udxxr Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
206	A man is useful. Don't be useless.	Red Pill Theory	udxxr	/r/TheRedPill	23/03/23 08:28 PM
6	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"?	Discussion	udxxr	/r/PurplePillDebate	09/03/23 09:30 PM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
3	I see a lot of posts on this sub about what women think about autistic men in the dating landscape. What is the consensus on the reverse of that? So like question for the men on here: would you date a woman on the spectrum and do you think woman on the spectrum have it easier than men with ASD? Thanks. I find it a shame that this is an area of study that's shunned. Your question is a little complicated, it suggests to me that you think if men were more masculine, they'd fit into society better. I think generally, women and men are good at adapting to their molds of femininity and masculinity. But a man being masculine does not make him compatible with society. If anything, as a man becomes more masculine, he is less likely to adapt to society, and more likely to try to change society, …	/r/PurplePillDebate	03/08/23 06:22 PM
6	I see a lot of posts on this sub about what women think about autistic men in the dating landscape. What is the consensus on the reverse of that? So like question for the men on here: would you date a woman on the spectrum and do you think woman on the spectrum have it easier than men with ASD? If you believe in the male variability hypothesis, men are more likely to have varied personality characteristics and genetics. Statistically, men are more likely to be both better than average and worse than average, compared to women whose results are generally more consistent (and in many cases, on average better than men). For men who are incompetent, and know they can't match up to other men (say, socially, or in a work setting), what is their incentive to conform? Why would they play a gam…	/r/PurplePillDebate	03/08/23 02:58 PM
1	The average young man is objectively absolutely unappealing and it is a GOOD thing for the rest of men in general that he is not dating or having sex Well I would agree with you, in that it'd be nice if all men could be successful. I don't think it's possible for everyone to be successful. Women are wired to find and date the successful men in their life. They are much more likely to leave their man if he loses his job. If you extend this to unsuccessful men looking for a partner, why do you think they "deserve" one? What does the woman get for dating these pathetic men?	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/07/23 01:28 PM
3	The average young man is objectively absolutely unappealing and it is a GOOD thing for the rest of men in general that he is not dating or having sex Society has become safer and more accepting. Weak men are not encouraged to get stronger. Masculinity is punished. Men are encouraged to be cooperative, nice, and accepting. Men are encouraged to take a safe route in life; get your degree, get your job, car, house, work your 9-5. Weak men are being uplifted. Anger is demonized. Men are also not allowed to be sexual except in very specific circumstances. Obviously there is good reason for some of these things to exist, but as a consequence men ha…	/r/PurplePillDebate	26/07/23 08:00 PM
3	The average young man is objectively absolutely unappealing and it is a GOOD thing for the rest of men in general that he is not dating or having sex It's what it is. Does everyone deserve to have a relationship? No, and that's to be expected. There are some men that will just fail. True for some women too but men have much greater potential to be failures	/r/PurplePillDebate	26/07/23 07:09 PM
1	The average young man is objectively absolutely unappealing and it is a GOOD thing for the rest of men in general that he is not dating or having sex That's life. Women go for the men they want, men sleep with the women they can. It's not fair, but on the plus side, it's easier for men to stand out because most men don't work very hard on themselves, if at all.	/r/PurplePillDebate	26/07/23 07:02 PM
2	How do I get to know an extremely shy and reserved guy? I'm glad you're really excited about him, but he sounds like a complicated prospect. Nonetheless if you wanna go down this route I think you'll be doing most of the chasing. I'd suggest you find out more about him from MutualFriend. You can also let MutualFriend know that you're interested in this guy, and hopefully they can facilitate things from the other end/nudge him in the right direction.	/r/RedPillWomen	12/07/23 02:13 PM
1	How do I get to know an extremely shy and reserved guy? It's possible he's never been in a relationship before. Guys like this don't know how to flirt or respond to flirting, let alone maintaining a conversation with women. What do you see in him? You're afraid to ask him out; how do you feel about taking the lead? Also, you may have to get to know this guy through your mutual friend first	/r/RedPillWomen	12/07/23 01:30 PM
-1	How do I get to know an extremely shy and reserved guy? He is crazy nervous around you. Could be nerves, maybe he thinks you're very pretty. He seems inexperienced. He might be a major overthinker and is "playing it safe", from the way he responds to you. Out of curiosity how old are you guys? Also, ask your mutual friend how this guy is around other women. Obviously drinks can help, but you probably don't want to get to know him through getting him drunk every time you meet. It'll be up to you to let him feel safe enough to make a move. Though some …	/r/RedPillWomen	12/07/23 12:57 PM
