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speckledpill Archive

View 1 posts and 76 comments by speckledpill on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

speckledpill/r/ExRedPill14/08/17 05:20 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

Could be a psychology element to it - especially for guys who were push overs, and want someone to blame. A series of failed tests could make it feel like someone else manipulated them, and they have to manipulate back. I don't think all guys should "just lift", but I do like the idea of a guy frustrated with dating taking a break and working on themselves. I don't like the way it's done, but I at least see the value in gaining a hobby like weightlifting that also improves fitness.
/r/ExRedPill15/08/17 03:34 PM
1

Not everything is helping each other. Maybe the other person feels more comfortable with sharing or certain behaviors, and you're not as comfortable. So what is a boundary for one person isn't for the other. Doesn't have to be intentional - can just be different tolerances. I suppose the "pushing boundaries" becomes useful if it's all in one direction. Like your "help you, help me" example - it shouldn't be just "help you help you" - which could hint at being a push over.
/r/ExRedPill15/08/17 03:18 PM
1

If you offer valid reasons to dispute rather than give in to her, then she might think you're a pushover. I'm confused by this wording. In your view, a dispute with valid reasons makes this man seem like a push over? I think /u/AnarchyshitpostBOT has an even better description than "shit tests": pushing boundaries. Being easy going is fine, but if that boundary fence keeps getting moved - it eventually gets pushed over.
/r/ExRedPill15/08/17 02:23 AM
1

I don't think the extreme is that interesting - if someone constantly tests someone else, if they are pushy or psycho there's no need to make fine distinctions about shit tests. Maybe in TRP that's normal, but it strikes me also as a bit psycho. Testing of boundaries, as you said, is actually a better description of the dynamic. And that hints at a level of immaturity, as well - testing boundaries for their own sake is pushy. But if done occasionally, it could just be the normal give and take be…
/r/ExRedPill15/08/17 02:19 AM
1

That's an interesting take: being a push over as the underlying problem, and that being bossed around a bit (the "shit test") could just reveal it. So a guy noticing these tests might note if they show him to be a push over - if he isn't making requests, and is always agreeing to his significant other's requests.
/r/ExRedPill14/08/17 06:07 PM
2

Getting Married to a Conversation Topic This is much more interesting than most guys realize. Guys can talk sports for 2 hours, and have that be normal. Typically most women (not all) do not do this - they change topics more often than men do. So keep that in mind - a woman will be more comfortable if you don't stay on the same topic so long. But - that also requires having a lot of topics, maybe some creativity, and confidence. If you can talk about whatever, and smoothly change topics, you're …
/r/seduction11/07/17 09:25 AM
4

My point is to counter balance shaming with its significance. Someone says long hair is a shallow attribute, I can argue against their opinion. I can say long hair takes months of healthy eating and protecting that hair to keep it healthy - and that's why men can be attracted to long hair. They need a mate that will be healthy for enough months to bear a child. So given that context, long hair doesn't seem so shallow. That was my point.
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 09:28 AM
3

Even though it adds depth to the appreciation of long hair?
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 03:01 AM
2

Didn't some of those traits improve the chance of offspring surviving in our ancestors? Like in ancient times, if you weren't consistently healthy that showed up in long hair. By pointing out the importance of these traits to ancestors, maybe the shaming can be diminished.
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/17 05:26 PM
2

You could setup boundaries to make things more comfortable for you, and possibly make yourself not as useful as a friend to her. A boundary might be not gossiping about other people - "I don't want to hear about other people", for example. Instead of cutting out the friendship at once, you put boundaries up against the things which make you uncomfortable. This also helps in another way - when she violates those boundaries, you can remind her you don't want to gossip. And then you can use that as…
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/17 05:18 PM
2

when I was younger it was always me being the needy guy begging for second dates. Now it's the other way round Why don't you warn them ala Taio Cruz... You're a heart breaker and you're only going to break their heart? Maybe by warning them, you'll feel they are better prepared and you can see if it helps your emotions (or theirs).
/r/seduction12/06/17 06:03 PM
4

Reminds me of a friend of mine who always managed to end up sitting next to me in group meals. I mean I get the signal, and there were others, but sometimes it's the guy who wants things in the friend zone.
/r/seduction12/06/17 05:58 PM
1

I start my flirting with just some humor and trying to talk about subjects in a playful manner. If I don't get a laugh or smile, and they won't pick up a topic, I take those as signs they have zero interest in flirting. Maybe if you're more aware of attempts at humor, and amusing topics, you can try to be open to that.
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/17 01:42 PM
1

