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tansandbeaches Archive

View 15 posts and 109 comments by tansandbeaches on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Ooh good idea! I'll look up some recipes! Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 05:48 PM
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Does anybody have any ideas on how to make a keto picnic? The guy I'm seeing is super dedicated to his keto diet (I've tried to convince him to get ice cream with me many times and he won't budge lol), but I have no idea what keto dishes would be good to make (stuff that's good lukewarm or cold, but also high protein). So far, all I know is that I'm gonna make a coleslaw for him, but I'm open to any other suggestions!
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 04:34 PM
1

Whoa thank you! I just skimmed through it and it definitely looks like an interesting read. Seems like useful stuff!
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 10:56 PM
2

I agree that in this day and age, it makes sense for women to give stronger IOIs before you've started seeing each other, as he might be extra careful not to cross your boundaries. Before he asked me out for the first time, I started conversations with him, sat next to him everyday (we're in the same class), and gave him a little pat on the shoulder every now and then. If I didn't, I'm not sure we would've started dating in the first place. Now that we've been on a few dates and that we've kisse…
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 06:34 AM
2

That's a good idea! I get so antsy waiting for him to ask me out, but I guess that's part of the fun of dating lol, and gives me more time to think of something to suggest! Thank youuu!
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 06:26 AM
3

This exact subject is on my mind! The man I started seeing has made all the plans, and I want to show my gratitude/take initiative and ask him out too, but I'm a little worried that me asking him out to the movies or dinner would take away the appeal of the chase. I do really like him so far though, and I want to treat him right. Curious what everyone has to say!
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 10:19 PM
2

That's the goal! Just trying to make it to that point hehe
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 06:24 AM
2

Thank you, I definitely needed to hear that. I'll try to live more in the moment :)
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 06:23 AM
1

I don't have much experience myself of what to do if one is devout, but I can go off on what my mother told me she did! She never had a sit-down, stiff talk with my dad where she said that she is Very Catholic and Won't Take Otherwise. Instead, she showed him how devout she was by first mentioning that she grew up going to an all-girls Catholic School and that she goes to church every Sunday. Then, when things got more serious between them, she would invite him to church and see if he was willin…
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 06:22 AM
2

Yeah, I think I really like this guy, and I've messed up in the past by just acting foolish in the early stages so I don't wanna do that here. I'll try to find a way to mention my goals soon! Thanks for explaining it to me :)
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 08:30 AM
1

Ah, I see, thanks for sharing. When did you bring up monogamy when you were first dating your husband? That's true - promises are one thing, but actions are another. It's probably much more likely that a man of good character will accept AND follow through on his promise to commit to you. I guess that's why I wouldn't bring up monogamy/exclusivity until I knew about his character very well. Thanks so much for sharing!
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 09:35 PM
1

Thanks for the recs! I'll be sure to check 'em out!
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 09:33 PM
3

I agree it shouldn't be very complicated, but I remember the last time I started dating a man, I overdid it and tried to project my best RPW qualities too much - it understandably turned him off. After reading RPW for the past 7 months, I guess I've learned to take a more nuanced approach to showing my qualities instead of just acting like "I'm undamaged! and submissive! and feminine! and a soft place to land!" immediately after meeting someone, lol!
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 09:33 PM
1

Good point! I think that's a question that should come up after serious engagements, like a marriage proposal, are made. At this point, I think you can discuss whether or not one of you are willing to convert for the other, and if not, how willing they are to accommodate to the other's fate. This is what I meant by similar values despite religion - if both individuals are very devout to their respective religions, this may be a difficult pairing. However, if one or both are of that religion but …
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 09:30 PM
2

Haha it's okay! C'est la vie :)
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 05:45 AM
1

Hm, you're right too! I'm a little conflicted about how to proceed now, haha.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 05:36 AM
6

I think you bring up a great point - if I text first and he doesn't really reply, he probably isn't that into me in the first place. Especially since my guy is a bit more introverted, I'm sure it took a lot of courage to ask me out. He probably won't stick around for too long if I don't show that I'm interested too! Though I think I have - we've kissed twice hehe :P
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 05:36 AM
2

