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View 1 post and 54 comments by wasitmethewholetime on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
31

SEEKING ADVICEwasitmethewholetime/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/20 06:51 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Okay. You seem like a really absolutely heartless person so I’m done engaging with you in any way now.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/20 04:02 PM
1

The fact that she has cancer and the fact that he cheated on and abandoned her and is now pulling some shady shit by not paying the credit card and allowing the payments to be pulled from his military retirement account which will reduce the amount of money in an account she’s entitled to is very relevant and will most definitely be taken into account by the court. Not to mention, just reading the situation, any human being would have some compassion for this woman. Do you not have any human dec…
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/20 03:46 PM
1

She has cancer and has been abandoned by her husband. You found like a truly awful human being.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/20 03:07 PM
2

That’s what you took out of this?? 🤔 Is she still in active treatment for cancer? She’s seen a lawyer but has she retained one? She needs to get legal counsel ASAP.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/20 07:17 PM
10

If you can prove it’s debt she created without your knowledge and wasn’t spent on anything that would better the home/marriage/you, hopefully your lawyer can make a good case for her taking responsibility for all of it. Were the cards in your name too? How did she hide the bills?
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/20 07:38 PM
2

Dude, you sound paranoid. Your ex cannot make up a nonexistent person and claim that you were not a stay at home dad. If there was no nanny, there was no nanny. There will be no evidence of a nanny, therefore it will not stand up in court. Honestly, it sounds crazy.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/20 02:22 AM
1

There is something fishy about this situation. You cannot just make up a person who doesn’t exist and have a “slip past” experts. Obviously if she made up a nanny who does not exist, that’s going to be found out in court. This is the real world, not some lifetime movie. If she can’t produce the nanny or any record of the nanny ever existing and no one has ever seen this person, what are you so worried about?
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/20 01:06 AM
3

No offense, but if she can’t produce payments to a nanny or the nanny herself to testify that she did in fact provide services or documentation used to hire the nanny or Service used to find a nanny or pictures of the nanny, then no court is going to believe there was a nanny. Who is your wife, Casey fucking Anthony?
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/20 09:01 PM
1

It’ll still be different living apart finally and there will likely be a range of emotions.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/20 03:46 PM
3

She’s responding with arrogance/defensiveness because it’s a projection of guilt. You’re responding with anger as a projection of hurt. This is a confusing and awful time, breaking up but still living together. The next step, breaking up and being apart, will be hard in a different way. Eventually it’ll get easier, but divorce just fucking sucks, no matter what. Sorry, hang in there.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/20 03:37 PM
2

Who initiated?
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/20 02:50 PM
0

A lot of strong women gave me words of encouragement and advice on this thread. Women who didn’t need to “act like a male” to present strength.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 12:12 AM
1

For the love of God. A piece of paper (divorce decree) that will ultimately put me in insurmountable debt is not liberating myself. I’m liberated already because I’m detached and not chasing a man who abandoned me. Thanks for the support. I’ll take your suggestion and move on from this sub now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/20 06:57 PM
1

Look, I don’t know who you are, or why you’re so hell-bent on telling me I’m doing this wrong. But what you are suggesting with opening the joint account and putting my debt in his name doesn’t even fucking make sense because if it’s a joint account it’s in both of our names, not just his. So I still owe it and it still affects my credit when it doesn’t get paid. And opening accounts in his name alone is literally illegal. SO easy to say you’re a badass when you’re not the one actually dealing w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/20 06:50 PM
1

Wow you’ve obviously never tried to get divorced with NO financial resources. This is not female empowerment, this is straight “your story makes me mad and here’s how I would behave if it w ere me, and since you’re not behaving in the way that I believe that I would behave, you’re wrong and you’re behaving like a victim.“ I did everything I could in my situation and then my situation got worse. Cancer is draining and now I am doing everything I can for ME emotionally and physically. I am sorry i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 01:39 PM
1

I understand. And I know I have rights. But like I said, in order to exercise those “rights,” I would end up spending more in legal fees than what I would ever get in return.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 12:32 AM
0

That’s not really how divorce works. A lawyer can’t just force somebody to pay something. They draft paperwork that has to go before a judge and the judge rules on it. If you can’t get the other person to respond to anything or agree to anything, then you can’t get it approved by a judge. And then even after a judge has court ordered it, if the other party decides not to pay, you have to go back to court and pay more money to fight them to pay what they are supposed to be paying. They can attach…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 12:29 AM
1

I don’t think it makes me a pickmiesha to choose not to accrue more debt to find him and fight him, especially after he’s already proven he has no intention of doing the right thing and I’ll just keep throwing money away. Before I got sick I spent ALL my savings, thousands of dollars, on a lawyer as I was trying to do everything right and by the book. I am choosing not to give him any of what is left of my energy. Everything I have in the way of physical and emotional strength right now is for m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 12:15 AM
1