If it's in a library, you might flip towards the last few chapters and see some of the stuff on sex and boundaries. Some ideas were interesting, like without guilt and fear what would you do (in terms of dating or sex). In a way, the book asks the reader to push their own boundaries - and push back on other people's boundaries. For the "Nice Guy" types that's a good idea for recovering from being trampled on. What if there were fewer examples, but they covered individuals in more detail? That mi…
/r/seduction08/06/17 02:23 PM
1

Thanks for the detailed reply, I see what you mean - although I don't think the guys actually hugged in those contexts. I took it to mean guys were crying in frustration with how their life was going. Often the guys were being treated badly or suffering through a relationship. They know it's not working, and they don't know what to do. Some of "No More Mr Nice Guy" has too many generalizations. Like anyone who ever had their mother leave their side for a moment has abandonment issues. Really? Si…
/r/seduction08/06/17 01:53 AM
0

Yes, there's definitely a "mommy issues" aspect to the book. I think you're exaggerating how often "crying and guys hugging" came up in the book.
/r/seduction08/06/17 01:30 AM
10

There's a book "No More Mr Nice Guy" that probably explains it most completely, and especially where to go from there. A guy who expects being nice will be rewarded with a relationship.
/r/seduction07/06/17 01:26 PM
3

I'd recommend the book "Hello Darkness My Old Friend" (a used copy - really expensive new!) regarding turning anger into something more constructive. https://www.amazon.com/Hello-Darkness-Old-Friend-Embracing/dp/1401086039/ You might also try this line of reasoning: When he's not angry, ask him how often he's right. Is it 100%? Could he be right 95% of the time? If he's wrong 5% of the time, he should remember that when he gets angry he's got a 5% chance he's wrong. Intense anger, I think, comes…
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/17 03:59 PM
2

The quiet, shy IT guy at work that I talk to in the kitchen? Completely iced out. Some guys only realize you were hitting on them weeks later, sadly. It might work better to give him your number and tell him he should ask you out sometime. Then when he lets the situation slip to one of his friends, they can hit him upside the head and tell him to call you. Just realize all rejections aren't created equal. Some guys can be intimidated or worry you're messing with them, others can be in a relation…
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/17 03:51 PM
1

I was extremely lazy. What if you set a goal to cook for yourself a bit more each week? And then another goal of cooking for some friends. That might help you overcome laziness, feeling entitled (cooking for others), and also build your confidence and hobbies back up a little. But either way keep up with the therapist and hope you find your way again.
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/17 07:13 AM
0

I suspect the problem is more your presentation, and that's a lot easier to fix than having nothing to talk about. So just practice how you talk about it. You might make an effort to avoid verbs like "is", "has", "to be" and see if you can come up with more active descriptions. It's also okay to exaggerate a little to bring out what's exciting about a story. Work back from the interesting stuff, and figure out the story based on where you want it to wind up. And try not to just make long lists..…
/r/seduction01/06/17 06:59 AM
2

My brain being what it is, I thought "Hot Blonde" but the term actually refers to "Hot Babe". But the acronym doesn't really fit most of the numbers it's used with... "HB5" generally means someone average looking... "Hot Babe 5" is a bit of a contradiction when you expand it out.
/r/seduction01/06/17 04:02 AM
1

Maybe needs more time to be proven, but I'm not familiar enough with it. By my criteria, I should ask if there's a book on Amazon that covers it.
/r/seduction31/05/17 05:08 PM
2

Can you provide your boyfriend both sides of you, rather than just vulnerable (clingy/needy) or just independent (early relationship, and late relationship wall)?
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/17 05:01 PM
3

A lot of people seem to trace their awareness of pickup back to "The Game", so add Neil Strauss to that list. By now those techniques are considered outdated, but it's still the basic introduction and where it started. But a lot of guys have problems that are well described in "No More Mr Nice Guy". I suspect that book has helped train a lot of people to be better at seduction. So without caring about Robert Glover's record in pickup, maybe his contribution to getting the "NiceGuy" to overcome t…
/r/seduction31/05/17 04:19 PM
1

If you invite him, he'll just take that as the class going to lunch. You'll seem like the class leader, but it won't seem like a date to him. How long until your next class with a different teacher? Waiting until you're no longer his student is a better idea.
/r/seduction31/05/17 12:12 AM
1

