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View 3 posts and 41 comments by the_last_0ne on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
10

Courtthe_last_0ne/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 03:50 AM
5

Living Situationsthe_last_0ne/r/Divorce_Men11/07/26 02:17 PM
4

Lawyersthe_last_0ne/r/Divorce_Men09/07/26 06:03 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

Thanks man and good advice. I lost 10 lbs the first 2 weeks, I was just in a panic attack all day every day and couldnt eat anything. My therapist had me go to the movies to get out and it took me 2 hours to eat a chicken sandwich and two fries, a bite every ten or fifteen minutes. Doing better now... I have therapy 12 hours a week through 3 providers and its helping a lot. I just cant stop being depressed about how much money im going to give her... I make about 3x what she does. It'll be like …
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/26 01:03 AM
2

Yeah we are going to try and settle but if things so far are any indication, she's not going to be anywhere reasonable. She would be able to buy out my half of the equity in the house with all of the money she gets from my retirement and investments, and she could afford the payments with alimony. Im gonna think on it though. Appreciate your view. I might actually be better off keeping a decent chunk of investments and renting somewhere, I could save a down payment in a year or two and get into …
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/26 08:51 PM
2

Holy shit this is exactly the kind of thing I was hoping to find, thank you for this! I could absolutely print out years of texts that show a normal relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/26 08:48 PM
1

I am going to fight tooth and nail... all I want is the house even if it means she gets all of my retirement and investments. She's gping to get over 50% of everything anyway.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/26 04:02 PM
2

My problem is I have like a 2.6% rate... and I've invested so much in this house, literally built the whole second floor myself, removed walls, moved the basement stairs... in the garage is my woodshop and a golf sim. Ill probably be paying her alimony so I would likely not be able to afford a house like this or even find one for a similar price. Plus id be paying way more even for something similar because rates are more than double my current rate.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/26 04:01 PM
1

No its a lot, and spread put across several filings. We each have a child from a previous relationship: they are 21 and 22. She claimed in an emergency sole possession of the house that she has 2 emancipated children from a prior relationship who need housing. She claims whete she is living makes it a one hour drive to her jobsite despite working from home. And so on. 10 out of 14 claims in that doc alone are false and easily disproveable. Maybe not bad enough for a judge to do something but if …
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 07:57 PM
1

Yeah, so many crazy things. Like why isnt a PFA mutual? Anyway thanks for the sympathy, its good to hear.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 07:02 PM
2

Im all good. I didnt mention myself and where im at because it isnt relevant to my question, but I guess everyone assumes the worst. Thats what I get for going to reddit I guess.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 06:00 PM
1

I am. Lawyers were after: it was literally the night she told me (via email) about having an attorney and filing. I lost it for a couple days. On track and in contril now. I'm not trying to punish her, and im letting my lawyers do their thing. I just wanted to see if anyone has any experience with this, because my lawyers are (very disappointingly) telling me that even though she signed papers swearing under oath under penalty of law that everything in there is true, it wont matter and the court…
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 05:59 PM
2

Yeah Ive accepted that I may lose the dogs, best case is probably some concessions from her when assets are split. I got a puppy Saturday. Its clear she is going to drag this out as long as possible so by the time I would even see them again it'll be 2 years off. All contact is already off. Blocked numbers, etc. I have my shit together now, I just didnt go into it because it wasnt relevant to my question. Im disappointed in all of replies assuming Im a fucking out of control angry wreck or whate…
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 05:54 PM
1

Yeah he does. But I have a criminal lawyer working with him as well who will be representing me for the PFA. Ive already got my shit together. Im honestly a little shocked at all the replies telling me im an asshole, not taking responsibility, etc. Not the support I expected from a community like this. I left out what Ive been doing because it isnt relevant to my question. They are all blocked and I have no desire to contact anyone anyhow. Im in an IOP 10 hours a week and an additional hour of t…
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 05:50 PM
-2

Dude, I have myself under control. I guess you think its so awesome that men get told they are the problem that you decided to keep it going yourself? The PFA violation was the same night I was served it: it was a text message to her brothers and dad saying "STBX is spreading lies about me. Can you please ask her if we can be civil and honest. I will not stoop to that level just because we are divorcing". I missed in the paperwork where it said no third party contact: Im on leave from work becau…
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 12:50 PM
-2

An incident. Not a pattern. At a moment where I am already on leave from work due to my mental state. Ive got no contact covered. How would you feel if, during your divorce, someone said "all of this is your fault"? I dont need sympathy but fuck you for deciding to post here and tell me Im the only problem.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 12:12 PM
-2

