thosehabits Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Brief reply right now. You can call feminists whatever you want. But keep in mind whether the goal is to be right or to work against abuse/rape of men. Regardless of what you think "feminist" means, it has a very different connotation for many. I am telling you that the rhetoric I see here is alienating and bad marketing.	/r/MensRights	01/05/13 05:08 AM
0	Dear Prudence advice: Wife is resentful that husband makes more $ than her & maintains completely separate finances [although he pays all the bills and gives her pocket $]. Prudence tells her "Tel What part are you downvoting?	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 08:29 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Okay. I can see that being a valid argument and way of arriving at your conclusions. I still am very wary of the utility of using "feminist/feminism" in a derogatory way and expecting that I should change what I and everyone I know mean when we use the words. I am working on changing the direction (well, I am working on making sure we include men when talking about rape/domestic abuse, advocating for fathers' rights, etc.; I don't see that as a change in direction but a broadening in understandi…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 08:26 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Oh, about cars: that's why I said "in some places."	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 08:20 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Yes. I am in good health, physically fit, and I eat well/exercise. I come from family that tends to be very healthy and long-lived (I have many 90+ year old relatives who still live independently, walk or bike miles each day, etc.). I am risk-adverse. I was had a good childhood with loving parents and no trauma. My mother was healthy during her pregnancy with me, I was in a good birthweight range, and I was raised in an active family with a very healthy diet. I got really lucky in terms of healt…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 08:15 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Breasts are sexual and I don't get when people argue they're only for feeding babies or something. If that were the case, we'd only have them when feeding our young. Breasts are secondary sexual characteristics that appear at puberty. Penises are different. They're primary sexual characteristics, akin to female genitalia. Just because both breasts and penises are "outties" doesn't make them equal anymore than belly buttons and vaginas are equal.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 08:02 PM
-3	I wonder if anyone else sees the irony in the "MRM is a hate group" rhetoric? Oh, I am (entering the discussion, that is). But I am not seeing a lot of people calling it out and frankly, I am sort of sick of always educating people about how despite my vagina, I don't share the same brain with others with vaginas. It's everyone's responsibility, not just mine. In fact, I take more responsibility to call out anti-man sentiment than anti-woman sentiment because I am not personally directly harmed by it. In my experience, most people I know (80%) consider themselves feminist…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:58 PM
-1	I wonder if anyone else sees the irony in the "MRM is a hate group" rhetoric? You are using a definition of feminism that is different than the common usage. I am not saying this is incorrect, but I am just letting you know that I consider myself a feminist and an MRA, so when feminists are bashed without context, it creates a hostile environment for many individuals who view themselves as feminists. Do I support NOW? Nope. Never have. There are a lot of really stupid groups out there. I know that bad strains of any ideology exist. But if you are going to require me to id…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:47 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. In the U.S.'s history as a country, women have been explicitly oppressed in a way that men have not. That doesn't mean that men haven't also been oppressed (the draft being an excellent example, or classism/land-owning crap), but there has still been a disparity that isn't erased by averaging out the general levels of oppression through time. I am not talking about ancient times. I am talking about recent history. Rape culture supports the rape of men. Rape culture isn't about a culture of women…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:40 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. The weight at which men develop breasts varies, so it's not just a "fat people" issue (though that wouldn't make it any better). I support treating people as equals under the law regardless of gender (in the draft, in combat fighting, in marriage, in parenting). But the draft is a bad example. We haven't drafted anyone in decades. Look, are you telling me that when my male friend is coming to me to talk about emotional abuse he's suffering from a partner, it's just people being assholes? Are you…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:33 PM
3	I wonder if anyone else sees the irony in the "MRM is a hate group" rhetoric? So are the people on this sub using "feminist" to mean something different than is what is meant by the majority of people who are for equality and identify as what you would call "casual feminists"? I can see this argument, but as a probably "casual" feminist, I missed out on that nuance entirely in all the slinging of "feminist" as epithet on this sub. And I keep commenting because I am very pro-men's rights and it seems like a really terrible strategy.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:23 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Oh, also totally agree about the "flipping roles" thing. Success is when we all are safe from violence in our bodies and in our homes and able to be seen as individuals rather than dismissed because of our gender.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:20 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Where is this representation of feminism as anti-men coming from? I agree that I see a tendency towards demonizing men from the MSM, but I am not hearing or seeing it from feminists. I just feel like I'm existing in some parallel universe from many of those posting here and it's very confusing.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:19 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Thank you. I am three days in on this sub and the level of misogyny (and upvotes for it) in here is really disheartening.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:17 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Legal structural injustices are easier to fight in many ways than underlying attitudes. Do you think racism doesn't exist because we've done away with it legally? I'm all for gender equality. But if you think sexism against women (or against men) isn't alive and well, I wish I had your level of happy delusion to exist in the world.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:15 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Oh, right. This was the ULTIMATE FIGHT-OFF between feminism and MRA (which are of course at odds with no shared goals) and it took place with some weak representation on FB against OP's excellent list. Damn. You figured feminists out. OP's friend had the full list of the problems women face in the world and we clearly have conquered anti-women sexism.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:13 PM
3	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. And that's not even getting into the body image stuff surrounding balding. Hair club for men doesn't exist because we're all so accepting of each other's bodies.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:10 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. If you might put it up on FB, I'd include the ones that can be parallel to hers. Right now yours is far stronger (I think hers is a very weak example of what she could do), but to be a stronger response to hers, I'd mirror hers more directly. I think you definitely could, esp. with a lot of the sex/rape ones (because the assumption that men have to always be sexual and can't ever be raped plays into some of those) Why don't you get along with this topic? I've rewritten it below to mirror hers as…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 07:06 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. I just saw a hiring quota of 16% women minimum. That's just sad. I'm sure there would be fields where the same thing could (and probably should) be done in terms of minimum number of men. Please, don't whip your dick out. Also, while we're at it, let's all put our shirts on. I agree on gender equality here, but the last thing I want to see is more sweaty chests. Also, you do realize that breasts are not the equivalent in any way of penises? If women are seeing as equally awesome/capable, then ye…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:51 PM
2	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. I agree with you. The fact that society acts as if stranger rape occurs every time the sun sets does not make her fear rational. As a woman, I have the same society-induced fear (which I don't see as rational), but I also recognize that in reality experiences like yours are far more frequent and seem quite terrifying. I am sorry about what some idiot person did to you and I hope you healed physically are getting good support to deal with it emotionally as well.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:45 PM
3	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. She didn't say that that she was against sexist jokes only making fun of women. She said sexist jokes, period. That includes the ones you describe.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:42 PM
2	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. In my experience, I have never met someone who identified as a feminist who hated men (though I am sure some exist) or vilified men in any way. And I would say that 80% of those I know would self-identify as feminists. Based on the hate towards feminists on this sub, I am wondering if there are huge regional/other gaps in how feminists self-define/live.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:41 PM
2	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. I almost agreed with you until you seemed to actually not support the right of men with breasts to not be ridiculed. Frankly, I find a good deal of male body hair unattractive. But I keep that to myself because it's a shallow thing that is my personal hang-up, not something that should be imposed on all men just in case I might want to date them. Agree about the commercials. Dad is always a buffoon unable to clean or cook. Mom is always the one who should do the cooking and the cleaning and the …	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:38 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Actually, most people I know have positive views of feminism (the thing that brought women the right to vote!) but yet most people who are supposedly for men's rights seem to think it'll somehow help things to bash feminists in 80% of posts/responses. How are men forced to silence by her post? I've had friends post things about how women shouldn't be raped or abused, etc. I ALWAYS comment that I agree and I think men shouldn't be raped or abused either.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:35 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. WHAT THE FUCK? As a feminist I will tell you that we don't get equality just for one group. That isn't equality. DUH. I just want to be treated as a human. I just want to know that other people will be treated as humans. I have, IRL, met NOT ONE PERSON who worked for men's rights who wasn't also a feminist.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:26 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Oh, whatever. "Their" eyes. Look, sexism sucks terribly. For everyone. Always has. But structurally, legally, women were not seen as fully human in the same way as men. Women have been property, women's bodies have been property. Feminism addressed those concerns. When you condemn feminism wholesale (rather than critiquing its focus on women to the detriment of men in similar circumstances, etc.), it is hard not to see that as anti-woman and in some ways idealizing a historical period where wome…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:24 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. So feminism is a definable, coherent, and unified thing?	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:16 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Amen! Excellent list. I'd add as long as the news reports deaths in war zones with emphasis on "women and children" as if men don't matter, I support men's rights. As long as men are mocked as less capable parents in mainstream media and in advertisements, I support men's rights. As long as we find boys delays in social skills and language abilities acceptable, I support men's rights. As long as boys aren't taught to cook and clean and take care of themselves, I support men's rights.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:15 PM
0	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. I agree with a ton of what you list (95%) and it's why I support men's rights, but I take issue with: "As long as women wear fashions and adopt behaviors designed to be as sexually provocative as possible in order to enhance their sexual power and privilege, while refusing to acknowledge that their choices have any sexual content or message, or pretending that such fashions or behaviors are imposed by men" Please don't assume that you know why I dress how I dress. I am not seeking to "enhance my…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:14 PM
1	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Exactly.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:06 PM
2	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. Is there a subreddit for those of us who are in agreement with you?	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:56 PM
