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these_things_change Archive

View 4 posts and 56 comments by these_things_change on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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21

yeah dude redpill is really all about having a lot of insecurity and low self esteem, nobody that feels good ab themselves does redpill
/r/ExRedPill29/11/21 10:39 PM
2

dude I’m w you, I don’t understand this cuck culture, like maybe I’m just not evolved enough to not get really fucking upset thinking about my girl getting fucked by another man. maybe this is the future haha
/r/TheRedPill27/12/19 05:14 PM
-2

yeah no I get it, and I get why you used it, I just wanted to tell you that as a jewish man myself, hearing someone say “Jew Boy” sounds a lot like a racial slur
/r/TheRedPill26/11/19 02:43 PM
2

I mean I'm probably speaking from a defensive place, I probably use online dating as a buffer to not approach. Something I have to work on, I know. I feel pretty shitty about myself not approaching if I'm being completely honest.
/r/askTRP01/11/19 08:05 PM
1

lol can’t wait to learn fully X(
/r/askTRP01/11/19 07:47 PM
1

I see your point but also disagree based on my personal experiences
/r/askTRP01/11/19 07:46 PM
1

can you expand on why? She's a girl just like any other... I don't get this dichotomy, that girls met online are somehow "less than"
/r/askTRP01/11/19 07:13 PM
1

Thanks for the reply, you're right, I was too easy, not enough of a challenge. I'm definitely going to use this situation as an opportunity to grow and learn, definitely helps to have the input of this community and guys like you.
/r/askTRP01/11/19 06:22 PM
1

thank you for this advice, I know the power of physical exertion as a natural mood enhancer, I actually went to the gym the day she ended it and had my best lifting day in months. cardio always makes me feel bulletproof.
/r/askTRP01/11/19 03:34 PM
1

amen, I definitely learned for next time, thanks to all of you guys and your wisdom.
/r/askTRP01/11/19 03:22 PM
1

thanks for the perspective, I know I have some big things to improve on for my next go-around. I appreciate your critique, it all helps me improve.
/r/askTRP01/11/19 03:04 PM
1

sent her an email opening up about my thoughts and how I recognize I went wrong, took your advice on phrasing. Thank you. It is probably super beta, and probably won't do anything, but at least it's off my chest and I expressed myself fully. If she digs it, fine, if not, also fine. But at least she'll have my thoughts and I'll have expressed myself and told her everything I wanted to. On a side note, do you have any advice for me to help get over her? I know it's a logical fallacy to think she's…
/r/askTRP01/11/19 01:38 PM
1

so you think I should reach out? i’m not sure I can handle more contact and potentially more disappointment. i’m so sad over this girl and it hurts even more that it was me that fucked things over. but in my head I keep thinking that if I could just explain myself, if I could just make her see the real me, then she would take me back and this would all go away, but I feel like i’m just entertaining a fantasy and that she’s already moved on. idk what to do man.
/r/askTRP01/11/19 12:48 PM
1

saved this, thank you. some intense clarity right here. I know I fucked up, and this is finally telling me exactly how. You're absolutely right.
/r/askTRP01/11/19 05:17 AM
2

That sounds like what it was honestly, she told me a little bit about her past relationships where she wasn't happy, that people would just use her, and in my head I'm like, "How could she think that was me at all?" but it did seem like self-sabotage because of how good it could have been. I appreciate your sharing about that, out of anything this has sounded the most like what happened. It was really good, then it went completely south and she cut it off over text.
/r/askTRP01/11/19 12:03 AM
1

I'm both thankful for that as well as for this community, I was initially afraid of posting in here because I'd get railed for acting so beta but I got so much helpful insight from everyone. And it validates what I really knew to be true: there's nothing to do about it now other than take care of myself and keep up the fighting spirit, have faith that there are so many more women out there that will match up with me like she did, probably even better.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 09:29 PM
2

yeah and that makes sense to me, if she told me the truth, she might be in danger of me going crazy and doing something harmful to myself or her, it seems like an evolutionary mechanism to protect women, who are the physically weaker sex.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 09:25 PM
1

no, you're probably right, I'm definitely a self-diagnosed "nice guy", spent 5 years in a relationship where I was codependent and needy and beta as fuck, so I think I have to work on some of those characteristics. my whole thing w not being too lovey dovey was to try to not fall into familiar and shitty patterns. I definitely did derive validation from her, I felt more attractive and had more confidence knowing that she liked me so much. But I'm aware that really I should be giving that to myse…
/r/askTRP31/10/19 09:17 PM
1