Lol thanks asshole. My wife got us thrown out of therapy. I have been in therapy individually for years and recently started an IOP which is 10 hours a week. Ive been in a program for AUD since January. I dont have an anger problem, I just lost my shit when she filed without a word beforehand and claimed she couldnt afford anything on an 80k salary when im still paying her car insurance, health insurance, and she has no rent or utilities and on STD at 60% of my salary. I take full responsibility…
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 11:28 AM
3

Thank you for this. Im done reacting, already spend 9 hours in jail for stupidly violating a temporary PFA. Been on leave from work as well since I cant focus or male decisions. Dogs already fucked me: she has them and wont let me see them, and now claiming one as an emotional support dog. I havent been without a dog in 35 years... My goal is to get the house and offer money up front to avoid alimony. Just wondering if there is a strategy that works to counter her lies.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 05:37 AM
2

I mean, thats exactly why I asked. Thank you for knocking some sense into me.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 05:29 AM
1

I cant help you but id recommend you find a local lawyer, not just one in the state. Someone local will know the judges, will know the opposing counsel, etc, and that makes a huge difference in how you go about some things.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/26 02:01 AM
7

Find a therapist and a psychiatrist. Get as much help as you feel comfortable with for now, they can give you tools to deal with it. You can drop it whenever you feel ready. My STBX filed a PFA against me with all kinds of crazy allegations. I was in a panic attack for two weeks straight, from waking to (not really) sleeping. I have 3 different anxiety meds now and have therapy for 11 hours a week. It really does help a ton.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/26 09:09 PM
5

Yes, you definitely have a holier than thou thing going on. Good luck out there. It sounds like you went through a lot, maybe you should stand alongside other men going through similar things instead of coming here vaguely insinuating that tons of them dont care about their kids at all.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/26 07:51 PM
3

So, you didnt go through a divorce yourself? And, are you advocating for people to stay in a bad marriage for the kids? If not then what exactly is your point? You ignored these questions from me. "Pray tell"... ok You come across as condescending, holier than thou, and completely dismissive of the myriad factors that can be different for every person. Who knows how the kids will be better off? Certainly not you. What % of people do you think just "give up and let a guy in a robe decide" or howe…
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/26 07:45 PM
3

What point are you trying to make here? That people should stay in a bad marriage for the sake of the kids? I doubt your attitude is going to get much sympathy here. Did you go through a divorce yourself or are you just out to insult other people?
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/26 07:35 PM
11

Basically the same exact thing here. I ended up getting blackout drunk every night last year to avoid her. Got sober in January and we had couples therapy until the therapist said she couldnt make any progress with us until my wife was able to take responsibility for herself and stop trying to manipulate people. We both have depression and anxiety. Mine is particularly severe right now. I was so used to letting her have her wsy that when we were separated, I had accepted it was going to end in d…
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/26 11:22 PM
2

Good on you for making a really tough decision. It likely wont be as bad as you think it will: thats generally how things work out. I stuck myself in a shitty marriage for years because I thought thats just what you do. Even after she moved out and I realized with my therapist that I would be happier with a divorce, I still just waited for her to talk to me. As is typical it seems, she never asked me to talk about divorce, as I thought she would after 15 years. Instead she got a lawyer and deman…
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/26 04:37 AM
2

Fucking hell this hits close to home. My wife always "cared about happiness, not money". I begged her to go back to school but she didnt want to. Never saved for retirement because she has some genetic stuff and she's convinced she will die in her 50s. Now she makes 75k but is demanding I pay her rent and legal fees during the divorce. Accused me of sexual abuse, trying to kill our pets, and a load of other stuff. Got a PFA against me. Tried to file for emergency sole possession of the house eve…
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/26 10:05 AM
3

What my therapist and I are working on is healing me. Working out, hobbies, etc arent things you do to impress a girl, they are things you do to make yourself a better person. Working out will help your mental state as well as your physical body. Hobbies keep you busy and distract you, and maybe you can find something you absolutely love to do. Hope is not going to come overnight, it will come with time and with work. Thats why people talk about healing, because as long as you keep looking back …
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/26 12:34 AM
1

Yeah thats the situation im in.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/26 04:31 PM
1

You need to ask a lawyer dude
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/26 04:28 PM
1

Thats going to be so different for everyone. Our kids are on their early 20s so I dont have to worry about custody or child support. Thank God. We each had a child from a prior relationship. Her son is totally poisoned against me, just repeating all the lies she makes up, etc. My daughter asked to please not get pulled into the middle of it so she can preserve her relationship with him. So for me, in terms of the kids, the hardest part was allowing her to do that. She's even taken a few of my wi…
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/26 12:01 PM
1

