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15

username_6916/r/MensRights23/02/14 08:53 PM
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 1,014 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

A positive form of domiance would be standing up for that person, confronting others who are doing something out of line. Ah, but that can be bullying too. See the excesses of call-out culture when folks look for ever smaller slights to call out, publicly shame and humiliate and harass. At some point yes, you have to draw a line between aggressor and defender. But it's not always clear cut and folks who are good at power tend to know how to weaponize that to their advantage in terms their own so…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 09:51 PM
1

There’s positive forms of dominance that most women would find attractive and then there’s negative forms of dominance most would find unattractive. And I think most of the 'positive forms of dominance' that you admit women find attractive are in fact jerk behavior. The middle school bully who's words anger some other boy to tears is showing his ability to act 'act with courage, confidence, self-control, and integrity'. He has so much control compared to the guy he provoked. He's so clever. That…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 07:20 PM
1

Yes. And I have turned down women in real life for this reason. Not just because I think it would make them jealous or insecure or mad but because I fear it would more directly make me worse husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 11:37 AM
2

People who go on about how nice they are … that’s a red flag. Genuine nice people don’t do that and they certain don’t act like that their niceness should entitle them to someone dating them. This reasoning feels like a "Have you stopped beating your wife?" kind of double bind. Deny being nice and you've admitted it. Claim it and you're clearly not nice because you claim it. What most women want are good men. And a good man is a strong man. Is that so? Why do we call authoritarians 'strongmen' t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 05:51 AM
2

That’s a thing a very larger percentage of humanity has done. It’s not a 38 billion dollar level of impact to the world. Sure. but there's the concept of an 'equity stake' in the marriage, just as the Bezos' had (and have) and equity stake in Amazon. By contributing to the marriage, you're entitled to a chunk of what that marriage creates. If you dissolve the marriage, particularly due to the misconduct of the other party, you're entitled to get your own stake back out. I have issues with no-fau…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 11:21 AM
0

Except men aren't a minority. You have it flipped. Men literally are a minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 08:18 AM
1

Funny thing is ‘cancelled’ celebs basically broke more popular than ever. Great news if you're a celebrity. Not so great news if you work in fast food and your livelihood is taken from you because you posted something completely defensible that still provoked the mob to harass your employer. Which one do you think is close to most 'cancellations'? You’re talking about women saying mean things, I’m talking about men casually discussing reducing rights and justifying it via women saying mean thing…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 08:13 AM
3

“ Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them” I always think this would be better written as "Women are afraid that men will kill them. Men are afraid that women will get other men to kill them on their behalf". What do you think a good chunk of lynchings were?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 08:11 AM
1

I kinda understand the post... But... Look, I'm still playing TF2 here.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 11:49 AM
2

And the opposite of that is frequently read as "never speak to women in public" is is just great for one's odds at dating and courtship.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 10:53 PM
1

So... It's a lie? Or an exaggeration?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 10:25 PM
2

No one told men this. Lots of people told me this. Men should be nice and pro-social because it's the right thing to do, not because it entitles them to a relationship that they whine about when they don't get. When is a man permitted to fell frustration or disappointment about their struggles finding a partner? If a man needs outside incentive to be a decent person, they're a terrible person. This seems like such an odd claim. Don't we all need outside incentives to be decent people? We're made…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 09:24 PM
1

This feels like a catch 22. We're told all the time to lower our standards, that our desires are shallow and predatory and not all that important, that we ask too much of women and that we have to compromise. But if we do that, you don't want that either?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 08:51 PM
–

"The work" of forging and maintaining a relationship is very different that 'the work' of dating. And most of the skills and effort doesn't really translate.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 08:51 PM
–

Either way, you're here because lots of people around you 'live for others'.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 08:48 PM
–

Is there any worthwhile goal in life that doesn't involve 'living to others'?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 08:48 PM
5

But the process of building rapport had to start somewhere. There was a point at which you were cold to them. If you're new to some community, everyone you meet is going to be a 'cold approach'.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 12:34 PM
7

But surely there's some point where you're the new person in the in whatever arts, civic or hobby group, or school or job you're involved in and every interaction is itself a cold approach, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 10:58 AM
11

In a world where cold approaches are wholly prohibited, how do you even have a social circle in the first place?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 10:11 AM
16

At let me guess, you also regard men asking out their friends as predatory too?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 08:27 AM
4

But every friend you have begins as a stranger.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 08:17 AM
5

Some feelings are negative. Like resentment and anger. Meaning, if you've gotten to that point you actually did not open up at all. You let it fester and now everyone thinks you're crazy. Exactly, you're not allowed to open up because they're negative things and thus impose a burden on other people. You might feel them, but you can never show it because others will see you crazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 09:45 AM
8

See, exactly the attitude I'm talking about. Emotional intelligence means men aren't allowed to have feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:32 AM
7

I feel like it's the exact opposite: Avoiding burdening other people with your problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 12:09 AM
2

Consulting, engineering, tailoring, baking, baking, driving, barbering, nursing and services more broadly are not things either. Yet we trade for them and with them all the time in the broader economy. The 'tangible'/'intangible' bits are not what makes the difference here.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 11:16 PM
1

Relationships also can’t be hoarded in the same way money and access to resources can be (violently) hoarded from you. This feels almost entirely backwards to me. The supply of potential partners is quite fixed in a way that the total wealth within society is not. We can't really 'grow the pie' with regards to people the way we can with wealth.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 06:09 AM
-1

My house has yet to seize up because I haven't vacuumed in a while.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 12:31 AM
2

What, you never allow anything to soak in water and soap to loosen burned on dried material?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 12:28 AM
1

And there move the goalposts. You said no feminist would do anything like this, now you turn around and you're down with feminists supporting assassinating people for disagreeing with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 09:53 PM
–

We're not and they're not. To the extent China has had massive economic growth in the late 20th and early 21st centuries, it's been because they've moved away the centrally planned economy towards a system of governance that allows much greater economic freedom.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 04:52 AM
1

You sound exactly like conservatives telling me antifa isn't actually about anti fascism Well, the actually right about this: Antifa is not "anti-fascism" for any definition of "fascism" that any supporter of capitalist liberal democracy would recognize. But the concept is much the same: It's an appeal to the using different meanings of words. The USSR defined all sorts of things that we'd recognize as liberal democracy as fascism, this was the definition used by Antifaschistische Aktion which w…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 04:49 AM
–

It isn't. We're much better off having had Reagan as President over Carter and Mondale.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 04:43 AM
5

I’m actually more upset about those that have less than me, people deserve dignity. And yet you favor policies that would result in them have fewer material resources? You're working under what I regard to be the strange assumption that wealth is the cause of poverty. I don't think that's true. The same free markets and property rights that let people become billionaires are the ones that give me and everyone less well off then me more material goods than they'd otherwise have. people don’t earn…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 01:48 AM
-3

Tell me more about how life under Stalin, Mao, Hitler, Castro, Allende, Chavez and Mudaro is so much better for men. Or Trump and FDR for that matter. Tax cuts 'for the rich' benefited the average man under Ronald Reagan by increasing both overall economic activity and overall tax revenue.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 12:15 AM
11

Take away markets and capitalism and replace it with an endless political game of who curries favor with whom and everyone, both men and women, will be poorer.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 10:30 PM
6

In my mind, this is a lot of 'begging the question'. Is it really a fact that more economic central planning is good for men? I find class warfare arguments to be deeply destructive and usually based on little more than envy. "If only that guy had less money, the world would be a better place" is rarely true in capitalist world where the way you get money is serving your fellow human beings.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 10:07 PM
9

Wait, how is making men poorer through economic central planning benefiting them?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 09:24 PM
5

Apparently disagreeing about politics is worse than... Murder? Huh...
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 08:59 PM
3

Isn't this a circular argument? We know they're hateful because they're incels and we know that they're incels because they're hateful?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 08:30 PM
2

Present a female post laughing at victims of a slaughter and feminists laughing with her. Shoot, a lot of feminist responses to the assassination of Charley Kirk certain qualify.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 08:27 PM
4

Are you dreaming of one and only? Yes?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 03:06 AM
2

Who says the mask has to come off? We all wear different masks for different places in life. The 'real' you is the person you choose to be. Yes, that's influenced by those around you. Is that so bad?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 11:11 PM
3

What is the actual person? Does a person become less actual if they're consciously making decisions to be more attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 07:18 PM
5

I don't think it was just the Internet though. I think a bunch of this attitude ended up in campus and corporate sexual harassment 'training'. And that's not an unreasonable read: You have no idea if your advances would be welcome before you do them and any unwanted advance is harassment by the material they state; it's a reasonable conclusion to reach the conclusion of 'don't do this at all here'. This can be defensible in some cases: Not every space need serve as a place to find a partner. But…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 09:35 AM
4

Are you really so uncreative that you can’t think of any in-between zone between a cold approach of a stranger and a friend you’ve known for years? Not really with the arguments presented the way they are. The argument of 'you weren't really their friend, you just wanted to get into their pants' applies long before you've known someone for years. And the 'you don't really know anything about her' applies well after the first meeting. Is it that really inconceivable that someone might see these c…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 08:29 AM
8

If you can't figure out how to think of others in your day to day and have to literally remove yourself from the dating pool out of fear, then that's on you. You can easily be respectful and thoughtful of others and be normal about it, without taking yourself out of the dating pool. And let me guess, approaching strangers to ask them out is not respectful and thoughtful of others. They don't know you, they're just going about their day. You're just in it because you think they look pretty. And a…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:54 AM
12

why can't confident men who approach also be decent? plenty of decent men already in relationships btw, every day thousands probably get in relationships. Weren't they supposed to listen to women and learn that expressing interest is not welcome and is a low-grade form of sexual harassment like the feminists told them to?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:48 AM
1

Are you…serious? Yes. You think no one starves in the U.S. for economic reasons? Yes. Can you find a death due to starvation outside of medical conditions or wilderness survival int he US? And then defend it. Like “we don’t have a choice but to be cucks to our billionaire overlords”. The rights we preserve for billionaires are the rights we ourselves enjoy. There are a hundred solutions and they still allow the US to build wealth. Not really. We already have one of the world's most progressive t…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 09:45 PM
1

The things that create wealth are the things that create wealth inequality: Private property, free markets, free trade, rule of law. We already live in a country where nobody starves for economic reasons. You want to give that up to have no billionaires?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 06:32 AM
1

the issue is that there is such insane wealth and equality, that some people on earth have disgustingly exorbitant wealth, while others are starving. We need to just make everyone starve equally then? We live in an age where the percentage of the human population living in abject poverty has never been smaller. I think that the same forces that create the inequality you decry also create the wealth is responsible for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 07:12 PM
3

Ironically, it's men who are more likely to vote for conservative policies that....surprise, surprise...result in fucking over the average struggling American. And I just happen to think that this is... in a word... wrong. The poor become richer when we do away with minimum wage. The world becomes safer and less likely to enter a major when the US is stronger militarily. A lot of resources spend on social services go to the old and relatively rich and these would be better off invested in the pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 07:01 PM
1

Given the current 14th amendment jurisprudence... Yeah? I'm trying to think of a major case that would go another way if the Equal Rights Amendment were ratified.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 06:56 PM
3

Or the kind of person who has higher wages and is better at interviewing is more likely to get married?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/26 07:54 PM
-2

Women generally consume more social welfare and contribute less in taxes. And the modern welfare state dates to what, the 1930s? We had civilization before Social Security and Medicare existed. There is an argument here about how these programs replace part of the role of the husband with the state. We have government programs to do a lot of what men bring to the relationship. Women get what they want from the state, so what do men have to barter in a relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 06:57 PM
-4

There's a lot of social welfare programs forcing men to give their money to women who do not want him.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 06:20 PM
1

They also don't have to deal with pregnancy and being the default parent that usually has to give up their life and career for raising kids And women don't have the pressure of "make more money than me or I'll lose attraction to you" the way men do. I've never really understood this complaint, my entire purpose in having a career is to provide for my wife and family. My career is (or perhaps was) the sacrifice.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 06:11 PM
1

1) Most millionaires do not receive an inheritance at all 2) How is receiving an inheritance exploitive?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 06:39 AM
1

Except most billionaires didn't get their wealth from being exploitative. They get their wealth by owning and building productive things like businesses. The exceptions tend to appear in less capitalistic societies, where wealth follows power and power is the only way to get wealth.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 01:29 AM
-1

Correct. Noone is in charge. People's interests are often in conflict on an individual level. And, broadly speaking we don't want a society that's based on envy and resentment of the successful because that's bad for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 01:17 AM
2

This feels like a non-sequitur. What does this have to do with danger again?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 09:42 PM
0

They want men and women to fight each other so we ignore the hoarding of wealth at the top. There is no They. And there is no such thing as hoarding wealth in a capitalist system.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 08:46 PM
3

Birth is more dangerous than most dangerous jobs done by men. According to the CDC: "In 2023, 669 women died of maternal causes in the United States". Meanwhile 4,832 men died on the job in the United States.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 08:44 PM
1

I've always interpreted "Just be yourself" to mean that, you either do that, or play a character for your whole life. But we all do play different characters in different parts our life. One's role as the boss at work might be different than the role as doing the grunt work in a volunteer organization. One's role as father to one's children is be different than being a good husband to one's wife. This feels like saying "If you have to think about it, your not being authentic" and to me this just…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/26 09:49 PM
2

Raising your voice is scary and immature. If you can’t control your emotional reactions like an adult, then don’t expect people to stick around and get yelled at. Are you really telling me that you're able to so completely suppress your emotions that there isn't even the slightest hint of emotion in your voice? In my mind there's no genuine expression of excitement or frustration or anger or sadness that doesn't involve "raising your voice".
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/26 12:53 AM
–

My own experience isn't really one of regret for being anti-SJW or anti-feminist. It's regret for giving as much consideration to the feminists as I did in the first place. It's not Steven Crowder or Ben Shapario or Christina Hoff Sommers or Jordan Peterson or Cathy Young or David French who made me afraid to ask a woman out on a date. It's the feminists who wrote stuff like "Schrodinger's rapist".
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/26 08:05 PM
2

What makes something an 'acceptable' social space and somewhere else not that? Like, exactly what criteria are we using here? Nobody has ever been able to articulate that to me, but I can find someone who objects to a man expressing desire in just about every environment.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/25 10:16 AM
21

Why is it that turning a dude down is the same as treating that guy as nothing? There's nothing wrong with turning a guy down. What I object to is the demand that he not even be permitted to talk to you in the first place to spare you the burden of turning him down.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/25 10:08 AM
9

And that still smarmy asshole behavior in my book. It's fundamentally dishonest, to be cocky is to lie about what it is you're capable of. Modesty and humility are virtues. Cockiness and confidence are vices.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 07:24 AM
8

It kinda does. Cocky requires you to assert dominance over others. I think that's the definition of asshole behavior on some level.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 06:14 AM
0

Confidences is a sign of bad character and treating others badly in my view.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 06:04 AM
10

It is possible to be a cocky, nice guy Not really. Cockiness isn't compatible with kindness.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 06:03 AM
5

So what do you do if someone isn't intimidated and still insults you or your honor? Are you going to do the gentile thing, or are you going to "not take shit from anyone" and start a fight over it? Do you see how these are in conflict?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 06:02 AM
6

You really can't. If you're going to take the "doesn't take shit from anybody" kind of 'I must defend my honor' approach to life, you can't ge gentle.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 11:59 PM
1

If you talk about it, you might have to hear them say it clearly that they aren’t interested in. Or by talking about it too soon you'll make them uninterested when otherwise they would have been.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/25 04:17 PM
5

I'd argue that they're 'red pill' because they're unhappy more than they're unhappy because they're 'red pill'.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/25 12:47 PM
14

And what exactly is that difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 10:58 AM
1

Yeah, if you haven't had the talk that was witnessed and signed by a lawyer and then federal court haven't given you a paper confirmation that you are indeed in a relationship, you can do whatever you want. I thought marriage was governed by state law.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 02:00 PM
5

There’s a reason why women use “emotional intelligence” not just “emotion” as a descriptor "Emotional intelligence" is just a fancy way of saying "keep your feelings to yourself".
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/25 08:45 PM
1

In my experience, not really. Once you're a journeyman Software Engineer, most advancement means spending less time writing code and more time in meetings even if your title technically isn't manager. If you're into perfecting the craft of maintainable and performant implementations of things, there's not a lot of avenues for advancement versus getting into technical leadership and high-level architecture and whatnot. Maybe you'll end up in some highly technical domain and master that. But those…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 01:01 PM
4

Can one not be ambitious in developing a skill that the marketplace doesn't value?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 12:40 PM
1

One can be passionate about doing good work, but not want the promotion and the change in responsibilities it brings. Not every IC wants to be a manager.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 12:35 PM
1

You can use it on the Muslims if you're Christian.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 12:34 PM
1

There is a bear in the woods. For some people, the bear is easy to see. Others don't see it at all. Some people say the bear is tame. Others say it's vicious and dangerous. Since no one can really be sure who's right, isn't it smart to be as strong as the bear? If there is a bear.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/25 03:45 PM
0

Sure, but there should be a broadly applicable standard of acceptable behavior that applies until communicated otherwise. What you're proposing would forbid all approaches because you have no idea how an approach will be received until it happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 08:39 AM
3

We have lots of rules for social interaction. They're called 'manners'. The question OP is raising here is a question of what should be considered good manners, not what will always get results.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 09:52 PM
1

I don’t think that’s a problem but it’s weird to get mad that men who do make a move are successful. Or act like a woman is a bitch for liking a guy who made a move over someone who didn’t. That’s another mark of being a Nice Guy vs a nice guy. The issue is that we're trying to live by a set a of rules that forbids 'making a move' like that because we're relative strangers or because the environment isn't one of the ones that's explicitly approved for having romantic desires in or whatnot. When …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 03:06 PM
11

Particularly when you've been told that being "direct about your intentions" is also predatory.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 03:01 PM
–

The social skills in day to day life are different than the social skills that illicit a romantic spark.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 09:38 PM
1

Aaaaaand we're equating autistic people with abusers. What kind of right wing shithousery is this? Why would that be 'right wing'?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/25 01:18 PM
0

What part of the ops post called autistic men subhuman or even made fun of them? This right here: If I want to sleep with someone it won't make sense to me if she doesn't, because I really want it and Her not being interested is irrelevant. That can very easily be read as "sexually unsuccessful people are actually rapists". And I'd argue not even all that unfairly either.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/25 01:16 PM
3

I mean, if you guys wanna act like you’re jealous of them and use that as justification of being terrible people, there’s nothing more to discuss. Which is why I said the exact opposite. The question here is "what is your definition of a terrible person". I'm fairly certain we can agree that a rapist is terrible person because they're violating the fundamental human rights of their victims. I start to take issue when this somehow gets applied to any conservation with a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/25 01:10 PM
5

Some rapists get away with it for a disturbing long time. And there's lots of 'sexually aggressive and selfish' things someone can do that only involve consenting adults. Not everything that's unethical in terms of personal relationships can be made illegal. These are not behaviors to be emulated to be clear. But it is a sign that being a good person isn't always rewarded when it comes to dating and courtship.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/25 12:59 PM
–

Then being sent to schools that are underfunded, understaffed with teachers that are underpaid. Among other issues. The US has some of the highest per-pupil levels of funding of their public schools in the world. Many of the best funded districts have the most problem with student academic achievement.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/25 10:54 AM
–

Very few people children down for no reason. I do know teachers who help out kids who don’t piss them off. The criteria for grades shouldn't be "do they piss me off". So you’re being sassy towards the person who’s responsible for your grades? Do you think you’re going to sass your boss and keep your job? In a professional setting, yes. Making arguments backed with data is a part of your job. You're supposed to say something when the boss is wrong and if they punish you for it it's a sign of thei…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/25 11:33 PM
–

What if you are quite willing to do the work but you're marked more harshly because you're a boy? What if you're quite willing to do the work, but they refuse to teach you until you have quiet hands? What if you're quite willing to do the work, but being intellectually challenged by a 12 year old is an unbearable insult to someone who just squeaked through their education degree?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/25 11:16 PM
–

Like you do with girls?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/25 11:10 PM
–

Can you cite a single instance where a disparity that favors men isn't “clear proof of patriarchal discrimination!” in your view?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/25 10:43 PM
–

There's a bit of a sampling bias here no? Murder tends to result in longer sentences and higher stakes for the defendant, thus justifying more resources in finding exculpatory evidence for a claim of actual innocnce long after a conviction.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/25 09:50 PM
1

So I wasn’t being uncharitable It's not just uncharitable. It's not even addressing my argument. You are pushing the offensive stereotype that all the LGBT community cares about is sex. These people were being thrown in jail and you can only think about sex. Is there even a single instance of celibate person being thrown in jail for being gay or lesbian? How would anyone even know at that point? The law that was struck down in Lawrence vs Texas criminalized behavior, not identity. It's long been…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/25 11:51 AM
1

Because low IQ bigots obsessed over the sex lives of gay people and wanted to throw them in jail for the crime of being themselves. So "being themselves" necessarily involves sex acts? That's what the crime that that case was looking at and ultimately resulted in SCOTUS ruling such laws unconstitutional. That would mean that the sex itself is the defining aspect of the gay, lesbian and bisexual identity. Isn't that the very point I'm making? If a straight man feels that feminist hysteria is prev…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/25 11:00 AM
0

Thats very telling that you asked that. Asking you to define your terms is 'telling'? Really? Like I said, the fact that you think the only thing they cared about when it came to marriage was sex is very telling and very offensive. Except I said the exact opposite: ...[sex is] not the only thing that gays and lesbians care about in terms of a romantic relationship... That's not even just uncharitable. You're attributing the literal opposite of what I said to me. Let's dig deeper into the argumen…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/25 07:08 AM
2

And comments like these suggest to me that appeals to 'empathy' are just means to cut off rational thought and make in-group preference sound more noble than it really is. The fact you made the entire topic about sex and not about being forced to be who they werent born to be is very telling. And it’s also a very awful stereotype to imply the only thing gay and lesbian care about is sex. It’s especially telling that the only thing you think about when you hear the word marriage is sex. What exac…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/25 11:28 PM
2

These guys claim they want love, but their definition of love is purely reliant on sex. They will sit there and claim that they’re lonely, they feel unloved, they desperately want affection, etc but refuse to go make friends or talk to their family. If sex just really isn't that important, than why aren't the gays and lesbians happy with just being closeted? Why do we need gay marriage then? Isn't the push for such things by the gay and lesbian community just a sign that 'their definition of lov…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/25 09:57 PM
4

Look at the reasons that women say that they file. I "fell out of love"?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/25 07:21 PM
–

That fair enough. But that also means that your broader point isn't really about consent. Which is fine, but I think you should be intellectually more honest about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 10:49 AM
–

You can't buy consent. You can in every other area of life. You can buy consent to me giving you my car or home by giving me enough money for them (that is if I were interesting in selling). I can get the argument that sex is something that should be beyond the marketplace, a bit like friendship and family are. That purely monetary transactions in this area erode the value behind it and cheapen the relationship around it. But that's a fundamentally different point than 'consent'. Shoehorning it …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 10:43 AM
2

Yes, and?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 08:37 AM
1

"do you wish you believed in the BP?" is a very different question than "Do you wish the blue pill was your reality?"
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 04:22 AM
1

The woman the nice guy ended up with probably didn't even know him in high school or college, they haven't even met at that time. So assuming that she would've rejected him because other women did in the past is crazy mental gymnastics. Why shooting yourself in the foot ? Like you are gonna punish a woman who likes you because of your insecurity and past traumas ? I spent my youth dutifully saving myself for my future wife, long before I ever knew who she was. Why? Because I valued being a good …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 05:35 PM
0

Do you view yourselves and other men as "serving corporate overlords" and "being at the mercy of your employers?" These are very different things. I work for a big company, so I'm serving the corporate overlords. They've fired me before, and I wouldn't be surprised if layoffs happen again, so in that sense I'm 'at their mercy'. But they're a big company, not my family. I don't owe them any particular loyalty beyond professional consideration. They don't owe me any loyalty either. The exchange is…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 11:33 PM
1

To wrongs do not necessarily make a right.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:58 AM
10

I just lose sympathy when they start talking about Chad, hypergamy, and not being 6ft tall. Once they've started down that hole it's extremely hard for them to get out. But are these hateful? I get that you disagree on the merits of these arguments and I have my own issues with them, but I'm not convinced that they're a sign of hate.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:31 AM
1

making it harder for the average man to earn a decent wage Are you sure about that?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 03:00 PM
10

One doesn't have to sleep with everyone one they go out with.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 02:17 AM
4

I HATE being cold approached... If however its someone and we start chatting Wouldn't that imply that they already cold approached you to start chatting?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:33 AM
1

"People seek out sweatshops because it’s better than subsistence farming" isn’t the defense you think it is. Goddamn just out here just admitting exploitation thrives on desperation. So you'd rather they be poorer? By your logic feudal serfs "agreed" to work for lords because starvation was the alternative. Medieval lords had people who'd stab you if you left without permission. Bit different than a free market where laborers can and regularly do seek other employment to chase better wages or ot…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:47 PM
0

Your labor is worth what the market pays for it" is the same logic used to justify sweatshops. People seek out jobs in sweatshops because the pay and working conditions are better than the substance farming they did before. I think there's valid concerns around workplace safety that require external intervention, but that's a different question than pay. No one’s labor is "worth" starvation wages. Sure there is. If you can't do anything productive, that's what your labor is worth. Or perhaps eve…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:28 PM
-1

What do you mean 'less than their value'? Did anyone lie about the compensation here? No? Then I fail to see the issue. Prices, including prices for labor, are descriptive not prescriptive. Your labor is worth what the market pays for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 03:55 PM
-4

That makes more sense than you realize. Central planning of romantic partners is going to break down for about the same reasons of central planning of economic transactions would.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:33 AM
-1

Hard disagree. Money is easy to obtain. Dates are not.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:31 AM
-2

No one owes you attraction, just like no one owes billionaires tax breaks. Eh... You have your moral justification backwards. The Billionaire's property is theirs. The burden is on you to justify taxing them in the first place, not on them to justify keeping what they created.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:28 AM
2

Do worse as in have less stable long term relationships? No Can't have an unstable long term relationship if you never get a relationship. Part of getting laid a lot is being pushy about it, just like sociopaths are better at sales. You go into a used car lot, you aren’t looking for a sociopath, but if that lying, sociopathic used car saleman finds you, you just might find yourself overpaying for a lemon. And now do you see why I hate 'confidence'?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 12:59 AM
5

The pool for anyone of worth is actually narrow and the endless dating app matches are an illusion. Having a broader start of the funnel still helps even if it necks down further in the process.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 12:54 AM
1

I find 'confident' people to be very unpleasant most of the time. Not having a shred of self doubt makes it hard to work with, since you'll be very confidently wrong a good deal of the time since there's no mechanism for self-correction.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 12:50 AM
2

Sure, but in the context of liberal, capitalist and democratic countries? The OP's example was being anti-woke, which is very much within the acceptance that everyone has basic human rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 12:45 AM
2

That campus of NYU Tisch. Can the whole world be cool? Pointing to a larger in-group doesn't make the in-group out-group dynamics any different. I'm pretty sure that 'cool' is positional good. The whole point is that you have more of it than someone else. No. Not to me. Your definition of what 'sexy behavior' looked a lot like the kind of personality bullies have to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 04:22 PM
1

Can everyone be 'cool'? Really? What would that look like? Being a bully is never necessary lol. But being a bully does make one more attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 03:53 PM
2

"Equals". Comparison, not assignment.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 03:52 PM
3

This didn’t mean he couldn’t also be kind and considerate person. It kinda does. In order to be cool, somebody has to be uncool. And finding someone to other and make fun of is part of how folks enforce that.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 03:41 PM
4

Nice == Not behaviorally sexy. That's the point here.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 03:29 PM
3

Your definition of asshole is someone who disagrees with your politics or is sad about some part of their life? What does that have to do with how they treat the real flesh and blood people they interact with on a daily basis?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 03:28 PM
–

I'm not sure that computer engineering was ever feminine profession per-se. When the field was nascent, it would have been understood as a part of electronics engineering. Perhaps you're referring to the late 50's-mid 1960s era of computer programming, where a branch of secretarial work got involved with preparing punch cards for the batch processing machines of the era. Sure, some of these women, being smart and educated people, picked up skills in actually designing and developing programs and…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 03:47 PM
1

Then that seems to be a you problem. You made choices in which your entire path is about "winning a woman" at the end. If a woman went out specifically to just get a man to exclusion of her own happiness, failed, and then threw a fit about it, seems like a her problem not a man problem Does this apply to a woman complaining that her male partner doesn't do enough housework? Or is that somehow a societal issue here? A family unit for transactions seems like a nightmare. All relationships are tran…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 03:18 PM
1

I also do not mean “leave us alone” in the sense of “oh no it’s a woman, gotta cross the street so she isn’t afraid.” I mean don’t harass women, don’t date or “befriend” women if you can’t show basic decency and respect, Why the scare quotes around 'befriend'? What is your definition of 'basic decency and respect'? Is it the same when directed at both men and women? don’t try to legislate away other people’s rights just because you may not have access to their bodies. Is anyone actually doing th…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 02:53 PM
1

Because it’s women who are taking care of the kids. I consider that a position of privilege. Mothers get to be the ones who has the deeper emotional ties to your children. Mothers get to be the ones that sees them grow up. It's work, I'm not denying that. But I think it's a lot more personally meaningful.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 01:16 AM
1

I'm sorry but your career path, whichever it is that you chose, isn't a sacrifice you make for a woman. That's a choice you made for yourself, probably when you were 18. Yes it is. When I was 18 a part of why I studied what I did and a part of why I continued despite the pain and difficulty of getting my degree and a part of why I forced myself to go to work every day even when I was completely miserable. The whole pay off here was to provide for a wife and family. Instead it only comes up as a …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 01:12 AM
-1

How is this a sacrifice?? I'd gladly volunteer as tribute here to be paid more. Then what are you doing here? Clearly there's someone that would pay something for the time you're posing on Reddit. Get a second job, work more hours and you'll have more income. That additional income comes at a cost, be it time, physical danger and discomfort, stability, investment or risk. It's fair enough to say you don't want to bare that cost for the additional income. You're not the one asked to provide a liv…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 03:38 PM
-1

Social welfare programs should be based on need of the individual. Men on average make more still so it would make sense that women receive more welfare since there are just more poor women than men. Certainly it wouldn't make sense for the wealthy to be on those programs right? The fact that men earn more on average is a sign of yet another sacrifice that men make for the sake of women or at least of pleasing women. I'd agree gender shouldn't be a factor... but it is logical that women receive …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 03:19 PM
3

This has a tendency to turn into "All of your problems are personal problems and all of mine are human rights issues". For example, feminists going on about how "Manspreading" gets called a human rights issue while men wanting to castrate themselves because they're so terrified of talking to women out of sexual desire because of feminist vilification gets called a personal issue. Women only tend to ask for empathy from strange men in the sense of “if you don’t like us, leave us alone.” I don't t…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 03:15 PM
-2

