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shoganaiyo Archive

View 0 posts and 109 comments by shoganaiyo on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Relying on text for flirting and seduction might seem more comfortable but it's a big misstep if you actually intend to have a physical relationship. Too much gets lost in translation to properly build rapport, which is the most critical component to generating intimacy. Even worse, it sets up false expectations as to what a real encounter would be like. As a rule, you should stick to making plans with texting and the occasional brief exchange to keep them interested.
/r/seduction26/02/18 02:50 AM
1

We do all have our own path and it probably isn't fair to compare my results to others, but I get envious of how much easier it comes to some people. It's been about 5 years since I discovered seduction and some days it feels like I'm still working on the same things as day 1. When it gets tough it's hard not to write myself off as being too old to try and change as much as is needed. I just keep myself going because at the heart of it, I want to be a man who can handle any and all the social si…
/r/seduction06/02/18 03:20 AM
3

Is 29 a late bloomer? Oh jesus, I'm 37 and I feel that I've still barely scratched the surface.
/r/seduction06/02/18 03:02 AM
6

A woman's seduction game is different than a man's. Women are more choosy about their partners and look for guys who resonate the most with them while not giving off any red flags. It's not as straight-forward as many people here try to make it seem because a lot of guys front a boatload of confidence but become squeamish when they feel the power shift. Some guys will actually freak out when a woman randomly comes on to them because it sets off our 'too good to be true' alarm. To be able to sedu…
/r/seduction01/02/18 03:04 AM
7

How often are you having that kind of negative self talk? You need to talk better to yourself. It's ok to feel frustrated and disappointed when doesn't go the way you pictured it or hoped. Can I offer you some short term advise? Don't worry about approaching women right now, focus for a few weeks on better self talk. If we're talking in context of game, inner game is the far more important than outer game. But I also want to talk in context of self-care. That little self talk ("OH, I'm such a us…
/r/seduction27/01/18 10:16 PM
2

Why would you tell her to fuck off? Did she sleight you that badly or is it that the situation made brought up some anxious feelings and you need an outlet? Sure, what she did was pretty inconsiderate, but burning your bridges at this point seems like an overreaction. It's a sign of emotional maturity when you don't don't feel the need to 'get back' at people for your feelings. You can be mad about not getting your wallet back, that's pretty important, I'd be fucked without mine. You can even ac…
/r/seduction21/01/18 08:58 PM
1

Of course, why not? Just be cool about it. Treat it like you're making plans with a friend or family. You don't hang on the edge of your seat waiting for your friends to get back to you over asking if they want to meet up. You don't question whether you should or should not text your mom back when she says 'let me check and I'll get back to you'. You say sure, or ok, or you bet or whatever flavor you like. Over thinking it is what will make you stumble.
/r/seduction20/01/18 03:07 AM
4

I'd stop you right there. She's doubled down on her stance on not playing by giving you an out if that's what you really want. She's told you her boundaries so how can it be interpreted as respectful by crossing them? If you proceed to escalate when she is not receptive to it then it will end badly for both of you.
/r/seduction20/01/18 02:44 AM
9

Getting this advice will only make you improve in ways for a girl who's already nexted you. This is an important point to take in: the reasons for a girl being or not being interested in you are completely arbitrary and differ from person to person. Even if she tells you honestly, the next girl may have a completely different opinion on the same thing. And sometimes that reason is 'just because' and you just have to accept that's the way it will be sometimes. Sometimes there is no reason. No one…
/r/seduction18/01/18 10:44 PM
1

You can have a different experience than me, why not? We are different people and live different lives. My opinion comes from the many rants, comments and tirades from people I know and on social media about guys trying to pick them up. I've even seen people do their own PSA's about PUA's 'harassing' women and (paraphrasing) what a terrible blight it is on society that women can't just be left alone. It's often the usual suspects, but their impassioned speeches draw in a lot of moral support so …
/r/seduction06/01/18 02:15 AM
1

You're right about Vancouver. The people here are extremely snobby and egotistical to begin with made worse that PUA is frequently and publicly shunned. The women here do not typically get in your face but they will ice you and will act as gatekeepers for each other. There is a strong feminist and LGBT presence and you'll feel it walking into any bar or club here. You have to learn to work groups or you won't get far. There's a lot of misandry and distrust towards single men here, so you have an…
/r/seduction06/01/18 12:55 AM
1

