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troubleonwheels Archive

View 3 posts and 26 comments by troubleonwheels on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

I'd like to hear other's opinions on both these replies and the original post from people who are able to communicate without sounding like Meat-Head Rob Lowe.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/15 11:02 PM
1

Of course it is. Within the context of MRP, the only version of SMV that matters is your wife's perception of your SMV. This is why we use dread, why holding frame and being 'the Oak' is so much more important in MRP, and why we stress having hobbies, getting out of the house, and why we end up stressing handing 'comfort tests' as much as 'shit tests'. We're not fucking 20-year-old punks out spitting game at a club where the womans education and income isn't important. If you don't think income …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/15 08:38 PM
1

No matter how good I look, how charming or personable I am, no matter what value I bring to the table as a person - my wife still earns 80% of our household income. She knows it and I know it, and that 'dependence' our family has on her will always give her a higher SMV. There is literally nothing I can do to my person to overcome income reliance. I have allowed this situation to come to pass because I was better suited personality-wise to raising the kid and keeping the house in order, and my w…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/15 05:53 PM
5

"I still don't know what the future holds for me on this path, but one thing is clear is that I'd rather die than go back to the way I was." Quoted for Truth
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/15 06:38 PM
1

Make sure you're not entering into a covert contract on this one. Hold the kids because you're a good dad, and because you want to share the load, not out of expectation that she'll reciprocate with affection.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/01/15 04:05 PM
1

Well, others have jumped in before I got back and given you some great advice. Seems there's not a more serious depression issue at hand here and she just needs to be reminded that her man is the prize (and for her man to step up and BE the prize).
/r/MarriedRedPill08/01/15 04:04 PM
2

How does she behave toward the kids, and towards you in non-sexual circumstances? Does she treat the kids with care and affection (both verbally and physically)? When you're riding in the car together do you have pleasant, normal conversations or is it awkward and as if she's trying to be as far away from you as possible? This may not be a sexual or even a relationship issue, but something much more psychologically serious.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/15 04:56 PM
1

Or, actually have her get evaluated for ADHD. My wife found she was definitely ADHD and the administration of Ritalin has stopped these kind of behaviors (yeah, same ones you describe exactly). She's now able to join me in decisions and follow through. Also, she's aware of the marital situation more. That means more help, more cooperatiin, and more sex. Yep, she notices that I have needs.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/12/14 06:46 AM
1

Your statement is correct, but what is important here is your wife's impression of your SMV. If dressing nice while away from your wife increases your confidence then by all means do it. It simply isn't required to increase your wife's competition anxiety.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/14 05:16 PM
2

it's a "I don't need to compete with you" attitude. Seriously. This. If you're not in this mentality then you've got work to do on your internal-Alpha. Even if you're not AMOG, your wife should not see you behaving that way.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/14 04:33 AM
5

You have my complete support in this writing. I agree with the others' criticism of Level 11 - plus it could seriously mess with the divorce proceedings that are bound to happen and swing it wildly in her favor. But excellent work. I'll be saving it.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/14 02:45 AM
1

There was discussion of a side bar about a month ago. Sadly, it requires time and effort. And wife and kids and job are the reality for most here. The Rational Male is also where I point people most often.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/09/14 02:49 AM
1

For a good ASD analysis: http://therationalmale.com/2011/11/09/the-tool-of-asd/ And then...the advice I have is the same as everyone elses' - read the sidebar :) I know that's tired and crappy advice, but what you're looking for is the whole of the Red Pill experience. You change yourself, you change your position in the relationship, and then she comes to you looking for that kinky sex to affirm her position with you, instead of you seeking it from her. Right now she's still on the pedestal, an…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/08/14 05:54 AM
2

I agree whole heartedly with this analysis - it doesn't sound like you actually have anything wrong, you just can't agree on what's right. She has an unintentional and unaware anti-slut defense that has become part of who she is. There is lots of great writing on this, I suggest some reading.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/08/14 05:17 AM
2