We should all contribute to society (if able bodied) either through through income or through caring for the sick, elderly or children. Lots of people retire who could work. If men claim that women should pay taxes as part of the social contract then sure, that's reciprocity How about equality in whom benefits from social welfare programs? If the whole reason that women don't want a provider husband anymore is because the state is taking on that role collectively, it means that I'm still stuck a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 02:57 PM
0

Eh, I'm not sure I care one way or another about a clean house within certain bounds actually. If I cared, I'd clean more.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 02:40 PM
1

“Omg, women leave you if you do something stupid to get fired! GOLDDIGGERS!” You don't have to do something stupid to get fired in most jobs.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 02:34 PM
1

But infidelity is seen as much worse than a lot of other other betrayals of trust. Seeing a purely platonic friend against the wishes of a spouse doesn't hit the same way as seeing another romantic partner does. The only difference in behavior here is that one involves sex and the other does not.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 02:09 AM
0

It’s always women who get held to this impossible standard of loyalty and emotional “purity,” while men get a pass. It it an impossible standard? I've spent my life dutifully waiting for my future wife. If it's impossible, how can I exist?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 03:34 PM
1

Sure. But market forces have an effect here, no? If very few people want what you have to offer, you have fewer choices and thus it's less likely that you want what they have to offer.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/25 04:50 PM
4

I think people (both men and women) should choose better when it comes to character. And people should give others a chance when it comes to attraction, chemistry and the 'romantic spark'. These are not conflicting ideas.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/25 04:09 PM
–

Doesn't that investment portfolio that's sustaining his lifestyle "work towards bettering society for everyone"?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 04:56 PM
–

It sounds like his passion project is experiencing the outdoors. But I’d enjoy our wealthy moments together. Maybe I can convince him to invest in my REIT before we call it quits Does said REIT claim to hold the Brooklyn Bridge perchance?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 04:54 PM
6

The vast majority of women will be less attracted to a man who doesn't offer to pay and insist on paying.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 03:37 PM
–

How is men tending to make more money and not take care of chores / kids antimale? It effectively means you're largely shut off from having a fair shot a physical custody in the event of a divorce. Men actually get more custody if they file, the average is off because they don't. Primary physical custody?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 01:28 AM
4

No. I worked so long and so hard to get on the starting line only to find that the line had moved and there were fewer and fewer good women left at an appropriate age for me. Courting is more difficult than ever.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 01:21 AM
2

That surfer guy is at minimum supporting dozzens of local business, buying & maintaining boards, eating food, taxis, renting hotels. Tourism. Nightclubs in the evenings. That's consumption, not production.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 02:54 PM
1

Work hard in a career and then burn out?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 07:03 AM
1

And there isn't a bias to report greater than actual happiness outside of religious communities? How would we measure happiness and relationship sanctification except for self reporting? Can you think of any theoretical experiment that would test your hypothesis' explanatory power here?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/25 03:30 AM
1

So have you deliberately preserved your own chastity in order to make this virgin feel special? Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 03:59 PM
1

The problem is that to have some notion of politeness and manners it has to be somewhat universal for it to be meaningful.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 12:35 AM
2

Ratchet?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 04:18 PM
2

But is life in a committed relationship really all that much like the early stages of dating? I think it's a terrible screening process because in terms of day-to-day life the two are nothing alike.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 04:16 PM
1

Yes, dating is the means to the end of finding a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 04:01 PM
2

I'd argue that the life of being married to someone and having a home and life together is very different than the early stages of dating them. Just because someone doesn't like "dating" doesn't mean that they wouldn't enjoy their company in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 03:58 PM
1

Saying "Hello" when deep down some part of the reason you're talking to her is because you desire her romantically?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 06:34 AM
1

We're not taught that disinterest means that we're contributing to sexual harassment if asking our boss for a raise. And to be honest, that comes with risks beyond 'she or he will do it' too, so I don't do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 01:00 AM
1

The problem is that men end up internalizing these moral commandments and feeling like they're hurting women by approaching them in real life, be they feminists or not. That's hard to unlearn.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 04:10 PM
2

Because feminists have forestall other possibilities with their "You're a potential rapist" and "I'd rather meet a bear" justifications for why men shouldn't approach women in public if they have sexual or romantic desires?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 03:52 PM
2

Once I returned to the Bible Belt it was in fact a lot easier. I'm actually a little surprised by this on the religious front. This isn't a region known for being particularly Catholic.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 02:44 PM
7

Sounds fishy to me...
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 08:40 PM
0

All of those queues are also the same that would be appear if they didn't hear/see/notice you. How does one tell the difference between that and "I don't wanna talk to you"? Or "Eye contact makes me nervous" for that matter?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 12:44 AM
-4

It’s not complicated. From your description: The one that she sees staring and keeps looking away from, turns her body inward to avoid facing his general directing, suddenly gets much closer the friends she is with, makes eye contact and immediately looks away RIGHT at someone else, or any number of cues that say “please don’t approach!” That's not complicated? That's extremely complicated. And seemingly completely arbitrary. And not at all intuitive. And you're supposed to just know that going …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 04:30 PM
3

Didn't say die alone. I said get thee to a nunnery. And the difference is? Don't blame the rest of the world for the way you're backed up. Okay then, why do you think I can't find a virgin to marry?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 10:26 PM
3

Asking is not without risk. Lots of people take great offense at the question. Far greater offense than even other "are we a good match" questions like 'Do you want children?'.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 07:36 PM
5

If virginity is as important to you as you say, sounds like you should be meeting women at church. I'm not religious. And churches kinda want you to be a true believer. I think their values are correct, I think many of their stories are allegorically useful in understanding moral philosophy, but I don't think that they're the literal capital-T Truth as they insist. And yes, it would be highly unethical to tell a lie just for my own sexual fulfillment. Personally, I think getting rid of your virg…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 07:20 PM
3

It just feels like I'm investing much much more to get that much less than her past partners got. I spent my 20s working hard to try to become a good provider so that I coudl be a good husband someday. I did difficult classes in college, I stuck out a degree that was challenging, I worked long hours. All of that was an investment in becoming the kind of person who can support a wife and family. Do you think a woman who spent her 20s sleeping around expected her partners at the time to have done …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 05:27 PM
3

I'm down. I've spent my life waiting. But that's still going to be difficult to find at my age.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 06:44 PM
7

Imagine willingly being submissive to someone you deep down felt was inferior to you. Imagine pretending someone you knew was below you was above you just so you could satisfy some social quota, or to satiate your loneliness. Is THAT worth it? Is this purely about social status? If so, why should I care? If it's someone who has genuine affection and genuine concern for my own best interests and it's someone I'm even a bit attracted to, why should I care about who's above whom?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 07:57 AM
3

but not basing your identity around a romantic relationship and focusing on other things is a healthy thing to do. Is it though? Would it be healthier for me to give up on my career? When I check my finances, I could afford to do just that if it's just me. But I want to be a good husband and father someday. So I suck it up and keep working so that having a decent paying career is an option for me. A bit part of my life has been built around being a good husband someday. It's a bold claim to to t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 07:51 AM
4

And I get it, having to work to provide is a pain in the ass, but then if a woman proposes to do it for you... why refuse ? Because if she does, there's a risk that she'll 'fall out of love' or 'lose attraction' and leave us. See how divorce rates are higher when women out-earn men. Even if she doesn't... I don't want this to be a determining factor in whom I marry. Maybe I'll get lucky and find a relatively high-earner who broadly agrees with my values and then it's just more money to buy more …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 03:21 AM
1

Who puts a camera there? Car guys. You haven't seen clapped-out ricers with underglow and a "@1992NorcalCivicOver9000" Instagram handle on it around with a 360 degree action camera suction cupped to the trunk lid?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/25 04:31 PM
1

/r/pussypass exists for a reason. I looked and it's banned for being unmoderated. So... Does it exist?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/25 04:26 PM
2

Feels like people nowadays want things instantaneously. They want to get a date from the first interaction. Things take time. All those lectures about how 'oh, you're not really her friend, you just want to get into her pants' might have something to do with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/25 05:31 PM
2

And man's desire for women isn't?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/25 05:52 PM
11

Just because the 'report' isn't to some formal authority doesn't mean that it's not meaningful and without consequences. And... The consequences are not the only thing that matters. The message sent has been "You're hurting us by express romantic interest". Even if there's no consequence for causing harm, a lot of folks will still try to avoid doing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/25 01:06 AM
1

But mere decriminalization was never the only goal of the gay rights movement and you know it. They're also advocating against social pressure and social shaming of their desires. And I think that part is comparable. What do you think the overly broad definitions of 'sexual harassment' that apply on campus, in civic organizations and in the workplace mean if read literally? When feminists do it to men (and lesbian women, since the blast radius often does extend broadly enough to cover anyone who…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/25 12:17 AM
2

if people were actively trying to oppress straight men from the right to have sex, there’d be a valid comparison there I'd argue that the feminists 'never talk to women ever if you romantically desire them' a-la 'Schrodinger's Rapist' and whatnot does just that.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 09:06 PM
5

Nobody is passing away from lack of sex. Why does anyone care about gay rights then? If sex just isn't that important, what's the big imposition on remaining closeted for life?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 07:50 PM
14

Do friends... actually do that? That's just so foreign to my experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 08:44 AM
14

Men don't cry about a lack of relationships. We... Don't?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/25 03:13 PM
–

Noone would give career or investment advice of "just don't think about it, let it happen". Yes, unexpected things happen. Yes you can't plan for everything and have to adapt to changing circumstances. But you can't go into everything with no planning and preparation and expect it all to just work out for you. It seems similarly absurd to take this attitude towards dating and courtship. Love and attraction are in a large degree a matter of choice. While your emotions play a bit bigger role here …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/25 09:47 PM
1

We already live in that world to some degree. Has our increased societal wealth meant that financial status isn't as tied to attraction?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/25 07:50 PM
1

Yes, and? Can one not be opposed determination on principle and not even want to wade into the question of whom is and is not 'privileged'?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/25 06:57 AM
1

I want to believe!
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 04:56 PM
3

Wait, this question isn't about illegal immigration?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 04:48 PM
2

Actually, I'm not sure he wants to argue. He just wants to play Ad Hominem games.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 08:06 AM
1

There is also the difference between telling a story about how something has pissed you off and bellowing that story (because it had pissed you off). So, you're allowed to express emotions so long as you're not emotional about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 04:09 PM
1

I'd say emotional regulation, not emotional control. I'd argue that this is a distinction without a difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 03:51 PM
5

why stick around someone like that? Because it's not like we have that many options here. The number of women willing to stick around in that event is small and odds are you're not going to match with one.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 03:50 PM
1

There are tradeoffs in life. I could retire right now and live off of investment returns. But that would come with downsides. I want to get married and have a family and women aren't generally going to marry someone who's unemployed or underemployed.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/25 06:01 AM
1

"When others are afraid, be greedy" is reasonable advice for any given investor. But that's not the same thing as what's good for the broader economy. We'd all be better off with more growth and stable rules.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/25 04:33 AM
2

Escorting is still largely illegal in Nevada. Any actual sex has to happen at the licensed brothel to my knowledge.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 09:55 PM
2

The general unpredictability around Trump is bad for business and economic growth. His mouth causing all those waves is making the country collectively poorer. Why invest in something if the rules can change drastically tomorrow?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 09:40 PM
2

Why would court force you to put your children in daycare if you could care for them instead? Because they gave the other parent primary physical custody. And she's still gotta work, you know. It's calculated based on income not on how much money you have banked and it can be changed if income changes long term. From California Family Code Section 4058, Subsection b, Paragraph 2: When determining the earning capacity of the parent pursuant to this subdivision, the court shall consider the specif…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 05:35 PM
–

Until you have to live your life knowing nobody will take you as seriously as they take somebody of the opposite gender, I don’t want to hear about sexism. I'd much rather be loved than 'taken seriously'. It’s also incredibly tone deaf considering recent foreign events. What's this?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 05:21 PM
–

The likelihood of shared physical custody after divorce more than doubled in the United States from before 1985 until 2010–2014, from 13% to 34%. https://www.demographic-research.org/volumes/vol46/38/46-38.pdf That's still a pretty small number if you think shared physical custody should be the default. The vast majority of divorcing parents—most studies say about 90%—reach a custody agreement rather than go to trial. Suppose you're negotiating with someone, but they get to hold a gun to your he…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 05:19 PM
20

Friends are not family. Friendship is a good thing, but it no replacement for marriage and family.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 05:07 PM
2

It's not just a logistical problem... There exists no mandate that could possibly make someone give love and affection. There are policies that make that more likely, cultural trends that encourage it, but no way in a remotely free society to tell any two people that they must love one another. And even outside of a free society, you might just get the outward appearances if you try. I think there is something to be said about ending ongoing payments once a relationship has run its course. I don…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 04:50 AM
2

Why are people acting like this is the first conservative administration the U.S. has ever had? Bold of you to call the current administrative 'conservative' in either sense of the word.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 04:28 AM
2

The problem is that primary physical custody decision is based on how the roles in the household functioned prior to divorce. Suppose that I have a cool couple of million in premarital assets that are not subject to any divorce agreement. I could retire anytime I like, but because of the demands of supporting a wife, I keep working so that she can stay home with the kids. Suppose she gets bored and wants to divorce me. The court will look at the situation and say "Well, she was the primary paren…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 04:22 AM
1

True Confidence has never been tried! Joking aside, this would imply that confidence isn't a state of mind but a set of material conditions largely beyond one's control. The difference between 'confidence' and 'aggression/assertiveness' is the strength of one's hand, not one's outward behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/25 03:47 PM
21

"Don't hit on strangers! All you can tell about a stranger is that they're pretty and they know it. By hitting on strangers, you're just being shallow." "Don't try to date your friends. If you try to date your friends, you're showing that you never cared about their friendship and only wanted to get into their pants." Do you not see the catch 22 here?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/25 03:15 PM
5

Weren't the folks behind 'Girls do Porn' doing some really abusive and shady stuff? I'm not quite so dead set against the industry writ large, but there are definitely bad actors within it, even in the mainstream.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 08:18 AM
-3

I'll straight up say it: Confidence is, by definition, asshole behavior. The used car salesman who's talking a big game to make a sale is highly confident. The politician telling you what you want to hear is confident. The CEO speaking in meaningless corporate buzzwords is confident. But are any of them good people? Are they honest? Do they respect the people they're talking to? No. I fully believe meekness is virtue.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 08:05 AM
3

I'm down for waiting for marriage, but that still requires communicating some level of romantic desire to your partner. It's that step that triggers the 'you're just pretending to be her friend to get into her pants' argument, not necessarily directly asking for a sexual favor.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 01:44 AM
14

No one is keeping you there—just end the relationship and move on with your life. And if we do that, we're told that we we're 'just pretending to be her friend in order to get into her pants' or some other such moralizing. This whole thing feels like 'begging the question' to me. How does one get someone to have romantic feeling for us? And why is it at familiarity is such a bar to romantic attraction? We're told over and over again that judging by lust for their bodies is shallow and wrong. Fai…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 12:56 AM
5

yet I don't see men trying to keep their n count low in order to achieve a successful marriage. Um... I mean I exist? Right?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 06:44 AM
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And expressions of romantic interest directed at women are what women are shaming and condemning.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 12:10 AM
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Asking for a relationship usually starts with some expression of romantic interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 04:58 PM
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Sure they are. Remember Schrodinger's Rapist? The whole 'Nice Guy' discourse? All the 'women are just at whatever activity they're at to have a good time and don't want to be bothered' so-called 'advice'?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 04:40 PM
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The complaint isn't about women saying 'no', it's about women suggest that it's shameful to even ask for a romantic relationship in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 04:23 PM
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Gays not being able to seek sexual partners for fear of homophobic reactions from society isn't oppression either by that definition. It's literally just people leaving them alone and wanting them to leave you alone too. That's it, that's the "issue".
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 03:12 PM
2

If I resist and they shoot me in the head? Well, yeah. I'd be dead either way. You're greatly underestimating the level violence involved or threatened in a mugging. Both of these are life-threatening situations where if the victim is armed they're well within their rights to kill their attacker. Is the impact of being raped worse on average? Yes. But they're both violent acts against my person. Mugging isn't a property crime.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 03:14 PM
2

Both are criminal acts committed through violence or threat of violence?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 03:51 AM
3

Because we're told that 'we're too young' to to do that. That if we 'just wait' everything will work out just fine. That I we have to focus on our studies to get into a good college to get an in demand degree to get a good job that will allow us to provide for a wife and family. So we wait and sacrifice. We get into that 'good' college, we get that good job, and by the time we get there there's nobody left for us.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 04:55 PM
1

It’s not about current salary for me, it’s about ambition To me, this is saying that I'll never be good enough. I avoid women who demand ambition for that reason. 'Ambition' realistically would only lead me to giving up the parts of my career that I like for more parts I don't like and am not good at.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 02:23 AM
5

As someone who has no firsthand experience, thinks that extreme porn is probably using various degrees of trick photography and therefore not much of a real opinion here... I have to wonder just how much variability there is there?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/25 07:09 AM
5

I guess a lot of guys saw the ‘chopping wood’ part and missed the ‘friendly, open, helpful, attractive guy doing something he’s obviously really good at’ part. But let's be honest, running one of them hydraulic log splitters doesn't have the same effect now does it?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/25 07:04 AM
3

Not pissing away thirty bucks on some asshole’s ebook. Sure. Like I said, there's lots of valid criticism of this particular strategy. But there's lots of other strategies out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 02:31 AM
9

But that still boils down to "How dare you strategize!" or "How dare you systematize!" as if the only valid relationships come from doing what feels natural in the moment.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 08:03 PM
2

You: maybe you should reconsider dating until you’ve got those issues resolved. Also you: Otherwise, yeah, the only way to get better at dating is to date more. And that may involve a lot failure, and a lot of trial and error.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 07:48 PM
2

"Sorry, economics is complicated and we're not here to make you rich." is not a winning answer. But that does just so happen to be the correct answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 07:47 PM
14

There are lots of good anti-redpill arguments. "How dare you think rationally about how to find a wife!" isn't one of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 07:45 PM
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It can be. Imagine this: You're a hard working husband who sacrifices much to provide for your family. Your wife is a stay at home mother who eventually just 'falls out of love' and wants a divorce. Now she gets to say that she 'gave up' her future earnings potential and thus deserves ongoing spousal support, that she contributed to the household and thus deserves half of all of the man's assets, and that since she was primary caregiver she deserves primary physical custody. The result is that t…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 09:49 AM
1

You think women's demands that we keep our feelings to ourselves least they get the ick is not "emotional labor"?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 05:05 PM
1

This feels a bit like begging the question. "If she adores you" is assuming this isn't a factor in rather or not she adores you.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 12:05 PM
8

Because if you believe you can succeed you will spend more time on working towards that direction rather than giving up But more time working towards that goal is a part of the material conditions of the world. The point is that contents of your head in and of themselves are not cause of success. One cannot simply 'manifest' things, that's woo bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 08:41 PM
6

Men only respond with disgust to that idea because they are indoctrinated with homophobia from a very young age. Is it indoctrination? Or is that disgust an inborn part of being heterosexual?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 08:07 PM
6

Do you not know what social graces are? Masking those parts of us that are undesirable and abrasive. Why is that the end all, be all of their existence? What else will I do that outlives me?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 05:05 PM
6

Having social graces and manufacturing a personality are not the same thing. And what exactly is the difference? a) not make finding a woman the end all, be all of your existence In the very real sense of "I don't get to have a family unless I do this", that's kinda hard to avoid.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 04:49 PM
12

Nope. That's how you wear a mask and hope nobody ever notices, which eventually they will. There's a reason that saying someone has 'no filter' is generally a bad thing. We're all masking. That's the cost of living with other human beings, you have to be concerned with how your behavior and how your words will affect them. That's red pill bullshit. And the alternative is... "Just act naturally and it'll just happen when you least expect it!"? Do we give that advice to people when it comes to the…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 01:27 PM
15

That's how you become attractive to the opposite sex, no? It's not like we have much of a choice in the matter once we say that we want to have marriage and family. We have to grow into the role of husband and father.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 12:53 PM
13

Why are men basing their gender identity on what they think women want? Because they want to be loved and maybe have a wife and family someday?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 10:08 AM
1

If you're retired, you're not holding down a job by definition and you're not gainfully employed and not 'responsibly hold[ing] a job'. if they can retire why would I not allow that. I'm asking you that question.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/24 11:17 PM
1

Is the best decision for them always 'moar'? Because the way you put it your man is never permitted to retire. Or take a break even.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/24 09:00 PM
2

Just that they have a career? And can hold their job? That matters more. In a world where "stack ranking" is common and folks regularly are laid off as needs change, is "can hold their job" realistic? We don't live in a world where you work for one company for 40 years and then retire anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/24 11:11 AM
0

Causation does not equal correlation Sure, but when I'm choosing a partner, does it matter which direction the causality arrow points?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/24 07:37 PM
0

A lot of the "The house must be spotless or someone will judge me" stuff isn't mandatory.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/24 07:33 PM
14

Are men specifically attracted to violent women?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 11:01 PM
2

They are not very traditional at all at the end of the day - they are women who run their media businesses Back when homesteads were more common, there were lots of trades that women practiced within their homes to produce goods to trade or sell. It allowed her to care for young children while still doing economically important work for the household. So... In some ways that's perfectly traditional.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 08:37 AM
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Really? Because that has never been my experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 06:21 PM
1

The biggest problem with the terp PUA shit is that it presumes to tell men that women are a problem to be solved; rather than people with their own desires, motives and lives. They will say rejection occurs because you failed to implement “the system”, rather than because of things completely out of your hands. Does this imply that our behavior has no impact on how attractive we are to a potential partner? Is it not true that the outcome can change by learning how to act different or by changing…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 11:43 AM
1

FWIW, I think the biggest problem is that young dudes put waaaay too much stake in approaching women - they're thinking many steps ahead rather than just having a nice little chat for a minute and seeing if there's any kind of vibe. For what it's worth, I don't really believe in 'vibes' and thus find this to be worse than useless. It's the "don't worry, it will just happen when you least expect it" all over again.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 11:41 AM
0

Imagine someone answering "If you want a job, that's your problem" right after making nearly all work illegal with a $10,000 USD an hour minimum wage law. In terms of broader cultural trends, this is everyone's problem to some degree or other.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 11:38 AM
4

Neither do women. Many jurisdictions do allow a mother to surrender her child without any further obligations.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 07:21 AM
11

They haven’t had dating experience Neither have I. Focusing on becoming good husband material does that to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 11:44 AM
8

How the hell is a woman supposed to pick you first when she starts off her dating and relationships journey, when she hasn’t even met you yet? I waited for her without even meeting her. This doesn't seem such an absurd demand to me: Don't sleep with people you're not intending to marry.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 11:39 AM
4

they date guys they like and hope it works out long term That seems to say that is what girls do. They don't date guys they think it will work out with long and hope they like them, the arrow goes the other way.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 08:37 AM
3

Yes. And also yes. I am somewhat proud of celibacy in some sense. I've resisted a great cultural pull towards casual sex and I think that makes me a better husband. But I really do wish that I had found a wife 10 years ago. I wanted to be married when I was 18, and almost everything in my life has been built towards this end to some degree or other and it still hasn't happened. And I blame not just women, but our broader culture for promoting bad ideas that have made this so much harder.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/24 07:43 PM
9

Building a relationship is very different than flirting with strangers.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 08:46 PM
2

In liberal/left leaning spaces, the word incel/virgin is used as an insult usually when a man has shown to be a mysoginist. Two wrongs don't make a right, but I understand that it's simpler to aim where it hurts. And their definition of 'mysoginist' is everyone who disagrees with them. Or is 'weird' in some way. From "Untitled" Let’s not mince words. There is a growing trend in Internet feminism that works exactly by conflating the ideas of nerd, misogynist, virgin, person who disagrees with fem…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/24 08:34 PM
-1

They don't. They do have a duty to provide for their child. What reason does a rich person have to allow their child to live in squalor half the time? But the child support payment doesn't go to the child or the child's trust fund. It goes to the other parent. Indeed, you say the whole point of this is so that the other parent can pass off the child support payments they receive as their own wealth so that both parents can appear closer in terms of economic standing, no? That's that's the attitu…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/24 04:49 AM
-4

Same problem as #1. The much wealthier parent shouldn't be allowed to leverage their wealth for a child's favor. You know what... I fundamentally disagree with this. Yes, a parent has a duty to be a provider for their children. But in the event of a divorce, they don't have a duty to provide for the other partner. The partner is discharging their duties from the marriage, why should they expect to have their efforts at providing for the children subsidized the way they were in the marriage? The …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/24 01:50 AM
3

They are. Why do men earn more than women on a statistical average basis? Why am I even bothering to look for a job right now? Why are men making it a point to keep their feeling to themselves? My entire life has been dedicated to making myself more appealing for a mate. "Get good grades so you can get into a good school so you can get a good job so that you can be a good provider for your future wife and family" was drilled into me for as long as I can remember.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 01:33 AM
1

Are men also willing to put in the lifelong effort to make themselves more appealing for a mate, knowing that slip ups could result in a loss of love and a loss of loyalty? That's the default ask, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 01:24 AM
1

She didn't give them more. She gave at least one of them her virginity. That kinda stings because I was waiting for her. She wants to be with you committed and watch you die and have cats or babies together. She wanted to be with and committed her past partners more. Which is why she asked less of them. Just to get on the starting line at my age I have to have put in a lot of effort and sacrifice into having a successful career that they didn't demand of their earlier partners. They didn't get t…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 11:21 PM
6

Most people who dont enjoy dating don’t enjoy it cause they want the “end result” without the process Or perhaps the cause and effect are reversed: People want the 'end result without the process' because they don't enjoy dating? That seems to make more sense to me. The ones that actually enjoy the process? That like to meet new people, go out and try new places find different ways to have fun, see if they vibe and if becomes more: or doesn’t but that means meeting some more new people? Those pe…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/24 11:18 AM
1

Sure is a way to show appreciation: Giving one of those 'mistreated' her more in exchange for less investment than I have to make to have a relationship with her. It's in you feeling like they got something you didn't. They did get something I didn't. Because I sacrificed that so that I could be a better husband one day. And she gave something to those past partners she cannot give to me because she gave it to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 11:12 PM
1

No, I was purposefully saving myself for my future wife in order to be a better husband. Why was I not worth her saving herself to be a better wife for me?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 06:15 PM
-1

Can someone who spent their 20s sleeping around for 'fun' really love and appreciate me and the fact I spent that part of my life dutifully waiting and preparing to be a good husband for them? Deep down, I don't think that they can.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 08:44 AM
6

Career suicide (except Bill Clinton, maybe). Clinton never won another election... Though a former president running for something for NYC dogcatcher or something would be odd regardless.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 07:02 AM
2

George Zimmerman was in direct and immediate danger because Trayvon Martin was in the act of curb stomping him when he pulled the trigger.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 01:38 AM
3

Killing someone who isn't an immediate threat isn't self defense.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 01:27 AM
5

A lot of folks seem to treat them as moral judgements. As in "How dare you make women feel uncomfortable by being 'creepy'".
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/24 07:23 AM
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That's pretty big step from "Noone is saying this" to "Well, it didn't effect everyone". No, it didn't. But that doesn't lessen the real harms to those whom it did effect and the need to more prominently make opposing arguments.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 06:04 AM
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No one one is saying that attraction and wanting to take a woman on a date is a "disgusting form of objectification". Remember that feminist 'Schrödinger's rapist' essay? Or all the "Nice Guy" discourse from the feminists? Remember Captain Awkward tearing into a guy for daring to say he was afraid to talk to a woman at an art exhibit? Or the responses to this comment saying the professor should lose his job over it? Or the other feminist discourse about that which is documented here? Yes, that m…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 05:56 AM
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Yes. Purity culture is a bitch. Is it purity culture that's responsible for this? Or is it the feminists saying that a man is always a 'potential rapist'?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 05:49 AM
1

Modules? I wonder how the battery pack is configured. And just how much of a PITA would it be do DIY a whole pack rebuild with new NiMH battery cells.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/24 03:05 AM
1

I kinda doubt that they'll end up walking it back... On the brighter side, AWS is going to need some backfills. On the not so bright side, hellofa time to join AWS.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 07:15 AM
1

If we're not making an effort towards finding a relationship, then are you not 'just waiting'? I'm not seeing a meaningful difference here between "Enjoy your life and do nothing to find a relationship and one will just fine you" and "Just wait and it will all work out just fine" here. I'm not seeing how I've misrepresented your advice and your views here.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 03:33 AM
1

My dad passed away before I could find a wife and have children. The point is that there is a cost imposed in waiting, even if it does eventually work out.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 03:22 AM
1

Yes, for a career, I'd tell someone to get more experience. Kinda hard to do that when your other advice is (figuratively) "don't apply for jobs or send out resumes or even work on marketable skills, recruiters will find you when you're enjoying the rest of your life". I never said to wait. I said to enjoy. Big difference. Is there? Some part of this seems to come across as telling us to stop caring rather or not we ever have a relationship. I'm just not sure that's possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 02:52 AM
1

Honestly, men here have been far more angry about my advice than I've ever been about anything in my life. You know why? People like you giving advice like that is why my children (that is, should I ever be so blessed) will never know their grandfather. It's the reason I'm alone at 36 and am thinking of just giving up. Because the task of finding a wife would have been much easier had I put more effort specifically into it earlier when I was younger and a better match for the kind of woman I wou…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/24 02:49 AM
8

Because they don't have to.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/24 07:36 AM
1

How are they different here? What about having a career warrants making an effort, what about wanting to have a wife and family necessitates the whole "Just wait and it'll just happen" attitude?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/24 02:27 AM
4

Would you give this advice about one's career?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/24 07:02 AM
–

It does increase women’s chances but at the same time it’s because there’s a bias towards men. Is it? I've seen quite the opposite in terms of hiring in tech. It's entirely plausible to have disparate outcomes that run contrary to the bias in hiring, rather than being be caused by it. Talent and interest in a sector are not evenly distributed in the population, and thus we can't ever expect that sector to have its gender ratio match the overall population.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 09:28 PM
–

From what I know/have learned men often have more opportunities, male dominated fields are higher paying and have a huge barrier to entry for women, often being hostile environments for them. Diversity hiring and the like gives women a huge advantage in a lot of 'male-dominated' fields, if they have the interest to enter them in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 09:20 PM
–

Most men outearn most women because women prefer men who outearn them. Men see this and plan their lives accordingly.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 09:19 PM
–

Right now sectors such as technology are largely male dominated meaning those men have the same opportunity as the women in their major to make the same amount of money. That isn't necessarily so. The desire for 'diversity' in hiring does give women something of a leg up in the hiring process.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 08:54 PM
0

Deadbeat dads can get fucked. To the extent that they're not driven out of the family by the woman's preference for a child support and welfare check over a present father, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 06:59 PM
–