2	A friend of mine submitted a list of reason's why she's a feminist. I create a similar list for MR. How is that not gender discrimination? How does the fact that we can understand where it comes from make it okay? How does the fact that there is sexism in car insurance make it okay to be sexist in health insurance?	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:47 PM
3	Male Body Image: Body Surveillance Affects Men's Relationship Hopes, Study Finds Totally agree.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:42 PM
2	I wonder if anyone else sees the irony in the "MRM is a hate group" rhetoric? Right. All feminists are the same. Actually, it could my experience is an aberration, but I'd say that most of the people I know identify as feminists. They're also the people most receptive to the idea of Men's Rights. The ones who aren't feminists also tend to hold ideas that go against Men's Rights (men can't be raped, fathers can't be single parents, etc.). Who are the "normal" people you are aiming for?	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:39 PM
3	I wonder if anyone else sees the irony in the "MRM is a hate group" rhetoric? I'm also surprised by the anti-woman vitriol that pops up (especially saying "women think/say/do" as if women are a vicious hivemind, but also occasional explicit objectification). I get that sometimes people are angry at an entire group after some bad experiences. But I see that being at least somewhat accepted/endorsed on this sub and certainly not downvoted.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:36 PM
1	Mom seeks advice for her hot 17-year-old high school son who keeps getting hit on by aggressive beer-drinking college co-eds Urgh. I do have to say that I'm glad it was published and that Dear Abby's response seemed mostly appropriate, though I don't see why it needs to be a man assuring him of his reaction being normal -- the idea that our bodies sometimes respond "positively" to sexual attention even when we ourselves are wanting none of it, that's pretty well accepted regardless of gender. If Abby had been suggesting that when males are being sexually harassed, it is their responsibility to leave, that would be one…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:28 PM
-2	Dear Prudence advice: Wife is resentful that husband makes more $ than her & maintains completely separate finances [although he pays all the bills and gives her pocket $]. Prudence tells her "Tel Um, where does it say that this is a wife writing it? Prudence's advice is condescending (let's bring up fairy tales! because those are totally safe and appropriate metaphors for marriage!).	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:12 PM
1	Men should feel like they are a threat to women all the time, maybe we should segregate? I've yet to meet any human who thought it would be appropriate or acceptable in any way to attack or rape someone because they could get away with it. . (I have met both men and women who had much looser definitions of rape than the law has, from a man who thought if he paid for dinner and there was making out, she had given consent and couldn't revoke it, to a woman whose boyfriend at the time had sex with her against her will and didn't realize it was rape). I have found theft to be murkier; p…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:01 PM
0	Owner of shelter for abused men and children commits suicide after financial ruin, ridicule This is incredibly sad. Domestic violence/rape/sexual assault aren't going to go away so long as the conversation about solving it is obfuscated by the false (and deadly) assumption that men are always the perpetrators and women are always the victims. As someone who who counts among her nearest and dearest individuals who have been abused (both male and female), I want a world that tries to protect and provide safety for all of us regardless of genitals. I might be in the wrong subreddit, becau…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:36 AM
1	Men should feel like they are a threat to women all the time, maybe we should segregate? Probably, but then I am just sad for you (not in an arguing way, but in a I'm sorry about whatever context you are in that you're meeting a majority of people that shallow). I mean, I know that 19 probably isn't the pinnacle of moral thinking for most people, but that goes both ways. In my observation, when people write off "men" or "women" with sweeping statements, they seem to end up attracting the worst examples of those groups. That isn't to say that your caution against potential slander is…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 06:36 AM
1	Men should feel like they are a threat to women all the time, maybe we should segregate? You have decent points, but your condescension and attacks are masking them.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:32 AM
1	Men should feel like they are a threat to women all the time, maybe we should segregate? Writing off "most 19 year old girls" totally makes you sound credible.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:30 AM
2	Men should feel like they are a threat to women all the time, maybe we should segregate? All PEOPLE are potential victims. Not all people are potential rapists.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:28 AM
1	Men should feel like they are a threat to women all the time, maybe we should segregate? That mother doesn't sound very sympathetic. Being assumed to be a potential rapist for walking down the sidewalk doesn't sound like a great "reality" for her son, but she focuses instead on what his experience says about her feelings?	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:27 AM
2	Inviting the police to vet our partners: Clare’s Law will do nothing to stop domestic abuse, but it will poison existing, non-violent relationships. Are men not allowed to also use this law?	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:23 AM
5	Oh that was painful? Well child birth is worse. I am a female and I don't fucking want to give birth, but I would like to raise kids. So yeah, if I am in a situation with a man, there will be some resentment at the universe and yes, empathy would be the appropriate response. I have met almost no men who (express that they) wish that they got to be pregnant and give birth. Not all women share one hive mind. I have not heard women talk about childbirth making them special (except on strange quasi-hippie borderline anti-science websites perhaps)…	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:18 AM
3	Oh that was painful? Well child birth is worse. Women aren't a monolithic single opinion, TYVM.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:15 AM
2	Oh that was painful? Well child birth is worse. NEVER heard anyone say that. The only time I've heard childbirth compared to other pain IRL is when I was talking to a friend about toothaches (I've never experienced one and was trying to understand them better) and she said her sister found them worse than childbirth.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 05:14 AM
2	Pressure for child support on man causes him to kill himself, girlfriend doesn't even show up at the hearing I fail to see (at least in this article) how pressure for child support caused this man to kill himself. A tragedy regardless for his loved ones and his children.	/r/MensRights	30/04/13 04:45 AM