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sunsista_ Archive

View 2 posts and 173 comments by sunsista_ on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
70

Debatesunsista_/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:20 AM
11

DATING ADVICEsunsista_/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 03:11 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

I'm a 26 year old woman that is thin and takes care of myself. Still not attractive to most men. If a woman is considered attractive it doesn't really matter how old she is.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 08:58 PM
0

They don’t realize that most women want to be loved and being used for sex isn’t ideal to us. guys will say things like “ugly women still get laid” yes but I want a real relationship, not to be a semen receptacle.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/25 09:23 PM
1

“Be confident even though you struggle and will be hated because of your immutable characteristics blah blah blah” Is how you and others essentially responded. Gee, thanks for the nothing advice.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/25 03:21 PM
1

Yes, so? I have researched all ways to improve my looks.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/25 03:19 PM
2

Why should I like something I have no choice over and face hate for?
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/25 02:23 PM
2

Because I still have dark skin and other undesirable physical characteristics?
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/25 02:15 PM
2

Exactly. People just gaslight knowing full well we have it worse, and getting surgery is for the best.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/25 10:47 AM
–

Stop saying “men”when you really mean unattractive people. Plenty of men have a ton of options. Plenty of women don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:06 PM
1

Best of luck to you
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/25 10:17 AM
-2

I’m not sure why my post angers you so much but I hope you heal.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/25 05:40 PM
1

I don’t want Black men of any ethnicity.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/25 04:41 AM
0

Wow, how dare I struggle with the thing I didn’t choose and negatively affects the majority of my life.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/25 01:56 PM
0

So you’re aware it does but still insist on gaslighting me lmao. Typical. I’m not defensive, simply in disagreement with most of you.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/25 01:25 PM
-1

Race plays a major role in dating and desirability, this is a proven fact.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/25 12:16 PM
1

Yup. Thats why I’m saving for ethnic rhinoplasty.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/25 12:13 PM
3

Same here. Be prepared for people on this sub to gaslight you.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/25 12:11 PM
1

There are plenty of people that don’t prefer or date their own race, ironically most of them being Black men. Doubtful you care when it’s them though, only BW’s preferences get policed.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/25 12:10 PM
1

Just because I don’t share the same perspective as you on race and beauty doesn’t mean I’m a “basket case”. Regardless, there are many men that agree with me according to statistics (especially Black men who prefer lighter skin on average) so they’re probably “basket cases” too, huh?
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 02:00 PM
3

Ok? I never said anything was wrong with BW but that doesn’t change our reality.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 01:53 PM
3

Good thing I don’t really want kids, but even if I did, the baby would most likely come out mixed with very different features from me. Kids don’t just take from one parent.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 01:52 PM
1

Looks are of course not the only factor or even the most important, but attraction is still an important factor. I want to be with someone I’m attracted to who is also attracted to me.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 03:04 AM
-1

When did I insult other dark skinned women? How I feel about myself has nothing to do with anyone else, stop taking MY experience personally.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 01:12 AM
2

You said I was wrong then went on a long-winded rant that proves I’m right…
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 12:49 AM
-2

I posted for genuine advice not moral grandstanding or empty platitudes about “self love”, and YOU came on to my post because it triggered you, some part of you clearly resonated and is in denial about it. That’s a YOU problem. The redpill men subreddit can be awful but one thing I will admit is they are much more honest with themselves and others than women are. I have a right to post whatever I want.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 12:45 AM
2

I obviously want guys I’m attracted to, hence why I intend on getting surgery and changing my look. I don’t want to settle just like I don’t want to be settled for.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 12:31 AM
2

I appreciate the suggestion, but I don’t see myself ever approaching men, this only works for conventionally attractive women.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 12:27 AM
5

Why should I have to settle for the few men that like those features when I can make myself more appealing to the men that I like? As I’ve said, I’m not interested in Black men and they make up the majority who are willing to accept (because they don’t actually prefer) those features. Yes, we live in a world that favors certain features over others. Nothing I can do to change that fact, but I can do things to change myself and give myself the best possible life.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 12:25 AM
5

I use dating apps and interact with men on there since I don’t get approached in person. Thank you for the advice
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/25 12:15 AM
3

Statistically it’s rare. BW are more likely to end up alone, I’m trying to avoid that.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 11:33 PM
2

