| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 456 | Be selfish about your wants & needs yall! | LEVEL UP | whenthecagedbirdsing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/07/20 05:07 AM |
| 105 | Caring for me after experiencing pet loss | GREEN FLAG 🟢 | whenthecagedbirdsing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/20 02:51 PM |
| 83 | Big Thanks! | FDS SUCCESS! | whenthecagedbirdsing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/21 03:36 PM |
| 43 | Im learning how to put boundaries in place | STRATEGY | whenthecagedbirdsing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 05:46 PM |
| 27 | Is a vehicle necessary? | SEEKING ADVICE | whenthecagedbirdsing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 04:15 PM |
| 4 | My ex has a new girl already. | RANT | whenthecagedbirdsing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 03:35 PM |
| 1 | Are these signs of a controlling relationship? | RANT | whenthecagedbirdsing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/03/21 05:29 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2 | Learn how to RUTHLESSLY black & delete, no one has time for men who have communication issues. (in friendships and relationships)Yes yes yes! Had a friend who disrespected me over not accepting my boundaries. She sent a frenzy of texts projecting her anger onto me because I wouldn't do what she wanted. Blocked. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/22 09:08 PM |
| 91 | Interracial dating and avoiding MRAsThanks for sharing. I am a WOC (non-Asian) and dated an Asian man years ago. He was very threatened by white men and felt like he had to prove that he didn't abide by the stereotype of Asian men. Also while he was with me he would point out Asian women who date white men and say "treason". It was very strange to me that he felt so strongly about this. He was redpilled for sure and would be on reddit a lot. He was narcissistic and emotionally abusive. I would say to look out for some Asian men wh… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/22 01:17 AM |
| 34 | Just a reminder of the FDS handbook about the benefits of being high maintenanceIt's good to cess this behavior out. It's not good to have a man be on your heels all day because they have nothing to do either. These the kind of guys who don't value women's freedom and must have a woman cater to their every need. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/22 12:36 AM |
| 34 | Backfooting: the Disturbing New Dating Trend Men Don't Want You to Know AboutBeen here before. I had major anxiety of my ex getting mad at me for the smallest things. He wanted to control my every move. I lost touch with myself. I didnt know there was a name for this sort of manipulation. It's sick and awful to do that to someone who isn't even conscious of this or couldn't even fathom why someone would do something so evil. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/01/22 09:34 PM |
| 5 | Strategy - make him jump through hoopsI'm a person who loves sunrises and sunsets. While we were dating my boyfriend woke up at 4am to meet me to catch the sunrise a few times. We've seen some beautiful sunrises as the beach or at the pier together. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/21 02:29 PM |
| 3 | Insecure has a lot of examples of LVM, HVM, and the women that love them. SPOILER HEAVY, read at your own risk.OMGOSH THANK YOU FOR THIS! I've been waiting to talk about this season finale with someone who shares the same opinion. I am so shocked by everyone is happy that Lawrence and Issa are back together. They've been toxic from the beginning. I agree with all your sentiments. I really would've loved to see how Issa could have found love within herself and kept scaling her business. You don't always NEED a man. It's okay just being a woman in the world. That is enough. I went back and forth with someo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/21 02:02 PM |
| 2 | LVM traits and pick-me behavior in popular romance books. Spoilers.Oh nooo. The Spanish Love Deception is on my list of books to read. I had high hopes for this. I will give it a read still but keep FDS principals in mind and not take so much of it in. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/21 09:33 PM |
| 5 | Don’t convince anyone of your worth. If they can’t see it, it’s their loss.I wish I had a reward to give this comment. Spot on. Deeply resonated with me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/21 09:20 PM |
| 4 | Concepts that need to be retiredI totally agree with Instagram is not a reflection of reality and I can attest to this. I was in one of those "insta goals couple" relationships. Our social media was followed by people who were "rooting" for us and our pictures were shared a lot. But behind closed doors I was being emotionally and verbally abused. Now I keep my new relationship super lowkey. I have nothing to prove to anyone and I'm very secure in my relationship now. While my ex is flaunting his new relationship on social medi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/21 12:55 AM |
| 60 | Men don't and can't rescue us.You're right. Men don't rescue. If anything they'll take advantage of a women's poor circumstances. We must rescue ourselves and that will open us up to healthy love. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/21 01:11 PM |
| 2 | "Exclusive" is not a relationship status. You are either in a committed relationship or singleSo true. When I was 18 I dated someone "exclusively" (that's what he called it). When it came to asking if it involves having sex with other ppl he said yes. It's just a way to keep women trapped under the guise of a potential relationship. Trash men ask women to do this. Don't fall for the okie-doke. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/21 10:57 PM |
| 6 | Pickmeishas Reinforce LVM Behavior, and Vice VersaI couldn’t have said this any better | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/21 03:53 AM |
| 37 | Pickmeishas Reinforce LVM Behavior, and Vice VersaThis this this a thousand times! My ex’s friends use to encourage him to drink all the time. Would drink so much he landed himself in the hospital with a concussion. He values the validation from his friends because they’ve been playing sports together for a long time. Men really don’t care about the value the men in their circle have. It’s all about who been with them the longest. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/21 02:39 AM |
| 3 | Most men have bad taste. Don't lose yourself or your uniqueness trying to conform to it Chances are, the male gaze is not your aesthetic.This is so true! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 01:56 PM |
| 4 | Basically All of Reddit vs FDSThe delusion here is nuts. Lol people really convince themselves this is right. Yikes 😬 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 01:30 PM |
| 28 | It makes me genuinely sad when I think about the crumbs I used to settle for.Yup this is my story. We def need to show ourselves grace for making decisions like that. That’s how we can forgive ourselves and move on to something greater. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 12:50 PM |
| 3 | THE LOWEST VALUE MEN ON TELEVISIONLawrence does suck but I wish Issa would’ve just left his ass instead of tolerating his laziness 😫 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 09:52 PM |
| 12 | Don't waste any of your time on people who watch porn.My friends really be making excuses for their significant others and themselves to watch it and it’s just sad to me... 😥 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 09:26 PM |
| 3 | Cheaters, STI’s and how dating apps aid low value men to sling their dick around. I think it’s time HVW boycotted them.Yes! Everything you said is true! These men really dgaf. I was with my ex for some years and would constantly get STI’s thinking it was me not doing proper hygiene. I would go every year for my pap and I’d get checked for STD’s and that’s how my ex would check himself as well and figured if I didn’t have anything he wouldn’t either. He moved right along weeks after the break up to some girl he met on tinder and I wouldn’t be surprised if he started having raw sex immediately. So be careful with … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 09:20 PM |
| 6 | Are you proud of yourself?Thanks so much! I’m so proud of my choices so far to create this life I have! 💖 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 12:03 PM |
| 42 | Are you proud of yourself?I’m proud that I have my own apartment. I have a good job that provides me with benefits. I’m working to build up my photography business and it seems to be going in a great direction so far. I have great people in my community who lift me up. My boyfriend is pretty awesome and has shown HVM characteristics the last 10 months. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/05/21 10:12 PM |
| 18 | Did you hear about John Mulaney's divorce? I'm shocked.She def idealized him. His situation doesn’t sound good at all. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/05/21 09:53 PM |
| 59 | Did you hear about John Mulaney's divorce? I'm shocked.She’s giving off desperate vibes. And it sounds like he needs someone to think of him as a great person more than he believes himself to be. His wife has probably seen him at his worst and he hates it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/05/21 02:42 PM |
| 88 | Don’t Let him Skip the CourtshipYeah huge pass on him. He’s supposed to be trying to impress you. Not this minimal effort BS. 😒 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/05/21 07:51 PM |
| 12 | Found this on Facebook...😂 I’m dead at the fungi and house centipedes | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/04/21 09:45 PM |
