TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

tellmemorelies Archive

View 0 posts and 96 comments by tellmemorelies on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Which province are you residents in? In Canada each province also has a piece of the financial pie so to speak. You also need to take a look at provincial laws that cover relationships to ensure you don't miss anything. Engaging a family lawyer in your province might be the best way to go. Take your time and look hard at your lawyer's list of reviewers and what they have to say. Canadian law is a fricken nightmare for divorce laws
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 12:47 AM
1

I agree to a point No matter what, you must keep aware of what is happening in your child's life, even if you are excluded from attending etc. Eventually that young person will look for you. If there are two or more children involved, they will talk about what they really remember, vs what they are "told Ito remember" IF YOU HAVE DEMONSTRATED BY ACTIONS, not just words that you followed their life, and truly wanted to be a part of it, those kids understood what a Dad was all about. At least mine…
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/26 03:36 AM
2

Daughter was 8 yrs old. Son was 12. Son got in contact with me when he was 15, daughter when she was 17.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 09:21 PM
7

Never give up on your children. I didn't see my daughter for nine years due to parental alienation. My daughter is now in her forties, has two children of her own, I see her and her family almost daily, and her Mother has never met the grandchildren who are approaching their teen years. Don't give up.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 01:13 AM
7

Only takes one to divorce, takes two to fix or make a relationship work. You can't do it by yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/26 12:27 PM
1

Over 30 years ago, this worked for me in my situation. Today the laws have changed to punish the father with less visitation, more alimony or less assets. Do this at your own risk, or get yourself a good honest lawyer who will tell you the truth about how a man gets screwed in family in the west and is able to give you advice accordingly.
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/26 09:21 PM
1

Time to get your lawyer to file the paperwork, going forward you need to limit conversation with her to divorce matters or children concerns. You are no longer her support system.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 02:30 PM
3

NAILED IT
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 03:31 AM
2

After a while, it becomes my new normal.... sick I know. I've been divorced from that train wreck for almost 30 years now. Our 2 children who are now adults with children of their own do not engage with her. She has never met her Grandchildren who are now teenagers.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 10:30 PM
1

I went further down the hole..... 9 DIFFERENT AFFAIR PARTNERS OVER 13 YEARS BEFORE I FINALLY HAD ENOUGH. PLEASE DON'T BE LIKE ME!
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 10:24 PM
2

Unfortunately it is normal. Look at the situation. The one person in the world that you thought was always in your corner with emotional, physical, and hopefully financial support and advice has basically told you in more words, but it boils down to "go fu$k yourself" cause you are on your own and she has got a new toy. You are devastated, feeling alone, abandoned unloved and probably unworthy. Been there and I have done that. You are at rock bottom or very close to it. Time to grab all that cra…
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 10:16 PM
2

I here you Bro...... but you really need to start putting one foot in front of the other and walking forward out of this emotional nightmare you are currently living. It will destroy you if you keep doing this. You are not alone, almost all of us on this sub have gone through something similar, some worse, some a little better, but we can all relate.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 10:06 PM
2

WTF? Why are you letting her control you? News flash - you are SOLELY in control of your own life, make your own decisions, and get some self respect starting to grow within you. Go to the gym. Lifting heavy things helps you work out ANGER, ANXIETY, and BUILDS SELF RESPECT. As a side bonus, you start to look and feel better physically. Get a lawyer. TODAY OR TOMORROW. NO LATER. Make a list of questions you need answers to ensure you come out of a divorce in the best possible shape financially an…
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 09:51 PM
12

I think you have posted in the wrong sub. Most here are on the other end of this situation and will have little, if any support for someone actively cheating on their marriage. Perhaps try r/adultery or some other sub.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 03:10 PM
6

It would be a shame if this phone was accidently dropped into a container of water now wouldn't it?
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/25 02:55 PM
1

It is a tough spot. You will need support and understanding from family and close friends. I was lucky enough to have a friend who went through similar circumstances with his WW, young children etc. I used the same language he used. Told everyone he couldn't get along with her new boyfriend. Also advised me to seek out therapy to help me and the kids adjust to this new life. Therapist helped with telling the kids the truth in an age appropriate way. As they got older they figured things out with…
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/25 12:31 PM
2

My ex told me the quickest way to get over a relationship, was to get under a new partner as soon as possible.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 11:54 AM
3