You are taking MY feelings about my appearance as a personal attack and it’s very weird. BW are not a monolith, we don’t all look the same. But the fact is being Black on top of being unattractive is worse for us than for other groups, especially white people.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:35 PM
3

Never said I was changing my skin tone Ethnic rhinoplasty isn’t self hate, it’s making features that suit my face better.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:33 PM
4

I never said I was going to change my skin, that’s impossibly difficult to do in a way that’s not damaging. I’m just going to improve my appearance to make up for it (ethnic rhinoplasty is worth it based on what I’ve seen)
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:30 PM
5

Thank you for being in tune with reality. I don’t see any issue with wanting to improve myself physically.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:29 PM
-2

That’s nice but my post is about me personally, not you. I’m not claiming all BW have my experience.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:28 PM
-4

No I don’t. You don’t need to relate, BW are not a monolith we are individuals and I refuse to be boxed in. No thanks, I will do whatever I have the means to.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:27 PM
5

Yes, I have insecurities. That’s not a crime and I’m not going to pretend I love the way I look to make you comfortable. The better question is why do you care how I feel about myself? You can’t shame people into confidence, especially in a world that gives me every reason to be insecure. Anything else is just delusion and coping. If you’re confident and comfortable, that’s good for you. We don’t all have to be. Things I can change I will so that I can be happy.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:26 PM
-1

People have aesthetic preferences, I don’t see anything wrong with dark skin inherently and obviously many dark skinned women are pretty, but I personally don’t like having it and it only lowers MY SMV as a woman that is not exceptionally or conventionally pretty.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:21 PM
-1

It's really annoying that Black women cannot seek any self-improvement without being accused of self hate. I don't hate myself, I have things I don't like about my appearance like everyone does but I have self-respect and value many other things about myself. There is nothing wrong with wanting to change the things I can change.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:09 PM
2

I speak eloquently and I don't use slang or anything similar in my speech, I dress fairly casually unless for special events and I'm trying to prioritize style over comfort more. I'm skinny and tall with small breasts etc, so it's hard to find clothes that give me a good shape. Struggling overall, I've never been in a relationship. Thank you for your serious response and inquiries
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:07 PM
4

I never said Black women aren't pretty, I am speaking about myself, and we all know being black and unattractive makes it worse than being an ugly person of another race. The problem with BW like you, is that you assume talking about my experiences means I am speaking for all of us when I am not. I do not claim to represent all BW, only myself.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 10:03 PM
6

I don’t like Black men. And I don’t have self hate just because I want to improve my appearance and I’m realistic about how society views me.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 06:33 PM
-2

Looking better = being seen and treated differently. I don’t see how that’s unhealthy, it’s a natural result.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 06:32 PM
-1

I’m looking for genuine advice not empty platitudes, didn’t want to post on any sub because I didn’t want to get any attacked and thought this one would be more logical since it’s “redpill”. Guess not.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 06:31 PM
-5

You can go away then? I’m looking for genuine advice if you don’t have any then don’t reply.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/25 06:29 PM
1

Because I want a romantic life partner, not kids. And if things go wrong I don't want to be a single mother and trapped in a position that makes it difficult to find love again.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 12:43 AM
6

I'm a Black woman so no matter how feminine I am, I expect rejection.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 04:18 AM
1

I don't have to like Black men. We're all entitled to our preferences. And no, some women go through their whole lives with nobody interested in us.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 09:11 PM
2

Not all of us had many options when we were 20.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 04:49 AM
0

The average man still has more opportunities than an unattractive/below-average woman. We are either invisible or hated.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 04:39 AM
1

As a woman who is a virgin at 26 I realized this too late and virginity is only valued when you’re in your early twenties. My dream of losing it to a boyfriend in a relationship isn’t going to happen at this point.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 07:13 AM
1

I have a low SMV because of my race. My standards aren’t high at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 05:36 AM
1

All I know is it must feel great. But I’ve given up hope on ever experiencing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 08:41 AM
2

As a tall Black woman, I empathize with short men and being looked over/undesirable for something you can't control, regardless of other good qualities.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/24 01:26 AM
1

I prefer other races but outside of friendships, haven’t had any connections.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/24 05:48 AM
1

Yes, plenty of them flat-out hate us unless we fit a specific beauty standard (lighter skin, thick/curvy). I'm skinny and darker skinned so I fit no standard in my community and outside of it. Makes dating difficult if not impossible.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/24 01:13 AM
1

I've been rejected for my race, as a Black woman I've had to accept that most men see us as the bottom barrel and there's nothing we can do about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/24 12:49 AM
1

I answered already. I'm not on reddit 24/7....
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/24 09:58 PM
1

I did twice when I was younger, and was rejected.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/24 09:58 PM
-1

Just because a man is willing to have sex doesn’t mean I can get him. That’s what you guys don’t get. Sex isn’t as valuable to us as being loved is. men just want sex, I want a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 08:57 PM
2

I’ve never been pursued, asked out etc. on apps, men are only interested in sex. It’s a combo of both.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 08:54 PM
1

What does it imply?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 08:53 PM
0

I’m 25 and was told I’m undesirable due to my virginity now 🤷🏾‍♀️ Honestly I’m just gonna get some random guy or hire a male escort because I haven’t been able to find a partner and I’m tired of being judged over it on top of all the other things that affect my dating opportunities. I’m just going to get it over with.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 06:05 AM
1

Oh I skimmed so I didn’t realize lol, thank you
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/24 10:45 PM
5

In that case why the outrage for lonely miserable men? They’re not our problem either.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/24 10:40 PM
15

I made a post about how I’m still a virgin and because I’m 25 instead of a fresh 18 year old I got vehemently criticized and a whole lot of weird assumptions made about me. All because I only want to have sex within a relationship and haven’t been lucky enough to have one yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/24 10:39 PM
–

Yes, there are studies showing many either dislike Black women or simply find us unattractive. I’m not sure what point you’re trying to make?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 11:36 PM
–

When did I say all men are racist and colorist? I am talking about statistically. Obviously any man that I date won’t be.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 11:31 PM
–

Because I’m a heterosexual woman? Do you ask men who struggle to attract women why they want a woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 11:21 PM
–

I’m not asexual, and the few men that show interest in me ONLY want sex, not a relationship. At this point you’re basically accusing me of being a red flag for existing.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 09:06 PM
–

I’m an average looking woman with dark skin so I’m not the preference of most.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 08:48 PM
–

Yes, I avoid them due to my experiences. Which is what most people do when they have bad experiences with others.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 08:46 PM
–

“A few” Not one Black man has ever expressed interest in me, even on apps. Even then I believe we are all entitled to our preferences without being disrespectful or offensive.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 08:01 PM
–

I go out to work, shop, spend time with friends. I’m not out clubbing but I’m not a complete homebody. Introvert just means I’m more reserved and like to have my alone time sometimes. I do get exhausted/stressed sometimes in large social gatherings.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 07:55 PM
–

you’re a man, it’s different for men. Even though Black people are less desirable as a collective, Black men are viewed as masculine and like most men they actively pursue women which allows them to find partners more. Black women do not have stereotypes that work in our favor.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 07:49 PM
–

very dismissive but ok
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 07:47 PM
–

I’ve been rejected a lot for being Black, though I try to work with what I have and take good care of myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:07 PM
–

I’m neither.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:24 PM
–

But if a woman has sex with a man and he decides not to commit, she’s seen as damaged in the eyes of many others.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:22 PM
–

I think it would become obvious to them that I don’t have sexual experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:20 PM
–

So what is the solution? Lie about being a virgin and hope a guy who likes me enough doesn’t notice?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:15 PM
–

I have made it clear I’m not waiting for marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:17 PM
–

No, I simply tell them I’m a virgin if they ask about sexual experiences or dating history.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:10 PM
–

No I don’t. I would date another virgin as long as he is healthy and of sound mindset.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:09 PM
–

I don’t find virgin men undesirable.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:07 PM
–

Not true, I am not dismissive of men’s experiences. I know some have it harder dating. But I wish they understood there are women that struggle too, and it’s not by our own doing. Women get rejected too. I’ve been rejected by a male friend I had for being Black.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:03 PM
–

It’s mostly Black men who have had negative things to say about my appearance, not men of other races. I’ve been treated better by them even if they weren’t interested in me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:54 PM
–

I think that’s part of it but I think my race and appearance plays a role too. I don’t think I’d still be a single virgin if I belonged to another demographic.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:53 PM
–

I’m not waiting for marriage, just a relationship and trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:47 PM
–

I’m introverted and quiet naturally but I open up more with my friends and family. I don’t have any enemies. The few people I don’t get along with I simply avoid.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:42 PM
–