Wow, I've definitely never taken this approach but it's worked for you! I'll take it into consideration! #1 might be hard for me, but I really like #2 - let him take the lead and be the captain instead of trying to plan everything myself! #4 is also a good one - I'm gonna start trying to get him to open up more about his passions and hobbies! When did you start progressing physically with your husband, if you don't mind me asking? Feel free to PM me that if it's a little too personal for you, or…
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 05:33 AM
2

You make a good point! I'm sure people have different things on their own respective lists, so it's hard to pinpoint exactly what to do. I guess that's where compatibility plays in?
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 05:29 AM
2

Added to the list of cool femininity youtubers I gotta check out hehe
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 07:10 AM
1

Thank you! Will do.
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 07:10 AM
5

I agree to an extent, but I do think her views are a bit polarizing when it comes to not dating someone who isn't in the same religion as you. Of course, if your values differ a lot, I don't think it's a good idea either, but I think that there's a lot of good men out there from other religions. Still, this is my take as a person who's quite moderate with her Christianity, so I can understand how someone who is more devout like her feels that way. That's the only thing that I disagreed with thou…
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 07:09 AM
2

Ooh, I think I've watched a few of her videos as well! She's a cool gal :)
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 07:06 AM
1

Awesome, I'll check her out too!
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 07:05 AM
10

I’m in college too, so I definitely understand your frustration with hookup culture. Still, I’ve been on a good amount of dates this semester. Most of them took place during the day, so I could simply tell them I have something planned right after the date when they ask what I’m up to that day. In fact, you should actively schedule something for after the date so you’re not lying to them - it comes off more natural this way. If it’s a dinner or night-time date, you could tell them you have plans…
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 03:54 AM
27

I can't remember where I read this, but someone likes you if they show consistency (texts everyday, dates initiated on a constant basis, etc) + escalation (ex: meeting ==> getting phone numbers ==> texting ==> group hangout ==> date ==> meeting his friends ==> exclusivity ==> meeting parents, etc). I think it's pretty accurate!
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/19 11:30 AM
1

Ooh, thanks for the example! It's always so much easier to envision these RP theories when I can actually see it in action.
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 03:57 AM
2

The Latin American dynamic between an alpha male and an alpha woman seems very appealing! I'm not quite there yet, but it's definitely something to inspire to. I think it's interesting how racial dynamics plays into this as well. Thanks for sharing about your experience!
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 03:54 AM
1

At first I didn't think so, but many people including you are thinking it is! I'm reconsidering..
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 03:01 AM
1

I don't want to seem too in his face. We are just friends, after all. I feel like asking him too much would just make me seem overly eager.
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 03:01 AM
3

Wow, this is great! I think out of all of these, I struggle with keeping my cool under pressure the most, as I'm a pretty anxious person. Definitely something I need to work on. I love what you've written about mirroring his sense of honor, and also making sure that his moral compass more or less fits within my own values. This is incredibly helpful - thank you so much!
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 03:00 AM
2

I tried looking around in the sidebar for the dominance post but I couldn't find it. If you ever stumble upon it again, I'd appreciate it so much if you could PM it to me or something!! But I get what you're saying for sure. I think he's looking for a high dominance woman who is submissive to him. I've always felt the same as you about submission - it took a lot for me to naturally want to follow along and let a man become a Captain. I don't know why with this guy I can't do that - I think it's …
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 02:56 AM
2

LOL, interestingggg!
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 02:50 AM
1

Oh, I don't know who the other girls he's been with are, if they were my friends I would never go for him because that wouldn't be fair to my friends. But I think what you're saying has some truth to it. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one attracted to him, but it's frustrating to try to get his attention if he already gets it from so many other girls. I definitely get the sense that he could get casual relationships with who he wants, but I'm hoping that he'd be open to more than that w…
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 02:49 AM
1

I’ll take this into consideration! If our interactions show that we’re both socially submissive down the line, I’ll move on.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:02 PM
1