When you get rejected, you just carry on. I'm going to take a wild stab and say that there aren't too many other girls on your horizon which is why you risked asking out a good friend instead of someone from a dating pool. Rejection always hurts but it's inevitable--not everyone is compatible with everyone else--and it's a critical tool to growth so try and learn from it. What you do is simple. You got your ego bruised, so take the time to do some self care, reflect on what happened, meditate on…
/r/seduction02/11/17 12:25 AM
3

Come on now. Having sex with a chubby girl is something to be ashamed of? Are you twelve? Get the fuck out. Those people you call friends are very insecure about your success otherwise they wouldn't need to try and put you beneath them. Be proud of your conquests.
/r/seduction01/11/17 05:35 PM
103

After sex is the best part, you should be swimming in happy brain chemicals, your body should be relaxed and have a naked woman draped around you. As long as you haven't been misrepresenting yourself or your intentions, the only awkwardness is what you bring. Shift your mentality, savour the moments after climax. That's the time you're supposed to lay back, relax and let the worries of the world melt away. If it's constantly awkward after sex, then you're probably having difficulty facing the re…
/r/seduction08/10/17 04:39 PM
5

What exactly are you looking to get out of this? If you want a relationship, you're setting yourself up for a very difficult and emotionally taxing ride. It's a lot of work to maintain an emotionally secure connection with someone over long distance for an extended period. You certainly can't do that over text alone, don't kid yourself. Prepare for routine video calls because texting is a terrible way to gain emotional rapport. Plus you have to wait months and one or both has to spend hundreds o…
/r/seduction20/08/17 08:10 PM
2

Seems pretty into Jesus and keeps making it clear she's not just trying to fuck. I've heard many variations of this and the phrase 'Want more than just a fuck' and that can mean a lot of things. Don't presume to know what she's ok with just from her religious background. She's not offering you a marriage proposal, she obviously is open to your advances if she let you suck her tits and is now inviting you out to 'Eat tacos' (see where's her mind's at?) she just doesn't want to be viewed as a slut…
/r/seduction04/06/17 10:22 PM
1

As a 35-year old who's just starting to learn seduction, you're doing just fine. Stop being so hard on yourself, you've got a lot more going on for you than you're giving yourself credit for.
/r/seduction02/05/17 07:20 PM
6

I just feel like it's difficult to sleep with her when she's not drinking. Once she even said I make her nervous when I was escalating things. I'm pretty jokey and light hearted with her so not sure where that came from. If she says you're making her nervous and you don't know why then you should realize that you don't actually have rapport and you're not being receptive to her non-verbal communication. If she's giving you reasons not to have sex and you're only really having sex when she's drun…
/r/seduction11/01/17 07:57 PM
2

The need for validation is rooted very deep, is often formed through childhood and your formative years and serves an evolutionary social function. It never goes away, you just have to learn to get your validation somewhere else. Self-validation techniques work if you practice them regularly. You're still young, so you'll find it comes naturally through life experience, through things that build your identity and self-confidence. Take part in social activities and volunteer
/r/seduction18/12/16 07:30 PM
1

I find if I go more than 3 days without contacting a girl, the likelihood of her flaking on the day of meeting her starts to climb. You gotta keep the embers warm.
/r/seduction30/11/16 03:00 AM
3

Sounds like approach anxiety, that's quite common when you're first starting. Have you read through some of the material on the side bar like these? https://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/fgq0a/approach_anxiety_is_a_symptom_of_extreme/?st=iw3rgu7k&sh=2ec85471 https://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ero8h/new_to_seddit_a_concise_guide_for_recovering_afcs/?st=iw3rjpr9&sh=367431c5 https://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ctoxh/new_to_seddit_check_here_first/?st=iw3rjqzr&sh=04a4a787 I re…
/r/seduction29/11/16 05:17 PM
2

Finally, I got the magical opportunity to be with her at a friends house. Now we're talking Just me, a few dudes, and her and a friend. Oh... I think we have differing opinions on what a magical opportunity is. I would just call that 'hanging out'. It's still an opportunity as her guy friends demonstrated, but I think you were building it up to be something it wasn't. It sounds like you set it up in your mind that this was your ticket to winning her over but you didn't consider that you might no…
/r/seduction16/10/16 06:23 PM
6

