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| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 35 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do?? | False Accusation | throwaway17359 | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 03:12 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??....you are contradicting yourself. First you argued that my relationship was “disgusting,” now you are arguing that 19-40 year old people who have sex with 17 year olds are being victimized...? I agree you should not punish a 19 year old for having sex with a 17 year old - there should be common sense applied to those cases. I also agree with your statement about the fact that potentially “dangerous” people are more likely to break the law....but that actually detracts from your argument. You c… | /r/MensRights | 27/02/18 04:07 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??Your proposition - the same way we handle noise complaints - is the most insane thing I’ve ever heard. So if somebody doesn’t like your relationship, for whatever reason, they can make a call and you have to go to court? Do you realize how many more men would get completely fucked over in this system? Also, do you realize how incredibly subjective this is? Who would decide whether a person’s relationship was valid or not? You would basically allow society to decide whether or not a relationship … | /r/MensRights | 27/02/18 12:55 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??You continue to accuse me of not answering your questions, but you have still not answered my one question. What do you think society should do to handle power imbalances in relationships? Do YOU think it’s acceptable for a 15 year old to date a 40 year old? Where would you draw the line? What would you allow and prohibit? You seem to be playing devil’s advocate - which is fine - but I actually want to hear your point of view. I think our current consent laws are generally good - not perfect, bu… | /r/MensRights | 26/02/18 10:25 PM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??I think I understand what you’re arguing now. In theory, what you’re saying makes sense: we should eliminate all power dynamics in relationships, and not restrict these limitations to relatively arbitrary things such as age. Again, in theory, this is sound reasoning: but like we’ve mentioned before, there are numerous power imbalances (financial, age, intelligence, etc.) that occur within a single relationship. I think you would be able to find some type of power imbalance in every relationship.… | /r/MensRights | 26/02/18 04:40 PM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??I gave you the reasons for the 16 year old already, so it’s a bit annoying that you continue to make me repeat them. I think a 16 year old is still a child. You mature a significant amount between 16 and 21. Everyone matures at a different rate, and I feel that somewhere between 16 and 18 the majority of people become mature enough to decide who they want to date. You think the age of consent needs to be higher than 21. Well, I disagree. I think the age of consent is pretty much fine where it is… | /r/MensRights | 26/02/18 08:37 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??Can you clarify your argument? You just keep repeating what I’ve said and it all seems to go in a circle. You’re basically arguing that either: a) There should be a law against large age gaps in relationships as they create an unfair power dynamic Or b) There should be no laws about age gaps, as age doesn’t matter at all Why does it have to be one or the other? There is a great deal of gray area in between - I’ll admit that. You keep referencing what I said about 16-17 year olds as some proof of… | /r/MensRights | 26/02/18 07:17 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??I don’t necessarily think 16 and 40 is inherently disgusting and predatory - I think it’s on the edge (age of consent is 16 in lots of places). You argue that 16 and 40 is no different from 21 and 45 - I don’t think it is. Taking your same logic - is 21 and 45 really JUST as creepy as 30 and 6? Like with IQ - it’s the lower end of the spectrum that matters. | /r/MensRights | 26/02/18 05:41 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??I agree that the age of 16/17 is an arbitrary place to draw the line - but where would YOU draw the line? Is an age difference of 15 years a power imbalance? What about 10 years? What about 7 years? 5 years? How much financial difference can two people have before a “power dynamic” is established? You are arguing that drawing the line at 16/17 is arbitrary - and it IS arbitrary - but that is the age at which we give people the ability to choose what to do with their lives. We give people privile… | /r/MensRights | 26/02/18 03:22 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??I did not down-vote your posts. That was somebody else - in fact, I just “up”voted each one of your 3 posts, to prove it (I’m not too familiar with reddit so I don’t know if you can see). I agree that each of these scenarios - a man who is richer than his wife, or significantly smarter than his wife, or significantly older than his wife - is a power imbalance. For this reason, I am somewhat confused about what you are arguing - are you arguing that there should be no power imbalances at all in r… | /r/MensRights | 25/02/18 08:22 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??It’s tricky, because I doubt she’ll talk to him, and I’m not even allowed to admit that I know because that would be a form of “retaliation,” as we’re in the same graduate program. He’s not allowed to talk to her either. He has many text messages with her that obviously prove she was perfectly fine during and after the relationship, and that this decision that things were “abusive” occurred after he started dating someone else - hopefully that will be enough. | /r/MensRights | 24/02/18 07:05 PM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??Maybe I phrased it incorrectly. I’m not saying that his age and appearance don’t matter. When we first met and became close friends, I assumed he was younger, later found out he was older than