being granted freedom from the hellscape that is marriage? A failure? I’ll crack the jokes
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/26 09:10 AM
2

Of course she said it was nothing. She was waiting to see if you would accept that as the ‘truth’… Which it likely isn’t. No doubt it’s a bit more than she’s letting on mate I’d be doing a bit more digging if I were you
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/26 06:57 AM
4

I would love to see the stats on how many marriages are saved after ‘couples therapy’ I’d imagine the probabilities of success are virtually zero What a scam
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/26 06:51 AM
16

On paper, another relationship is a disastrous idea. Relationships consume resources, the most being your time. However you can’t predict human nature at times. Women are great to spend time with and when you meet a good one, your lizard brain kicks in. Just stay single until you meet a woman who makes you feel good and you can’t keep your hands off of
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 01:35 PM
2

I get it mate Lots of great advice on here, mostly good and some not so We’re all hurting right now or we’re hurt in the past If religion gets you through in then more power to you
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 07:23 AM
2

Well you don’t do yourself any favours with your opening gambit Plenty on here have been through similar or even worse
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 06:45 AM
4

‘Others on this forum don’t understand’… Yet you give pretty much the same advice as these ‘others’ and wrap it up with some religious woo woo sky fairy vibes Weird take
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 06:17 AM
11

Good post bro 50/50 is the ultimate scenario for men Half the time is dad time Half the time is me time What’s not to love?
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 02:40 PM
21

Bro man up and start the divorce ball rolling Shes letting another man shoot his load inside her Doesn’t that disgust you? Believe me mate, this is your chance to be a man. If you take her back, your life will be hell and your mental health will be destroyed
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 06:21 AM
6

Mate, your letting her dictate your happiness. Moping about, ruminating, letting your apartment get in a mess. Come on mate. You’re letting this cheating bitch validate her horrific behaviour. In her head she’s like ‘bullet dodged there!’ And for good reason because you’re giving her ammo. Level up your wardrobe Hit the gym Do cardio Eat meat and veg 80% of the time Do 25 push ups or burpees everytime she enters your head Get out and talk to people. Exercise that social muscle. Drink 2l of water…
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/26 05:08 PM
6

All that cash spunked up a wall just for a judge to tell you both to act like a pair of grown ups. Your first mistake was dancing to her tune. She goaded you and you fell for it. Don’t stress over it though. We all make that mistake and will make more down the line. Sometimes you need to bite your lip with them mate and bide your time. Cool heads prevail. You will work it out eventually as we all do brother.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/26 09:30 AM
6

Unless you’re an absolute monster, marriages are 50/50 mate. We all have our part to play. Even the wife… However, they check out 6-12 months before dropping the bomb usually. By that point, you have clarity and the behaviour she’s been exhibiting for the last 6 months, starts to make total sense. Realisation is further compounded by her being way ahead of you in terms of building a divorce strategy. At this point, you’re HER enemy. That’s why she’s colder than a witches tit Now she’s YOUR enemy…
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/26 07:54 AM
3

My ex was a clean freak. Actually broke down in tears one day because I never ruffled the curtains properly. What a nightmare existence Now it’s daddies rules. Tidying up gets done when they’re at mummies.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/26 06:15 PM
4

Yep totally agree with this. Well put.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/26 05:45 PM
1

Mate she’s putting you under the hammer. A weaker man would erupt and bring the pain into both his and her life. Some men would even snap and do the unthinkable. You’re owning this mate. This will define you. Keep the head up. It will get better
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/26 08:49 AM
8

If a woman is withholding sex, it’s because her needs aren’t being met Not your needs Hers That’s how it’s supposed to work right? Lawyer up, file, fire your arse on the apps then get your dick wet Time to feel like a man again bro Go get your needs met
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 02:37 PM
4

This is why divorce bros need to treat this like business.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 04:51 PM
2

I love this. This man knows
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 04:50 PM
3

Dark times bro Just get your head down and get through it. I’ve been there and it’s horrific but life is good now. Yours will be too mate I promise
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 08:28 AM
12

You need to question these guys who will happily go round and bone some chick knowing her ex is sitting downstairs So many thirsty guys out there. They would literally feck a hole in a dolphins head
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 06:40 AM
2

50/50 is fairly straightforward It gets a bit more complex when you meet a new partner. Then you’re working full time, have the kids half the time and have to fit the new GF in there as well That’s the part most people don’t tell you about. You will be begging for some me time by that point, trust me mate
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 08:43 PM
4