Being able to let go of past awkwardness is a good quality to have.
/r/seduction24/09/16 01:04 AM
11

I don't know if you're joking, but I honestly like this a lot better than the straight "Thanks" that a lot of people are saying, which is kind of flat, boring and kind of a conversation stopper.
/r/seduction11/09/16 03:19 PM
1

I just tell them I date other women concurrently as a matter of course and only see women who are ok with that. At first I was nervous that it would drive them away, but things are still going good. There is some jealousy between them, but otherwise being direct and honest has worked pretty well.
/r/seduction31/08/16 05:11 AM
5

It's funny how people are willing to bend their own rules when they see something they want and that's the only way to get it.
/r/seduction22/08/16 04:07 AM
2

Congratulations, you just had a perfectly normal first ever field experience. You went out, you made mistakes and gained some valuable first hand experience. No amount of sitting on your computer, reading PUA articles and discussing theory will ever substitute to what you just gained. A number of suggestions though: Whether you were just using a turn of phrase or not, you are unlikely you'll be picking up chicks right off the bat and expecting that at this stage will fuck up your game. It's impo…
/r/seduction30/07/16 06:35 PM
2

We have an excess of PUA methods, everyone and their dog is selling one now. Some are decent, most just copy what they learned from other's advice, some are fucking cringe inducing and some are just flat out terrible ideas. I'll never forget the one where the guy is harassing random women downtown, chasing them down the street trying to get kisses from girls who are obviously trying to create some distance from him. It made me so uncomfortable to watch because he outright ignored her obvious sig…
/r/seduction22/07/16 04:31 PM
20

That was a cannon volley of crazy
/r/seduction16/07/16 04:05 AM
1

If you want the context, you need to start from the beginning and get your house in order. We've all been there, we all failed and learned hard lessons. Now you know why you skipping steps doesn't work. Go back and re-read this: https://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ero8h/new_to_seddit_a_concise_guide_for_recovering_afcs/?st=iqlboyaf&sh=3eb1263c
/r/seduction13/07/16 08:13 PM
1

Your reputation will follow you for at least as long as you continue with the behavior that earned it. The thing with reputations is that it's basically society's take on how you interact, mirroring your actions. It sounds like you have a reputation for boldly hitting on anything with a pair of tits and then making it awkward for everyone involved. If it's got to the point that people are reporting you to administration for harassment, the writing on the wall reads "calm the fuck down". When we …
/r/seduction13/07/16 07:21 PM
1

I totally get how you feel, I started losing my hair when I was 19. I'm 35 now and I honestly like being bald now and I actually get compliments on it -- there are some bald-men aficionados out there. But back then I would even photoshop my hairline, I hated it so much. Every comment people made deflated my confidence. That's what people who've never lost their hair don't realize and no one tells you, it's like exactly like grieving. You even go through the 5 stages: Angry that you lost that gen…
/r/seduction13/07/16 05:54 PM
33

It's not bullshit, he's partially right. Most guys (myself included) have ruined their chances with a girl because they ended up building all the rapport over text; and when we do try to make plans, they suddenly become unavailable. If you're texting a girl back and forth like she's your girlfriend or spouse, it disincentives her to actually meet you in person. She can get all the emotional validation she needs just from her phone without risking any potential for an awkward social meeting in pe…
/r/seduction08/07/16 06:51 PM
1

Went through a few periods like that in my life. I don't remember staying motivated, each time I've been pretty freaking frustrated and found it really sapped my confidence and desire to keep going. A few times I've retreated into solitude to reflect and recover, sometimes days, weeks or months. I've just found I know too much now, I can't go back to being just an AFC so I just keep trying.
/r/seduction07/07/16 11:13 PM
5