26	Boyfriend wants kids in his mid thirties, im not sure if I can wait that long There is never a "right" time to have a child. For men, the burden of having children is mostly financial, which gets easier as he gets older. But for women the burden is going to be physical, which will get worse as you get older; lower chances of pregnancy, greater risk of complications, disorders, miscarriage. Not to mention that you'll be less energetic as you get older; chasing a 5-year old when you're 40 or talking to your teenager when you're 50 is going to be daunting. It's a shame but i…	/r/RedPillWomen	05/07/23 12:42 PM
1	The real problem with debate here is Axioms, allow me to explain. Fair enough, but I would say that improving yourself has always led you to become more successful. But since you're doing well for yourself you don't need it. But I do agree with their belief that there's a lot of merit to traditional masculinity and men should try to cultivate some of those qualities. That's basically where I am too. I think most of the RP tenets are traditionally desirable masculine traits that are being rejected in today's world, and have to be relearned.	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/06/23 05:20 PM
1	The real problem with debate here is Axioms, allow me to explain. According to RP you could be even more successful than you currently are, if you got a good career, made more money, and showed no vulnerability. For a lot of people, men and women, what turns them off most about TRP is the fact that they're largely made up of misogynistic namecalling manchildren. Do you actually disagree with RP concepts, or do you just hate their members?	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/06/23 03:32 PM
1	The real problem with debate here is Axioms, allow me to explain. I think a bigger problem is red pill men's need to assume and generalize all women. Generalities work though. They may not work for you specifically but they work in general, and aren't meant to literally label everyone in the group. There's nothing wrong with that, unless you think its offensive to assume anything about anyone. RP generalizes men too but they don't seem to have a problem with it, if anything men will readily sort themselves into the category they think applies to them, and then…	/r/PurplePillDebate	21/06/23 04:05 PM
3	The real problem with debate here is Axioms, allow me to explain. Which is why the exact same axiomatic RP questions appear every day and are endlessly refuted with nothing but emotion or personal experience. Really all of the discussion on the front page could be resolved if we could agree that men and women are different and want different things from each others. RP: "Women like tall men." BP: "I'm a woman who likes short men so you're wrong." RP: "Men should become more attractive by becoming strong, rich, and successful" BP: "All girls are different and l…	/r/PurplePillDebate	21/06/23 01:02 PM
1	How to increase my SMV with a disability? You're really aware of your hearing aids but to regular people they're not obvious, and are often mistaken for bluetooth headsets/earbuds, so these first impressions are mostly visual. Those girls might be assuming you're a total meathead, or you're misreading their expression. Also if you carry yourself like an awkward loser people are still gonna look at you funny, except instead of being a nerdy incel you're a grotesque gymbro.	/r/TheRedPill	05/06/23 03:25 PM
5	Q4M: How do you define “fat”? https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/323446#body-mass-index-bmi My mistake not including the upper end of that. 110lbs to 140lbs for a 5'4", averaging at 125lbs	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 10:21 PM
1	Q4M: How do you define “fat”? You're exactly right, most guys who are drawn to RP stuff don't actually improve themselves. It's more of an internet phenomena than an RP phenomena, though RP also teaches men to embody alpha and hold frame, so idiots take that to mean hurling insults and putting down those weaker than you.	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 04:08 PM
0	Q4M: How do you define “fat”? That's the thing though. The people who use the red pill properly don't need to complain and bitch on internet forums. When they've succeeded, they don't need to come back. All that's left are the losers with no motivation, and the occasional self-aggrandizing guru who wants to sell them another book or supplement.	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 02:51 PM
5	Q4M: How do you define “fat”? Their insults are a childish show of dominance. RP'ers egg each others on with insults and define outgroups to hate. Really, most of them aren't RP at all; they're childish fanboys who are trying to prove themselves	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 02:31 PM
0	Q4M: How do you define “fat”? Something I do want to make clear: what RP men mean by an average woman is a woman who sits at a healthy weight, neither skinny nor overweight. For a 5'4" woman that'd probably be around 110 lbs. Not the average american woman, who sits at around 170 lbs. What you don't capture in your post is that the RP also rags on overweight men; everyone, men and women, should be fit.	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 02:26 PM