Mindset All mindset So what if she does cheat? Women suck resources right out of your life (time, money etc) If she cheats, you extract and move on, considerably richer in resources. You’ve been through this before champ. You can whether any storm now. Have fun with life mate.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 07:01 AM
-4

I don’t really care mate My take. You’re more than welcome to criticise it.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 06:49 AM
-7

Divorce coach? What a scam My divorce ‘coach’ was a couple of mates who would take my phone calls and this place Wouldn’t have changed it for the world Psycho therapy woo woo bull crap Men don’t need therapy. They just need pointed in the right direction
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 06:02 AM
22

Lawyer up bro You have leverage Lots of leverage If the shoe was on the other foot, your hair would be turning white when the lawyers letters start coming through the postbox Take her down.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 05:59 AM
1

My ex did the same and ultimately it’s what ended our marriage
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 10:09 AM
2

Bro going to a dance class while still married is a bit suspect but hanging out with teenage girls? Jeez Louise this is asking for trouble Women tend to hate other women but older women have a particular hatred for the younger ones I’ve got a sneaky suspicion your wife is going to go full Rambo here Lawyer up hard mate. Do it now
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 07:13 PM
2

Yep There is more pain coming that’s for sure
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 12:59 PM
3

This is normal Phone a friend or a male family member They will listen. Do it as soon as you can Don’t tell your mum or sister right now. Save that for later. It will pass
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 10:03 AM
6

Nothing You’re turning it into a tit for tat battle which always ends in tears. You’ll feel good for a few minutes however nothing will dampen the pain that comes with knowing your stbxw is a whore Get to a lawyer and let them go the heavy lifting Your new life starts now
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 07:54 AM
8

I’m sorry bro but this is a classic example of what not to do in a divorce situation Jesus man, get back into your own house, get the voice recorder hooked up and bunker down. She’s going nowhere as long as you continue to rent somewhere else oh my Lord
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/26 05:55 PM
2

Well said!
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/26 12:48 PM
12

Are you sure he’s a ‘new guy’ mate? He’s not as new as you think mate, trust me
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/26 11:08 AM
1

Defo but they check out months beforehand while us chumps are usually unaware, living the impossible dream
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/26 07:23 AM
3

All he’s interested in is dragging this crap out and lining his pockets
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 08:15 PM
4

Sounds sketchy as hell. The sort of stuff that only a lawyer could come up with. She’s defo fighting dirty. You’re gonna have to get a lawyer in who can go toe to toe with this
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 08:10 PM
14

I would have loved to found my ex’s new man on IG I had to settle for finding him cowering in a room while I was still married to my ex Embrace it bro. These brutal moments actually bring closure. You’ll be laughing about it in a year or two mate
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 07:12 PM
5

Heavy AI vibes
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 05:36 PM
9

It’s horrific mate Lots of us in here have been in your very shoes She’s got a head start on you bro Suck it up. No one is coming to save you. Let her go. She’s some other guys issue now. She’s merely a business transaction now. The only thing you can do right now is start to make plans. Don’t mope about. Get busy.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 01:32 PM
8

Usually means a co worker or some guy at her new gym have been sniffing about
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 07:23 AM
3

What did you actually do that demands such forgiveness? Bro you’re going through one of the harshest experiences a man will suffer. Leave the forgiveness to the spiritual happy clappers. Men just need a good slap round the back of the head and told to get to work. You’ve got this bro. You’re 5 times the man you were when you were trapped in a hopeless marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 07:28 PM
2

I second this Get in touch with some old friends. They will be happy to hear from you.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 07:24 PM
2

Keep me posted mate I’m in Scotland. Always happy to help a guy out in a time like this
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 02:37 PM
2

Think about it mate She’s happy for you to trot off to your old man’s gaff. You’ll be cooped up in your old wanking chariot while she’s moving the next guy into your old ‘forever home’ The entitlement is unreal. She works mate so she’s not entitled to legal aid. That means she will be paying for solicitors. Believe me, that will grow old fast. Just sit her down and tell her that you want the house on the market. That’s completely fair. If she wants to take it to court then she’s going to be payi…
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 02:31 PM
2

No mate Dig in You need that equity as much as she does. You have to have a comfortable home for the kids, not just mummy! She’s an enemy now. I mean, her offer of keeping the house says it all. Get the house on the market. She’s trying to play you for a fool.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 01:20 PM
5

Jesus man, some of these women. You messed up by being totally transparent with her. Lesson learned. Play the game mate however at the same time, dad is allowed to cut loose once in a while. She doesn’t need to know everything so shake the divorced dad guilt out your system You’re a good dad.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 10:19 AM
19

New gym buddies and looking the best she’s ever looked…. I think we know where this one is heading
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 09:01 AM
2