Just based on how assertive he is in the face of conflict, I’m leaning towards the latter, but I’m not sure myself. Do you have any advice on being a bit more like the 2nd case? I usually don’t have any trouble pushing back at men if they neg me playfully, but something about him makes me super nervous and I’m a lot more quiet and agreeable as a result.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 04:01 PM
3

Good point. Rather than tailoring my personality, I think I’m just good at reciprocating whatever vibe I get. If they’re sweet to me, I’m naturally sweet back. If they tease me and are mean (as long as it’s playful), it’s pretty easy for me to reciprocate. For some reason, I can’t read this guy. He’s more quiet and stoic, so the ball’s more in my court with how our interactions go, something that I’m not used to at all.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:59 PM
1

Will do! He actually seems like he gets a lot of girls. In our mutual friend’s words, “this guy fucks,” LOL. As of right now we’re just friends, so I’m not jealous that he has other women in his life. Let me give you a little more info on our dynamic. Another man we both know asked me out to lunch, and I agreed. This man told him about it, and he promptly asked me how my date with that guy went. When I asked him if he’s seeing anyone in response, he told me about a girl that he’s a few dates dee…
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:55 PM
2

Haha, that’s true too! I’m just a little concerned because in a different conversation I had with him and all of our other friends, we basically were discussing whether or not alphas and betas exist. He thought they definitely did, and told each of us if he thought we were alpha or beta. He said I was beta, which makes me think that he’s not just saying he wants a girl to put him in his place to make me think he’s a modern feminist man and get to me that way.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:47 PM
1

Wow, thank you so much. This makes a lot of sense! I think I’m just super nervous around him so I seem a bit more shy and agreeable than I usually am, but I’m definitely gonna try to break out of my shell more and voice my thoughts! You’re right about being in the same friend group, though. I’m super glad I found out we have so many mutual friends and started hanging out in that context.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:43 PM
1

Haha! Noted!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:40 PM
2

Type 2 would be ideal! I’m naturally like this, but because I’m so nervous around him, I probably seem super submissive.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:40 PM
2

I definitely have no idea what he wants sexually. I feel like he was only talking about relationship dynamics and not sexual dynamics, but the two are quite intertwined so I should start to consider it. I would be down to play if he was a 1 or a 2, or even a 3 if he still wants to be dominant socially with me but more sexually submissive in the bedroom. I wouldn’t be down to be a dominatrix ALL the time though LOL. Sometimes I need to be put in my place too :P
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:38 PM
4

You might be right, but I think he was talking more about relationship dynamics rather than sexual dynamics.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:33 PM
3

Thanks for sharing about your own relationship dynamic! That sheds some light on my situation! Moreso than faking, I think I’m just nervous around him because I’m so attracted to him and I wanted some guidance on how to proceed, because in his presense I feel like my brain just kinda stops working as it normally does LOL. I’m the type of person where I match the energy of the people around me. In all of my past interactions with men who have been interested in me, if the man is sweet and kind I …
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:32 PM
5

Nicely said! Besides being classy and having something going on for you in your life, what do men respect in your opinion?
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:26 PM
6

That totally makes sense! It’s strange - some guys I’ve talked to are quite challenging and tease me a lot, and with those guys, I have no trouble pushing back and giving them just as much shit as they give me, lol, as long as it’s lighthearted and playful. Something about this guy makes me more inclined to just defer, perhaps because he’s a little more stoic or maybe because I’m just very attracted to him and nervous around him. Either way, I’ll try to be more of my normal self around him!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:24 PM
7

Thanks for the insight! I’m gonna be a little more bold when bantering with him instead of just deferring like I did before and see how it goes! You’re right - it’s all about testing things out and adjusting accordingly!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 03:21 PM
2

Thanks for the insight! This makes a lot of sense.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/19 01:58 AM
2

What should you do to hold a man’s interests? I feel like that’s the core of what RPW is, but it’s hard to discern what it is exactly.
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/19 10:22 PM
1