Oh yeah, she is completely off her rocker....... she is over 60 yrs old now, has no contact with our two grandchildren, in fact has never met them, and as far as I am aware is shacked up with a druggie. I haven't engaged in any way with her in over 25 years, life got a lot better once I went no contact.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/25 06:00 PM
10

This was over 3 decades ago with my ex, she also "demanded" I not tell anyone! I just looked at her and shook my head, didn't respond verbally. Later, when she realized I had told some members of my family, she went ballistic, calling my friends and whomever I told to "let them know she wasn't responsible for the marriage breakup" even though she was pregnant from another man. Cheaters have a very different reality than most people.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/25 03:22 PM
5

I have been in a similar situation with my kids and the ex. She wouldn't let the kids call me on my birthday, actually physically stopped them from calling me. When her birthday came around, my daughter asked if it was okay to call "Mom" and wish her a happy birthday...... I took the high road and actively encouraged her to make that birthday call. My daughter turns 40 yrs old in December, and still remembers this. Over the years their Mother/daughter relationship has slowly sunk down to almost …
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/25 12:07 PM
3

Happened to me, through my lawyer, we requested her medical records as well, she withdrew her request instead.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/25 04:03 AM
2

Any response should be a minimum of 24 hours later, unless this involves health and safety of the children. After 24 hours of thinking about a response, usually no response is the best answer, or the shortest response possible. Example ..... No. - this is a complete sentence.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/25 02:32 PM
4

Mine went into the nearest river. Like you, I paid around 1400.00 for it, but when I tried to sell it, there were very low offers, so I just threw it away, just like she did with our marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/25 02:49 PM
3

I put everything on a storage device, and when the children were adults I gave each of them a copy. I did not keep any photos hanging on the walls of the ex with or without myself and the children.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/25 10:49 PM
12

Just so you don't feel abandoned "You did it wrong" Just joking, as I constantly heard the same message from my ex!
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/25 10:15 PM
1

Wow, thanks for sharing this experience, really brought my similar situation into focus.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 05:25 PM
4

Nope, as a matter of fact I would even offer the poor guy a beer and a cigar, after all he took a lying cheating manipulating cheater off my hands and now he gets to deal with her craziness.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/25 02:32 AM
18

As the saying goes.... if they will cheat WITH you, they will cheat ON you.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/25 09:09 PM
7

Get your child some medical attention if needed, ensure the attack is documented somewhere.
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/24 08:22 PM
1

I have a similar story, won't get into the details as my story is from almost 25 years ago. Today my son is in his forties. My daughter just turned 39. My son hasn't seen or spoken to his mother in over a decade. He has two children of his own that his mother has never seen. My daughter is currently living with me. She has limited contact with her mother. She is much the same as your ex. She treated her children as accessories to be paraded around when it suited her. Then she would ignore them u…
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 03:28 PM
8

So she is a stay at home mom who has time to date other men while YOU WORK, and the kids are at school? Sounds like Mamma needs to be gainfully employed! Tell her to get a job, then go fuck her friends.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/24 03:41 PM
2

You remind me of a guy trying to push a rope along the ground. No matter how much you want to move things along, it just isn't going to happen at YOUR pace. The lady has told you she is not ready to date, so give it time, this isn't a sprint, but a marathon if you see a future with this woman. She does text you when you leave her alone, so she is showing some interest, don't be too impatient, let her figure you out. Be straightforward and honest, let your personality come through and she will se…
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/24 03:45 PM
3

I am a couple of decades past pulling the plug. My children are now in their late 30's with children of their own. My ex wife has never met her two grandchildren who are 10 and 7 yrs old. My kids told her to quit putting me down in front of them with others present - she almost always needs to "perform" for a crowd, and to her, three is a crowd. She wouldn't listen apparently, and after repeated attempts at diffusing this situation, first my son told her he had enough and a couple of years later…
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/24 07:30 PM
2

I got some great advice from my Father when I became a new Dad. He said "Did you notice when you got your new kitchen stove that it also came with a manual? Don't expect a manual with your new baby. It will be a learning process for you and the baby, but try and enjoy it, because it passes by very quickly." I've been a Grandpa for over a decade now, and I passed this knowledge on to my 2 adult children, who have come to understand this witty wisdom. Learn to be the best Dad you can be, but don't…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/24 02:15 PM
4