Never let fear guide your actions If another woman cheats on you then you have the necessary tools to deal with it having been through it before. Never let the actions of your morally repugnant ex guide you in anyway. If you meet someone who you genuinely click with, those feelings won’t exist
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 05:49 AM
3

It’s brilliant mate Mines are 5 and 6 so sometimes I’m begging to hand them back! I love my kids to pieces but by god, me time is essential
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/25 09:12 AM
6

Bro as soon as you get used to having some actual free time to yourself, you’ll adapt. You’ll actually start to look forward to the days you have to yourself as much as the days when you’re in dad mode. This isn’t the end of the world mate. It’s the beginning of your new exciting life A life which you’re kids will be part of because happy dad = happy kids
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/25 08:59 AM
15

Bro the priority right now is YOU Not your kids, not the ex. None of them. YOU. Your first port of call is the employment situation. Men are supposed to be busy. Men are supposed to work. Men who don’t work are highly susceptible to mental health issues. The devil makes good use of idle hands. Once you have money coming in, then you have options. Right now you have no options and are sitting about ruminating. Get the job situation sorted out mate. That will get the ball rolling
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/25 07:44 AM
2

Are these women actively encouraged by their lawyers to create false allegations? It’s crazy how it seems to almost be the norm. I suppose when money is involved then as far as they are concerned, the gloves are off. The American justice system seems to operate on the premise that’s it’s still 1860 and a man is obliged to take care of a woman for the rest of her waking life.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/25 07:38 AM
14

It’s always an affair mate, trust me Man up and ditch her. Or face a lifetime of mental torture
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/25 05:18 PM
7

Resilience is built through this horror Embrace it. It won’t last forever….. Unless you leave her with the house!
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/25 12:42 PM
5

That’s fine….. If you’d rather rent for god knows how long while you’re likely paying the mortgage on your stbxw’s new ‘forever’ home
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/25 12:41 PM
3

They’re only amicable up until their friends and lawyers get in there ear, telling them what they can go for Lawyer up bro
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/25 07:26 AM
7

You’re 60 an your bro is 70 If there is one thing I have learned about fellas of a certain vintage, is that they never back down from an argument so basically I’d put that interaction to the back of your head right now… Who cares what your brother thinks. He sounds like he thinks marriage is a Disney cartoon or a Richard Gere movie. Your wife has clearly checked out. When they start crushing your ‘dreams’ then it’s over. You know this deep down because your gut has likely been telling you. Forge…
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/25 07:18 AM
1

Technically it should be straightforward. No kids is a divorce on cheat mode. 50/50 everything then you’re a free man
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/25 08:49 PM
2

Mummy knows best mate Listen to your mum Dig in, have some dignity and get your half.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/25 06:44 AM
5

Don’t be scared mate You will re calibrate We always work it out
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/25 07:30 AM
4

You will never please them mate In fact the more you try to please them, the more angry they will become. Yet they can’t see it. Then they have their friends fuel the anger even more because women love the company of other miserable women.. Because misery = gossip You can’t win. Just live life on your own terms.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/25 07:08 AM
11

I feel 10x better being a divorced dad More quality time with my kids on my terms Also get free time to get the identity I lost during marriage, back. Which In turn makes me happier Cos happier dad means happier times for the kids
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/25 07:02 AM
14

You can never get enough of these messages Every man should experience a divorce at some point in his life. They harden you the feck up
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/25 12:12 PM
6

Get that house sold and get half your money bro This is a non negotiable. You’re on your own now so you’re number 1. Forget about her cos you can be rest assured, she forgot about you a long time ago
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/25 07:08 AM
9

Merry Christmas guys and thank the Lord for freeing you from the wives who made your life hell. Freedom!
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/25 07:52 PM
4

Sounds like a nightmare. Use that SAHD status as leverage bro and alimony her arse.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/25 07:50 PM
3

Red pill woo woo dirge OP time to start making moves. She’s gone and she’s either letting some other guy explore her vag or is gearing up for it.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/25 03:46 PM
2

No one can answer this question because every divorce is borne through a set of circumstance which tend to dictate how it’s going to pan out. In your case, you’re initiating which means your STBXW is going to bring the pain. Rejection is mind bogglingly hard for a woman and they tend to lash out.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/25 09:03 PM
9

Sex is definitely a need for a man and your wife is definitely fulfilling someone’s needs. Unfortunately it’s not your needs Time to do a bit more digging mate.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/25 08:27 AM
10

Sucks at first however I am not going to lie, I enjoy my kid free time as well. Good to recharge and get the old identity back!
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/25 09:28 PM
6