I felt like she was trying to claim ownership of me by doing this, Your insight is correct, in a way she was claiming you. You were in a party with lots of other attractive girls, by having you hold her bag and drink she's signalling to the other girls that you have some kind of relationship. A woman doesn't let just any man watch her drink and bag -- a creep might do something to her drink or rummage through her stuff without her consent. That's a display of trust in a group setting where other…
/r/seduction06/07/16 05:46 PM
3

just like any "sale", you still have to let you intentions be known. So how do you tell a woman you would love to have sex with her? Breathing is a good way -- we're men, we like sex, it's not a secret. You wanting sex isn't the question on her mind; it's 'do I feel comfortable with this guy taking it to the next level?' There's a fine balance and it's really up to how she will interpret it. You can be talking at a bar/party with a woman and whisper "I would love to take you back with me so we c…
/r/seduction02/07/16 11:31 PM
4

Negging is a bit of a controversial topic because of how often novice PUA's get it wrong and it's caused a lot of backlash over the years. The idea of it is sound though; build them up and then cut them down a little to keep them on their toes. It isn't to put them down or invalidate them, it's just to keep them guessing on how you'll react. However, many a frustrated newbie has ended up crossing the line into verbal aggression, called it negging and done a disservice to this community. I find a…
/r/seduction02/07/16 08:24 PM
18

I'm in the same process myself. Dressing well, staying fit, eating healthy are all good for self-care but the power of sexual attraction is mostly mental. Most people who know me would call me a quiet, friendly guy that is intelligent, easy to get along with and likeable. Friendliness and likeability will build rapport, however that doesn't necessarily translate into sexual tension and if you want to get laid, that's what you need. Sexual tension comes from when there are barriers between us and…
/r/seduction02/07/16 07:48 PM
1

You've got it all wrong, that's an advantage. You've got something that other people can relate to. Everyone I know at some point has to struggle against their own body. You're hiding it like it's something to be ashamed of, but in reality it's something that other people could empathize with. Don't you know that chicks dig injuries? They love it when guys are ok with being vulnerable. If you already have value as you say, then you're worrying over nothing.
/r/seduction26/05/16 04:15 PM
2

Stop fussing over the minutiae, that kind of thinking will kill your mental game. It's common practice to touch base before you go out for plans. Just say, 'Good afternoon, looking forward to dancing tonight.'
/r/seduction04/05/16 06:09 PM
5

First of all, the post that you're regurgitating is a sweeping generalization about male/female relationships, so apply it to your life at your own folly. Women are just as capable of solving problems as men and men can be just as affirmation-seeking as women. I find that entire paradigm is ridiculous because it obscures the simple truth that women are just more inclined to talk about their problems than men.
/r/seduction04/05/16 05:35 PM
1

You're probably overthinking things, I tell people to text me to remind me of stuff all the time because I'm absent-minded and life is busy.
/r/seduction04/05/16 04:22 PM
2

There can be a lot of negativity here sometimes and pretty much all of it is related to frustration with women, so as a woman it probably feels somewhat hostile at times. I know it's easy to say, but it's just best not to take it personally. Most guys here are just working through shit and some of the struggles related to deeply set habits, pain and beliefs. It's not an attractive thing to see a guy melt down over rejection and many of us don't have people close enough that we can trust, so we c…
/r/seduction12/04/16 11:09 PM
1

My former partner taught me that more or less... throwing yourself into the conversation helps, or something to that effect. Seems to have worked for me at least, although I have occasionally had people tell me I'm too forward/bold for their liking (each to their own in all fairness, but maybe I wasn't told in the nicest of ways). Yeah, like swimming, you just gotta jump in feet first. You can only learn so much treading water in the shallow end. I've always treated people as people, but I often…
/r/seduction12/04/16 10:36 PM
7

I'm not speaking for all women, but I am at least drawing off my personal experiences and their experiences as well. Approaching 'blind' (i.e. in the street) gives you no idea of what the person is like at all. Whereas approaching via a club, gym, interest-based society etc at least gives you an idea of what the person likes to build conversation off. For example, LARPing or maybe a book club. That gives you -something- to work off. It helps having something obvious in common when you're first m…
/r/seduction12/04/16 08:05 PM
3

Ideally, you would do that before the kiss. By doing it afterwards, it's a bit of gamble to then try and change her expectations and still keep her interested. Otherwise you end up in your situation now, trying to pick words and timing and that's a bullshit task. That's how every awkward conversation starts. Do you want to have that conversation? I know I don't. I mean, honestly the best way to inform a girl that you intend to keep a relationship casual is to keep it casual. Your tone, body lang…
/r/seduction30/03/16 03:05 PM
1