29	Q4M: How do you define “fat”? Men are going by looks. No one's asking a girl their BMI before rejecting them. I think we can agree though that there are people who can hide the weight well, and there are people whose weight is plainly obvious. I recall a fun little experiment a poster did a few months ago where they had a lineup of overweight men and women and asked people to rate their attractiveness; maybe someone can do the same for individuals who may be teetering between normal and over weight. There may be cultural fac…	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/05/23 01:03 PM
1	Question regarding why men are less pushed to have kids than women Mothers and female family members will often pressure daughters for grandchildren because they are concerned about continuing their lineage (and that means you need to have babies early, while they are young and fertile), whereas most men are not concerned about it because they can continue their lineage whenever they want (so they can afford to wait until they have a house, car, stable job etc.). As women age, their chances of conceiving drop, while the risk of birth complications and defects/a…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/04/23 07:36 PM
2	Question regarding why men are less pushed to have kids than women I don't think we need more stay-at-home dads. What we do need to do is stop villifying and mocking househusbands. We don't need to encourage more men to be house-husbands; generally speaking men would prefer to be out working. When economically possible, women prefer to leave the workforce after having children because they would prefer to spend time raising their children. (Even extremely qualified women will experience this maternity instinct and leave the workforce, often to the despair of co…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/04/23 07:06 PM
1	The only reason the concept of the redpill is popular is because it actually gives tangible solutions. Yeah but women want RP men. They say they hate it, but they still look for and desire masculine men. At its core RP tells men to become more masculine; and that means get stronger, be confident, be successful, and project yourself. It teaches that weak men are worthless. I assume by misogyny you mean attempts to undermine the progression of women in society, either by rewarding submission, or preferring feminine women over masculine women. If this was true, women would also need to be interested…	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/03/23 05:47 PM
16	Generally speaking, most guys in relationships are not valued for who they are, but for how they make their girlfriends feel and what they can provide for them (attention, money, status and so on). Was about to say this is a 2 way street lol. Women are valued for how they make their boyfriend feel and and what she can provide to them (sex, attention, status). OP seems to think that women can get away with existing but I don't buy it; ugly, obese, older, annoying, slutty women are less valued, just as ugly, short, awkward, broke, inexperienced men are less valued. Useless post, unless OP cares to explain.	/r/PurplePillDebate	28/03/23 01:08 PM
8	Q4W: Are you more attracted to a "naturally" attractive man than the one who "learned" to become attractive? Yeah, this is my problem. Dating a rather energetic girl and it is getting quite exhausting after 6 months of weekend dates/hangouts. I barely have energy for my own friends now and I'm perpetually exhausted during the weekdays after work. I guess my issue is introverted people just do not meet easily.	/r/PurplePillDebate	28/03/23 12:36 PM
0	Honest and genuine question. What is it that women actually want? I think there's a lot of difference in these answers. Oftentimes the men I know who got broken up with "for no reason" were ignoring the small gestures their women craved, because HE thought it wasn't important. I read this as: women enjoy gestures of affection. This isn't an obvious thing to men, who may think showering women with money and gifts or having sex with them qualifies as affection. What women want will vary according to the individual, but in general the features they look for are t…	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/03/23 05:27 PM
0	Honest and genuine question. What is it that women actually want? You don't have to read between the lines to understand what OP is looking for. OP's example of the lady on the Steve Harvey show was a checklist for her ideal boyfriend. OP wants to arrange himself in a way that checks off the most boxes for as many women as he can. But I digress When men say they want a petite virgin with a pretty face who'll give them a kiss when they come back from work, its because they want someone they can protect, who won't compare your relationship/sex with other men she…	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/03/23 01:24 PM
3	Aside from "Women's standards are too high or No more good men" Why do you think YOUR single? Not sure lol its a complete 180 from my personality You may not like the idea of changing who you are entirely but that might be what it takes. If bodies can be unattractive so can personality types. It's messed up, but changing your personality can seriously improve your social success. I used to be a really passive kid in my school years. But I had a bit of an awakening and forced myself to be more outgoing and personable, and it's helped a lot in my personal life. I can literally feel the ene…	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/03/23 05:11 PM