A very common tale my man
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/25 05:29 PM
5

An SAHM in California That is divorce on hardcore mode. I don’t envy you mate
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/25 05:27 PM
11

Just focus on yourself mate. She’s not worth it. She’s some other guys issue now. You’re free.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/25 08:10 AM
5

I think it communicates stability more than anything Women seem to admire men who show up for their kids because contrary to what you read on here, a sizeable amount of men check out from the family life
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/25 09:17 PM
6

I rinsed tinder and FB dating To be honest I was only looking for something physical. I’m not going to lie, it accelerated the healing process I met my current partner organically through my job. I swore to god I wouldn’t get involved again however she’s very attractive, has a great body and is such a sweet, loving person. Everything my ex wasn’t. How can a guy pass that up! For context, I’m not the most attractive guy in the world. Balding 5ft 7 Not a good looker However being a single dad in y…
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/25 03:53 PM
19

She cheated mate and likely still is. 99% of the guys reading this know this to be the case cos we’ve been there. Just dig in mate and lawyer up. It gets better, trust me
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/25 06:36 PM
1

Yes mate, I’m in Scotland If she’s unemployed and has been a stay at home mum then she’s got leverage If she works full time then the playing field is more level
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/25 12:21 PM
2

Listen to this guy
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/25 12:09 PM
1

If you initiate a divorce your unemployed wife is likely to be granted legal aid Which is like a money glitch. She can use solicitors for every whim and desire. She’ll stagger that house sale for years, easily. And you’ll be so far out of pocket that it will take you years to get back on your feet. Encourage her to have an affair mate as well as get job.
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/25 02:39 PM
6

Bro she has done you a massive favour Freedom! Go enjoy yourself mate. She’s some other idiot’s problem now
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/25 01:46 PM
7

Ain’t that the truth
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/25 05:59 PM
1

Ok mate Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/25 01:22 PM
2

Just keep going through hell bro There’s light at the other side and you’ll get there. This will be the making of you.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/25 11:58 AM
7

Get to a lawyer and let them guide you through the process mate. She’s probably spoken to 5 at this point. She is so far ahead of you now. Trust me. You’re up against the noise in her head. A woman is never at fault remember. She thinks you’re not letting her life she ‘deserves’ Call her bluff bro Getting divorced is brutal but being divorced is AMAZING
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/25 06:26 AM
14

Mate she gave you kids and a life that most men ache for Try and frame it that way because you’re using energy when you ruminate on her female nature Energy that could be used elevating your skill set and game. She’s not worth the energy any more my man However you are.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/25 07:16 AM
26

I don’t think I ever heard my ex mutter the words sorry throughout our whole relationship Can women even pronounce the word?
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/25 02:09 PM
9

Do not listen to this guy.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/25 07:22 AM
18

Mate she’s letting this idiot do things to her that she told you were too ‘dirty’ when you suggested them And they’re laughing at you while doing so However it isn’t your fault that your soon to be ex wife is a slut who couldn’t do the honourable thing and tell you that the marriage was over. She chose another way. Time to chose your way bro Lawyer up
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/25 04:42 AM
4

Ok fair enough mate Forgot about her issues. They’re not your problem anymore. Take charge of what you can control Fitness, dress sense, dating, kids Once you hone in on them, everything will start to fall into place Be pro active. Do things when you start ruminating. Anything. Anxiety and rumination are borne of procrastination
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/25 08:45 AM
8

It gets better when both parties have moved on. You clearly haven’t. Your relationship is dead however your ex wants to have her cake and eat it. The guy who’s banging her nowadays will be getting told about how she has an ‘awesome’ relationship with her ex hubby and they still go on holidays together and stuff. But it’s just her trying to control the narrative and mitigate any red flags for a potential suitor. From now on, grey rock and communicate only about the kids Time to harden up bro. She…
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/25 08:22 AM
1

It’s blatant What adult wants to spend all their time with their teenagers? Teenagers are a nightmare!
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/25 08:12 PM
14

She doesn’t want you to have 50/50 because she wants as much cash as she can get from you She’s financially weaponising her own kids which means that she’s the one who’s potentially creating trauma by denying her kids the right to see their dad as much as they should. 14 year olds don’t need child care the same way 6 years olds do. Your ex is at it. Ignore her and let the lawyers do the heavy lifting
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/25 08:01 PM
9

Bro she said she wants a divorce. She has let the cat out the bag which means she is planning her next few moves. She’s in front of you and will likely pull the rug from under your feet while you’re pre occupied with all this woo woo shit. Time to knuckle down and decide if YOU want to take your life back.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/25 07:42 AM
2

