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upandatom85 Archive

View 0 posts and 175 comments by upandatom85 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
6

Welcome to the thunderdome. I'm very sure there is a direct correlation between these kinds of judgments and the male homeless population.
/r/MensRights22/05/25 06:46 PM
1

Well said.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/25 02:18 PM
2

I hope you enjoyed your Halloween and that you find peace going forward. There are good people out there. Keep your head up.
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/24 03:05 PM
1

I agree, but it keeps us out of jail and the poor house. I wish it were different. There are good women out there, but it's not like it used to be.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 06:08 AM
9

Realistic...
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/24 08:15 PM
2

Happy birthday. I feel every aspect of your post. To better times.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 11:07 PM
1

That's what I hear. I like sledding and quading. I tried to kill myself with both. I guess the bike is next.
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/24 12:33 AM
5

I'm proud of you. I guess I need a motorcycle now...
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/24 09:47 PM
2

Lol, post tax. I wish.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 11:59 PM
1

Good man.
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/24 02:35 AM
8

That's disgusting.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 05:35 PM
1

I went to the bank and had them print out the stuff for me. It cost me like 35 bucks for the last 3 years, if I recall. It wasn't so much what the lawyer requested. The lawyer just wanted income. I had it printed out to see how much I had wasted over the past few years. Ya...
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/24 04:22 PM
1

I just try to help others around here now. I've been through so much, and I've messed up in so many ways. I wish I knew then what I knew now. I could have done so much better. Now I have to play the long game. I wish you the best.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 11:52 PM
1

Both under 10. It's been rough. I love my kids and I miss them. My ex pulled out all the stops. Left me homeless. Bs restraining order. Stole the home. Affected my future and future relationships. I carry on.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 11:47 PM
1

Read the line after that one again.... I'm still living with my parents and paying through the nose after surgeries and time off work. I guess it could be worse. Have to look forward and spend as much time with my kids as I can. Don't know how long I'll be around, but things are going OK.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 11:43 PM
2

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 08:20 PM
3

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 08:20 PM
7

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/24 09:09 PM
9

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/24 09:09 PM
8

Luckily, you could prove the cheating. Good for you. Most of our states and provinces don't give a fuck about cheating. Fucking hypergamy. Fuck cheaters. Sorry. Take care.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/24 08:53 PM
15

It's probably around 60k. Plus, paying child support for a long time to come. 15 k a year plus more. 30 k in lawyers' bills. I'm not done yet. Now the housing market is wack and I'm stuck with my parents. So, I lost my dignity in a couple of ways, too. Luckily, I got cancer, so I got a payout from my insurance. My ex is worse than cancer. I guess I'm lucky. I dunno.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/24 08:51 PM
1

Yes, that's possible. It would, of course, vary by country as well. Or we could just not believe baseless allegations leveed against men, or anyone for that matter. Allegations that are used as weapons in and of themselves. Used to secure a family home, parental rights(read child support), and damage mental health to the point that offing oneself seems reasonable. Ask me how I know.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/24 08:43 PM
3

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 11:09 PM
4

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 11:09 PM
3

This guy's has been through it. He knows. We all know.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/24 03:50 AM
2

That's reasonable. King. These women are something else, aren't they? You are right about exercise. But we can't forget our mental health. Most of us have been through hell. I found walking to be super helpful. I read a lot. We need to support each other. It's a tough fukin road, man.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 02:29 PM
2

Off position. Well said. We've really been through hell, haven't we? I don't have much to add other than I'm still being put through this shit storm. I can't say I wish I didn't have kids. Because they are great. I guess I wish I had them with a better person. That's not to say I am without flaws, but I ended up being a means to an end. 600 a paycheck. Plus. I hope my son, who may not actually be my son, does better. Life is hard. I hope others learn from my mistakes l.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/24 03:42 PM
2

That's why I'm here. Telling people what they need to hear as soon as possible. All the things I'd wish I'd known. This sub should be required reading for men.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 07:12 PM
3

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 12:03 PM
10

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 12:03 PM
8

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 04:47 AM
1

I wish I knew all this sooner, too. I did everything wrong. All I can do now is try to help other men. This sub should be required reading for any man thinking of marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 06:33 PM
2

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 03:37 AM
3

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 03:37 AM
5

Fight it. Fight it now. Like your life depends on it.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 03:37 AM
2