Haha, I still feel like that move takes a lot of guts! There's a guy who took my number a few months ago but we never really had a long texting convo. Just the thought of texting him something makes me nervous, but it's cool to hear that you did that with your current SO! I don't think it's a negative thing for females to pursue a bit as well. I'm just quite shy, young, and inexperienced, so it seems a bit jaunting.
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 07:24 AM
4

Wow, I wish I could be as outcome-independent as you! Making the first move is something I've been thinking about doing but recoiling every time because I fear rejection. It's inspiring to hear about someone who doesn't, and about a case where rejection reversed and led to marriage down the line! Thanks for sharing!
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 07:22 AM
3

That sounds so sweet. It looks like you being vulnerable and putting your cards on the table payed off!
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 07:20 AM
3

Hm, I don't know. I've tried doing this and the guy ended up thinking I was just a little dumb. In high school, some guys are a little bad at picking up the nuances of flirting and are more likely to have a "what you see is what you get mentality." So if you play dumb, he might actually think you ARE dumb.
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 06:59 AM
2

I wouldn't! When I was still in high school a few years ago, I tried to ask this guy questions I already understood so that he would help me and talk to me. A few months down the line, he asked me to prom and we dated for a little bit. When I told him that I asked him questions just to flirt with him, he was shocked and said, "I just thought you were a little slow." LOL so I think it's best to not act dumb because it might reflect badly on you. Feel free to ask him for help if you actually need …
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 06:57 AM
5

Turn around and ask him to compare answers for your classwork! Don’t play dumb, but try to get his input and give yours too. Then you can start to get to know him once you become class buddies!
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/19 08:06 PM
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Your Steakhouse Saturday sounds like such a dream!
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/19 08:04 PM
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I’m planning to make egg drop soup, cacio e pepe, and tuna onigiri! I’m on the lookout for a good protien to add to one of these meals.
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/19 08:03 PM
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Garden pea or butternut squash soup if she needs something a little filling! If you and your relative like korean food, soft tofu (soondubu) soup is easy to make and has a lot of protien!
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/19 07:50 PM
0

Ooh, that’s interesting lol I don’t know much about online dating but it’s cool to hear about people’s experiences w/ them!
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 03:20 AM
3

I’m not your typical beauty at all! If I’m someone’s type, I’m probably a 7-8, but I’m definitely not everybody’s type! I think it helps that I do almost everything alone, so men are less nervous to approach me. Also, I’m usually only talking to around 2-3 guys at a time, so I definitely don’t want you to think I’m getting approached all the time lol!
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 03:19 AM
2

I can’t speak for everyone else, but for me it’s a combo of guys approaching me (I probably accept to go on dates with 1 or 2/4 of them) and using a lame excuse to talk to guys I think are cute (someone wrote a post about this here but I’m on my phone and can’t link! It’s a cool idea!). I strike up conversations with a good amount of people, men and women, everyday, and a few of the men I talk to ask to keep in contact afterwards.
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 01:25 AM
1

I like your point about dating with a purpose! I’m fairly young, so marriage is still a little scary to think about, but I know I want it sooner rather than later so I’m trying to be more comfortable and upfront that those are definitely my goals for the next 5-10 years.
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 01:22 AM
2

Yeah, I think my definition of multiple dating aligns more with going on many dates with multiple men more than dating multiple men for extended periods of time! It definitely did help me learn how to be a better date and let me see with real life examples behaviors I like and don’t like in men.
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 01:20 AM
2

I can definitely see the benefits of being able to focus on one man in fostering a better connection with him! That’s the feeling I think I’m missing out on because of multiple dating.
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 01:18 AM
2

How long does it take you to realize if someone’s a suitable match? To vet thoroughly, I’d say it should take at least 1-2 months of getting to know them before you decide to invest. In that period, that’s when I would still be multiple dating. I’m definitely down to be all-in after that period, but it’s a little too risky for me to do it before. I think you’re right about over-investing though. When I first found RPW without understanding its nuances, I thought it meant that I should just be as…
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 01:16 AM
1