Take her for a polar bear swim. Then come back and tell us all the details.
/r/seduction03/03/16 02:45 AM
1

Nice humblebrag
/r/seduction02/03/16 01:55 PM
6

Yep, I get that sometimes too. Subconsciously, all you really want to know is that you're good enough to be accepted. Once you have proof, your brain stops looking. You're not really losing interest in the girl, you're feeling relief from the tension of believing that you're weren't acceptable. It's not uncommon, people of both genders and all ages experience it.
/r/seduction01/03/16 06:53 PM
3

It could be that the reason you're bored while talking to people is because you're making boring conversation. If you're going to have a conversation like you're conducting a job interview, you're not going to build rapport. If you ask fact-oriented questions, you're going to get fact-oriented answers. If you ask personal questions, you're going to get personal answers. You want her to reach topics that are of emotional importance to her. And yes, you shouldn't just be asking questions. Many guy…
/r/seduction01/03/16 09:23 AM
15

I took it to mean with everyone because it's not something you practice in a set, but something to internalize. It's about being okay with being vulnerable.
/r/seduction23/02/16 07:54 PM
2

Congrats on the new relationship. Come back again.
/r/seduction22/02/16 04:21 AM
2

I got some of the best advice about how to pickup gals from other gals. Then you're the exception, not the rule. You just need to actively listen and think both about the surface message as well as underlying processes. It is important to listen, that's exactly how I came to realize that it's a better idea to heed advice from other men more than women on dating. When you listen to women, generally they'll give you the advice that's best worked for them. The problem is that gender roles still exi…
/r/seduction10/02/16 06:38 PM
14

You're confusing "Don't take advice from women on dating" with "Don't listen to women". It's not even about not taking advice from women, but specifically about advice from women on getting women.
/r/seduction10/02/16 03:46 AM
3

the fleas are the least of his worries
/r/seduction30/01/16 01:38 AM
5

The uber driver says right when she leaves that I could have got her number, but I guess I'm afraid that she's just talking to me just because I'm good at being a nice guy....and asking for the number changes that and makes me a little threatening....blahhh! I hate this. If it helps, you're wrong, it doesn't make you threatening, it makes you self-conscious. And you're only self-conscious because you lack experience. I know this because anyone who has asked for a girls number knows that it's not…
/r/seduction28/01/16 06:07 PM
1

I just have my own system and I adapt it by what I try and learn. For me, being direct has more advantages than being indirect. And it forces me out of my comfort zone to engage.
/r/seduction23/01/16 06:27 PM
3

I have to disagree that her knowing you're interested in her is a misstep. I think more accurately, you don't want to be just another one of her admirers, complimenting her looks to get attention from her. If you want to sleep with her you need to show interest. I find giving her a genuine compliment early can be advantageous; it informs the conversation that you're a potential love interest. The point I think you want to make is if you start gushing over her before she's invested enough, the na…
/r/seduction22/01/16 05:15 PM
5

“I don’t want you to have the wrong expectations,” I say this to my clients when I have no clue how long a project will take or how much work it is. It's a good non-committal answer. “I’m unpredictable, I go where my whims take me,” She has no idea who she'll see next. It might be you, it might be someone else. I’m not going anywhere. The ball is in your court. She's purposefully giving you road blocks and then says it's your call. Seems like she doesn't want you in any romantic way, but she sti…
/r/seduction14/01/16 07:28 PM
1

I believe the exchange is 1.7 schmeckles for 1 kapoodle
/r/seduction14/01/16 07:07 PM
2

Why do you think that is?
/r/seduction07/01/16 05:37 AM
2

The #1 way to be creepy is to try not to be creepy. Instead, try just talking to people, men and women, with no objective or agenda until that feels normal and natural.
/r/seduction05/01/16 07:58 PM
92

Teach her what lesson, exactly? If it's just for not showing interest to you, it makes you look worse than her. I thought this sub was about teaching people to handle with rejection with class, not punish others for it. If all you want is vindication, just call her out on it. When the topic comes up, put her on the ropes and let her work her way out of it. "You didn't seem very interested in me when we met." "Yeah, I was interested before but you seemed more interested in my friend." "You weren'…
/r/seduction22/12/15 03:37 AM
4