I'm going to be blunt here bro Reach down and pull your head out of your butt and stop being manipulated by your X. From what you have posted, you are giving her way too much info as to what is going on in your life and she is using this against you. Grey rock her and get your ass into therapy.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/24 01:31 AM
10

It took awhile before I would even think about someone else in a sexual way. Eventually my sexual desires came back, however I was much more interested in their actions and behaviors than how physically attractive I found her to be. Suddenly integrity, honesty and respect for others became some of the more important qualities that I was looking for.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/24 01:11 AM
6

If you are legally married to her and she has a new baby, you maybe considered the father and could be on the hook to support someone else's offspring. Considering she only knows the new BF for a short period of time and he dumps her, she may try and pin child support on you. Move forward with the divorce and extract yourself from this person.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 04:00 PM
3

Read this again OP Be prepared. Get your ducks in a row.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/24 09:30 PM
1

Bad to post, but good to share with your family law lawyer!
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/24 01:13 AM
6

A straight up cash transaction for a defined set amount upfront makes more sense than another costly divorce where the lawyers usually are the winners money wise.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/24 01:48 PM
9

I'm in the same boat, probably a little older than you, entering retirement and most of the women I have encountered in my age group are not the type of woman that I want to be with.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/24 01:29 PM
12

I got together with my now ex wife when her son was a couple of months old. I legally adopted him, and when he was 16 years old we separated and eventually divorced. My son wanted to live with me, which I was grateful for. He lived with me until he was 22 years old, then got his own place. He is now in his mid 40s, got married, has 2 awesome kids, is currently in the process of divorce and hasn't seen his bio mom in over a decade. We have a great relationship and I am so lucky to have him and th…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 05:47 PM
11

How often do we hear this, or something similar from women: "To get over someone, get under someone else."
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/24 12:40 PM
9

4 guys in 6 weeks, then says she regrets it? Is the regret after #1 or #4? Google gaslighting!
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/24 07:13 PM
5

probably a$$ hole.....
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 11:29 PM
4

You may be correct about your relationship with your daughter, but not all are the same. My ex took the path of false abuse charges, even accusing me of sexual abusing my then 12 year old daughter. As a result, I spent thousands of dollars trying to get access /visitation with my daughter over a period of several years. I finally had to give up as I ran out of money to fight this. 9 years later my daughter is almost 21 and curiosity about me got the best of her and she contacted me online. It wa…
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/24 03:46 PM
3

When I separated I went to a friend's mobile home, where I slept on his couch for 3 months while I got my poop in a group. Then rented a cheap apartment in a questionable neighborhood for another year before being able to get back on my feet. It was rough, but I couldn't stay in the home as she filed false abuse charges that were later thrown out of court.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 07:39 PM
3

Do not ever give more than you are legally obligated to give. If roles were reversed, do you honestly believe she would "give" you anything?
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/24 10:44 PM
2

I would never marry again. Been through the wringer a couple of times, had the T shirts and had to give them away in divorce. Never again.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/24 02:18 AM
3

Depending on your location, the certificate or duplicate may be required during the separation/divorce proceedings.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 11:01 PM
4

I'll echo what others have said, consult a lawyer prior to any confrontation with the cheater. Start to gather important documents (birth certs, marriage license, etc.) and get them in a safe place that the cheater cannot get to them. Separate your finances. Cancel any joint credit cards, set up a bank account only you have access to, take half of the savings and deposit into this account.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 09:44 PM
1

Yes. I was married for 13 years. Divorced almost 30 years.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 04:14 PM
13

I'm 62, single and loving it. I have 2 adult children who are in their late thirties with families of their own, who have mentioned I would be welcomed with open arms if/when I become unable to look after myself. Much better than holding onto a unhealthy, toxic relationship in my opinion.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 02:32 AM
4

LOL, have faith. I'm in my mid 60s and just got approached by a 38 year old woman. I declined as my oldest son is older than her. But it did my ego some good!
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/24 04:44 PM
14

Unfortunately it is typical. I would hazard a guess that almost all of us on this sub have probably heard this, or something similar. They never want to be the bad guy in their own story.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 09:30 PM
0

Just like there are good mechanics and bad mechanics there are good therapists and bad therapists. A person needs to vet or interview the therapist to ensure they have the proper qualifications and experience to be able to help with the given situation. This means as a potential client, a person needs to understand what kind of a therapist they require to assist with the problem at hand. This means the client needs to do some self assessment, research and then start interviewing potential therap…
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 04:45 AM
11

