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stelladiver512 Archive

View 2 posts and 41 comments by stelladiver512 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
206

MINDSET SHIFTstelladiver512/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 03:12 PM
28

SEEKING ADVICEstelladiver512/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 10:21 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
18

I see it about access. If a person proves that they are not worthy of access to me, then that access gets taken away. Having my personal number is a privilege. I don’t block cause I’m upset, I block cause you a fool. And I don’t let fools have access to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 01:15 AM
69

This is so true. I was chatting with a guy on OD. He was very “nice” But once I mentioned I did yoga as a hobby his immediate response was “Oh boy does that mean you’re really flexible that would be nice for me.” I called him out on it and he excused himself, called it “flirting”. Immediately blocked and deleted him. But sure he thinks he’s being so nice but the second he has an opportunity he gets overly sexual and inappropriate and calls it flirty.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 04:44 PM
2

Truth. One I hadn’t heard from in a year (I forgot block #) just texted “how are you?” That it. He was fishing to see if I would still make myself available. But couldn’t even bother to be creative and engaging in his text
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 12:42 AM
11

Same
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 01:58 PM
1

Congrats sister on now making your life about YOU
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 05:47 PM
2

I will definitely check her out, just today I am working on cleaning the house all day. And I’ve gotten nothing but complaining and more stress added on from my family. Family life can be just a terrible dynamic for women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 08:33 PM
13

Thank you for sharing that mental load resource. It was eye opening.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 03:33 PM
74

Thank you for your post. I just got one of those “I still think about you” texts from a guy I dumped. I forgot to delete his # No reply from me... just block and delete. No second chances- men don’t change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 09:08 PM
15

Yes! Way to take care of yourself. I just did this recently and relate to how hard it can feel. A reminder block him *everywhere- not just phone #. It’s not a complete release from the toxicity if he can still see you on social media etc
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 04:52 PM
45

This is a deep issue and I don’t have an exact philosophy. My girl loves princesses and I am grateful for some of those newer stories being about more independent girls (Brave, Moana, Mulan). I loved Little Mermaid growing up and the music is so great - but the story is the worst! Give up your whole life for a man!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 06:16 PM
3

Powerful. I hadn’t done that. Just did. Thanks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 03:51 AM
21

Yes! Thank you. I just blocked-deleted a male friend cause the vibes were off. I blatantly told him I wasn’t attracted to him so I thought we could be friends. But now I see he was just “laying groundwork” like you said in case I became fuckable. Time wasted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 01:56 AM
10

This has happened to me three times since COVID- chatting with a OLD guy and then when I suggest a video call they flake or give some reason why meeting in person is “safe” (I’m in an area that still has high cases!). I say he’s not that into getting to know you or he would make more effort. Hard pass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 03:51 AM
1

Thank you for your thoughtful comment. I agree I used to think male friends were ok and FDS rules didn’t apply but now I don’t know. LVM behavior is rampant in romantic interests and friendships. They feel entitled to our amazing energy and awesome lives and I don’t want to give them anything they don’t earn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 09:06 PM
10

I’m new and I’ve read the handbook. In addition to reading the handbook sometimes it helps to put the issue out there on this sub and get feedback. It doesn’t mean I am not aware of the handbook. I think change takes time and the live support of others.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:47 PM
1

I did it. Thank you all for your support. I ended the friendship. Sent a short text and then blocked and deleted. I feel scared I think because I’m not used to standing up for my needs. But a big step for me to get LV people out of life - not only romantically but friends too. Wouldn’t have progressed if it wasn’t for FDS and all you amazing women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 06:45 PM
2

I have absolutely wondered this. Male friendships seem draining and I rarely get anything from the dynamic. Could be (with help of FDS) I am entering a new headspace about men in general. I see their LV selves easier, even in platonic situations.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 02:22 PM
3

Thank you so much for sharing. Your situation sounds hard and I’m impressed how you kept your standards. I hope to do the same!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 03:19 AM
5

Exactly - I feel like I’m always questioning his intentions and it drains my energy ... thank you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 02:09 AM
3

Thank you for your thoughts - I’m really trying to change my relationships and only have people in my life that hold me up and help me grow. Wish I could do the phone # change !
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 01:57 AM
5

This! Love the prune garden metaphor
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 01:11 AM
6

I love what you said here thank you for sharing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 01:03 AM
4

Wow thank you for this reply - it’s helpful
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 01:03 AM
10

Thank you for posting this article. I am a proud working-mom. I am also a public schoool teacher. I believe women will bear the brunt of the fall chaos. Keeps me up at night thinking about what my choices are, as a mom, as a professional, as half the income of my family, as an educator. So far my state, local govt, school district, even my immeditate supervisor can give me no relief or promise of relief. Most likely it will be more sacrifices and more difficult decisons for my family, which will…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 01:44 AM
3