The thing is, once I stopped being too eager to please a single man right off the bat, I had a lot more success and attention, the type of natural abundance you’re talking about. My looks and how often I went out didn’t change at all. I think it has something to do with the fact that the men were chasing me, instead of me chasing them. I agree that dating every single man who’s interested in you isn’t the best idea. Even while I multiple dated, I still only dated men I saw potential with. Being …
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/19 08:30 PM
1

Good point! This is something I suck at, haha. Even if I’m attracted to a friend, it’s a little difficult to flirt with them because I don’t want to make things too awkward for them. Gotta work on that!
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/19 08:23 PM
2

Wow, I love this question and am curious to know what everyone thinks. At least from what I’ve noticed of other women in their early 20s, being a side plate and alpha-widowed is over-exaggerated. At my college, there are TONS of people in committed, exclusive relationships. Most of these relationships started off as hookups, then became FWB, and slowly became exclusive. Because I was pretty innocent when I found RPW, I have to admit I was kind of scared out of going into something as an FWB with…
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/19 07:40 PM
3

Hm, idk if I’m seeing a more updated version but it says you got 37 upvotes, which is a lot!
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/19 06:47 AM
5

Sorry that you're in this situation. I don't know your ex, so I don't know if he's being genuine or not. Even if he is, I think you guys have different standards of what it means to be faithful, which will cause problems to arise. I wouldn't lose hope on dating though. There's plenty of men out there who agree with you on what constitutes flirting and what doesn't! Good luck girl!
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/19 04:13 AM
4

I think there's still room for his response to be less forward. He could have just said haha, or said some other witty response that wasn't so direct with his attraction to her. And her first message does imply that he was liking a lot of her pictures or tweets, prompting her to message him about it. Liking someone's pictures and tweets isn't a problem, but his response to her is problematic in my opinion.
/r/RedPillWomen09/02/19 09:59 PM
6

I would be okay if my man flirted if it came spontaneously and naturally. People talk to other people and being anything slightly more than friendly can be flirty, which is okay with me. An example of this is if he sat next to a woman on the train and they struck up a conversation, and started to hint at a mutual attraction. That’s totally fine with me, and I’d even be a little happy that someone else thinks my man is cute. He should have enough boundaries to cut it off after the train ride thou…
/r/RedPillWomen09/02/19 08:01 PM
7

I think he’s trying to say that just as RPW could potentially be used by a woman with “bad” intentions (secure a husband by acting perfect and let yourself go completely once they get what they wanted, withhold sex, divorce rape), TRP can also be used by a man with “bad” intentions (spin plates by dangling commitment over women’s heads but never giving it to them because they’d prefer to have a “soft harem” of women to pick from, alpha widowing every woman they date in the process). Just because…
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/19 06:45 PM
3

I LOVE Chef John! His shakshouka and baba ganoush recipe are both delicious! I also love the way he talks hehe. I'll try looking for some of Julia Child and Marcella Hazan's recipes! At the moment I watch a lot of Gordon Ramsay and Alex French Guy Cooking. I think those are all perfectly valid explanations for the phenomenon. We can't put all of the blame on women when the entire culture around nuclear families is shifting. It's more of a paradigm shift than an issue of blame anyways. ​
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/19 06:21 AM
2

Hm, I think it may have something to do with the quarantine on TRP but I'm not sure how to get around it.
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/19 06:17 AM
2

I think the effort that you put into cooking and packing his lunch is much more important to him than a few mishaps in the kitchen! Your husband sounds like a lucky guy!
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/19 06:17 AM
5

I'd say it's an overgeneralization that all modern men cook and enjoy cooking for sure, but at least in my small circle, 3 out of the 4 guys know how to cook and enjoy it at varying levels. I can't say for everyone else though. Maybe it's because we're all quite young and grew up on internet culture, but we all love nerding out to Youtube cooking shows like Binging with Babish, Munchies, and First We Feast (they like this one in particular because rappers we listen to will guest star and have co…
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/19 05:23 AM
2

Haha, that's exactly how my older cousin was too! The microwave explosions were interesting, but now I look forward to whenever she decides to cook for the both of us. Great to hear that you've become confident in your abilities though! You sound like you have a very balanced family life! It's something for me to aspire to :)
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/19 05:01 AM
15