I hear you, man. I'm just telling others what I wish I had heard the week I needed it. All of this happened to me and more. By the time I had all this information, it was too late. I did everything wrong. We carry on.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 03:32 AM
3

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 11:31 PM
10

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 11:31 PM
9

Well written. I appreciate you. We've really been put through hell, haven't we.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/24 01:49 PM
6

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 03:22 AM
7

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 03:21 AM
1

I stole this comment from a post because I liked it so much.
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 03:27 PM
1

So what you have is the classic disconnect between the programing you have been taught, and the reality you directly observe. There is nothing in biology that drives men to marry. I am NOT saying marriage is wrong / bad. I am saying that it's a cultural, religious and social institution. Which helps promote stable societies, raise children / new members of the society, and function. However, that is currently a delusion in 2023. Marriage is also a legal status, based on a contract you sign with …
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 03:25 PM
1

We all make mistakes, and no one is perfect. The truth is that women and men are built differently. Once a man understands women a bit better, he may choose not to engage with them any further (mgtow) or limit engagement to short-term flings. We all want a good partner in life. Truth be told, till death due us part ain't what it used to be. Men are the only true romantics, in my opinion. In your case, the chances are she has found someone else and has already moved on. You just weren't informed …
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 03:24 PM
9

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/24 10:29 PM
9

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/24 10:29 PM
2

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 04:23 AM
11

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 04:23 AM
1

I agree that there is a lot of hurt in this sub, and for good reason. Your points are all valid. There is definitely something wrong with the divorce system in almost every country. Documentaries have been made. I don't know why a good portion of divorces need to destroy someone. But I tell you. It truly sucks being on the tail end of it. It seems the rules are made to be sure that the state doesn't need to take care of any more kids than it has to.. It seems that men are viewed as expendable wo…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 01:00 AM
2

I've been too kind and have been taken advantage of. In the end, the people who matter (my kids) will see the truth. If I live that long. We shall see.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 02:24 AM
2

Well. I'm glad it works out okay for some of us.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 02:12 AM
3

Some people will never acknowledge their mistakes. Personality disorders may play a part. Looking back, it's all so clear. I was just a means to an end. I work 12 hours a day. She works 12 hours a week. She has a home. With my kids. If they are mine. I'm functionally homeless. Ya.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 02:07 AM
2

I take the high road. I'm calm, kind, and reasonable. Basically, we are opposites. I'm playing the long game. Eventually, the kids will realize. It's been hard not to argue. Sometimes, I'll write a response. Then, wait 24 hours before sending. Often, what I send is not what I wrote. I act friendly. Honestly, I'm so hurt. I carry on.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 02:03 AM
3

I've always been reasonable. When someone destroys your life.Your future life. Lies about you. Steals from you. Cheats on you and tells you it's all your fault it leaves a bit of a sour taste in your mouth.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 01:59 AM
4

Sorry. I was just saying that most divorces are not that easy due to one or more people being overly difficult. I fully agree with the lawyers being a waste of money. I could have put both my kids through college with the money I spent on lawyers, and I'm not done yet.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 01:55 AM
2

Good luck lol
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 01:32 AM
1

That sounds like a calm and reasonable way to settle things. Something two men would do. I applaud your civility. I hope you guys can continue to be awesome parents. Unfortunately, all you have to do is read the comments on this one thread to understand that it's not usually how it goes. My own story is as bad as you can imagine, and I've learned a lot since then. Let's just say I've been left with nothing but trust issues.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 08:43 PM
2

This story is my story. Well. Probably a lot of ours.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 08:39 PM
26

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 03:29 PM
6

It's a trap!
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 03:28 PM
7

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/24 03:04 AM
2

It's a tough world out there. Tougher without good friends. I'm so glad I have a handful of men I can count on. Heads up kings. It's not always easy.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 08:26 PM
11

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 12:31 AM
7

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 12:31 AM
3

Don't call her sweetie. That tramp doesn't deserve a kind word like that.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 11:19 PM
2

Well said. Accountability is only for men, though. Remember that. An illegal recording proving your innocence is better than bogus charges any time.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 02:08 PM
2

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 07:20 PM
3

Welcome to the fucking club. This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 07:20 PM
3

