theytoldmeineedaname Archive

Upvotes	Title	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
6	Tone Down Over-The-Top Wit While Remaining Authentic?	theytoldmeineedaname	/r/seduction	27/01/20 06:50 AM
5	Dealing with looking much younger than my age (31 m)	theytoldmeineedaname	/r/seduction	25/10/22 10:41 PM
3	Some Notes on Early Progress	theytoldmeineedaname	/r/seduction	17/07/19 11:14 PM
2	Defusing the Jesterr	theytoldmeineedaname	/r/seduction	26/10/19 11:41 PM
1	How to set aside ego to pass shit tests?	theytoldmeineedaname	/r/TheRedPill	19/01/20 10:18 PM
0	Ever wonder about how almost no woman would be intimidating without makeup? Is there any way to leverage this?	theytoldmeineedaname	/r/seduction	01/02/20 04:42 AM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
6	How many women have you approached with romantic interest in the past year? Dude are you a literal ogre? That ratio is wildly off and you need someone to look into it and help you out.	/r/seduction	31/10/22 03:28 PM
2	How to respond to: “You can’t like a photo without starting a conversation” "Ma'am I believe I just did." It's cheeky enough and she'll despise the "ma'am"; you can take it from there.	/r/seduction	29/10/22 07:22 PM
16	What are some good ways to tease (by touch, or “make her melt”) a girl when you’re in a bar/pub/in general? There was a passage in Manson's book 'Models' in which he recounted the story of a massively awkward and unextraordinary dude who nevertheless did really well purely by being incredibly handsy with women he met in clubs. And he was also apparently quite clumsy with the execution, not following typical social cues or escalation patterns. Ever since I read that, I've aimed to touch more aggressively and observe what happens. And it turns out it's far and away the most powerful thing you can do to …	/r/seduction	26/10/22 05:20 PM
1	Dealing with looking much younger than my age (31 m) very easy for me to communicate with girls 18-20 years old, who consider me their generation A lot of people reading this who haven't experienced it wouldn't understand what you mean, but I totally get it. What I've discovered is that peoples' judgment of age is entirely based on appearance. I can tell someone I'm 31 and still get treated like I'm a decade younger. And I've seen the same thing happen to friends of mine who look younger too.	/r/seduction	26/10/22 06:14 AM
1	How do you minimise the chances of flaking before a date? You do need to check out. And, more importantly, you need to stop extrapolating from cherrypicked anecdata. We're wired with a strong negativity bias and you're over-indexing on the worst stories you're aware of because of it. This should go without saying, but you don't need to become a bad person in order to succeed with women. Sadly, that worthless nugget of anti-advice continues to circulate around this sub and refuses to die.	/r/seduction	24/10/22 01:35 AM
1	How do you minimise the chances of flaking before a date? Honestly your dating experience sounds irregular enough that I suspect there are some specific things you're getting very wrong. But, without observing you directly, I have no idea what those might be. I'd caution you against making any sweeping conclusions about women or dating. You do sound jaded and like you might be projecting that back out into the world (which is obviously a problem).	/r/seduction	24/10/22 12:42 AM
1	How do you minimise the chances of flaking before a date? You're missing at least two ingredients that will improve your situation: (1) Jealousy, (2) Abundance. More importantly, if your goal is a higher number of sexual experiences with a variety of women, you need to meet them where they are, on average, and not expect them to adjust to you. None of this bullshit about logical conversations or whatever. I'm rather like you in that regard, but you have to override that aspect of your personality if you want to succeed. Caveat: if you just want to find…	/r/seduction	23/10/22 07:15 PM
10	What to say when a woman mentions her weight or wanting to lose weight Most guys will say something like “well I like how you look” or “I don’t think you need to lose weight”. And…it’s a nice thing to hear I guess but also it feels a little…I dunno…judgy? Like, I didn’t ask your opinion. You are, categorically, socially retarded.	/r/seduction	20/10/22 05:52 AM
5	Anyone wear suits to meet women? The context matters. Wearing a suit to a coffee shop or a park or similar usually looks tacky. Wearing a suit to a classy lounge or restaurant can make sense. There are plenty of opportunities to do that in LA and NYC (and it's fairly common). What also matters is how you wear the suit. If it's a half canvas suit with poor fabric quality, low quality shirt with placket, tie, etc, you're going to look like a desk jockey. Wearing a suit "business style" is mostly unattractive. The right look is so…	/r/seduction	06/10/22 02:23 AM
4	Big guy advice Probably easier to define in terms of bodyfat %. Once you're sub 20, you're in a good place. If you get sub 15, you're golden. I prefer being a bit heavier myself, but erring towards muscle instead of fat. Too skinny and it's like you don't have enough 'presence'. Good luck my man. You've got this.	/r/seduction	25/08/22 02:59 AM