| 11 | Plan B, abortion, and adoption are not convenient alternatives to pregnancyYes! many people do not know this. I had to find out the hard way. I believe plan b stops ovulation. If someone has sex the same day they’re ovulating there’s a high chance that they’ll be pregnant. If someone plans to have unprotected sex it’s best they take the plan B beforehand. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/04/21 09:42 PM |
| 49 | How a guy speaks about/treats his mother is super important and tellingThis is sooo spot on! I dated a man where the dynamic was just like this. Even though sometimes he would lose his temper and argue with her. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 11:32 PM |
| 24 | Let’s talk about sexOut of the 6 years I was in a relationship I don’t think my ex ever went to see his doctor regarding his penis. I would go every year for a pap and of course I’d get checked for STD’s and such. He just figured that was his way of checking since “he’s only having sex with me”. And if I don’t have anything then he doesn’t have it either. 🙄 such a flawed way of thinking. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/03/21 01:37 PM |
| 37 | Let’s talk about sexI actually don’t like being told “cum for me”. It just puts a lot of pressure on me to do it and stroke their ego. This is the surefire way to make me fake it. More times than not I can not cum on command. Lol I haven’t had sex since my ex and I broke up last year but moving forward I will be more vocal about that and what does and what doesn’t feel good. And to allow me the space to cum naturally without so much pressure. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/03/21 01:34 PM |
| 21 | The Atlanta Shooting and how it relates to the exploitation of Asian womenI’ve seen this up close. An Asian man I use to date would say “Treason” under his breath while walking past an Asian woman white man couple. It was very weird to me. Asian men are not entitled to an Asian woman. And they shouldn’t judge others for dating outside of their race. It was also very weird because he was dating me, a black woman. I would find his statements very hypocritical and misogynistic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/21 10:38 PM |
| 10 | Poor relationships and toxic shameI’ve definitely came to this realization before regarding my dating history. I had been shitty in the past and I tried to do better in my next relationships to prove to myself that I could actually be in a good relationship. These men were toxic to me and I settled for a long time thinking I always had to earn love or prove that I was loveable. It seems you’re in a better headspace now that you’ve realized all of this. Thanks for sharing and much luck to you on your self love journey. 💞 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/03/21 07:19 PM |
| 4 | Just a thought on what you "attract"I definitely agree with this. I listened to Manon Matthews episode of Share Your Scare. She shared she married a compulsive liar. She said she never had any mental health issues or self worth problems at the time and she still ended up falling for him. Textbook narc lovebombing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/21 09:56 PM |
| 3 | The "other woman" should be an ally, not an enemy. Instead of getting mad at the other woman, you two should be working together to get revenge on the man who cheated you both 😈😈😈I just meant in a general sense of telling a girl what her man is doing. Doesn’t necessarily have to mean with me specifically. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/02/21 04:00 PM |
| 19 | The "other woman" should be an ally, not an enemy. Instead of getting mad at the other woman, you two should be working together to get revenge on the man who cheated you both 😈😈😈This happens every time I try to do that. It never ends well. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/02/21 12:36 PM |
| 45 | What are your thoughts on this? I was raised to pick up after myself, and help the host clean up if needed. Male/female doesn’t matter. Does that make me a pick me? :/I seen this in person too. What’s crazy is the guy who brought her wouldn’t even claim her as his girlfriend and groomed her when she was 16. 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/21 02:23 PM |
| 15 | “She is 18 ‘legal’ so I’m not a pedophile.” Way of thinking needs to stop!!Undoubtedly older grown men who date barely legal girls know they’re trash and they know that the younger women don’t know any better and take advantage of that fact. It’s awful. Men teach that way of thinking to other men. Thinking that somebody has to do it. “It was going to get done anyway. May as well be you.” My ex taught this way of thinking to his friend who didn’t pick up the social skills to talk to women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/21 09:34 PM |
| 5 | The number of comments saying that the man acted this way “because he really likes her”. 🙄 this is not about affection - what you’re seeing here is the very early stages of controlling and abusive behaviour.Yes, they like to mask it to seem like they actually care and that it’s jokes but nah. It’s def controlling behavior in its earliest form. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/21 07:51 PM |
| 11 | fear of being the bad guyI had a fear of being the bad guy for a long time and thought I was being noble by always coming last. This is something I realized my mom does and I’m actively working to undo some of these habits of hers that I took on. Everyday I’m choosing to advocate for myself because no one’s coming to save me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/21 04:44 AM |
| 4 | Show them the same amount of respect they show you!Yep! And being comfortable with that and sitting with the fact that you may disappoint some people. That’s still a hurdle of mine but I’m trying to check that when it comes up. “It’s kinda like oh well. Gotta do what’s best for me ✌️” Gotta always advocate for ourselves! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/02/21 08:20 PM |
| 8 | Show them the same amount of respect they show you!I’ve been learning how to be more assertive as I’ve recognized my true feelings and trusting my intuition. It’s definitely a process to unlearn being passive. Exercising boundaries and sitting with peoples negative feelings is something we have to do often so it can be first nature to protect ourselves while also being discerning of how we should react when men are trying to see what they can get away with. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/02/21 05:22 PM |
| 8 | imagine wanting to expand your family with your husband and he says this shit to you...I can’t even watch that show. It paints black women and men in a horrible light. 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/21 05:26 PM |
| 12 | I was the "forever fiance"Men do it all the time. It’s awful. I was the placeholder girlfriend. My ex gave me a promise ring 2 years into dating and dangled the idea of marriage for several years. They did the same with making sure I have certain achievements as far as getting rid of student loans and blah blah blah. Then a bit over a month after our anniversary he breaks up with me claiming he can’t see us getting married because of religious differences he knew about me since the beginning of our relationship. 🙄A month… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/01/21 03:13 PM |
| 17 | Don't take the bait if a scrote from your past contacts you. They are only contacting you for nefarious and selfish reasons.This is true. My first boyfriend contacted me when I got out of a relationship early last year asking to “rekindle” a friendship. We didn’t end terribly but I found no reason to add any more friends to my life. Also we haven’t spoken in 6 or 7 years because my ex asked me to block him because he felt he still liked me. Which he was right about. We were never really friends and he didn’t add any value to my life when we were “friends” at one point. I just told him we can be friends from a distanc… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/01/21 10:47 AM |
| 41 | Social Media and including your partner in your display picture: Pickmes usually have this habit... are your thoughts on this?I agree as well. Women putting the man in the social media bio profile picture or adding their s/o in their bio is a bit odd to me as an adult. It makes me think that their identity is that relationship. I can also speak from experience. It doesn’t mean anything if you have your man all over the Instagram and he vice versa trying to compensate for the lack of having a good relationship. If he’s for the streets... he’s for the streets. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 10:22 PM |
| 2 | Love makes you look weak to men.This sounds exactly like my last relationship. It’s nuts. It’s crazy how this is the story for so many men. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/01/21 04:05 PM |
| 3 | Her boyfriend complained that she’s only spending $200 for his birthday after she already spent $300 on him for Christmas.My narc ex told me it left a bad taste in his mouth that he had to pay for me to enjoy his birthday celebration. (Rented an Airbnb in another city and ate out for every meal of the day. It was very costly for me) It was the only year where I could not cough up enough cash to do stuff as it was my first year that I moved out on my own. He was very entitled and felt I should pay for myself and everything else for his birthday. He grew up poor and raised by a single mom who managed to turn her life… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/01/21 03:48 PM |