I thought, and decided that I liked him so much that I wanted to date him regardless of his age. Of course physical attraction matters. I find him physically attractive and compelling. I also wish he was closer to my age, and I think he wishes the same. I will certainly concede that dating someone much old… | /r/MensRights | 24/02/18 08:32 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??People mature at a much greater rate between the ages of 16-18 than they do after the age of eighteen. Of course, everyone matures throughout their life, but a 21 year old is usually significantly more mature than an 18 year old. They’ve probably left home, and (in my case) graduated college and are living independently (also, I turn 22 this month - is that different? What about 23? Where do you draw the line? At a certain point, people have to become responsible for their decisions). It all dep… | /r/MensRights | 24/02/18 04:09 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??😂😂 (He is not fat and balding, btw. He’s very healthy and in great shape). I understand those arguments when talking about 16 & 17 year olds, as that is pretty young, they’re legally minors, and don’t have the rights of adults....but an eighteen year old is an adult, in the eyes of the law. They make their own decisions. You could argue that any relationship has a “power imbalance.” Is it a “power imbalance” if a man is richer than his wife or smarter than his wife or taller than his wife? Come … | /r/MensRights | 24/02/18 12:54 AM |
| 3 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??What is “the pence rule?” I definitely think there’s a problem in our culture that needs to be fixed. It shouldn’t be so easy for women like this to manipulate the system. There are plenty of crazy women and men, but in these situations only the women are taken seriously. Because of people like this, real abuse and assault cases won’t be taken seriously in the future, and young men will grow up terrified of women. Everybody loses. | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 06:19 PM |
| 3 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??Thanks for all your advice. I think he knows that I would love him with or without the job - I mean, we did start dating when he was unemployed, so I hope he knows this - but I know this is something that society makes men feel insecure about. Hopefully your partner feels the same way (I’m sure she will, if she’s any kind of woman). I’m worried about what will happen when I leave graduate school. I’m currently at a funded program, so my TA work is paying my bills, but I have no idea what I’ll do… | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 06:15 AM |
| 3 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??This seems like a startlingly accurate description of what is happening to him (except that he’s not white I guess). He’s worked so hard to get to this point, and now it’s all about to be ruined by his insane ex-girlfriend. He was very depressed when he was unemployed, and I’m really worried about what might happen in the future. Neither of us are exactly rich (I’m currently a TA) and it will be even harder for him to find a job after this, let alone one in his field. I don’t care if he has a jo… | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 05:14 AM |
| 8 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??Yes, he can - he has evidence of her trying to get back with him on multiple occasions after their relationship ended. It’s hard because we have no idea what she is claiming is “emotional abuse.” But they were “friends” for months after they broke up, while she was trying to get back together with him. I’ve been trying to convince him to get all this evidence together, but he just thinks the situation is hopeless. Hopefully I’ll be able to convince him to change his mind. Thank you so much for y… | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 04:57 AM |
| 3 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??Thank you so much!!! | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 04:52 AM |
| 4 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??You’re right - not only is he not allowed to talk to her, but he isn’t even allowed to ask what she thinks he’s actually done wrong (how the fuck can somebody defend themselves when they don’t even know what they did?) I hope people will see how clearly fabricated her story is, but the way things have been going recently in politics recently, it seems unlikely. He said the university will probably fire him just to avoid future lawsuits from her family (her dad is a lawyer). I can only imagine th… | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 04:50 AM |
| 9 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??Yes, that is correct. It is unclear how the investigation will proceed, but I will mention this to him. | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 04:32 AM |
| 2 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??What do you mean, title IX? I thought that was about prohibiting sex discrimination in schools? Edit: also, how is that fair? I think you’re being sarcastic but I don’t quite understand what you’re saying | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 03:45 AM |
| 4 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??That’s what I was afraid of. Just seems so unfair. | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 03:39 AM |
| 4 | My boyfriend’s ex is falsely accusing him of emotional and sexual abuse at the university where they both work. He might lose his job. Is there anything he can do??How is that relevant? You might think it’s gross and wouldn’t do it yourself, but it isn’t a crime. We were in the same graduate program, have similar interests, and get along well. Who cares? Also, I was asking for help with a situation. I wasn’t asking for your opinion of my relationship. If you don’t have anything productive to say, then don’t say anything. Edit: Maybe I missed the fact that this was sarcastic - unfortunately, I hear this kind of thing from people all the time, so I assumed y… | /r/MensRights | 23/02/18 03:34 AM |
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