There's enough single hot women walking around ... OP is a woman looking for men.
/r/seduction31/05/17 12:10 AM
3

She had choices and picked someone else - realize that just happens. I've been on both sides of it, and if you think back - you didn't know if you should go along with it. You were uncertain, and she jumped ahead of you in the relationship. It's confusing because she didn't even ask you out or anything, she just started hitting on you. You might have asked "You going to ask me out?" Which could either be for a date (less likely) or going back to her place (more likely). Not sure she was acting l…
/r/seduction29/05/17 01:21 PM
5

Something that helped me was "friend zoning" and realizing what I didn't know. For example, if you think she's sweet, keep in mind you only saw her a couple hours. Does she act sweet the rest of the time? How does she treat her friends? You have no idea - you think she's a certain way, but you just don't know. Keep that in mind - you are certain how great she is, but you really don't know.
/r/seduction29/05/17 01:14 PM
3

And? You have a title with no text or link explaining yourself 6 hours after your post.
/r/seduction29/05/17 01:11 PM
1

Did you rule out online dating? You might check for sites specific to what you're interested in. Or limit ages of women to what interests you.
/r/seduction29/05/17 01:10 PM
3

I also saw the study mentioning 3-4 partners for women and 6-7 partners for men, and at best you need to assume both sides are lying but in opposite directions. The study quoted same gender sex as too small a factor (11% for women, 6% for men) to account for the difference. So you might just say '5 partners' for both. I also recall the study used old data (2002?) and included age ranges of 15-45, which seems a bit young to represent "lifetime" partner counts. So take the numbers with some skepti…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/17 04:52 PM
1

If I described your relationship as dating and seeing other people in the beginning, but quickly dropping others and seeing only each other (exclusively), would that be accurate? Your comments suggest that's true, so maybe you were a "plate" in name only. Maybe it's closer to any couple that dates and then decides to pick one person to start a relationship. Does that make sense?
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 03:51 PM
1

"You two should work that out."
/r/TheRedPill27/05/17 10:15 AM
2

What about "multiple friends with benefits" as an end goal? Instead of just sharing a bed and nothing more, you spend time together and even sleep together. But you don't have jealousy or intertwined lives. Maybe I'm just giving a term to your new idea, and it's the same as what you call "smart-casual".
/r/seduction26/05/17 05:11 PM
3

Is there anything recent that interests you, that is widely known? Maybe something you know about something nearby? Draw from things in your recent past or nearby environment and see if that helps.
/r/seduction26/05/17 05:01 PM
2

Yes, but... I'm rather good at flirting, and I draw it out over days or weeks. It helps to be good looking, but flirting also acts as a halfway step between joking and dating. With flirting you can sense if things are getting more interesting or going nowhere. So yes, a number of women have asked me out - but did a number of women make "the first move"? Not if you include me starting to flirt with them. Or increasing the flirting, or keeping it going for a long time. I highly recommend flirting …
/r/seduction26/05/17 04:58 PM
1

Here's the link I followed, per OP's linked article: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/ad/ad362.pdf Published 2005, explicitly mentions 2002 in the title. If you have a report with 2013 data, a link would be great.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/17 12:59 PM
1

That data comes from a report with a long title that includes "Men and Women 15–44 Years of Age, United States, 2002". Any changes in the past 15 years are not reflected in this data, and the data itself shows an upward trend over time. So it's important to give additional room, like the poster who doubled the number of partners, to reflect uncertainty since this data was collected.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/17 07:36 AM
1

I asked about dominent/submissive over in RedPillWomen, and was told it's not about micro-managing. It's not about "control" of everything the woman does, but rather that decisions rest with one person. So a woman might actually decide something in her area of expertise (pick her own clothes), but defer to her man in most areas. She still gets input, but he makes the final call. Maybe that adds some nuance, that it's not just micro-managing and control.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/17 02:30 PM
1

Sounds like someone needs to make estimates of what "moderate" and "other" can be broken down into, and make the next survey more finely distinguish people's views.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/17 02:10 PM
1

Hot women are always in demand But less approached tho least in person. Maybe with the caveat "except for online dating"? It's my impression on Tinder very attractive girls receive a flood of messages.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/17 10:14 AM
1

