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wineandtrees Archive

View 0 posts and 96 comments by wineandtrees on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

Am I the only one who thinks he looks his age???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 04:04 PM
58

I wouldn’t bother showing it to anyone who does say that. They know what they are doing. It’s the number one tactic men in my family use to silence women in an argument along with “why are you getting angry/ why are you raising your voice?” after they’ve already started yelling at you. They already know how they are acting. I just stop wasting my time talking to people who do this now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 07:58 PM
3

I think this involves two separate issues. Age of consent and when one is a legal adult. Going with this hypothetical, if the age of majority was 21 the age the age of consent wouldn’t necessarily follow. In many, if not most, places the age of consent is lower than 18. It very likely wouldn’t stop men from dating 18-20 year olds. I do see the value in teaching girls self worth and that there are more important things to focus on at that age. Wanting to legally keep 18-20 year olds as children t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/21 08:34 PM
5

I see what you mean but 21 is also an arbitrary number. 25 would make more sense if going by brain development. Though I think 18 is just fine. Sure I was immature, but I would've been worse off had I still been under someone else’s control. Emancipation isn’t a super easy process that a mass amount of people could do. I think 21 as legal adult age would hurt young women far more than young men as it’s more likely to lock them into abusive situations, especially when it comes to being able to ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/21 04:21 PM
76

Same, though I’m starting to feel like some gross monster reading this thread…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 04:25 PM
20

The issue with a case like the one you gave (sisters) and others where it is “okay” is that it still is exploiting women for their bodies. It would be used to argue that it is okay to use women for their bodies and that it is a choice when for the vast majority it is not. It’s also not true that a woman won’t be humiliated or stigmatized for being a surrogate. Many of the surrogates from impoverished countries are married. It is not regarded highly to be carrying a baby that is not your and your…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 04:29 PM
1

This is the same argument people use to try and say that prostitution is a choice for women and that there is no harm in it. Or was this you saying this to demonstrate how ridiculous the argument is?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 01:27 PM
15

Maybe consider adoption or just having none at all. You’re literally saying you are okay putting another woman through pain and suffering that you wouldn’t go through all to pass on your genes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 07:39 PM
11

I’ve been considering doing just this. A family member who actually means something to me( and also a much better sounding name tbh) rather than carry my nvm father’s name.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 07:35 PM
7

I wonder if she’s American. Because if she is she would realize how ridiculous it sounds if she were to replace it with American football. Or at least realize that the issue isn’t cultural but shitty and cruel men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 04:09 PM
14

I will never forget the time my ex said to me after sex, “I feel like I just raped you”. I was extremely sad at breaking up and figured I’d have sex with him a last time (idk why). After it started I immediately felt awful and tried not to cry. The whole time I thought he just didn’t notice and that I was good at hiding my emotional pain, and I felt too guilty to stop him. Then he said that… This same man was even able to tell my mood with my back turned, and still I thought that time must be di…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 01:09 PM
4

At a certain point I wonder if they are even aware they are even doing this. Or else I really do feel used for emotional labor when they are down, and ignored when they no longer are crying over a guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 11:41 PM
3

That’s true, it’s just worse when it’s family as well and can’t avoid it. I’m starting to use the strategy of just listening and giving no feedback at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 11:39 PM
46

What kills me is all the women who post for advice after such a short time. If you’re having issues that early why try “saving” it? I’m having this issue with a friend recently. She gets so emotionally invested immediately and then is heartbroken after a couple months because he was “a great guy”. I never know how to help. I give my advice which she says she should take then throws it away when she finds a reason to stay with this man and ignore every red flag. It keeps happening, and this happe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 04:27 PM
10

Maybe this is just different in New England or broader Northeast. But class absolutely plays a role in my part of the US. It affects everything, but I would never know if I just never met people born into the upperclass. They way they live and look at life is almost completely foreign to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 04:13 PM
2