What places should I look? I don’t get approached in public settings.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:26 PM
–

I’m getting a lot of conflicting responses, I think it’s more accurate to say some men might not care. There are many that do.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:25 PM
–

always nice to know there are other women that understand. Feel free to message me anytime you feel like talking sis
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:22 PM
–

That’s a fair assessment. I don’t know how to change my energy though, I’m a naturally quiet person. If I try to be more extroverted I come off unnatural and forced. My friends seem to like me and I get along with people as long as they’re nice and not pushy though. If I was particularly bad looking, what would you suggest I do? Nobody is repulsed by me but nobody is knocking my door down either.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:21 PM
–

No I don’t view sex as dirty, I want to have it…in a relationship. Yes, I want a good man who deserves it. I have a sex drive and I masturbate. I’ve never been in a relationship because I’ve never been pursued for one. No guy has ever asked me out. The only dates I’ve been on were set up from apps, and didn’t work out because they only wanted sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:01 PM
–

I meant unlucky as in they don’t show romantic interest in me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:58 PM
–

The thing is I’m not even saving myself for marriage. I’m willing to sleep with a boyfriend, I just haven’t had one yet. All I want is a committed relationship and trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:38 PM
–

I’ve never been in a relationship so I’m not sure how I’ve projected anything. As I said, I’m only waiting for a relationship and trust before I get into bed with a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:36 PM
–

Ok. I don’t think being a virgin makes me better than anyone, I just don’t want sex without emotional intimacy and a relationship. It’s my personal preference just like yours is experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:34 PM
–

I’m not waiting for marriage. I’m waiting for a relationship
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:32 PM
–

I have a sex drive and I masturbate, I would be eager to learn how to please the right man. I’m not a prude, I just want emotional intimacy and a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:29 PM
–

Yes, but at some point in their lives the plumber and dentist hadn’t done those things yet either.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:28 PM
–

Why does it point to something not being right? Especially if I’m just a normal person who hasn’t been in a relationship yet?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:26 PM
–

Exactly. I keep getting very conflicting responses from all sides honestly. We’re told nobody wants a woman that engages in casual sex and to guard our wombs, but I’m also a freak for still being a virgin at my age because I haven’t found somebody who wants to date me seriously.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:25 PM
–

I don’t have any social deficiencies unless you count introversion as one. I have friends and acquaintances and a normal work-life balance. I do tend to keep to myself sometimes and I don’t go clubbing or anything like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:21 PM
–

I genuinely don’t know what’s going on other than I haven’t met any men that want a relationship with me. I’ve spoken to male friends and their advice is just for me to “keep trying” or get my virginity out of the way, it isn’t very good advice. Outside of America, being thin isn’t uncommon for Black women. It’s not even that uncommon in America. The Black community just prefers ass and thickness, which I don’t have.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:15 PM
–

I’m not an “obedient virgin who never leaves the house” As I said, I’m not religious. I live my life. I’m just a bit introverted and reserved. I want to protect myself from trauma that I’ve seen so many women experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:11 PM
–

How do I combat those assumptions?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:08 PM
–

The first one is very subjective and I take good care of myself but to many I might be due to my race/skin color. I don’t think I’m pretty but I’m not hideous either.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:06 PM
–

I am Black, average looking, tall and thin. men don’t typically compliment or approach me. I’m not waiting for marriage, just a committed relationship. I do not really want kids but I could re-consider with the right person, I do have a fear of pregnancy and single motherhood which is why I’m on birth control despite being a virgin. I want a good man, one I find decent if not attractive that wants a long term relationship. Good hygiene, healthy, a steady job, and a good personality a more import…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:01 PM
–

No, I didn’t. I don’t have religious trauma that makes me look down on sex or fear it, I just want emotional intimacy and a relationship to come with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 01:56 PM
–

My experience as well minus dating
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 01:46 PM
–

Ok.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 01:45 PM
7

I have never met a man who wants a relationship with me. Why is that so hard to believe?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 07:25 AM
1

So I should hide it? Won’t my inexperience be obvious?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:56 AM
3

I get it, but when I was younger and also a virgin I still didn’t attract men. So I’m not sure what to do anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:51 AM
5

My major issue is that no man has ever pursued a relationship with me. I’m aware that sex is easy to get for women but that doesn’t make it preferable when I want romance and emotional intimacy as well. I don’t want to be used for sex. And yes, Black women are statistically unlucky in love and have it harder to find quality partners, especially among men of our own race who are not known for marriage or commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:42 AM
2