As you never had the dominant frame in the relationship, gaining it now (or at least a better balance) is going to be hard. You should plan on it taking a long time and not being all that pleasant. She's going to fight some parts of it, because all humans hate giving up power. But this is where you should start - read everything you can on gaining and maintaining frame -in a relationship-. That's the important part - the PUA and plate-spinners version of frame necessarily has to be different tha…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/08/14 05:48 AM
1

I like everything about this. As WishIHadMyOldUsernam pointed out, this can be a slippery slope. Make sure the spending is in your frame, and either on you or on the couple. A financially independent man with the willingness to spend has a high perceived SMV. A man who is treated as required to spend to keep her attention is going to lose. Again, maintain frame in this new adventure and you'll do well.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 03:15 PM
2

A huge part of married game is creating the impression of high SMV, even if you can't use it. Going to the same place all the time is pretty boring, and she won't be thinking you've got anything new to offer. I don't know what town you're in or what it's food scene is like, but in my town going to the same place over and over is a sign of weakness. Attractive men know all the new spots, all the most desireable places to eat, and if you can 'wow' her with being that guy your value will rise appro…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 04:56 AM
4

I also want to point out that dad SHOULD be the muscle. Women are nurturing and supportive and guiding. Not that it applies to this situation, but dad should be the one to go to when heads need to be knocked (not that I use violence against my kid, but it's the alpha MALE response of get in line or I will make you vs. please honey do what I ask). In this situation your dad influence wasn't needed, so not applicable. But don't deny that role - the male is the enforcer.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 04:43 AM
2

Nothing wrong with it. Just pointing out that different replies can all be within frame and result in different results. Sometimes, if the situations were all different, 'fuck off' would have been just as good.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 04:40 AM
1

I'm afraid the term 'stealing a kiss' is misleading. He took the lead with sexual agression, and put the interaction on his term. He took a kiss. That's what people want to read, even though the result is the same
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 03:53 AM
5

Absolutely. It is the classic and, in my world most common, married shit test. I'd like to hear how you solved it. In my world, I quit asking and started telling. "Tonight we are going to go to X". If I get honest argument (i.e. she actually doesn't want to go there instead of just being bitchy) I offer a second, different type of food option (and usually one I know she likes). If she balks again, I say make a choice between the two, or we will stay home and fend for ourselves. I have never yet …
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 03:45 AM
2

You have some questions to answer first: Can you support yourself outside the marriage? Are you willing to lose half (or a lot more) of your shit? Kids? If things were 'better', would you still want to be married to this woman? If the answer to all of these questions is "yes", then you are in a good place to say fuck it, I don't care. That's one major step of unplugging. If not, then you have some self-discovery to do until you can either get there or live with the consequences of what you have.…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 01:33 AM
2

There seems to be a huge vast chasm in the manosphere between 'nice' and 'rude'. I cringe when I see guys posting actual conversations where they are straight up dicks. That will work short term when you're spinning plates and just want to get laid, but if you treat someone you plan on living with for a long time like dirt you're bound to build up resentment that isn't based on your SMV or your red/blue pill nature, but just on you being a dick. The term 'nice' is used here as passive, agreeable…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 12:31 AM
1

I've always been of the opinion that responding in terse ways can be interpreted as rude and only lead to conflict, and it adds nothing to he respect you command with your reply. It may, however, help you internally maintain frame (in which case keep it up). You would have lost nothing by saying "I'm not concerned about them". It may have turned her down a notch instead of up, making life easier for everyone. This sub IS about helping maintain LTR's, and part of maintaining is both people being …
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/14 12:14 AM
3

This is one of those times when balancing alpha/beta aspects can be tricky, but in any healthy LTR you're gonna have to do it. There is nothing Beta about admitting when you're wrong with honesty and sincerity. Over-apologizing, groveling, self-deprecating and demeaning your self worth over the same mistake are a different matter. Everyone makes mistakes, there is nothing wrong with owning yours. Diminishing your perceived value due to a mistake is very Beta. However, I couldn't agree more - whe…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/08/14 09:24 PM
0

Would you actually go into details? This entire thread right here is the entire reason I've been reading RedPill everything-I-can-find, but there is precious little detailing how to apply and work through the change when in an existing LTR you would actually like to remain in
/r/TheRedPill28/06/14 07:24 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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