Luckily when I was still trying OLD it seemed more women were at least honest and put “flexible” “curious” or other word to suggest the weren’t quite sure. As a bisexual I feel shitty saying this, but I’m always afraid of coming across a woman who puts bisexual and uses that to get a date before realizing it isn’t for her. So I guess I don’t mind people accepting terms like “fluid” to describe their sexuality if it means they may be less likely to do that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 07:21 PM
7

Ya the article also kinda implies this. I’m a little confused by the wording of sexual fluidity in this article. It doesn’t say more women are bisexual but that they are “embracing sexual fluidity”. If this many women are bisexual then I have yet to find them irl. I think it only really means open to experimentation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 04:22 PM
2

Thanks for the encouragement! Lately I’ve been pretty down about my lack of degree and job. Though I actually do like my current job, which I got by doing a scaled down version of what you did and switching to higher hourly pay jobs every year, building on previous experience. Now that I’m on first shift at a major company I’m looking to make my way to a management position in a few years while I go back to school.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 08:00 PM
2

That is insane, which is why there and Manhattan were the first places that came to mind for me as exceptions(as well as many areas in California). I can’t imagine even trying to live there. I’d personally love to live in Boston, but the housing there is ridiculous as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 07:55 PM
1

Which is why I usually assume the people saying these things live in extremely wealthy areas. The issue I have is the amount of people on this sub that don’t seem to realize that is a very small portion of the whole country and don’t understand why anyone would see 6 figures as a big deal. Edit: speaking only from the perspective of a US citizen. Though most citizens in European countries also don’t make near that. Edit 2: realized original wording comes off as aggressive
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 07:51 PM
51

I’m honestly always shocked when women on this sub say 6 figures is no big deal. I always imagine they must live in San Francisco or Manhattan. Though I agree with everything you said besides that point. To many(if not most) women that kind of salary is a massive deal and a lot of good careers will not get a person there. I’ve rarely even meet people making 6 figures in any age group. It’s a life changing amount of money. Of course none of that is ever worth a N/LVM. Having said all that, being …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/21 07:40 PM
7

When I was a kid my mom only allowed 5 minute showers. Idk what my brothers did but I learned to just go crazy with the soap everywhere as fast as possible. It was conditioning my hair I hardly had time for… and I used to wonder why my hair was so frizzy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 04:12 PM
11

There are VERY big differences between certain brands. It's ignorant to say that any one will just be fine, and insulting that you're implying that trying multiple options is stupid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 05:59 AM
11

Ah I see what you mean. Ya, for that reason I tell partners I have oral herpes. At least so far not a single one has cared(though now that I think about that it’s even more reason for women to be cautious. They don’t care)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 12:36 AM
20

Unfortunately, from what I’m aware, herpes is basically impossible to test for without an open sore. A blood test may tell you a person has herpes but not where on their body it is. I grew up being told hsv1 was oral and hsv2 is genital. I think it still trends this way but you can have either one anywhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 08:26 PM
1

I think you’ve missed my point again. I’m talking specifically about working a minimum wage job. Yes childcare would be needed if she worked that job, but doing so would usually be no benefit to her. I know a handful of mothers who work minimum wage jobs. And if their husband makes enough they always end up quitting or insanely stressed out. It’s terrible pay for the benefit of not being with their kids. If she is depending on her husband in the first place it was likely to be able to take care …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 10:05 AM
1

My point is that taking a minimum wage job wouldn’t help take care of herself unless he actually left her. While still in the relationship with no sign it is near an end it would only add more for her to do for zero gain. That is, unless he agreed to pay for childcare completely and she saved every cent of her pay. But at that point the relationship has no benefit to her if she has to do that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 11:42 PM
7

Except if a woman does have kids and a minimum wage job then everything still depends on the man and she’s even more exhausted. At least in the US this would be true as that minimum wage job would just cover childcare. In that case it doesn’t really benefit her. Though I completely agree when there is a career or skill a woman has that needs to be kept up with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 10:39 PM
11