| 10 | He’d rather be drunk with his friends and fishing with his dad than take her out. And the comments.... this is the first time I’ve really witnessed Reddit men’s attitudes about datingExactly. And I can speak from experience. This type of behavior is consistent and I’m sure she doesn’t envision this behavior in a healthy relationship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/01/21 02:57 PM |
| 37 | He’d rather be drunk with his friends and fishing with his dad than take her out. And the comments.... this is the first time I’ve really witnessed Reddit men’s attitudes about datingI know the right answer. Sis has to block and delete. Don’t need any further explanation. Specially dating over 30. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/01/21 02:50 PM |
| 16 | "Sex work is empowering" sounds suspiciously a lot like "trauma induced hypersexuality"I agree and I can attest to being promiscuous after being sexually abused. I thought I was taking my power back but it really drained me of my self esteem. I was definitely operating out of trauma. I wish there was more hype around this fact than the fact of women owning their sexuality through sex work. It’s really just another manipulative patriarchal tactic to keep women behind so we won’t know our true power.😒 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/21 10:51 PM |
| 6 | I deserve more.You most certainly do and never forget it! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/21 10:35 PM |
| 37 | I highly doubt that most straight men are capable of loving somebody romantically.I feel this. My ex cried crocodile tears the day he broke up with me but that same weekend he was out partying having the time of his life and a month later was with someone new. It’s all fake. 🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/21 04:32 AM |
| 2 | Men who get a rise from or think it’s funny to “wind people up” or scare people.My ex was a true LVM. He loved retweeting controversial tweets and see people argue about it. He loved conjuring up a mess. He claimed he wanted to hear people’s opinions but really he enjoyed causing discord. In hindsight I can see him as the master orchestrator in a lot of mess between his friends. Gross and manipulative. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/01/21 01:55 PM |
| 14 | The amount of girls who admitted this is basically their boyfriend is embarassingWow. This was my last relationship lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/11/20 09:11 PM |
| 14 | That last one hits home. If it’s not love, then it’s manipulation. Steer clear!!My ex use to constantly do this. And this is why my anxiety use to be at an all time high. He’d call me and taunt me about something “I did wrong”. He would withhold what it is and I’d have to figure out what I’d done wrong. I remember one time he was upset because I told me ex happy birthday. He verbally abused me for that. He didn’t stop til I was begging for forgiveness and crying otp with him. Then when he felt it was enough he stopped and then went back to normal. It was almost as if a swit… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/11/20 12:41 PM |
| 1 | Why does it throw me off and affect me so much when LVM from my past reach out to me even though I have a healthy relationship now?This seems to always happen. It’s like they can sense when you’re moving on. They still want to know they have that hold over you. When I first got with my ex, my old situationship reached out to me through a friend to tell me happy birthday. Lol 😒 like I really needed to hear from him. I told the friend to tell him to never reach out to me again. That’s the last I’ve heard from him. And when my ex and I broke up in earlier this year I unblocked my situationship on Instagram. He ended up followi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 03:50 PM |
| 13 | Liberal feminism be like.Grade A meme 👌 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 03:03 PM |
| 24 | Rewatching Girlfriends on Netflix and... yikesWhew chyle! I couldn’t wait to talk about Girlfriends with y’all. I can not stand the pickmeisha in Joan. She’s a well off lawyer. Seeing her beg men to love her is very disappointing. She’ll just go off and create scenarios in her head of men she barely even knows. I’m like why?? Also to see her treated like shit time and time again by Toni is just sad. Clearly a toxic friend she chooses to keep in her life just because they’ve known each other since they were children. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/11/20 01:08 AM |
| 3 | When you notice changes in your own behavior...They forget there’s actually people in the world who will date them with children and don’t mind it. People who love children. But nooo... men love lying. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/11/20 04:44 PM |
| 40 | When you notice changes in your own behavior...Good work. Leave at the first sight of a lie. 🚩He’ll lie once, he has no problem doing it again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/20 10:34 PM |
| 2 | what are you proud of?Thanks so much ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/20 12:24 PM |
| 7 | what are you proud of?Graduated from college with a degree in business. I successfully held down a full time job straight out of college with benefits and allows me the time to pursue my dreams. I’m also able to comfortably afford my 1 bedroom apartment near the heart of my city. I’d also like to brag on my strength. I’m 9 months post getting out of a narcissistic abuse type of relationship and I was able to be over him just 3 months after. And shortly after the break up I got a raise and I moved into a bigger apartm… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/20 06:45 PM |
| 21 | How do you get over the shame of having fallen for a LVM?What helped me is learning to love myself and realizing that from the point where I realized who he really was that I would never fall for the okie-doke again. Take the L as a lesson and never look back. Also you have to extend more grace to yourself. You were probably operating out of childhood wounds and trauma you haven’t addressed. You did your best with the information you had at the time. I’m glad you’re in a better place now and you know who you are. I’m sure you’ll make better decisions … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/11/20 02:43 AM |
| 14 | How a HVM handles your illnessLove to hear you’re being treated well. I experienced LVM treatment and HVM treatment during an illness. It’s funny that I compare the two now and see a big difference in how a high value person will treat someone which is with love, compassion, and care. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/20 09:50 PM |
| 3 | some angry scrote was in the comments like, “men always have good ideas and you bitches be aggravating as hell” like this shit isn’t creepy as all hell.This is extremely creepy. I remember being younger some guy from church who had a crush on my aunt would leave the “Love Is..” comic strips from the newspaper on the window of her car. Everytime we’d come out of church id think it was extremely creepy. And this is coming from the same guy who lied to another guy who was interested in my aunt. Telling him that she’s a lesbian. All because she rejected him. Be careful ladies. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 08:53 PM |
| 16 | Woman/wife energy vs Girl/girlfriend Energy. This queen knows what she is talking about.🙏❤️I love Breeny Lee | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 12:49 AM |
| 6 | The BIGGEST fucking RED FLAG!!!Back when I was a pickmeisha my ex told my his last gf pulled a knife on him and the last girl he called himself dating drove her car into a ditch. I had never heard of such a thing. I was extremely aloof to this kind of thing so I thought they were crazy just as he said. Well.. I found out for myself just how crazy making he could make someone. Drove me insane. I had hella anxiety I didn’t realize came from him. I’m glad he never pulled that much craziness out of me. Once we were done I blocked… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/20 09:34 PM |
| 15 | What is the most pointless lie that a LVM has told you?My ex lied to me about being sad about Kobe Bryant’s death. My ex was a big basketball fan. Eat, sleep, and breath basketball. I would think of course he would be sad about a basketball legend dying in a tragic accident. We were in bed together when we found out the news and I asked if he was sad or upset. He replied no and that life happens. Then proceeded to ask me if it would be wrong if he sold his Kobe shoes online because they were going for a lot of money. I wasn’t sure how to answer beca… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/20 09:22 PM |
| 9 | This was a few years ago my LVM ex contacting me months after we broke up (after a 7 year relationship)...he starting dating someone immediately and I subbed here and found you girls. Thank you to all of you who've helped me realize my worth ❤It’s so funny when they try and come back into your life thinking they’ve made some impact with some sorry ass apology. Then think they can weasel back into your life after being a complete asshole. Lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/20 04:57 PM |
| 3 | Caring for me after experiencing pet lossExactly. It’s crazy because I’m so use to men just going for whatever they want and me pretending to be okay with it. I really like that he asked me for consent every step of the way. Even to just put my head on his chest. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/11/20 03:31 PM |
| 5 | Caring for me after experiencing pet lossYou don’t know until you know. Now you do and you know to look out for the signs of someone who lacks empathy. And thanks so much. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/11/20 04:27 AM |