An illegal recording proving your innocence is better than going to jail.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/24 12:31 PM
4

The main character part is called female SOLIPSISM. Here, check this out. : This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to g…
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/24 05:21 PM
14

This is a cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have caused t…
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/24 04:23 PM
3

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 09:33 PM
3

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 09:33 PM
5

Exercise and cut out the drugs and alcohol. Give it some time. You're going through hell. Your brain is trying to process the shit she's put you through. I wish you the best, man.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 03:01 PM
14

Ya. Or she's cheating now.... projection.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 04:01 AM
7

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 02:17 PM
12

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 02:16 PM
9

Melt it down into a .45 boolit and fire it into my brain if I ever think of marriage again.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 06:49 PM
2

This sub should be required reading for every man at a certain age. The young ones who stumble upon it have made posts before. They were terrified.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 03:55 AM
3

You too. Happy New Year.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 09:24 PM
4

I have to believe that if I'm am calm, kind, and don't talk shit about their mother, my children will eventually see how wrong what their mother did to me is. How much they have missed out on because of her. I plan on staying around to see them reach that conclusion. That is my hope. I miss my kids when I'm not with them. They're pretty great little people. I also went through a time when it was video calls only due to false allegations. Today, I took my kids skating. Hang in there. It gets bett…
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 09:23 PM
5

It's been a tough 3 years for me. There are lots of ups and downs. Try going for a walk. Any exercise helps. Bike ride, whatever. It always helped me. Why didn't people warn us.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 09:14 PM
2

Oh man, I hear ya. Best of luck to you.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 09:11 PM
1

Amen.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/23 09:18 PM
1

According to the state and half the population, it is our job to suffer. They just don't say it out loud. Many women use terrible tactics to try to separate us from our children. Wealth. Homes. Sanity. We must stay strong. Be the rock in our children's lives. Teach our children. Almost all of our children will eventually see and understand what happened and why. This is what I have to live for.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/23 11:09 PM
2

Yes, sir. Big donkey balls.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 12:39 AM
1

At this point, it doesn't matter much. Only affects the s7 expenses. My income is all that matters for most things. If I do a good job. Get promoted. Make more. She gets more. Kinda fucks with your head. But I guess the kids are well taken care of...
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 12:39 AM
3

Canada 2 kids I make about 100k a year. She makes 50 ish She works for her parents, and they hide her income. I work 12 hours a day She works 12 hours a week She also gets the child tax breaks from the government She has custody because she got a bogus protection order on me so she could steal my home and keep my kids from me We split the cost of insurance for the kids I pay 1200 monthly. Plus, 2/3 of extracurricular like pre-school. I pay half for swimming lessons, gym, etc, for the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 12:05 PM
5

As far as it being good and then being cold again. It may have to do with how her other relationships are going. RE : MONKEY BRANCHING. as previously explained. Sorry.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 06:02 AM
10

You're right to be confused. You're right to feel disenfranchised. Most of us have been hurt terribly. We thought we were doing well. Or at least OK. We thought we had someone we loved. That loved us. Until we didn't. We give you these cold truths for a reason. I've spent 3 years on this sub and still did and am doing it wrong. We write for the betterment of men, of people just like us. What could we have done better. What we fucked up. I don't know all your details but like you said our stories…
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 05:59 AM
10

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 03:37 AM
13

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 03:36 AM
6

This guy knows.
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/23 10:07 AM
7

I don't have any advice. This sucks. I have a feeling that down the road, the kids will hate her for this. Oh. And I highly doubt her new relationship will last anything close to long term.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/23 03:19 PM
8

This is another cut and paste I stole : I call this the light-switch effect. And it happens when a woman is no longer attracted to you and is moving on, whether or not she cheated. It's not that she's discrediting all the past good in the relationship, she actually believes it never existed. Let me expand on that a little, and tie it into what we call Briffault's law. Women use their emotional state to define reality- we already know this. When a man feels an emotion, he asks, what could have ca…
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/23 03:33 AM
9

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/23 03:32 AM
2

This guy lives..
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/23 03:42 AM
5

Yup.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/23 12:44 AM
6

Well said. The kids' and child's support complicates the separation part, as you said. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/23 12:11 PM
3

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/23 02:54 AM
2

Reasonable. May have its cost in the end, though.
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/23 02:57 AM
8

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/23 02:44 AM
4

First of all. I'm not familiar with your state laws as I don't live in your country. Women want control. As control equals income from you. This will have to be settled by the courts as women are not reasonable in separation or divorce. This is based on experience. If you want proper time with your children, you will have to fight for it. Unfortunately, the courts are meant to drain money from you. They literally have no other purpose in family matters. Get the protection order thrown out for be…
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 05:01 PM
2

You need that order of protection thrown out and fight for 50 50. Congrats on your sobriety. That's a big step.
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 04:06 PM
8

Your story is the same as mine, but I'm in Canada. This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be…
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 04:03 PM
2

Thank you. I needed this today.
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/23 09:30 PM
3

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/23 03:34 PM
6

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/23 02:51 AM
6

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/23 03:03 AM
1

Feeling good. No More Mr Nic7e Guy. Leave a cheater gain a life. Cheating in a nutshell Storms can't hurt the sky Meditations by Aurelius The obstacle is the way The road less traveled Atomic habits The body keeps the score The rational male How to win friends and influence people Models BIFF I think that should have you covered.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/23 03:53 PM
5

The person you loved is gone. I'm sorry for your loss. When she says she changed her mind and wants you back, it just means she's back to plan b or c. Or whatever she has you at for this point. Alimony and child support suck. Go for 50/50 or more if you can. Be kind to yourself and take great care of the kids. Remember, it's a marathon, not a sprint. I'm just trying to make sure you don't stumble right at the starting line like I did.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 04:36 AM
6

Pay attention to the part about the protection order and get yourself a recording device or 2 and always have them on. Or cameras better yet. Expect he'll once you file. But don't back down. An illegal recording that refutes false allegations is better than no recording.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 04:27 AM
12

Moving on from a woman is easy. Unless you have kids. I can't offer you much help as I have done everything wrong. I'm still doing everything wrong. Be there for your kids. Be the stoic philosophical rock in their life. The calm one. The one who is there when they need someone. They'll get it. It might take 10 years, but kids aren't stupid. They will see who fought for them and who replaced their loved one with an idiot or a trail of fuckboys. The list is accurate. It's been gathered with love f…
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 04:24 AM
38

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 04:06 AM
1

Did it in a hurry. Plus it's easier to click on? Lol
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 11:55 PM
2

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 01:30 AM
1

This book is called surviving parental alienation. I read it. It helped. It basically says don't give up, and they will come around. If your ex is causing this, your child will see it. It might take years but they will see the truth in the end. That you took the high road. You didn't talk shit about other people. You were there when you needed them and would have been there more if you could have. But you couldn't. Stay strong brother. https://www.amazon.ca/Surviving-Parental-Alienation-Journey-…
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 01:25 AM
3

Raising good humans. How to stop losing your shit with your kids. No drama discipline. How to talk so little kids will listen No More Mr Nice Guy. The road less traveled. Feeling good. And maybe something on stoicism. Good luck[]
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/23 11:19 PM
2

This is a copy pasta I share with everyone who needs it. Most of this will apply to you. If you think part of it does not apply just wait a bit... this is what is known as the list. Feel free to add to it. It will only help others. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure…
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/23 01:53 PM
2

OK, perfect. I'll fix it. Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 02:44 AM
2

That is a great book. Could you kindly tell me what the correction is so I can fix the "list?"
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 02:11 AM
6

Copy pasta for all the new guys here. Most will apply. Some won't. Good luck. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm. Drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm, you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure she is going to try to get an EPO (emergency protection order) against you. All she has to say is that there is escalating behavior, and she is afraid …
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 01:45 AM
1

That's right. Fellas, if this happens to you, start making your way to the door. She is working on her monkey branching.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/23 02:03 PM
1

Exactly the same for me. Almost all of it. Let me know if there is anything I should add to "the list."
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/23 12:50 AM
2

Na man. I've done everything wrong. I'm just trying to help others with the help I needed at the beginning. This sub has been very helpful though. Go check out r/mensrights
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/23 05:43 PM
4

Probably not the best idea to put an app on her phone. I'm sure it would break some law. It would be wise to record interactions. I use cube acr. It's free. Or you can buy the better version for your phone. It records phone calls and you can use it just as a recorder in your pocket. Check your local laws regarding recording. An illegal recording of something proving your innocence is better than no recording at all.
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/23 02:11 PM
15