Many don't see marriage as a viable option.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 05:07 PM
2

My advice is to remember that this is now a business transaction. Keep emotions out of it. No anger, no being a "nice guy", no crying or feeling sorry for her. Don't take advantage, and don't offer to do more, or to do less. Be strong and ensure you get your fair share, for you and your children.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 08:41 PM
7

This is the way Op. Marriage is for being the nice guy (only up to a point) Divorce is a business decision
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 12:47 AM
3

I will join the others saying to divorce NOW. Firstly, what exactly has she done to repair the damage that was done to the relationship with her actions and behaviors during the affair? Has she started individual therapy with a therapist who has experience dealing with infidelity? Is this therapist "holding her feet to the fire" so to speak? Is she actively trying to establish why she had the affair, and more importantly fixing those "whys" to ensure there isn't a repeat performance? If she does…
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 06:55 PM
5

I was shocked. Prior to divorce, I was financially struggling, she was a SAHM, we were trying to manage on my income. Post divorce, even after paying spousal support and child support, I found I still had some $$, even thou I kept the house and had to get a second mortgage to pay her share. It is obvious, at least to me, that her spending was out of control.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/23 06:35 PM
2

She wants to meet up but won't disclose the topic of discussion? As you are probably aware, divorce has to be handled like a business decision, emotions need to be excluded as much as possible. Knowing this, would you attend a business meeting without any knowledge of the topic of the meeting? Probably not. I would not engage in this situation. Just my 2 cents worth.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/23 03:47 PM
1

Might be an issue for some. I couldn't do it, kept picturing her and the AP together. It sort of killed the mood if you know what I mean.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 11:09 PM
6

How can I upvote this twice? Good job.
/r/Divorce_Men15/11/23 02:17 AM
21

Get the divorce done first. Protect yourself and your children first, then help others. Keep some form of evidence to share with APs wife. When the ink is on the divorce decree, let the OBS know.
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/23 07:40 PM
1

Because I will not get remarried - full stop.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/23 04:38 PM
10

I went through much the same thing over 25 years ago. Ensure you keep any court documents, or other evidence of the parental alienation. At some point your Adult children will likely come looking for you. Mine did, at first they came to me to give me a "piece of their mind" about how I was a terrible father. Once they had read the evidence I had kept, they at first could not believe it, however there was a mountain of it, and could not be denied. Today my children and my grandchildren are in my …
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/23 01:59 PM
10

I did tell my now 42 year old son to take time and ensure he really wanted to get married. He went ahead with the marriage that lasted 3 years, with no children from that relationship, thankfully. The divorce wasn't that messy, but of course the emotional fallout was difficult for both of them. He then got into a common law relationship that lasted 8 years and produced 2 children. This one ended with infidelity on her part. His view of relationships has changed radically throughout the years. He…
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/23 04:56 PM
25

Had a similar situation. She claimed I was crazy and abusive. I just told anyone who asked, that I could not get along with her new boyfriend. Those that could add one plus one soon figured things out. Those that could not figure out simple mathematics I chose not to have in my life.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 04:22 AM
2

She asked for time to think about if she wants her bf or me. Do her a favor, help her make the choice, tell her you are no longer an option. She can go hang out with the bf
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/23 12:06 AM
14

If the tables were turned, do you think you would be shown any type of sympathy by her?
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/23 09:36 PM
1

I see. tough spot. Any chance you can use the stock as possible collateral for a loan?
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 11:40 PM
1

(not sure the value of my stock yet). Sell some stock and hire a lawyer. It will save you $$$$ in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 09:34 PM
1

Awesome update Get this done, and go live your best life. Happy for you Dude.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/23 05:22 PM
1

Start the divorce proceedings, have her served. If She is not serious about divorce, this will force her hand, if she is serious, you will know very quickly. Divorce takes a long time, and at any point you can slow down the process, or push it harder, depending on the circumstances. Personally I wouldn't waste any more time.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/23 04:52 PM
5

If you have no formal agreement on paper, don't be a bit surprised if further down the road, when you or her get into another relationship things turn sour. If this occurs you have nothing to protect yourself or your child. Hope it works out for you OP.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 12:13 AM
2