Yes, they are quite hurtful. I think those men are just angry or disillusioned with what happened to them in the modern dating world, but to me if you can overlook their harsh tone it highlighted that cooking really is something that men look for. People rarely talk about it anymore, so I kind of assumed that today's men don't care anymore. That post showed me that many still do.
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/19 03:33 AM
1

I love the daytime dresses from Reformation - they're super high quality, youthful, and trendy. I have small hips but I also have hip dips like you, so I love their A-line dresses and wrap dresses because they cinch at the waist or just above it and flare out where my hip dips are. These get a little pricey, but I keep their style in mind when I'm shopping at more affordable stores like Zara or ASOS too! When it's a little colder, I wear high waisted mom jeans (which are tight around the booty b…
/r/RedPillWomen29/01/19 01:56 AM
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Whoa, smart! Thanks :)
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/19 10:39 PM
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That looks delicious! I've been craving curry too! Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/19 10:39 PM
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I have a ton of homemade beef broth leftover, and I have no idea what to make with it! Would love any suggestions!
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 08:03 PM
2

I also had social anxiety when I first started dating! I didn’t know how to make a connection with a man in real life, so I used dating apps and went on a lot of first and second dates over the course of ~2 years. It made me a lot more comfortable with men in a romantic context. I stopped using dating apps about 6 months ago, because although I did learn a lot from using them, I wanted to start meeting people organically. The experience I had from the dating apps translated over to real life, an…
/r/RedPillWomen15/01/19 06:34 AM
1

That's very true! I'll try to get a little closer to him if I run into him again!
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/19 08:30 PM
3

Whoa, I never even considered this. I never had any feelings for Bryan, but now that I'm thinking about it I don't know if that's the case vice versa. I had a managerial position in the extracurricular too, so Bryan often scheduled time for us to work on finding sponsorships together. It was often just the two of us and he always offered to buy my coffee (I never let him). I never paid any mind to this, but coupled with some other instances, I'd say there's a possibility he might be attracted to…
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/19 08:28 PM
1

He does seem shy and introverted around me, but while I was observing him interact with the other people at the party before he started drinking, he didn’t seem that shy at all (granted, most of Bryan’s friends were men). Which makes me wonder if he’s uninterested in me or just nervous. Huh, I never thought about it that way! I’ve never been attracted to Bryan at all, so when Anthony talked him up, I just joined in because I wanted to make my friend feel better. I can see why Anthony would do th…
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/19 09:48 AM
2

Hopefully this is the case! Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/19 09:44 AM
1

Smart! I'll hit up his friend soon and see what he says.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/19 05:04 AM
1

Thanks for the suggestion! I'll definitely read up on that blog post! I think you're right - letting it play out might be the safest way to get away from this.
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/18 03:38 AM
2

I can see the reality in what you've said in my relationship with her. She has a lot of mental breakdowns that lead to a lot worse, and I give her a lot of attention and reassurance to make sure she doesn't hurt herself. After nearly a decade of knowing her, your point really resonates (and is also something that a counselor told me when I brought it up to her) - as a BPD person, it's the attention that comes from those emotional lows that she finds herself that she craves, not actual help. I do…
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/18 03:38 AM
1

I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. That seems very stressful and I'm glad you've come to understand the true nature of your relationship so that you can take care of your own mental health instead of being subjected to the issues she brings. I do enjoy her company. She's an extremely funny and caring person when thing are good, but when things aren't it's really scary for everyone who cares about her, like her sister, her boyfriend, and I. She's also extremely stubborn and doesn't take crit…
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/18 03:33 AM
2

That's true. It isn't so much of the fact that I'm worried about the stigma she has as a person with BPD - it's more like I recognize a lot of the symptoms in her behavior and how it affects me and the other people in her life. She doesn't lie, but she often blows things out of proportion and I can definitely see how much she has manipulated her boyfriend who is basically walking on eggshells around her at this point. Now that I go to college away from her, I don't deal with it much anymore but …
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/18 03:28 AM
1