thanks, I'm trying to be kind to myself, just taking this as a learning experience and moving on.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 09:12 PM
1

see, that's what I did, tried to instill dread, but that's what she said drove her away. super confusing, probably shouldn't take her at her word.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 09:11 PM
1

that's good to hear, i'm looking forward to that lol
/r/askTRP31/10/19 09:10 PM
1

she did initiate it, I hear you tho
/r/askTRP31/10/19 09:09 PM
3

dude that’s what I was thinking. if she went immediately nuclear then there’s something else going on and she doesn’t really value being with me. normal caring people would at least try and bring it up before that step. the incongruity is the thing that fucks me up.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 08:09 PM
2

LOL at wizard's sleeve. again, you're right. thank you.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 07:37 PM
2

thank you for this. I know i'm hamstering, just looking for validation. I'm hurt, and don't want it to be my fault. But the only thing to do is pick myself up, get back out there, and improve.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 07:36 PM
2

You're right, I ignored the material on TRP about LTR material. I glossed right over it and kept looking for "girls with daddy issues are fine". I ignored the warnings, ignored the advice on here. Never again. I have to learn from this and pay attention to flags and signs before fully investing in one person. I think I was just soooooo ready to LTR, and I ignored my gut.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 07:34 PM
1

I know, and I felt bad doing so. I just didn't know how to maintain my plates without occasionally fucking them, which felt wrong to me. Anyway, luckily I got one of my plates back and I'm gonna fuck the living hell out of her tonight to try to detach my sexual attachment to my ex.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 07:32 PM
4

thank you man, i'm gonna keep reading this. You're right, I tried!! I really left my best out there and was myself the best I could be. I'm just going to keep working on myself, keep improving, keep lifting, keep training BJJ, lose the gut, and choose to forgive myself. Thanks for your help
/r/askTRP31/10/19 07:31 PM
1

That's what I've been saying, like me opening up will just come with time, why rush it? It seemed like maybe she wanted to control me like she couldn't control her father. Or she was playing the field. Sucks to think about but SOMETHING had to be up, I don't think my radar is THAT broken.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 07:29 PM
5

i’m tearing up at work reading this, thank you for being so kind. you’re right, i’m human, I make mistakes, I learn, and I improve. there will be others, and i’ll make more mistakes, but i’ll keep getting better. thank you, this comment moved me. I appreciate it.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:47 PM
1

thanks for this, i’m hoping what i’ve learned over the past few days will just make me better. it’s hard to believe that right now, hell, it’s hard to think i’ll find someone like her again, but you just have to have faith, right?
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:45 PM
1

I absolutely did believe that. I knew I was doing it too. I need to fuck some more girls and get over this
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:43 PM
2

thanks for the input, I feel so much regret but this will help the next relationship. i’m in so deep with oneitis right now that I can’t even imagine there’s another girl that’s like her or better than her. I guess time will help. anyway, thank you.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:40 PM
2

thanks for this. I feel like shit losing her. but you’re right, I went too hard. I just want to go back and change things. but I guess I have to internalize that i’ll have another chance with another girl. easy to say before you’re in it, super hard to believe when you’re heartbroken. how did you figure out how to walk the line?
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:39 PM
2

makes MGTOW look attractive all of a sudden. or I guess just having my own fulfillment outside of females. I guess i’m still sad that the BP dream is just a dream. I don’t know if i’ve internalized that. I think I still hold out hope. fuck i’m sad.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:32 PM
4

sounds like the consensus, I hate how many games I have to play with this shit. you just really can’t relax at all can you? it’s a mindfuck to keep track of.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:27 PM
6

man how do I not allow that to fucking destroy my self esteem? how can one even hope for stability or loyalty?
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:25 PM
2

that’s what I was thinking, it was like witnessing the light switch turning off. like so fucking cold. like it was bullshit. fuck i’m hurting over this. what’s the point in even investing at all? the more you care and give love the more you hurt. and I want to care. I want to love. i’m still clinging to it. fuck me dude.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:23 PM
3

you think so? that makes me feel better. it just is so disheartening to know that there’s so much lying and subterfuge involved with women. it makes me feel like i’m not going to be able to hack it.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:21 PM
1

i’m so confused about what to do in the future, there’s so much conflicting advice on TRP, I was faking it until I made it but fucked it by being an amateur. i’m feeling pretty hopeless about ever being able to have a stable LTR. thanks for your input though, I appreciate it.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:19 PM
1

so you don’t think i’m crazy regarding that? the thing that made me think that was the cause was how quickly she went to break up mode, like instantly. like she’s used to men disappointing her. I willingly ignored that red flag. I was so cuntstruck. fuck.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:16 PM
3