12	Big guy advice As a formerly overweight person who went through a wholesale body transformation, my advice would be: floor the accelerator on weight loss and muscle development (in fact, don't ever stop) and make as many female friends as possible in the interim, while you're still physically unattractive by conventional standards. Having a ton of female friends will pay huge dividends once you're fit. Other than that, work on anything else that can help develop you into a more attractive person like hobbies, …	/r/seduction	25/08/22 02:16 AM
3	Anybody turned shit around at 30 ? Unlikely. Any treatment that halts or reverses aging would probably also kickstart the processes that promote skin health and elasticity and also prevent atrophy of the facial skeleton. In any case, dermatology is making huge strides independent of longevity science. People would be surprised at how affordable it can be to preserve or improve your skin. There's a common misconception that access to those treatments is limited to celebrities or the wealthy.	/r/seduction	01/08/21 12:06 AM
6	Anybody turned shit around at 30 ? He might have phrased this poorly, but it's not too far off the mark. Better phrasing: "there is a distinct possibility that advances in longevity science will enable people under ~40-50 years old today to not die of biological aging, provided that they have enough wealth to afford the necessary treatments." Of course, this is still a weird thing to point out in a thread about seduction.	/r/seduction	31/07/21 09:23 PM
2	How do you all do it? Are you approaching women who are your peers in the looks department or have you become a high status male (through one of many routes available) who would be attractive to girls outside your league? Very strong chance your answer to both questions is no and that is why you’re here. You don’t need a strategy. You need to accept that you have to either put in effort to be a high status man or lower your standards.	/r/seduction	21/05/20 03:58 AM
1	How to act/become more masculine? Context-dependent. Use your best judgment. If the expectation is that you're having a one-on-one conversation, then looking bored could make you seem like an asshat. This is often good for group situations or after a girl has begun chasing you.	/r/seduction	12/02/20 10:11 PM
5	How to act/become more masculine? Strong eye contact, touch, genuine compliments, teasing, being sexually suggestive (whispering dirty things in her ear and then carrying on like it didn’t happen is a solid move on a date), deep slow voice, listening well and being interested in her story, confident body language. Most important by far: escalation. You escalate by progressing your touch, asking her out after the initial approach, moving her around if you’re at a venue, kissing her on a date, inviting her back home after a date, …	/r/seduction	07/02/20 07:18 AM
–	How to act/become more masculine? Having a baby face means you can hit on younger girls. That's hardly a disadvantage (unless you're 18 or close to it). Slow down your movements and your speech, have a solid walk, aim to be upright and comfortable in your posture whenever you're stationary. Don't invest too much with your body language. If you're not looking at someone directly while talking/listening, then effect an air of being bored or spaced out. I have a wittiness "problem" too and the easiest way to deal with it is to slow…	/r/seduction	06/02/20 08:29 PM
2	Am I the guy that just "Gets It" This exactly. I've long suspected that girls even have a preference for guys who don't adhere to some bland alpha stereotype. The problem is usually not 'betaness' but rather that such men won't express their sexual attraction. Once that's cured, it's off to the races. I consider my personality nerdy/weird/playful and I feel like it's a huge advantage.	/r/seduction	05/02/20 06:34 AM
2	What is like to date a 19 year old girl as a guy in his mid 30s? Have you guys done it before? %2 has a distinct meaning in discrete math/computing ("modulo 2"), so your mistake is even more egregious than you realize.	/r/seduction	05/02/20 06:16 AM
2	Subway game and FR "Would you like to go out some time?" If she says "yes", you have your opening to follow her off the train. Simple. Sounds like you know better now though. It's the kind of mistake you only have to make once. Great FR.	/r/seduction	05/02/20 06:11 AM
22	They're just people. You haven't spent enough time here and you don't understand what seduction is. 'Tips and tricks' is a puerile, reductive description of the practice. In its highest form, seduction is a state of being that flows naturally without much conscious thought. But you don't get there without concerted effort and a lot of pain. You're welcome to dispute whether it's worthwhile to learn it, but disputing the effectiveness of it is absolutely ridiculous. Especially so if you haven't found a viable alterna…	/r/seduction	05/02/20 02:26 AM
1	Would you reject love just to game? Sunk cost fallacy is real. People getting confused by love and picking the wrong partner is exactly how you waste years of your life in a relationship that ends in tragedy. Objectivity is essential.	/r/seduction	04/02/20 07:41 PM
3	Guys who are highly successful with women, was it always that way for you? My favorite is 'How To Make Girls Chase' by Chase Amante. It's a comprehensive instruction manual that covers all the essentials. Quite a long read, in fact. Amante is also of a logical/scientific bent and that's reflected in his work. No one has managed to take a fully empirical approach to seduction so far but he gets closer than most, in my opinion.	/r/seduction	04/02/20 09:15 AM