She doesn't see a therapist anymore and isn't on medication. I can remember many accounts of where she tries to be the victim, and she does it convincingly enough that I believe her until I hear the other side of the story. I'm honestly glad that we go to colleges that are far away from each other because I don't have to get entangled in drama that she finds herself in, as much as I hate to admit it because she's one of my oldest friends.
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/18 03:25 AM
1

I've definitely asked how I can help, but usually it gets me entangled in the drama that she has with the men and friends she has in her life which is quite tiring. I'll definitely consider sending her those books though! Thanks for the link :)
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/18 03:23 AM
1

That's a good point too! Your friends undoubtably influence who you are as a person and that's definitely something I have to keep in mind.
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/18 03:22 AM
2

I totally agree with u/girlwithabike! I have a very low n-count and I'm very inexperienced, and I think the reason for that is because I just don't put myself in situations where it could be raised very often. I'm willing to become intimate with the right man, but I don't want to just give it up because he gave me the tingles and we happened to be home alone. I know I get very attached if anything physical happens, so I don't want that to cloud my judgement when I'm vetting him and I don't want …
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/18 07:24 PM
2

Thanks for sharing! I love that you cooked for your LTR on your third date! I think I'd be ready to do more than a peck, but I don't wanna take the risk with cuddling and have my hormones get the best of me and let it escalate too much. I'll keep this in mind whenever it is I invite him over!
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/18 07:21 PM
1

Okay! I'll try to suggest some fun ideas tonight! And you're right, I gotta take advantage of sundress season while I still can! Thank you so much.
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/18 07:18 PM
2

Yeah, I was concerned it was just putting in too much effort way too soon. I just love cooking and I cook for my friends and family all the time, so I thought naturally it could extend to him but I don't wanna look overeager or anything. The popular consensus seems to be a picnic, but do you have any other 4th date ideas I could suggest to him? I was thinking going to a local concert might work too, or seeing something in theaters right now. But is it too masculine to suggest ideas for him? Mayb…
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/18 07:40 PM
2

Haha, at the end of the day you still fed his hungry stomach! Yeah, I'm really liking the picnic idea! Thanks for your help!
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/18 07:36 PM
2

Wow, thank you so much for all of the suggestions! Honestly I might just make that gourmet burger all for myself lol. I'll definitely be bookmarking most of these!
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/18 07:35 PM
1

Yeah, I think I'll either make or buy some simple finger foods! Thanks to the both of you!
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/18 07:34 PM
2

Yeah, I was afraid he was going to think that I'm trying too hard to prove myself as GF material. Thank you so much for your input! Do you have any recipe suggestions for a picnic dinner?
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/18 06:19 PM
7

Hm, you're right! I didn't even consider that it would come off as a tease! Thanks so much for the picnic suggestion! I'll definitely be thinking up some ideas for that.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/18 06:13 PM
1

Yeah, she definitely wants me checked for the same reason, lol. That's what I'd usually think too (her lying), but her boyfriends were hardcore betas. Esp because she dated them both in the height of #metoo, I feel like once she put her foot down these betas were not gonna try and do otherwise. Also, I fingered her and I could barely get 2 fingers in there, even though she was wet. She kept asking me to stop for a bit and then continue because it hurt her but she was still horny. I'm curious to …
/r/askTRP01/09/18 08:34 PM
1

I live in a big city and honestly, I've encountered many different types of girls. Yes, there are a lot more hypergamous women than there would be in a smaller city, but there are also a lot more reserved and conservative girls too. It's literally a numbers game. It also depends where you hang out. If you're finding girls at the club or at parties, can you really be surprised if the girls you meet are hypergamous and slutty? If you meet girls at volunteer events or church, of course you're deali…
/r/askTRP01/09/18 07:52 PM
1

Way too soon for you to be initiating talks about seeing her long-term. She knows you're inches away from being wrapped around her finger, and is consequently putting in way less effort.
/r/askTRP16/08/18 06:36 AM
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