| 77 | Men will shamelessly use you if you let themThis is true. They have no shame at all. And the culture banks on women acting like “precious wives” while the men constantly get away with this behavior. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/20 11:44 PM |
| 5 | Caring for me after experiencing pet lossThank you ❤️ Thank you ❤️ Thank you ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/20 11:28 PM |
| 7 | Caring for me after experiencing pet lossThanks so much for your condolences. I plan to keep you all updated on the progress of this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/20 11:27 PM |
| 25 | Caring for me after experiencing pet lossThank you! The vetting never stops 👌 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/20 07:21 PM |
| 8 | I mean so relatable! Right ladies?? 🤢The usage of “talons” got me dead 💀💀 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/20 09:56 PM |
| 18 | The Value of Block and DeleteI agree. (pre-FDS) I childishly unblocked my exes when I got out my last relationship in February. One of them (who I haven’t spoken to in 6 years) hit me up on Facebook asking to catch up and rekindle a “friendship”. There was never was a true “friendship”. Even when we called ourselves being “friends” he end up telling me he still had feelings for me when he knew I was in a relationship at the time. I told him I’m fine with being friends on Facebook and that’s about it. He respected that and w… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/20 09:38 PM |
| 8 | The only instance which I would change a manSay that! 📢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/11/20 08:56 PM |
| 29 | Feel free to brag about your SO/partner below. What are some green flags you've seen in your relationships?I’m seeing someone and they have all of these green flags but the one that sticks out the most is he how much he honors my boundaries. He allows for me to go the pace that I want to go. We’ve been talking as friends for a few months because I truly want to get to know him and establish a solid foundation. As far as physical boundaries we’ve only just started hugging a bit longer than usual because I’ve expressed this is what I’m comfortable with at the moment. During this courting season he is a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/20 11:52 PM |
| 32 | Why not to pay rent for LVMLVM logic 🤢 I know someone who won’t break up with their girlfriend for this exact reason. They told me they can’t move out because they got a good deal on the place before their gf moved in. And since he “isn’t a complete asshole” he wouldn’t kick her out if he broke up with her and she’d keep the place. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/20 08:49 PM |
| 25 | How to vet a manThank you for making this post! I saved your comment on the other post but this is even better. ❤️ these are good points to remember when vetting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/11/20 04:31 AM |
| 12 | Types of NV/LVM you meet while dating and red flags to watch out for.This was my last relationship described to a T👌 Avoid these men at all costs. Big time wasters and they don’t change 😒 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/10/20 05:11 PM |
| 7 | Trust your gut, it already knows what FDS is trying to teach you.When I would sleep in bed with my LV ex my body would wake me up in the middle of the night. Like I would bolt up and it would be the weirdest thing. But my body was telling me to get out of there 😫 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/10/20 04:21 PM |
| 21 | Most Likely Not.Wow I was having the same symptoms with my LV ex | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/10/20 04:37 AM |
| 10 | Men with an impossibly long list of "preferences" don't actually require a potential girlfriend to meet every single one, they just want the opportunity to devalue any woman who might date them, and an excuse to always keep one foot out the door looking for someone betterI use to try to be the “cool girl”. Biggest con ever. I tried to deny that I was too mature for him and this was something I noticed in the beginning that I ignored. Never again 🙅♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/20 05:47 PM |
| 15 | Men with an impossibly long list of "preferences" don't actually require a potential girlfriend to meet every single one, they just want the opportunity to devalue any woman who might date them, and an excuse to always keep one foot out the door looking for someone betterMy ex use to constantly do this to me. Always talked about how he loved skinny arms and loved a thin woman. He would constantly retweet photos of women online who looked nothing like me and it really broke my self esteem. The guy I dated before him would constantly tweet his preferences as well and I’d always try to match that. It’s a battle you’ll always lose to try and meet someone’s expectations. Now that I know this I won’t entertain that mess again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/20 03:23 PM |
| 10 | 9 ways narcissists abuse people. Please be aware of these type of people. This channel has alot of helpful contents on narcissistic abuse and recovery.It’s so sick and sadistic the way these people work. I’m 8 months out of it and I have made milestones in my healing journey. I think about it from time to time but I’m grateful that I’ve come so far. I have to always remind myself to extend more grace to myself because there is no way I thought there were people out here intentionally trying to hurt me in these ways. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/20 04:33 PM |
| 24 | Pickmeisha says: "My boyfriend still hasn’t told me he loves me. Should I say it first?"I have a friend who was dating a guy for two years and she complained that he hadn’t said I love you yet and it was probably because of his past or his family background. In my eyes it just kind of seemed like he was using her. He came from nothing. He lived in a rural area before meeting my friend in a local bar in the city. He moved in with her and her family. They’ve been together 5 years now and moved in they’re own place together a year ago. She’s just now got that engagement ring. It’s fun… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/20 03:42 PM |
| 23 | All the hate for Nikki blades in the comments.. saying this is why she's single 🙄 No it's bc she's out of your league stfuAll the broke men in the comments bashing her preference. Lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/20 02:55 PM |
| 6 | What hard lessons did you learn over the years through dating?These 3 points are very important. Being in your feminine is an important part to getting what you want from men. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/20 01:46 PM |
| 7 | OC: I decided to do a little gender swap on that horrible meme. I’m not a cartoonist but I hope you enjoy it! 🥰This is PERFECT lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/10/20 04:33 PM |
| 18 | FDS philosophy basically teaches us to value the man that most values us, that is also a person of integrity, makes us feel most safe and valued. It's rewiring our own brains to recognize healthy behaviors and recognize and acknowledge red flags.I love this viewpoint. So much truth in it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/20 06:38 PM |
| 3 | Saying a man will act right for the “right woman” is deeply misogynist and a huge lie.This is very true. Example: it seemed as though my ex was treating his new girl well better and they were spending a lot of time together. He posted a photo of her with her back toward him. The caption was something like “haha my girl is upset because I called her another girl’s name”. Still up to the same ol LVM antics. Nothing about him has changed. Just got some new broad who will deal with his BS. Don’t fall for it ladies. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/20 11:09 PM |
| 13 | Trash Scrote Husband Gaslights Wife on PodcastMany men use this gaslighting tactic to invalidate a woman’s response. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/20 04:27 PM |
| 49 | Trash Scrote Husband Gaslights Wife on PodcastI was waiting to see this on here but I hated this. He gaslighted her and she kept having repeating herself. Just because he keeps asking the same question and doesn’t like her answer it doesn’t mean she’s wrong. He was trying to invalidate her response. 🙄 ugh. And then with the “pressuring into marriage”. When women state their standards and men can’t give it to them or feel it’s too much effort to have them step up to it it’s “pressure”. Like if you don’t want to get married then don’t. Nobody… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/20 03:42 PM |
| 22 | Every man I’ve asked to get tested, whined about it.AND I-OOP! That’s real tea they don’t wanna talk about | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/10/20 08:54 PM |
| 1 | If he’s still blaming women for his behavior, he is NOT a HVM. A HVM is not “the right man for the right one”, he’s the right man 100% of the time and does not exploit Pickmeishas just because he can.Period! mic drop | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 07:55 PM |
| 1 | Man from high school that you haven’t seen in 20 years is texting youYuck! 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 06:25 PM |
| 9 | Question: When a woman messes up against a guy. What is an acceptable action of earning his trust back VS He's using her mistake to abuse her/resentment is growing.I’ve never heard of one in my experience. Usually just ends up in the latter. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/10/20 07:28 PM |