Is money really only a goal to men if it helps them get a woman? Is that the only motivator to work hard? For me, yes. No experience that I could buy is remotely comparable to having a wife and family. That requires me to work hard and sacrifice, to the point that I was told to not date until I had a million dollars saved and invested. If it's just me, why shouldn't I just do the whole FIRE track and use a lost cost of living to stretch the million dollars out over a whole lifetime?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 06:09 PM
–

People who would have earned more because of innate traits are more likely to attend college.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 06:05 PM
–

Part of the reason why is the need to provide.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 06:04 PM
–

Cleaning his own house is extra effort? Damn. That guy can stay single. A lot of women expect much higher standards and make decisions based not on what works best but on the thought that someone, somewhere is somehow judging the appearance of their home. I'll gladly live in the middle of a construction site for weeks while I fix various interior issues, but few women would tolerate something like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/24 09:12 AM
2

Most people are not living their life thinking about how they can improve the statistical odds for people of their own gender, or how their actions would imbalance society or a social system in their favor. Nobody thinks like that except a tiny minority of cringe weirdos. I get the feeling you're stealing a base here. Feminists exist and they're not that 'weird' in that they're a part of the political mainstream. I'm not sure if that's what you're intending to talk about, but there are lots of p…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/24 09:41 AM
12

No, the economic analogy to markets is not objectifying. Even in the world of trading physical goods, we're trading with people. Every relationship is fundamentally transactional in that people are only going to engage in it if they're getting something of value out of it. Now these transactions look different for people we know closely because we know and care about their welbeing in a way we can't for strangers, but there's still an exchange of value going on there. Everyone is a participant, …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 09:27 AM
7

If you are a man who thinks of marriage as a nuisance (responsibilities that are not wanted), why even put yourself in this position? Why date women? Why marry them? If it really is so horrible, why not chase the Chad dream forever and try to become as hot as possible while single? I'm not sure I can give a generalized answer to this, but I can say why I think the sacrifices in and before marriage are necessary: The alternative is unethical. "Chad's" behavior is unethical. It's using women for s…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/24 09:44 AM
1

Ah yes, completely dodging the point made and instead trying to counter it with meaningless fluff that somehow manages to prove my point. "The 'market' will continue", as I otherwise stated as "Alcatel, like 'SMV'-toting dinguses could disappear unnoticed." And what exactly was your point? That people who talk about dating in terms of markets is what causes the market-like behavior we see in dating? Because that's the point addressed with that point. And... I'm not really seeing the "TRP" folks …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 07:29 AM
2

TRP treats themselves as the rule - instead of seeing themselves for the Alcatel they really are, they try to pretend that they are all of android and everyone else is "in denial" by using the same cult-y rhetoric we've seen time and time again. The whole notion of markets and their dynamics would still exist even if there was nobody talking about the concept. This is descriptive, not prospective. Because a market implies a product, which is inherently objectifying, and in no market does a produ…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:21 AM
1

Compare it to the phone market, then. The people who are sexually introverted are iPhones The people who are more sexually expressive are Samsung The various parties of pillmaxxed prats are Xiaomi or Alcatel I'm not sure I follow the point of this analogy. Care to explain? Sure, you're part of the "market", but almost nobody would notice if you were to vanish from it. Overall, the same could be said for any individual to some extent. Within a small population it's probably not true, but we have …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:56 AM
1

I know exactly what you people think it is, I'm simply not so divorced from reality that I'd deign to call it anything other than "personal opinion". What is any market but the sum total of a multitude of people's "personal opinion"?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 05:28 AM
1

And maybe that is his experience? Is there any way for him to talk about that without you calling it disrespectful?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/24 05:28 PM
0

If kindness and virtue are predicated on men just not speaking up about their troubles in this area, then they're not worth all that much. I don't think the OP's post was disrespectful towards women. You might take issue with it or disagree, but it's not trying to cuss you out or call you names. It's trying to advance an argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/24 05:11 PM
6

So we already are more virtuous and kind and understanding. Selection bias is a hellofa drug. I can point to a sea of women calling just about any man who talks about how painful and lonely their dating experience is or was 'entitled' or 'incel' or 'virgin neckbeard loser' and so on.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/24 07:47 AM
–

And I'm saying that having a commemorative month isn't all that useful to the underlying issue, pride or no.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/24 05:44 AM
2

Yes, I already said that dudes here will come up with all sorts of excuses as to why mental health services won't help men's mental health, because they only care about bashing women. You have demonstrated my exact point flawlessly. How does "Talk therapy doesn't work" get turned into "you must hate women?". That seems like a non-sequitur.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 08:18 PM
2

Mothers get children after divorce because men don't fight for custody. Men don't fight for primary physical custody because they know they'll lose. Yes, due to the fact that women physicaly give birth it's logical that women mostly stay at home with children and take parental leave. So due to this fact it can never be 50:50, I admit that. If men truly wanted children it would be maybe 25:75 or something, but reality is not even close. Just because men and women often have different roles in the…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 08:13 PM
1

but also the lgbtq community's fault... men's mental health month is in June and is overshadowed by pride. Eh? I'm not sure that what month pride is in is all that important in the broader context of men's mental health.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 08:08 PM
3

If the sub is overrun with men crying about how women won’t sleep with them or women’s hypergamy - well you end up with PPD and MRA. And those aren’t a good look. Marriage and family are some of the most defining parts of a person's life. If there is broad cultural movement that's making this harder if not impossible for a good chunk of men, that's important. It can't be simply dismissed with a “no one will touch my pp”. Imagine taking this response to Gay Marriage. Imagine someone saying "There…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 07:56 PM
5

All issues of pay are the choice of capitalists who set the wages not the workers that labor for them. Not entirely. Wages are set through mutual agreement between employer and employee. Employees can and do leave jobs that pay less than they could earn elsewhere. Employers can and do lay of employees if they think they can replace them for cheaper. Labor is a market like any other.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 02:23 AM
0

Statistically, women have way more to lose from marriage. This doesn't follow. You're comparing getting divorced to remaining married, not to having never married and making similar choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/24 03:28 PM
-1

Unironically, yes. I'd much rather have been in a culture that has arranged marriages.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/24 01:27 AM
0

Because the Sexual and Relationship marketplace is, with very few exceptions, a pure barter system. People are pretty non-fungible, with a near infinite amount of variation between them, what it is they want and what it is they have to offer. There's not exactly a way to turn this into a single number. That doesn't mean that the marketplace analogy is useless, only that you have to consider it in more depth than "give money, receive goods and services".
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 10:46 PM
1

I'm not sure that's knowable. It's like asking "what about food do you want" when someone is hungry. That's how innate this is.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 10:14 PM
2

Have you thought why you want those things? Yes. I think that man's desire for companionship is something that's innate. That's not the same thing as liking the process of how you get there.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 09:31 PM
3

If you don’t really know what’s fun about dating why would you even want to date?! Because I want a relationship and a family of my own and this is a phase you have to go through in order to get there?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 09:23 PM
4

Most people treat dating as “oh man I’m gonna have a fun time!” ... What could possibly be enjoyable about dating? The result of having a meaningful human connection might be well worth it, but do I really have to pretend that the awkward early stages where I'm struggling to prove myself worthy are fun?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 09:19 PM
22

I think this answer really downplays the amount of effort some folks have to do in order find someone. This stuff doesn't just come naturally to some, maybe even most people.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 09:12 PM
1

I'm saying it's a lot less likely. A woman isn't going to break up with a man who is successful because of his success. She might break up with a man because of her own success.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 07:56 PM
1

In what way do women not have the same expectations? Women generally don't break up with their husbands as readily when their husband finds success they do when they find success.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 07:51 PM
4

https://time.com/6977434/birth-control-contraception-access-griswold-threat/ Arguing that Griswold was wrongly decided isn't the same thing as a political push to outlaw birth control. Next! https://prospect.org/health/2024-03-07-controlling-birth-control/ This is about as close as you're going to get. An Oklahoma Republican has proposed a ban on birth control that is not provided by a doctor. The original target is emergency contraception options like Plan B, but that raises questions about the…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 02:16 AM
1

Can you point to even a single piece of proposed state legislation that seeks to outlaw birth control?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 12:10 AM
2

0 I'm rather firmly in the category of "Griswald was wrongly decided" and I'm seeing close to zero political desire to outlaw birth control.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 11:38 PM
4

Is personality really something that can be 'worked on' when there's a pretty serious genetic component to it?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 10:20 PM
1

So, if they have in real terms the same - or as in the graph you linked - slightly more, that doesn't mean material wealth is as accessible to the working class. What do you mean by that? Another consideration is that now, both members of a couple have to earn a full-time wage to reach the same income. I'm citing individual median real wage, not a household one. Then there's the issue of housing being far more expensive than in the past, and people have become much more reliant on renting, which…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 09:41 PM
3

A lot of these things aren't even "oppression" so much as you see women fighting for female rights and for some reason want them to fight for YOU... when even YOU aren't willing to fight. How often have we heard "feminism just means equality" or "feminism is for everyone" or "feminism is just opposition to sexism"? They make themselves out to be the only game in town for addressing gendered issues in our culture, then they tell men when they have gendered issues "Oh, no feminism for the advancem…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 09:34 PM
2

I'm interpreting OP's comment as talking directly about hiring and admissions process that are intended to disadvantage men. Your job application or college application being ignored is still being ignored, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 09:17 PM
3

There's lots of feminists who have cited that paper as a prospective and talked about how they need to make the field less appealing to 'tinkering boys'. Or see this paper and how it's used to suggest throwing the nerds out the field because they're making it look bad to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 09:14 PM
0

Yes, but employers and public institutions are employers and institutions and feminists often demand sexist discrimination against men in things like hiring and admissions decisions in these areas.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 09:02 PM
-5

You’d be told your function is to stay at home, raise kids and take care of your wife, and discouraged from doing anything to change this You say this like it's a bad thing and not the privileged position. I completely disagree, it's a great privilege to be able to stay home and raise your children. One that isn't extended to most men because of women's preferences. Yes, there was real harm to women in the past sexism of the western world. This really isn't a good example of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 08:59 PM
3

But feminism has fought to make school less friendly to boys and young men in lots of ways. They're trying to take away the parts of school that appeal to young boys, see the efforts to make CS education less appealing to 'tinkering boys', see efforts to do away with due process and presumption for young men accused of sexual misconduct while attending university.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 08:45 PM
4

This is also why the birth rate is declining in the West because working class people (in reproductive age) have less material wealth than the past two generations. But is that true economically? Median real wages are up from previous generations. The younger generations are not doing any worse than their parents were in terms of wealth.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 08:29 PM
2

Yes, spousal abuse is bad and reasonable grounds for divorce. There, you happy? And let's be honest here: Most spousal abuse is mutual without a clear aggressor. That doesn't make either party's behavior acceptable, but it does call into to question the 'blame men' part of this argument. And that's before we get to the fact that spousal abuse isn't most cases of divorce and thus doesn't explain the gap in divorce rate here.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 07:57 PM
0

U.S. invaded and attacked Korea The DPRK with Soviet help started the war. So... No, we didn't "invade and attack" Korea.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 07:47 PM
2

Men still hold all the levers of power with the exception of academia. More men in leadership positions in government, media, corporations, tech/media, and financial institutions… so where exactly are the women exerting their vengeful feminism? And why can't men be supporters of vengeful feminism? Ffs, we just had roe v wade overturned. If women really had power that would have never happened. Except there are more women on the court when Dobbs was decided when Roe was. Is Amy Coney Barret not a…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 07:18 PM
0

Men do not get scholarships? Men don't learn in publicly funded schools? Source? How many man-specific schools and scholarships are there in modern day? And, you see the way boys are treated in public schools?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 07:12 PM
10

Even penises in films you can get away with PG 13. But showing a vagina is a big no no. Umm... Wat? I'm pretty sure it's quite the opposite here. No genitalia is permitted for stuff rated PG-13, and signing of a penis will get the film rated NC-17 by the MPAA whereas full frontal female nudity will get an "R" rating.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 07:10 PM
0

You don't get to play the "it's not my job to educate you" as a way of getting out of defining your terms or even staking out an actual position and then get to complain about 'bad faith' and 'illogical arguments' because "it's not my job to educate you" is an example of both of those.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 07:06 PM
-3

The problem is that "equality under the law" isn't enough for the feminist activists. They're seeking a broad social social equality. They see it as a problem that needs to be corrected by force if there are fewer women who want to become engineers than men. They see it as a problem to be corrected by force if women earn less doing different work than men. This is a contradiction when they also demand a man who earns more than them.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 07:03 PM
-4

If that's going to be your attitude, then "it's not my job to educate you".
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:58 PM
-1

Sacrifices such as? Having to work longer hours in more stressful, demanding, and in some cases physically exhausting and dangerous jobs because they have to prove to women that they're good providers. If they want a career in a competitive field, they are the ones who need to sacrifice having kids or push it back until their late 30s. This is not something men need to do. And why do you want a career in a competitive field that badly if that's the cost? The whole reason I want a career is to th…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:57 PM
4

It feels weird to describe "sacrificing" one's career for the sake of having and raising kids when the whole reason I ever bothered with a career in the first place. For me the career is the sacrifice, and having a wife and family is the reward for that. This isn't to say that having and raising kids is not without its challenges or that it's easy or not real work. None of that's true. It just seems to me to be that much more fulfilling and important that pursuing a career once you have some lev…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:55 PM
7

And who's filing for divorce with reasons like "we fell out of love" in those cases? Do you have any reason to conclude that "it's the man's poor hurt fee fees" that's causing higher rates of divorce when the woman out-earns the man and not the woman's contempt for a man she out-earns?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:30 PM
-3

It is not women's responsibility to do your research for you, nor it is our job to argue against such an overtly inaccurate statement. So then you concede the point then? I will always read "it's no my job to argue against your claim" as "I have no argument". If you don't wanna argue, don't make the claim.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:28 PM
8

Men have higher income because they make sacrifices in other areas of life to achieve that. They make different choices in life than women, and I'd argue that they do so at the behest of women. In other words, men earn more because that's what women demand of them to be in a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:25 PM
1

Is it? I think it logically follows from the physical and emotional impacts of intimacy and sex. This has the capacity to create a human life, and has an enormous emotional impact on both parties. Unless you're in a place to deal with that, you shouldn't be playing with fire here. What happens if she gets pregnant and you can't or will not marry her? Or provide for her and your child? I still think that part of that is reasonable. It's worth reminding yourself that you are looking for the mother…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 07:53 AM
3

I just took the rejection to mean that I wasn't strong and masculine enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 10:35 PM
9

If men were truly motivated by romance and sex, they'd have pursued it in middle and high school, certainly by college. Since they didn't, the drive just wasn't there. Um... No? All the time I was in high school and college I'm told to "don't worry, it will work itself out, just focus on your studies, focus on getting a good job and a stable career so that you can be a good husband someday". And I did just that, figuring that it was wrong to date or sleep with someone I can't provide for and mar…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 10:31 PM
-2

If they have a passion for what they do, would they do it without pay? More often than not, no they wouldn't. Also, that passion for what they do can mean that they prioritize that over the family's well-being.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 09:58 PM
3

Because I've had at least a couple tell me just that. Truth of the matter is that I'm so inexperienced I don't know how to behave in order to trigger that 'romantic spark', only that I'm doing something wrong or that there must be something fundamentally wrong with my personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 09:57 PM
3

I suppose I should rephrase that then: Sure like minded women exist, but that like-mindedness doesn't make meek men who dislike status and power games attractive to them. They still don't feel a 'romantic spark' when they meet such a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 09:37 PM
2

Why do you think career women would have different reasons than career men? To some extent, I do object to overly focused career men for much the same reasons. But there's a key difference here: You don't have the same expectation that you provide for your family that way that it's demanded of men. Most men are not going to kick you to the curb if earn less than they do the way most women will not even consider a man who earns less than they do. I have to be a high earner if I want to find a wif…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 09:34 PM
3

You'd rather become an asshole to potentially raise your chances with the kind of girls who like assholes that put your effort in finding other like minded people with whom you'd be able to build real connection? I'm not entirely convinced that these like minded women exist. Is there anyone who, everything else being equal, would choose the subordination over the boss? The grunt over the officer? The follower over the leader?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 09:16 PM
6

If I'm true to myself, I'm by definition not confident. Because self-doubt is a core part of my personality. I know that about myself. The demand for confidence is a demand that I put on act by definition.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 09:05 PM
6

The entire reason I have a career at all is to support my wife and family. If it's just me, I can retire and live on some $30k a year in investment returns someplace fun. The only reason I don't so I can provide a better life for the possible future family I may or may not someday have. My career is the sacrifice I make, not an goal in and of itself. To this end, I think someone being a 'boss babe' signals some pretty big differences in values. For me, money is a means of buying security, not st…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 08:54 PM
4

But, you gotta be confident, and that’s not something that should be faked, it should be genuinely worked on. I genuinely think this is something that's incompatible with being a good person. A good person is humble, and that's the opposite of confidence. More broadly, the kind of personality traits that many if not most women are attracted to revolve around displays of power and status. These are often zero-sum games, where the way forward is to knock others down, which in my mind is the broad …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 08:38 PM
1

If you sound like this while talking about your feelings are you really expressing your emotions?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 04:36 AM
1

So you're allowed to express your feelings, so long as you do so in an emotionless state? That's not really addressing the problem at hand here, is it?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 03:49 AM
2

Look at all the women who get 'the ick' from seeing any display of so-called 'negative' emotion or perceived weakness. That's a demand for 'emotional regulation' that's so strict that it does effectively turn into a demand for suppressing your emotions. Or in other words, to 'keep your feelings to yourself'. It's not direct harm from a lack of self control that's in question here: Noone is defending the "I got frustrated and tried hurt someone or their stuff" as an approach to emotional expressi…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 11:16 PM
8

You can want someone to share their emotions and feelings AND want to only date adults who have adult level emotional regulation abilities. And this is on some level a fundamental contradiction. The 'emotional regulation' demanded always turns into "keep your feelings to yourself".
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 08:43 PM
–

When your position commits you to saying “Love isn’t important to humans and we should demand people stop caring about whether or not they have it,” you need to take a really careful look in the mirror – assuming you even show up in one. Is from Radicalizing the Romanceless. The rest are your words?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/24 01:39 PM
3

Clearly a single mother should prioritize her children over her dating life. But that does mean that if I'm a man seeking to court and marry a woman, this would be a concern of mine because it means that she'll never be as invested in me (and possibly our children) as she is in her current children. It's a perfectly good reason to not date a single mother even if she's doing the right thing by her children.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/24 08:53 PM
8

I met my fiance through a mutual when I wasn’t looking for a long term partner. In other words, he approached you? Yeah I’m personally not a fan of cold approaches. Because I don’t go into public hoping strangers talk to me. Fair enough. But we're often also told to not date our friends because it means that our friendship wasn't real and we just wanted to get into their pants. Can you see the contradiction here?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/24 07:46 PM
8

Everytime I've been approached I wasn't hoping to be approached. Do you just have no interest in finding a partner at all then? Bottom line: I know you don't like approaching. But that's not a product of oppression that's a product of women existing in public and minding their own business. But it is a product of women telling us how approaching them makes horrible pests and how we shouldn't do it as a moral imperative.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/24 07:38 PM
4

And you think a man who struggles to find a partner is living a happy life?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/24 08:35 PM
2

Is there any kind of method or strategy towards dating that you consider compatible with 'treating women as people'? Or does treating people as people imply not thinking analytically about them at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/24 06:44 AM
1

In a lot of 'diversity' programs, I am. I don't think that's right going either way. Hurting innocent individuals for the greater good is always going to be wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/24 06:14 PM
-4

Wtf is up with y’all and issues with diversity? Do you object to the "we should hire fewer women to give mean a better shot on the dating market" takes? If you so, perhaps you'd see why white men would object to a 'we must discriminate against you because of your race and gender' take going the other way?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/24 12:54 AM
–

I don’t know a single man under the age of 60 in real life who wants a housewife. Perhaps they want one, but they know that they'll face judgement from people like you if they're open about it? Or they want a housewife, but they have so few options in dating and courtship that they're afraid of offending women by saying that?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/24 11:56 PM
1

Moreover, I don’t think it’s realistic to undertake some massive public service campaign that encourages women to be more sexually available to shorter, heavier, unemployed or socially awkward men. You cannot ask someone to be attracted to someone in the interests of fairness, right? When the shoe was on the other foot, there was a lot of feminist efforts to change culture in this area with talk about 'unreasonable beauty standards'. Or talking about 'emotional labor' and how it's wrong to expec…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/24 07:09 AM
5

I haven't heard a single person, man or woman, say that dating is super fun. I've lost track of the number of advice articles that go on and on about how dating should be fun. Sure, the result might be worthwhile, but saying "try to think of dating as fun" seems about as effective as "try to think of a root canal as fun".
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/24 06:59 AM
–

Gawd, these anti-capitalist takes are a bit nuts on some level. No, capitalism and the market can't generally fix loneliness. It's not supposed to. It can provide tools and great wealth, but fundamentally these kind of deep interpersonal are beyond the reach of the market. And I'd say that this a not a bad thing: It's how we get people who wouldn't get along in person to cooperate economically. Capitalism can give you the cell phone and the unlimited minutes, but it's not going to get you to cal…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/24 04:15 AM
–

It seems a lot of men like the utility of a woman (sex, babies, care, company, status) but they do not LIKE them as people. It seems a lot of women like the utility of a man (provision, protection, care status) but they don't LIKE them as people.... Actually, no I'll take a different take. All relationships are transactional, be they romantic or platonic. All relationships are an exchange of value and utility between people. We interact because we receive something of value from it. The value an…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/24 03:36 AM
3

Sure, but that has consequences. A lot of the traits that people find superficially attractive are anti-correlated with being a good spouse or being a good person. Prioritize those traits and you're potentially giving up something more important in the longer term. I think it's perfectly okay to point that out.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/24 01:29 AM
6

Guys are told much the same thing. That they have 'unrealistic beauty standards' and that they should prioritize things other than raw sexual attraction in a relationship. And I think the latter one is a fair point for both men and women: Immediate chemistry and attraction is not necessarily a sign of long-term compatibility, or rather or not someone makes a good spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/24 01:03 AM
–

You can’t really cast out feminists; it’s not a country club. You can argue with them really vigorously, but that’s about it. Sure you can. They managed to do it to Sarah Palin because of her pro-life stances. They manage to isolate the trans-critical feminists fairly well as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:51 PM
–

Of course men have to be taught to not rape. Just as both men and women need to be taught to not steal. People need to be taught to respect other's rights because it's not naturally inborn.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:19 PM
1

O May - Fiddlesticks comes to mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/24 09:29 PM
3

Perhaps they have been reading too much loss porn on /r/wallstreetbets...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/24 04:25 AM
5

Self defense is not about holding people accountable, it's about eliminating the immediate threat. Your right to self defense goes away if the opponent stops fighting, even if you haven't yet landed a punch. The physical disparities can impact how much threat there is, but that threat of a physical attacker intending to do harm isn't zero. It may limit the amount of force one is permitted to use in such a situation, but that level of force is also not zero. Just because the harm doesn't raise to…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/24 04:22 AM
1

The phrase 'in anger' doesn't mean 'because you're angry'. It means 'for real', as opposed to some sort of training exercise or the like. I'm not sure we actually disagree here, beyond this little question about the definition of a phrase. Self defense may involve throwing real punches intended to cause harm. That is doing things 'in anger', but that defense goes away when the threat goes away. You're not permitted to continue a fight that when the opponent has yielded or fled and call it 'self …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/24 04:15 AM
0

Him doing it in self defense is different from him doing it in anger. Is there?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/24 03:54 AM
1

This turns into something of a self-fulfilling prophesy. A big part of why folks who get married younger than their early 20s have lower rates of marital success is the disapproval of their families and communities.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/24 08:41 PM
3

If he's unemployed, why would you folks need daycare? Isn't school generally covered by the local taxpayer aside from things like school supplies that you'd likely need for the child regardless?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/24 01:06 PM
1

Return on investments and dividends? Are you really a trust fund baby if you assembled most of your own funds and they're not in a trust?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/24 12:04 PM
10

Right, it's OK if he does it for himself and because he loves luxury cars, not solely to impress women At some point, I'd rather be smiling in the driver's seat of my $3,000 XJ than crying in the back of my $200,000 S-Class (or whatever).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 07:31 PM
29

From personal experience, focusing on yourself and having fun usually attracts women. From personal experience, you still have to make dating happen or it's not going to happen. Just living a good life isn't enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/24 05:44 PM
10

An example for the third category would be when people state that family courts are harshly biased against fathers - I will admit, this varies by country and I do believe the role of fathers as caregivers is under appreciated (a disservice to everyone). However - at least in my country - fathers rarely fight for custody (approximately 7% of the time). When they do, 92% will receive full custody or joint custody. I don’t believe telling fathers that they simply won’t get custody is helpful - mayb…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/24 10:56 AM
5

And how do you even know how you feel? And are your feelings the only thing that matters? Choosing a spouse is the most impactful decision you'll ever make. Leaving that all to chance and things like the 'spark' and whatnot seems foolish. You may be searching for criteria that just don't matter in the longer run and ignoring things that really do. And... Not everyone has the good fortune to just have a romantic relationship just fall into their lap. Sometimes it takes a lot more work than "just …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/02/24 07:50 PM
11

Better get a bulk rate on wedding cake...
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/24 07:46 PM
31

And here we have the 'if you have to think about it, it's not genuine' line of reasoning that I just can't stand. Sometimes one shows genuine interest with calculated behavior and there is nothing wrong with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/24 04:19 PM
9

"Liberal" here is an overloaded term politically that has some pretty different meanings in different political cultures.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/24 08:47 AM
9

Asking girls out on normal traditional dates (Drink, coffee, walk in the park, ice skating, ice cream), That's something that does require thinking and planning and specific effort though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/24 12:43 AM
1

Also talking is not that hard between sets or shit. You mean at intermission?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/24 12:10 AM
3

women into being too stupid to differentiate "sales pitches" from confidence. It's not women who are 'too stupid' to differentiate "sales pitches" from confidence. It's people. This is a known flaw in human reasoning were even very wrong things said very confidently are considered right by folks hearing them.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/24 08:51 PM
1

"Don't work on your career, you will get a high paying job when you least expect it" Amusingly enough, that actually did happen to me once. Recruiters contacting you isn't uncommon in my industry. Yeah, you still have to be qualified (having a relevant degree helps) and do a sequence of interviews and I did get lucky there too. But it dis start from the recruiter contacting me.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/24 06:03 AM
0

It's amusing that Elon's political beliefs come up rather than his habit of fathering children out of wedlock and trying to pull the whole "I'm the alpha in the relationship" card with his ex-wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 11:34 PM
1

More or less, yes? Why would I have ordered something I didn't like?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/24 05:52 AM
1

As others have noted, such women were probably not into a guy in the first place. But, why? That's the part folks skip over here: Why is it that they weren't into this guy to start with?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/24 11:17 PM
1

Not this, "Just go out and feel the world and just be good and have happy vibes and let it all resonate and come into sync" shit. I'm to the point where I cringe a bit every time I hear the word 'vibes' outside of the context of referring to the vibraphone.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 08:45 PM
1

Not every decision in life is so easily recoverable. Get hooked on addictive drugs and there's a hellofa cost to pay to get off of them. As a pilot, if you off into hard IMC without experience in instrument flying is probably going to get you and any passengers you're carrying killed. How many folks have confidently lost fortunes gambling? No, self doubt is the same thing as humility in my mind. A mark of good character, the kind personality trait that makes you more kind to those around you and…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 07:11 AM
1

Be the best man you can be first, not because women will think it’s hot, but because it’s easier to go out and do more difficult stuff like dating unencumbered by self-doubt and insecurity. I think you have a different idea of what makes someone a good person than I do. I think self-doubt is something of a virtue. Overconfidence is what gets you and those around you hurt.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/24 10:18 PM
1

Do women tell other men to be vulnerable because of: Social desirability bias. They say that because it's the politically correct thing to say and the alternative just sounds mean and heartless (because it kinda is). Folks don't wanna think that they're the bad guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/24 10:54 PM
2

If love and sex really are that unimportant, why does it matter then? Why is this the great civil rights movement of our time when it asking folks to live a celebrate life is no more of a sacrifice than asking them to give up plastic straws or something like that? Particularly in the modern era where legal equality in this area is widely accepted in the western world. Most of the LGBT advocacy here and now isn't about laws threatening to put people in jail, but about social norms here. And socia…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/24 06:10 AM
12

"Online dating isn't real life. Get out there and touch grass" vs "Approaching strange women in public is predatory and makes you a sex pest because you're a potential rapist. Women are out and about living their lives and don't want to be bothered by people like you". "Women don't want someone chatting them up just because they're good looking. You know nothing else about a strange woman, why are you even talking to her?" vs "If you become friends with someone you have romantic feelings for, yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/24 11:37 PM
0

It's a bit late for that. I listened to advice like the kind you're giving and that's what's the root cause of a lot of my problems. Yeah, I'm going to voice some issues with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/24 04:34 PM
1

When 'self improvement' becomes a reason to not specifically pursue a relationship it starts to do more harm than good. In my own situation, yeah it's nice not worrying about money after getting laid off. I'd still rather have a wife and family by this point in life. And now because I followed bad advice around 'self improvement' earlier in life that's probably not going to happen. Hence why I'm hostile to such advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/24 06:31 AM
2

People focus a lot on finding "the one" and not "being the one". Focusing on other relationships in your life/other activities/ your career/your fitness etc. those things make you attractive (going to therapy for example is a way to get you on the path of self-improvement). Seeking out companionship super aggressively/saying yes to whoever comes your way more often than not can land you in an unsatisfying or at worse toxic relationship. The problem is you can find yourself in something of a fore…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/24 05:54 AM
5

Meh... I got banned there for answering someone's question of "why do redpillers not want to date single mothers". I get that it's not a debate sub, but such an action does seem like they're not attacking the best version of their opponent's ideas.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/24 04:48 AM
1

Try navigating to his or her user page: u/Ok-Principle-3785 That's failing to me, which indicates something of a shadow ban.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/24 11:49 PM
6

For example any speech that insights panic such as screaming “fire” in a crowded theater was banned by the original founding fathers In the case that coined the phrase 'Fire in a crowded theater' the speech in question, the speech that Oliver Wendel Holmes said was akin to yelling 'fire' in a crowded theater, were anti-war protests that were against US involvement in World War I.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/24 06:19 AM
1

I've spent my life waiting for marriage. So... Where do I find a worthy wife then? We live in a world where hookup culture is the default and dating for marriage generally doesn't have the kind of institutions to support it that it once had to the point that I despite all the efforts I've made in trying to be a good provider and a good husband that I doubt I'll find a wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/24 03:56 PM
6

In terms of actual wealth, yeah sure. Wealth isn't a zero-sum game. But status and power are. And it's status and power that women find attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/24 03:24 PM
3

Men who don’t like hook up culture don’t have to participate in it. Men who want to get married can date for marriage. Can they? Y'all tore down the culture that supported this.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/24 03:19 PM
–

Just because a trait is encountered at manipulative people, doesn't mean normal people don't have it. No, but this isn't a kind of 'Hitler was a vegetarian' kind of point either. Confidence is how manipulative people manipulate. I'd go so far as to say that confidence is almost always a sign of dishonesty. An honest look at many things in life requires the kind of nuance that most folks read as a lack of confidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/24 10:34 AM
–

But, monkeys don't drive trucks. I agree with your overall point here, but I'd be careful relying too much on that one study.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/24 10:29 AM
–

Not really. They're neutral or perhaps even negative in some situations. Humor can be cutting sardonic contempt. Charisma and confidence often are the mark of a manipulative and smarmy approach to relationships with other people.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/24 10:15 AM
1

are you not religious? I'm not. or why do you think you have struggled to meet someone? I'm not sure at this point. I think it just took me too long to get onto the starting line and get my career and savings going.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/23 12:47 AM
2

Yes. And? How's that relevant to my comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/23 12:14 AM
5

also i was a late virgin in my 20s trying desperately to get married so i don't buy that men who genuinely want this are unable to find women. I'm a virgin in my mid 30's who has wanted to be a good husband more than anything for as long as he can remember. We're out there. Believe it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/23 11:20 PM
1

Shaming and blaming for behaviors that are literally baked into us at a cellular level. That's civilization for you. We need a culture that does this for a lot of things so that we develop a sense to control our worse impulses to keep us from harming our fellow human beings in ways that feel natural and good.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/23 08:00 AM
2

It's a two party system. You have to vote for one of us.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/23 03:06 AM
1

Interacting in general isn't the same thing as dating though. Folks give this advice and while it's not bad per se, it doesn't necessarily solve the problem. It's not platonic interactions with women that causes fear, it's the possibility of love, romance and yes sex that's scary. Guys have been told their entire life that their desires here are predatory. It's a hard idea to overcome.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 10:34 PM
3

Dating is a subset of socialization, or at least closely tied to it. Sure. But it's not the same thing. There are a lot of things specific to dating that don't get replicated in other social interactions. Do you not try and meet dating prospects through socializing, like most people do? I thought that was 'just pretending to be her friend to get into her pants', no? My friend group really doesn't have that many eligible women.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 01:47 PM
1

I resent the effort I have to put into the dating process. I'm somewhat envious of just how easy it can be for women at times, even if that does come with some downsides. So, no I don't resent women per se. Though, I do kinda fear them. For me, no part of this is 'spontaneous'. I have to make an effort to make an interaction go towards the direction of romantic interest and I just don't know how to do that. And if I screw it up, it comes at a cost.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 01:37 PM
3

"Touch grass and socialize" isn't the same thing as trying to date though.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 02:22 AM
6

The problem is that the early stages of dating really just aren't all that enjoyable. Saying 'learn to enjoy dating' feels a bit like 'learn to enjoy having a root canal' to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 02:21 AM
5

Well what made you think there was chemistry to begin with before hitting on her? What did you misinterpret? What can you do differently to create chemistry? Getting the "I didn't feel a romantic spark" message doesn't answer any of these questions. Which is exactly my point: I haven't a clue what I can do differently and that rejection didn't help me get better at that. Instead, it just cost me a once in a lifetime chance with someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 02:20 AM
3

Lots of folks say 'Oh, you don't like the process of dating? Take a break and work on yourself.'.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 02:16 AM
12

When the shoe's on the other foot, there's a whole lot of effort extended into changing what people want. Women get folks talking about 'unrealistic beauty standards' and a cultural movement to suggest than men's expectations are unfair and should be changed.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 02:15 AM
9

Rejection is normal, it's all practice. You should learn from the rejections. What is there to learn from "I just don't feel a romantic spark"? There's nothing there that helps you behave in such a way to change that, and even if there was the next woman apparently might want something entirely different that you somehow have to guess at in the brief window you have.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 02:13 AM
1

If they're the government issuing a license or security clearance, they can always say "tell us under penalty of purgatory".
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/23 08:34 PM
0

Could you expand on this? It could simply be all your fault. I get the impression your lack of relationships may have impacted you communicate skills. I was slow in graduating college, and slow in getting started in my professional career. A good husband is a good provider and thus I had no business dating anyone until I knew I could provide for them. But for most folks that happens before their mid-twenties. For me, I wasn't really there until nearly 30, and getting fired from a job for underpr…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/23 01:33 AM
1

Folks with fewer premarital partners are also happier in their marriages. So, no, it's not just external pressure here. It’s ridiculous to believe that someone who has had 6 sexual encounters is going to cheat on you, simply because they’ve had sex before they knew you, and if you’ve narrowed your dating pool down THAT much then good luck finding a partner. It's not just are they going to cheat... It's are they going to leave because they view me as replaceable. And perhaps, in terms of base des…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/23 01:30 AM
0

Why do you think that might be? Because it took me too long to get to the starting line. All the good marriageable women are taken now. You're probably going to be very disappointed by marriage when it comes it and actually not a that suitable for it. Why do you figure that? It seems like a lasting relationship is very different than trying to continually meet strangers.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/23 01:20 AM
1

I certainly tried, but I never made it very far in dating anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/23 12:55 AM
0

Right? Like you haven’t met- so how can you expect someone you haven’t met to already be committed to you? But she presumably knew that she wanted to be a wife someday, no? If not, It's a sign that she's only interested in marriage when it's convenient to her. If so, it's a sign that it really wasn't that important to her. Even if she hasn't met me, specifically she should know and think about what her future husband would want just as I've lived my life thinking about my future wife would want.…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/23 11:40 PM
-1

In my case, it's motivated by me trying to be a good husband and show my commitment to her. I made that sacrifice for her and our future marriage. I have to wonder why I'm not deserving of the same consideration.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/23 10:54 PM
1

And I didn't get to do any of that because I spent that time waiting and trying to make myself into a good husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/23 09:50 PM
1

I'm agnostic.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/23 09:38 PM
-1

have endless sexual partners (women average 7 in a lifetime, men average 8). That's still a lot to me. I've spent my life waiting for the one I'm going to marry. Someone having 6 partners prior to me feels like she just doesn't care about the marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/23 01:48 PM
0

Then, there's the economic aspect. A man's economic status and finance is very important to women, but we live in an era in which wages are stagnating while everything else is getting more expensive. But median real wages are up from 1979.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/23 11:27 PM
6

Yes, it is. Why wouldn't be? Folks quit smoking because they see the statistics linking smoking to all kinds of illness and an early death. Folks choose were to live based on the state of the job market there and the quality of the local school district. Folks use reason and statistics for all sorts of decisions in life. Why is it weird to think like that here?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/23 07:32 AM
2

Can a Prenup even address questions of custody?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/23 01:53 AM
1

But if you do value women for other reasons and actually like other things about them, then you should try to date. But that doesn't conflict with hating dating. One can want a real relationship with another person and detest all the process to get there.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/23 06:58 PM
1

That's still pretty close to talking to strangers in my mind. How do you even know if you're interested at that stage?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/23 06:26 PM
1

If I don't date anyone, how am I supposed to find a wife?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/23 06:22 AM
7

We're told over and over again that wanting to get to know someone before displaying romantic attraction is 'only pretending to be her friend to get into her pants' and simultaneously that it's weird and vaguely threatening to ask someone out right away. I'm still not sure what that leaves.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/23 05:31 AM
2

I've hit that in my career, but that was me mostly getting lucky with the RSUs. Most mid-career generalist software engineers in my area (SF Bay Area) are just a bit below that. There are people who earn more than that clearly, but it's still well above average in an industry and region that's known for well above average income.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 08:32 AM
1

Total comp or base salary?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 07:43 AM
6

At the end of the day, friends are not family. They're important, sure. But it's not the same thing as a spouse and you know it. It's not a substitute because the kind of human connection is not the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 07:30 PM
5

You probably wouldn't. How would you get to know someone you might be interested in without 'hitting on them'? How do you express desire for someone you have gotten to know without it being 'you were just pretending to be her friend to get into her pants'?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 07:27 PM
8

So you can socialize with people unless you want a relationship with them then? How exactly is supposed to find a partner in your social circle if that's the rules?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 07:15 PM
5

Those are two separate things, you can socialize with people without hitting on them. If you're attracted to someone and want there to be a relationship, can you? Isn't everything you say under that circumstance 'hitting on them' to some degree or other?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 06:50 PM
12

There's lots of folks saying how these are places you're not supposed to socialize because folks are there for other purposes. See all the 'don't hit on women at the gym' kind posts. Or the hackerspaces that have signs posted explicitly decrying such behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 06:37 PM
1

Lots of people tell men in no uncertain terms that 'nobody cares about their boner', and that lust alone is a terrible way to choose a partner for a long term relationship. See also all the 'of course you're alone, you want a supermodel' or 'don't stick your dick in crazy' comments for other examples of this applied to men. There are reasonable versions of this argument on both sides. Oftentimes what we lust after really isn't good relationship material. Maximizing the feelings of lustiness ofte…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 07:55 PM
–

Ok, this is tiring. If you know every possible outcome, why don't you fucking use the one that works and stop complaining about it? Because that's not permitted either. "Oh, you're only here to hit on women? Creep!".
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/23 06:08 PM
9

Why would you even date someone who you don't know??? Because we're told that getting to know someone first is 'pretending to be their friend to get into their pants'? Or because waiting too long gets you typecast as a platonic friend? I'd rather do things slower and get to know someone first. But that doesn't seem to be the way dating works for most people here in my own admittedly limited experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 05:45 PM
1

If a person comes up to me on the street and wants to know how much cash I have in my wallet, it is immoral to say anything but the truth? 'None of your business' isn't a lie.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 06:31 PM
6

But that doesn't keep women safe because the kind of men who get the message that they're evil for having romantic desires are not the folks who would have been murdering people for turning them down.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 06:21 PM
1

Like 'millionaire' is a lot of money. Inflation's a thing people. $1,000,000 in 1980 has the buying power of $3,946,000 today.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/23 02:02 AM
–

When the shoe is on the other foot we're told that we have 'unrealistic beauty standards' and shouldn't have such high standards of women's physical appearance. Where's the folks telling women that their immediate feelings of lust are not the only thing that matters and can come into conflict with their other values?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/23 03:39 PM
-1

You want a traditional woman? Pay all of the bills, put a ring on it, and don't expect sex before the wedding. Deal. Now where do I sign up?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/23 01:43 AM
–

-You cant "lock down" a human being. This might be surprising but people have free will and if someone in a relationship wants to leave at any time they can! There are, or at least should be, major social consequences for breaking ones wedding vows. And even without that, the carrot of shared history and affection is well worth it even without that stick. -Luring a man into a relationship based on your youthful looks isnt logical- because we all age. No women wants a husband who isnt attracted t…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 10:58 AM
2

I think it gets harder for everyone, both men and women. The best candidates are already married or on their way to being married by then.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 10:49 AM
1

Also the “gym culture” is closely linked to the “personal fitness” culture where there is a slew of “add on products and diets” designed to maximise the journey and generate someone profit in a way someone just cycling, swimming or going for a jog won’t. You haven't seen the kind of money roadies pay to shed a few grams from their bicycles.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 06:47 AM
1

Socializing is not "work". Dating is not "work" I'm sorry, but yes it is. These things are fun and healthy and good for the psychology if it's just done correctly without an attachment to any particular outcome. If it weren't for the possibility of a particular outcome, why would I put in the effort? If I were happy with dying alone, I wouldn't bother with dating. It's because I want a partner that I put up with the anxiety and effort of dating. Take away the possibility of that outcome and it's…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 06:44 AM
1

Your conclusions are nonsensical and don't take into account the fact that men usually bring more financial assets to the table before and after mairrage. Assets that predate the marriage are not marital assets and even in community property states generally not going to be part of the divorce if they're kept separate from marital assets.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 08:10 AM
2

That parent has no responsibility to see that that money in any way benefits the child. They kinda do: If they're a neglectful toward the child they're going face criminal legal consequences.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 05:31 AM
6

I read the OP many times and quoted the bits I was responding to. I followed your citation and it's citations when I could (one of them didn't load). There isn't really a response to the argument I'm making in there. From the op: "MeN OnLy AgReE BeCaUsE ThEy KnOw ThEy'LL LoSe" I hear some bleating. Except, that, too, is false. When men fight for custody, they get it 92% of the time This makes the assumption that if only every man fought custody they'd get some level of custody 92% of the time. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 02:42 AM
5

The evidence provided in the OP. What evidence? Be specific here, what evidence do you have that there isn't a survivorship bias in what cases get settled through judicial intervention being the kind of cases that are most likely to favor a man retaining custody rights? Because I didn't really see an argument or any evidence to that effect in the OP. The population of cases that seek judicial settlement are not the same population of cases that get settled between the parents themselves. No, the…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 02:15 AM
3

It's not my job to provide evidence for your claims. I've provided evidence in support of my claim in the OP. If you want to refute it, then you need to provide evidence to do so. That's how debate works. What evidence do you have that supports your explanation of the facts over mine? I'm not trying to refute your cited statistics here as a factual matter, I'm suggesting that if it's true that "The vast majority (80%) of custody arrangements are reached between the mother and father on their own…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 01:04 AM
4

And as soon as you provide evidence of that, that's a discussion that we can have. If we're just making claims, I can just as easily say that the ones who don't ask for more custody don't want more time with their kids. The same stats you cite fit my explanation just as much as they fit yours. What possible evidence could exist to control for the effect of survivorship bias? But this demonstrates that if a dad doesn't have joint custody, the reason is statistically because a) he agreed to it and…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 12:24 AM
6

Myth: In court, custody always favors the mother The vast majority (80%) of custody arrangements are reached between the mother and father on their own. Another 11% are reached through mediation, 5% are through custody evaluation, and 4% are from custody trial. So 91% of custody agreements are reached without any involvement from family court and only 4% actually come from a full-blown custody dispute. "MeN OnLy AgReE BeCaUsE ThEy KnOw ThEy'LL LoSe" I hear some bleating. Except, that, too, is fa…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 10:53 PM
1

I've waited my whole life. Waiting a few more months or years isn't that big a deal if they waited for me too.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 07:54 AM
4

If you're divorcing without a serious reason like infidelity or abuse, yeah you are the monster. You're the one betraying your vows in that case.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 08:42 PM
3

It's all about spark, chemistry, butterflies, whatever you call it. This is a foolish way to choose a partner. All of these are fickle, often mistaken signs that fade away as one gets used to someone's presence and personality. At the end of the day, love is a choice. One you have to keep making if you want to continue to have a relationship. And we can't explain or analyze what is pulling us to that person. Can't we? If you have a few minutes, go listen to the first movement of the Elgar Cello …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 11:25 AM
-1

:) i am not going to spell it out, i think everyone who is reading can see how i proved my point. I'm not sure what you proved here. Does being secure mean having to be okay with being wronged? Do you have to put up with abuse or infidelity to truly be secure in your mind? The number of sexual partners in the past doesn't affect that though. I just don't agree with that. I don't think that's actually true.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 11:06 AM
-2

What is the negative experience of less closeness? A higher risk of divorce for one. The idea that I'm more replaceable to her than she is to me. The other idea that I 'paid' full price to never have that experience that she just gave away to someone else? Beyond that.. Isn't this whole emotional closeness the whole point? Or a pretty big part of it?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 10:00 AM
-1

I spent my life waiting. I want the experience of being someone's first and thew closeness that comes from that. Am I insecure for asking for that when I've done the same for that? Wouldn't it be more insecure to 'look the other way' knowing how it will bother you that you'll never get that experience for fear that there's nobody left?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 09:43 AM
–

I'd argue that most of 'sexual comparability' is made, not found. This isn't some immutable trait to be discovered on your own, but something to be created witin the couple.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 09:46 AM
1

There is so much hate towards trans folks right now, why would anyone go through that “as a joke”? Selma envy. Or the fact that one does have chorus of folks saying how one is brave and beautiful for 'coming out', how they're part of the oh-so-loving LGBT community now that they have adopted this identity. Or, yeah for the attention. Or because someone told them that all of their troubles would go away if they went through with this and admitting that they've only gotten worse will cost them wha…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/23 09:05 PM
3

No, the individuals guilty of that conduct should face jail time and the system should attempt to identify them and make them face due process of law.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/23 08:54 PM
-5

People who aren’t are not worse spouses, they are worse spouses for you. Your preferences are valid but they aren’t universal truth that everyone should obey. No, I don't think that's the case. I think everyone would be better off if they followed these rules. This is why I live by them myself. Other choices are worse, they result in worse outcomes and worse marriages. I wouldn't have made the decisions I did if I didn't believe that to be the case. In other words, I preach what I practice here.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 12:40 PM
-3

How does that mean that you can’t degrade women who slept with multiple people? My reason for wanting to date a virgin and my reason for being a virgin is because I think that people who wait for marriage are better spouses which logically implies that those who don't are worse spouses. There's not really a way around this. You can absolutely choose to date a virgin no body will or can stop you. Folks are trying: There's a lot of social pressure that calls this 'slut shaming' though. And look at…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 12:34 PM
0

You can selectively date women with a low body count and not go out of your way to degrade women who have. I'm not sure that you can really. I waited because I though it was the right thing to do. The way for me to be a good husband someday. I expect the same going the other way. To do otherwise to me suggests that one wasn't thinking of their future marriage and doesn't regard it to be important. Deep down, I think I'm right which means I think they're wrong. I wouldn't have lived the way I liv…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 12:28 PM
1

I'd have been happy to find a wife and settle down 10 years ago. I just wish enough women had wanted men then so that would have been a possibility.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 09:00 AM
13

Yes. It's a sign that you don't really care about your future spouse and your future marriage. Because if you did care, you'd have waited for them. It might not be as big a betrayal as infidelity, sure. But it's not nothing either.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 08:57 AM
2

If you're choosing a partner, does it even matter which way the correlation goes?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 08:52 AM
–

But most guys are wanted by someone Are they? How often are they asked out on a date then? Because most men report that this is something that's either rare or has never happened.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 02:15 AM
2

Some 30% of couples meet online these days. That's significant, perhaps to the point of being representative.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 04:07 AM
29

But the effect from having fewer partners still exists even when controlling for religion.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 03:48 AM
1

I think some people are "having their fun" and then settling down, but I don't think this is the vast majority really. The vast majority of people have several partners before they get married. What about 'learning' here requires sleeping with folks, huh? I think people call the learning process having their fun because dating can be a lot of fun for some people. I didn't really find it that way, but most people would say I was too serious for a girl that age and in many ways, taking it so serio…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 03:44 AM
2

I'd probably discuss with them the process of learning what it takes to form and keep a long term adult relationship and the differences between a mature cohabitation and connection and young people relationships. We had a social norm about how sleeping around would impact your future relationships. Folks were quite aware of the impacts of their decisions, but made them anyways. This isn't 'learning', this is 'I wanna have my fun now and settle down later'. Statistically speaking, the Alpha isn'…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/23 07:10 PM
1

What we see is that whether you go by the median, the mean, or the 80th percentile, the numbers remain remarkably stable across the years. Even the more promiscuous women don't appear to be becoming any more promiscuous than they were 20 years ago. So it seems like claims of wildly escalating female promiscuity is highly overblown. Compared to... When? 20 years ago was still post sexual revolution. Compare that to the early 1960s when most folks had only one partner in a lifetime, 3 is still a l…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/23 08:37 AM
2

They don't judge unprovoked however, the second you judge someone, I think it's fair game that you get it leveraged back at you. Is it though? The sex-pozzies go on and on about all the advantages of casual sex. Hell, some go on to say that it's mandatory for one's future wellbeing in the same ways that conservatives argue that it's detrimental? To try and boast that your lack of inclusivity and freedom of thought makes it easier for you to remain consistent isn't much of a flex imo lol. Inclusi…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 01:02 AM
8

One of the supposed principles of the 'sex-positive' movement is being non-judgemental of other's sexual behavior. But they throw this principle out when it's time to score points against their political opponents. Saying 'conservatives do this too' doesn't quite work because conservatives don't hold this as a principle. They instead say that yes, they are judging people and that they think their criteria is what leads to a better life.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 12:36 AM
6

This happens on both sides, like red pill or conservatives insisting women that are feminism can't get a man and just live with a bunch of cats. The conservatives don't have a supposed principle that prohibits criticism based on one's behavior in this area of life though. We think we're right about how to live our lives and that's why we behave in the ways we do and why we suggest others do the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 12:20 AM
14

You'll first need to demonstrate that left wing feminism as a whole does this. See all the discourse around 'unrealistic beauty standards'. Sure, that's not universal within feminism, but it certainly is mainstream and not just some nuts out in the weeds. Oh god, this again. This is a simple misconstruing of people's words. Someone calls a guy an incel and you'll use your own confirmation biases to lead you to the conclusion that they hate virgin men when in reality they're basically just accusi…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 12:12 AM
25

I don't think this is a 'slip up' though: Left wing feminists demand men reconsider their romantic desire, but make no such considerations for themselves. The sex-positive feminist movement screams endlessly about 'no judgement', only to turn around and engage in virgin shaming the moment it's convenient to them. This is purposeful. They don't have any principles besides 'we win, they lose'.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/23 11:46 PM
3

Are straight men anti-gay if they aren't interested in a pick up attempt by a flamboyant homosexual? They are if they seek social norms that prevent that gay man from even voicing his romantic desires pretty much everywhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 08:28 AM
2

There's no checklist for when it's 100% okay to ask women out because women are not a monolith. Furthermore, it is not women's job to be available for approaching. If you're unsure, leave them alone. Doesn't the first point in this mean that you'll always be unsure?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 09:55 PM
3

No, we only have it good in the US because of economic growth. Why do you think people choose to work in factories in the first place? Why would they choose that over a life on the farm back at the turn of the century?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 09:46 PM
1

I've found it's quite the opposite: The longer you wait, the harder it gets. The kind of woman who would make a good wife generally values marriage highly and as a result gets married young. By the time you're in your 30s, the set of women who are still single are usually that way because they valued other things over marriage and behaved accordingly.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 09:52 PM
2

The majority of taxes in US goes to the military. This just isn't true, even talking about just the federal government. Military spending is dwarfed by Social Security and Medicare.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 07:27 PM
2

There's something fishy about this post...
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 10:09 AM
0

You speak as if 'sexual comparability' is innate, inborn and immutable. I don't really think it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 07:04 PM
4

Because it's a proxy: How much do you care about your future spouse and your future marriage? I waited because I care a lot. What does it say about a potential partner if they didn't?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 12:27 AM
1

Most women have fewer than 10 sexual partners in their lives. That's still a lot. Did someone who have 10 sexual partners in their life really expect to marry every one?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/23 06:54 AM
1

I don't think that it's necessary to view other people as 'purchasable goods' to make the analogy work. We're all individual actors in the economy just as we are in the dating market, making our own decisions as to what we value and what we're willing to provide in exchange for that. The fact that my heart, nor my friendship can be purchased for cash money doesn't mean that there isn't an exchange here.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/23 08:41 AM
9

So no, the vast majority of men won't marry a 21-23 year old chick unless they want to get married extremely early themselves. Which they don't seem to want. There's nothing I would have wanted more. But I was told to wait and 'don't worry, it'll happen when you least suspect it'. And it never did. And statistically, he will almost certainly still marry a woman who also has a sexual history, is not sexually pure, but he will have a worse attitude towards her because of his setup, and she will pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/23 09:43 AM
3

What's Instagram?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/23 02:56 AM
2

But your claim is a bit more restrictive than even that. You're suggesting that women can sense that you feel that way, no matter how much you hide it. It's saying if you feel lonely or rejected you have no business seeking a relationship. Which... Is a bit absurd.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 11:07 PM
9

In other words, "suffer in silence, because talking about how you feel is unattractive", no?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 07:56 PM
10

Rapport with no romantic or sexual escalation = friend zone. The problem is that we have a bunch of folks making young men afraid to escalate romantically or sexually because it's seen as predatory.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 11:54 PM
1

Do the kind of folks that give the advice of 'talk to women like they're people (whatever that means) know that? That's hardly clear at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 10:03 PM
1

Or it could be that your average man's response is "I don't believe you, this is clearly some kind of trick to hurt me" when you claim that there's a woman potentially interested in them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 10:41 AM
6

Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 05:47 PM
11

Why should I support a cultural movement that makes it impossible for me to find a wife? A movement that's left a trail of heartache and divorce in it's wake? Why is valuing hedonism above all else the 'right thing to do'?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 11:48 AM
4

If I saw a lot of flashy branded accessories and depreciating assets like cars that cost loads to maintain and repair, I would have concerns about how our spending priorities match. If i saw photos of travel, charity events, nice dinners, then I know we might be more suited. It's not like travel and nice dinners have a positive return on investment either. Consumption is consumption here, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 02:32 AM
4

Except they ban people who don't tow the party line in its entirety.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/23 06:44 PM
17

I got banned there after trying to answer the question of "why does red pill hate single mothers", while still voicing criticism of the 'red pill' crowd in the process. What was the point of even asking the question if the only allowable answer was 'cuz they hate women, duh'?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/23 06:42 PM
5

Besides, in a tribal society rape would not be illegal so women would also get raped by stronger men and they'd just have to deal with it. I wouldn't be so sure of that. Folks wouldn't take too kindly to harming their wives and daughters. And in a world before law, the answer to this might just be killing or exiling you and deservedly so.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/23 11:46 AM
6

That seems like an awfully steep glideslope. What are we approaching in, a Helicopter?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/22 02:03 AM
2

Attraction is a lot more than just sex. But the fact that you said that speaks volumes about how you value the woman you have had relationships with. Sex is the difference between a close personal friendship and a romantic relationship. So, yes... It matters. Unless your position is that sexual or romantic desire is devaluing of the partner, I'm not sure I see your point. Source for feminism says male attraction is predatory? Never heard that shit before. Untitled makes the case a lot better tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/22 10:36 PM
2

Discrimination has nothing to do with anything unless incels are being discriminated in bakeries or some shit. Don’t think that’s real. Don't you remember that tweet about how every major tech company has incels in its midst and asking what they're going to do about it? Nobody is forcing celibacy on men. Where did you get that from??? The feminists' condemnation of all male romantic interest as predatory? Saying “society doesn’t owe you a trophy wife” isn’t the same as saying “you are forced to …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/22 09:32 PM
3

Trying to strawman argument me? No, I'm trying to point out a conflict in reasoning here. Government should not be in the bedroom. Ah, but LGBT advocates want far more than the government out of the bedroom. They want the government to step in and prevent even private citizens from discriminating against gay folks in most aspects of life. And their entire argument to this end is to say 'born this way': Who they want to have sex with is so fundamental to their identity that they can't be reasonab…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/22 08:56 PM
1

Sex is not a need, this needs to be beaten into some people apparently. Then why doesn't this apply to gay marriage? Would you really accept an argument that says "Actually, the gays really don't need to have sex and so therefore bias against gay folks isn't a big deal because they can just choose to not have sex"?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/22 08:19 PM
3

Considering the VAST majority of actual rapists will never ever see any repercussions, let alone jail time, the handful of false rape claims (which are also obviously not a good thing) are far from the biggest concern around rape. The problem with this argument is that it's frequently used to justify a 'believe women' standard of proof that bypasses most notions of due process. That's still a major concern.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/22 09:50 PM
5

Just because an equal number of men and women end up in relationships doesn't mean that they put an equal amount of effort to get there.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/22 09:48 PM
2

Just look who's happier in their relationships. Who has the lower rate of divorce. Turns out the hedonistic 'if it feels good do it' ethics of sexuality leave quite a bit of pain in their wake, which is why we have a lot of these values in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/22 07:51 PM
2

What would be the rationality for those of us who aren’t religious to be traditional and conservative? The argument that their values are a fundamentally better way to live?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/22 07:16 PM
6

Personality has some pretty big genetic and upbringing components to it that are just as immutable as height.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 11:26 PM
2

There really are not. Most women look down men who are in that position. That's why divorce is so much more common when the woman out earns the man.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/22 09:27 AM
1

It's a privilege to watch your children grow up and play such a key role in raising them. If it weren't for the cultural demands that I be a provider, I'd much rather be the stay at home parent.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/22 09:31 PM
2

I wanted to be a good husband at 20. Where were these piles of women?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/22 06:44 AM
1

30 years old is old enough that my children will never know their grandfather. Why are you so focused on how hard dating is? Because I'm wanting to solve this problem. I want love and marriage. Am I supposed to turn off the rational problem-solving part of my brain on this in particular?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/22 11:12 PM
8

Conflict #1 - Men here tell women to "choose better", yet get offended when women are shown to be more picky on dating apps. Does "choosing better" only apply, when she's choosing YOU? Another way to put this: "I'd make a good husband/boyfriend, but I can't get over the initial phases of dating. Why is it the guy who beats his wife or girlfriend doing so much better than I?". I think there can be valid complaint down this road: Being initially attractive doesn't necessarily make one a good husba…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 06:32 PM
5

"expressing emotions is feminine, be stoic bro". Men are literally creating a world that will make them obsolete, and they don't do anything about it. This is given as advice on how to meet women's expectations of men they're romantically interested in.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 11:34 PM
3

So, you're entitled to the use of other's investments? That business you work through doesn't simply exist, you know. It exists because the investors put their money up in an effort to turn a profit. That's also why that job exists in the first place. Without investment and markets, how do you figure out what is worth doing? What is profitable?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 08:27 AM
1

Women are just humans and have similar thought processes to men. Humans are complicated. Indeed, far more complicated and impossible to genuinely understand than rocket engineering is.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 01:53 AM
4

If you have some other means of either creating these things for your self or giving something of value to those who do, sure. Participating in the labor market tends to be the easiest and least risky way, but one can choose others like starting one's own business and the like. You just don't get the fruits of other's labor without their consent.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 01:24 AM
6

But what if you don't agree? What happens? The transaction doesn't happen. They don't get your labor, you don't get their money and we both look for someone else to deal with who's offering terms closer to our liking.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 01:17 AM
11

Selling yourself. Indeed. But I agreed to selling my labor and I agreed to the rate they paid me. Likely to generate way more profit for someone else. Indeed, but they paid me what we agreed to regardless of if they turned a profit or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 01:07 AM
13

Or I can live off of return from my investments. Or go into business for myself. Or buy a tact of land and become self sufficient off-grid. The idea that we must produce in order to consume isn't a feature of capitalism, it's a feature of life. Capitalism just gives me a lot more choice as to how that happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 12:46 AM
13

Then I have to find some other way to create value. The alternative is that other folks have to give me stuff rather or not they consent.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 12:44 AM
7

I pull from my savings to pay for my food, fuel, and the like?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 12:38 AM
20

Capitalism is all about consent: My labor is my own and can only be purchased with my consent. My investments are given only with my consent. My purchases are only made if I feel that they're worthwhile.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 12:34 AM
5

Am I saying the solution is to become religious, or push the culture in a more conservative direction? No. I think the more realistic one is to stop making romantic relationships a point of obsession for a culture that no longer revolves around facilitating them. I don't think the desire for love and companionship is culturally constructed. The culture says it's important because it is important, not the other way around.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 06:35 PM
1

I agree with the tweet. Car-centric urban planning is probably the biggest factor causing the decline in third places. There's too much inertia involved with getting home after a long day of work that inhibits people from driving out into traffic again to meet up with pre-existing friends they can just chat with online, let alone making new friends. Wouldn't this problem be far worse in a transit oriented world though? My friends are not all going to be centered around the same urban core in a w…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 06:32 PM
2

Dating is supposed to be fun. What about meeting new people is fun? I dislike meeting new people. I dislike the anxiety of being around people I don't know and don't really understand. Dating to me is a hoop I have to jump through in order to get to forming a deeper relationship with someone. That part is something I do want, but I can't say that the path to get there is an enjoyable one.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 05:57 PM
1

Would you only marry a virgin? Do you know how incredibly hard and rare it is to find virgins? I do know... I'm facing an uphill battle when it comes to dating and courtship because I waited so long because I felt I needed to be in a place to be a good husband before I started. I really do feel that I gave a lot for that and I want someone who appreciates that. Yes, it's possible I would marry someone who's not a virgin. But she would have to work a bit harder to prove that that she really does …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 02:47 AM
1

How does the number of partners a woman has had violate or affect you in the slightest? She's lying about something that's very important in order to get me into a relationship. The result is me giving up my virginity under false pretenses to someone who really doesn't respect or care for me and is just trying to use me. If she’s disease free, why does it matter? That's a very big 'if' here. HPV and HSV generally aren't screened for in most STD tests. It matters because it's a sign of commitment…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 12:18 AM
1

I'm equating it to lying about having an STD or even lying about one's identity. And, yes, I'm saying I'd feel deeply violated if someone did that to me. It would be a very deep violation of trust. Are you really saying that this is acceptable behavior?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 12:10 AM
1

Lying is a response to avoiding judgment, vilification, or ostracism. Lying is a response to avoid rejection. Fixed that for ya. In a lot of other cases, this would be considered rape by fraud. I certainly would feel that way if I found someone had lied to me about this.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 07:46 PM
0

Having a slutty year in college 20 years ago doesn't mean they're not worthy of love and it doesn't define a person. The decisions we make don't define us? I purposefully avoided doing that so that I'd be a better husband some day. Someone who 'had a slutty year in college' is showing that they really don't care about marriage of their future spouse. Why would anyone want to be with anyone who views pleasure as a rare commodity that is only OK if shared with them? You could make this exact same …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 07:43 PM
2

It's partially about jealousy In some sense, yes. And it's about control and their own need to feel superior instead of an equal. But not really this. I'm a virgin because I waited and sacrificed on the behalf of my future relationship with my future wife. Why was that relationship worth less to her than it was to me? Because that's what her sleeping around seem to imply.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 07:34 PM
1

Men are not supposed to do all these things just to get access to a vagina, but simply to have good life. Also, because self-improvement is FUN; every pound lifted, every dollar gained, every new social skill unlocked, puts a smile on the face. I'm not sure I can agree with any of that. I'm not into lifting, so I don't really find joy doing that for exercise and I'd prefer to be outdoors doing something instead. I like my job, sure, but I'm not sure I'd keep on beyond making sure the off-boardin…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 07:47 AM
1

I also see a lot of people advising people "take a break" when dating is ruining their mental health. That break might just be a week, or maybe more it doesn't mean people are encouraging them to go into a year-long hermitage. I think it's often read as that. Or even "You're not good enough yet, come back when you are". That's why it's really bad advice. You end up waiting and sacrificing only to find that nobody waited for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 07:44 AM
0

I'd argue that the 'social skills' needed to find a partner and start a relationship are very different than the ones needed to navigate and maintain a relationship. Being good at flirting is something that in an ideal case, is something you really only need once. The kind of folks who are good at the former can be really bad at the latter. Is that really an improvement?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 07:39 AM
1

How you treat others with kindness and being fun and outgoing. These are often, but admittedly not always, in conflict.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 06:33 PM
2

Yes, I could be attracted to an older virgin. In some sense that's exactly what I'd want: Someone who waited for her future husband the way I waited for my future wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/22 03:21 PM
1

What I want doesn't even enter into what's attractive though. The point is that women don't want to put up with men who are outwardly emotional when it comes to emotions that they don't like and thus they desire men who are good at either preventing themselves from feeling something or at least preventing themselves from showing it. That what 'women want men who are emotionally intelligent' seems to mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/22 03:32 AM
1

Anger is often the easiest of emotions for men. There's usually 2-3+ emotions that come before the anger but they happen quickly and many men don't recognize them, so it builds to and manifests as anger. EQ would involve figuring out those emotions and thoughts that came before anger and what triggered the cascade. In other words, this is a technique to avoid showing 'negative emotions'. Which is way to keep your feelings to yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/22 03:20 AM
1

It kinda is. It's knowing that expressing your emotions creates a burden on others and having the control to avoid doing that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/22 09:18 PM
2

No, that's exactly the ask. Emotionally intelligent means keeping your feelings to yourself. It's difficult.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/22 08:34 PM
1

'Emotionally intelligent' != 'emotional'. Indeed, the mark of 'emotionally intelligent' is knowing how to suppress one's own emotions while in the company of others.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/22 08:33 PM
4

Its also been shown having lots of past partners makes you a worse husband Yup. yet men are encouraged to sleep around And this is a awful thing society does. And one of the reasons I think women have it better in this area: They're at least encouraged to behave in a way that aligns with their long term interests. The cultural pressures men face cut against their long term interests.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 01:01 AM
5

I thought your Sexual Market Value was based in objective measures and non-negotiable? This seems to conflict with any realistic understanding of how markets work. All market transactions are on some level a negotiation, since either party can walk away if they don't like the terms. In other words, "It's worth what the market says it's worth". Which makes me worthless in this area of life, but whatever.
/r/ExRedPill17/08/22 12:15 AM
6

Having lots of past partners makes you a worse wife in the future. Sleeping around means taking from one's future marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/22 08:07 PM
0

I do believe if we stop policing women’s sexuality, we naturally would get more women comfortable with having more sex. More sex, with whom? I'd argue that the sexual revolution is a large part of the cause of these men's troubles. Widespread casual sex has helped the kind of folks who want casual sex, sure. But it doesn't solve the problem of wanting to be loved, and it may in fact make that harder.
/r/ExRedPill30/07/22 07:40 AM
3

Part of the issue is that you're primed to notice folks of this sort. It's like you notice all the other folks with the same make/model/configuration of vehicle after you get one. Part of the issue is that Youtube tries to show more stuff like you already watched because if you watched it you must clearly like it, no? And yes, part of it is that dating really is that hard for a lot of guys.
/r/ExRedPill28/07/22 09:36 AM
2

At least consider these men and rather or not they even have a chance to try to find a wife when trying to advocate for changing the social rules around dating and the discourse around it. To quote this great essay So given that real-life nerds are like this, and given that they’re sitting around being terrified that they’re disgusting toxic monsters whose wish to have sex is an offense against womankind, what do you think happens when they hear from every news source in the world that they are …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 03:13 AM
10

The problem with this is that there's very little correlation between moral character and attractiveness. Indeed, there may be a negative correlation.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:56 AM
1

Yes, and? You'd still object to having a social norm that all gay people must live a celibate life, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:50 AM
1

Well... Yeah? Maybe not always and everywhere, but I do think that it's fair to say that most homophobia comes with disgust at the idea of gay sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/22 06:53 PM
1

How would anyone know if you're gay if you're not having sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/22 04:00 PM
4

homophobia If one lived a celibate life, why would it matter rather or not they're gay or straight? By your argument, why is homophobia even a category for concern when it can be avoided by the exact same behavior that where your answer is "well, ya'll just got suck it up and admit that rather or not you ever have a wife and family just isn't that important"?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/22 07:29 AM
2

But isn't this a Catch-22 on some level? Isn't making an effort to be or appear less 'desperate' itself 'unauthentic' under your framing?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 09:37 PM
3

In order to be successful at dating you do have to match with someone. Given that the default for most men is 0 interest from the opposite sex, can they really be blamed with wanting to get more female interest?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 07:52 PM
–

What exactly is 'inauthentic' here? Is it inauthentic to apply anything from the rational, problem solving part of one's brain towards finding a wife and being a good husband? Is doing something that feels unnatural because it makes someone else happy 'inauthentic'? I'm always bothered by this claim that trying systematize dating is somehow dehumanizing and hurtful. What else am I supposed to do here? Because clearly 'just act naturally' isn't working for me and so many others. If we are truly s…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 07:19 AM
1

40% of couples that meet these days say they met online. No, that's not all online dating, but some of it is. There's a point where 'yes it is real life', even if any given user is only seeing a soda straw version of whatever site they're using.
/r/ExRedPill28/06/22 08:33 PM
0

What do you mean by 'objectification' here? When someone has a problem in their life, should they not try to come up with a system to solve it? Should they not break it down into whatever chunks they can do? Is this just an obnoxious way of saying "How dare you systematize human relationships "? What’s the fundamental reason why you want to find a wife? Because I want to be loved. Because I want someone to care about me, and I'm willing to give the same. Because I want a lifelong friend. And, ye…
/r/ExRedPill21/06/22 07:04 PM
1

Don't forget his arguments about human society having compulsory monogamy... Isn't this very contrary to the 'Red Pill' crowd's promotion of promiscuity among young men?
/r/ExRedPill20/06/22 08:33 PM
3

No, Jordan Peterson is a Conservative. There's a pretty deep conflict between conservatives and the Red Pill crowd: The Red Pill crowd sees sex, particularly casual sex, as a legitimate end in and of itself. Conservatives see sex as part of married relationship.
/r/ExRedPill20/06/22 07:02 PM
3

Even if 'hooking up' was easy, I'm not sure I'd be interested because I fear that having such a history would make me a worse husband to the woman I eventually marry. In other words, this is a sacrifice I make today for the sake of my future wife and our relationship together.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/22 01:25 PM
1

Go back, read my two comments, and quote where I ever called you a “virgin neck beard” or attacked your life choice. Right here: And obviously your individual, anecdotal situation is comparable to the situations that most men and most women find themselves in, right? Wow, you’re so smart. We’re all so impressed. Can you just imagine your response if I flipped the script here? If some woman talks about how her spending her 20s sleeping around was good for her marriage and I had given that respons…
/r/ExRedPill19/06/22 08:33 AM
0

It's the double standard that gets me: You folks cry 'slut shaming' at the first hint that anyone might disapprove of someone's decision to sleep around, only to turn around play the whole 'virgin neckbeard looser'. Y'all can dish it out, but can't take it. If I were to write the same comment about a group you approve of you'd condemn it and you know it.
/r/ExRedPill19/06/22 07:09 AM
1

Where are these places where there are lots of single women and it's considered appropriate to talk to strangers?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/22 11:48 PM
3

It’s generally safer for men to walk the streets, The relative rates of the victimization by violent crime would question that. men generally make more money for the same work, Simply not true. many esteemed industries are male dominated and women/POC generally need to work harder to achieve the same levels of success and wealth as men. Most male dominated industries go out of their way to give special advantages to women who seek to work in them in the name of 'diversity'. This can and often do…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/22 06:53 PM
-6

Divorces select for folks who are not good partners. A divorce isn't always one person's fault, but one who is divorced is more likely to be the kind of person who causes a divorce than one who is not.
/r/ExRedPill18/06/22 07:25 AM
1

Having an abundance of possible suitors allows greater choice among those suitors for traits that one does want than the alternative of not having an abundance of possible suitors.
/r/ExRedPill18/06/22 02:18 AM
-6

Why does it matter? Why do you need to know this? How does this question help you find compatibility and happiness and honesty and love? It doesn't. If you're a young person weighing the options of "Should I wait a bit longer and hope I'm more attractive later or start looking for a wife now even though I'm not completely ready?" it matters quite a bit. I made the wrong call then, and now most of the best possible partners are 'off the market' now. Now I'm facing a dating pool that's shrinking e…
/r/ExRedPill18/06/22 12:45 AM
1

Amazing how the sex pozzies preach tolerance and acceptance, until they realize that means accepting the 'waiting for marriage' crowd.
/r/ExRedPill17/06/22 08:56 PM
-7

Seems to me that slut shaming is largely projection! I've been saving myself for marriage (or at least the one I hope to marry) to the point of turning down women who are far too sexual too soon. So... Really?
/r/ExRedPill17/06/22 06:55 AM
3

The issue is that the kind of social skills needed to communicate politely and professionally in general settings don't really translate into being a good flirt. And the kind of social skills that translate into being good at flirting with strangers don't make one a good husband. Not all social skills are the same thing and not all are transferable. There's a good version of 'treat women like people': "Respect their individual rights". There's also a version that says "How dare you try to system…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 09:05 AM
3

Counter: The kind of social skills around flirting and meeting new people are utterly unrelated to the kind of social skills that make someone a good friend or husband. Being bad at flirting doesn't make one untrustworthy, indeed I'd argue that it's the opposite.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 08:19 PM
25

I don't think people desire relationships because they're programmed to do so by media: I think that desire is something we're born with.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 08:46 AM
3

I suppose the argument shouldn't be "personality doesn't matter" but "personality is every bit as immutable as appearance".
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/22 02:07 AM
1

It’s not about the cheating, though. I'm saying it should be. One shouldn't be able to profit from infidelity or abandonment. That should be the case regardless of one's ability to support ones self or if they were the stay-at-home spouse during the marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 05:29 PM
0

But only 10% of divorces result in alimony, it’s not the norm. Plus you don’t have to agree to situations that would result in alimony if you don’t want that risk, it’s not hard to prevent. The idea of someone profiting after cheating on you or abusing you and your children is awful even if it's rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:36 AM
31

You get fat, you pay. Eh... Is that part of the vows and the contract? Or wasn't part of the deal knowing that you'll age along side your partner and dealing with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:35 AM
1

Men complain about having to pay for dates while ignoring the fact that the woman has almost always had to spend even more money and effort to get her appearance ready for that date (clothes, make-up, gym fees, the soul-crushing nature of dieting, etc.) than he will remotely spend for drinks, dinner, and entertainment. You forget that men have to work long hours and have good career to even be on the starting line when it comes to dating. If clothes and makeup count, so does ordinary labor in th…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 07:19 AM
1

There are ways of knowing that don't require having sex with someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 03:33 AM
1

What can be more meaningful for the average person than family?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 12:30 PM
3

To quote a far better analysis than I could make When your position commits you to saying “Love isn’t important to humans and we should demand people stop caring about whether or not they have it,” you need to take a really careful look in the mirror – assuming you even show up in one.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 12:25 PM
1

It's because the patriarchal system made it so that any woman that asked the man was considered a slut. Most folks really do know the difference between a date and hookup, no? so let's educate men to not fear rejection. Man's desire for love and companionship isn't socially constructed and can't simply be trained out. men are expected to be providers because of the patriarchy. Men, have to realize they are individual humans, hence, unless (as it has happened with women throughout history) men ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 12:16 PM
8

I think you're addressing a very much weakened version. Yes, women can be your friends and there is value in that. But that's not really all that much help in dating and courtship.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/22 09:58 AM
2

Toxic masculinity is a man who shoots himself in the head with a shotgun because he’s so afraid of asking for help and/or admitting failure. The same tendency pushes men to get up and go to work so that they can be a good provider for those around them. The same desire to be strong allows many men to tackle difficult challenges and overcome great hardships. Toxic masculinity is men in the hood fathering 10 kids by 11 women to prove he’s a “man.” And the same desire often leads to a man marrying …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 04:36 PM
1

So was Reagan.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 04:15 PM
2

It's a massive investment for maybe someday. Particularly when you're making all the effort and not really getting results.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/22 09:24 AM
2

yeah, unwanted advances, that's not going up to a woman and saying hello like a normal person. But how would one know that someone wants someone to come up to them and greet them?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/22 09:21 AM
1

I’m the opposite. I love interviewing. Love the social aspect of it. I think it’s great. Eh... There's some enjoyment to be had talking about the state of the industry and comparing cultures/tech stacks/etc between companies sure. But that's a relatively small part of the interview process. The rest is you being evaluated... Sometimes based on you actively solving problems (which would be alright if not for the pressure of the interview) and sometimes based on a more nebulous 'behavioral' questi…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 10:17 PM
2

Compared to many times in your life have re-partnered? Currently a big fat zero. I hate interviewing, but hopping jobs every once in a while is a fact of life in my field.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/22 10:30 PM
1

No, but I'm in a different place than most: I've got quite a bit of savings as it is, the whole reason I have a career is because I want a wife someday and my field does allow for remote work.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/22 10:29 PM
2

You don't need to be in a major city to have a university and a home town symphony.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/22 09:54 AM
1

You can't point to anything wrong with their analysts, you just don't like their conservative viewpoints. Got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 08:32 PM
1

Do you have a specific bias you're alleging in the data or analysis, or are you just saying that "they're conservative, therefore they must be wrong somehow"?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 07:37 PM
1

That's what the data shows.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 06:57 PM
1

Less divorces don't imply happy marriages. And sometimes, you can't even judge your happiness, becay your field of view is very constrained. But have separate data for both and you can reach the conclusion that folks do in fact have better marriages. Especially as a virgin. She might think she's happy, but can't really know since she didn't explore life. "You think you're happy, but you're really not."? How exactly does this work? Sorry, when it comes down to it, one's satisfaction is defined by…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 06:56 PM
2

Except, those who marry as virgins tend to have less divorce and happier marriages.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 09:36 AM
–

I guess... I'm just surprised to see 'excitement' to be rated even that highly, particularly when it's so opposed to comfort and stability in my mind. I can get rather being single than being cheated on or abused, but it's just so odd to prefer to be single than to be bored.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/21 10:02 PM
–

But still is a correlation here, no? That's the point of this question: To force you into this tradeoff.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/21 06:46 PM
–

Nobody wants a man who is boring either, but boring is not synonymous with faithful. I'd argue that it is. A 'boring' man places a lower priority on seeking new experiences such as new sex partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/21 06:21 PM
1

How many millions are we talking here?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/21 04:33 AM
6

When was the last time you heard about a man being acquitted after admitting to killing his sleeping wife on the grounds of 'self defense'? Because women often get away with such killings.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/21 07:25 PM
1

Decreased Risk of Divorce People who wait till marriage tend to be deeply religious and most religions prohibit/look down at divorces. It's also a correlation and not causation. If you want to have the best chances statistically, you shouldn't marry too early (and that's what a lot of people waiting till marriage actually do), you should get education, get a job and date people with higher education and a job as well. Also neither of you should have financial issues. Both of you shouldn't be fro…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/21 10:06 PM
2

So, this is effectively the exact same thing as the "Blue Pill" advice of "Don't worry, everything will work itself out and you'll find love when you least expect it" except being more explicit about how young and hot the partner is... And is similarly terrible advice for young men.
/r/ExRedPill23/10/21 11:22 AM
-4

What's true is true, regardless if it's useful or not. Depending on what you're labeling as 'misogynistic', some of it may be true. Or it may not. Rather or not someone objects to it doesn't have that much baring as to rather or not it it's true.
/r/ExRedPill23/10/21 02:38 AM
1

Ironically, more often than not it also solves any women problem too Sadly, I can't confirm. I've made big-tech salaries with basically zero living expenses. That kind of money buys security, but in the kind of places where one earns big-tech salaries like that the cost of living makes it hard to justify moving out of my family's home. Sure, it's fun being able to plug numbers into a FIRE calculator and come up with a retirement date in my early 40s. But it's not really all that helpful in terms…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/21 08:08 PM
4

I never really quite got this... For me love and even attraction is a choice. A fleeting feeling isn't something to build a lasting relationship on. Folks have to keep making the choice to care about their partners.
/r/ExRedPill07/10/21 03:27 AM
24

"We're out of Greek letters, whatever will we do" *Sees Google autocomplete "yogurt" after typing "greek"* "Ah, there we go!"
/r/ExRedPill16/09/21 09:58 AM
3

Are these folks really good partners then?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/21 01:28 PM
2

A woman reading that would ask the same question that a man does on the other side: "What am I supposed to do while I'm dutifully waiting to be a good spouse then?". Going out of your way to date people out of some sense of sexual excitement but no thought of tomorrow isn't compatible with being a good spouse later in life.
/r/ExRedPill08/08/21 11:40 AM
2

The other girl is interested in you too, she’s exactly the sexy kind of girl you want, but she’s not interested in anything but sex and in fact you don’t have anything in common with her. Would you hang out with the first (maybe even go out on a few dates because heck, she’s interested, let’s see where this goes) and have sex with the second? Of course you would. Um... No, I wouldn't.
/r/ExRedPill08/08/21 11:28 AM
2

I don't think most people contest any of this. It's a "blue pill" idea (aka common sense) that more promiscuous people are more likely to commit infidelity. All the people who tell me how I'm a terrible person for wanting to marry a virgin that I seem to run into would disagree... It's unclear exactly what drives more promiscuous people to commit infidelity: If it's the promiscuity per se or if there are mediating variables/confounds at play; If you're looking for a wife or husband, does this ma…
/r/ExRedPill03/08/21 08:02 PM
1

I could say the same about trade, and investment and all the mechanisms of capitalism and markets too.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/21 06:33 AM
1

Nobody is dismissing male victims of sexual assault here, that's a boogeyman you created in your own mind. As a victim of several sexual assaults, I have full sympathy for everybody, of all genders and sexual identities, who had to deal with sexual assault, and I know only too well how difficult it is to get help for the trauma it causes, let alone legal justice. You're the one claiming that women sexually assaulting men is a non-issue. Why else would you even bring up 'it's predominantly perpet…
/r/ExRedPill21/07/21 11:50 PM
1

I'm quite baffled why you would think it is somehow scandalous that these researchers are distinguishing between forced and coerced penetration (which surely is a legal distinction). Do you think women's statistics are not vastly skewed by this difference? First off, it turns out they're not. Approximately 1.2% of female respondents said they were 'made to penetrate' at some point in their lives. Compare that to 7.1% of male respondents. Secondly, the definitions are still not what you think the…
/r/ExRedPill21/07/21 06:10 PM
2

People will not take you seriously if you told them you got raped by a woman, and it'll just be shameful. Some of those people are the ones who define rape for the CDC when they're building the measures of these things.
/r/ExRedPill21/07/21 07:28 AM
-2

Follow your sources through. They cite this paper, which references the NISVS. The NISVS specifically puts a woman forcing herself on a man or a woman drugging a man to the point he cannot resist then having sex with him in a category that is not rape. The specific types of sexual violence assessed included rape (completed or attempted forced penetration or alcohol- or drug-facilitated penetration) and sexual violence other than rape, including being made to penetrate a perpetrator, sexual coerc…
/r/ExRedPill21/07/21 06:30 AM
-4

No, most of the time it's perpetrated by women. Unless your phrase your definition of rape to exclude any situation by which a woman would get a man to have sex with her against his will.
/r/ExRedPill21/07/21 02:09 AM
1

I think the gap between the traits that make someone a 'good husband' and a 'good boyfriend' is quite a bit bigger than the gap between the traits that make someone a 'good wife' and a 'good girlfriend'. Monogamy means you have to compromise these. Promiscuity gives the promise of having ones cake and eating it too, only to come at a cost to one's ability to be a good spouse.
/r/ExRedPill19/07/21 08:45 AM
7

Yeah, all models are wrong but some are useful, sure. But anecdotes do lead to a certain confirmation bias, no?
/r/ExRedPill17/07/21 04:51 AM
20

All too often folks go down this road of trying condemn any effort at systematizing relationships. In my mind, finding a partner is a problem like any other. There's nothing wrong with trying to break it down and go about it analytically. The problem with red-pill isn't that it's analytical, it's that its frequently wrong in its analysis.
/r/ExRedPill16/07/21 07:27 PM
3

A woman who approached you and initiated dates with you BUT, does not initiate anything sexual and actively refuses your sexual advances. Pretend she is waiting until marriage in this case and refuses to do anything beyond holding your hand. She otherwise behaves very enthusiastically to be with you and even pays for dates... But sex is off the table until marriage. I see this as an absolute win.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/21 06:16 PM
2

There's lots of areas where there's a conflict. Due process for those accused of sexual misconduct. Child custody. Alimony. Male victims of female attackers in a sexual assault or domestic violence context. Gender roles in dating and courtship. And so on.
/r/ExRedPill15/07/21 05:02 AM
-6

/r/menslib cares more about supporting feminism than helping men.
/r/ExRedPill14/07/21 05:48 PM
2

But you also have to consider that in the light of other stats that show that most divorces have nothing to do with infidelity or abuse.
/r/ExRedPill14/07/21 01:33 AM
3

How many partners do women typically have once they do start having sex? Well, let’s just say it’s a lot fewer than ten guys a week. Indeed, most women aged 25-44 years have had less than half this number of total partners OVER THE COURSE OF THEIR WHOLE ADULT LIVES. 4.2 partners, to be exact, a bit fewer than the number of female partners (6.1) Am I the only one who still thinks that's a lot? Particularly when I spent my 20s 'waiting for marriage'?
/r/ExRedPill07/07/21 08:00 AM
0

You mean, nobody has ever held the door for you? Ever asked you out on a date and payed for your meal? Nobody has ever been friendly to you in public? Given you a seat on the bus or public transit? And that's before we get into the 'women and children first' survival situations where men act as human shields from terrorist bullets and the like. Or before we start talking about how domestic abuse is treated differently depending on the sex of the perpetrator. Or bias in family court. Or bias in p…
/r/ExRedPill29/06/21 02:29 AM
-19

But... Is it wrong?
/r/ExRedPill28/06/21 07:07 PM
1

I really don't mind waiting until the wedding night... If the woman I'm marrying has done the same. In fact, I'd kindof prefer that, because in my mind it shows commitment to the marriage. It doesn't mean I don't have sexual desire earlier: I do. I'm willing to sacrifice that in the name of being a good husband later.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/21 10:28 AM
1

Define a 'good income' in this context. I'm rather frugal myself. I don't mind supporting a wife, indeed it's part of the reason I'm still working. But I want someone who respects that and doesn't abuse it. I'm not going to fund stupid social status games. The point of money is security, not lording over others with a flashy lifestyle.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/21 05:53 PM
1

You forgot veterinarians. Yeah, but HR bureaucrats are in fact quite unimportant to maintaining civilization.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/21 09:28 PM
-2

Your point seems?? to be that any indicator of romantic interest is sexual harassment. My point is there are a lot of people who have a lot of cultural power promoting such a message. My point is that this is really hard to overcome as a man. It often turns into vilifying your every romantic desire. There are plenty of ways to interact with people you're interested in romantically without making them feel uncomfortable. Like what? Be specific. Because as soon as you do, I'm sure I can find a cou…
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 11:45 PM
-3

How do you define sexual harassment? If it's so broad so as to include any indicator of romantic interest, then, yes he probably did "sexually harass" her. Only difference is that she apparently liked him and welcomed this "harassment". The problem is that nobody knows what the response is going to be before they ask. This is why it's phrased as asking someone out. You're not going to know the answer unless you ask. If you're imposing rules for dating and courtship, there has to be a way for fol…
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 11:34 PM
0

If someone was showing genuine signs of affection, not harassment, they would understand that they should fuck off if their advances aren't wanted. But how would anyone know that their advances aren't wanted before they do them? Hell, how do you tell if they're not wanted after you do them? So much of the advice in this category turns into "look for 'soft noes'" that are so broadly defined that even the most enthusiastic 'yes' gets turned into a 'no' in your mind. Is there any relationship that …
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 11:32 PM
-1

I don't think you can have the kind of emotionally fulfilling romance without just a bit of the same kind of lust that motivates harassment. This isn't to say we can't have one without the other: By all means one should shame and condemn genuinely harassing and ungentlemanly behavior. But it does mean that the focus should be on harassment, not on desire. All too often this does turn into vilification of desire, where the exact same behavior is condemned if it's motivated by such desire. And, ye…
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 09:50 PM
0

Are you telling me that you have never, not even once, had a feasible option ask you out? That you've never had a relationship that started because he took the first step?
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 09:11 PM
-2

Then certainly the feeling of being desired, of having many suitors to choose from has its advantages, no?
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 08:47 PM
-6

Is there any expression of desire you don't consider to be harassment?
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 08:38 PM
1

What are 'alpha' and 'beta' in this context anyways? I've found the terms to be so widely defined as to not be all that enlightening one way or another most of the times they're used.
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 08:30 PM
-9

Women get to be loved by default. Men must prove them selves worthy. Women get to be wooed instead of doing the wooing.
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 08:26 PM
0

Be a woman. Be told your gender role is to find ONE man and the more men you date the more strikes against you. Be told that your position as a woman is to always submit and be degraded whenever you have sex. Be told that having sex with men is an admission of having "no self respect". There's a huge difference between dating someone and having sex with them long before you even think about having the marriage talk with them. As a man, I'm told that sleeping around is taking something from my fu…
/r/ExRedPill06/06/21 06:09 PM
1

To suggest that that guy be taught to high school students whose brains haven't fully developed is dangerous, not just for themselves, but for those around them. I know I shouldn't do this... But... Do you say the same thing about the 1619 project's claim that the US war of independence was intended to preserve slavery? I get that Peterson's more recent works are not... All that academically worthwhile for high school students. But dangerous? Where's the danger here? Wouldn't danger require real…
/r/ExRedPill29/05/21 03:22 AM
1

I know this is an old post, but I'm going to engage it on its own terms. Just look at his daughter and him banking on this and pushing an all meat diet that could have dangerous consequences plus the fact that they are not medical professionals here (We're in Hell covers this diet issue in detail). They're making money off of vulnerable people. I don't think Jordan Peterson himself specifically recommends his diet for others. His claim is much narrower than you what you say it is: https://twitte…
/r/ExRedPill29/05/21 03:21 AM
2

I'm simply asking you to define your terms here. From where I'm sitting, it looks like you're playing the motte and bailey game. 'Redpill' is bad because some idiots go off all manor ungentmanly and sometimes downright abusive behavior directed at women is a-okay. Sure, I agree that's bad. Some of the folks who hold those views also hold other views that align with conservatism and traditionalism when it comes to dating and courtship. Also, a lot of other folks who decidedly don't defend bad beh…
/r/ExRedPill29/05/21 01:18 AM
2

What does Peterson specifically say that is "red pill"?
/r/ExRedPill28/05/21 11:42 PM
0

And what he says is quite different than the usual things redpill is criticized for. If Jordan Peterson is red pill, then so is all of conservatism and the term means something very different than most readers would expect it to mean.
/r/ExRedPill28/05/21 07:13 PM
1

He says that people get fat and stupid on too many carbs and the way to be healthy is by cutting out carbs and vegetables out of one's diet He... does? Jordan Peterson doesn't recommend the all beef diet he eats (or ate). It's something that he's found works for him, but probably isn't broadly applicable.
/r/ExRedPill28/05/21 07:12 PM
1

It's the power of life itself; do they really think they can treat it cavalierly and get away unscathed? I ask the same thing of the sex positive feminists all the time.
/r/ExRedPill07/05/21 09:24 AM
0