A lot of these replies and my experiences have shown that many of them do care
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:33 AM
2

Well I don’t know how I’m supposed to prove it to those that think that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:26 AM
5

Yes, I’d love if my boyfriend was a virgin as well it would make me feel more comfortable and less insecure. But it’s not a requirement
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:19 AM
6

I’ve never met an 18 year old that wants to be a wife at that age.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:18 AM
2

I don’t know how else to meet men and find a potential partner considering I don’t get approached in person.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:02 AM
13

Good post, I appreciate your perspective and honesty.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:53 AM
9

I don’t have any men in the “friend zone”, the few male friends I have are either in a relationship or not attracted to me. I don’t go after hot guys and my standards are literally just good hygiene, healthy weight and not hideous. Those guys might sometimes match with me but they only want sex, while I want a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:45 AM
2

I deliberately avoid men who are exceptionally good looking. I know my league.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:40 AM
5

So why the obsession with virgins among men? It just seems like there’s no way to win because not all of us are lucky enough to encounter a good guy who wants to be with us in our early 20s.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:12 AM
2

Sure that’s what they prefer but I’m also aware many men will sleep with any woman that they think might be willing, and I don’t want that. I want a guy that genuinely wants me. A lot of men assume virgins are naive but we are not. We have friends and the internet. I appreciate your honesty.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:54 AM
6

What are the other methods?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:50 AM
4

Those guys very blatantly just wanted sex. A few of them were also weird about my race.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:43 AM
18

This exactly. They keep making up scenarios about me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:41 AM
13

They do, which is why they ghosted me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:40 AM
10

You misunderstood. In the eyes of a lot of men, Black women are inherently less attractive. There are studies on it, it doesn’t mean we can’t be attractive or are innately undesirable, it’s about perception.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:39 AM
9

I quite literally said this.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:37 AM
2

It’s not the same for Black women and I think you guys severely underestimate how much men care about status in dating too.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:37 AM
2

I was on tinder and my experiences were horrible.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:31 AM
1

Well that applies to all races, they tend to marry their own. But Black women are still least likely to marry and there are studies showing the darker the woman the worse her chances within the Black community. darker women in interracial relationships have a higher chance if they attract a mate of another demographic.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:30 AM
3

I don’t go for men who are hot/out of my league, the guys I like tend to be average looking. My biggest physical standard is good hygiene and being healthy/not fat since I meet those requirements myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:27 AM
6

I don’t expect my first time to be perfect but if it’s terrible AND with a man that doesn’t truly like me, I will feel like shit afterwards. That’s what I’m afraid of too,
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:19 AM
3

It isn’t worth it unless you’re an attractive woman. I’ve spoken to men I know on this and most agree that if it was by a woman they don’t desire they’d just see her as desperate.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:06 AM
7

I never said I was attractive, I am average and to some below due to my race. Thin is not the same as attractive, if I was attractive I would have been pursued by men. I am a normal person who goes to work and has hobbies. I’m introverted but not a recluse.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:05 AM
16

Yes, I gathered that.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:01 AM
2

I’m not trying to gain a pity party and I never said I was some hideous beast, I’m simply not pretty. I am mostly average looking as many women are but the average looking Black woman is not perceived the same or desired as the average woman of other races. I don’t understand why you think I am trying to gain pity when I made it clear I am seeking genuine advice and discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:00 AM
2

I live in a diverse community. It’s nearly 50% non-white Being tall and thin doesn’t automatically make me desirable as a woman, I don’t have a model face and being Black is a turn off to a lot of men statistically. So I have that deck stacked again me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:54 AM
3

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:31 AM
3

That’s good advice, thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:30 AM
8

These assumptions are getting annoying. I have never been pursued. On dating apps, the guys that show interest in me only want sex. Not all women are surrounded by simps in waiting or whatever rhetoric you believe. I’m not even attractive enough to have simps.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:27 AM
3

Top percentage? I reply back to whoever shows interest and try to get to know them. Once they realize I’m a virgin who doesn’t want casual sex I get dropped.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:24 AM
2

I don’t get approached by men irl
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:20 AM
3

Where exactly did I make any excuses? I just answered your questions and explained my experiences/preference I am 5’10, 130 lbs and in the U.S. I don’t feel comfortable giving out any more personal information.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:19 AM
7