I never knew any of this and find it fascinating. Question to you though, is the idea that women are powerful and “absorb energy” ever used to justify other things? It sounds nice on the surface but also sounds like it can be twisted into keeping women from all sorts of activities.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 07:24 PM
1

My uncles are like this. One is Alex Jones level crazy. And we just have to listen to him monologue sometimes for hours. With him no one will ever call him out because he is incredibly intimidating. Women in my family tread carefully around him for fear of angering him. It’s like he has no self awareness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 07:37 PM
10

Emotions are not the same as rationality. Logic doesn’t disappear in the presence of intense emotion. And the presence of emotions doesn’t make one irrational. So no, hormones do not affect rationality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 10:27 PM
20

I don’t think I could ever agree that post menopausal women are more rational. That just plays into the myth that all women are irrational because of hormones. I haven’t known any woman to become more rational after menopause, maybe just slightly more calm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 08:19 PM
23

I could be wrong but think that’s meant more for men. That a woman in her 40s is usually single by choice or circumstance, where a man in his 40s is single because no woman wants him for any number of reasons.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 01:14 PM
18

They aren’t the point is if they randomly get a call or text from a woman saying they had something then that is the only time they would bother getting tested. And many guys will still keeps numbers in their phones even if they don’t currently see that particular woman. The other day I had a man text me over a year after I last saw him! I had to ask who it was because I sure didn’t keep his number.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 08:55 PM
62

I’ve had several men actually admit to me they don’t/never have had an sti test because they just wait to see if a woman contacts him later telling him he gave her something. Edit: spelling
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 07:56 PM
54

Yup, this was me exactly. Luckily I learned very quickly that it wasn’t worth it, but I convinced myself I was having fun. Not a single orgasm. It still took me over a year after I last had a hookup to realize I did it to feel attractive. Then I realized I am attractive and I don’t need to prove it to myself by having sex with gross men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 07:53 PM
30

Gosh, this reminds me of a YouTuber I used to watch. He used this same kind of comment on a woman he was criticizing. I disagreed with her on everything she said but I could never understand why he thought his “joke” about her probably only doing missionary was supposed to be a bad thing. It’s like fighting against her internalized misogyny by... adding misogyny???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 04:10 AM
19

The people who yell about misandry will almost always defend these as well. I think the disconnect is thinking that if something happens then it is a problem of equal value. In high school I actually thought reverse racism was an issue because the messaging I received from family and tv news. It never occurred to me at the time that a black person hating white people really wouldn’t affect me in a structural way, everything is still to my advantage in regards to race. Whereas white hatred for bl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 04:26 PM
3

I’m confused about what you mean by ableism being a horrible reason to choose a donor. Do you mean it’s horrible to choose a donor on whether or not they have a genetic disability, or am I misunderstanding you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 04:08 PM
6

Holy hell, reading these comments makes me realize how lucky I was. I got my implant removed after about a year because of constant spotting, but it came out in less than a minute. I had no idea she even had take it out yet. I’d be horrified with these outcomes. I’m sorry you had to go through that and have doctors invalidate your own experience on it and other bc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 04:09 PM
15

Having enough money to live is a pretty low bar to set. I get he is your brother and you love him, but he is doing these things on purpose. Hell, I have one complete NVM brother and another that at least seems HV. I hope no woman ever ends up with the NV one, even if I do get along with him. Has he proposed or is he going to once he gets enough money? Does his girlfriend know how he is?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 09:55 PM
41

You shouldn’t feel sorry for his future wife, you should hope he never has one if he stays like this. He isn’t a child and does not need to be reminded to clean, he just doesn’t want to. If he is old enough to be saving for a home then he is way too old to not be cleaning up after himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 08:02 PM
6

Omg this is literally the first thing that popped in my head! No one ever believes a “just fine” from a woman, and they think it’s a sign she is silently angry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 09:24 PM
13

Damn, growing up I always heard it was 3 months of pay. Although I think that more applied to when a ring could essentially be insurance if something happened to the man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 01:19 PM
121

On the societal influence normalizing porn I think it’s relevant that likely most women here at some point tolerated porn use or even used it themselves. The culture made it so that you cannot disagree. It becomes part of common life in the same way that bingeing Netflix shows does. All harm is brushed under the rug. If we don’t tolerate men watching porn then we are constantly told that WE are the issue. I just can’t stand any of it anymore. I can’t stand men, and often women, dismissing what I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:51 AM
3

Oh wow, this is a great explanation. Thank you! A lot of the examples you gave have been things I’ve been thinking about in recent years as they become talked about more often. I grew up with pretty much all the bullets point you made. Now when I push back against these things with my family I’m a “liberal socialist” who has been brainwashed by college and Marxist propaganda. Of course none of that even makes sense but those idea are so deep of a belief it’s practically a religion. I still strug…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 11:12 PM
5

So not really a comment about the man but the actual content. What exactly does it mean by internalized colonialism? Internalized white supremacy I get, but I’m not sure I understand what colonialism mean in this context. I only ever thought of it as a way to describe a thing that happens/ has happened. When I google it I only get results for “internal colonialism” which isn’t on an individual level. Is it a way of saying privilege one has as a benefit of being part of the group that did the col…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 08:00 PM
2

Mid twenties here. In high school I would overhear girls talking about how they “needed” to get a Brazilian. I didn’t realize removing pubic hair was considered necessary until I was around 18 and then I felt embarrassed by it. I already was shaving the rest of my body starting at 11. Even then shaving arms was weird and I told no one, yet I was teased for having hairy arms...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 11:51 PM
3

With most of my friends that approach would likely work. With my sister, otoh, she already is on guard for me judging her. I’m not gonna lie, when we were younger I had a much harsher way of wording things, and she is very sensitive to things people say. So even if I use your example about walk dates and use your exact phrasing her response would likely be that I’m bringing it up because I don’t trust her judgement and think she is stupid. She is very insecure and I do my best to always compleme…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 07:47 PM
1

That very likely be what is happening. I wish that was what I was personally seeing more of, but my irl community is rather small and consists of family, coworkers, and friends. The black and hispanic people I’m around tend to just use other insults to describe those people. I do wonder if ‘karen’ itself is something people pick up more when they are online a lot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 07:40 PM
7

Something that reminded me of from the past. When I was still in high school and my sister started college she told me about how men treated her in ways they never did in the past. She said “wineandtrees, they give you a look that’s like they want to eat you” she was of course disturbed by that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 04:14 PM
29

And he still never fully admitted to it! It was always just “lunch” once a year for 30 years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 01:10 PM
3

I don’t disagree with your initial point and I’m aware that men will use that word for any reason, including the one I said. But that isn’t a word you can reclaim by laughing it away. It’s great that your sister can laugh it off but that doesn’t actually change anything. When men can catcall or harass a woman on the street and yells that at her, it carries a threat. It can carry that threat even with people you are familiar with. Someone who would be willing to degrade me for any little thing li…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:13 AM
10

I don’t think we can find ourselves sexy without the male gaze. Our entire idea of sexy comes from society. I find the biological argument ends up too flimsy. It sounds right but when you look at how beauty standards change across cultures and time periods it’s impossible to tell what is “natural”. And that is just referring to beauty standards relating to body type. If we are just taking about women then it seems across cultures the hip to waist ratio is important to men. But I don’t know how t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 02:36 AM
3

I honestly wonder if your younger sister and her friend might actually be doing themselves more harm that way. Boys and men do not use that word as anything other than an insult. So using it to describe behaviors that would be praised in men would seem to reinforce those stereotypes. I don’t know if I’m wording this correctly. So for example a boy calling an assertive, cunning, and smart girl a b**ch. Then that girl calling herself that same thing for those exact traits. I think instead those tr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 02:25 AM
12