Yes, I'm from Cowtown. Feel free to message me
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/22 02:28 AM
2

It seems to me, that 5 grand will buy you exactly what you are wanting. Is your peace of mind worth it? I say it is.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/22 05:51 PM
1

Dude, you need legal advice from a professional. Time to see a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/22 05:39 PM
5

Stick to the written agreement. If it isn't suitable to her, then it can be updated, there is a process for her to follow as well as for you. Do not deviate from the agreement, once you do, it can then become the way it is if you refuse in the future she can claim that "we have been doing this since X date" in court and you may be stuck with it forever.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/22 09:31 PM
5

Don't do it. Check out www.survivinginfidelity.com Call suicide hotline at 833-456-4566
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/22 04:27 PM
1

It is not uncontested any longer. You need legal advice from a lawyer before you make any moves, or like you say you will get screwed over big time.
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/22 06:13 PM
3

My ex tried the same crap. "Nobody needs to know our business" I usually responded with "It's not my job to keep your dirty little secrets. If you don't want anyone to know, perhaps you should not engage in these activities" That usually shut her up and pissed her off all in less than a minute.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/22 04:54 PM
1

Wayward Wife - a term from r/survivinginfidelity
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/21 04:30 PM
1

2 books I re - read to help keep me going. No more Mr. nice guy. Lose a cheater, gain a life.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/21 04:00 PM
2

A lot of this depends on the particulars of your situation. Consult a lawyer to get an understanding of what your legal rights are, as well as what her legal rights are. Get professional advice to help you protect your rights.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/21 03:56 PM
35

I have now been separated since 1998. At that time I had been married for 17 years. My Son, who was 16 years old then came with me, he could not stay with his Mother. My Daughter who was 13 years old stayed with the WW. WW did all the dirty tricks during separation and divorce, including false domestic abuse charges, child alienation with my daughter for 9 damn years. I spent hundreds of thousands of dollars defending myself and attempting to get visitation with my daughter. WW did every dirty t…
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/21 03:49 PM
1

This marriage is done bud. Let her play with her friends, you must concentrate on divorce and getting the best possible deal for yourself. Keep her distracted and get the papers signed ASAP
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/21 04:08 AM
2

Some general info. I would contact a lawyer to get all the particulars in your situation dealt with. https://www.separation.ca/family-law/common-law/#:~:text=In%20Ontario%2C%20Canada%2C%20two%20people,living%20together%20for%20one%20year.
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/21 10:27 PM
2

What province are you in? Along with federal law, provincial law is also involved.
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/21 10:02 PM
2

Hey buddy, if you have legal questions, and home equity split is legal, see a lawyer. Everyone's situation is slightly different, particulars are different and locations are different. Get legal advice from professionals, not reddit.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/21 02:35 AM
1

In most provinces in Canada it is tied directly to your income tax return, and usually you must submit this annually to the maintenance enforcement agency for your province/area.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/20 09:36 PM
6

My wife of 4 years has been telling me for the past 6 months that the Lord is telling her to be with another man. Well, then it is only right that you agree with the "lord" and let her have what she wants.... but not as your wife. Get your ass to a lawyer's office today, and find out what a divorce looks like in your particular situation. File for divorce and serve her papers so she can show her "lord" that she is making progress on this front. Kick this useless bitch to the curb today.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/20 09:02 PM
2

Sorry buddy. It is not that I was trying to make you feel worse, its that these cheaters almost always play the same shitty game. I know, because I was once in shoes like yours. Some of the details are slightly different, but the main theme is almost exactly the same. Hope you can get yourself out of this mess.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/20 02:00 AM
1

My question is: If by some insane chance things petered out /w this asshole and she decides to stay, would any of you accept at this point? If it meant you could see your child every day, would you swallow your pride and do it? Why is it her decision to go or stay? In my mind, she made her decision when she fucked this other guy. She is just using you until her relationship with this other dude gets stronger. Let me guess, you pay the majority of the expenses, while she uses her money to finance…
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/20 07:05 PM
2

Not in my case, however in a close family member's case he is doing just that. From the info that I have, he has been seeing her as a FWB for about 4 months now. They have been divorced for over 3 years with 2 children under 10 yrs old. He has told me that he is not going to rush into anything with her. She had a affair that led to the end of the marriage. It will be interesting to see where this goes for him.
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/20 02:59 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter