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verytiredcatto Archive

View 0 posts and 26 comments by verytiredcatto on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

What problems did approaching men cause you?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/22 06:38 AM
1

I’m curious, what are some things that you’d change about marriage?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/22 12:43 PM
2

I was with a ex before and she always wanted me to lead and take charge. It made me really uncomfortable as well because I don’t want to have that much control over someone’s life. It’s also just nice to have someone look after you sometimes and you can switch that part of your brain off and let them handle things.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/22 01:29 AM
1

Glad you found it interesting. I definitely feel like a lot of parents are being put in a really hard spot because you’re told if you stop your child from medically transitioning it’s child abuse. Hope everything is good with you. Thanks for listening!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/22 12:19 AM
1

Thank you! It’s been quite the journey but I’m very happy to be where I am. I can’t speak to all trans peoples experiences, but I do think there are a lot of trans people who are in a similar place to me but haven’t been able to get out the situation. I think more than would admit could have found happiness without transitioning. Trans people generally consider being trans an innate identity and nothing can change it so there is a lot of resistance to the idea you can overcome gender dysphoria a…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 11:24 PM
1

Oh god, how can I explain this shortly. Basically, I thought I was trans and transitioned in the relationship. It lasted for four years and we tried to make it work (she even proposed to me) but we weren’t happy together. Since we broke up, I eventually realized due to growth that I no longer needed to transition to be happy so I detransitioned and am back at square one in the dating game. Excited to get back out there as a man though.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 09:51 PM
1

Fair enough. I don’t really care if people consider me alpha or not, I was just curious how you’d think of me given my traits. Most of my female friends are bisexual themselves and seem to peruse men like me so maybe I’ll do well with them but not straight hetero typical women.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 08:13 PM
2

I’m not entirely sure if I agree with your terminology but I do see your point. I’d be curious what you think of me. I’d actually describe myself as being feminine for a man. I’m very much a feminist, and am open and vulnerable with my emotions. I’ve always connected with women better than men because we can be emotionally open with each other. But I also have a lot of the alpha traits you describe. I work in management, organize public events and communities, and I love to lead. I have no probl…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 07:57 PM
9

If I’ve learned anything on the internet, it’s to not take people’s own self assetments seriously. Just from chatting with some people here I think lots of people don’t realize how poor their communication skills are, or how unempathetic they seem to be. Like, just the fact so many people here are like “all women” are like this, or “all men” are like this shows some problematic thought patterns.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 07:34 PM
10

I’m super nerdy and actually meet a lot of women who are similar. You just have to get into the right spaces to meet those women. It is more competitive since the ratio of men to women is in favour of men, but it’s still very much possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 07:31 PM
6

I don’t like using the term beta, but I do think you describe a certain type of man that’s real. I’ve dated this kind of man (I’m a bi man) and it’s really challenging to maintain attraction to them. The things I find attractive about men that aren’t as important for my attraction towards women are drive, leadership, and being able to take control of a situation. From talking to women, they’re often looking for similar things. I believe men can develop these skills, I know I did.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 07:20 PM
1

I agree women care about appearance but meeting the appearance standards of women are a lot easier than the other way around. Most women just want a man who’s clean, can put together an outfit, and has some level of self grooming. I think you can also (whether fair or not) make pretty good assumptions about men based on their appearance. If they dress like a slob, and looks unclean they’re probably a slob in the rest of their life. I don’t think this is as true for women, nor do men care. My ex …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 07:15 PM
1

Yeah, you don’t want to continue to feel shame. Part of growth is accepting yourself for who you are now and before. I made a lot of stupid choices in my younger years but at the time I did the best I could with the knowledge I had. I accept my current self and my current mistakes, but also recognize that learning from those experiences has a lot to value.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:47 PM
2

Having a growth mindset is really important. I’m always looking to do better, not because I hate myself, but because growing is a powerful thing to do and not something you should ever give up.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:38 PM
2

Because admitting there is a problem means showing weakness, admitting you’re not perfect. A lot of people’s sense of self is built up on this idea they can do no wrong so it’s really hard to admit you could have done better. Men are socialized to never show weakness because if you do it’s hard against you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:28 PM
2

I’ve had to try a few therapists before finding the right fit so understand. Maybe there are so asshole therapists out there but the overwhelming experience I’ve heard is they are professional and try to help you. I know having trust issues can make it hard but if you want to work on those issues you have to open up. It’s the only way forward.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:26 PM
1

When I said “you’re” I was talking about a general man, not you specifically. Apologies, didn’t mean it to be an attack on you. I think the reasons for men not taking mental health serious vary. I’d say the one common theme I see is men not admitting there is a problem, or thinking they can solve their issues without therapy. I know, I was there myself before and didn’t realize how much internal hurt I was going through until I took off the plaster I was covering it up with.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:22 PM
0

I’m well aware. I was treated terribly for most of my life by my parents and was constantly bullied at school. I had no self esteem by the time I was 18 but knew how important working on that would be. Im 31 one now and it was a long journey and one I’m still going down. To be frank though, I see a lot of men too scared to even acknowledge they have something to work on. I also know lots of men who have done the work and it’s paid off. You put in the work you see the benefits - it’s pretty simpl…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:19 PM
1

I definitely think it can be more difficult for women sometimes. One thing I enjoy about dating as a man is you get to take the initiative. As a man, I can choose to approach women and ask them out, whereas most women can’t do the same (for various reasons). Whether you think that’s good or not is besides the point, men just fundamentally have more autonomy when it comes to selecting potential partners because of our societal roles.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:11 PM
8

Having rejected both men and women before, you’re right. It’s a little awkward at first but you move on quickly. Getting rejected myself has been so much harder.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:06 PM
-5

If you’re too incompetent to handle socialization and are afraid of guilt than do some therapy. Own your mental health just like your physical health. More men need to look after their mental health better.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:04 PM
0

I dunno. Women have standards these days, I wouldn’t say they’re unfairly high. When you meet a woman who has standards you meet, dating is super easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 06:08 PM
3

Honestly, most straight mens profiles are total garbage. I’ve seen myself and I’d say 80-90% have nothing to interest a person unless you find them attractive in the photo.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 05:08 PM
10

Being nice and respectful are great attributes, but they’re boring attributes. I do think men and women are attracted to people who are exciting and interesting. You need to show women they can have fun with you. Playfully teasing women is a great way to build chemistry but I would not call that nice or respectful behaviour, persay.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 05:04 PM
0

I don’t know whether that person in the video had surgery or not, but as someone attracted to womens bodies there is a difference between thick and fat. I really doubt all the thick women I see have had BBLs.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/22 04:37 PM
1

Maybe it’s “harder” but I would rather much be in the position of being the person who pursues, you just have more control over the situation and who you go after. Being a woman in dating is inherently more passive (not saying it should be that way). I guess maybe for OLD it evens out more but for IRL dating I’d rather be the guy everyday of the week. Asking girls out isn’t scary.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/22 12:58 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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