3	I feel like it's quantity over quality. Instead of aimlessly having to talk for 2 minutes at a time to many different women, what's the best activities which allow you to have long conversations with women? Dating	/r/seduction	04/02/20 08:31 AM
6	Guys who are highly successful with women, was it always that way for you? Totally fair and a no less noble objective. Agreed about quick lays too. Sex with a familiar girl is usually better.	/r/seduction	04/02/20 08:27 AM
17	Guys who are highly successful with women, was it always that way for you? Slept with maybe close to 80 women last year You're completely full of shit. In r/bigdickproblems (lol?), you estimated your lifetime count at "40 plus", 4 months ago: I’ve had only 2 not be able to take it and I’ve been with 40 plus. But I’m crazy and I attract bat shit crazy women who are usually into pain so it evens out. You also posted this around the middle of last year: Kinda cautious to post this on my main account but fuck it lol. 7 month ago I had very low confidence and was freshly si…	/r/seduction	04/02/20 08:10 AM
–	Would you reject love just to game? Making that call on the basis of emotions and nebulous feelings about her would be downright stupid. You should know what you want in a girl and you should also screen for red flags. Be objective. If she doesn't fit the profile of your ideal LTR, then you next her, no matter how much you believe you love her now.	/r/seduction	04/02/20 07:32 AM
1	A chick with a boyfriend is interested in me? It's not the dude talking you have to worry about.	/r/seduction	02/02/20 05:44 AM
5	Brutal approach. Lesson learned: to keep being myself. Some people will hate me, and some people will love me. Why did you immediately sit at the table if everything about her body language screamed that she was in an unreceptive mood? Seems like doing the open while standing would have been preferable in this case, and you could have then taken a seat if she hooked. Put yourself in her shoes. She might have had her bitch shield up because of some shitty experience earlier in her day. And then some random jackoff comes over and has the temerity to just plop himself down at her table without any preamble.…	/r/seduction	02/02/20 04:28 AM
1	Is approaching in the day frowned upon nowadays? It's all about how you execute. If you do it right (e.g. start with a compliment), your attempt could end up being the highlight of a girl's day. They really appreciate it when a guy is genuine about his intentions, offers a compliment, and respects their boundaries if they're not interested. And it's easy to do all of that. Also, having talked with girls about it, they're desperate for guys to approach them in-person now more than ever. Because it rarely happens anymore. And especially (ironica…	/r/seduction	01/02/20 05:56 AM
–	Should I tell him he’s the best guy I’ve ever dated? It's really depressing that it sounds like you've found something real and potentially meaningful but are hesitating to express yourself authentically. Don't play games. Put your heart on the line and be true to yourself if you found someone you think is worth being with. This is also in your interest because it would be better to have your heart broken sooner rather than later if the real you is incompatible with the real him. You can't know that if you're pretending to be someone else. If you …	/r/seduction	01/02/20 05:27 AM
–	Advice for FOB Indian in the US Your story isn't that different from anyone else's. Be brutally honest with yourself about what girls might find unattractive and fix it. If you're in a major city, being Indian won't be a huge penalty, if you make yourself as attractive as possible in every other way. One of my best friends is Indian (who grew up in the US) and does extremely well because he's 'exotic' looking - i.e. doesn't look like the majority of men girls here see throughout their lifetimes. It sounds like you could benefi…	/r/seduction	01/02/20 05:14 AM
2	Tone Down Over-The-Top Wit While Remaining Authentic? Fair enough. I'm reasonably sure I don't clown around. People are almost always laughing at what I say, not at me personally. My humor is never farcical or slapstick. I think the risk I worry about is being too self-involved with my own humor. It sometimes feels like a competition, as if I'm trying to one-up every other guy around me. Another commenter used the word "insecurity" and that got me thinking about that possibility. That's also what I meant by 'least effort' - putting in a lot of effo…	/r/seduction	28/01/20 03:33 AM
1	Tone Down Over-The-Top Wit While Remaining Authentic? My bad. This is a bit hard to describe. I edited the question and added more context.	/r/seduction	27/01/20 10:00 AM
1	Why are so many dudes on here setting a date limit before they get sex? This exactly. More concisely: never reward women who are playing a game by withholding sex and never pursue women for whom you aren't a fuck yes (they decide this within minutes of meeting you). A relationship isn't worth having if the sexual attraction isn't really strong at the outset. She should be desperate to have you fuck her brains out. If not, move on and do better next time.	/r/seduction	27/01/20 08:06 AM