| 44 | A whole wordYup. These are definitely words of an insecure man who can’t stand to be alone and not have validation for just one second. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/10/20 04:52 PM |
| 18 | Demi Lovato broke up with her narc fiancé and is living her absolute best life while he’s ‘crying’ on Instagram🧚🏼♀️Narcs are good at tryna gain sympathy from the public. Lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/10/20 01:31 PM |
| 7 | Watch Out For Love Bombing!!! (Idealize/Devalue/Discard cycle)This is exactly what happened to me in my last relationship. Thank you for the run down. It’s important to vet and take every single red flag into consideration. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/10/20 06:29 PM |
| 4 | Always Be Ready To LeaveThis is so true about LVM and pregnancy. I personally don’t believe in abortion due to religious reasons and I had communicated that in the beginning of the relationship with my LVM ex. Guess what? Ater raw dogging for 4 years I got pregnant. I took a plan B but it just so happened that I had sex on the day I was ovulating so that was pretty much it. 🙃 When I told my ex I was pregnant he blamed me for not getting on birth control even though he would not wear a condom and consented to sex withou… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/20 01:48 AM |
| 4 | This is why the six month period before declaring someone a HVM is a MINIMUM. Strap in ladies, this is fun.I’m taking notes..📝 if I’m writing a paragraph to a man it’s only to discuss rates of me engaging in a conversation with him 💯 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/20 04:01 PM |
| 7 | This is how you should treat a guy who cancels just two hours before and treats you as a second option for a first date 👋🏼😊I love this energy! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/20 09:02 PM |
| 45 | my LVM narc ex whos an abusive cheater left me in may ..after i finally went no contact two weeks ago and stopped being a pick me begging for him back he hits me up today... i prefer ‘Devil’Exactly because they get supply off of even hearing back from you. Starve em! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/20 08:54 PM |
| 99 | This is just so gross! But what's worse is the number of women in the comment section saying they will do this!I’ll eat a jean jacket before I ever let myself lose this much self respect. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 02:19 PM |
| 2 | LADIES, this is why we never stop vetting. No matter how interested in you the guy may seem, he may be playing mind games. So don’t let your guard down. I hate seeing content like this on twitter.Absolutely Disgusting | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 05:02 PM |
| 2 | 30-year-old man child wakes up at 4 pm. Blocked 🤷🏻♀️This what I like to see ladies! 🙌🏽 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 05:46 PM |
| 26 | Let's talk about gaslighting for a secIt’s really sick and twisted they get joy out of causing women pain. 🤢 Most men actually hate women and don’t realize it. I think I’m at the point of stating my boundaries just once and if they’re crossed even once.. I’m not even going to reiterate. Just block and delete. I realize men know exactly what they’re doing. They pretend to be oblivious and then get upset at you for not giving them another chance to f*ck up again. It’s laughable. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 04:17 PM |
| 20 | Put on your "scrote-seeing lenses" on, sis!! NEXTBasically. Actions mean more than words. And they never seem to match up to what they say. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 04:04 PM |
| 6 | LVM will always be LVMGreat point. Makes me feel better that my ex hasn’t changed just because he’s with someone new. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/09/20 05:13 PM |
| 4 | Collage of my ex, so glad that's overThis collage is very similar to my experience. Sheesh. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/09/20 01:43 AM |
| 9 | SCORCH A SCROTE: Today I burned every single love letter, card, note, drawing he ever gave me- AND I DID IT LITERALLY WEARING A CROWN I ORDERED JUST FOR THIS OCCASION!Yes! I recommend! Burn it to the ground. I burned all my ex’s stuff or gave it away to charity. Let it all be just a memory. Or if anyone asks..it never happened cuz where’s the proof. 🤷♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/09/20 01:17 AM |
| 13 | If you find yourself ruminating over your abusive banana slug...Say it louder for the people in the back! 🔊 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 03:57 AM |
| 2 | Mine is more of a grid. LolThat’s right! You’re moving on to bigger and better! Everyone can’t tag along! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 03:52 AM |
| 9 | Old pickme defending my exes to my family and friendsThank God for Growth ⬆️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 03:08 AM |
| 5 | My leveled-up life without the NVM anchors tied around my ankle. My engagement to myself is going well, thanks so much for asking. I’ve just never met anyone like me before 😍🥰✨Love to see it ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 03:06 AM |
| 5 | Mine is more of a grid. LolI swear they need praise for every bare minimum challenge they complete. Spare me. Lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 02:59 AM |
| 12 | Mine is more of a grid. Lol(Referencing the 2nd slide) Guys are so lame when they do this. Terribly insecure. Needs constant validation and attention or they’ll die. lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/09/20 11:16 PM |
| 15 | FDS success for black womenFor me I would say I am meeting more respectable men and I’m being very selective about who gets my time. Adhere to the handbook. It won’t steer you wrong. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/09/20 04:09 PM |
| 6 | It really be like that sometimes 🤦🏽♀️...🤢🤮 they never stopped drinking the baby formula lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/20 07:31 PM |
| 22 | It really be like that sometimes 🤦🏽♀️...I felt this. My ex and his mom were close. I could tell she was really attached to him. They told me she made him and his brother sign a contract when they were little that they have to let her live with them if she wants. I was like 🤔. It’s seems kind of controlling. Especially to put on young children. He still lives with her at 27 years old. And she planned to get the basement renovated so he can have more room. Smh. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/20 03:51 PM |
| 3 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020No red flags so far. Which is good. I’m still vetting. I’m still enjoying being single. But he def feels like my twin flame. I’m also being cautious of my feelings. I’m guarding my heart. (Also see my response above to the other user for more info) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 04:05 AM |
| 3 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020Thanks for your concern. We’re still just friends. No one has even said they like each other or anything yet. I know it sounds crazy. I’m definitely taking things super slow. I don’t have any expectations. We have a lot of synchronicities. Ive also known him since grade school. We’re still getting to know each other as adults. I’ve come a long way in my healing journey to be able to discern people and their intention. I’m still in the process of vetting and I’m still hanging out with other peopl… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 04:02 AM |
| 7 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020I think I may have met my twin flame. He’s a HVM. Very respectful of my boundaries and is taking things very slow with me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 02:25 AM |
| 18 | Normalize turning your phone off before 9pmMy ex was a night owl. He would sleep during the day and was up all night. I had a 9-5 and would be tired after work. He’d call me every night at like 2:30 in the morning almost every night. Then when I’d see him after work sometimes he’d get upset that I was sleepy and I would fall asleep on the movies we would watch. He messed with my sleep for years. I won’t do it again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 11:42 PM |
| 10 | Is it just me or do ugly men just generally treat you horribly or worse?Some unattractive guys get an ego boost off of pulling a good looking woman. If they’re a grown boy they will def play with you because they take in pride knowing they can f*ck with an attractive girl’s self esteem. 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 07:52 PM |
| 15 | Make Leveling up your full time jobI’m working on having 4 sources of income! And also working on being good roller blading. It’s a fun thing to do and also go for being athletic and I use it as a de-stressor. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 07:49 PM |
| 4 | Successes, failures, and lessons learned this week? Let’s discuss.Love this attitude! When I start dating next year I hope I can get this same energy from someone. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 04:39 AM |
| 2 | What are phrases or strategies men use in order to use the hope of marriage/kids to keep you around without ever giving them? Not dating now b/c of covid, curious for futureMy ex gave me a promise ring when I was like 19. He promised to change my last name to his. As years went by the less I heard of this promise and his behavior got worse. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 12:48 AM |
| 65 | Don’t fool yourself into thinking he cares or has changed his mind about being with you!‼️‼️ they like to fantasize and idealize you because it seems like you’re doing so much better. They want a piece of it. Don’t let em! They’re still that sh*tty person they always were. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 09:49 PM |