I am still married to him. He’s been living with his AP for 4 years now. (Affair started in 2014 though, long distance at first as she lived 1000 miles away.) I was a self employed freelancer and on his medical insurance. (He was on my medical for years as a domestic partner before we were married, when I was working for my previous employer.) He started acting strange after almost 2 decades together, started drinking, lost a shit ton of money on basically a pyramid scheme (which was so mind blo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/20 11:42 PM
4

Thank you. The debt is not all medical. I’m least worried about the medical debt because I think (hope) I can negotiate it down eventually. But I have been doing crappy freelancing work, which allows me more flexible hours, and that’s a huge issue because I am so tired and sick a lot. But it pays like crap and I have not filed my taxes in the last two years. So I owe the IRS money and I have student loans. Basically my only debt are the forms of debt that could never be discharged in a bankruptc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 06:13 PM
3

Thank you. I just think, you know, we all want a high value man who is responsible and kind, with good credit and no debt and a good job who is willing to treat us well. But how can I expect to find a man with no debt and good credit when I can’t even provide that myself. And I just don’t see any time in the future when my financial situation will be any better than “somewhat OK.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 02:59 PM
4

Thank you for these responses. It’s been several years of just heartache after heartache. After he left, my ex took our dog to live with him and his AP. Then he had to euthanize my fur baby and he apparently announced it on Fakebook but didn’t even factor me into it or let me know he’d done it, even though that was my baby for 14 years. That was just heartbreaking. Last spring both my parents died suddenly within 3 weeks of each other. I’m physically, emotionally and psychologically burned out. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 12:54 PM
3

https://www.inc.com/john-rampton/8-reasons-why-happy-couples-rarely-share-their-relationship-statuses-on-social-m.html
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 12:14 AM
47

Thanks. Lol oh now actually having cancer, I can say he’s worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 11:44 PM
79

Agree with this!! I had separate bank accounts and he still managed to leave me penniless (with cancer) when he disappeared to live with some girl he barely knew back in high school.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 11:38 PM
8

Also, the women who poached “their man” from another relationship tend to post about their relationship A LOT.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 04:42 PM
23

I don’t have the sources immediately at hand but you can Google it, there is actually scientific research that says that the most insecure people are the ones who are constantly posting about their relationships on social media. There was one recently that said that if a person has their significant other in their profile picture, they are probably very insecure. Plus it’s my very unscientific opinion that almost everything people post on social media is completely fake and very far from reality…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 03:54 PM
12

I’m 46 and was with my husband for 20 years, so it’s been a while since I dated, but this made the little hairs on the back of my neck stand up. It seems very love bomb-ish.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 10:11 PM
1

Sorry to hear. Surprised you got served in person during social distancing. *edit typo
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/20 09:00 PM
3

There is zero connection between the two things. But I am awfully sorry to hear about your dog.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/20 11:39 PM
2

You can Google this, there are lots of articles about the fact that long-term couples essentially fall in and out of love with each other over and over throughout their relationships. Think about it, any couple that is together for any length of time is going to go through periods where they wonder what else is out there, they are aggravated or just not feeling it etc. No one can be together that long and not experience times where there will be rough spots. Marriage used to be a promise to work…
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/20 06:03 PM
3

I agree!
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/20 05:43 PM
6

Men like this responder are the kind who are down voting me, the kind who are raging with anger, hate all women just because one woman hurt them, and will always declare that their wife was a horrible insufferable bitch and that they are perfect, or at least had no or minimal part in their marriage issues. There are some excellent, wonderful men on this sub who will give you great advice. There is also a cluster of raging misogynists and immature men who cannot deal with their anger in any other…
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/20 05:15 PM
-2

Definitely a midlife crisis. ETA: I’m not a man. Sorry. But still, this is definitely a midlife crisis. A man can fall out if love with his wife. But this guy also pretty much left his kid behind.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/20 04:56 PM
1

Good point. A person who makes the rash decision to cheat is not someone I would entirely 100% trust to make a careful and measured decision. Unless said person has gone through extensive therapy and a lot of self work.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/20 08:35 PM
1

I actually had the same conversation the other day with some asshole who claimed that getting divorced when you don’t have kids is the exact same thing as breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend. Which is so not true.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/20 05:30 PM
6

I’ve seen more people in my life than I can count tell me they “can’t stand “ their spouse anymore. Some have divorced and then once the divorce is well over and they’ve settled into a new life, I’ve seen them cry real tears of remorse because they can see in hindsight that those feelings were just feelings in a moment in time and feelings are fluid, and they regret not riding it out and can clearly see from a distance what could have been done to change things. I’ve had other friends who never …
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/20 02:26 PM
5