This is a copy pasta that I share with the new guys here. Some or all of it may apply to you. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure she is going to try to get an EPO (emergency protection order) against you. All she has to say is there is escalating behavior and she is…
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/23 02:07 PM
1

Remember... whats hers is hers and what's yours is hers. Did you forget how it works? /s
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 09:57 PM
3

You're welcome. Good luck, whatever you are going through to make youbask this question.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 08:27 PM
5

Next time when some one shows me that I am not a reasonably high priority in their life, I'm going to show myself the door. I wish I had made better choices in the past, but I can't change that now. Just wish I hadn't had kids with her.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 07:49 PM
12

She would change what she was doing on her phone when i would walk into the room. She was texting/fucking exes. She would not respond to my messages during the day like she used to. Yet still post online. She randomly started trying to lose weight .... for her affair partner. She would yell at me if I offered her more delicious food that I was trying to keep her fat. Less sex. Obviously. Man, I was such a fool. Read "no more Mr nice guy". Good luck brother.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 04:12 PM
2

Wow, a woman who refuses responsibility for her actions... very surprising. Lol. Thank you for sharing, man. Stay strong.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 02:41 PM
2

It's a catch-all list. I'm just trying to help. This sub was super helpful to me,and I'm just trying to give back. My life is shit. I've got 9 cents to get me though the next week and a half after paying child support and all. Fuck
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 03:44 PM
1

Cube acr. Free app. Start recording before getting near. You can still record video on top. Interrupted by phone calls to record the phone call (use speaker phone). Restart after. Buy for cheap for better features.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 02:20 AM
1

Yes. It's pretty good. I just finished reading it the second time. I also enjoyed models by Mark Manson. As well as Feeling Good by David Burns. I also took a dive into stoic literature. For obvious reasons. Never stop learning.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 05:27 PM
4

Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure she is going to try to get an EPO (emergency protection order) against you. All she has to say is there is escalating behavior and she is afraid for her life and boom. It'll cost you 10k minimum to fight it and have it thrown out. …
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 03:33 PM
2

I do believe that is a common theme. Stay strong, sir.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 03:21 AM
2

Let's all hear em.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/23 11:09 PM
2

When the ex and I first broke up, happy couples were all I could see. Now I know better. Now I know not all of them are happy. They may just look that way. Im sure some of them are very happy together, and thats great. Look for happiness within yourself. Do what you love to do. If you find someone that compliments you and your life, then so be it. I'm not going to be unhappy to make someone else's life easier anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/23 06:37 PM
1

Stay strong man.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/23 02:38 PM
14

Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure she is going to try to get an EPO (emergency protection order) against you. All she has to say is there is escalating behavior and she is afraid for her life and boom. It'll cost you 10k minimum to fight it and have it thrown out. …
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/23 12:11 PM
2

So. Most of us really do have the same story..... thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/23 01:26 PM
2

Thank you sir.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/23 03:06 AM
3

I have also made my own "list" and share it when necessary. I wish I had been enlightened sooner. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure she is going to try to get an EPO (emergency protection order) against you. All she has to say is there is escalating behavior and sh…
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/23 01:49 PM
5

This guy's doing the lords work over here. Thank you for your service.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/23 01:00 PM
7

You are correct. 75% done second read through.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 01:26 AM
2

Some advice... More of this will apply than you think... Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure she is going to try to get an EPO (emergency protection order) against you. All she has to say is there is escalating behavior and she is afraid for her life and boom. It'll …
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/22 04:03 AM
2

There are many man who were treated the same as you. Including me. You and I are the same in many ways. They hand out those EPOs like fucking candy on Halloween. It's bullshit. Then they use the fact that they have that as a bargaining chip to get you to sign whatever they want you to sign. You need to record everything. Every text. Every phone call. Every interaction. In Canada you can record any conversation that you are a part of. You need to do that. You need to get her on tape threatening t…
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 03:44 AM
1

I don't see why not. What was the reasoning for the supervised only visitation to start? Be prepared to show why you want it.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 03:18 AM
1