2	Things I've learned about women. I think a lot of people read "AWALT" in a perfectly literal sense and are offended by me calling it a "lie". They might think I'm saying that because I'm trying to discredit the TRP sexual strategy. But really it's cut and dry logic. It's extremely difficult for any such absolute statement to be true because you only need a single counterexample to disprove it. Some might even argue that the only thing that is absolutely true is that there is no such thing as absolute truth <- mind-bender. Howev…	/r/TheRedPill	21/01/20 05:22 PM
2	Things I've learned about women. I would have thought that's obvious? Most men who have any experience with women have also been lied to and felt hurt by it, at some point in their lives.	/r/TheRedPill	21/01/20 05:48 AM
0	Not a troll, but what about Redpill or MGTOW is objectively bad? Actually, I think this is an excellent illustration of the problems with TRP rhetoric. If you think it is horrifying for me to describe men as less mature than women using group level statistical differences, why aren't you horrified that TRP uses the same rhetorical device to characterize women as immature? That's definitely not what I meant by "horrifying". You're clearly an intelligent person and once again I find myself having to tell you that you know better. And if you ARE horrified, then …	/r/ExRedPill	21/01/20 05:23 AM
1	Not a troll, but what about Redpill or MGTOW is objectively bad? The fact that you think this statement is an argument against my point, rather than just further evidence for it, shows that you are in too deep. Imagine saying the same thing about jews or black people, "I don't think ALL black people are violent criminals, it's just what you can generally expect from black people." There is a reason that so many RPers are also white nationalists. It's the same rhetorical approach: over interpreting social science, generalizing about an entire group, and cloaki…	/r/ExRedPill	21/01/20 01:46 AM
-1	Things I've learned about women. Never mind it just hit me like an anvil. If "AWALT" instead equivocated in some way, many men would inappropriately use it as an escape hatch to rationalize 'just this time' presumptions about female behavior and suffer as a result of that. It's unfortunate that the implication of this is needing to lie by saying "AWALT", but I understand the reasoning now.	/r/TheRedPill	21/01/20 01:40 AM
-8	Things I've learned about women. Could you please link me to a more comprehensive justification of being strict about AWALT? I'm genuinely curious.	/r/TheRedPill	21/01/20 01:05 AM
-3	Things I've learned about women. Incidentally I have written algorithms to forecast atmospheric conditions. It's quite a lot of fun. Haven't cracked the lottery. Yet.	/r/TheRedPill	21/01/20 12:02 AM
-17	Things I've learned about women. I sense that you've been hurt, but this is a counter-productive way of thinking. You would be better served by phrasing it as "many women lie at least some of the time to get what they want" and realize that this behavior is not exclusive to women.	/r/TheRedPill	20/01/20 11:42 PM
28	Things I've learned about women. Women expect emotional support from LTRs. It's okay to do this some of the time, if it's reciprocal. The OP is noting the somewhat difficult truth that men also sometimes need emotional support. Parts of TRP will tell you to suppress it because it kills attraction. If I'm reading him correctly, the OP is taking a different tact and arguing that it's okay to be emotionally supported by a woman but that the balance should still favor you supporting her over her supporting you. Generally I agree wi…	/r/TheRedPill	20/01/20 11:38 PM
4	Not a troll, but what about Redpill or MGTOW is objectively bad? I'm going to address this as someone who has been reading both sides of the argument. The OP made a valid point: some of the ideas are good but the execution - by many of the frankly rather stupid cultists that adopt RedPill - is less than perfect. I'm going to write responses below from what I think would be the POV of a 'sensible' RedPill practitioner (who is admittedly NOT the average participant there). First of all, let's get this out of the way: yes RedPill uses absolutes, but this is misl…	/r/ExRedPill	20/01/20 10:14 PM
–	Defusing the Jesterr Yea I think you're spot on. If you have any good reading recs on creating and maintaining the 'titanium frame', I'd like to take a look at them.	/r/seduction	29/10/19 05:33 PM
1	Something that holds me back: I legitimately have no idea if women find me attractive Someone might be able to correct me on this, but afaik women don't approach men they find intimidatingly attractive. I get furtive glances while walking down the street (how women execute on this is amusing in itself) but am really never 'approached' outright. Could just be my own weird experience though.	/r/seduction	26/10/19 11:49 PM
1	I look young, kinda messes up my confidence Absolutely a good thing. For many reasons: you can get younger girls longer, you can marry much younger (which you definitely want), youth is prized by almost every corner of society and it's predicated on how you look. I know a guy who's forty and looks 25 (no joke) and even I treat him exactly as if he's 25, as does everyone else. Grow out some stubble if you want to age yourself temporarily. Develop a deeper voice. Wear more sophisticated clothing. In fact, contrasts are very attractive gener…	/r/seduction	26/10/19 11:12 PM
3	Are You Ever Shocked by Women's Heavy Sexual Flirting? "I can't quite place it, but there's something about you I find kind of intriguing. I'm [insert name]." Probably best to keep it relatively simple when you're caught off guard.	/r/seduction	17/07/19 11:16 PM