The seven year itch is completely real. You will likely feel very differently about your wife in a year or a few years time. Married couples fall in and out of love with each other all through the relationship. And sometimes one has fallen out of love while the other is still in love and vice versa. They probably already has been or will come a time when your wife thinks she’s falling out of love with you, but that’s why marriages take work. If you put in the work, you’ll find your feelings chan…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/20 01:11 PM
3

I get it, I know how hard this is. My husband cheated on me, abandoned me and disappeared when I got cancer. I’m embarrassed to say that I actually still have love for him, even though I hate with a passion what he’s done. It really sucks when someone you love shows you that you can’t trust them or that they don’t have the best of intentions.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/20 04:09 PM
15

Not for nothing, but nothing pisses me off more than someone saying they “fell out of love” yet continue to allow the person they no longer love to provide for them for years without saying anything.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/20 03:52 PM
1

😂
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/20 11:36 PM
2

Well you didn’t make a joke about women never being able to admit they’re wrong, so now I am unsure that you’re a man. 😉
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/20 11:28 PM
3

You’re right, I did not get the joke. Well played.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/20 11:14 PM
1

Women do not all like to be “picked up.“ We do not like people “putting the moves“ on us. It’s creepy. I don’t know if InWeGoNow is a man, but they’re definitely someone who apparently paints all women with a broad brush and thinks we all need to be hit on, taken out and showered with gifts. If you are looking to meet a good woman who will make a good partner and not just a fling or a one night stand, or a relationship that eventually sucks the life out of you because your partner makes you resp…
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/20 11:09 PM
4

As a woman, we don’t want you to “put the moves” on us. We like when a conversation begins organically. My advice is to just try to put yourself in situations where there will be members of the opposite sex (after the pandemic, of course). Try Meet Ups, take up a new hobby, join a gym and do group exercise classes, throw a party/barbecue and ask people to invite their friends who you don’t already know...
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/20 08:39 PM
1

How long did they tell her not to come in for? Most people are doing two weeks to a month, the reason being that it takes 14 days for an infected person to show symptoms. I can’t imagine she’s been told to not come in for an extremely extended period. So highly doubtful that this would involve an entire reworking of your current agreement.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/20 07:19 PM
7

This makes me so sad and is also a reason why I (as a woman who was left for the AP) will never get into another serious relationship. I see this kind of hurt expressed here (and I know how it feels), and I can never feel secure in a relationship again because a guarded heart can never open to me the way I’d need it to in order to feel safe and loved. The damage cheaters do really fucking sucks.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/20 11:13 PM
5

I don’t understand what you just wrote. Your father stands behind you? As for the other stuff, divorce is a legal process so get everything in writing and then only communicate with her when you absolutely have to. Why does she have so much to say to you and why are you giving her such an opportunity to have so much to say?
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/20 07:02 PM
2

Yes, you are wrong. Who loses in this situation? You do, and your kids do. You still have to pay her and you don’t see your kids. And your kids will feel like you don’t want to see them. This doesn’t make any sense to me. How does refusing to see your children keep you from being bankrupt or having to pay your ex? It doesn’t. So essentially you will be bankrupt and have children who think you abandon them. I’m not seeing how this is a solution to your problems at all.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/20 06:44 PM
1

I hear you. My ex destroyed us financially, then took off to live with another woman, kicked me off his health insurance and disappeared when I got cancer before getting new coverage in place. So between being abandoned and getting cancer, I’m at a place where I don’t think I’ll ever recover my finances in my lifetime. And he’s off living his great new life where the grass is apparently eternally green and there’s no consequences for his utterly deplorable actions. Took a long time for me to wor…
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/20 04:41 PM
8

First step, find a really good therapist to work through your anger. Because the anger will keep you stuck in place instead of moving forward. You can do this.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/20 02:52 PM
6

As a woman, I agree. Curious, do you say that because of the financial hit of divorce or just because of the emotional part of it? Or both?
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/20 06:58 PM
8

You are working on yourself based on what you said. Give yourself a break, don’t expect so much from yourself. The whole “we became roommates“ thing always irks me because of course that’s going to happen with any two people who spend a really long time together and the simple fix is to work on ways to change things up a little, but instead one party always decides that it’s just unfixable and leaves. So many divorces that don’t have to happen but it’s just that one or both parties don’t underst…
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/20 03:59 PM
3

I’m confused, is your wanting to move south right now the only reason you are contemplating divorce, because she know she won’t go?
/r/Divorce_Men29/02/20 07:59 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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