Nobody beats the biz!
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/25 10:09 PM
2

Crazy to think that granny was being paid to babysit her own grandkids That was the first red flag
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/25 07:26 AM
4

The starting point is Is she a stay at home mom? Are you filing? If so, then your lawyer is right
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/25 10:41 AM
5

All I can tell you is this bro… If you’re calling for divorce then it’s hell hath no fury mode. Women are not used to being rejected and lash out hard. You know what this entails when it comes to divorce. If she files then the divorce process is likely to be smoother, even more so if their is a new guy on the scene Divorces ONLY become amicable when both parties have moved on.
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/25 09:45 AM
8

Go for it mate Having fun with other women is a tried and tested way for getting over the ex. Divorce bros have been doing it for centuries because it works.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/25 09:12 PM
10

‘I just want to hear “I love you” from the person I built a family with’ You’re going to be waiting a long, long time for that mate. She’s would have checked out at least 6 months/a year before she told you she wanted to separate. In fact, she’s probably boning some other guy right now. You’re not super dad to her mate. You’re an annoyance who won’t let her get on with her life. And those moments of ‘vulnerability’ you feel like displaying have her dry heaving vomit. Keep these thoughts in your …
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/25 11:58 AM
1

I remember that phoning other dudes part Character building some would say
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/25 07:52 AM
1

Cohabitation is a hostage experience for both Bleak and morbidly depressing Things will only get better when you are out of each others faces. I actually get a chill up my spine thinking about the time when I had to do it
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/25 07:51 AM
5

So she flipped out because you took photos of her friend? Are you hiding more details here mate? If she thinks you have cheated then she’s going to nuke your ass. That’s how it works. Find a good lawyer mate. Pronto
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/25 07:43 AM
4

Mate, file for divorce asap Your lawyer sounds like a bum. A year lol. Mate she is making moves to divorce you, I can assure you. She’s likely 5 steps ahead. Time to go to war bro. You will come out of this alive, believe me
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/25 03:43 PM
13

I’ve had the opposite problem I’ve literally had to crack a couple off pre date so I can ensure I don’t explode within seconds I’d be savouring that ‘problem’ mate
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/25 08:11 AM
18

“I think I’m just gonna quit and wait five more years and see if the female collective mindset adjusts for women 40-56” I’ll crack the jokes mate
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/25 04:36 PM
8

A fake person You said it yourself mate. The mask slips once the divorce kicks in. Thats who she really was and no doubt still is. It’s ok to feel this way mate. Soak it up because it hasn’t taken you down yet But it will eventually if you continue to let her dictate your mental well being. Thats what you control. Not her so don’t let her. Gym, calisthenics, cardio, BJJ, clean diet for the body Getting out and about, working that social muscle for the mind. Don’t let her own your mind bro, you h…
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/25 07:35 AM
3

Quality advice here.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/25 01:25 PM
3

Women rarely, and I mean rarely, nuke a wedding unless some other chump is lurking in the shadows.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/25 12:21 PM
1

Absolute textbook mate.
/r/Divorce_Men15/11/25 07:44 PM
15

‘Blamed her unhappiness on me’ After confessing to being a nasty ass skank. You couldn’t mark her neck with a blowtorch. It’s textbook. 99% of us reading this know exactly how this plays out. Get in touch with a friend or family member. Tell them everything. They will listen. Get it off your chest. Give yourself a couple of days to calibrate. You will. Then it’s time to think business
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/25 10:50 AM
19

Listen mate, here’s a wee story for you My ex told me she was planning to introduce my 2 kids to her AP, 2 weeks after I caught them at it in my house I put my foot down however had to relent eventually because you know why? It was something that ultimately, I couldn’t control. Trying to control it made the stress worse. Now? My kids and ex stay with AP. You get used to it mate. Like we do with most things in life. However listen to this…. The other day I’m out with my 6 year old daughter and sh…
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 07:18 AM
6

Mate this is the time for activating tinder and putting in an order for some boner meds Plough the fields bro. Have fun. The best post divorce therapy for men is exploring new vagina. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. This has worked for men since day dot. You’ll know when you’re ready to take things a bit further. We always figure it out bro. You’re doing well bro. This nightmare will be over soon and you’ll be a new man ready to take on the world and do some damage!
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 07:07 AM
5

Bro, she’s banging this guy and has been for at least the last few months She hates you now. You’re an obstacle to her. Keep that in mind when you go into pining mode Her and her old codger boyfriend are having a good laugh at your expense after hot sex while creating strategies to f%k you over. Soak it up, absorb the pain then start to figure out your next move. This is the best opportunity you will ever have to truly grow as a man and it begins with framing this as business You are due half of…
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 02:54 PM
6