1	Honest and genuine question. What is it that women actually want? I don't expect women to understand men, or men to understand women. It's a fool's game, we're wired differently. That's not any kind of pill, that's basic science. Having this much testosterone running through your body fucks you up in ways women can't imagine	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/03/23 03:26 PM
2	Honest and genuine question. What is it that women actually want? I'll try and summarize what they wrote: Original OP asked "what do women ACTUALLY want". matjeom answered "We all want different things. We’re individuals." This is technically true and an honest response, but isn't useful. Groups act in trends; what Americans want is different from what French people want. What 20 year olds want is different from what 40 year olds want. What women want is different from what men want. When a man is asking this question, he's asking "what do women ACTUALLY want,…	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/03/23 02:35 PM
1	The Rise in Online and Bar/Club-scene Dating, and the Decrease in Social Circle Dating Explains Poor Outcomes, Due to Reduced Reputation Effects When you're talking about people they know	/r/PurplePillDebate	20/03/23 04:36 PM
3	Men, does a woman's educational background or career success boost her attractiveness? Doesn't matter at all then	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/03/23 02:33 PM
5	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? One of the main reasons is online dating I think I think people (men and women) act considerably differently online vs offline. There are tons of men that women will give a chance to when they meet offline first, simply because men actually have an opportunity to show what they are. And if the man has some rizz they can find him attractive, even if he isn't physically attractive. Men also don't approach every woman in their social circles or local haunts, they will choose the ones they think the…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 06:56 PM
2	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? what makes some men attractive Not ugly. Taller than you. Gainfully employed. Fighting for a good life for the two of you. A rock you can lean on when times are tough. Witty and will make you laugh. Liked by his friends and adored by other women. That was an interesting exercise. In that sense I can see why perhaps the majority of single men don't meet the mark, even as generous as I'm being with a definition of attractiveness. I can resonate with that short story, my father and grandfather used…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 05:04 PM
1	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? I can agree with this, to some extent. I recall an amusing anecdote from a military recruitment officer that the average young american male is no longer fit for the military, and there are probably statistics in the military that could confirm this. In the past you had a reasonable expectation for what an able-bodied male was because most men expected to get into blue-collar work, in factories, construction sites, mines, etc. Now, most men are either pre-serum Steve Rogers or too big to run. De…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 04:44 PM
3	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? The things women value highest in a relationship have all shifted, and it’s up to you to market yourself and fill those needs accordingly if you want a partner (and the same goes for us). The things women value highest seem to be the same as what they did before they had bank accounts; physically attractive, mentally sharp, financially successful. Besides shifting upwards, are there other requirements?	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 04:16 PM
1	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? That's a good point. Like I said though this is just a thought experiment, imagining how dating would work in a society where somehow all the men could be considered "conventionally attractive". So from an evolutionary lens, attractiveness depends on what is available	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 04:07 PM
1	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? Its true that there are different ways to be attractive. I won't go as far to say that everyone is uniquely attractive, or that there is no way to determine attractiveness. As a society we can agree on traits that are attractive, even if we personally don't find them attractive. I know a good looking guy when I see one even if I'm not into them. I'm not into latinas but I know which latinas are likely more attractive etc. Are there women attracted to bald men? Sure. Does that mean bald men are a…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 03:48 PM
3	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? So, I conclude, women are just not satisfied with what normal men normally are. Could be, though your example is a little extreme. Why is the average man no longer enough for the average woman? Are they thinking that any/every average woman can have an above average man? Or would they prefer to hold out for the chance that they can secure that hot man? According to them, almost all men are too short, ugly, or broke. Yeah, from what I gather talking to (single) female friends and colleagues, a lo…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 03:34 PM