It might be too late, but try to pass this off as not a big deal. The mature handling of it is the best way to leave things after she made her choice. You really need to think about her flaws more, so you can imagine her as just a friend. I don't want to this anymore but my mind constantly slips to her and I ended up doing something. Is this poorly worded, or is there something you wanted to say about what you did? You did something, or you want to end up doing something?
/r/seduction23/05/17 09:46 AM
1

For those who started on porn very young, "Your Brain On Porn" is a good wake up call as to what can happen. Read it before life gets too depressing - your doctor probably won't conclude that porn use is the root of any problem. your biology is wired to crave more extreme forms as time progresses That's a good warning, but it's not biological. For some reason I'm wired to get bored of porn before trying too much of it. So I don't believe everyone gets addicted to porn solely from the passage of …
/r/TheRedPill22/05/17 03:01 PM
3

Before setting up a process, what types of programming projects related to Red Pill have been proposed or completed? And what about finding volunteers for various projects instead of funding them?
/r/TheRedPill22/05/17 02:54 PM
1

Not sure that "chaste until marriage" makes sense for a forum on seduction. I think you're just describing people who are not a match for those in this forum.
/r/seduction22/05/17 10:19 AM
1

I flirt frequently, but some women give off a serious vibe or lack of interest and I'll avoid flirting. If you've never flirted with a friend, could you be giving off a serious vibe that makes guys less playful towards you?
/r/seduction21/05/17 02:06 AM
1

I had fun with it - you're reading upset when it's not there. Your original post could be replaced with "Had success making out with women weeks ago and now it's gone. What happened?" The bragging, since it doesn't add to your question, strikes me as bragging, which is why I enjoyed mocking it.
/r/seduction20/05/17 04:32 PM
1

Hm, upvote for "humans are so horny!"
/r/seduction20/05/17 04:15 PM
1

Think back to the first time you had sex. It was horrible. I would call a liar anyone who says they enjoyed it. What's your source for this information about every person who has ever had sex? Sex is wired into our pleasure centers. The people in the distant past who hated sex? They didn't reproduce as much.
/r/seduction20/05/17 04:14 PM
1

The only turn taking is when you're talking to a girl and he interrupts your turn to steal her away! Let's say you're both successful, but he takes 15 minutes and you need an hour to convince a girl. When he always stops by at the 30 min mark, he always gets the girl. So just point out that yes, it takes you longer to pick a girl up, and he needs to let you have that time without swooping in to make his move. And if he has an excuse for that, and insists on taking girls away from you, then you n…
/r/seduction20/05/17 03:42 PM
1

That might change if you flirt with friends, and build up comfort and attraction before even going on a first date. If you know someone for many months, flirt for weeks, and then go on a first date is it still too soon to have sex?
/r/seduction20/05/17 03:37 PM
1

Small group, yes... large group of women, no. You might see it differently, but in a large group of women you're just lost in the noise. So if it's a lot of women I'd just let them have their time together. But you, her and 1-2 girlfriends is very different. You'll be part of each conversation, and have a chance to make an impression on everyone several times. Personally I'm a flirt, and this situation is perfect for flirting without any mention of sex. If your idea of flirting tends to involve …
/r/seduction20/05/17 12:52 PM
10

I was about to ask about a forum on here for No More Mr Nice Guy, but a quick search reveals it: https://www.reddit.com/r/NMMNG/
/r/seduction20/05/17 12:18 PM
1

Can you coach him enough to be an okay wing man? And then actually go out and let him see it for himself?
/r/seduction20/05/17 10:08 AM
1

That's really funny! I didn't realize you took my humor as jealousy. Speaking of which, both of your posts have contained personal attacks on me, and I don't see any advice posted by you. If you think OP needs advice, you're not helping.
/r/seduction20/05/17 10:02 AM
0

Too bad you don't see OP as humble bragging, but that's my view.
/r/seduction20/05/17 07:48 AM
0

"I know, and 1 week ago I got into a makeout session with these 3 girls, and not only do they not know each other - but their friends don't know each other, either. And then I got a random makeout from a 9.3. I don't mean to be humble or brag or anything, but hey - look at me." /s
/r/seduction20/05/17 07:44 AM
3

You didn't ask a question! And you only end sentences with exclamation points! Why is this sounding exciting!
/r/seduction19/05/17 11:30 AM
1

So everyone is autistic, eh? You ever think that maybe you're not talking about other people when you say that?
/r/seduction17/05/17 11:18 PM
1

Thanks! I'll avoid quoting it, but there's still a lesson there for OP if you want to extract it.
/r/seduction17/05/17 04:37 PM
1