| 125 | Don’t fool yourself into thinking he cares or has changed his mind about being with you!Lol those ones are the first to watch your stories. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 09:36 PM |
| 3 | A rant about some things i've learned while getting back into datingExactly! Now level up even more and don’t look back. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 04:48 PM |
| 14 | A rant about some things i've learned while getting back into datingYou put up with a lot. Please never do any of these things for a man unless he’s your husband and even still. Don’t even let LVM like this into your aura. He doesn’t deserve it. I use to be with a guy who lives with his mom in the basement. He was extremely lazy as well. His mom did everything for him. They don’t understand hard working ethics. They’re extremely entitled. No more bums. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 04:34 PM |
| 17 | When he talks 💩 about his exes, then you know that he's actually the one who is 💩This is truth. My ex would mention how all his ex’s were crazy. One threatened to kill herself by jumping into traffic on the highway and also pulled a knife on him. The last one drove her car into a ditch. My naive 19 year old self at the time said I’d never be like that. He was crazy making so I totally understand their mindset at the time. He’s a compulsive liar. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 01:16 PM |
| 12 | This is the queen energy we all need!Love her tiktok so much! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 10:58 PM |
| 6 | Never let yourself forget the true nature of men🤢🤢🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 10:53 PM |
| 59 | Men that try to argue your sexual preferencesIt’s gaslighting. Men constantly do this to get what they want. They don’t care how the woman may feel uncomfortable. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 03:17 PM |
| 15 | Feel free to unblock me 🤡🤡🤡Sounds like a manipulator and gaslighter trying to use you for emotional labor. My ex gave me the same spiel after we ended things. Just another tactic to use and abuse you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 12:35 AM |
| 2 | Man to avoid: the insecure narcissistThanks! Well I realized I had some codependency issues of course. I had to learn to live unapologetically and that it is not on me what others do. That I can’t control/influence others to act right. I’ve had some traumas in the past dealing with my dad’s anger issues. My mom is codependent and tries to fix other people’s problems and has taken my dad’s anger as it is and has enabled him all this time. He’s 50 and he’s just now getting the help he needs. I spilled my heart out in family therapy a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 04:21 PM |
| 2 | Man to avoid: the insecure narcissistI am so glad I’m done with him too. My life has done a complete 180 without him in my life. I’ve realized my traumas and worked through therapy to heal them. I’m still working on my self esteem. It’s a lot better since we have broken up though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 04:03 PM |
| 5 | Man to avoid: the insecure narcissistThis was my whole last relationship summarized. It’s so sad how they can do this. One of the last times my ex verbally abused me was a night where he was trying to convince me to go out with him to some upscale club instead of going out with my friend who wanted to support another friend’s party/local talent show. My friend asked me weeks in advance and I was sticking to my word. He texted me all night begging me to come to him. So I give in finally and tell him I’ll meet him towards the end of … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 01:56 PM |
| 7 | What’s Sex Like with a NarcissistThis sounds like my ex as well. Narcs are so textbook. And mine wouldn’t even care if I had a yeast infection and would still ask for sex. Dirty demons. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 09:51 PM |
| 12 | Working hard and doing queen shit pays off 👏I’m working my hardest to achieve this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/20 07:35 PM |
| 3 | Thank you to all you FDS Queens for checking me every time I start veering back towards PickmeishastanLove this. I bookmarked this so I will remember to do the same. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/20 05:10 PM |
| 5 | Now we know why that man is an exI don’t think so. I think she likes it. I think she thinks this is the best she can do unfortunately. She’s got his support. She has an okay job. They go out to eat. They take trips with the family. Think she thinks she’s solid where’s she’s at. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/20 04:30 PM |
| 13 | Now we know why that man is an exI wish when she moved to the city she would’ve leveled up and made a life for herself. She did the opposite. My ex’s mom said she got pregnant on purpose. I’m starting to believe she did. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/20 04:12 PM |
| 10 | Viewing low value men as cats can help you see when you are being exploitedTruth. My ex dropped me the year i moved into my own place. I couldn’t be dedicated to being his bangmaid and waiting on his needs hand and foot all day anymore. I actually had big girl responsibilities. It was too much for him. Now he’s moved on to another sucker who’s bought him a PS5 within the first few months of dating. Lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/20 11:26 AM |
| 113 | Now we know why that man is an exI had an old friend who has been dating this guy for 8 years. They were in a long distance “relationship” for the first 6 years. He would not claim her because she isn’t the most attractive by certain standards I guess. She moved to his city and he still didn’t claim her. His parents heard rumors that my friend moved to his city for him and asked if they were dating and he said no. Anyway a year after she moves to his city she gets pregnant by him. He waits all the way until the 7th month of pre… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/20 11:20 AM |
| 11 | Excuse the profanity, but her passion spoke to me. I’ve been here. Black women, you DO NOT need to struggle behind a man to one day be worthy of love!! You are not losing anything by letting go of a man who mistreats you!THIS! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/20 11:42 PM |
| 36 | Excuse the profanity, but her passion spoke to me. I’ve been here. Black women, you DO NOT need to struggle behind a man to one day be worthy of love!! You are not losing anything by letting go of a man who mistreats you!Period! SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK! 🔊 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/20 06:11 PM |
| 6 | Which Movies Do you Consider a Red Flag if A Man Raves About it and Says it's his Favorite?Mafia movies for sure. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/20 06:07 PM |
| 19 | Talking to a guy that was iffy on hinge. Immediately realized why I was supposed to STAY OFF dating apps in the first place.🚩 block n delete. You already know what to do hon. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 07:25 PM |
| 44 | Remember ladies, loving someone unconditionally just gets you screwed over. 😌No lies detected | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 03:22 PM |
| 15 | Why do men do this, it really irritates me. If you know you're not ready for a relationship or don't want one with her, then just leave her alone. Don't string a woman along just to feed your ego.Lol this is exactly what happened to my goofy ass. I won’t do it again. I thank FDS. I have enough self love to not put up with this crap anymore. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 11:11 PM |
| 4 | My abusive ex would regularly get mad at me for talking to my friends, suspecting it was always about him and ‘lies’ about what he was like. His reactions pushed me into deeper cycles of isolation and abuse. Nothing that hurts you is sacred. Run the very first time he does anything like this.Right! My ex served for a while and had a day job which was temporary. Once that was up. He sold drugs for a bit of time and wanted to be a police officer. Lol that didn’t work out. He went back to school and worked part time at his mom’s child development center while trying to branch off of her and make an after school center which is still in the works. Everytime I’d ask about it he’d get upset and shrug it off saying he doesn’t want to talk about it. He was very lazy btw. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 10:25 PM |
| 5 | My abusive ex would regularly get mad at me for talking to my friends, suspecting it was always about him and ‘lies’ about what he was like. His reactions pushed me into deeper cycles of isolation and abuse. Nothing that hurts you is sacred. Run the very first time he does anything like this.Lol this my ex to a T. My parents would ask all the time what he’s doing for work. I didn’t ever know what to say. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 09:34 PM |
| 18 | My friends and I love this one: this LVM told me he didn’t believe in condoms on a first date and when I ended the date he unraveled.The insecurity jumped out | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 09:07 PM |
| 9 | How to vet his friendsTruth. My ex’s close circle of friends were all terrible. Had forever girlfriends, used escorts, some used heavy drugs, alcohol addictions, etc. I will most definitely vet friends better for my next relationship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 09:05 PM |
| 15 | If you can’t tell people what he didThis is a very good point. A lot of things I hid from embarrassment. Supposedly he would change.... never happened. 😒 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/20 01:24 AM |