Embrace the hurt mate. Don’t deny it. However don’t bathe in it. No one cares about you mate. Your friends have their own problems. Once you accept that then it’s time to take action. Transform that hurt into fuel. The benefits of being a man are that we think logically. Use that to your advantage. Take the emotion out the game. It’s business now. Your business is getting what you deserve. Accept nothing less. She’s the enemy now. Go make us all proud bro.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 09:06 AM
5

Yep Single women make women single
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 07:30 AM
6

It does get better There are countless stories in here where men have prospered after the most horrific experience in their lives. Because that’s what divorce is. A horrific experience. And if you get through it intact then the world becomes your oyster. Iron is forged by flames.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 07:29 AM
17

Bro, your story reflects mine Had to leave a nice house for ex housing association. No big deal. My own pad where I have total control. Mindset, mate. Do you think your ex is moping about right now? Most likely too busy riding the dicklodocus express to even think about it. You’re in a great position. You have total control over your life and don’t have your ex hovering about. Make it happen. No woman wants a man who’s moping about. That’s dries up a vag like global warming. You’re in control ma…
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 07:26 AM
2

Divorce without kids? That’s divorce on cheat mode mate. Savour it. Accept it’s over and move on. In a years time, you’ll have a laugh to yourself about this.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 10:00 AM
14

Your heartache will stop once another woman appears on the scene Which will be unlikely if you’re continuing to mope around Your wife checked out, allowed herself to move on then blindsided you. Forcing you down a dark hole. Keep that in mind when your moping about the lounge wishing you could turn back time Get jacked, improve wardrobe, do cardio, actively look for a new hobby, start a martial art. No one is coming to save you bro. No one cares. Take control and exploit the fact that your ex, a…
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/25 07:38 AM
6

How do you know you’re not her ‘type’? Ramp it up mate. If you don’t you will regret it. However picking up the kids from school might become a little awkward
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/25 07:33 AM
2

Even your ex knew this was a bonkers idea. What the actual…. Mate, she’s an enemy now. Time to go Rambo
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/25 07:30 AM
1

I just went for it mate. Don’t overthink it Your GF will be a new shiny thing for them and they will take to her because that’s what kids at that age do. Becomes more troublesome as they get older Just make sure this one’s a keeper because the kids could become attached
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/25 10:28 PM
8

She only wants you round at Chrimbo because her boyfriend is taking a wide berth Wait till next year though mate when he’s a bit more ‘comfortable’ with the situation You’ll be discarded like a used condom. Keep that in mind once she brings up this ridiculous idea again
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 11:27 AM
3

Great post. You should actually do a separate thread for this because its super helpful
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/25 05:27 AM
10

Mate she checked out a year ago which is why she has no qualms with regards to getting her backside panned in by Chad while you fester at home She is dead to you now. A ghost. Have a cry and let it all out but remember while you’re wishing things were rosy again, she is at least 5 moves ahead of you. Time to go to war mate. This will make or break you.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 08:34 PM
3

Mate, your story is very, very similar to mines My ex is still with AP. It was awkward initially however now, have no feelings towards him whatsoever. He seems like a dumbass in all honesty and I pity him. My ex is a piece of work. He’ll find out soon enough. In saying that, it’s in my best interests that they stay together because my kids will get some stability that way plus they seem to like him which stung at first but you make peace with it. You sound like you’re in a good place compared to…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 08:15 AM
11

My ex was too busy making me miserable to make coffee
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 01:47 PM
7

You forgot co-worker Chad Needs to be four horsemen bro
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 11:54 AM
14

Tell her to go and stay with the guy she’s now seeing. Women rarely nuke a marriage unless there is someone lurking in the shadows . Get digging mate, there is worse to come
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 03:45 AM
2

Yeah exactly. I’ve lifted for years so the general advice never really applied to guys like me and as lifting sessions, as you say, there is a lot of downtime. That’s why something new that required a degree of focus is beneficial. It will give your head a rest from these invasive thoughts for an hour or so. I get it mate. It’s hard as hell. Dating apps are a good distraction as well. Some guys need to ‘heal’ however getting your dick wet with a new woman is a tried and tested method to kickstar…
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 03:27 PM
3