I keep seeing this argument about the original use of “karen” every time this issue comes up. Honestly I don’t get it. At least with “pick me” a human name isn’t being used (I can’t stand pickmeisha). I also haven’t seen it being misused yet in the way you’ve seen it used. But with Karen I have not seen it used to describe racist white women since I first started hearing it. In the beginning it was only that, or entitlement towards store workers. Now the vast majority of the time I see it used i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 02:16 AM
27

Okay, so I may be too late in commenting for this to be read. But when this topic comes up a specific quote comes to mind. And I’ll add it as I think the majority of commenters have misunderstood this post. “ Male fantasies, male fantasies, is everything run by male fantasies? Up on a pedestal or down on your knees, it's all a male fantasy: that you're strong enough to take what they dish out, or else too weak to do anything about it. Even pretending you aren't catering to male fantasies is a ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 11:18 PM
29

Shaving habits in the west absolutely do exist because the patriarchy though. Yes hair removal has been around forever in different societies and for either sex. But in our current society (if you live in the west or a place heavily influenced by western beauty standards) it exists for women only. Our whole bodies are expected to be hairless, while men sometimes shave their faces. It is very relevant that women did not shave before the 20th century (again dependent on culture). Leg shaving came …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:56 PM
61

The issue is you can lose them if they take offense. I’m dealing with this with my sister at the moment. I throw out certain things that she eventually will do but other things get her annoyed. I’d rather go the route of making her think about it herself in the form of a question and then asking me why I think a different way. She is more indoctrinated than I was, and far more dependent on mens validation. If I put things too bluntly I’ll be dismissed outright as judging her rather than the man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:25 PM
20

That as well! It was clearly bad enough that there were people who made a separate cf sub that wasn’t going to have any of that language. I understand children can be annoying, but I have never come across anything in life that pissed me off as much as some of them were. I felt a lot of those stories about kids were exaggerated or distorted to make the op look like they are victims.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 04:01 PM
59

I do kinda hate the cf sub though. Maybe it has changed since I last ventured there, but it was a misogynistic hellhole last time I checked. Pick mes can be childfree, and a lot of women there were just that. When the misogyny is pointed out I only ever saw the defense of it being “just joking” or about a particular kind of mother. If it was just about living your best childfree life with the occasional rant I would've loved it. But I couldn't get past the constant body shaming and name calling …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 02:13 PM
9

No, the downvotes are because she is extremely rude to commenters. No one has actually disagreed with her, just clarified the position, then she basically calls them stupid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 01:14 AM
3

I once had a guy friend mad that a woman he knew wrote a paper criticizing Fight Club, and claimed she hadn’t really watched it. I will never understand why so many guys love these movies to the point it’s part of their personality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/21 06:06 AM
11

If it’s not that movie then it will be Fight Club. Bonus if he mentions both, which I find happens too often.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 05:26 PM
11

It’s so strange to me you say this, because it made me realize I did the same exact thing. In high school I had strictly enforced boundaries and pretty much assumed every guy was a sleaze. Then around 20 I got pulled in HARD to the view that my boundaries were “uptight” and that I was “repressed”. Even when they’d say something blatantly sexual I’d excuse it. I think at the time I was reading a lot of blogs/advice columns about communication and men’s feelings, blab, blah, blah. I thought they f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 05:25 PM
6

Oh god, I knew immediately what movie you meant. I also went to wiki and I couldn’t understand how anyone could ever believe the director. It was very clearly made from someone’s sick imagination and using the most nonsensical justification.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 12:07 PM
15

Ah, that does make sense. Unfortunately the men I meet my age (mid-late 20s) seem to be stuck in a forever teenage mindset. Seems the only place I’ve ever met datable men was at university.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/21 07:21 PM
57

I wonder though whether that would be a good idea long term. Those men in their late 20s may turn into the same gross men you’re finding in the 35+ age group. Might be better to find men who you know will maintain their appearance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/21 01:49 PM
13