Not in any reliable sense they are not.
/r/ExRedPill07/05/21 09:22 AM
1

Running the risk of making people uncomfortable is necessary if you want to find a wife. And, yeah, if you're a man it's your responsibility to 'put yourself out there' and make the approach. There are women who will be offended by you doing that no matter how you go about it. I don't think you're responsible for appeasing them. They don't owe you anything, but you also don't owe them your silence.
/r/ExRedPill13/04/21 04:33 PM
1

There are autistic men who date, feminists don't sit around writing articles about rejecting men based on them being autistic, please provide examples of this because I have never seen it. Oh, you don't remember the trends about 'Nice Guys', about how any unwanted attention is harassment and the like? The great amount of work that the word 'creepy' and the vocal denunciations thereof puts into erasing the distinction between 'awkward and unattractive' and 'predatory'? You don't remember stuff li…
/r/ExRedPill13/04/21 08:46 AM
8

I think you have your cause and effect backwards... Folks who are happy with their relationships don't bother to seek out something like 'Red Pill' advice on the matter in the first place.
/r/ExRedPill29/03/21 01:48 AM
5

Pinned post: Men don’t care about their children. Most don’t want to actively abuse them but they plain don’t care. They ask for kids to anchor themselves to you and to anchor you down. The only time the do care is during a divorce. And that’s as a tool to hurt and/or control you.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/21 03:26 AM
1

This isn't necessarily a contradiction: Women are too picky about [traits that have nothing to do with being a good husband] but are also not picky enough about [traits that have everything to do with being a good husband].
/r/ExRedPill20/03/21 07:19 PM
4

A combination of word games with the definition of 'alpha' and 'beta' along with a healthy dose of confirmation bias. We can all remember the status jockeying "AMOG" and the 'don't rock the boat' "beta", but once armed with these vague terms it's quite easy to miss out on all the folks who's personalities don't fit either category or how many variation of personality get classified as "alpha" or "beta" (or maybe even both) depending on the circumstance.
/r/ExRedPill12/03/21 09:27 AM
-1

You're begging the question: Is the belief that men are inherently superior to women a core manosphere belief? I don't believe it is.
/r/ExRedPill02/03/21 12:07 AM
5

I think this boils down to "The enemy of my enemy is my friend." The Red Pill and broader Manosphere folks are the enemy of misadratic woke leftists. So are the neo-Nazi folks. I can see the temptation, much as social democrats are willing to tolerate bigotry and racism in the name of bolstering their appeal to the woke crowd. The answer to this is that just as "Liberals get the bullet too", "Conservatives get the bullet too". The deal with the devil always has its costs. In this case they're no…
/r/ExRedPill01/03/21 10:06 PM
3

Sure... What exactly would that imply? Should I behave dishonorably towards others because they feel politically free to treat me badly? Why should I surrender my morals and ethics?
/r/ExRedPill27/02/21 09:26 PM
1

Exactly how does a higher body count cause divorce? I'd argue that it teaches people to regard their partners as disposable and replaceable. Ultimately, it really doesn't matter which direction the causation arrow goes. The differences in the odds of staying married are still present either way. You're still going to have better odds having fewer past partners and choosing someone else who has had fewer past partners either way.
/r/ExRedPill12/02/21 12:18 PM
1

But body count reflects on character. One's past behavior is probably the best criteria judge to one's character by.
/r/ExRedPill12/02/21 11:32 AM
1

I can't speak for TRP, but I can speak for myself. I spent my life thinking that "True love waits". That part of showing your commitment to someone is saving yourself for them. Therefore, I view someone having a past as making a judgement call: Having that bit of 'fun' then and there was more important to them then having a good marriage later. I don't want to marry someone who thinks like that. Yes, you're right to point out the hypocrisy and double standards. Here's the thing: Not everyone who…
/r/ExRedPill12/02/21 09:47 AM
3

There is no singular game here. There is no conspiracy of the 'people in power' because there's a great diversity among those people. Rich people are no hive mind and there's really not any money to be made off of division either. Division leads to a lack of stability and confidence. A lack of stability and confidence make building anything, be it a family, a business, an investment portfolio or a piece of physical plant or infrastructure. These may still be artificial tribal politics. That's be…
/r/ExRedPill01/02/21 04:06 AM
3

So how long before we get "a man professing his love for a woman is totally gaaaaaayyyyy..."?
/r/ExRedPill06/01/21 02:26 AM
1

You simply lack the reading comprehension skills to understand the data, because both the graphs and the original source are in no way related. Previously you said that you didn't think they faked the data and just made it up, but that the graphs were still invalid because of reasons that you were unable to articulate. Now you're saying that they did fake the data? You provided no such link.. Yes, I did. Here it is again: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nsfg/NSFG_2015-2017_UG_App1a_FileIndex_FemRe…
/r/ExRedPill29/12/20 08:22 PM
1

I just went through this document and it's still not related to the graphs in the original post that were found on the RP blogs. The numbers aren't even the same and the information is irrelevant to the graphs. The original graphs are citing number of sexual partners prior to and percentage of marriages that have ended in divorce. The NSFG guide mentions columns for number of sexual partners prior to marriage and current marital status (along with date of marriage if they're married or formerly …
/r/ExRedPill29/12/20 07:48 PM
0

I just went through all of the NSFG's archived files going back to 1973 and could not find any numbers that have to do with sexual partners and divorce and marriage stability. The NSFG publishes these guides to the use of their data. On Page 11 of that document there are a number of fields about past sexual partners. On page 42 and 43 we have a number of fields about marriage and divorce. Given a table of data in this format (which I believe one can download here, for the 2015-2017 ) one can ver…
/r/ExRedPill29/12/20 05:57 PM
0

What exactly is misleading about those charts? Where's the misrepresentation?
/r/ExRedPill29/12/20 09:55 AM
0

You still haven't answered the question. How is the data in question cherry picked? How is it being misrepresented? What interpretation or analysis do you have that suggests that virgins are at a higher risk of divorce instead of a lower risk of divorce?
/r/ExRedPill29/12/20 07:03 AM
1

Okay, if they haven't fabricated the data, then how are they deliberately misconstruing the data then? What's specifically wrong with their analysis? Your entire argument seems to be that they're not credible because they're not credible. If they're wrong, you should be able to form an argument based on how they're arguing, not based on who they are. There are more credible sources out there than some random on the internet who chooses to defend redpill idiots. Are there? Can you cite any who ha…
/r/ExRedPill29/12/20 12:12 AM
2

The 'original source' in the case we're talking about didn't do this analysis. And, yes, the NSFG isn't just made up data. If I make the same analysis and the same graphs and they turn out the same and I publish how I did it, wouldn't that convince you that they didn't fabricate their data? If not, why not? Isn't that the core of your entire allegation here?
/r/ExRedPill28/12/20 11:16 PM
1

Look, if I recreate the graph with something like PyChart from the raw data (with a link that allows one to download and reproduce it themselves) and provide source code would you be happy? Or would you come up with some reason why that doesn't count like "Oh, I reverse image searched it and it's clear they made the graph themselves even though it reflects data from a well known sociological survey..."?
/r/ExRedPill28/12/20 10:10 PM
2

Now, you're just being lazy. See this post. It cites Kahn and London. Joan R. Kahn, Kathryn A. London, 'Premarital Sex and the Risk of Divorce', Journal of Marriage and the Family 53 (1991): 845-855. See this post, which cites the National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG) data.
/r/ExRedPill28/12/20 05:29 PM
2

But here's the thing: I am a virgin myself. Are you really saying that I'd be better off having slept around? With a partner who slept around? Because none of the data you presented really seems to support that. Attraction doesn't care about statistics. Attraction is not all that's needed to make a marriage work.
/r/ExRedPill28/12/20 05:22 AM
3

But they do cite the sources from where they draw their data. If you're so inclined, you can look up their cited papers and confirm or refute the data presented in the graphs, or make your own.
/r/ExRedPill28/12/20 05:05 AM
1

And it's just as easy to get suckered into the trap of "Maybe someday I'll be good enough" while women are quite willing to date and marry folks who aren't 'good enough' right now, leaving not very many suitable folks left by the time you think you've done enough 'self improvement' to start dating.
/r/ExRedPill28/12/20 03:54 AM
1

That may be so, however, if the job/relationship was the right fit, you ideally would not be bored. I don't think I agree with that. Jobs and relationships are not always endlessly entertaining. That's not a reasonable or mature thing to ask of them.
/r/ExRedPill28/12/20 02:43 AM
0

It seems like just the other day we had a highly upvoted thread about how rather or not men are able to find success in dating and courtship shouldn't even be a concern of feminism. Now you're saying that the feminists genuinely care and are willing to push to reshape society in ways that have a positive impact on that area in life, perhaps even in ways that compromise women's privileged position in courtship and dating? Sure, feminism is no hivemind, but I can't help but wonder how much of an i…
/r/ExRedPill27/12/20 08:27 AM
9

To take the much-needed advice of some of my mentors: I was going to take a short break from dating to focus on myself, and when I did return to the dating world, I was going to be significantly more selective in who I chose to spend my time with. I think this is very much an over applied talking point at best. And a gawdawful one at worst. Why? Because I spent my whole life waiting and trying to prepare myself for this. And I'm worse off for having done that.
/r/ExRedPill26/12/20 11:08 PM
1

False accusations of sexual assault? Dude nobody in their right mind is okay with it. Feminists are against false accusations because it makes it more difficult for actual victims to get help. Most feminists I see are actively opposed to due process protections for the accused. Sure, they may not like false accusations, but they're trade off a lot of innocent people getting hurt when they happen. And that's before we talk about feminists' minimize sexual violence perpetrated by women when the vi…
/r/ExRedPill24/12/20 08:22 PM
1

Short answer: It does.
/r/ExRedPill24/12/20 05:29 AM
2

If anything high body count (in either partner) could reduce ability to pair bond because you’re willing to walk away so quickly. Yes, and? If you're looking for commitment, you'd be right to be wary of someone with that kind of background. That doesn’t necessarily mean your bonding ability to commit is impaired. Being willing to leave out of boredom is a pretty big sign that yes, you're not as willing to commit.
/r/ExRedPill24/12/20 05:07 AM
1

I have asked out guys before myself. I keep it straightforward. "Hey, do you want to go get some coffee or a drink sometime?" Super simple. Zero pressure to flirt and have it sound right. So, have you ever had such expressions of interest mistaken for platonic interest? Or have you ever done the mistaking yourself? You might be violating the rule #2 here, but it's different for women since women are not seen as predatory or threatening when they make romantic advances towards men.
/r/ExRedPill24/12/20 04:45 AM
2

If you can't even define your terms, how are supposed to have a discussion? If you can't define your terms, what's the point of even giving that as "advice"? Maybe it's not intended as 'advice', but as gotya. As a way of insulting the listener, as if the only way he'd be struggling with dating and courtship to begin with is because he's a bad person. Because if you were a good person you wouldn't have to think about it, it would all come naturally.
/r/ExRedPill24/12/20 04:28 AM
4

If you’re a man or woman who desires attractive virgins or low n, are you doing your part to attract those people? Yes. I'm a virgin myself, at least in part by choice. I've made it a point to try put myself in a position to be a good provider. Are you yourself attractive? I dunno. Are you conservative / religious? Ideologically and socially conservative, yes. Religious, no. Are you/were you looking for your wife/husband at a young or teen age? Yes, I was. Or at least I wanted to. To me, the who…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/20 10:19 PM
1

Is there any place where someone would want to be approached by some sleazy salesman? Is that what dating and courtship is to women? Am I really that worthless? If I apply the golden rule here, I get a very different result: A conservation with a stranger in grocery store or the like is something I wouldn't mind in the slightest. Even if they ultimately did have some sort of romantic intention that I didn't share.
/r/ExRedPill23/12/20 08:12 PM
1

The problem is that a lot of people, even folks who are virgins and proud of it, would take offense at just asking.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/20 07:12 PM
1

If you're a chaste young man looking for a wife or a chaste young woman looking for a husband, I'm not sure that the direction of causation matters. Either way, having multiple previous partners is sign that they're not going to think about sex the same way you will and that they're not going to take the relationship as seriously as you would.
/r/ExRedPill23/12/20 05:59 PM
1

And then I end up waiting forever and never finding a wife at all. Maybe that's exactly the outcome you want? I'm out of time. Most women who share my values found their husbands a full decade ago. Every day wait I face longer odds.
/r/ExRedPill23/12/20 05:28 PM
2

Ummmm... Yes? I'm struggling to unlearn that, but I do think that's accurate. I'm not sure how you're coming up with a distinction between "straightforward about your interest in someone" and "hitting on someone". Aren't those synonyms?
/r/ExRedPill23/12/20 08:42 AM
-9

I think you're missing the forest for the trees. Yes, the "oxytocin == pair bonding" bit is wildly oversimplified and overstated. Or perhaps just plain wrong. But we also see that folks who have more partners tend to be less willing or less able to form a lifelong commitment. They also tend to be less happy in their marriages. Ultimately, us humans are a bit more than ball of neurotransmitters. The emotions are quite different even if oxytocin increases under all those circumstances.
/r/ExRedPill23/12/20 03:00 AM
1

Have you ever heard about women who beg their boyfriends/husbands to open up to them then recoil in disgust when they actually do?
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 11:22 PM
5

Also, I might add.. What exactly defines a place where people are open to meeting new people? All I hear is circular definitions here. And even when specific examples are given, there's usually a proviso to not try to make any sort of romantic advances because "women are involved in this organization/activity to do the activity, not meet men". It's okay to talk, just so long as you're so pure of heart that you've completely suppressed any desire you may have for a relationship.
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 09:31 PM
0

So, how do I know if "hi, how are you" is a shitty and gross message? I'm told all sorts of things are seen as annoying or threatening to women that I wouldn't even have a second thought about. The kind of 'read the tea leaves' advice that's presented as a moral imperative that requires me to read minds means I can never be sure if what I'm doing is welcome and I can't be sure if a friendly greeting is welcome I have no business sending it.
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 09:14 PM
0

You're right, but unlearning these messages is easier said than done.
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 08:51 PM
-1

I've got examples... Does that not count? I do recall reading some others, but I'd have to work at finding them.
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 08:24 PM
1

Oh, bull fucking shit. Every culture has had slavery in their past. To this very day African Muslims engage in 'Female Genital Mutilation'. Sex-selective abortions don't happen nearly as frequently in the West as they do in the East. There have been cultures around the world who have engaged mass rape as part of how they wage war and conquest. Don't assume that universal human failings only belong to the white man.
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 06:22 PM
1

Even there, we get the message of "Women are already inducted with messages, so what business do you have sending one?" And, (modulo COVID) most folks don't meet on online dating sites. And there's a skewed gender balance there too. I mean, how often have we heard that "online dating isn't real life"?
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 05:54 AM
-8

Who exactly is telling you that you shouldn't want to get married? Leaving aside the whole "disrupt the nuclear family, marriage is a oppressive patriarchal construct" branch of feminism, even mainstream relatively liberal feminists impose rules really do make courtship unworkable if you follow them to the letter. Of course, there's always exceptions at the woman's discretion or when it's politically useful (see Bill Clinton). If she was really into you, she will not mind being asked out even if…
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 04:46 AM
2

I do believe that's still covered under rule #1. Right now, I'm working on convincing myself that this is stupid, and I have every right to ask someone out or the like just as they have every right to do the same or turn me down. But I'm still a bit bitter that I learned this toxic lesson in the first place.
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 03:52 AM
0

1) Don't flirt with or otherwise display any sort of romantic or sexual interest in strangers. ("She's just at the coffee shop to get coffee, at the gym to work out, at whatever interest group you're involved in to do whatever that interest is into, at work to get work done and she doesn't want to deal with strangers hitting on her...") AND 2) Don't flirt with or otherwise show romantic or sexual interest in friends... ("You were just pretending to be her friend to get into her pants!"). Togethe…
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 03:08 AM
-5

What exactly do you mean by 'treat women like human beings'? By that do you mean "Recognize that they're granted certain inalienable rights by their creator" or "Treat them exactly the same way you treat guys you're not attracted to"?
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 02:22 AM
1

If a 5'2 100lb woman attacks me physically there's a real chance that I'll not be able to defend myself. If I do, I risk going to jail as the 'aggressor'. Being able to manipulate the law to your favor is power. There are many women who have gotten off after shooting their husbands in their sleep. A woman who massacres her family is a tragic victim, not a perpetrator in the eyes of a great deal of the public. Don't like it? Then tell your fellow men to stop being abusive jerk offs and maybe wome…
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 01:51 AM
-5

I like most of this, but I do have my own couple of disagreements. ..instead of enjoying the process with your lover... I don't see how anyone can enjoy the process. Enjoy the relationship that results, sure. That's the whole point. But the process of getting there is painful and difficult. Do people really want to go back to a time where divorce wasn't an option? Or when everybody had to wait to get sex after marriage? No? Yes, I do. Mostly. Yes, we still should allow divorce in cases of abuse,…
/r/ExRedPill22/12/20 01:32 AM
-15

As stated, not a dating strategy. No 'rules' in feminism are aimed at helping people get laid. No, the point of the rules is to make life more comfortable for (some) women, no matter what the cost is to everyone else. They have no problem imposing this crippling anxiety on me for even wanting marriage just so long as they get to save some women the minor inconvenience of rejecting an unwanted suitor. And that's my objection. If you expect me to follow your rules, you have to give a damn about me…
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 11:20 PM
-20

The feminists have plenty to say about reshaping society in the areas of dating and courtship. If you're struggling because you don't see any way to find success while obeying all of their rules, don't you have a right to criticize them?
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 10:41 PM
3

I did read it and took it seriously. I also disagree with some of it's conclusions. That's not a contradiction.
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 10:26 PM
-1

I don't know you personally so there is no way I can answer your question. We are talking about society as a whole, anyway. So, why are you saying that I have power then? Why are you saying it's acceptable to hurt me in any way you like just to make women feel slightly better? Lol not getting laid isn't discrimination against you. Finding a wife isn't the same thing as 'getting laid'. Does that apply to the forever alone women too? That's the topic that brought us here to begin with, no? You wou…
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 09:46 PM
-7

You never answered my question though. In what way do I, an individual, have power over anyone else? I'm not in any sort of leadership position. I'm not a police officer or firefighter or animal control officer or the like who has the legal right to give orders to my fellow citizens. I'm not an elected official with the power to craft legislation. I'm not an office manager or tech lead or anything of the sort that gives me authority over others in the workplace. I'm not a married man nor do I ha…
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 09:31 PM
-9

Since when am I someone in power? Since when are the kind of folks who are utterly terrified of dating because of the feminist messaging on this issue are in power? I reject every part of this argument, but even by it's own terms it doesn't make sense. And by its own terms, it confirms what you're attempting to deny: Women have the upper hand in these areas.
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 09:06 PM
-14

Women aren't told that they're horrible objectifying creeps for having desires in this area the way men are. This doesn't mean that they can't have trouble with courtship, or that they don't encounter ungentlemanly behavior from some badly behaved men, but it does mean that society generally has their back in a way that doesn't apply to most men in this situation.
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 08:17 PM
1

The causal nature of the ill effects of promiscuity doesn't matter to me. The fact that it's correlated is proof enough that I should avoid it and that I shouldn't marry someone who was promiscuous.
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 07:59 PM
1

What experiment or study could you design that would test this? It's not like we can randomly assign experiment groups to have casual sex.
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 07:42 PM
0

Can you provide a source that promiscuity actively causes divorce? Remember the difference between causation and correlation. If I'm looking for a wife, does this really matter? No matter what way the correlation goes, it's a sign that my marriage would have lower odds of success than it otherwise might. Besides, men are more likely to cheat Not by all that much. And younger (read: generally considered to be more attractive, and thus having more opportunity) women, are more likely to cheat than …
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 07:27 PM
-1

This is social science. Nobody is unbiased. You think that sociology department researcher who sees it as their life's work to promote their left-wing worldview isn't biased? If you have some specific source of bias in what's being reported, point it out rather than trying to say that only your ideological compatriots are trustworthy.
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 07:12 PM
0

It mentions a study from the Institute of Family Studies, which is heavily right-wing biased. Oh noes, conservatives participating in a sociological debate. How horrible. Remember, you can only believe the left-wing sources out there. Only they can be trusted... I mean, I'm pretty conservative leaning myself. Saying "But they're right wing" is going to make think "Yeah, and? What's wrong with that?"
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 06:52 PM
0

What’s wrong with casual sex? Men and women who sleep around are more likely to divorce and generally are less happy in marriage. That causes lasting harm.
/r/ExRedPill21/12/20 06:25 PM
1

I just read on r/twoxchromosomes or maybe r/datingoverthirty a really touching story about a woman taking her BF's virginity. You will find women willing, it just depends on your relationship and her personality. Top result in /r/twoxchromosomes is a rant about how horrible it is to be waiting for one's future spouse. The top comments in the top result on /datingoverthirty talk about how waiting for marriage in the modern day means you'll be facing long odds and how it's quite foolish.
/r/ExRedPill19/12/20 07:59 PM
-1

That's not really been my experience around 'blue pill' and 'feminist' types.
/r/ExRedPill19/12/20 12:14 AM
2

A sexual experience gap between partners is also correlated with lower levels of love, satisfaction and commitment. So, what's with the mockery of those who do complain about n-count then? Why is it a bad thing for me to want to marry a virgin?
/r/ExRedPill18/12/20 11:30 PM
0

This can't be possible in a monogamous society where male to female ratio around dating age is balanced. Sure it is. If men collectively want the relationship more, they're going to have to work harder on average. One could also argue that we're not a monogamous society. After all, most people have multiple partners over a lifetime.
/r/ExRedPill18/12/20 05:57 PM
0

Even so, men still have to do the wooing in a long-term relationship or marriage. And it's a lot easier to be wooed than to do the wooing.
/r/ExRedPill18/12/20 05:42 PM
1

Political stance. It says to be apolitical, but the dominant ideology is clearly conservative/traditionalist - and I think it's pretty one sided, and also does not seem to be beneficial at all for men; and in some cases ends up resembling fascism itself. I'm not sure how much traditionalists would approve of things like 'plate spinning' and the like. Or the red pill's general opposition to marriage. Too much quantitative - they seem to reduce everything to something measurable, which does not re…
/r/ExRedPill18/12/20 05:25 PM
1

I'm willing to wait until marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/20 12:31 AM
3

When a woman has to “grow into” wanting to sleep with you over any significant period of time, it’s only because she doesn’t really find you particularly sexually attractive but eventually finds you relationship attractive, and that’s the sucker’s bet - exactly the opposite of the pattern you want to establish a good, long-lasting relationship. How's that? Why is lust more important to establishing a good relationship than liking the relationship itself?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/20 02:10 AM
1

The biggest drop happens between 18 and 21. And I can't help but wonder how that looks when you normalize for the man's earning power.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/20 06:14 PM
1

I've met grown men who look just fine but have the social skills of a 7th grader, whose first topic of conversation is how they want to become a twitch streamer or what internet gurus they listen to. These guys could benefit from having better personalities but the problem is that they're so far behind that it'd take months or years to turn them into a guy who can intuitively attract women. So... What exactly is a 'better personality'?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/20 11:40 AM
2

I still remember one of the women I went to college with admit openly to how she totally wanted to get married later, but for now was just interested in 'having fun'.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/20 11:21 AM
1

Is she interesting in a man providing a decant living, or is she going to try to play status games with his money? One of these I'd be very interested in. The other, I wouldn't tolerate in the slightest.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/20 11:10 AM
1

I've had zero success ever in dating and courtship. Ever. I'd like to get married someday, and I want a wife who's views that as importantly as I do. I just have no idea how to approach the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/20 10:08 AM
1

Every time I've seen 'blue pill' dating 'advice' or how they and their feminist allies would like society to work, they seems to focus on setting up rules that prioritize avoiding even the slightest possibility of imposing even the slightest inconvenience to women. Rather or not an average man who's terrified of breaking one of these rules can find a wife is not even a concern of those. They'll go further and say that it shouldn't be a concern of theirs, that they'll prioritize women's convenien…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/20 08:42 AM
3

I'm not specifically complaining about you. Just the general direction of these kind of arguments and my own situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/20 01:38 AM
7

I wish I could find a partner who has had as many partners as I have had. But apparently that makes a 'virgin obsession' in the eyes of the folks who are critical of such things.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/20 12:36 AM
1

The point of labor is producing value. So no, there really isn't that much more. If I'm not producing value for someone else, I might as well be producing value for myself and just go off and do something I enjoy. I don't believe in make work.
/r/ExRedPill11/10/20 05:42 AM
4

4.2 partners is a lot when you're a virgin dutifully waiting your future wife.
/r/ExRedPill11/10/20 03:25 AM
1

Are you really saying that if you woke up with $1M in the bank, your first thought would be "I really need $2M..."? Surely there's a point more cash on hand isn't going to improve your life any? Surely there's some point where you want to retire? My goal is financial independence. If it's only me, I'm there. If I have to support a wife and family, I'm not. Simple as that....
/r/ExRedPill10/10/20 08:38 PM
-2

In my case, if I wasn't wanting to find a wife I probably wouldn't bother trying to find another job. I'd just move to a low cost of living area and retire early, maybe working part time to finish up my social security credits. So... Yeah. Women's demands for economic status are causing me to invest far more time looking for (and hopefully actually doing) work than my demands for beauty would ever impose on them. I'd also add that most of the threads I see about beauty routines in places like /r…
/r/ExRedPill10/10/20 07:55 PM
-3

How many hours a week to men spend at work, building the kind of career that puts them in an economically attractive position?
/r/ExRedPill10/10/20 07:38 PM
2

All you can focus on is becoming a better human being. In turn, you will become a better judge of character because you yourself know what makes a good person and will only let good people around your life. And if it happens that these people change and betray you, all you can ever do is move on and learn. How on earth does that follow? Lots of good people become poor judges of character for exactly this reason: They don't see the evil that man capable of towards his (or her) fellow man. It seem…
/r/ExRedPill10/10/20 10:43 AM
1

The two best articulated pieces describing the reasons for the existence of 'Incels' are Untitled and Radicalizing the Romanceless both on Slate Star Codex.
/r/ExRedPill08/10/20 07:36 AM
1

Alimony is pretty much only awarded to stay-at-home parents after being married for many years, as far as I'm aware. Taking it away ignores the sacrifice of stay-at-home parents and makes it harder for them to leave abusive relationships and get back on their feet. If ones marriage was long enough, then the provider might be on the hook for life. A lot of times, alimony is awarded only in the form of a one time lump sum. Pay it once when assets are split, and no more ties to the other person. So…
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 08:19 PM
0

So, I present to you evidence to the contrary and your answer is that I don't know what I'm talking about?
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 07:34 PM
1

But the feminists often fight tooth and nail against any effort to limit alimony.
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 07:23 PM
0

You sure? Because according to what I read, all states have the option of no-fault divorce and most do not recognize fault. I think this is a problem because it creates edge cases where someone can be rewarded for infidelity and other bad behavior in the marriage.
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 07:13 PM
1

Are there any states that are not no-fault these days? Isn't advocating for no-fault divorce exactly the kind of policy I'm against?
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 06:54 PM
0

Who says infidelity isn't taken into consideration? Most of the lawyers who publish information about my state's laws say exactly that. You may have noticed that adultery and other forms of marital misconduct weren't mentioned in this list of factors. That's because generally speaking, judges aren't allowed to consider marital misconduct when making decisions about alimony. The purpose of alimony is to simply to make sure that neither spouse falls into poverty when the marriage ends. Alimony isn…
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 06:17 PM
1

You only pay alimony if you marry a housewife. This isn't necessarily true. Even if the spouse is working, you may have to pay alimony to maintain the standard of living they had while in the marriage if you outearn them. A lot of these sexist dudes insist their wife shouldn't work, but don't want to actually be responsible for her. It's disgusting. There's a difference between saying that one isn't responsible for supporting their wife and saying that one isn't responsible for supporting a woma…
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 07:56 AM
5

And FYI there are other ways marriages can burn a guy besides alimony - Losing half of your assets, your children getting taken away from you, and child support to name a few. If you're going to have children with someone, you're going to face the possibility of a custody battle rather or not you're married to them. Yes, men are at a disadvantage here, and yes the actions of being a good provider and a good husband often count against you in fighting for custody, and yes these are both major iss…
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 07:42 AM
0

Absent claims and evidence to the contrary, yes. It means you're the one who abandoned the relationship.
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 07:32 AM
1

Because it's entirely possible that all of the women that receive alimony did not cheat Is it? Given that infidelity isn't taken into account in determining alimony, why would you think that that no woman who receives alimony has cheated? Where is the evidence of an overlap of the % of women that cheat and women that collect alimony? In my mind, even one case of this happening is one too many. This should not be possible. Saying that it's rare doesn't remove the objection to this.
/r/ExRedPill06/10/20 07:01 AM
0

I wish I could. But I doubt that I will. I'm not a member of the church.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/20 03:24 AM
1

When I was 18, I was sure I wanted to get married someday even though I wasn't sure who I was going to marry. That mean that I was preparing myself to be a good husband. And that meant taking dating seriously and not having casual sex. In my mind, if one spends their 20's sleeping around, they're not going to be all that invested in their later marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/20 06:35 PM
3

The problem is that most women still expect their husbands to out-earn them and resent them when they don't. This is why divorce is more common when women out-earn men than vice versa.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/20 09:01 PM
1

How would someone set up a date without some sort of text chat? Even the basic logistics of where and when and what and so on...
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/20 09:51 AM
1

You haven't provided proof of large amounts of people getting divorced on a whim So, what do you make of the significant number of people who get divorced because they "grew apart" or something of that nature? Your argument boils down to "Believe me, there's something more serious under the surface". I don't know why I should assume that's true given the contradiction with the obvious straight forward reading of that answer. for the sole purpose of collecting alimony. I never claimed that. I hav…
/r/ExRedPill19/09/20 01:24 AM
1

The breadwinner sacrifices so much for their family, why do you think that's not a big deal? Do you have any clue how hard they work? Or how unlikely it is that a family court will look favorably on that hard work in the event of a divorce? Judges don't want to give custody to those who've been the primary provider.
/r/ExRedPill19/09/20 01:14 AM
2

Except it's not unpaid labor if they're getting a share of the property.
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 09:51 AM
2

Default shared custody won't happen because it's not practical for every couple, and not always best for the children. Even if both parents are willing, able, and not abusive. Bad idea there. Then let the couple negotiate for what is best for them starting from an even playing field. As it is, we can end up forcing someone who would rather be a parent to go to work and pay the other parent to put the children into daycare because that's the way things worked during the marriage. And if we give o…
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 09:36 AM
2

I disagree. A lot of the things that make a good spouse are quite boring. Finical responsibility, prioritizing the children's care, planning for the future... Most of that is quite boring in the day to day. Life isn't continuous fun and excitement.
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 07:14 AM
3

It's hard to move on with your life if you're still forced to be the provider for a family you're no longer permitted to be a part of. Under California State law, the cause of the divorce makes no difference in terms of alimony. The only exception to this is abuse. So infidelity and "I'm bored" make no impact on the spousal support. Okay then, if this is so rare, would you object to changing the law to make it impossible? How about we reserve alimony to cases where one can prove that the other p…
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 06:02 AM
1

Exactly, and why are those reasons not valid to you? How exactly do you square the promises made when marrying someone with "It's just fine to leave because you're bored or unhappy or because you 'grew apart' or because you fell out of wuuuv"? The betrayal of someone's word and promise matters. It may be necessary if the other partner has already broken their vows, but it's never a good thing. Which means women are evil and spiteful. Yes, some women are evil and spiteful. I'd say the same thing …
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 04:56 AM
1

If we had default shared custody, this wouldn't be an issue. As it is, the desire to try to maintain the situation as it was before the divorce generally puts men at a disadvantage when it comes to custody.
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 04:42 AM
2

Because it's a literally life destroying event. And because the way it's set up, it punishes me for doing my job within the marriage. Suppose that I am the perfect husband: I work hard to earn enough money so that she can stay home and and raise our children. Suppose that after 10 years, she says "I'm bored" and files for divorce. Or, hell, suppose she cheats on me because it doesn't make all that much of a difference. Because I was busy providing for my family, I'm at a disadvantage as far as c…
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 04:31 AM
1

It's legally not having any commitment to the other person anymore. Unless you're the one stuck paying for a family that you're no longer a member of. Or you're stuck in the role of being a good husband and providing for your now ex-wife. If one person is a stay-at-home parent, they gave up their career and should be compensated. It's a simple concept that you aren't understanding. If I give up one job for another, I can't quit and demand that they continue to pay me because I gave up that first…
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 04:00 AM
1

I knew one woman who divorced her husband because he was caught with child pornography. I'd say that counts as abuse. I knew another couple who got divorced because they were fighting 24/7 and they decided it was best to separate so the kids didn't have to witness it, plus they had endless problems with other family members. If folks want to mutually separate in a situation like this, then divorce might be the least bad option. But it's still bad here. And I see lots of cases where at least one …
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 03:41 AM
0

I have, and I've seen lots of results that are not abuse and infedelity.
/r/ExRedPill18/09/20 03:28 AM
3

People don't get divorced because there's a reward. At the end of 2019, the Netherlands changed their laws to limit the time alimony was paid. Prior to this, was a spike in new divorce filings among those who were hoping to beat the deadline. In other words, yes, incentives do change human behavior. And yes, more generous alimony does result in more divorces. The only "reward" is getting away from their partner they are incompatible with. Getting a continuing payment to support yourself while no…
/r/ExRedPill17/09/20 09:12 PM
-1

Oh, the radical idea that one shouldn't be rewarded for abandoning their commitments. How "Fucked up" of me to think like that.
/r/ExRedPill17/09/20 08:53 PM
-4

You act as if infidelity and abuse are the only legit reasons to divorce Uh... Yes? Because they are? The whole point of marriage is "As long as you honor your obligations, I'll honor mine". "I'm not happy" doesn't fall into that category. Bad sex life? Work on fixing it, or realize that it's not worth destroying your marriage over. Money problems? How does a divorce help that, if not at the expense of one of the partners? Lack of communication? Put in the effort to be better at communicating. O…
/r/ExRedPill17/09/20 08:25 PM
-26

Infidelity as a whole is roughly equal between genders. Younger women are more likely to cheat, likely because they have more opportunity to cheat. Ditto for older men. Women file for something on the order of 70% of divorces, and the majority of those don't have anything to do with abandonment, infidelity or abuse. In my mind, that's also breaking the marriage contract. Obviously anyone (man or woman) who breaks the marriage contract by abuse, cheating, whatever deserves to get fucked. And that…
/r/ExRedPill17/09/20 07:55 PM
-28

Not if she files for divorce for frivolous reasons. Or if she is unfaithful. Then she gets to walk away from her duties in the marriage while you're still obligated to be the provider for her lifestyle. And the better provider you were in marriage, the more you have to pay in the event of a divorce even if you're not at fault. It's like a punishment for being a good husband.
/r/ExRedPill17/09/20 07:40 PM
-32

Yeah it's total bullshit, these guys want to have a good stay-at-home wife/mom but they also don't want to pay to support such wife and children. Part of paying to support a stay-at-home wife is actually being married to her. You shouldn't have to uphold your obligations in marriage if she's unwilling to uphold hers.
/r/ExRedPill17/09/20 07:28 PM
1

At my age, I'm finding this unlikely. I waited, but I'm increasingly sure that nobody waited for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/20 04:50 PM
12

In this context, it's a sign that they have always held these values around sex, even when it was inconvenient for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/20 10:51 AM
2

Yes, yes, and more yes. This would be a dream come true for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/20 10:49 AM
1

Or maybe people experience interactions with each other differently than you do and what came naturally to you isn't natural to others.
/r/ExRedPill31/08/20 08:03 AM
1

1: I realized every good date I’ve ever been on was just me being a normal human and vibing with the girl. Never once did I actually think of IOIs or any of that PUA bullshit Ah, here we go again. How dare someone who's struggling with dating and courtship try to attack the problem with reason?!?!? Don't they know that they should just feel it? Turns out that reading people usually takes conscious thought. And given how many rules and imperatives boil down to reading the tea leaves, that's not t…
/r/ExRedPill31/08/20 07:13 AM
-7

Right up until it comes to dealing with conservatives or those who disagree with the feminists....
/r/ExRedPill12/08/20 06:59 PM
2

Have these people considered the wild change in financial situation of most citizens over the years? The personal income of the average worker, in any field of the workforce, has only changed by a decent margin. From 23500 dollars in 1975 to around 32000 dollars in the present day. This would support the point of view of the older folks, who say "Why are these people protesting to get paid 15 bucks an hour? I worked for 8 dollars an hour and I never complained!". But there is one big aspect to a…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/20 08:28 AM
1

I am... Not that it's saved me from mockery in this very thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/20 05:50 AM
0

How the fuck are woman supposed to give sex to men they date but then get labeled as ruined when they do. the fuck do you guys want lmao. I want someone who's reserving sex for the person they intend to marry. Because that's what I've done so far in life. Because that's what a good spouse does for their partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/20 11:30 PM
0

Systemizing is in fact dehumanizing. You may not realize it but once you reduce someone's rich and complex internal life down to statistics, you've removed the human element from the equation. There's no way to know anything about someone else's 'complex internal life'. Claims about it are all but un-falsifiable, unlike claims about observable behavior. There is a a BIG difference between seeing problems in your relationship as a problem to solve, and another when you reduce your partner or pote…
/r/ExRedPill08/07/20 05:49 AM
-2

I don't see systematizing as dehumanizing. Thinking of your fellow human beings as having certain individual rights is a system, and a damn good one for build a moral and ethical philosophy and keeping one's behavior in check. If we're not supposed to approach dating and courtship with a problem solving mindset, how are we supposed to solve the problems we have with it?
/r/ExRedPill07/07/20 03:05 AM
1

First off, I'm not exactly seeing the 'red pill' crowd as defenders of the traditional family. The whole moral justification they give for 'plate spinning' is "embrace the decline": In other words in their minds the traditional family is already dead, women are just using them, and therefore it's okay to use women. Redpillers/MGTOWs often talk about settling with a 'traditional wife' (like a mail order bride from Eastern Europe/Asia) so they can 'raise their boys right'. But........don't they re…
/r/ExRedPill08/03/20 02:46 PM
1

Unfortunately, family and child therapists report that the most common problem they face is parents refusing to address their own shortcomings and labeling their child as a problem child or mentally ill. %s/parents/teachers/g and you've described my own experience growing up to a tee. Which is why this issue still is one that I describe as harshly as I do.
/r/ExRedPill06/03/20 10:40 AM
0

Even if this was the case, redpillers offer literally no solutions. I'm not exactly a redpiller, but I can list several things... Schools shouldn't be in the business of trying to cajole and force parents into drugging boys into submission. As a policy, I don't think it's a teacher's place to tell a parent to "say this than and the other to a doctor so that your child can be put on ADHD drugs which may have serious consequences for them down the road" and as such I think that this is something t…
/r/ExRedPill06/03/20 10:15 AM
0

Two can pay at that game... Women initiate most divorces. And a good chunk of those divorces have nothing to do with abuse, abandonment or infidelity. I've already morally condemned the behavior you speak of. So I'm not quite sure how pointing that it happens is adding anything to the argument.
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 10:04 PM
0

Sorry, honoring commitments and caring for one another is a whole hellofalot more important than how often people orgasm. I think it's wrong to treat one's partner as a disposable means of sexual gratification, and that applies to the man who trades in his loyal wife for a younger model as much as it applies to a woman who divorces her devoted husband because she no longer feels the 'tingles'.
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 09:51 PM
0

Reports of being happy is again subjective. Those same communities have severe social stigmas about complaining about marriage too Perhaps, but we're in the context of an anonymous survey and as I pointed out, we still see this correlation between virginity and successful marriages regardless of faith. Just because woman out earns the man doesn’t mean that she is educated with a good career Simulationeously! The thing is low income housing often has more marital stress and lower class are more l…
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 09:26 PM
0

imo then what is the point of a marriage then? Might as well start getting a good friend of yours and be lifelong roomates then. Because commitment and trust matter. Because maybe someday I want to have a family of my own and that's a job I'd rather not take on my own. Because friends are not family no matter how close they are.
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 08:52 PM
1

If you have a wife who no longer loves you, but is willing to live with you as roommate and do duty sex ocassionally, will you be okay with that, as long as the arrangement last until death do you part? UUhh.... Yes? Feelings of love are something far too fickle to build a life together on. People fall into and out of love all the time.
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 08:34 PM
1

Feminists don't deny that divorce rate is lower for virgins but it is not our bone of contention because we don't view divorce exactly as a bad thing. And I think this is foolishness in the extreme. We are also sensible enough to know that correlation doesn't imply causations (Statistics 101 literally) . As far as choosing a spouse goes, why does it matter which direction the causation goes? Also if you are really set on trying to minimise the odds of divorce, you should marry when both of you a…
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 08:22 PM
0

Virgins divorce less, but Virgins are religious fundamentalists pretty often and it is a SIN to divorce in those circles(Virgins are also 3% of the population in America) But those who get married as virgins also report being generally happier with their marriages. And as I pointed out in my post, there's no difference in divorce rates by faith when controlled for virginity. So it's more than just "people who are virgins when they marry are religious fundamentalists who don't divorce" The more c…
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 07:47 PM
2

As if the "there's no such thing as virginity, and if you disagree you're a horrible person" feminist crowd doesn't have a dog in the fight as far as their research findings go either... It's hard to scare me with the vast right-wing boogyman if I generally support their worldview and biases to begin with. The fact that there are people who don't live up to their commitments doesn't mean that society shouldn't be encouraging people to keep their promises. You're saying that not everyone did righ…
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 11:09 AM
4

Those who have had more sexual partners prior to marriage are less likely to stay with that marriage. This hold true regardless of religion. Folks who have had more premarital partners also report having less satisfaction in their eventual marriages. So, yes, this part is true. But the RP folks tend to be hypocrites here because they suggest that it's somehow vastly different when a man sleeps around.
/r/ExRedPill23/02/20 04:22 AM
1

In this day and age, what knowledge does one require taking on large amounts of debt to acquire?
/r/ExRedPill13/02/20 11:52 AM
1

It's a lot easier to find a partner when you're a 23 year old virgin than when you're 29 or 32. It's a lot easier to find a partner when you're in university and around people your own age. I think there's value in acknowledging that. I wouldn't focus nearly as much on my career and studies in hindsight knowing that the window for finding a spouse was closing as fast as it was.
/r/ExRedPill10/02/20 09:41 PM
1

I had a very different experience myself 2-3 years out of college then you did apparently. I found that I was further than ever from having any chance of finding a wife. Every day that goes by, the task gets harder, there's fewer eligible women and they demand more of me.
/r/ExRedPill10/02/20 06:02 AM
0

You got all upset when I pointed out that sex was overrated, because I apparently hurt your feelings. No that wasn't the basis of the argument I had with you. You also pointed out that you never actually turned down any women who wanted to sleep with you... you just never found a woman who would have you. That's also not true. So you weren't actually "dedicated" to a future relationship, you just didn't have anything else to do. Purposely avoiding temptation to stray still counts as avoiding bad…
/r/ExRedPill10/02/20 05:14 AM
0

Your views are too extreme and unrealistic. I don't ask for anything I don't provide. Fact is I waited and sacrificed to that the woman I marry will be my first and only. Why am I not deserving of the same from her? you’re likely going to have a lot of difficulty with the kind of thinking that puts people being scared of losing you and having emotional hardships of their own at the same moral equilancy of violently penetrating someone against their will I never said that and you know it. I'm sur…
/r/ExRedPill10/02/20 04:55 AM
0

Does this kill your ability to have a meaningful marriage later? Does this make you a worse person? Uhh.... Yes? There's a reason I haven't been having sex with people I don't intend to marry. Would you feel the need to hide this part of yourself from your future partner? I would consider hiding sexual history from a future partner to be rape by fraud. I might be tempted, but it's so morally and ethically reprehensible that I wouldn't.
/r/ExRedPill09/02/20 05:09 PM
-1

They had a post stickies not all that long ago saying that women have a right to lie about their sexual history.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/20 02:45 PM
-1

None of the ‘games’ are harmful to the other person - they will not harm the men in any way. Lying is always harmful. FDS actively supports women lying to get a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/20 02:30 PM
0

If you’re actually dedicated to the relationship and not being influenced by insecurities then you would quickly realize that you’re not better or worse than anyone else for being a virgin or having dozens of partners in the past, for having a tattoo or three, for making mistakes or even making good choices and having good memories and experiences that teach you more about yourself. If this were true, then why do folks who have more partners outside of marriage divorce more frequently? Part of g…
/r/ExRedPill08/02/20 10:37 AM
2

Again, what makes you say that? What chemicals are imbalanced? How do we test for said imbalance? Who reported this and how do they know that?
/r/ExRedPill08/02/20 05:50 AM
-2

I always find it amazing when people say it's unrealistic for someone to be a 'debt free virgin without tattoos' in their 20's when I'm a 'debt free virgin without tattoos' in my early 30's. Just how hard is to not spend your 20's sleeping around hoping to meet a good spouse after you 'had your fun'? How hard it it to realize that if you want to get married someday that you should probably think of the consequences of what you're doing now on that future marriage? Is it unrealistic to ask that m…
/r/ExRedPill08/02/20 01:53 AM
3

I qualify... I'm just a guy.
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 08:54 PM
8

A silly assumption to put on all men. I am objectively a very high performer in the sack, with a significantly oversized member, and am not concerned with being measured up (figuratively or literally) against any past partner. Scoff and roll your eyes all you want, but the reason I would prefer a virgin is for the simple reason that statistically and anecdotally, a woman who has had less partners will be more capable of pair bonding effectively. If you have not perused the studies that have conf…
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 06:51 PM
-2

Stop putting words in my mouth, then.
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 04:49 PM
1

Unlike the quote, I speak only for myself. Not all men. I just happen to agree with most of what it's saying.
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 04:22 PM
-10

I get that debt is a tool that can yield returns above the cost of borrowing. I also think that a lot of debt isn't entered into with that mindset. Moreover, I don't need my future wife to earn me a living. It's great that you were able to build a real business from nothing, but in all honesty it's not something I'm necessarily going to be especially attracted to (or repelled from).
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 04:12 PM
-8

And also a sign of smart investments. You literally say it could go both ways but choose to rely only on the second, your argument. Okay, what 'smart investments' could my future wife have been making that justify large amounts of debt?
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 03:53 PM
-24

They've bought into the western world view that fatter wallets equals better morality. The act of creating more than one consumes is a very moral thing. But there are some caveats here: One shouldn't mistake the outward signs of wealth for wealth (see my next point), but I'm not sure I'd completely disagree with this. How one got their wealth matters in this kind of argument: The thief and the beneficiary of the public purse still get demerits for taking their wealth from others, those who inher…
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 03:07 PM
2

Aka, Smile or die. Yeah, I'm going question that. At what point does the demand for having a 'positive attitude' turn into an inhuman demand to respond to hardship with joy. Talking about how one should keep going and focus on working the problem is one thing. Talking about how one can never experience frustration, despair or sadness in these issues quite another.
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 02:41 PM
2

What makes you say anything about a 'chemical imbalance'?
/r/ExRedPill07/02/20 02:18 PM
1

Of all the criticisms leveled, I think this one is one of the weakest. Of course dating is not natural, one has to learn how to be a good partner. One has to learn how to live with another. What's the alternative you propose? That we're not to use the rational problem-solving part of our brain in matters dating, courtship and marriage? To suggest that we're bad people for trying to trying to build a system at all?
/r/ExRedPill04/02/20 02:51 AM
5

Women get sex and relationships for merely existing. They don't have to put in that kind of effort at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/20 09:58 PM
3

As cocky as it is, once you know you’re a step ahead of most men you will have the confidence to talk to all women and then you get to chose. I've found it's quite the opposite for me. By the time you get everything together and you think you might almost be finally ready to be a good husband, there's not a lot of good women left. If anything, you're at a disadvantage for having waited because most women really don't value a lot of the things that make someone a good man.
/r/ExRedPill10/01/20 02:18 AM
2

Focus on being a good man and you will find a good women. I have to disagree with this. Men still have to make an effort to specifically find a woman in a way that women don't have to do in order to find a man. It doesn't just happen on its own as a consequence of being a good man.
/r/ExRedPill09/01/20 06:31 PM
1

And who's to say that everything progressives suggest is a step towards a better future for humanity? Eugenics was once a progressive project, as was socialism. There are progressives today who still defend the horrendous death toll of the Holodomor and the Cultural Revolution with pithy phrases like 'you have to break a few eggs to make an omelet'.
/r/ExRedPill19/12/19 10:07 PM
1

“Traditional values” don’t hold up very well to intellectual scrutiny. Time and time again, they do. Mankind and human nature have not changed that much in human history. Cultures developed their values often for very good reasons and tend to experience unforeseen consequences when they abandon them without good reasons.
/r/ExRedPill19/12/19 01:45 AM
1

for what reasons, who knows... Bias and bigotry, of course. Is political tribalism really that hard to understand? I mean, when folks outright admit that they'll discriminate against Conservative collueges, maybe there's an issue there.
/r/ExRedPill17/12/19 11:54 PM
0

Given that men statistically and drastically overestimate hours of household and childrearing labour, I doubt that. Your study focuses families with newborns and babies. There's no guarantee that this applies universally. Also note that housework logged before children is approximately the same for both men and women according to your source. Once again, cherrypicking. Very few people reasonably think that divorce is a satisfactory response to boredom in absence of a person taking responsibility…
/r/ExRedPill17/12/19 08:57 AM
1

Time available for leisure pursuits is directly germane to the discussion and they are listed and categorised in the same table. Not really. You made a specific claim that divorce is caused by women doing more work both inside and outside of the house than men. I don't think that's true based on the numbers I saw there. Now, I did make a mistake here, I forgot the rows for 'caring for household members' and 'caring for nonhousehold numbers'. So, let's do that: For men it's a total of .51 hours. …
/r/ExRedPill16/12/19 09:28 PM
-1

I'm not American but I can use the data. I note you omitted caring for household/non-household members and set aside the hours spent on leisure pursuits from the same table? That does change the figure you're using. The household activities figures in that table don't appear to include leisure pressures. I'm not sure why that would be relevant... Seeking companionship isn't harmful, but let's be honest: RP is not promoting healthy, monogamous relationships. The fact that "plating" and "dread-gam…
/r/ExRedPill16/12/19 12:42 PM
-1

Women are increasingly working full-time in greater proportions, increasingly entering highly paid professions, and in increasing numbers becoming the family breadwinner. Hours spent on domestic and caregiving labour still exceeds what is being done by men. Working full time or even being the breadwinner isn't the same time as working the same number of hours. We see this in the debate over the so-called 'gender pay gap' where the feminists want to stick everyone into a full-time bucket and igno…
/r/ExRedPill16/12/19 10:53 AM
-4

Not only that, but there’s a reason the vast majority of actual biologists, psychologists, and social scientists working professionally are leftwing and/or feminists. Yes, because academia is quite hostile to conservatives and generally discriminates against them. This has lead to massive ideological blind spots that allow bad scholarship to gain acceptance because it's politically useful.
/r/ExRedPill16/12/19 07:28 AM
-2

So? Someone's going to file for it. Given that adultery rates indicate that men cheat on women at a statistically higher rate, of course women are going to end marriages earlier. Given that arguments about domestic labour usually arise from women taking on a disproportional burden of care and domestic work which they cite as being a destructive factor in their marriages, of course they're going to end marriages. And even in the event when a marriage dissolution is bipartisan and amicable, someon…
/r/ExRedPill16/12/19 07:16 AM
-2

If you need mental health support, /r/menslib is a great sub that is very helpful for men. I've always found that whenever /r/menslib has a choice between supporting feminism and supporting men, they choose the former. I think that shows where their priorities are.
/r/ExRedPill16/12/19 05:50 AM
1

A few posts ago you were a great provider (your own words). Now you're unemployed, broke and living with your parents. Which is it? If it's the latter, you can definitely do something about that. Turns out that even a software engineer's salary isn't enough to justify moving out. The thing that makes me better prepared for the future (saving like mad by living at home) is also a hindrance to dating (because I'm still living in a home my parents own). I worked in big tech for 4 years, put away a …
/r/ExRedPill02/12/19 11:21 AM
1

If it's not the job and the money it will be something else. Most women will reject a man who's unemployed at my age or still lives in their parent's home at my age. You know that, and yet you pretend that doesn't matter. Why? You are getting upset because something you did means you had to go a while without getting laid. Boo freaking hoo. What's it like to be such a special snowflake? If you think this is me whining that I'll have to go a while without getting laid then you misunderstand every…
/r/ExRedPill30/11/19 08:57 PM
1

Working my butt off in big tech so that maybe someday I can be a good provider? Avoiding dating until I'm in a place to be a good husband? Remaining a virgin? I think you missed the point of my question. What I was asking was whether avoiding dating and remaining a virgin was actually a choice, or whether it was something forced upon you because you weren't that attractive to begin with. Now again, remaining a virgin is a perfectly legitimate choice to make, but you sound like you're just trying…
/r/ExRedPill30/11/19 11:12 AM
1

And what sacrifices are those, specifically? Working my butt off in big tech so that maybe someday I can be a good provider? Avoiding dating until I'm in a place to be a good husband? Remaining a virgin? Oh, and I've been a virgin myself. I was a virgin until 27 (almost 28), when I became a non-virgin. Let me tell you from experience, there is nothing special about being a virgin. Your life won't change one bit after getting your v-card stamped. You'll still be the same person you are today. And…
/r/ExRedPill30/11/19 02:59 AM
1

Can you imagine live in a house where you sleep in separate room from your wife for years? Because that is often the compromise back home, if a couple no longer wants to be together, but too ashamed to get a divorce. This separate rooms, separate lives-life is reality for some of my family members back in that place. That's still better than being removed from your home and family family, being told that a custody battle will only hurt the kids then finding that you're still responsible for prov…
/r/ExRedPill29/11/19 10:11 AM
1

If my husband left me tomorrow, I will be fine. If I left him tomorrow, he will be fine. And that was why I married him. Relationship is something that should be entered voluntarily, including marriage. Yeah, but I still don't want to be in a situation where a breakup hurts me more than her. That would give her a great deal of power in the relationship that can be abused. "Give me everything I want even if it hurts you or I'll divorce you" has a bit more weight when she can follow through with t…
/r/ExRedPill28/11/19 07:51 PM
1

Alright, this might sound harsh, and apologies in advance for that, but right now you're traveling down a dangerous black pill road that will only leave you even more bitter and angry in the future. Regardless of whether you believe you have a "reasonable" argument. I've been where you are, and let me tell you that it won't get any better until you do something different. It's always better to believe an uncomfortable truth than a comforting lie. Hence the complaint that most of the folks my age…
/r/ExRedPill28/11/19 12:36 AM
1

Your employment and salary not being a selling point is a GOOD thing. Imagine you lose your job because someone lied about something again, or the company got bankrupt, or your job got automatized. It will not be a problem for your partner, cause she can keep the household afloat while you are looking for the next job. Good thing now that the job thing was never a selling point in the first place, isn't it? I thought the whole point of saying 'it's not a selling point' is to say that it's the ba…
/r/ExRedPill27/11/19 10:00 PM
1

Ok, first of all... You really, really, really, really and I mean really, really...do not want any of Henry's five ex-wives. All of them are whacked in the head. That's all I can imagine. Maybe not his very first, because she perhaps did not know until it is too late. You definitely do not want to be with the one that continued to fuck Henry after the divorce. And my biggest concern is that folks like that might be all that's left at my age. Folks who want the excitement of someone like 'Henry' …
/r/ExRedPill26/11/19 07:09 AM
2

Most women don't want a house husband. In fact, they'd consider him to be a deadbeat.
/r/ExRedPill26/11/19 06:16 AM
2

You said your problem is that you haven't managed to find a wife yet so far, right? And you have tried everything, correct? I tried everything to just get to the starting line. And then I got fired from my job by a lying skip level manager. So, now I've got to spend another full year or getting established in a new job so that I even think of trying to date anyone. I was facing slim pickings when I started, but I'll be 32-33 years old by the time I get there. Everyone who's still single will hav…
/r/ExRedPill26/11/19 05:01 AM
0

I'm not sure that "don't give a damn about your marriage or your spouse" is good marital advice.
/r/ExRedPill26/11/19 03:59 AM
3

Does the Red Pill attitude of "Try to fuck as many 9s and 10s as possible" breed good husbands? No, it doesn't. Nor does the attitude of 'sex, love and relationships shouldn't matter and you should learn to be happy without them'. In all seriousness though, if you want to be a good husband, the first thing I'd suggest is go to work in yourself first. Become the type of person you want to be, the type of person who would make a good husband. Then (and only then) go looking for a female who might …
/r/ExRedPill25/11/19 10:21 PM
3

It is more of a pursuit of your own calling. And what happens if you think your calling is to be a good husband?
/r/ExRedPill25/11/19 09:15 PM
1

Men and women, statistically speaking, typically earn different wages when working the exact same jobs, and even when factoring in job performance. This is not a disputable fact, the data backs it up. That isn't a fact and the data doesn't back that up. Take a look at the CONSAD report on this subject: https://www.shrm.org/hr-today/public-policy/hr-public-policy-issues/Documents/Gender%20Wage%20Gap%20Final%20Report.pdf Men and women do indeed have biological and psychological differences that le…
/r/ExRedPill30/10/19 06:32 AM
1

Imagine that you are a traditionalist woman. You've been saving yourself for marriage and you want a husband who's done the same. Wouldn't you be a hypocrite if you were to condemn a man for wanting the same thing you want? Wouldn't you want someone who valued your efforts and sacrifice?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/19 03:48 AM
0

It's not that women hate romance, they just hate unwanted advances and there just so happens to be no way to know if an advance is unwanted until after it happens. The fact that the kind of men who are able to find romantic success break the rules that the feminists set for everyone else gets a post-hoc rationalization about how it's okay because the feelings were mutual. Your logic is so paranoid it's borderline delusional. I'm not saying this ironically or insultingly, but imho I think you rea…
/r/ExRedPill23/08/19 07:57 AM
-2

How many feminists who say something along the lines of "Your romantic desires make you a pest" do I have to cite to prove my point? Let's get that out of the way before I do all the work to find them and then you move the goalposts on me.
/r/ExRedPill22/08/19 08:06 PM
-4

Remember their handling of the whole Brett Kavanaugh allegations? They pretty much said, "We believe women (not evidence) and thus we'll delete/ban any comments suggesting he's innocent". And how exactly is feminism, as that lable stands today, good for the well-being of men? I mean, take a look at this thread where we keep seeing men talk about being so afraid of offending a woman that they're willing to forgo any chance at love in their life. How is that good for their wellbeing?
/r/ExRedPill22/08/19 06:48 PM
-4

I think /r/Menslib puts getting men to vote Democrat and support feminism above their acctual wellbeing in life.
/r/ExRedPill22/08/19 06:11 PM
-2

Why doesn't this apply to the deizens of /r/MensLib? I men, they ban people for perfectly valid criticisms of feminism.
/r/ExRedPill22/08/19 05:43 PM
5

I don't give a fuck if you think you're privileged or not. The fact remains that the Male Tears meme is targeted at men who are upset at feminism, not depressed or emotional men in general, which was the argument made just a few comments up. Isn't this still hypocritical though? You're still saying that "it's okay for men to display emotion... unless that emotion is in someway critical of feminism".
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/17 05:29 PM
1

That's a big 'if' here. If it works out best for everyone involved then folks would willingly agree to that if there was a default presumption of shared custody. The thing that terrifies me most as a man is being reduced to a beast of burden for someone else's family. Ultimately, that's a consequence of this idea that "you were a good provider while you were married, therefore you must continue to be a good provider after you divorce". No one expects the ex-wife to care for her ex-husband's hous…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/17 03:35 AM
2

I am not going to be so crass as to say dads don't want as much custody as mom, but I think realistically it works out best for everyone when the pre-marital roles stay somewhat constant. And, I don't. Part of the purpose of the marriage is to establish this division of labor between providing for the family and caring for the household. Any such arrangements between the couple in question are made with the idea that they both benefit from each others' sacrifices. Divorce throws this out the win…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/17 04:50 PM
1

How about George W. Bush? Sarah Palin? Condoleezza Rice? Carly Fiorina?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/17 04:23 PM
5

Did you read the comment, though? The whole point is that fathers who do actively fight for custody have the same chances in court as mothers do, as backed up by data. Not really. The sample of men who do litigate isn't randomly distributed among those with custody disputes. It's picked from the men who are most likely to win, or else they wouldn't have even tried it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/17 03:48 PM
1

If there were a 'few', how solid could have they been?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/17 07:30 AM
1

All the feminists telling me that I must never interact with women in public or else I'm sexual harasser has me terrified of interacting with women in public, and ashamed of even having romantic desires. I understand that this isn't entirely logical, that I should simply put their malicious 'advice' aside, but it's surprisingly difficult to unlearn those lessons.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/17 05:25 PM
8

For me, it sounds a bit like The Ant and the Grasshopper. While I was trying to become a good husband, and while I waited and sacrificed towards that end, our hypothetical woman was having 'fun' and making no such investments in the future. Why should I bare the burden that goes along with that?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/17 07:13 PM
1

We've had dovish leaders too. And they have given us 'peace in our time' and appeasement at times too.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/17 05:42 PM
1

That's the justification they give, but actually they should have known what flirting and showing interest is, but due to their narcissistic tendencies they flee into a fantasy world where they are the only true gentleman and hate all the normal guys that are open and honest with their attraction. We also live with the message that being 'open and honest with their attraction' is literally sexual harassment. That talking to women in public makes you a potential rapist. That trying to ask out you…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/17 03:19 AM
3

No one is expected to be happy about rejection Yes we are. Look at all the advice that starts with "learn to be happy alone".
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/17 02:46 AM
4