| 15 | The reality my ex’s get hit with when they check up on me.Period! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/20 01:18 AM |
| 23 | Be selfish about your wants & needs yall!I agree. This is why it’s so important to vet and make sure the men we date are emotionally healthy and are not constantly driven by their egos. There is so much that women have to offer and a lot of times the men they choose distract them from their potential. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/07/20 02:42 PM |
| 9 | Promise Rings- Do they mean anything?This is truth! My LVM gave me a promise ring and it meant absolutely nothing. Lol it’s just an opportunity to dangle marriage over your head until they’re bored with you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/07/20 03:08 AM |
| 7 | FDS works...my BF proposed to me tonight :)Congrats! This gives me hope. Thanks for sharing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 01:57 PM |
| 22 | Pickme female musical artists?Kiana Lede. Her album KiKi is 👌. Listen to Second Chances and Cancelled. Also listen to Cater 2 Me by Angelic. Not necessarily sure if she makes pickme music in its entirety but it’s a good sound about self love. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 10:22 AM |
| 1 | Has anyone's past pick-me behavior/internalized misogyny stemmed from observing your parent's relationship growing up?I thought that too. And I thought you had to earn someone’s love. I’m so glad I’m over that mindset. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 02:49 AM |
| 7 | FREEEEEEEEESee what happens when you drop LVMs. Go sis! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 01:57 AM |
| 6 | Guys who play video games, obsess over cars in a childish way, or collect stupid piece of plastic as "hobbies"Yeah I feel like if they put more time into video games (unless they are a streamer of some sort) instead making a life for themselves... then it’s definitely a problem. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 01:25 AM |
| 45 | Guys who play video games, obsess over cars in a childish way, or collect stupid piece of plastic as "hobbies"I use to date a gamer and I thought it was cute before. He’d spend hours playing and trolling strangers during our time hanging out together. 😒Now I would not. Good points made here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 01:05 AM |
| 1 | Men know immediately with who they gonna marryThanks, love. I’m glad you are too! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 12:57 AM |
| 6 | Men know immediately with who they gonna marryHe was... he told me. He was debating for months he said. I wish he would’ve just told me then so I wouldn’t have wasted months of my time. I could’ve been further along my healing journey. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 04:04 PM |
| 16 | Men know immediately with who they gonna marryMy ex was acting sort of distant the same week we broke up. We had been together for 6 years.(he was my first bf I met at 19.) I just thought that is was a busy week for him since he was doing things to open up his business and it was his mom’s birthday week. He texted me one day saying that he wanted to talk about something in person that was bothering him. He came over the day before vday and broke it off claiming that he couldn’t see himself marrying me because I don’t have a car and that my … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 03:40 PM |
| 15 | Men know immediately with who they gonna marryI’m sick 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 02:48 PM |
| 17 | Men know immediately with who they gonna marryLink the video | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 11:14 AM |
| 8 | Reminder: Don’t be Barb the Builder (on a thread asking men what made them “settle down”Glad you got out of that. These people don’t change and it’s sad.... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 03:38 AM |
| 7 | When you reject a NVM and his feelings are hurt, it shows.The reply has me 💀... like it’s something to brag about. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 12:01 AM |
| 27 | “It’s normal to feel attracted to others in a relationship.”This was definitely a lie I told myself to keep from being embarrassed about my LV ex’s behavior. And he did it all in the name of “jokes”... 😒 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 10:40 PM |
| 31 | This was on an askmen thread about former players explaining why they finally decided to settle down. Guys... we are not responsible for “filling your void”. Fill it on your own first and stop making us do your emotional labor. Using women for sex as a way to fill it is not appropriatePREACH! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 07:01 PM |
| 6 | LVM intentionally make their girlfriends jealous because they like the attentionMy narcs love attention. Couldn’t be alone. When he would go out he would complain about my absence and then talk about how many girls come up to him and he has to bring his phone out all the time to show them pictures of his girlfriend he “loved very much”... 🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 03:09 PM |
| 19 | Lvm "apologizing"“I’m sorry. I understand if you want to break up since I’m so terrible.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/20 11:28 PM |
| 3 | This is the first time I’ve walked awayMaking big steps forward! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/20 11:27 PM |
| 145 | Harsh truthThis is the sad sad truth. I hate how they take advantage of people like that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/20 03:13 PM |
| 11 | Saying No is the easiest way to saying Yes to what you wantI got that same mindset now. I’m not bending backwards for no one. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/07/20 05:32 PM |
| 2 | Weekend Watchings - The Forsyte Saga, My Brilliant FriendI think this is a great analysis. Yes, Lila did teach Elena many things. I’m glad that she always encouraged her to keep going to school. It was almost like she was living vicariously through her. When Elena wins she wins (although Lila could be a little jealous at times) I do wish in certain instances Elena would’ve stuck up for herself more but I’m also glad that we got to see her character development of her standing up for herself (I.E. when Nino’s dad tried to make a move on her on the beac… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 07:08 PM |
| 5 | Weekend Watchings - The Forsyte Saga, My Brilliant FriendIt really is. Especially during those times. I feel so bad for Lila’s upbringing. If she were to switch lives with Elena she’d be unstoppable! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 02:35 PM |
| 7 | Weekend Watchings - The Forsyte Saga, My Brilliant FriendI love my Brilliant Friend too. I recommend others to watch as well. Lila has so much power. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 12:38 PM |
| 10 | I'm too petty to receive dick pics.What a disgusting lil scrote | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/20 10:22 PM |
| 4 | Reframe your mindset.I love this. I will keep in mind of these mindsets. These are very helpful when I get disappointed by men. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/20 12:40 PM |
| 5 | She Was "Raised" To Be This?!I’m curious. What’s this in reply to? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 04:27 PM |
| 75 | AVOID THIS AT ALL COSTSWhat’s funny is my ex expected all my chores to be done before he came over and expected me to have everything he would need food wise. But when I came over his room was terrible. He never cleaned his tub. Only way it got cleaned is if his mom decided to bathe their family dog and she wanted the tub cleaned before putting their dog in it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 12:54 PM |
| 2 | "But I love him!!"Absolutely! So sorry you’re going through this. It’s definitely one of the toughest things I had to get through. It is really scary when you realize everything you thought you knew was a lie. A book that has helped me is Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. She has prompts in the book. Like a Q&A. I think it’s helpful to participate in that so it can really resonate with you. I also just finished “How to Get Over a Boy” by Chidera Eggerue. These are both good for repelling narc individuals and… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 12:43 PM |
| 8 | "But I love him!!"Yup. Went through this as well. Didn’t realize how much I had been manipulated until after the fact. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/07/20 11:21 PM |
| 27 | Thread on detecting lies and infidelityThis was lengthy and helpful. My ex was low value and definitely has tried to pull some of this shit. Toward the end it seemed like I was the only one trying to save the relationship. But he was done mentally and he ended the relationship. Then posted some new girl a month later on his social media. 🤡 I’m such a clown but I know better now. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/07/20 12:23 AM |
| 1 | Hes doing fineThis sounds like my ex to the T! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 04:34 PM |
| 3 | Hes doing fineThank you sis! 🙌🏽 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 01:56 PM |
| 3 | Hes doing fineI was thinking the same thing. My ex did exactly this. How embarrassing for me. He started talking to someone seriously 2 weeks after we broke up. Another victim to abuse.. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 01:00 PM |
| 12 | When you call him out and he calls you crazyCall it out sis! Loved how you stood firm. These LVM don’t know who they’re messing with! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 11:13 AM |