I find it fascinating that your body alerts you like this. I’ve never know a woman that has ever lost her period for anything other than being severely underweight or a hormonal issue. No matter what I do my period is like clockwork (unless I’m on bc but then it normal again right when I go off it). Though if I did have that happen then I’d probably end up continuing the unhealthy habit instead of fixing it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 11:34 AM
13

I really wish I lived during a time where the harassment wasn’t considered normal. It sets women up to accept the worst behavior. I’ve never even actually had a man ask me on a proper date. Walking, hiking, coffee, etc, but never dinner in a nice place. Even my ex never took me on a real date. 😒The crap I used to tolerate...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 08:04 PM
46

It did mention though that under 35s are used to this behavior, and over 35s who are getting back into dating are finding it shocking. If they have the experience of dating pre-apps then they recognize it for what it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 03:55 PM
17

Reading this kind of crap puts me in such an awful headspace. I literally have a difficult time letting men into my life because they might think this way (and often it ends up that they do). Absolutely everything said in that post has such an easy rebuttal yet so many people will accept that because they don’t ever want to question their own habits. I actually used to watch porn, and then feel guilty after. I analyzed why and came to the conclusion that I couldn’t deny the women that I was seei…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 11:42 AM
10

Some years ago I toyed with the idea not of stripping, but camming (only because I knew I couldn’t dance that way). So if bettydraperapologist’s friend is anything like I was then it’s more about feeling desired. I associated being desired by men, even gross men, as empowering. Since I spend a lot of time online, I constantly got the message that it was empowering. This only really changed when that same year I learned how men really felt about ons. I thought casual sex was just a fun time two p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 12:10 PM
1

I don't think they are bad words either. I do see where you are coming from and will admit that the way men use it does affect how I see it used when another word would do. At the same time, it did come off as disparaging to me though I figured you did not mean it that way. I watch my own language in regards to this because I found myself automatically making women seem less than with my speech even when I didn't feel that way. I am sorry if my comment came off as a personal attack at all. Latel…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 02:31 PM
3

But you understand my reason for asking? ‘Girl’ would accomplish that. It’s just that your second sentence following the first comes off as though you do really see boys as better to raise, however unintentional.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 05:43 PM
10

Might be a small thing. But why refer to a girl as a ‘female child’ but not a boy as a ‘male child’?This isn’t a criticism, and you probably didn’t even realize it. It just came off as very strange to me, like how “there are men and females” sounds. Edit: punctuation
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 09:05 AM
13

Yup, to them it’s the wife's fault for not wanting to be degraded, and a prostitutes duty to be degraded.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 12:09 AM
8

Oh god, I used to read his column in highschool and thought I needed to be GGG for a future partner or else I would be seen as a prude. I had no other influences that told me anything else was acceptable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 12:08 AM
38

Went to goodreads to check out her book just now. First negative review had this gem: “ She talks about "depravity" and puts down kinky johns. Well if they could tell their wives about their harmless quirks maybe they wouldn't need to see a prostitute?” “NEED” a prostitute? Can they not see how ridiculous this is? A man just neeeeds his kink entertained or he’s basically being abused.🙄😤 It’s sad so many people think this way. Well now it’s going on my reading list.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 10:18 PM
19

To your last paragraph, it really depends. I had great sex with my ex lvm and had a much higher sex drive than him. This tends to be the majority of women I know. They stay with crappy men because of how much they enjoy the sexual aspect of the relationship. I do have a couple asexual friends and I often wish I had the same lack of interest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 08:08 PM
4

Have you taken care of a 3 year old for a significant amount of time? If you have then maybe. If not then you are underestimating the work it takes. These children had lives before their adoptive parents, they aren’t blank slates. Toddlers and small children with trauma need real care. Maybe I’m taking this too seriously but there are a lot of comments in this thread that seem to suggest one can adopt a child and just put out some food and the child will be super grateful. Or completely ignoring…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:19 PM
11