What's the reasoning for the supervised visitation? It sounds like you need time with the kids unsupervised. The more the better. As for being treated like a second class citizen that's pretty standard. Sadly, parental alienation is extremely common. Luckily judges are coming around to watching out for it a little more. We're not there yet though. You'll most likely need to go to court to get a change in the interim order. Be prepared for a fight. Her being difficult needs to be documented and s…
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 03:11 AM
3

Was it a final agreement or an interim agreement? In order to make changes to a final agreement you may need to show something has changed. Have you kept track of all requests of visitation as well as her reactions? Recordings or screenshots? In order to show she has been unwilling or unreasonable in the denials of visitation if you take this to court. The wording of your agreement will also be of importance. If it says she can deny a visit for any reason then she has more power to do that. I wo…
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 02:08 AM
3

Honestly it's not a one answer question. You should definitely wait longer than you think is right. It's not fair to introduce children to someone and have them lose them. Children need solid relationships to help them become properly developed adults. Be a good influence and don't rush in.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 04:13 PM
35

6 weeks isn't long enough. Please wait longer.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 03:57 AM
6

Seems like you're looking for some kind of closure. I'm quite sure some of us don't get that.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/22 03:07 AM
1

You're very welcome. Any suggestions for edits?
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/22 11:33 PM
2

It's mostly taken from other men who have gone through the same bs. It is part of what is known as "the list". You can Google it. This is just my take based on my shit experience. Feel free to suggest anything I missed.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/22 04:41 PM
3

I made this list to help others through what I went through. I learned so much from others in this group and others when shit went down. If you have anything to add or subtract let me know. So many men will need to hear this unfortunately. Sad.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/22 02:19 PM
6

No problem man. Lots of good guys here with good advice that's better than mine. I've been in a shit spot too and I pulled through. Be strong. Do some research. Get some exercise and rest. I know the rest part can be difficult. We men love deeply and are fixers by nature.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/22 02:59 AM
21

Advice. Ya. I have some. Don't drink. It'll only hurt the situation. Trust me. You need to stay calm drinking will not help with this. Do not lose your temper. If you do not stay calm you will lose. She wants you to get upset. She wants to be able to call the cops on you. You can be darn sure she is going to try to get an EPO (emergency protection order) against you. All she has to say is there is escalating behavior and she is afraid for her life and boom. It'll cost you 10k minimum to fight it…
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/22 02:50 AM
42

Ditch the drinking. It well help I promise. Do it for yourself. Your loved ones will also benefit. Look at my post history. Then go check out my friends at r/stopdrinking Best of luck to you.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/22 12:57 AM
4

Is that over the counter or do I need a prescription?
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/22 04:05 AM
1

Promote this man.
/r/seduction25/05/22 03:08 AM
21

Botox. Says it helped with headaches... I wonder if I get botox if she'll go away....
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/22 01:14 AM
7

That's a great answer. I'm not OP but thanks for sharing man.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/22 02:53 PM
11

No. You are not alone. That's fuggin for sure.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/22 03:35 AM
2

I recently read Surviving Parental Alienation by Amy Baker and Paul Fine. It was kind of helpful. Sure opened my eyes to all the red flags I missed along the way. Good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/21 12:58 AM
3

Thank you. You as well.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/21 10:33 PM
10

Just did my budget myself. I'm pretty fucked.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/21 10:19 PM
3

Good. Education is your friend. Arm yourself with knowledge. Exercise. Learn to meditate. Learn to remain calm and rational when dealing with her insanity. Once you've learned this fucking teach me because Its hard.
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/21 12:14 AM
3

Dude. Read about the grey rock method. I recommend BIFF for coparent communication. Here is a link to it on Amazon. I got it for Kindle and read it in a day. It will help. Good luck. https://www.amazon.ca/BIFF-Co-Parent-Communication-Difficult-Emails/dp/1950057100/ref=asc_df_1950057100/?tag=googlemobshop-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=459469907193&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=7127708581601369515&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9001185&hvtargid=pla-936681229107&psc=1
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 06:19 PM
4

You commented this on another post. Still gold. You are doing good work my friend.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/21 09:28 PM
2

You sir are a Saint.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/21 04:10 PM
3

Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/21 03:26 AM
1

Thank you. I think this is what I needed to hear.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/21 01:30 PM
2

This is a great post. Well thought out and well written. Thank you.
/r/seduction29/06/21 01:36 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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