My experiences and I don’t fit the Black community’s standards. Most Black men prefer lighter skin and if not that then a curvy or petite body and I am tall and thin. I’m also aware that obviously the majority of men of other races do not like Black women, but they respond to me more positively than Black men because of my personality. Also, I find men of other races more attractive and relatable in interests/values
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:14 AM
4

Can I ask what makes me a complete mess? I’m a very average woman aside from my virginity status.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:11 AM
5

Not interested in Tyrone or Chad, I just want a good man.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:09 AM
8

I’m not religious or interested in a religious relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:08 AM
5

Not sure which is the preferred outcome.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:07 AM
5

I masturbate and know what I like sexually.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:06 AM
9

Not religious, I was an average person throughout my life, I’m introverted but not a recluse, I have many acquaintances and a small circle of friends. I’ve never been pursued by men for a relationship but if I had I probably would have lost mine sooner. I’m not compatible with most Black men and I’m not their preference physically, other races seem to like how I look a bit more.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:59 AM
13

Yes, those studies are true. There’s a lot of negative stereotypes regarding us that make it harder for those of us who don’t fit them. And we are expected to be hypersexual and easy so when we aren’t we still put men off. I won’t pretend it doesn’t suck.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:56 AM
7

Unfortunately those are the only ones I seem to attract. I haven’t yet met a man that wants a relationship with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:53 AM
7

I don’t feel sexual guilt. I do put importance on my virginity but not out of religious beliefs or ideas of purity.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:52 AM
4

I think I’m average but some might consider me ugly. I’m tall and thin and I don’t fit the beauty standard in any community due to being a Black women. I do take care of myself and put effort into my appearance though.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:50 AM
2

It wasn’t a goal, my goal was a relationship and losing it to my boyfriend. I’ve never been in one.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:48 AM
10

I also have a friend who is similar to me. Though her only obstacle is her weight. I’m thin, but I don’t have much luck with men for some reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:48 AM
7

I have a sex drive. I masturbate regularly. I’m just not desperate and I want my first time to be within a committed relationship with someone I feel values me. Not all women are driven by sex, some of us just have discipline and standards. And some of us are just not pursued by men who see us as worthy of commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:46 AM
8

Most of the women I know who were raised catholic were having sex in their teens. Religion doesn’t play a role in my virginity. I’ve just never had a relationship and I was only interested in sex with a committed boyfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:42 AM
5

I’m aware of that, what I mean is I want a committed relationship but if my virginity is that much of an obstacle I might consider a hookup to just get it over with before I get any older.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:39 AM
6

I was raised by catholic parents but I don’t practice or go to church and wasn’t pressured to past my tween years. I don’t know what else to use despite dating apps. I’m an introverted person and I’m not particularly pretty so men don’t approach.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:36 AM
5

I don’t avoid the opposite sex, I suppose I’m just not desirable to most of them. Men don’t approach me. I’m trying to do everything I possibly can to fix that though.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:34 AM
12

Yea, that’s what I figured. None of that applies to me, I just want a serious relationship and to not be used for sex but I’m thinking about just getting it over with a casual hookup before I turn 26. Although the idea is still nerve-wracking.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:32 AM
10

I’m not religious. I just don’t want to be used for sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:30 AM
16

Yea I’m just gonna give up on dating apps as I don’t like using them anyways and the stats are against me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 02:29 AM
1

That dynamic doesn’t benefit women at all actually, which is why so many women experience emotional manipulation by men and are used for sex without even realizing it. It especially doesn’t benefit those of us that want genuine relationships but aren’t conventionally attractive/desirable to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/24 07:22 PM
1

Elderly Women and women who are considered ugly are still raped. This is a gross mindset, rape is about power not beauty. I’m an “ugly” woman and I’ve still been sexually harassed by men who made it clear they think I’m ugly and hate women of my demographic.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/24 06:41 PM
2

As an average looking Black woman who isn’t overweight, we are still undesirable to men when it comes to relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/24 06:36 PM
1

The statement is true but it’s never been meant to be a compliment. In fact it’s more insulting as a woman who struggles to find love/attract men because I don’t find it flattering that some random guy would be willing to use me as a semen receptacle, I want a life partner that desires and loves me and takes pride in being with me. women want genuine love, while men want sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/24 06:33 PM
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