My point is that feminism does not demand that you sacrifice your personal romantic preferences at its altar. Have you ever seen the feminist reaction to a man saying that he would prefer a virgin bride?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/17 07:02 PM
8

Feminists support men being emotional, men not being afraid to cry or have moments of weekness. *Weakness And, no, they don't. Look up what feminists say about 'emotional labor'.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/17 06:29 PM
2

Or it could be a simple disagreement as to which traits are toxic.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/17 06:25 PM
3

Is it? I mean, when I say that prefer to avoid someone with a sexual history because I think that means that we'd be more likely to divorce, most feminists consider that to be 'slut shaming'.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/17 07:52 PM
3

What about the feminists' complaints about 'slut shaming' and the like? Don't they fall into the same category?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/17 07:09 PM
1

I was referring to the video, not your post.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/17 03:57 AM
1

I get the feeling that he was speaking in such broad generalities so as to be saying very little at all in this video.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/17 06:25 PM
1

Can't this same argument be applied to slut-sharming?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/17 03:48 AM
1

And I've been told that said 'social boundaries' preclude just about everything that can lead to a relationship. Yet, some folks break the rules and profit from it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/17 03:45 AM
1

And this gets to the crux of the issue and why I would prefer someone with the smallest N possible. If it's someone who shares my values, who has avoided sleeping around, then I can safely trust that she's being serious when the physical starts to come up. Otherwise, we're risking a miscommunication where I think that a kiss is the first baby step on the road to marriage and she thinks it's just something casual. Things like that can lead quite a bit of heartbreak.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 02:59 AM
1

I don't think you answered my question... Suppose there's a gal who shares your attitude of 'sometimes its casual and sometimes its not'. Suppose she makes it clear that she's attracted to me one way or another. How do I know if that is just casual or more serious?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 06:34 PM
1

I believe sex can mean something and have also had casual sex. Then, how do your partners know which is which?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 09:03 AM
-2

In other words, learn to be happy with dying alone, having never had a chance to have a marriage or a family. Easier said than done.
/r/ExRedPill10/01/17 04:39 AM
1

No, I'm not!!111!!11One!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/17 10:28 PM
2

In terms of physical attractiveness outside of all other context, I'd say 95%. I can get physically attracted to almost anyone, but that doesn't necessarily mean I will. If you throw in all that context, all that status-seeking I wish to be rid of, or my values around sex and marriage that I'm quite a bit proud of, and the fact that there's a lot of things beyond the physical that matter, that number falls fast.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/17 09:56 PM
1

Okay, so if my interpretation of your comments is correct, you've never made the effort to ask a younger woman out because, in your mind, there are hordes of imaginary people who would disapprove (despite that you, personally, have never had an unpleasant encounter with any of these supposed opinion-holders). I only ever asked out one woman, older or younger... ever. While younger women are the subject of this thread, my fear that my desires are predatory or would be taking advantage of someone …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/17 08:07 AM
1

Is Jessica Valenti not mainstream enough for you? She wrote a whole book on the matter. Since you're making the claim, can you find even a single counterexample?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/17 06:53 AM
1

Let me rephrase this. Outside of the internet, has a real, live human ever called you "evil" or "vile" just for asking another adult out on a date? No, I personally haven't experienced this directed at me. This probably has more to do with the fact that I'm afraid to ask anyone out at all than a sign that it doesn't happen. I have seen milder versions of this, including someone saying that someone should be expelled from a group because he was 'hitting on all the girls'. This goes back to the wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 09:16 PM
2

So if they were real feminists then they wouldn't chastise you for wanting a virgin as long as you want a virgin for the right reasons. No true feminist would say that. Except, when they do. I've seen it argued, time and time again, that the whole idea of purity is evil, that any man who believes in it is an oppressor and that any woman who believes in it is a victim. The feminists are in favor of sexual freedom for for people like them. Sure, they'll make room for someone who's 'asexual', but t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 06:07 AM
2

I've never heard anyone call someone "evil" or "vile" just for being socially awkward. You're either deluded or exaggerating. Evil is the kind of word you use to describe someone who sets orphanages on fire, not someone who asks another 18-years-or-older adult out on a date. I've seen it plenty of times: https://captainawkward.com/2012/08/11/the-c-word/ http://www.doctornerdlove.com/2014/03/socially-awkward-isnt-an-excuse/ And so on. I could go on, but things like this really do get to be upsett…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 05:13 AM
1

The problem is that each all but the last of those is extremely subjective. How do you know if they want to talk to you? Short of them saying something along the lines of "I don't want to talk to you", the answer is completely ambitious. How do you judge 'reciprocating the amount of effort you're putting in'? The things I hear suggested on these points boil down to reading minds, or trying to infer things that don't really follow from unrelated behavior. It really is that complicated. And, if yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 02:56 AM
2

All too often this turns into something like this: "I want to ask her out, but I'm not really sure if she's interested. Because of that, I have to assume she isn't interested and I have no business even thinking of being interested in her". Since you can never really be sure, you're never in a place where you can ethically ask anyone out.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 02:11 AM
3

What if your new year's resolution is to not make a new year's resolution?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/17 07:17 PM
1

I'm a man in tech in the greater bay area... And I would prefer to find a virgin bride. There's just no politically correct way of saying that, and very few women who accept that. I have a hard enough time with courtship as it is. Although, I'd agree with the point that "frat boys", "pro athletes" "drug dealers" (seriously, where is that a high status occupation at all?) and "club promoters" are not necessarily at the apex of desirability across all cultures.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/17 06:28 PM
6

I am a guy, I fucked around a lot, I have highly feminist views, strongly feminist female friends... I have never ONCE been shamed for my masculinity or my sexuality. Because your sexuality is perfectly in line with the feminist ideals of free love and the sexual revolution. Try saying that you are seeking a virgin bride and see how your feminist friends react.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 09:35 PM
1

Your claim they "NEVER work out" goes against statistics that show the divorce rates aren't even close to 100% for women with X amount of previous partners. Your very own source says this: Women with 0-1 partners were the least likely to divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:35 PM
5

There a higher risk of divorce in households where the wife out-earns the husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 01:27 AM
1

Where did that come from? Right there, in your previous post: ...just about the best that we can hope to do is minimize their social "voice" and wait for them to age out of the population and have trouble passing on their lack-of-values to their children. Right. Do you feel that feminists laughing among themselves at the ridiculousness of misogynist accusations (in exactly the same way as atheists laugh among themselves about that silly "baby eater" meme), is wishing you pain or death? More broa…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 05:42 AM
1

We're not, though. Manosphere types were never going to be allies anyway; That really doesn't matter. "Not wishing pain and death on you opponents" is what I would consider basic decency. do is minimize their social "voice" Again, if the shoe was on the other foot, you'd call this marginalization. And you'd be right.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 05:38 PM
2

It's annoying, unproductive, and unjustifiably self-centered. And how exactly is this different than the modern feminist movement? What makes your complaints valid and your opponent's mere whining?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 03:52 AM
2

Yet when other feminists mock male tears, they mock your whining, they're not mocking our right to express emotions. What is the difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 03:49 AM
2

I've already explained what feminists mean by male tears once today, and who they're talking to. Here is a decent explanation of the meme, what it means, and how it's used, if you're curious to understand something you obviously don't currently understand. I thought you folks had a saying about this... Something involving intent and magic? While I've never been a fan of that line of argument, it does seem like something of a double standard. I mean, your side often says that ironic sexism is sti…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 03:48 AM
2

The fact that you now have the luxury of being able to show sensitivity and do anything other than pretend to be a one-dimensional stereotype is in large part due to social progress brought about by feminism. Is this the same feminism that loves mocking "male tears" and decrying "virgin neckbeard losers"?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/16 06:31 PM
1

There are several examples in this thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/16 05:52 PM
6

Judging by much what I've read on Reddit (yes, I know, not necessarily a representative sample) the overwhelming majority of women wouldn't marry someone who's ever seen a prostitute.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/16 12:23 AM
1

nah, not "unless the guy is hot." its more like "unless its consensual." Of course, asking for consent is offensive sexual harassment in a work environment. As is asking for consent to ask for consent. And so on. Which leaves us in a bit of a pickle.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/16 05:46 PM
2

If you put reasonable constraints on the definition of feminism-- like "thinks sexism currently exists" and "agrees with other feminists about issues that are controversial in 2016, like, ever"-- then neither one is. Then, you cannot claim that feminism is simply opposition to sexism or "the simple idea that women are people".
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/16 07:39 PM
3

I'm not sure I agree with point 2, but perhaps I see PPD as being a bit broader than just being related to TRP. I do see a big point of this forum centering around just how politics and culture effect our approach to dating, courtship, relationships and casual sex. TRP itself is just one collection of ideas in this space.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/16 02:41 AM
3

The problem with a lot of the gender role divide is that they're not based on actual differences between the genders or are no longer relevant. I'm okay with acknowledging factually proven and confirmed gender differences, but not what some random dude Bob thinks is the difference between men and women. I don't really care what Bob believes no matter how much he thinks he's right. The road to "factually proven and confirmed gender differences" starts with "some random dude Bob thinks is the diff…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/16 06:58 PM
1

I'm a software engineer. I studied computer science. I can make music. I can make code. How many gender studies, ethnic studies or business administration students can make either?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/16 06:01 PM
3

A disease-free slut brings no harm to the community. Except for things like divorce, infidelity and out-of-wedlock births.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/16 10:17 PM
2

I want a world where the rules allow me to at least try to court and marry someone. I get the feeling that the sum total of "Don't talk to strangers in public, it's creepy" and "don't try to date your friends, it's proof that you just want to use them for sex" is "Nothing is permitted". Every relationship had to start with someone violating one of those rules. This isn't about demanding access to everyone's pants. This is me wishing I was allowed to even try to find a lasting relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/16 06:52 PM
2

And, let's take the odd analogy a step further. Let's say that there's a group out there lobbying to make all traffic lights continuously red and displaying a stop signal. Some people would protest that this makes getting from point a to point b impossible. The proponents respond that it isn't their job to get from point a to point be and that the rule of the road shouldn't be set up to enable that. Of course, in places where they get this rule established, there are people who simply ignore the…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/16 06:04 PM
1

The other side is that people who are fired for cause or quit without a good reason do not get paid out - that is reasonable, and it might be fair to stretch that to divorce laws as well. This is fundamentally the policy I want. As it is, the law punishes me for trying to be a good husband regardless of who decides to initiate the divorce and why. I don't like the idea that I should be forced to continue to be a provider for someone who has walked out on their side of the agreement without cause…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/16 08:00 AM
2

Isn't that the whole point of the abundance mentality, to convince yourself to not invest too much in a relationship because 'anybody else will do', or at least 'many others will do'? Aren't all relationships or indeed all interactions a means to an end, where you trade what you want for what the other person is willing to offer? Again, even with the re-wording, I'm not seeing the distinction here.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/16 07:30 AM
1

What's so special about bars and clubs? What makes them unique among situations?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/16 06:54 AM
3

assuming that someone can easily be swapped or exchanged for another model with the same attributes (fungibility). In other words, the "abundance mentality"?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/16 06:52 AM
0

Honestly, Timothy McVay could use a similar justification for blowing up the Oklahoma City Federal Building. His ideological brethren had been burned alive in Waco and shot at Ruby ridge and with no justice in sight, he had to take matters into his own hands.... Or we can accept that rule of law forbids that. "They had it coming" isn't good justification for murder and insanity should only apply if they really cannot tell right from wrong, which isn't the case here. What you describe is vigilant…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/16 02:45 AM
1

But, if you try to do something about it, you're sexist and entitled for demanding that women and society as a whole change.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/16 01:49 AM
1

You fight to end or flee from the threat. If someone slaps me and runs away, it's not self defense to give chase. If they continue slapping me, I have to assume they intend to escalate the violence and they (or their friends) may be armed.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/16 01:15 AM
2

Your goal is to free yourself from the attacker. This may involve beating them to death, drawing a concealed handgun and shooting them, or more likely freeing yourself from them and running to gain some range, observers and fighting space. The point remains unchanged, if someone attacks you on the street, your life is in danger and you have every right to defend it with whatever force you can muster. One only hopes that your attacker realizes that whatever reason they had to attack you wasn't wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/16 11:09 PM
2

Because the alternative is 'every fight ends in unconsciousness or death' which is definitely not the case If someone attacks you on the street, you have to assume that this is the case. There's every possibility that they have a concealed gun, knife or club and that they will intend to use it. You have no way of knowing otherwise. All street fights are fights to the death with an armed opponent until proven otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/16 11:01 PM
3

I can give an example of a feminist saying that it's morally justified for women to kill their their husbands in their sleep.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/16 08:56 PM
1

If such an arrangement was set up ahead of time, the breadwinner does not get to repudiate it in the case of divorce. You cannot shift the markers for contributing to marriage according to what benefits you at the time. But, the homemaker... does? Ultimately, alimony means that the provider is required (under force of law) to continue providing, while the homemaker can simply walk away from their responsibilities without penalty. To switch the genders - I am (was) acquainted with two couples whe…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/16 08:16 PM
1

My biggest problem is probably differences in ethics when it comes to courtship. I'm still playing with a largely traditionalist rulebook in a world that seems to punish such values. I'd go a step further and say that following "normie" advice makes courtship utterly impossible. And the Red Pill's goals are completely opposed what I consider ethical. I can point to dozens of pieces of mainstream advice that add up to be an impossible situation. First, is "Don't date your friends". Let's consider…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/16 08:41 AM
1

How's one of these supposed to help?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/16 04:54 AM
5

Everyone has a list of traits and behaviors they want in a partner. Everyone has a list of traits and behaviors they're willing to offer. Every relationship is essentially a trade where both sides both give and receive their companionship, labor, and yes, their sexuality, among other things. With me so so far? Some traits or behaviors are more in demand than others. More women want someone who's over 6' tall than someone who isn't. This means that men who are taller than 6' tall have more choice…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/16 04:14 PM
1

While this isn't quite a straw-man, I don't think it addresses the bulk of why someone would want a virgin bride. If you live in a world where sex happens without any intent of marriage, you don't have to compromise between traits you find attractive for a short-term relationship and and traits you wish to find in a future spouse. Human nature being what is is, most folks will focus on short term pleasure over making a sacrifice today to have a better relationship in the future If you're a 'beta…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/16 08:38 AM
5

The fact is that sex is very often a mutually beneficial thing for both men and women rather than the zero sum tug of war you have outlined above. Your outlook is limited, but reality is not. This doesn't preclude an economic-minded analysis. Nearly all trade is considered mutually beneficial if the partners involved enter the deal knowingly and willingly.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/16 08:17 AM
1

Context: http://slatestarcodex.com/2014/08/31/radicalizing-the-romanceless/
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/16 02:25 AM
2

How do you define these boundaries? What do you consider polite? Why? Under the rules that you define for courtship, is there anything a man can do to express interest that doesn't scare you ("I'm scared of men I don't know in general"?) or is impolite?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/16 10:01 PM
3

You didn't really answer the question though. You've given an anecdote or two, but you haven't explained why that behavior is creepy and disrespectful and whatnot. It's your reasoning I'm interested in, not further details about what you find creepy, but why you find it creepy.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/16 09:43 PM
7

Addressing anti-feminism specifically? She's mocking Scot Aaronson for expressing emotional pain when talking about his difficulties with courtship. If you find that to be acceptable, you argument is basically "it's good that feminists mock and belittle men who show emotional vulnerability". You're basically proving the OP's point.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/16 09:39 PM
2

Amanda Marcotte certainly qualifies as a big-name feminist. And she most certainly also engages in the same sort of things.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/16 09:21 PM
7

When you push them about their reasoning behind such condemnations, it always boils down to "men feeling desire is bad". When you read things like this, which literally says that you shouldn't talk to women in public or else you're a potential rapist, what message are we supposed to take away from this? If we're condemned for feeling absolutely terrified of courtship, if we're told that our desires are inherently oppressive, what conclusion are we supposed to draw? No, these condemnations are no…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/16 09:17 PM
10

And just what kind of people have been teaching the message that romantic interest is creepy and predatory?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/16 06:36 PM
3

How many examples can you point to of prominent feminists criticizing the 'lol nice guys' and 'lol male tears' crowd? While you're right in saying that no ideology is a monolith, it seems that most of the feminist's ideological standard bearers are very firmly in support of kicking men who are already down. While they might not speak for everyone, the level of support and the lack of criticism that they get indicates that they speak for a lot of feminists. So, while you're point is fair as far a…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/16 06:35 PM
2

Talking to girls is appropriate. Flirting with them is appropriate. Being a romantic fella is appropriate. Not according to the feminists it isn't
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/16 07:15 PM
3

Thanks for the history lesson. But I'm not dismissing anyone, nor is me saying, "Hey, you sound like you're depressed, you should get help," actually intended to be dismissive, it's intended to be helpful. Honestly, given my own life experiences in this area, I don't think this helpful advice. Going to a therapist will not help anything, but it's a great way to get a label and record that follows you around. The presence of these does a great job of giving people a reason to pre-judge you in a l…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/16 08:28 AM
2

The "SMP" is another absurd relation. Sex is not- except in obvious cases- a commodity and treating it as such gives you a very warped view of intimate relationships which, again, is pretty fucking far removed from reality. Whining betas? Sure, some guys are whining about how they can't get laid. Guys have been whining about how they can't get laid for aeons, what else is new? Monopolizing alphas? Again, the idea that alphas "monopolize" women is just flat out untrue. Most everyone is having sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/16 06:33 AM
3

And it's stuff like this that is frustrating to read. You guys sound like you have serious depression and need a therapist, but you expect every person to be your therapist. You know, allegations of mental illness were often used to suppress dissidents in the Soviet Union. It's a tactic used to dismiss any complaints that the person might have. Imagine parent telling their child that they're not feeling bad because of the parent's threats to disown them, but because of a mental illness that the …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/16 06:05 AM
2

Your misery would be fine, if you would stop expressing it in such toxic, terrible and vile ways. The problem is not with women, the problem is not with society, the problem is not with "chads", it is with yourselves- which some, even most of you, seem to recognize. Good, recognize it, work to change it, or don't- but don't pretend like all your unhappiness can be laid at the foot of society as a whole, and if you want to blame society for your problems don't complain when "society" turns around…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/16 05:11 AM
2

They seek nothing more than the genocide of incels, and subs like /r/niceguys and the BluePiller are specifically devoted to this task. While the OP bring up some valid points, this line jumps the shark. Words are words. Bullets are bullets. And Genocide is Genocide. Yes, there's a #killallmen hashtag on Twitter, but of those who actually are not being ironic, how many are anywhere close to political power? Members of their political tribe occasionally commit acts of political violence big and s…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/16 03:41 AM
1

I don't mean to be too critical of your comment, but I skimmed the Mark Regnerus article and found some pretty RP ideas so I went ahead and googled him. According to Wiki, he is kind of a rogue psychoanalyst that has been disowned by his peers. In 2012 he did a study on homosexuality that led to over 200 of his colleagues petitioning the Social Science research committee citing " concern "about the academic integrity of the peer review process for this paper as well as its intellectual merit."" …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/16 04:15 PM
0

There have been studies that show a huge drop off in the rate of divorce if a woman gets married after 24 I wonder if this has more to do with the age of the men that they are marrying. And even to the extent that this is true, getting married at 24 means taking courtship seriously at 21, if not sooner. By then you're more settled into your career so less financial obstacles, more mature so you have realistic expectations of your partner, and you hopefully have enough life experience to know wha…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/16 07:55 AM
1

The traditionalists are not claiming tolerance as an unquestionable virtue though. They believe that their worldview creates better outcomes for everyone involved, and thus, folks are harming themselves and others by sleeping around. The sex-positive crowd, on the other hand, does claim that tolerance is an unquestionable virtue... Right up until someone says how they would prefer their future spouse to be a virgin, in which case they're doing the whole evil judgment thing. Neither side is reall…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/16 07:08 AM
1

But, what if all you really want to do is to get married?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/16 03:42 AM
3

Try being a traditionalist who's seeking a virgin bride on there and see how tolerant they are. I've distinctly seen a commenter brag about how she wants to 'dance on my grave' to great approval of their community.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/16 08:45 AM
6

Oh, there's plenty of hate there. Only difference is to whom it is directed.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/16 06:07 AM
2

But do such interviews still depend on self-reporting?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/16 04:29 AM
2

Okay: Counterpoint: you're an ugly virgin in a fedora. +16 Bluepill is not a counterpoint; it exists only to point and laugh at walking talking garbage like you :) Nice rage post btw; your (very thinly) veiled anger is what we are all about! Thanks for coming, please exit through the gift shop for your complimentary official Bluepill fedora/crying rag combo! +11 Hear, hear. I hope all those poor women fly the coop the second there's an opportunity. Take these abusive, exploiting sacks of refuse …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/16 10:13 PM
5

Also you haven't mentioned things like "creep-shaming" and attacking men who approach women. Because I don't see this as being a gendered problem. As a woman who spent some years ugly, I can assure you that unattractive women are shamed just as brutally by men when they show interest. Women with nice bodies and homely faces are called "butterface", the largest girl in a group of friends is "the DUFF", when a wingman goes for the "ugly friend" he's taking one for the team, "falling on the grenade…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/16 04:22 AM
1

sexual objectification is when someone is see solely as a sex object without a personality or humanizing characteristics. Doesn't 'sex object' generally imply 'human'? Nobody is sleeping with robots (yet). This is harder to see, especially for RP leaning people. I hope most people will agree with me that women have personalities and metal attributes that are attractive. When you strip away those attributes and seek girls solely based on physical attributes its a form of objectification. Both men…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/16 04:52 PM
3

What's the difference? Seriously, I have never heard a workable definition that reliably differentiates between desire and objectification.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/16 04:51 PM
1

There is nothing I would want more than that. Like or not, I think I'm ethically obligated to get as close to that ideal as I can. Such is part of the sacrifice of being good spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/16 06:53 AM
1

Very few people tell males to remain chaste or to not to sleep around. They actually feel proud of sleeping around. Your point is blown already. In a word: Bullcon. Nearly every traditionalist I've read who argues for chastity says that the same applies for men as it does for women. All the many, many women who think they "don't like sex" because they were taught that "good women" don't masturbate and they didn't explore their own sexuality and so they end up in marriages with dead bedrooms - is…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/16 04:31 AM
1

Why would anyone support the concept of virginity in this day and age? Because there's benefits to controlling both male and female sexuality. There's quite a bit of evidence that having many partners makes it harder to commit to just one. Since commitment is a social good that provides for stable families to raise children and build communities, this is something that cultures are generally right to encourage. This isn't to say that the ends always justify the means: Some means of encouraging g…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/16 04:45 AM
7

So, let's assume that this is true. What population is it measureing? Only those who were trying to 'hook up'? Only those who successfully 'hooked up' at least once'? I very highly doubt that this applies to the whole population. Widespread monogomany makes that kindof tough, and I'm not sure that poly relationship folks break down like this either. The other question is, "is this the same top N% responsible for K% of hookups in a given period?". In other words, is the same population of 'top' m…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/15 02:06 AM
1

So is this the female equivalent of 'truck nuts'? Meh, the Daisy one actually looks pretty cool. Speak for yourselves if that is "manproof".
/r/MensRights26/08/14 03:31 AM
1

I was going to say that this survey doesn't seem too scientific in it's wording of questions...
/r/MensRights26/08/14 02:57 AM
1

Only the TREFs could insert misandry a woman's choice to sleep with another woman.
/r/MensRights25/07/14 10:15 PM
0

Honestly, dumping this on someone at the start of a business trip and cutting contact afterwards isn't nice, nor is it productive. This isn't to hold her blameless: A failure to communicate requires two. But, I'm going to say his actions were a good thing.
/r/MensRights25/07/14 09:58 PM
1

I'm afraid I haven't.
/r/MensRights25/07/14 09:57 PM
3

There's nothing wrong with wanting to convict more rapists. There's something very wrong with violating the rules of due process to do so.
/r/MensRights10/07/14 01:39 AM
3

They're right. It's not specifically an MRA issue either way. MRA's personally may take either a pro-life or pro-choice stance, but nothing about being an MRA requires you to take one view over the other. Isn't that an acknowledgement of what they wanted? They (as a whole) always say that abortion is a women's issue. They often go so far as to say that men shouldn't get a vote when it comes to abortion policy. Isn't a lack of an MRA stance on the matter consistent with that desire?
/r/MensRights17/06/14 09:34 AM
8

You guys do not like to be generalized as violent and hyper-sexualized and yet I see in many of these posts women are generalized as manipulative and emotionally unstable. I personally do not think either way is a healthy way of viewing another group of people and would not think a serious feminist would generalize a group of men like that. Are people on MRA who generalize women like this on the fringe or the majority? The most visible instances of that happening don't seem to be coming from MRA…
/r/MensRights05/06/14 10:28 AM
3

It's just a metaphor. I have nothing against homosexuals. Well, heterosexuals in this case. We are ultimately talking about a woman penetrating a men, which is a heterosexual act. In any case, I do think that this particular metaphor is shaming men who enjoy this particular sexual activity. Besides, I'm 100% FOR traditional gender roles. I believe they're a good thing. They've served us well for millions of years. People have been brainwashed into thinking gender roles are bad. The fact is, men …
/r/MensRights28/05/14 05:48 AM
2

Is there any policy you specifically object to that is supported by male feminists? In my view, there are lots of issues that are common to both the MRAs and the feminists. They tend to get a little less play around here, in part because controversy sells and in part because the feminists have more power anyways. By all mean, we shouldn't let some misguided sense of ideological purity cause us to reject someone like Christina Hoff Sommers because she identifies as a 'feminist'. Nor should we be …
/r/MensRights28/05/14 04:43 AM
2

In which case, we have to include "feminist" efforts in countries where women really do have it significantly worse off. Think Pakistan, Afghanistan... Places like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/14 08:48 AM
2

Clearly when Christina Hoff Sommers wrote The War Against Boys she was Mansplaining, using her superior position as a... oh... wait.
/r/MensRights21/05/14 07:29 PM
3

Wow, an enlightening if old piece. I wonder what, if anything, has changed since it was written?
/r/MensRights14/05/14 10:18 AM
2

That's correct, I'm not the OP and I bit of a detractor from that claim. My claim is that, while there are population wide differences that might effect the success of a startup, it's generally not possible to say that a specific company was or was not successful due to the gender makeup of it's leadership.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/14 08:59 PM
1

Regardless, do you really think these successes are because of male management? No... The claim I'm challenging is that Facebook and Amazon are somehow completely unique. The same era spawned similar competitors to all of the companies I mentioned.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/14 06:54 PM
1

The counterexample to that is Myspace. Or maybe Nokia and HP when it comes to mobile. Poor engineering and/or mismanagement will doom you, even if you are in the right place at the right time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/14 03:18 AM
1

We have Bing. We have Myspace and Google+. We have MSNBC. We have E-Bay/Samsung/Google (but, it does take a combination of the above to to be capture the breadth of Amazon). Just as Ford had (and still has) GM, Chrysler, and other competitors. Just because others entered the market, or even created the market, doesn't mean the truly out-of-this-world success that each of these companies
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/14 02:23 AM
1

Correlation does not necessarily imply causation. It could be that there's a confounding variable here. In this case, I think it's tech. Suppose that we had introduced home Internet in the mid 1960's, when computing was more gender balanced than it is now. An Amazon of that day might have been recruiting the likes of Grace Murry Hopper as a COO/CTO and the overall gender ratio of Amazon's top executives might be much different. This isn't to say that there are not gender differences in how we go…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/14 12:02 AM
1

That said, both of these companies are extreme outliers whose success was only possible at a certain time in history. I don't think you can draw conclusions about such small sample sizes. You can say the same about Ford, Intel, Microsoft, Google, EMD, Yahoo, News Corp... and so many others. I'd argue that most major companies could have only had had success at their certain point in history.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/14 11:56 PM
2

The thing is, it applies no matter where you are on the ideological spectrum. "MRAs Suck" is banned just as much as "Feminists suck".
/r/MensRights21/04/14 05:01 PM
1

/r/videos specifically forbids political content. That does include Men's rights.
/r/MensRights21/04/14 01:10 PM
1

It's telling that there's a feminist campaign to "ban bossy" and make other sweeping changes to culture and the behavior of men to benefit women and girls, but it's unacceptable to ask women to make similar changes. Feminists tell us to be attracted to women regardless of their body type, wealth or power. Who's telling women to be attracted to men regardless of their display of emotions, wealth or power?
/r/MensRights18/04/14 11:52 PM
1

This strikes me as a contradiction. One moment, you state that there are folks who will accept even my 'negative' emotions, the next you say display of such things is a sign of 'an unpleasantly clingy personality' and a sign that 'you make a worthless partner'. You can't really have it both ways. Either that kind of openness is the sign of a healthy relationship, or it makes me a horrible, worthless person, but it can't be both at the same time. Where the "rejecting promiscuous liars" thing come…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/14 09:35 AM
2

maybe you'll be one of the many people that actually DO end up with someone that's really great for you. And, maybe I'll win the lottery. That doesn't mean I can stop worrying about money before then. Nor does it make it a good retirement strategy. The fact of the matter is a man displaying too much these 'negative' emotions, particularly early in courtship, is a death sentence to most romantic relationship. I don't like it, but it's the way of the world. Why else does so much dating advice that…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/14 11:22 AM
3

Their entire philosophy demands that a man become and remain a macho male stereotype. Try this: "Their entire philosophy states that the real world demands that a man become and remain a macho male stereotype.". It's a subtle, but important difference. The real world is often a very depressing place, but reality makes not adjustments to our feelings. Are they right? I'm starting to be afraid that they are. I've seen the disgust on women's faces when I cry. I, and so many others, have been pushed…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/14 12:20 PM
4

TRP being a huge advocate of them (including men not having feelings). They don't quite see it like that. They simply say, "Women will reject you for seeking emotional support. That is part of their nature, you can't expect them to be any different. Deal with it.". They don't make make a value judgment either way beyond suggesting that it's foolish to to expect women to behave in a way that is inconsistent with what Redpill followers view as their inherent nature. Regardless if you agree with th…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/14 10:35 AM
5

Can confirm, this is a repost. And not a particularly interesting one at that.
/r/MensRights29/03/14 05:26 AM
3

I would support SB 967 if there were three changes made: Remove the mention of preponderance of evidence Explicitly give students the right to council Explicitly forbid the use of sex, gender or gender identity in identifying the aggressor in any circumstance.
/r/MensRights04/03/14 12:14 AM
19

Selection Bias. Those people who are happy with their lives, happy with how dating and courtship are working, happy with their role in a relationship generally don't go out seeking advice on those matters. You only go seeking such things if you are already angry or disillusioned with the way things are going for you. Hence, most people who are not dire and are not angry do not seek out anything related to the "Red Pill".
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/14 09:39 AM
2

Is it just me, or did this article not really take sides? It was merely saying "This guy said something, these other people disagree." as far as I can tell.
/r/MensRights12/02/14 07:05 PM
2

I'm in the US and the vaccine was covered by my insurance here. I thought that the ACA required them to cover it in the US.
/r/MensRights02/02/14 06:00 AM
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