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somewhatbitter Archive

View 3 posts and 25 comments by somewhatbitter on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Being friends -- or even new lovers -- won't tell you what the woman is really like. You'll only be seeing her on her best behavior. What's she like when life gets tough? Who knows. I'm sure the girl he was dating 10 years ago also seemed great at the time (before she cheated and claimed HateHateHateHer was the father).
/r/MensRights10/06/11 03:06 PM
1

Are you dealing with a divorce? I am not at the moment. I'm desperately trying to avoid it. In another thread I asked about avoiding negative feelings after divorce and child custody battles. I haven't been through those, but am going through something similar. That said, if I'm unable to make the marriage work, I want to know how the kids' preferences affect my chances at custody.
/r/MensRights02/06/11 01:05 AM
2

18?! Anyone know of a state-by-state listing? Is there a legal term for "a child choosing which parent they'd like to have custody"?
/r/MensRights01/06/11 08:38 PM
1

Lesson learned. Thanks.
/r/MensRights01/06/11 07:34 PM
1

I kicked her out So glad to hear that she left! Great. Wow. I could imagine it going they way of, "I'm not going anywhere, f--- you, this is my home, you get out, blah blah blah, [door slam], etc, etc.". I believe my third lawyer was key in my winning as well because she was a straight up bitch to everyone but me, and seemed to have a lot of knowledge of court personnel and legal strategies. A female lawyer. Interesting that you were able to turn some bitchiness there to your (and your kids') fa…
/r/MensRights01/06/11 07:25 PM
1

So glad to hear that she agreed to using the family psychologist. Good for you.
/r/MensRights01/06/11 07:20 PM
1

I swap emails with them If you continue to keep in touch, as they mature, they may slowly begin to perceive more and more about what's really going on, what horrible lies they've been told by their mother, and what truly awful things their mother has done. It won't repair the damage, but maybe down the road you and your kids can help eachother pick up the pieces.
/r/MensRights01/06/11 07:14 PM
1

How did you manage to get 50/50?
/r/MensRights01/06/11 06:32 AM
1

We were married 20 years. My lawyer said that for all practical purposes, I should assume that I will pay alimony "forever." I know a divorced 50-year-old feminist who is confident that the alimony will keep coming until one of them is dead.
/r/MensRights01/06/11 06:27 AM
1

So very sorry that this happened to you. I left. Are you still paying child support? If not, I've read that fathers are arrested for this. Have you been or are you concerned about arrest and jail time? It's been 2 years since I've seen my kids. Devastating. Are you able to keep in any sort of contact with them? Phone? Email? Text? Stopping by their school to say hi? Good luck and stay strong.
/r/MensRights01/06/11 06:18 AM
1

Are these payments that are adding up for child support, alimony, or both? Any idea if the child support "debt" is forgiven after the children turn 18?
/r/MensRights01/06/11 06:03 AM
1

How did you get custody?
/r/MensRights01/06/11 05:22 AM
2

If Ed is in jail, then he has no income, correct? Thus, Clara loses her cash cow, correct?
/r/MensRights01/06/11 04:26 AM
1

What is your "Scorched Earth Policy"?
/r/MensRights01/06/11 04:24 AM
1

In Sweden, for instance, [...] shared custody is the norm, in law and (pretty much) in practice. Are the fathers still forced pay child support?
/r/MensRights01/06/11 03:54 AM
1

She starts to see everything you do to make her life easier as you trying to encourage her dependence so she can't get out from under your thumb. Interesting. Hadn't thought of that. Perhaps gently encouraging more independence would be advised. Does that make any sense? I hope I managed to explain it clearly--it's complicated. Yes, thanks.
/r/MensRights01/06/11 03:43 AM
1

Very wise, bitter_old_man. The younger audience here may not get what you're talking about. Thanks for sharing.
/r/MensRights01/06/11 03:33 AM
1

Can you please define this term "agency"? I've never seen it used the way you're using it.
/r/MensRights27/05/11 03:36 AM
2

What you say makes a lot of sense. One minor issue that stood out to me though: Actually, I've found that people don't change much. ... I have noticed in many men and women that their sexual attraction is often in regard to traits ... With men, it's often entitlement (which manifests as neediness), frailty Early in the relationship/marriage: "he takes care of me!" Later: "he's controlling me!" That one's a mystery to me. Doubly so if you're correct that people generally don't change much. BTW, w…
/r/MensRights27/05/11 03:30 AM
1

You think an SO is the only person that can be very close to you and betray you or that someone that's not a close associate can't fuck your life over just as bad? I've read stories here and elsewhere about wives divorcing, taking custody of very young children, and then telling lies and turning the kids against Dad. I don't think there's any worse pain a loving Dad can feel than that. It's orders of magnitude worse than a simple betrayal (a spouse cheating and leaving).
/r/MensRights27/05/11 03:15 AM
1

Thanks for the insights, though I'm not sure I see how objectifying women leads to them believing they're no longer their own guiding force in their life. I don't see the connection there. Women objectify men similarly: "he's a means of support; a provider" (analogous to what men do: "she's a sex object"). But do men then "de-agentify" (as you put it) themselves? No.
/r/MensRights27/05/11 03:11 AM
1

Excellent post, thank you. You might want to think about why you chose the woman you did. Unfortunately, even if a man makes his choice for all the right reasons, it seems to me that still the women may, over time, change for the worse and then make decisions that cause much damage to her spouse and even their kids.
/r/MensRights26/05/11 06:02 AM
4

Best thing you can do is figure out what feelings she (your ex) evoked in you Interesting exercise. Especially when asking someone who's been through all kinds of pain since the initially happy relationship began. Then try to be conscious next time, and weigh things like, "Can we discuss our problems without fighting, do I love her company even when we're not naked, will her intellect keep me interested, do we have many interests in common, and is she sane?" So suppose a man can answer all those…
/r/MensRights26/05/11 05:43 AM
3

I'm pretty familiar with research on personality, and personality really doesn't change. What I see: Women + having children + unprepared/unable to handle parenting --> stress & blame --> change. are you sure she did [changed]? I think lots of men here can attest that the woman they divorced was not the same woman they married. Though, if you're correct (that personality doesn't change), then perhaps what one might perceive as personality change might be mental illness that simply surfaced due t…
/r/MensRights26/05/11 05:16 AM
3

I think you're implying that one's judgement will be much better the second time around. I agree. But does it even matter? I've found that people change, and if you're a man it's easy to find yourself being put through the meat grinder when your woman changes for the worse. And I'm not sure any amount of good judgement can predict whether a person will change (and if so, whether it will be for the worse).
/r/MensRights26/05/11 04:27 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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