I just did this recently and it was hard. I was most worried about my FWB guy texting back and me caving like I have in the past. I wrote a clear, definitive and short text. Then told him not to worry about replying cause I wouldn’t be engaging in texting anymore. And I blocked his number so I wouldn’t be tempted. Time to do you and not scatter your energy around to Fwb types. I already feel more energized and focused on my self and my hobbies because he’s not there accidentally distracting me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 04:32 AM
15

I’ve gotten suspicious of men who only work from home, by themselves, on a computer all day. I realize a lot of people do that these days (even before Covid). But I’ve noticed those men tend to be bad at socializing and have a lonely vibe about them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 04:06 PM
15

Ha no joke
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 04:01 PM
16

Yes! So disrespectful. I even hate it when guys start off with “you’re my type” like that’s a compliment, like I should be grateful and relieved? No.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 05:02 AM
2

Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 05:00 AM
4

FDS has changed me for sure. I broke it off with 3 men I was chatting with cause they had red flags that I’m learning to pay attention to. I would have let a lot of their red flags go, excused their behavior, and even blamed myself somehow (!) Now I’ve learned to cut it off, block, delete. Doing that I’ve seen my self esteem grow, as I value more my instincts & what I want from a relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/20 03:57 PM
7

Wow, my eyes are open. I was texting daily with a new match and we set a date for a video chat. Once that date was set he stopped texting for 2 whole days! And then popped up again suddenly 1 hour before the video chat. Like, “hey still wanna chat?” Gross! It never occurred to me he was doing that on purpose to bait me and test his dominance. Glad I immediately dropped him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/20 09:42 AM
65

This just happened to me! Glad you posted this issue. Guy I was seeing before COVID kept on asking me to come over. The third time I told him I wasn’t breaking stay at home orders, he said “do you consider yourself as immunocompromised!?” Like, he wants to have a debate with me about my choice to stay home ... he wants me to justify it. Cause he’s lonely and wants company. Thanks to all the strong women on FDS setting an example for me and keeping me motivated, I dipped, said bye.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/20 02:12 AM
120

Great idea! Just get it out in another format but don’t share with him. I struggle with this; I want to over explain. Gets me no where.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 01:57 AM
3

Praise! Needed. This. Today.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 06:35 PM
75

Yes!!! Just tonight I practiced a precept from the FDS handbook. “No last minute dates”. He’s trying to get me on a video call date within an hour even though I haven’t heard from him in 2 days. No. Felt good to stand my ground and uphold my standards. The micro messages we send to our self esteem matter! When we hold to our boundaries and standards we hold ourselves up!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 12:16 AM
7

I understand your dilemma and have the same issue. Honestly I’m in a phase of OLD where I just assume a man is porn sick until he can prove otherwise. Men who are using internet to date will most likely be using internet to get off, since it’s all just a click away. And porn is much more widely accepted now, most men don’t see a problem with it. I do check their social and behavioral patterns early on; his hobbies, how he talks about his free time, does he live alone(ie no kids), does he work fr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 03:17 AM
26

On a date once, after the man had paid for the food and drink bill, he told me “I owed him a burger or something” since he covered the whole bill this time. I had been vetting him for a month! And I thought it was legit. But after he said that I gave him 2 days of silence, then texted “I’m no longer interested”. All he replied back was “scratching my head here”. He didn’t know how cheap and disrespectful he was being. He was “great” in so many other ways ... so I think that men don’t reveal thei…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 01:47 AM
101

Believing red flags. I’m so used to excusing men’s bad behavior and allowing mixed signals... I have to push myself to follow my instincts on red flags. I look back and see all the shit I have let guys get away with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 12:23 AM
11

Totally relate! This happened with my last 2 encounters. I thought it was my problem they took forever in bed and become pumping robots. Now I’m seeing they were more likely porn addicts incapable of real sexual connection.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 05:45 PM
2

I am new to FDS and I am so glad I found this community. Trying to value myself while dating isn't easy for me. FDS has made me realize that I send micro-messages to myself when I chose to pursue LVM and don't expect more from dating. I have "let go" 2 guys since joining this sub, as I recognize bad behavior and red flags easier now. Thank you to everyone who posts and keeps up the support.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 01:03 AM
3

I have had the same problem! I have been texting with seemingly good candidates and then when I ask to talk on phone or facetime they stop texting or they ignore my request. That's low effort and I say it means he's not that into it. Disappointing for sure! but save your energy for someone who is excited enough about you to want to talk to you over the phone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 12:45 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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