uNPoPSTeR2001 Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
13	I feel both disappointed in and betrayed by her family	Dealing with the Ex / STBX	uNPoPSTeR2001	/r/Divorce_Men	02/07/24 07:29 PM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
3	Accountability Radical Acceptance is the key, my friend. For way too long I struggled with how little accountability my wife every took. I got quite upset at her lack of decency towards me and how she consistently played the victim card, even when she was fully to blame. Then I heard and read about radical acceptance, which is the profound point of view of accepting those things you cannot chance and instead focusing on those you could. In my case, that moment of clarity came when I radically accepted that thi…	/r/Divorce_Men	22/08/24 04:23 AM
8	Time to acknowledge who she really was wow, it's almost as if you just described my situation and my perspective perfectly. I feel exactly the same about my stbxw, who eventually revealed herself as an incredibly selfish, bitter and misguided person. And like you said, I too cannot wait to be free of her. Thank you for putting into words what I have been experiencing too.	/r/Divorce_Men	14/08/24 02:23 PM
7	What was your final straw? The moment of clarity I got when I finally realized that she is not interested in taking any accountability for the problems in our marriage. In her mind the slow demise of our marriage was solely my fault, even though reasonable people understand that these things are caused by both partners and not everything is so black and white. So her lack of reason and failure to take responsibility finally did me in. I told her this life was unsustainable for me and that I was moving out.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/08/24 02:37 PM
1	Not divorced... yet. Any ideas? I had a similar experience in that I worked full time and then came home to do the laundry, clean the house, take out the garbage, etc etc. with very little support or help from my STBXW. This feeling of being taken advantage of tends to fester and grow over time, eventually overwhelming you. Try not to get to that place because, as your buddy said, there is no turning back. Have you addressed this with your wife? Or has the act of simply addressing this led to fights or resistance from her? If …	/r/Divorce_Men	08/08/24 02:32 PM
2	The depths that my STBX goes to, to avoid taking any accountability for her actions… it’s actually pretty insane, and has pushed me to lose absolutely all respect for her. My STBXW has also not been able to take any accountability for her actions and, most importantly, her significant role in the demise of our marriage. Throughout the last few years before I finally said "enough is enough" I practically begged her to take responsibility for our issues - and she simply ignored these pleas and instead blamed it all on me. But here's the thing brother, I recently adopted the Stoic POV of "Radical Acceptance" (look it up) and the most significant thing I accepted is t…	/r/Divorce_Men	07/08/24 04:42 PM
3	Who's my emergency contact now?!? For me, this was also one of those moments that made the divorce feel real - when I had to fill in my emergency contact for a new job and didn't have anyone to fill in anymore.	/r/Divorce_Men	27/07/24 03:19 PM
3	How is home value determined? hire independent home appraisers ASAP. They will come and provide a full report of value within a week of visiting your home. In my case my STBXW and I hired our own appraisers and agreed on the average between the two values provided to us.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/07/24 09:56 PM
1	Good lawyer with reasonable charge in central new jersey Jordan Rickards - www.rickardslaw.com	/r/Divorce_Men	06/07/24 11:25 AM
1	I feel both disappointed in and betrayed by her family sorry, but what is "OP"? I'm new to this subreddit. My in-law are also advancing in age and frankly don't have many years left. Like you, I've thought about what I will do when they eventually die and I've come to the conclusion that I will NOT attend their funerals or family get-togethers. I truly feel betrayed by them. They are smart and capable and have obviously made their decision to turn their backs on me so what then do I now owe them? It is however sad and didn't need to be like this.	/r/Divorce_Men	03/07/24 04:40 PM
2	I feel both disappointed in and betrayed by her family yes, I simply don't get it and never will either. I've always tried to do the right thing when it comes to my relationships. The fact that these people, who I respected and admired for most of my adult life, have simply not done even remotely close to the right thing is both shocking and very disappointing. There are times that I want to reach out and tell them my side of the story, because all stories have 2 sides, but the decent part in me knows that it is not right for me to share how damaged…	/r/Divorce_Men	03/07/24 12:15 PM
3	I feel both disappointed in and betrayed by her family yeah, I hear you. Throughout this last year I've adopted the radical acceptance point-of-view, and it has been extremely helpful when it has come to my wife and my cancer. Specifically when it comes to my STBXW, I have accepted that she had turned into a toxic person and that no matter what I did or said she would never change. And when it came to her side of the family I have tried to accept that "maybe this is who they have been all along". But I have to admit that I am struggling to accept th…	/r/Divorce_Men	03/07/24 12:11 PM
1	Where to move after divorce Many younger men, like myself, are somewhat trapped to live close to their ex's in order to also be close to our kids. Not that I am belittling that at all - we men need to be there for our kids and especially at a time when their parents are separating. I am choosing to live 10 minutes from our marital home so that I can be available for my kids. However, I have also wanted to live by the beach and since the coast is only 25 minutes away from me I'm going to move there and still be about 30 min…	/r/Divorce_Men	02/07/24 12:28 AM