That's pretty natural. You're shifting from thesis to antithesis, the tendency is always to go too far in the other direction. Nothing to fret about. It's just human nature and the pendulum always swings back.
/r/seduction21/12/15 10:53 PM
4

Stop being a coward. You've already done the deed, so own it and whatever consequences may come. It's the only way you'll ever respect yourself.
/r/seduction21/12/15 05:10 PM
2

Not kidding. You're not the first. Everyone reacts a little differently, but in the end, people don't really care about your faults as much as you do.
/r/seduction21/12/15 04:56 PM
2

What do you want me to say? "Oh I never had a girlfriend in my life before, I have only had sex with prostitutes" Actually, yes. I think you should. Own it, man. You clearly have some self-worth issues you need to sort out and even if you try to hide it, it will still seep out during any interaction with a girl. They'll read your uneasiness and over eagerness and it will repel them unless you own it. If you own it, it can't be used against you. If you were hoping to show yourself to be some sham…
/r/seduction21/12/15 04:34 PM
-14

They owe him the respect as a human being to be polite. No they don't. Unless you're royalty or a dictator, no one is obligated to behave in any way towards you. In fact, the best advice I can give you is to stop thinking the world owes you anything, because it doesn't. Edit: Hah, fuckers, truth hurts doesn't it? No one owes you shit. Get used to it.
/r/seduction18/12/15 06:56 PM
1

"No worries, ttyl" Shit, I tell my girlfriend that all the time and she reacts the same way. Sometimes I just want to chill by myself.
/r/seduction10/12/15 07:58 PM
1

To try and remove some of her power. I know why you did this, I've been there too, but you chose the worst way to respond. That's why I'm not a big fan of the "if she doesn't want you right now, the fuck her" school of thought that dominates this sub. So many situations are recoverable but people lack the mental and emotional toughness you need to make short term hookups successfully. Girls will stay with guys who fuck up and screw them over because they don't waiver and crumble in the face of a…
/r/seduction10/12/15 05:29 PM
1

Sorry man, but that's how it goes sometimes. Just adding my 2 cents, adding urgency to the plan backfires more often than not. You just have to chill and keep rolling. If you're chill about it, who knows? You still might get a late night text when she's out with her friends. Or invite them over. You always have options
/r/seduction10/12/15 04:51 PM
1

Most guys walk away because once they lose face, they lose their power and self confidence. If that's not a problem for you and you want to be friends with her, do as you please. People take advice off the internet way too seriously. People refer constantly to systems and methods because so many guys are clueless when it comes to women and relationships. They'll say walk away from girls who reject your advances because women are a lot more fickle and trying to convince them after they've already…
/r/seduction01/12/15 08:09 AM
1

Sounds like you two have a rapport already. Have you tried actually making a move?
/r/seduction30/11/15 07:19 PM
2

It's ok, even the most experienced of us will still mess up, the key is how you respond to it. Just one more question: Now she knows quit alot about me and I about her. Some things we have in common and other things we don't. How should I proceed now? Is it over? Did my mistake kinda kill it or ... ? Remember what I said about letting things play with your head? The only thing that's over is yesterday. Life always goes on. So even moment by moment, you can start things over right here, right now…
/r/seduction03/09/15 02:24 AM
1

how should I've dealt with this cuz she asked 90% of all the questions. She started with 'where are you from?', 'what's your religion?' etc even the marriage thing was her question. The only question I asked ( and I didn't do it with every question, since some of them didn't interest me) was 'what about you?'. What should I've done differently, just not answering them? Ok, thanks for clarifying that point. I was thinking you brought up the subject and she's the one put you in your place. My bad,…
/r/seduction02/09/15 09:26 PM
3

Ok, let met first talk about religion. Yes, people are often willing to overlook incompatible religious beliefs if they don't think the relationship will go anywhere. But if you're talking marriage, it is often a deal breaker and rightly so. I'm agnostic myself, so I understand if it's not a big deal to you. But I've been with enough people to know that religious beliefs often are inseparable from a persons own core beliefs. People take that shit seriously and if you downplay or dismiss it, they…
/r/seduction02/09/15 11:42 AM
1

Yes, move on. That's a clear of a signal as you can get.
/r/seduction07/08/15 02:07 AM
1