I understand it’s a hypothetical but there would just not be enough babies for everyone to adopt, or even older children. And from what I see it is far easier to adopt an older child if a couple has already had experience raising there own. Starting out with, say, a 3 year old would be disastrous for in almost every situation. Adopted children may have issues from a previous home life that the adoptive parents can’t deal with. They deserve love from adults who will understand how to best care fo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 01:22 PM
11

My sister is currently doing Muay Thai and got super into it very quickly. Seeing her become more confident in herself is now making me consider trying BJJ. I hate feeling so physically vulnerable. And might soon take up a family member’s offer to learn how to shoot. But I do for sure look at random items at home and think “I bet that could work if needed”!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 09:04 PM
62

Steel chopsticks and high heels would not be a good weapon unless you have some element of surprise or are very well trained in fighting/combat. Anything that requires you to get that close to an attacker is likely to just be taken from you and used against you instead. If an absolute last resort where you may die anyway sure, but everyone should know it can backfire on them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 12:39 PM
2

I get where you are coming from, but please do not suggest dating women if it is “not an ideal choice”. Bisexual myself and I don’t see either sex as being of lesser relationship value. I’d feel crushed if another woman only dated me because she was settling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 12:45 PM
24

I wouldn’t really say surviving war made them appreciate women more, especially with the rampant rape that occurs during wars. Hell here in the US men that have gone to war are practically worshipped, and women are told to appreciate(worship)them for it. Plus the women who are partnered with these men will likely end up the man’s therapist and/or possibly be killed by him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 12:27 PM
6

Ah I see that now. Though yeah, still doesn’t make sense. It’s still an intimate act, just one that some people treat casually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:08 PM
10

Ah I see. I agree that women are plenty capable, and can get shit done even if we need another woman to assist sometimes. And I often think the helplessness is an act on many women’s part in a misguided attempt to flirt with men(though society does tell us that weak women are attractive, so I can’t blame them). I guess I wouldn’t say the strength difference is extreme but it is large enough to where it affects almost every aspect of life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:21 PM
50

I want to understand the thought process of the “casual sex exists” comment. These prostituted women aren't having casual sex with a person of their choice that they are attracted to and getting paid. Is that really what pickmes think sex work is?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:53 PM
21

How tall are you exactly? Because the muscle difference does end up being very significant for most average people. Here’s an example. I briefly worked in a warehouse. Heavy and constant lifting for sometimes 12 hours. About 70 men and I was one of two women. I never met the hourly goal and was physically incapable of fully doing the job. Meanwhile men who smoke and video game all day on their off days are chucking 70 lb packages of meat around all day like it’s nothing. I’m also very short, but…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:45 PM
3

I’d actually say that in the last case the guy did do something wrong. You could leave someone for simply being incompatible. Telling someone you’re leaving her because she smells is just cruel. Especially if the smell isn’t from a lack of hygiene or infection. I’d personally have an extremely hard time dating again if I thought I just naturally smelled repulsive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 12:21 PM
97

You can also decide you don’t want to do something without ever trying it. Which I think is an equally important message.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 10:11 AM
7

It’s insane how many people I saw do this. Made no connections and think the degree itself does all the work. But I really can’t say shit when I failed out after my second year. That’s a massive regret of mine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/21 04:52 PM
14

My guess is he went to college for something that he can’t turn into a career. Then he probably joined a union. All trade unions near me have a 5 year apprenticeship, so that could make sense with his age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/21 10:13 AM
11

😩That used to be me just recently. This sub is what changed my mind. Four years with a nvm who didn’t want to celebrate any holiday or birthday! I told him it was fine because “I’m not the romantic type”. I suppose it was easier to convince myself I didn’t care about those days than to realize he didn’t care about me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 10:11 AM
16

Wait, there are people who idolize Bojack and Mr? Do they not realize how tragic and/or awful they are, or do they like that?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 07:18 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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