I mean now I know how crazy that looks but when a girl says she wants you to herself and she’s the prettiest girl you’ve been with in a long time and she acts all affectionate how can I not believe the fable? I was unprepared. I feel like a dumbass. I want to believe the lie. I want to believe in a partner for me. I know I rushed in but it felt right, it felt natural. i’m so lost man.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:14 PM
5

I think that was definitely it, I was blinded by her affection and thought I wasn’t worthy so I did what I do with plates, which is to keep distance.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 06:09 PM
11

it’s all hindsight though, I wish I had the clarity of mind to keep it together in the moment. it’s so stressful, and intoxicating. fuck.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 05:17 PM
2

you’re right, I thought the STFU would have been communicating non-neediness, I guess I was wrong. this all makes me feel like it’s not worth the effort, or that i’ll never be the man that women desire. I want to be better. how do you not get crushed by the utter weight and implications of red pill truths? is a loving relationship just not possible? i’m so broken up over this shit. I thought someone understood me and chose me. it was so intoxicating.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 05:16 PM
15

look at myself hard, you’re so right. i’m already lifting about it and have a plate coming over tonight. man I feel like a fool tho. you’re absolutely right
/r/askTRP31/10/19 05:07 PM
1

so what do you think about my STFU and dread? was that too much on my end? or do you think it was a scapegoat so she could go swing?
/r/askTRP31/10/19 05:06 PM
5

thank you for beating me up, I deserve it, you’re absolutely right. I was immediately cuntstruck and threw all my logic out the window. I must want to revert to beta shit bad, I really wanted to just relax and live the dream. maybe believe that love exists and that fairy tales happen. thank you for your reply, this helps.
/r/askTRP31/10/19 05:05 PM
1

maybe set up more dates for the week? if you know you’ll have other chances for intimacy you might not feel like this one is the only chance you’ll have.
/r/askTRP10/10/18 07:40 PM
1

when you're right you're right, thanks for helping me see it clearer. and you're also right that my bigger problem is my liking her a lot. anyway i appreciate the help.
/r/askTRP01/02/18 05:50 AM
1

I’ll do this, it feels like I’m blowing it out of proportion and she’ll cool off in a day or two. I feel right now like texting her “thanks for coming by tn, I had fun” to reframe the situation but to me that sounds like a BP attempt at seeing if she’s mad or me trying to smooth out the situation which will probably lower my standing. probably better to just let it blow over, in my worst fears right now she will somehow be so mad that she will accuse me of rape or something, all this press about…
/r/askTRP01/02/18 05:42 AM
1

that’s what I’m thinking, hopefully she cools down, but you’re right that the teasing was perhaps heavy handed in that moment
/r/askTRP01/02/18 05:22 AM
1

thank you very much for all the info and the robust reply, I’ll check out that blog for more. I don’t know if it’s a blue-pill oneitis feeling for multiple women in my life or whether it’s feeling my relationships are too shallow, or maybe i’m more emotional than i realize, but the idea of deeper relationships interests me while I also cling to my newfound feeling of freedom while having access to intimacy. Polyamory may be for me, I don’t know if I can comfortably go to just one exclusive LTR a…
/r/askTRP31/01/18 04:54 PM
1

well that's the distinction, correct? between an FB and a MLTR like Rose does? I agree that one shouldn't become deeply entrenched in a fuck toy, but if you are interested in deepening the relationship I could see using emotional talk as a tool in doing so. Do you keep any plates around for a long time? do you have a "main plate"?
/r/askTRP31/01/18 01:13 PM
1

i see, this is interesting, perhaps I'm more inclined towards the MLTR's, like Rose does, it seems that would be more satisfying, having a deeper relationship with the girls you're seeing. In your case with MLTR's are you being explicit and telling the girls you're seeing others? or do you keep it ambiguous and implicit through your actions?
/r/askTRP31/01/18 01:11 PM
1

I keep my room way clean but only for my own pleasure, there’s a huge difference between coming home to a messy room and coming home to a tidy room, I’ve lived both ways and the tidy room brings me joy and peace of mind, whether a girl enjoys that or not is an added benefit but I’m the prize, I don’t need my room to impress a woman.
/r/TheRedPill27/11/17 02:54 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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