Sounds like playful teasing to me.
/r/seduction31/03/15 06:00 PM
36

I'm going to play devil's advocate. Sounds like you're forcing things too much. She didn't want to date you but you wouldn't back down. You reached for her hand, she said no. You then went for a kiss (why would you kiss her when she wouldn't even accept holding hands?) and she said no. People on this sub get a little too focused on the acts of escalation and forget that you need to build rapport with the girl first. She has to consent or escalate each time otherwise you're just being a pushy cre…
/r/seduction16/02/15 10:54 PM
1

Extending a handshake first is a pretty obvious sign of what she's thinking going into it. She just wasn't receptive, it happens all the time. You can talk to her, see what was off and try again later, or just leave it. It's not that big of a deal and the more you date, the more you're going to have similar experiences. You just gotta keep rolling.
/r/seduction07/02/15 12:15 AM
2

That's true, but not exactly my point. I was talking about inner game. If you don't think something is weird, some people still might but others won't care. But if you think something is weird, then it's going to come across as weird.
/r/seduction03/02/15 06:14 AM
1

You don't think so, it might not be. If you do, it will.
/r/seduction02/02/15 10:26 PM
1

I thought about this for a bit and there is one other possible explanation: The Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon The more you learn about body language the more you begin to notice these behaviors. It might be that it's happening no more than usual but you're now more aware of it, thus you're noticing it more often.
/r/seduction24/01/15 10:08 PM
1

Sounds like I don't need to tell you on how much communication is non-verbal then. I have a few thoughts on this: That's a typical response to someone who feels exposed, vulnerable, judged or uncomfortable. That's a typical response to someone who is closed off or disagreeable. There are also atypical reasons for that response such as habit or anxiety. For some, even the energy a man brings into the room will make some women go "No, I'm not in the mood". The first two are in response to you and …
/r/seduction24/01/15 05:29 PM
1

You told us about your appearance, but what was your body language when you noticed theirs?
/r/seduction23/01/15 11:20 PM
2

I agree. Personal taste is arbitrary anyway. Just because most girls don't find your humor palatable, there are others that will. Just keep going until you find them.
/r/seduction23/01/15 05:16 AM
11

At 33 they still love to text, but that doesn't mean you should. It's one of the most counter-productive ways to standing out among the crowd. At any given time, most single women are texting anywhere from 5 to 10 different guys. Some even more. That's why most experienced guys will tell you the texting game is a dead end. It's easy to understand why women love to text. Women constantly crave the emotional high of being desired and texting is a great way to get a quick fix. It's a safe, easy way…
/r/seduction26/09/14 08:01 PM
1

Does she really or is she just saying she has a boyfriend because she's not interested? Either way, why would you want to be 'that guy'? There always a lineup of creepers waiting to cut a man's grass while he's away. I used to chase guys like you away on a weekly basis. Fucking annoying, it was. I've heard all the justifications people come up with, but it goes against my core beliefs. Why would you want to be the kind of guy that has to fly under the radar? Seduction isn't about tricking women …
/r/seduction08/09/14 06:20 PM
1

Hey fellow gaps tron a u tag (my phone autocorrected fapstronaut and it was too weird to change it), at 16 everyone expects you to be awkward. It's the single most awkward time of your life and the one time in your life that makes it okay. Be one with the awkwardness. The more cool you are with it, the less you notice it. That's what being smooth is, being at ease with yourself.
/r/seduction31/08/14 05:48 AM
2

You're probably checked out more than you realize. Women are naturally better at using their peripheral vision than men and are not as obvious when doing it.
/r/seduction28/08/14 11:21 PM
18

First, congrats on losing that much weight, that's remarkable. I need to say something though because I think there's something else you should consider. From one man to another, it's important to know where your power comes from. It's a common mistake to believe your looks are really important when in reality it's less important than how your looks make you view and treat yourself. Given how you've ascribed your success to losing all that weight, I imagine you felt that was the thing holding yo…
/r/seduction28/08/14 08:01 PM
1

Change the topic. It's really that simple. If she starts up again, change it to something else right back.
/r/seduction27/04/14 10:33 PM
2