2	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? The situation isn't the same for average women. In OLD you get too many men offering themselves, and it's easy to find enough that you find attractive; the hard part is scheduling the best ones in the time you have available. Why pick any of the 15 average looking guys when 5 hot ones asked you out too? And hopefully one of them has a nice personality and isn't unemployed. which doesnt have to always do with physical attraction, I have felt intense chemistry with very average looking men and non…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 03:18 PM
1	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? It could be. Maybe attractiveness can only exist with something to compare it to. Or maybe the male dating pool skews towards unattractive, because anyone remotely attractive gets snatched up quickly. Or maybe turning everyone into physical ideals just makes individual personality the most important component. There are a ton of assumptions going into that question Or perhaps attractiveness is not sufficient to make someone dateable; the social component could be more important than attraction. …	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 02:07 PM
1	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? Perhaps I should narrow this to single individuals. Most men and women in relationships are not looking for more, so those women that have picked their man take both of them out of the dating pool (theoretically). I guess in a way this means that the dating pool for men should be disproportionately filled with unattractive men, since the moderately attractive ones could already get a girl, and the extremely attractive ones might just never leave. While the dating pool for women is disproportiona…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 02:02 AM
1	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? I guess I can share my relationship as an example. I have a car and drive her around a lot. She thinks I'm a good conversationalist/listener. Our friends like me and I think we occupy a nice spot in our social circles. I make sure she has a good time during outings and I plan most of our dates. Meanwhile I think she's a soothing presence. She encourages me and acts like my cheerleader. She's also dragged me to a lot of activities with her friends which I admit was good for me. She's playful and …	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 01:51 AM
1	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? I suppose I am splitting hairs. So if attractiveness is relative, what makes most men so unattractive? Are attractive men so much more appealing that regular men can't compare? Or have men always been unattractive and it was women's lack of choice that allowed average men to procreate. An average woman always has something to give to the guy, a guy on her level doesn’t always have anything to reciprocate. Curious about this part. What does the average woman offer to the average man? Now that bot…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 01:30 AM
1	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? Yeah, the bar is always moving up. So women will always try to be picked by the best men they can attract, as they have tried to for since forever. And men compete to be the best male, as they always have been. Guess nothing changes even if we're all hot ad fuck	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 01:06 AM
2	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? Exactly! Haha. Now attractive people become ordinary people Yeah, thats a possibility. Making everyone hot doesnt solve the dating problem obviously, but modern men are not living up sufficiently to the male ideals presented by movie stars and singers. Perhaps this is a poor job by men, or delusion by women thinking they can all have the perfect man. Anyway, this was just supposed to be a little thought experiment. But I guess I'm being educated	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 01:04 AM
3	Are women specifically dating the top X% of men, or do men simply not meet the "bar"? I agree that there are objective components to attractiveness. Its not entirely objective and our lived experience will change what an ideal partner looks like to each of us but there are obvious common threads for attractive individuals I also agree that in a vacuum, most women would date conventionally attractive men. The question i'm posing is whether even in a society full of "conventionally attractive men" the men would be ranked and sorted, and then women would still decide to date within …	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/03/23 01:00 AM
1	Honest question. Women who are in relationships, what do you bring to your relationship? Life hard. Tiddy warm and soft.	/r/PurplePillDebate	07/03/23 05:24 PM
6	Do male and female PPD users use the word "women" differently? Help! The mother of the maiden my heart pines for will not allow me to see her, for the crone in her house forbade it.	/r/PurplePillDebate	09/02/23 08:09 PM
2	Displaying stereotypical gendered behavior is crucial to get laid as a man They just don't want to tell people they aren't attractive or that they're doing something wrong. Since saying anything that could be construed as hurtful is some kind of violence. It's so much easier to give some well-meaning but useless assurance, than to tell him flat out why he's not attractive. Problem is, some guys will genuinely believe that they are fine as they are, and will reject actual advice because they've been told that they don't need to change, just to keep looking.	/r/PurplePillDebate	09/02/23 06:06 PM
1	Modern dating is like a housing bubble The proper analogy here is that many women would rather rent luxury mansions for years than buy a home in their budget.	/r/PurplePillDebate	03/02/23 01:58 PM