| 6 | Is a vehicle necessary?I forgot to mention these LVM I dated are incredibly selfish and they want to be catered to hand and foot. I realized this after the fact of course. Thank you for your comment. I will definitely take this into consideration and be sure I will not let a LVM try to guilt me into buying something I can’t afford so it can be more convenient for them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 09:24 PM |
| 4 | Is a vehicle necessary?Thanks so much. Really appreciate your comment. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 08:37 PM |
| 3 | Is a vehicle necessary?Exactly my point. Not only would I have to pay for the car note but I have to pay for gas, insurance, and other things if something is wrong with the car. I live in Chicago and there is public transit everywhere. I also uber like I mentioned above. My ex complained of having to pay to Uber me back to my place because he’s too tired to drive me back. (I have money for my own Uber btw) He made me feel bad for not having my own car. But the thing is he still lives in his mom’s basement and doesn’t … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 08:30 PM |
| 6 | Is a vehicle necessary?Thank you for your advice. I’m hoping there’s a HVM in the future willing to do that for me❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 06:21 PM |
| 4 | Is a vehicle necessary?I have access to all that stuff and made good use of it and he still found a way to complain about it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 06:19 PM |
| 7 | Is a vehicle necessary?Thank you for your comment. Same here. I’ve learned my lesson and I’ll make sure I won’t date any man who thinks that traveling to me is an inconvenience. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 06:18 PM |
| 7 | Is a vehicle necessary?Thank you 🙏🏽 I do plan on getting a car at the end of the year. It just wasn’t in the cards for me at this time in my life. I had to choose getting a place of my own or a car. I wasn’t happy staying at home with my family and I knew I wanted a place of my own. Getting around has not been a problem for me so far. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 06:16 PM |
| 15 | Is a vehicle necessary?Thank you 🙏🏽 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 05:34 PM |
| 9 | Is a vehicle necessary?My ex was like that in the beginning but then he grew tired over the years even though I always ubered to his house and he would usually take me home. When I moved closer to him he still complained about having to take me home (15 minute drive). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 05:33 PM |
| 4 | Opt out of the LVM's tricksI’m so done with him it ain’t even funny and I have so much peace in my life now that he’s gone. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/20 01:30 AM |
| 17 | Opt out of the LVM's tricksGirl yes. Like I would care 🤦🏽♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/20 02:16 PM |
| 21 | Opt out of the LVM's tricksLol this is so true. My ex tried to pull some shit like this. I gave him a week to decide what he truly wanted. He didn’t text me all week so I texted his mom telling her thank you for being so kind and considerate to me throughout the years. He sends me a follow up email explaining that he hasn’t told his mom we broke up yet and that’s why it’s taken her a while to respond to my text because she was shocked we broke up. He hadn’t told anybody for that matter but I wasn’t gonna sit up there whil… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/20 11:56 AM |
| 8 | What led you to find this sub?I got out of a forever girlfriend situation and I realized my ex was a narcissist. That led me to the narcissist abuse subreddit. A user mentioned this subreddit in regards to leveling up in all aspects and I was definitely in need of leveling up! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/06/20 04:33 PM |
| 6 | 🚩How to Recognize a Toxic Relationship🚩This was good. My ex fit every requirement. 😅 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/06/20 05:44 PM |
| 2 | Men struggle to have deep and fulfilling relationships with each other, so it’s no surprise they struggle to have deep and fulfilling relationships with women.It sure is and it’s sad. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/20 04:41 PM |
| 11 | If he mistreated the first woman he dated, he will do the same to you. Men do NOT "change" when it's time to "settle down". Ladies, do not believe this.This is extremely accurate! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/06/20 02:08 PM |
| 6 | This article should be a lot shorter, “if a man regularly yells at you, leave”So sorry to hear that happened to you. He’s awful. I experienced verbal and emotional abuse from my narc. Towards the end I had crazy anxiety. These people don’t change. There is no way to deal with these people. Even when you try to rationalize or explain how you feel it always turns out your fault and your feelings are never taken into consideration. It’s just better to save your own sanity and get out as quick as you see red flags. Listen to your gut always. No one deserves this kind of treat… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/06/20 02:40 AM |
| 12 | This article should be a lot shorter, “if a man regularly yells at you, leave”Definitely trash. Keep em blocked! 🙌🏽 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/06/20 07:46 PM |
| 63 | This article should be a lot shorter, “if a man regularly yells at you, leave”I second the title. My narc use to yell at me. I tried what the article suggested. Didn’t work. I won’t put up with it again. It’s just best to leave these temper tantrum babies alone. They have some inner work to do. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/06/20 05:52 PM |
| 7 | What behaviors do you think a man "unlocks" from you, or "earns" when you go from his girlfriend to his fiancée, and from fiancée to wife? Looking for general and specific advice on giving too much too soon in a relationshipYeah. I agree here. One of the reasons my ex broke up with me is because I didn’t have money to go on a trip for his birthday that he planned that same week. And even though I made birthday plans for him already he decided he didn’t want to do that and instead wanted to go to Toronto. He paid for me and I had to pay him back. Said it left a bad taste in his mouth. 😒 I was so dumb...I def gave too much of myself when he had commitment issues. Never again. FDS all the way! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 02:24 AM |
| 2 | Early signs of narcissism.I feel the same way. Energy vampires they are indeed. Now that I’m out of it my life has been so much more peaceful. I hope yours is too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 12:14 PM |
| 3 | Early signs of narcissism.You hit it right on the nail with this post! My narc had no consideration for my time. Always! I always had to do what he wanted and when it came to showing up for me he would make up poor excuses. My narc had several of these traits. I was too blind in love to see it. Smh I deserved so much better than that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 02:08 AM |
| 1 | Early signs of narcissism.I basically went through the same cycle as this. I was so anxious towards the end. But I’m glad that it’s over cuz I will never ever ever go for something like that again. I’m asking God to guard my heart even more now. I don’t even wanna be bothered with men at the moment. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 01:45 AM |
| 11 | Early signs of narcissism.-Is looking to do things for attention online like retweet controversial topics to create strife -always tries to play devils advocate when trying to debate topics -takes advantage of any opportunity to one up someone -extremely competitive -verbally abusive -keeping the door open with any old rendezvous -go tit for tat -tells you a sob story about how their ex broke their heart and is crazy -mirroring -lovebombing -exaggerates the truth -gaslights *some of these are not necessarily early signs.… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 10:04 PM |
| 5 | How to get over ex boyfriendI would say you’re already on the right track. I’m hoping you’ve blocked them and don’t lurk their social media as well. If you have memorabilia of when you guys were together get rid of it. Completely detox your mind of this person. Keep reading posts on here and watch videos to learn your queen status. I’m healing from a narcissistic abuse relationship of 6 years still and it’s been 3 months so far. The time moves fast when you completely devote your time to healing yourself and I’m in a much … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/06/20 05:10 PM |
| 2 | Ella Eyre - New MeReally love the message of this song 🙌🏽 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/06/20 03:40 PM |
| 14 | Why do I feel sad or ashamed over a guy who can’t decided between me or his ex?Keep yourself distracted and use all that energy you poured into him into yourself. If all it takes is for his ex to come back into his life to make him unsure what he wants go about your way. You should come second to none. Don’t wait for someone to be sure about you. You deserve someone who’s absolutely sure. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/05/20 05:17 PM |
| 3 | What are 5 things you love about yourself?I love how resilient I am I love how passionate I am about following Christ I love that once I make a decision I follow through til the very end I love that I worked hard for everything I have I love how full of love I am | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/04/20 07:30 PM |
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