There's a lot of venting disguised as advice going on in this thread, so please take them with a grain of salt. I'd like to help you though because it sounds like you are putting in an honest effort to relate to women better and I always want to see the hardest workers succeed. First, when a woman says you're being creepy it's because the interest level between the two of you is very unbalanced. Some people say you have to be less committed than her, but I think that's misleading. It just has to…
/r/seduction24/04/14 08:03 PM
4

Damn, I want that chutzpah.
/r/seduction18/02/14 11:49 PM
2

You're confusing a principle with advice. What you should have said is, "We're adults, if we know what to do, then we should do it. If we don't know, then we find out and then do it." Doing things without being asked is great, if they are what is needed/wanted. Hence that's why it's not always bad to ask.
/r/seduction14/02/14 09:21 PM
-6

Yeah, it kinda does matter. None of that would have happened if he didn't escalate to physical contact. They were already disengaging from him and he pursued. That wasn't even a rookie mistake, it was just him being stupid. The moment he shoved one of them, the outcome was obvious. The fact that they were armed actually makes me think things went more fortunately for him than it could have gone.
/r/PussyPass12/02/14 03:21 AM
3

Don't fear failure, embrace it. It's the most valuable tool you could ever gain for getting everything you ever wanted. You have to fail a lot first so you'd best get started. Most men don't fail, they simply don't act. I'm probably a bit older than you so I'll say from my life so far that it's not failure you should fear, but regret. Regret is what will kill your soul, not being called a creep or an asshole.
/r/seduction04/02/14 07:10 AM
26

I really liked how you linked repetition with confidence because that's how I acquired skill in everything I'm good at today. Fear of the shame in getting caught being a player has definitely been true in my case. I'm going to try this later and see if I can refine only one approach instead of a different one each time. Thank you for contributing this post.
/r/seduction21/12/13 04:33 PM
2

Humor has a lot of benefits but excessive joking has some downsides. Think about the energy level you have when you're joking around with friends. It's like going to a dance and playing a top 40 song that gets people loosened up and dancing. It's a great way to start rapport but it's only one aspect of the attraction you want to build. What you want is to keep changing the tempo up and down as you work towards the slow, intimate dancing. That's the opportune time to make a move. I've heard it de…
/r/seduction26/11/13 05:11 AM
4

Dude, this is hardcore douchebag behavior. Seriously, don't do this again. First of all, it's dishonest. You're not going to date any of those women because you started off by lying to them about who you are and what your intentions are. Second, it's very selfish and exploitative. I saw a video of a guy who called a real estate agent and pretended to be a potential buyer so he could practice gaming her. It was a step-by-step guide of how to be a self-serving asshole and that's almost exactly wha…
/r/seduction26/10/13 04:52 AM
3

If I could refine that idea a bit further, it's less about what women want and more about what they respond to. All women want to be treated well and most men like to treat women well but the ones who take control of the situation are the ones who are more likely to be rewarded for it.
/r/seduction12/09/13 11:36 PM
18

From my experience, I tend to get excuses when I'm asking instead of inviting.
/r/seduction25/08/13 05:24 PM
2

This is good life advice, not just for dealing with women. It's amazing how much /r/seduction seems to translate into other areas of my life.
/r/seduction23/08/13 06:13 PM
1

I have to agree. If someone extends an olive branch and you look down them for it then you run the risk of looking selfish to the group.
/r/seduction02/08/13 07:45 PM
2

I love the idea, but I still got a ways to go before I'm ready for that kind of game. I get green around the gills when I see some guys pull that off. I want that.
/r/seduction29/07/13 08:09 AM
5

Tell him. Chances are he already knows anyway and if you approach him first, you get to frame it in a better light. Having the balls to come and tell him will make him less likely to blame you and more likely to blame himself for letting the events unfold in the way they did. Which he should and just chalk it up to lesson learned and if you want to be a bro, then help him get back up on his feet and try again. There is more than one woman on this earth. She's already chosen you over him and it's…
/r/seduction28/07/13 07:37 PM
8

He brought a girl to a party where she knew no one, got drunk, passed out without making sure she got home safely and you're worried you might ruin his chances with this girl?
/r/seduction28/07/13 06:36 PM
3

This sounds spot on. I'm going to try this later.
/r/seduction20/06/13 03:12 PM
2

Serious question, would that then also apply to bisexual women?
/r/seduction15/03/13 07:33 AM
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