Technically this may be true, but it takes a lot of rejection. There's guys who literally ask every woman if they want to have sex, and they get rejected 98% of the time. They're creepy. So yeah, ask 300 women to have sex and maybe you're getting laid a few times. But the 300 women you ask, don't expect them or other people to be impressed.
/r/seduction17/05/17 04:32 PM
1

I hope this is entertaining more people than just me! But now you know he had a Freudian slip. He doesn't go up and ask a girl for her phone number... he goes up, asks a girl for a phone, and then has sex with her that same day. Subtle difference, and yes he paid for the sex. I mean phone.
/r/seduction17/05/17 04:29 PM
2

Ha ha! So you're calling him an idiot, but what if he's like an idiot savant at seduction? It wouldn't really matter if he's "not right mentally" if his points are valid, right? This is called shooting the messenger, and it doesn't fix anything on your end. Do you think you're going to improve just by agreeing with yourself? Try admitting you can be wrong and do something new.
/r/seduction17/05/17 04:23 PM
1

I don't see flirting as all or nothing. Think of it in more steps than that - finding a topic on which you both relate, and maybe adding some humor to see how she reacts. And then can you switch topics and keep it playful. Could you be picking overly sexual topics? That could show your actual intentions as being a little desperate to talk about sex, at which point someone might find that creepy. At least when I flirt, I'm never talking directly about sex.
/r/seduction17/05/17 04:05 PM
1

Have you been on a date with this girl? Just wondering why you use words like "hanging out" and "building ... connection". How do you know she's interested in a relationship, and not just as a good friend? Not knowing people at the party will likely be awkward. But yeah, you should try to chat briefly with some of her friends. Maybe reconnect with her after chatting with 1-2 of her friends, so she doesn't feel like you're spending all your time with her friends. Is there a reason why this has re…
/r/seduction17/05/17 03:50 PM
1

Make that two votes for a story that involves seducing a girl that was already interested in a celebrity.
/r/seduction17/05/17 03:42 PM
1

Maybe it bothers you, but just brush it off and don't worry about it. It's not likely to happen that often, so trying to change your behavior is only going to make future dates more awkward. You don't want to start asking prospective dates if they're lesbian - it's not going to help you get a date.
/r/seduction17/05/17 03:18 PM
24

After a coffee date she expects you to be exclusive? Maybe you should explain it to her: "You expect me to exclusively date you after a coffee date? The coffee wasn't that good." Sadly you have no idea how much drama you dodged. She's willing to set weird things up like this to try and control you before you go on one full date... well, it doesn't get better with time.
/r/seduction17/05/17 03:15 PM
2

Your handling of rejection is the most mature point, in my opinion. First it lets both you and the girl off the hook if it's not working. And it's the mature way to handle it. But you also go from a situation where you could have looked desperate ("Please date me! Please?!") to one where she might tell a friend you're a cool guy. And you never know if she changes her mind later. So for all that, definitely treat rejection smoothly and maturely.
/r/seduction17/05/17 03:11 PM
2

That's true, I do misconstrue it as micro managing. And your illustration of "first mate is captain in certain areas" is very helpful, thank you.
/r/RedPillWomen14/05/17 02:42 AM
1

Let's say you recorded him talking crap about his bosses and then played that recording to them. They'd have fired him on just that, right? It's not you that caused this - it's his behavior coming to light. I like this idea of yours where you limit information and see how people abuse the information you give them. Make sure you keep that in your toolbox to spot toxic people and gossips in the future.
/r/askTRP13/05/17 02:08 PM
1

There's a TED talk that suggests 10,000 hour milestone was only meant for beginners training all the way to Olympic heights. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MgBikgcWnY
/r/askTRP13/05/17 01:57 PM
3

Leaders don't handle every decision, so I'm curious where that line is drawn between captain and first mate. For example, if you want to start a new hobby or new class, do you provide your reasons and he can allow or disallow it? Or is you starting a new hobby entirely outside his purview?
/r/RedPillWomen13/05/17 01:21 PM
1

You claim they are your friends, so when have these guys had your best interest in mind? Do you hang out with them outside work, like on weekends? Can you go out to lunch with other co-workers, instead of this crowd every day?
/r/seduction05/05/17 12:10 PM
2

Free only after people give you their email address... Email addresses can be sold, which suggests it's not exactly "free".
/r/seduction05/05/17 11:53 AM
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