That is exactly what happened to me. I just always thought this was what marriage is, and thats that. Divorce never even crossed my mind.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/26 01:08 AM
1

Same. Giving yourself permission to cry feels really good. Let it all out man.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/26 12:48 AM
2

Same here. Im just getting started but that was one of my biggest complaints in couples therapy, that she blames me for everything. The therapist stopped having us come because the wife couldnt take any responsibility for herself. She's now refusing to sign releases for the therapists notes lol, so we will subpoena them. Had a session with her this week and she 100% believes my wife was emotionally abusing me for years, it will be in her notes.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 11:37 PM
2

Mine did something similar. We were separated and she has always sent me money for bills based on our income ratio. When she told me she filed she also said she wouldnt be giving me money for bills any more. I removed her from everything except car and health insurance. When I said in an email "if you arent paying bills I will remove you from all services" she said "dont threaten me". Then she asked if I could please wait while she figured out cell phones and stuff. No, actually I will not wait.…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 11:28 PM
1

Mine did something similar. We were separated and she has always sent me money for bills based on our income ratio. When she told me she filed she also said she wouldnt be giving me money for bills any more. I removed her from everything except car and health insurance. When I said in an email "if you arent paying bills I will remove you from all services" she said "dont threaten me". Then she asked if I could please wait while she figured out cell phones and stuff. No, actually I will not wait.…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 11:28 PM
1

I was never taught how to identify or deal with emotions as a kid. Wife was emotionally abusing me for years and I just thiught that was what a marriage was like. Last year I drank more and more until eventually just blacked out every night so I could avoid her. Ive been seeing a therapist for years and she led me to realize the abuse around November. She said she saw it for a while but needed me to come around to it instead of her telling me. I started a program for drinking in January, we star…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 11:16 PM
1

There are cases where it is a concern. My wife voluntarily moved out when we separated. After she (surprise!) filed for divorce, she immediately hit me with a pfa and tried to get an emergency sole possession order (denied). Because of the pfa, I cannot go to where shi lives or works (not that I would want to). If I left the home for an extended period of time and she moved back in, since she legally owns 50% of it, I would have to find new housing now. I would still have 50% of it but I need to…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 10:56 PM
2

Some people are just hateful. Just started my divorce and my wife will not let me see our dogs at all, she is now claiming they are her 'emotional support dogs'. Im sure they miss me like crazy.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 07:11 PM
1

Yes exactly. Her son's dad sent me an incredibly nasty email about all the things she said I did. She also told my sister in law who she hates and hasn't spoken to in a year. She's just working through the list trying to pull everyone over to her side. Not going to play that game: if people really think I was raping her and dont even come get my side of the story they can fuck off. Im not saying shit about her except to my therapist and my lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 03:24 PM
2

Dude I just got served papers 2 weeks ago but im in the same boat as you. I have actually been on leave from work since she moved out during to extreme depression and anxiety (which was here prior but obviously got 100x worse when she told me she had a lawyer and was going to stop paying any of our bills). My therapist has been incredibly helpful: if you dont have one, get one. They will listen to whatever you want to say and offer helpful advice. Anyway we are working on tiny things. She had me…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 11:53 AM
1

Dude. Between my wife and her son, they called the cops 11 times in 3 days on me. Im legit traumatized: I still (only 2 weeks ago) keep looking out the window and expecting cops to show up to arrest me for something else dumb. I was dumb and lost my shit, but all good now. Ive been on leave from work since we separated, im probably more fragile now than I have ever been in my life. Her and her son texted my whole family telling them shit, to the point where my younger brother called me and said …
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/26 02:49 AM
1

Thanks. I have accepted all of it: youre not being rude, it just is what it is. My lawyer said since the dogs are considered marital property just like a bed or table or whatever, theres no mechanism for a court order for shared custody or anything like that. I just have to wait until assets are divided. It took me one day to see how she was trying to paint me as the bad guy. Its just crazy how you can spend years with someone and they turn on you like this. I hired a lawyer finally yesterday an…
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/26 10:34 PM
3

Hey man: I am also in the early stages of a veey messy divorce. My wife was abusing me for years and I didn't even register it. She blamed me for everything and I just thought I must be a piece of shit. . The divorce isnt only your fault. Whatever happened happened to both of you during the marriage. Even in the eyes of the law it was mutual. You deserve better than her. Who cares if she is seeing someone,: you can too.
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/26 07:14 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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