Do more stuff with your kid. I’ve got 2 and kept myself busy with them when I had them. That got me through the worst of it because I genuinely didn’t have time to think about anything other than controlling two wee monsters! Take up a a martial art or activity/skill that requires a lot of focus. You’ll lay down new pathways on the brain while improving your fitness. I started BJJ when i caught my wife screwing around and it was a godsend. Either way, you’ll eventually figure it out. You need to…
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 03:17 PM
1

Feel free to DM me mate I’m in Scotland too
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/25 04:01 PM
1

Mate I’m UK as well. That doesn’t sound like a single dad problem. It sounds like you were unfortunate enough to bump into a couple of weirdos
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/25 04:00 PM
7

You’ll get there mate. Just treat it like business. Be strategic.
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/25 08:28 AM
2

Great comment bro.
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/25 09:59 AM
5

It’s very hard mate and it’s something that the guys on here who insist that you demand 50/50 fail to acknowledge at times Some guys just aren’t cut out for the single dad life and that’s completely understandable. It’s relentless and trying to work full time and arrange childcare will likely take a few year off your life with the constant stress . However with that in mind, your kid isn’t going to be young forever and things will become more manageable over time
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/25 09:57 AM
5

Great post mate The part about co habitation sent a chill up my spine as my situation was pretty much the same. Her going out banging AP while I watched the kids But we persevered mate, building resilience to carry us on to the next BS that life throws up. Guys, divorce will make or break a man. Don’t let it break you. They’re not worth it man
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/25 10:58 AM
2

She’s defo met someone else. Get digging, mate. The stay at home really is the divorce final boss. Good luck with this one bro
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 10:48 PM
1

This is a spot on take.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 10:47 PM
3

Having kids is definitely a bonus when it comes to dating, especially if you have 50/50. That means you’re committed because let’s not forget, a fair amount of men are more than happy to see the kids every second weekend. 50/50 is actually uncommon in my neck of the woods. I only learned about it on here lol. Women seem to appreciate that in my experience. The only issue is that you’re pulled in so many directions. Kids, work and a new lady means that you’re very rarely going to get any me time
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 10:46 PM
12

Mate this hasn’t been going on for 7 weeks This has been going on a while, maybe not physically but definitely emotionally which by the way, is possibly worse Get your things in order mate. It’s time to go to war. When you find yourself flagging and playing nice guy, just remember that she’s letting the physio have the nastiest sex ever and letting him do things she told you were ‘disgusting’. Do not give her an inch
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/25 09:27 AM
2

No he’s right She’s defo cheating.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/25 02:56 PM
12

When a woman checks out, it’s usually at least a year before you find out yourself By that point she’s 5 moves ahead on the chessboard While poor hubby is caught with his pants down. No wonder women think we’re dumb
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 11:49 AM
7

Yeah man however I’ve got kids That adds a certain spice to the divorce process for sure mate
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/25 01:52 PM
10

Takes a certain mindset to grey rock Easy to pull it off in say, the workplace. I tried it during the cohabitation process and it was impossible. Women know exactly how to get under your skin and hit you where it hurts
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/25 10:55 AM
4

I was in a very similar situation. My ex was insisting that my kids meet AP within weeks of me finding out about her affair I said this wasn’t happening until we stopped co habitation and had moved on. She actually agreed however I was told by a counsellor that I was ‘trying to control’ the situation and that I had to let go. I followed his advice and I’m glad I did. As horrible as it was at the time, it was going to happen at some point. I had to get it over with asap so I could focus on the th…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/25 12:44 PM
2

Good man It’s business now mate. Business. Get that house sold and split the cash. Make sure you get shared custody with the kids. That’s what you’re due at the very least. It’s a stressful time mate but you’ll come out of it a better man if you wether the storm
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/25 04:33 PM
1

Mate, she probably doesn’t qualify for legal aid so she’ll be footing the costs as well. Once she realises this, she’ll be more than happy to likely to play ball. You’re in survival mode right now mate. Cool heads prevail
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/25 01:31 PM
18

Yeah she has another guy She’s angry because in her head, you’re the obstacle. Time to get to war.
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/25 01:47 PM
6

I was on the apps within weeks of finding my ex having an affair Some in here wil say you have to ‘heal’ but as a man, that doesn’t make sense to me Men always healed from heartbreak by getting their dick wet.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/25 09:55 AM
1

Probably going to take flak for this however not all divorced dads are cut out for 50/50. The advice on here is always go for 50/50 but you ultimately have to weigh up if you can pull it off I’ve got 50/50 and tbh, it’s hard as hell trying to juggle child care and work. A constant stress.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/25 09:53 AM
2

That ain’t the only thing they’re blowing my bro
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/25 04:05 PM
12

My ex used to accuse me of cheating as well. Turned out she was the cheating POS. Funny how that works out. Your wife has been banging coworker bro for a good while and he has given her the green light to ditch your ass. Lawyer up, detach emotions, go into business mode and go for yours bro It will all work out in the end IF YOU KEEP A COOL HEAD
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/25 11:54 AM
3

You can bet your bottom dollar on it. They move faster than greased lighting while we sit feeling sorry for ourselves, sitting in our boxer shirts picking crumbs out of our belly buttons
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/25 06:59 AM
2

Yeah I said I was finished with women as well, once I discovered my ex was boning a co worker That lasted until I met a hot young lady. We are men bro. We cannot resist them. Do what you have to do bro. Delay but don’t deny
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/25 08:56 AM
6

Bro what are you upset about? Getting divorced is amazing. Freedom gained. A new life! Go do the things you couldn’t do when you were married.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/25 08:53 AM
8

Haha dude I love how you’re going through hell but still have time to ask about the dating scene. Classic. And you are going through hell mate. If your wife wants a divorce then give her one. You’ll come out a better man in the long run Post divorce life is the best life. It’s how I imagine those hostages who were chained to radiators back in 80s Beirut must have felt when they were set free and got back to their loved ones
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/25 05:11 PM
1

Jesus bro, if a mad gunman was in your house, you’d call the cops This is an emergency CALL A LAWYER
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/25 05:04 PM
0

Bro, if you initiate divorce then she is going to attempt to take you to the cleaners. Without a doubt. That’s what they do. Women initiate divorce and you’re fighting for 50/50 at the very least. And will be happy to do so. Put the shoe on the other foot however…. Prepare for scorched earth bro Ideal situation is she meets some co worker or another dude and develops feels.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/25 04:42 PM
2

Good mum? Yeah Good wife? I’ll crack the jokes
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/25 11:43 AM
3

I know mate. The gall on them at time. ‘Hey I banged coworker Chad and nuked your life however I promise I won’t come after your bank accounts’ Just get to a GOOD lawyer mate and do what they tell you. The anger will subside mate. Time to get strategic
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/25 05:19 AM
3

SAS style bro. In and out
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/25 02:52 PM
28

Bro she has been banging co worker Chad for months. She’s trickle truthing you. Lawyer up, detach your emotions and adopt the business mindset. It’s business now bro. She’s dead to you as are you to her. She will be under the affair fog so you’re likely to get what you want however move fast. The first 6 months will be hell however the dust will clear, you will get your life back and be a better man for it Check through the sub. Your story is VERY COMMON. We’ve all been there bro and most of us …
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/25 10:26 AM
1

If she is unemployed then she may be eligible for legal aid And that is a problem
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/25 04:05 PM
1

Just get to your solicitor asap and let them deal with it. Your ex is being weird and putting her own strange needs before your childs. A judge will see through this charade. And she will eventually snap as well and be begging you to take your child so she can live her best life
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/25 04:04 PM
5

Great post, very similar to my story! Guys, a divorce will make or break you. If it makes you, by god, you’re ready for anything Don’t let it break you
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/25 06:45 PM
1

It’s out of your control. You need to move on. This idea that you have to vet each other partners before they meet the kids is you trying to control the situation. You’re creating stress and anxiety. It’s going to happen at some point mate. And remember…. One day, the kids are going to meet your hot new girlfriend and your ex will have to deal with that. Swings and roundabouts mate. Jays be the best guy you can be and get on with your life.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/25 07:24 PM
1

Mate you are taking the brunt of the pain here. You are gaslighting yourself into next week. The majority of relationships operate on a 50/50 when it comes to the more toxic side of things. You played a part no doubt but it’s not all on you. Feel the pain mate and cry those tears out. They will subside eventually once the truth comes out because believe me, it will come out and you’re going to get angry. Embrace that too then act on it. Time to go to war mate because that’s what this is now
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/25 10:19 PM
8

Non related however my heart goes out to a lot of guys who have to initiate divorce. When the wife initiates, it tends to be the case that hubby has to fight for his life to win, key word WIN!, a 50/50 When hubby initiates, prepare for scorched earth Hell hath no fury…..
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/25 06:02 AM
2

Let her get toned. The minute she shacks up with the co worker she’s likely been banging, she will hit the love diet hard and end up putting that blubber back on. I’ve seen this play out countless times lol
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 03:37 PM
4

Bro I thought the same until I met my girlfriend Her being blonde, 15 years younger, having a hot body and oozing warmth along with empathy, forced me to change my outlook That and the fact that we’re men, we like to get our willies wet and we cannot resist a fine piece of ass!
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 03:32 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter