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wouldbepandananny Archive

View 3 posts and 463 comments by wouldbepandananny on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

You title sentence is incorrect. Women may report stronger feelings associated with rejection, but it's men who react more poorly in general. Having or reporting stronger feelings is not indicative of how that individual responds within the situation. We don't complain that a man experiences his emotions too strongly- the criticism is only leveled at the behavior a rejected man engages in. Adding an article you might like- rejecting unwanted advances <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:55 AM
–

Again- noting trivial facts does not indicate a fondness or even tolerance for whatever/whomever is being described. You might tell me you hate birds, but acknowledge they are better at flying than humans. Doing so would be irrelevant. Noting a skill, ability, strength, whatever doesn't indicate the existence or absence of sexism/bias. You see how that makes no sense- right? You are accused of thinking women are inferior, and your retort is "nuh uh; women eat more balanced diets and can see lots…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:18 AM
1

There are a lot of things that society has agreed on that are absolute garbage. Here is something to consider: I do believe that women also get a feeling of validation by attracting a man, though I can agree that this is a less intense/prominent feature for women as compared to men. It also manifests itself differently- because this feeling of validation is not won just through having a dude indicate he finds you physically appealing, but having that dude be attracted to the things we value most…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:11 PM
1

Women are too then.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:35 PM
1

I don't understand your comment; when you say "she" are you referring to me, the OP, or the woman who was quoted in the original post? And, the other part I really do not understand at all. You know that quote from some comedian saying "women, pets, and children are loved unconditionally" or something like that? And you see women push back on that, since we often do not feel loved (whether it is being victims of sexual violence, other violence, folks trying to take away our rights) - but that th…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:16 PM
1

In what way does listing trivia about average abilities broken down by gender indicate that you don't view women as inferior? Having generally better perception of colors is not the stuff dudes are referencing when they (the dudes who do this, not dudes in general) suggest women shouldn't vote. Similarly, me stating that men have an easier time developing muscle does not mean that I am sexist/not sexist. What Women Want is horrendously sexist, it bums me out that it's a "top grossing" film. I do…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:02 PM
2

This was a grammatical mess. My favorite part was your criticism of all women filmmakers & directors, saying they either don't focus on men at all or portray men as villains or the butts of jokes- and without taking a breath say it's sexist to suggest men are incapable of making content that caters to straight women. Why was that my favorite? Because the poster you responded to provided a great deal of accurate and well-articulated information. Then you proceeded to be sexist in a myriad of ways…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:18 AM
1

"Women care about personality, but only if they have time to learn your personality." "If the only thing a woman knows about you is what you look like, she will assess her attraction based on that- the only piece of information she has." I mean, that's not just Women, that's everyone...
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:44 AM
1

I'm not certain you are correct about women not "simping" for men. Large parts of society are based on watching men- in fact an entire "sport" was developed tmake it more socially acceptable: cheerleading. Men have much higher viewership re: sports, are more often to be main characters in TV, movies, and (historically at least) books. Men seem to get bored watching women do anything, unless they are doing something in skimpy clothing. In a superhero movie, or video game, a female character could…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:08 AM
2

Don't you think feeling like they have inherent value (knowing that they have inherent value, and feeling that this is meaningful- that they don't have to perform a certain way or produce something tangible) would go far in terms of making many of these men feel much less lonely and isolated? A lot of men specifically want a romantic partner for the following reasons (aside from regular sex): they want someone who they can be themselves with, where they can be emotionally safe enough to be vulne…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:43 AM
1

Yeah, I think that has to do with temperament, as well as environmental factors. My brother was out smoking pot, yelling at my parents, stomping around, slamming doors, and being bitchy. At least as bitchy as I was. I wasn't more regulated, but far more anxious, so internalized all of my hormonal behavior, where he externalized his. I hid out, stayed out from underfoot. Cried a lot, but not where parents could see it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:27 AM
2

That makes me think such people have never been around a teenage boy. They have significant angst. It may present differently (i.e. wanting to bang everything that moves rather than crying a lot) but it's still angst; and they still have all the typical insecurities.... shrug
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 06:26 PM
1

I quite like it and fully agree. A lot of times when expectant parents say they hope they have a boy because they are "easier" what I hear is they have to do less parenting because parents don't feel they need to cherish and dote on their boys the same they do girls, which is absolute garbage.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 02:06 PM
1

Tell me what "high ability and effectiveness" look like in dating/relationships. Ability refers to specific behaviors; what are the behaviors, specifically, and how does one perform them well? What do those same behaviors look like when performed poorly? And what does it mean to be "effective?" What does effectiveness look like? Provide an operational definition of each, and provide examples to show that those "abilities" that you clearly define lead to actual relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:44 PM
1

I mean, equality of opportunity and meritocracy are absolutely related. But they are not relevant to this post. Professional athletics are a decent example of meritocracy; if there were equality of opportunity, it would be nearer to perfect. OP's point, again, is thaty ou cannot put in enough effort to guarantee a relationship; and just because you look good on paper, doesn't mean anyone will be attracted to you. Men and women do not choose their partners based off meritocratic features- is tale…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:28 PM
1

Merit absolutely refers to effort. Meritocracy sort of relates to equity, but more so to equality of opportunity. The idea that we all have the same opportunity, and your talent + effort will determine your level of success. Again, being naturally attractive, having a medium level of fitness and hygiene versus an unattractive person who tries really hard-- the first person will have more luck dating. That is OP's point. There are some short-comings that you cannot overcome with effort. That's th…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:11 PM
1

Not all men prefer slender women, or long hair. People, on average do prefer symmetrical faces; the .8 ratio of waist to hips- that sort of thing. Not all women prefer extremely muscular men; some absolutely do; some like skinnier men; some like men with more cushion. And our bodies are different; some dudes have an easier time putting on muscle; some dudes stay skinny despite eating 3,000+ calories a day. And some women are into that. As I mentioned- you can enhance your physical attributes and…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:05 PM
1

I am not being obtuse, I am genuinely confused because you are AGREEING with OP's post, but you are commenting like you do not agree. Being attractive is very important when it comes to dating. We know people with certain body types, symmetrical faces, the ability to acquire muscle mass etc., are all viewed as more attractive -- but having a symmetrical face for example is not something you earn. The entire post is stating that you cannot simply put forth enough effort thinking that is guarantee…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 04:46 PM
2

OP is not saying that wealth, connections, etc., do not hold weight with regard to being successful. She is stating, CORRECTLY that being born into wealth, being born into a connected family are not things that you EARN. A merit-based system is one in which your efforts are rewarded through hiring, promotion, access to opportunities. She, in fact, is saying those things do matter, and thus we do not live in a meritocracy. Think about it like a job. You want to apply, indicate your skills, maybe …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 04:35 PM
1

I have posted the definitions; it is not up to me to handhold your way over to viewing them. Demonstrated abilities, like doing "attractiveness" better than anyone else. Can you show me how you "do attractive?" and what skills you use to do "attractive"? Feel free to link a video of you or someone practicing the "attractive."
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 03:19 PM
1

Get real.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 10:58 AM
2

No, you can't.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 10:39 AM
1

Dude. Learn to read. Go assess your reading comprehension skills. You sound like an idiot lol
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 10:38 AM
0

Honestly- read the definitions I helpfully googled for you, or find a dictionary.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 10:37 AM
0

You don't "earn" dating success by "being more attractive." Do you hear yourself? Plus, being attractive doesn't make you more suitable. Nor does it guarantee success. Go troll someone else with your misuse of the English language lol
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 10:35 AM
2

That's not what that means. Being attractive isn't really a talent. But that's beside the point. You don't "earn" being attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 10:32 AM
3

Yup.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 03:40 AM
4

And listen- I get where you are coming from, using merit as a synonym for "value" - but OP was using the term meritocracy, referring to a merit-based (or skills/effort-based) system- so the usage as a noun isn't relevant to this conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:23 AM
3

Just acknowledge you were wrong bro. Being corrected isn't a big deal. Refusing to learn, digging in your heels, insisting you are correct when you aren't is a waste of time. Do you really want to be as smart today as you are ever going to get? If not, be open to learning new things. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:18 AM
2

You didn't do a great job reading or understanding the definition. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:11 AM
0

It's literally at the very top. I've highlighted it for you. Thank me later. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:08 AM
2

No way dude. You are using it correctly-they aren't. They think "being hot" is (they try to use this as a noun, which gives me the heebie-jeebies) "a merit" (whatever tf that means). Anyway, you are stating that you can work hard to illustrate you are a good/ would be a good partner, but may still not have any takers; that's how things work, because dating IS NOT A MERITOCRACY- just like you said. You are right, and it's unclear why your point appears to be controversial (beyond people thinking …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:04 AM
4

That's what it actually means ❤️
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:58 AM
6

It's no wonder people on this platform are always fighting. In order to have a proper debate we must be working from a similar framework, which means using words correctly, according to their definitions. Being good-looking is not merit-based. Traits, by definition don't having anything to do with "merit." Merit primarily refers to the quality of being good, worthy, or deserving of praise, reward, or attention. As a verb, merit means to be worthy of or to earn something through action, performan…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:57 AM
12

Because the words "merit" and "meritocracy" have actual definitions. Merit refers to earning something. Being attractive isn't something you can earn. You can perhaps enhance attractiveness or de-emphasize unattractive features- but being physically attractive (or unattractive) is not something you "earn." <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:49 AM
2

Try not to pay most of these dudes any mind. They don't know what a meritocratic system is. They think existing while being attractive and succeeding as a result of being attractive is meritocracy in action. 🙄 In short- you made very good points, but a few dudes seemingly cannot parse what you are trying to communicate, and put their own spin on it (a spin completely separate from anything you actually said) and then respond to that lol, thus making themselves mad over nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:27 AM
0

Women don't do that writ large. Dating someone with the intention of hurting them is true antisocial behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:18 AM
-2

You don't interpret it differently- that dude just doesn't know what the term means, and therefore he cannot correctly interpret what you are saying. Your usage was correct; his, not so much lol
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:16 AM
18

A meritocracy is a social, educational, or professional system in which individuals advance, succeed, or gain power strictly on the basis of their abilities, talents, and effort. In a true meritocracy, factors like wealth, family connections, race, and gender are meant to hold no weight, contrasting directly with systems like hereditary aristocracy. OP knows what meritocracy refers to. You are misusing the term. Being attractive =/= merit. You could argue that she has skilled makeup application,…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:15 AM
-4

What in god's name makes you think "women don't have to do anything"? Women are expected to wear makeup (but not too much! It's catfishing/fake/men don't like that!); we are expected to wear specific clothing- not slutty, (but don't be a prude, but accentuate your curves, but don't show cleavage!); we are expected to laugh whenever a man thinks he's being funny, (don't be sensitive, it's just a joke you are the butt of), and we should not ourselves be funny! And we should be smart (but not smart…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 01:07 AM
0

I don't think any logical or rational person believes this. The only people who would tell themselves they are "too good" for potential partners are doing so to keep their self-esteem intact. Which is, perhaps, the problem. If we need to either receive attention from the gender we are attracted to OR be convinced we are "too good" for them, we don't actually have our own identity; our entire sense of self is determined by how other people respond to our "wiles." If you can identity your core val…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 03:13 AM
2

We (liberal women) don't struggle in dating. Conservative men struggle to date because women don't want to spend time with- or have sex with- someone who want to take their rights away.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 11:51 PM
1

The reference to Reddit simply stated the forums where these discussions occur. The statement noting reality linked to a research study. https://datepsychology.com/the-myth-of-the-alpha-widow/
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 04:09 PM
5

Most modern women? That doesn't even make sense. What are you even basing this on? Looks like anyone with any expertise in the area of relationships says this idea is an absolute myth. Get out of the manosphere, my dude. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 10:44 AM
1

"Girls." Men shouldn't be making sexual advances on "girls" at all. EDIT: also, the entire premise is "men treat hoes differently. " now you say women (well, I say women, you implied children, but whatever) who dress in revealing clothes, but not necessarily hoes. You know what that means, right? That, as I mentioned, the word is insufficiently well-defined for a debate. You don't even agree with your own assertion, since you keep backtracking on calling these women "hoes." Which, again, is the …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 04:59 AM
3

If it were unconscious you wouldn't be so quick to assert it as true. Dudes I know flirt with women they think are cute/attractive, interesting. They would not flirt with her on the basis of thinking she's "a hoe." Anyway, again, "hoe" hasn't actually been defined sufficiently for a debate.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 04:04 AM
5

I don't even know what being a hoe means in this post. The gal who made this post sort if implied dudes treat them shittier, are more pushy, flakey, manipulative. Then she tried to backtrack it, so who knows. How we treat people reveals our core values. Treating someone differently because we assess them as a "hoe" implies something negative. If a guy tells me he is flirting with me because "I'm dressed like a hoe," how exactly do you think I would interpret that statement?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 03:49 AM
1

Sounds like you sprained something there homey. Unless you'd recently gotten a vasectomy or a kick to the testicles, that is not normal. Glad you went to the doc!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 03:40 AM
6

Men who mistreat a woman because he interprets her as being a hoe (whatever that even means) is generally actually pretty shitty to people in general; he normally doesn't realize that, and ends up "woe is me, why can't I get my dick wet, so sad." Now, some men who are extra manipulative will push harder if they think they can get away with it- but again, his treatment of another person says everything about him and nothing about the target of his behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 03:38 AM
2

Then men are to blame when nobody wants to date them because being with them feels like raising a child who you didn't birth who will never grow up. This post is exactly why women report choosing their own peace over a relationship. Choosing to be in a relationship means (ideally) a weighing of the pros and cons. The happiness, joy, security, safety a partner provides should outweigh their childish nonsense. Refusing to maintain a home (so you don't stink when you are out in public, so bugs don'…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 03:30 AM
1

I wish I could explain it to you dudes so you could more easily understand it- your obviously low standards make it LESS LIKELY that we will give you a shot. Why? Because we don't think you actually like US (or me, I guess). I catch a non-choosy guy's eye, I wonder what it is he saw in me that caught his interest, and then realize I just happened to be in his line of sight. It's nothing about ME that appeals to him. That's a guy who won't care if we are good for each other. That's a guy who will…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 01:20 AM
15

Also- you indicate "hoes" are treated differently...then you describe how YOU are treated differently than your friends, IMPLYING they are hoes and you aren't...but then indicate you are a hoe. If you are going to draw a distinction, you have to include both hoes and non-hoes in your post. For the record, the way people treat you is about them- not you. It may be the type of behavior you tolerate, which then determines your social group. So- dudes don't treat hoes/non-hoes differently; different…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:53 AM
0

FYI- blue balls aren't real (or at least are made to seem serious when it isn't) . Everyone feels physically uncomfortable when they are aroused without a proper release. "Blue balls" is a term used to exaggerate the discomfort to pressure you into doing something about it- as if it's "your fault." Sorry dudes. Secret is out.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:45 AM
10

Lol we don't.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:45 PM
1

They are fucking terrible. Maybe terrible in a different way than for men, but definitely fucking terrible.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 12:57 AM
1

Well, this certainly debunks the idea that women only go for the top whatever% of guys. The apps are just a shitty proxy for a venue where we can get to know people. The apps suck, but it the modern era, there aren't really other good options. Maybe try starting a book club or something. Meet a nice, clever dude at a book club? Hell yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 12:51 AM
–

Found a MUCH better source- But, fact remains- your premise is EGREGIOUSLY flawed. https://mentherapytoronto.com/dating-apps-80-20-rule-men/
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 08:21 PM
–

So what? You are attracted to who you are attracted to. It's not my place to tell you that your preferences are "wrong." That would be flat out ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 08:05 PM
1

I'm not talking about perceived value, I am talking about actual objective value, which is equal to a man in my same circumstances. My value is NOT determined by a man's assessment of me. It's not determined by my subjective level of attractiveness. Your value, similarly is not determined by your attractiveness to women/others. Our value is not determined by how many people want to bang us. That's a societal myth that we've been brainwashed into believing. As living creatures we have baseline va…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 01:43 PM
1

Sure- that's a discussion. There are certain things that speak of a lack of effort that can affect a relationship. It may be related to physical appearance, but I have a sense it goes deeper too. What I mean by that is, when entering a partnership, such as marriage, we are a team that works for our mutual benefit, supports each other, each person making that effort to ensure the other feels loved and cared about. A way I can show my partner is by caring for my physical appearance. This may mean …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 11:43 AM
1

I can't speak to any of that. I've not tended to shame men for having or expressing a preference- EXCEPT when that preference impacts a woman they've already married and the criticism is that their pregnant or postpartum wife has gained weight, or something in that genre. As I implied before- I find your comments to be reasonable, even persuasive, and I'm hoping the men in here who are more antagonistic toward women are taking notes.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 11:08 AM
2

That is a good, thoughtful responses, and I find I don't disagree with any of it. When it comes down to it, what I take issue with is the idea that some seem to have that women can (and should) be either A) bullied out of their right to choose a partner- including the choice of no partner at all, or that B) society should revert back to times when women were required to pair up with a man in order to have any access to safety, resources, etc. Antagonizing women simply won't be effective. And if …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 10:47 AM
1

There are things I value- humor, intelligence, kindness for example, and these are characteristics I am unfailingly attracted to. And it is true that I would never be attracted to someone who is unkind with no sense of humor, and no intellectual curiosity. Different women have different priorities, but it really truly does come down to what your gut says. I hear a lot about how things function on the apps, and I don't really have good advice on that. I am kind of an odd duck, and the very brief …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 06:45 PM
1

...the only thing that dictates whether I date someone (who seems to want to date me) is if I am interested in doing so (i.e. attracted to them); I don't go through some imaginary checklist comparing my subjectively evaluated characteristics to theirs. Is this why dudes are mad? You imagine we become aware of your interest, and develop a resume for you based on what we assess to be your characteristics and run it through HR? lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 11:14 AM
–

Space Opera is LIFE!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:11 AM
–

Oh- I don't feel like topics that have no basis in reality require a full conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:10 AM
–

Says the guy who is displeased with the current state of affairs and thinks he can persuade women to tolerate nonsense by antagonizing them. 😆
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:07 AM
–

I love Children of Time, and the associated series. Currently working through Children of Strife. ❤️
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:03 AM
–

You will love this. Dudes are - statistically - more likely to perpetrate the behavior you are assigning to women. Is it projection? lol <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:59 AM
–

Most women think they are below average and have crippling insecurity lol Doesn't mean we're going to be with a dude we have no interest in.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:56 AM
1

Disagree.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:24 AM
–

Lol I find men to generally be very handsome, sexy, charming. Women who are straight and not Ace feel similarly.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 11:13 PM
1

You are maybe right. That topic is one many would not feel comfortable talking about, especially in a group; but we will see. Please observe that you are the one who has made assumptions within our conversation-- not me. You said you didn't know anyone who had been assaulted- I told you that, statistically speaking, you absolutely do. You used that as an "in" to mention that women can be assholes too- a point which I did not disagree with. I then provided evidence that indicates that the men in …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 03:12 PM
1

Hm, I don't believe the men in my life are acquainted with "misandry" as it is understood in these forums. At a minimum, it has never been something we have discussed-- though we have discussed the trials and tribulations in dating-- both meeting people in the real world and in the apps. When we discuss any of these issues it is to disparage people who wish to paint with a broad brush to describe another group of people -- which may mean gender, religion, socioeconomic status, disability, whatev…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:06 PM
2

Ok, there is truth in what you say, and I think that's my point. The idea that you have less inherent value based on being a man is false. We may have been brainwashed to believe that, and therefore people may act as if that is true, and the way you experience life may send the message that you have less value, but I don't believe that, and neither should you. I want you to know that, regardless of the shitty messages you are inundated with from media, society, the built-in structures of our cul…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 11:15 AM
1

Complaining about women does not indicate that average men are not dating. That 27% stat is noted in that article as well, so I guess you find that reliable. The oldest dudes in that study were just 30. I didn't have a serious relationship until I was 25, but I never felt like this was particularly odd. And I'm confused on who supports quotas. Is that something you support. I secretly think resumes should contain initials rather than a name that indicates demographic information and interviews n…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:48 AM
1

Generally speaking the "average" man has a partner. The percentage of self described male incels is about 27% (women are at about 14.4%). Absolutely 27% is distressingly high, but it indicates that the majority of men who want to date are able to- in excess of 70%.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:00 AM
1

For the record, I know there are women who believe themselves to be inherently more valuable by virtue of their gender, because society does view men the way you say- that men are somehow more expendable. I'm not arguing otherwise. I'm pushing back against that belief. I may or may not be precious. But if I am, YOU are equally as precious. Regardless of what society seems to believe- the reality remains that the baseline value of men is equal to that of women. Does that make sense?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 12:35 AM
1

K, well. I'm straight, no children, providing care to nobody- and regardless of what society has taught you, I am just as expendable as a man in that same situation. That is an objective fact.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 11:42 PM
1

What in bob's name are you talking about? This? <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 11:21 PM
1

What in the world are you talking about? Lesbian women? LGBTQ? Are you responding to a comment I haven't seen? Who exactly is lesbian or queer here?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 11:19 PM
2

I am considering making a shirt advertising my expendability. Not sure if "I'm Expendable" (short and sweet) is best, OR maybe "My Womb: Empty, Now and Forever." I figure if I have puff paint to work with, either option could be good. Honestly though- society needs to get it's shit together. Men are valued- by me, and most others with a tiny hint of empathy or compassion. Anything suggesting otherwise is bonkers. It's no wonder men's suicide completion rates are so high. You get the message enou…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:12 PM
1

The dudes who I'm very close with, we do enough sharing that I know they aren't treated like scum, as a general rule- but I doubt I would be privy to information regarding a potential for victimization. If they were, I suspect- depending on a perpetrator- such a thing would be even trickier to deal with. If it was a woman, dudes are supposed to be "ready to go, 24/7," and aren't taken seriously when such things are reported. Then, if it was a dude... well, I did know a boy (adolescent age at the…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:06 PM
2

I think that is generally true. It sucks. Dudes should be permitted to express a wide range of emotion without ridicule.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:40 PM
3

Ah, but I cannot bear children. And society is wrong if they view me as "less expendable." And let's reflect-- society is wrong about a lot of things. I am not responsible for caring for children, nor my parents or other family members; I am about as expendable as it gets.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:39 PM
1

It is not accurate to say that men are victimized at rates "only slightly less" than women- but we can agree that the rates of both/either are outrageously high and unacceptable. The prevalance of women as victims of sexual assault/rape does not negate the problem of men being victimized (and same, vice versa).
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:37 PM
1

<image>
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:36 PM
0

The way your sentence came together, it makes me wonder what you mean be patriarchy. How do you define patriarchy, and what would serve as evidence that it either does or does not exist in the US (if that is where you live)?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:31 PM
2

That's true- about Switzerland. I hate that 😭
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:23 PM
0

At what point did I make assertions about your cluelessness? I will ask my dudes at D&D Club, see what they think.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:22 PM
1

<image>
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 02:41 PM
2

Saying that women are "too selective," that their standards are "too high" does imply that. But aren't you seeing some of these other responses-- suggesting state-mandated enforced monogamy; isolating women from society unless they hitch their wagon to a man? So clearly some folks DO think that.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 02:19 PM
1

I am glad you found a person who suits you.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:56 PM
1

Generally those actions stem from feelings. The odds of someone who has no positive feeling for you being down to clown on the regular- not super likely.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:50 PM
1

The US likely has higher birth rates because of the income inequality that you meantioned - where folks with fewer resources and options have more children, as they lack needed supports for more thoughtful family planning. I guess that gets to the question of - is it enough to just have a bunch of kids, which may or may not be wanted - or should we have kids who we can take good care of? But that is well outside the scope of this conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:49 PM
4

Cool; so guess that means these changes will not have a significant impact. Your premise is based off of a deeply held belief of women's basic inferiority to dudes. That's a whole other thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:45 PM
1

I cannot speak to the creepy asshole women -- but the men in my life support one another, along with the various women in their life (partners, friends, family) without reservation-- which provides evidence that they are not systematically shunned or mistreated based on gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:42 PM
2

But why does a LTR give you the will to live, if you do not derive anything positive from it (or, the positives that most of us seek - support, respect, etc.), or at a minimum, do not need those "positives" to remain in that relationship; what is it about that relationship that benefits you? I understand becoming depressed to the point of contemplating a toaster bath -- but that must mean being in a LTR provides something meaningful to you; and it must be unrelated to the positives I have noted,…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:40 PM
4

You are not "leaving them alone to be self-sufficient." You are suggesting taking away a woman's ability to be self-sufficient.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:37 PM
1

Fair enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:36 PM
2

For me it is difficult to consider falling birth rates in those terms, as we are headed toward another mass extinction event, due to irresponsible use of planetary resources. I kind of feel like the planet is going to boot us off before falling birth rates really have such a pronounced effect as some people fear.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:32 PM
1

OK, but there are a billion reasons for that, that have nothing to do with any person's willingness or unwillingness to date. Having a kid is financially not doable for most folks (in the US -- if not elsewhere) who are within their reproductive years. In order to be more financially doable, both people have to work, which means childcare. If you don't have a trusted family member, that means big money - AND it means being able to trust that the most precious thing in your life is being taken go…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:30 PM
1

Now that I could not say. I know some women who have been in abusive relationships who are gun-shy, in terms of trying their luck on the dating scene, and so abstain-- but truthfully I do not know women in other circumstances who are just refusing to date. I don't count Ace women amongst these, since they are not actively refusing to date; they just have no interest in doing so (and of course they wouldn't have the motivation to bad-mouth men in the way you are saying, if I understand you correc…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:24 PM
3

I mean, for those of us in the US it is clear that this country is no longer concerned about being a global competitor. If that were important there would be more emphasis (i.e. funding) for education. And given the inexcusably high rates of infant and maternal mortality in the US - your premise, while reasonable, is not one that is shared (again, at least not in the US). If what you posit was a motivating factor for most, there would be an emphasis on prenatal care, birth - 3 year initiatives, …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:22 PM
3

OK, so this means, for you, a relationship with a woman has nothing to do about intimacy, support, shared goals, values, or anything like that. All of the primary reason for getting into a relationship do not apply to you; so why do you even bother? What is in it for you (that cannot be achieved with a fleshlight)?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:17 PM
1

lol "the fact that I also have a peen" - that tickled me
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:15 PM
4

That is an example of "going back" in many ways. Terrorizing women into coupling up in order to have anything resembling safety or security- that is not an option.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:14 PM
1

You absolutely know several women who have been sexually assaulted. They just have not shared that information with you. An estimated 30% of women will be physically or sexually assaulted in their lifetime; nearly half of all women (44%) report having experienced unwanted sexual contact; about 33% of women report having been reaped. The women you know just are not talking to you about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:12 PM
4

I agree with you. The vast majority of men and women seek that support, that intimacy, the companionship. There is a small-ish - but very vocal - group of men (and probably women, though I don't travel in those circles, so don't encounter it int he same way) who feel absolute rage at girls and women, throughout the lifespan, as though there is an organized plot to keep them from having what is "rightfully theirs." (Women as objects, women as property, etc.), and I keep trying to understand how t…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:09 PM
1

Certain men will point to misandry as a reason why women won't settle- but more often it is couched as evidence of misandry. Meaning, by not dating certain men, we are oppressing those men, by denying them access to sex - presumably.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:02 PM
2

In what way is a woman exercising her self-determination causing the collapse of the "developed world?" An estimated 27% of dudes and 14.4% of women who want to be in a relationship/wish to date report being unable to do so. Which means 73% of men who wish to have that sort of companionship are able to do so. That indicates that this issue - while more significant than I originally thought - doesn't really affect most men.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:00 PM
2

I'm sorry if it feels like I am being obtuse-- but it is unclear to me why women must pair up / why monogamy, is in your view, the only option. Monogamy is not required for the perpetuation of the species-- which is the only thing I can even come up with for why women "must" pair up. Can you explain the worldview from which your comment is based on?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 12:55 PM
2

Explain?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 10:34 AM
–

Whomp whomp.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:35 AM
1

Ohh ok, got it. Thanks for explaining!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:28 AM
6

Life is better without a romantic partner, given their actual dating pool. I didn't realize I had to reaffirm that this- like all things- was dependant on context. Besides, long distance is too hard, and Jason Momoa probably doesn't live anywhere near me (not my type, but it's cool if he's yours).
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:27 AM
0

The men I see every day in reality do not have any of these experiences you are reporting, indicating the phenomena you report is very isolated/not widespread.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:58 AM
4

Mostly I'm thinking of beliefs associated with the "manosphere." <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:51 AM
2

Is this a response to my comment or a previous one? It doesn't really apply to anything I said, so wasn't really sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:47 AM
2

I tried to code it as "Discussion," but it was re-coded as a question for men. While your question was rhetorical, the question was for anyone. 🤷🏻‍♀️ People with egalitarian views (i.e. feminists) do seem to have more insight, but participation is not restricted.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:49 AM
1

Absolutely agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:16 AM
6

This is an excellent point. I'm here for it. Ok, so society absolutely influences preferences, but I feel like the biggest impact on certain dudes not getting dates is women determining their life is genuinely better without a romantic partner. Women historically needed a man in order to participate in society, and having children was much harder to avoid, so a man was also needed for financial security. As a result women had to work harder to attract a partner, since their livelihood literally …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:13 AM
0

Very good point!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:43 AM
8

You think men can treat other men like cannon fodder, then use that unilateral decision to give men more rights/power? That makes zero sense. And you can phrase it however you want- you do think it's a reason for women to have fewer rights. You can frame it where every adult gets 1 vote, then men get 50% more. Then women have fewer rights... as compared to men. Words like more/less, fewer/greater- they only work when compared to something else. You think women should have fewer rights (than men)…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:42 AM
8

Women should have equal rights, regardless if the males in society (because- get real, it's always only men who keep it an "all-male draft," and who work hard to keep women out of the military). Men treating other men like cannon fodder is not an acceptable reason to keep women from having self-determination.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:22 AM
8

Dammit. I was wrong. I'm owning it. Finland has an all-male draft. Fuck. Oh well. At least I caught it early? Iceland, Norway, and Sweden do pretty well re: egalitarianism. Finland too... generally.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:19 AM
19

The all-male draft does not exist in any egalitarian (feminist) countries. Your point does lead into how much effort dudes put in to try and take women's reproductive autonomy away from us. Being angry and shaming women is a social tactic these men use to limit our options, shame us so we give up our reproductive freedom, so they may continue to have dominion over us. What I find interesting is a lot of these dudes basically just want women to not have options (including- and maybe in particular…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:11 AM
21

As a single, child-free woman, I am just as expendable.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:01 AM
0

Research doesn't really support your take- but more recent research suggests there is more nuance involved than just saying "women are more emotionally intelligent than men." https://www.researchgate.net/publication/257236324_Gender_differences_in_emotional_intelligence_The_mediating_effect_of_age
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 10:24 PM
15

100% I have met so many dudes that have that certain, special something about them; that...zest? zip? -- not sure exactly what it is, but it doesn't often translate well to the apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 07:08 PM
–

Women who outlive their husbands are in fact single at that point, in all of the ways that matter. But that is not even what the life-expectancy statistics are highlighting- the relevant point is that married men live longer than unmarried men, so how women are classified (single, married, widowed, etc.), is irrelevant; the comparison is men as compared to other men. At least that is the more relevant/meaningful statistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:43 PM
–

Or maybe this is more to your liking? https://qz.com/marriage-premium-men-women-health-wealth-longevity-051526
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:00 PM
–

Ok, done. https://www.americansurveycenter.org/newsletter/is-marriage-better-for-men/
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:58 PM
–

Does it trouble you that the majority of research on the subject suggests you are wrong?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:49 PM
13

Why are you conflating demographic features & a test that measures very specific cognitive abilities with whether men or women can be viewed as a "monolith?" I assume your goal is to be able to paint with a broad brush in applying your criticism of women. Even this idea you have bought into that women are a monolith is itself a criticism. But if asked, you would likely agree that people who live below the poverty line are not themselves a monolith; nor are people with similar IQs. Having more ho…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 10:35 PM
–

I'm much more likely to flake than my male friends- even those who are anxious like I am. Not sure if it's because I'm a woman, or if it's because I really just want to watch Star Trek with my cat... Edit: It might be worth mentioning that I an reasonably introverted, and existing in reality eats up most of my bandwidth in a way it doesn't seem to for my dude friends. Not sure if they are more extroverted, have more bandwidth, or if certain other aspects of life are more exhausting for me than t…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:23 PM
1

Your arguments lack internal cohesion. If you don't speak to women because you fear a rape allegation, I will remind you that false reports of rape mirror (statistically) false reports of other crimes (e.g., burglary). Meaning, if you don't rape someone it is statistically very unlikely an accusation would be made. If you recognize there are situations in which women become very fearful and act in such a way to reduce the fear of those around you (e.g., walking at night, noticing a woman walking…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 08:46 PM
2

lol same 😆
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 01:45 PM
1

I feel like your heart is mostly in the right place, and your motivations are good. I take you as a "problem solver" type person who becomes annoyed when a person complains about a situation where they do have some self-determination/ability to improve the situation, but appear to not be doing so. And I'm there. Generally I agree with you. BUT wanting our daughters to be safer and feel safer than we did growing up; wanting to accomplish tasks that require leaving our house, and being able to do …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 01:27 PM
1

Ok, but that implies there is a perfect level of vigilance that will keep women safe without encroaching on our freedom- and in a universe where the most likely perpetrators of violence against us are friends, partners, and family, you have to see that as being patently untrue. AND, perhaps this "ideal level of vigilance" is already being exercised by the majority of women, which is WHY our most likely perpetrator are known to us. We are largely doing what you've suggested - staying in groups, m…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 01:12 PM
1

I guess, but it seems like you are coming to the conclusion that men cannot be controlled, and therefore women must be controlled instead. That doesn't sit right with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 01:00 PM
1

I meant to ask- you said going overboard on being anxious/fearful is a detriment to society. What does going overboard look like, and in what ways is that detrimental? Genuinely uncertain what you mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 12:40 PM
1

But you state in your post that we SHOULD assume every man is a monster- by not meeting up with dudes through online dating without letting folks know where we are. And you are right. Your post is a call to women to both be more and less fearful. What you really want us to do is to 1) stop talking about the extent to which we are unsafe and feel unsafe (two different, but related concepts), and 2) stop being victimized (as if this is something completely within our control)- because the fact is …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 12:38 PM
1

Still waiting.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 12:12 PM
1

Feeling anxious IS A SURVIVAL INSTINCT. Listening to that anxiety IS A SURVIVAL INSTINCT. Are you trying to say there are insufficient opportunities for women to learn appropriate self-defense? That just about all organized activities that target survival skills (from boy scouts to martial arts) are geared toward boys and men, and that girls and women are made to feel very unwelcome in such spaces (often intentionally)? Because that's true. Are you also saying that because of the size and streng…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 12:03 PM
2

This could be the case for you dudes too, if you'd just date one another. Give me one valid reason why you don't/won't?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 04:14 PM
27

I suspect you are right. I know it's hard, and wish it wasn't. Women are raised to be mindful that some men would do us harm, given the chance- which we often learn is true through personal experience. And since there's no way to identify such men on sight, we tend to stay wary.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:50 PM
26

I think you are right, but I think spotting the Star Wars shirt, etc., may provide an opportunity for an attempt, just for a quick, pithy comment... if you have a favorite Star Wars quote for example. As a Star Trek gal, I like to try to work in a "make it so" or even "resistance is futile." Not easy, but enjoyable when the comment lands.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 03:21 PM
-1

They are if you are doing it right. 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 10:15 AM
1

This is not a gendered issue. Men are not comforted when you show them that women are at least as lonely as they are. Men don't feel better when you show them statistics on how much less work they do around the house, as compared to their wife, who works as much as they do and makes the same salary. Shouldn't they be relieved about their extra free time? The wage gap disappearing when you control for hours worked- false, when you remember unpaid labor (house-keeping, life-management for all with…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:42 AM
2

I think it's more that women can accept that we aren't everyone's cup of tea, and if I struggle to date, the reasons are likely to be varied. Then, there are a few very specific pockets of dudes- mostly having the common thread of disliking or disrespecting women, believing them to be inferior, and therefore their experiences and feelings less valid, relevant, important. But these groups have different strategies- some try a self-improvement kick, but only focusing on physical attributes; others…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:51 PM
1

If we disagree about who is a person, and what makes a person worthy of basic human rights... if I have to make a persuasive argument to convince you that you are supposed to LOVE people and USE money, not the other way around... that's not stupid. Also- telling people (women, in particular) that they are stupid for dumping sub-par men isn't going to endear you to them. We aren't "holding out" for "prince charming," we simply have enough freedom to maintain our own existence without requiring a …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:41 PM
2

😆 And if that same person told you to enter your PIN Number to access the "ATM Machine," since the N in PIN already stands for Number!
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:25 PM
5

I mean, for me personally- I find men, generally, to be very handsome and visually appealing. Women can be lovely, sure, but it's still, shrug. Women can't make me all tingly. So- that: the tingly-jingly feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 10:55 PM
0

The real question is- should we smile more? Think we'd be prettier if we did? The idea that all people with an egalitarian worldview walking around acting particularly snobby is ridiculous on its face. It is not egalitarian women who undermine men's issues- it's men- particularly men who don't believe in or want true equality. Good men know it is not the job of women to solve men's loneliness (just like it is not the job of men to solve the loneliness of women). There are a lot of good men out i…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 10:46 PM
2

ALL HAIL THE MAN, WHO GIVETH US ALL OF THE THINGS!
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 10:26 PM
1

Now tell feminists that we aren't sufficiently "grateful." 🙃
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 06:43 PM
3

I find your premise interesting, and for a very small minority of men, might be true. For a somewhat larger minority I understand that it feels true (and it will feel true, until it doesn't; iykyk). Keeping in mind that it is a losing battle to enslave women, that it is unethical to try and roll back women's rights, that kidnapping and abduction are illegal, how would you recommend men in this situation proceed?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/26 08:53 PM
2

Men who think women don't want clear communication tend to mistake clarity for abandoning all efforts at thoughtfulness. You can be clear without being a dick. And, it's worth noting: if you are a dude, and a male friend gives you a harsh truth with no thought as to how you will interpret it, likely you would be mostly fine with that. If your girlfriend/wife did the same thing, there's a good chance your take will be different. To reiterate: you are conflating clarity with thoughtlessness. If yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/26 08:44 PM
2

Let's say the same premise applies- too many matches is detrimental (regardless of gender)- what is the proposed solution?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/26 12:41 AM
-2

None of this is true.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 11:56 AM
-1

I fully agree with you on each point. This post is relevant and important as it could- if people allowed- provide a road map for more productive debates. It seems like many posts demonize an entire gender or demographic. If the post very specifically targets people who engage in a very clearly identified maladaptive behavior, you are accused of hating on an entire demographic, despite having very clearly avoided painting with a broad brush. It's unclear if folks just have extremely poor critical…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/26 12:46 AM
1

If men want to have more sex with more women, slut shaming is counter productive. And men are famously insecure about their dicks and sexual performance- so not a big leap.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/26 11:35 AM
1

You must. Nobody could be as delusional as you claim. Even assuming any part of your premise is reasonable (it's not), hot men who sleep around should be shamed, and only less attractive people would avoid the shame (since you claim sleeping around is easier for women than dudes, as if that should be relevant when determining if they should be shamed). The only reason dudes care if women have had multiple partners is related to insecurity. They worry they don't measure up (pun intended). That's …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/26 02:04 AM
1

Rage bait / Troll- don't engage. (Don't pay this person's bills).
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/26 12:11 AM
–

That dude is- at a minimum a troll, but most definitely gets paid for engagement. Even he can't be quite as dumb as his posts imply. I'm gonna discontinue any responses (starting now); I'm done paying that joker's bills.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 11:10 PM
–

Sure enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 05:47 AM
9

Here's your gender's proud history of restricting women's rights. https://nationalwomenshistoryalliance.org/resources/womens-rights-movement/detailed-timeline/ Are you embarrassed by the fact that if you are ignorant of a fact, you think it is not a fact? But that's not how facts work- they don't require you to be aware of them to still be true. I'm embarrassed for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:37 AM
4

You are the one unhappy with the state of affairs- go start men only island. No one is stopping you. But you won't. You are too dedicated to continuing your gender's proud history of oppression.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:34 AM
3

Another article, just for fun. https://uncommongroundmedia.com/the-historical-roots-of-men-silencing-women/
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:32 AM
4

Here's one for you. https://historycollection.com/13-things-women-werent-allowed-to-do-100-years-ago/
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:28 AM
5

<image> Little snip for ya
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:27 AM
7

And also- I understand if you have misgivings about ai https://www.brennancenter.org/our-work/analysis-opinion/government-has-long-history-controlling-women-one-never-ended#:~:text=Throughout%20modern%20history%2C%20government%20control,could%20be%20refused%20credit%20cards.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:26 AM
6

Nope I'm correct. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:25 AM
–

I'm not sure- I don't think so though because I couldn't follow your stream of consciousness narrative lol
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:09 AM
15

Yeah, since there's no way I could know anything about that. Always assume you know everything about someone. My dude friends who hang out also have anxiety d/o. Doesn't cause them to force women out of public life. Regardless, my point still stands. You are allowed to spend time with whomever you want. Are you mad about women invading spaces, or choosing the bear over men and their spaces? Mad because women don't want to spend time around men or because they do?? This goes back to the centuries…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:04 AM
31

Did you know you can ask a couple dudes to hang out with you, and just hang out with them? You don't have to invite anyone else. Sometimes my dude friends hang out with each other; watch sports, play video games. Nobody party crashes or has a problem. You can just hang out with whomever you want. It's bonks.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 02:04 AM
–

No disagreement- consequences motivates behavior- but imagining violence will yield good outcomes, when research has shown time and again otherwise, is foolish.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 02:01 AM
–

I doubt even you can follow the narrative you have laid out in your comment. There have been some reasonably thoughtful responses on this post, but it's all played out by now. I've been encouraged to let men continue to be authors of their own misery, if that's what they want to do. Just kidding. Mostly. And picking on someone for living in their own head? Maybe you should spend a bit more time in yours- be a bit more thoughtful; use your imagination. Maybe it'll make you less banal.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 01:59 AM
20

Why would you let other people tell you who you can be friends with. Even if women didn't want you to have male friends (they do- it gets you out of the house and they worry less about you cheating, as opposed to you having women friends), it would still be your fault for not having male friends. Besides- in this premise, you don't have a woman giving you partnership- so who is dictating who you can be friends with?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 01:52 AM
–

Understood.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 01:45 AM
1

You may be right.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 11:58 PM
1

Im thinking this is going to degrade into a discussion on moral relativism.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 11:28 PM
1

Just as an aside- what's deemed socially acceptable is not a marker for what is morally reasonable. Violence- or fear of violence breeds contempt; motivates specific behaviors to avoid that violence (sneaking around, avoiding the individual, planning escape), but not respect. I say this as someone who had a volatile and unpredictable parent, and who has been in the presence of aggressive men. Respect and fear are not the same, and- as it relates to someone physically aggressive- do not overlap. …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 11:22 PM
1

I'm on board re: policing our own gender. Your mention of men physically harming women to curb what you refer to as "toxic feminine traits" is alarming however. While it is illegal to do so (not acceptable in society, as you said), I cannot imagine what behavior could make violence ok in the context you have created. Defending oneself or others is acceptable; initiating violence on another person is not. What is an example of a toxic feminine trait you think deserving of physical violence? Hones…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 09:31 PM
1

You make a very good point actually. Another respondent made the point that we, as humans, tend to become frustrated by unmet expectations, yes, but also by criticism that we deem is unfair. I've been accused- and perhaps fairly- that I'm more tolerant of disparaging comments toward men made by women than the reverse. I suspect that's true, and I rationalize it that the comments women make that I agree with or am ok with contain reasonable critiques. Those I don't agree with (e.g. women requirin…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 09:16 PM
1

I treat men well in life- which is why I have many good friends, both male and female. I work to be cognizant of specific things men may need, but don't always receive in their day to day lives- specific compliments that are sincere; letting them know I value them, and some of the specific ways I value them. I make sure they know I respect them; that I'm proud of them when they've worked hard at something. I validate them in their frustrations- professionally, interpersonally, and with society. …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 08:41 PM
1

So the "bite your nose to spite your face" method of processing frustration? The thing is, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Society isn't just some amorphous, meaningless concept. Society is made up of people. People choosing to be shitty is what makes Society shitty, thus leading people like you do determine "because Society sucks, it doesn't deserve better, so I will make it suck more" - but that's why it sucks so hard to begin with. I'm personally not overly impressed with many aspects of soc…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 08:06 PM
0

I'm glad equality, egalitarianism are "en vogue." I'm certain it will soon become less fashionable to demand equal standing in society. It is curious that simply reminding A CERTAIN TYPE of men of our inherent humanity makes them furious. If you needed more evidence that you are the author of your own misery, there it is. I am a person. My existence has no purpose beyond what I determine it to be. Your frustration at not being able to control other people is understandable but futile. Give up yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 07:44 PM
0

You do better. When reading someone's words try not attaching intention to it that stems solely from your own personal baggage.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 07:35 PM
1

lol that's pretty funny. Nancy Drew, being a well-known adolescent detective- and the way you are using it suggests that it's obvious you are a dude and not a woman, and therefore not impressive that I found you out. You are, of course, correct. Identifying that you are clearly not a woman, just by the conclusions you (incorrectly) jump to, and the way you act so wounded on having misogyny exposed- your gender as a dude was not difficult to ascertain.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 04:48 PM
0

Dude- I'm sorry that your reading comprehension is terrible. That you didn't read the original post or didn't understand it. I'm repeating myself, because of your obvious misunderstanding. I didn't make my post with any presuppositions- just identified a likely reason for frustration and a solution. If that doesn't apply to you, you wouldn't be getting so mad. Suggesting women are people is not fuckery. If you think it is, you have some soul searching to do. I didn't berate men, and said nothing…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 04:44 PM
0

lol I love the men in my life - including but not limited to my partner. He would be a much more believable woman online than you, because he doesn't view women as caricatures, but fully realized humans. He is wonderful, thoughtful, handsome, and hilarious. But you are right, I won't stop dating or banging him (fyi, women can enjoy sex too! lol) But that's because he is the GD best. I am sorry that you are a subpar man. It is time for you to get a new account, since this one has been properly ou…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 04:15 PM
1

OK, very clearly your post is written from the perspective of a male who stays mad at women. You engaging in this type of role-play -- and doing it so poorly is kind of indicative of the problem we are seeing. It should not be controversial to suggest women are human people and should be viewed as such. I don't have to be the mouth piece for all women to make such a statement- and if you find it controversial, you should think about why. If you already think of women as people and treat them acc…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 04:10 PM
1

I have re-read your post. You are either not a woman at all, or you are so brainwashed that you go around "not like other girls." If you are over the age of 22, I would be shocked. But actually, your post reads like a 24 year old guy who lives with his parents, has poor hygiene, actively hates women, and thinks THEY are the problem for why he cannot get sex. Imagine, you as a "woman" telling an actual woman "women can love sex too fyi." That was your tell- in case you would like to masquerade mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:56 PM
-1

Are you dense? That is rhetorical- you obviously are. I am sorry your ex assaulted you. If you want to blame yourself for choosing a pos to date, that is on you. My personal history isn't relevant- but I've never been assaulted by someone I chose to date; guess that means I make better choices than you. Because here- you are showing it makes more sense to blame victims for being acquainted with their perpetrator rather than the perpetrator himself. The men I hang out with are exemplary. The men …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:53 PM
4

Show your sources about women being more abusive, given the definition you have shared. Research must have been done for you to come to such conclusions. Men are killed by other men- so the goal of getting men to be less violent serves that same outcome. Unless you are proposing it is the fault of women that men are killing each other- you men may have to figure this out for yourselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:43 PM
1

And yet, here they are on this sub. Seeing real-life consequence of men murdering women, beating up their girlfriend and wives, rape- and then all the men on every corner of the internet boo-hooing that they are "denied partnership" and in the same breath cheer over the rapes and murders, because "bitch probably had it coming" - it's not hard to conclude: men's hatred of women doesn't just stay safely in text or in conversations with other men. They act on it, and not infrequently. So, babe, you…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:28 PM
2

That implies that women as a whole have schemes to ensure said man is without a partner. That's not how it works.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:20 PM
1

lol
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:15 PM
–

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:15 PM
2

This is a very thoughtful take. Thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:09 AM
-4

This response is super embarrassing. Your lame ass fight club allusion, blech. Guess what- I can go crush it at work, then come home and ask my sweetie for a million smoochies, and for him to "baby" me. I can also give him that same level of devotion and doting. I can take accountability for my actions and still need affirmation from my partner that everything is ok. I can be independent, and still know I'm stronger with him at my side. Get used to the idea that people are complex; they aren't j…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 01:37 AM
3

I'm actually dismissing what you've said because it has nothing to do with my post. My post is that women are people and men who stay angry at women all the time seem to forget that. Your comment has nothing to do with my post. I tried to prevent this type of nonsense by indicating women should also acknowledge men as people- because they should, and because I knew people like you would come in to try and derail the conversation with your"...but women" talk. You want to talk about that, find ano…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 01:15 AM
1

A person who is employed in a role that requires specific tasks to be completed is not comparable to a woman not being attracted to you, or deciding she doesn't want to date. Frustration at someone for not performing the duties required by their job is reasonable. And it's not the feelings of frustration- it's constant barrage of of nonsense from men in an effort to keep women in what they see as "their place." Talking over women at work; the well-documented sexism experienced by women in the mi…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 01:10 AM
2

Those sentiments are neither common nor considered widely socially acceptable. However- women being hostile to men hurts their feelings; men's hostility to women, in contrast, is frequently deadly.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 12:50 AM
-1

Then this post doesn't apply to you. It's geared toward men who stay mad at women; not men who desire relationships with women. Desiring a relationship with someone of your sexual preference is good and normal.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 12:49 AM
2

Women talking with other women is not dehumanizing. Not giving someone her attention is not dehumanizing. Feeling unsafe around men is not dehumanizing to that man. We are taught by parents, teachers, and life experience that men cannot always be trusted. Statistics bear that out. I'm not sure why women ask men for help. When I've been in situations where I request male help it's usually specifically related to height or perceived physical strength...but normally I'll just get whatever tools wil…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 12:47 AM
1

Fair enough. I cannot express how disheartening it is that our continued pleas to be viewed as full members of the human race is discounted as cliché. That abandoning ideas on how they believe women should be might lead to less frustration, and more success in relationships, generally, and acknowledgement of women's basic humanity- all of that deemed a waste of time. Just bums me out.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 12:03 AM
1

It's gendered in the sense that frustrated men kill women- not really so common the other way around. The prevalence of violence against women suggests that they do not view them as full-fledged people worthy of respect.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 11:43 PM
0

Hm, ok. I will take your points under consideration. But your plans/behaviors in a relationship do not actually relate to the original post- that failure to view women as full-fledged people leads to unnecessary anger, combative relationships, and makes it even more unlikely that anyone will want to have sex with you. AND exacerbates issues relating to violence against women- amongst other things.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 11:16 PM
2

I am not qualified to speak on what neurotypicals do or do not do- but in my experience they are the most ableist of all. Stating that your inability to feel empathy for others limits your ability to fully participate in a discussion where empathy is required- that's just a basic truth, and not dehumanizing. You do not care about the feelings of men or women, so why would issues about who is getting laid and who is getting murdered concern you at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 11:04 PM
4

Because of all the posts stating that women are behaving incorrectly. That women have a "herd" mentality; that women who say they don't want children are lying / don't know what they want; that women are fucking 20 different guys every week, and won't fuck meeee; that women live life on easy mode; that women need to be submissive; that they are "used up," that they are going to be oh so sad alone with their cats; that women who get breast reductions are committing crimes against nature; that wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:54 PM
6

I have seen no real evidence to suggest that "most women don't treat men like humans." Can you provide examples of dehumanizing behavior perpetrated by women on men on any sort of a scale? How we treat people says everything about ourselves and what we value, and very little- if anything- about the other person. Women are people with interests, ideas, passions, and complex interior lives.Assuming that is the case does not require you to do more work; it may require you to question your assumptio…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:50 PM
3

I mean, your proclaimed diagnosis marks you as someone who views the thoughts and feelings of anyone else as being irrelevant, so you don't really belong in any sort of a debate. It's not even really appropriate for you- since you are incapable of having any sort of good-faith argument with someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:37 PM
6

I am trying to push up against your implication that women deserve to be harmed because they choose "the wrong men." Good men and dangerous men look identical on almost all outward measures. Dangerous men work many of the same jobs, read the same books, attend the same churches, enroll in the same colleges, dress the same, and wear the same shoes as good men who would never considering harming ANYONE. The idea that the fault lives with the abused rather than the abuser is the exact mentality tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:34 PM
4

I would agree that such things seem to be rare-- but so many commets on reddit, twitter; under news stories about what is termed an "honor killing" - all of the posts about women being used cars, pre-worn shoes; being used up; being worthless after age 23, the importance of finding a lot of women to sleep with, and then only tolerating the company of a virgin; the idea that women should not vote; that they should not be in the workplace; that women cannot tolerate actual hard work... I mean the …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:30 PM
2

Spending your life being LESS mad is a waste? Leaving yourself open to opportunities for joy and meaning is a waste?? It goes without saying (or should) if your partner is not meeting your needs, you should terminate that partnership. That is not what this post is about. This is not about how to be in a romantic relationship; it is not about what kind of partner you should be (loving and thoughtful is about all I would firmly state, but how that looks will differ). This is exclusively on implict…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:26 PM
9

I mean, are you wanting me to pull up all the data on men who stalk women who won't date them-- and how that stalking evolves to increased aggression? And, is your point that men do a superb job of hiding their violent tendencies until they've properly isolated you and managed to get you legally entangled with them-- is that supposed to be a point in favor of the male gender, or???
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:23 PM
2

What I took from the other person's response was "dudes don't just care about getting fucked" or "that's not the only thing dudes care about re: women" - and I was trying to illustrate there was evidence to the contrary.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:20 PM
3

Not exactly clear on what you mean, so I will say what I think you are saying before I respond (so if I misunderstood you, you can provide clarification). If you are saying that dudes in this subreddit caring only about getting fucked is not mutually exclusive with 99.9% of men NOT viewing women only in terms of their ability to be fucked- OK... But this is why I posted it in this sub rather than yelling on a street corner. If you are saying viewing a woman as a person and also as someone who sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:18 PM
5

OK, but that is not what this post is about. The impetus is all of these dudes who get on her to sound off on the things they believe women are doing wrong-- but that actual purpose of the post is to communicate that they cannot get laid, and they believe that means women, writ large, are terrible. And, if that's all it was, that's fine, but that's not all there is. We see all of these things about boys and men being radicalized online, and there's no end of stories about men harming, raping, an…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:14 PM
10

You say this, but I've already fielded a couple of posts that suggest otherwise. Where I indicated that treating women as if they are full humans with the intellectual capacity and agency associated with being a full human would not necessarily get them laid, I was told by two dudes that my request was worthless to their lives. The premise is not limited to "women should have sex with me" but encompasses all presuppositions about any notion of a predefined "purpose" - be it motherhood, being mar…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:11 PM
6

Discontinuing your feelings of impotent frustration about your inability to control other people is a waste to you? The suggestion is to approach people with an open mind. When you are in a relationship, you can discuss what roles you each want to fulfill in that relationship. Divvy up chores, responsiblities, identify preferences- I am not making an argument against this. Simply offering a plea to view women as fully fledged human beings with agency.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:07 PM
8

Advice to approach women with the same degree of flexibility that you do men? Do you mean my post is bait? Because assuming women are people is obvious, or because the men in question are incapable of doing so?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:04 PM
-2

OK, but that is kind of the thing, right? If I view all people of a specific gender as having the purpose of fucking me, then your failure to do so makes me mad. If you discard that assumption, you will A) be less mad in general-- which has a whole host of health benefits, and B) more likely to actually be fucked.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:03 PM
4

Hmmm, that is an interesting thought. The idea of disliking certain trends that are associated with one sex over the other, but not assuming that your friends or love-interests fall into that category? I suppose if it doesn't cause you to go on rampages bashing an entire gender or commit offenses against that gender, or turn a blind eye when others actively try to harm that gender, and don't participate in behavior that causes people within that gender harm... just maintaining the right to eye r…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 10:00 PM
5

That is a perfectly reasonable option.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 09:55 PM
3

"Women listen to a variety of opinions and viewpoints when analyzing a situation. Men say the first thing that pops into their head, and dig in their heels when challenged, indicating women have a HERD mentality." Though even that isn't true. It's likely just true about you. Most men have the capacity to be just as thoughtful as many women. Though they may be shamed for exercising it, for appearing to be "feminine." If women did such a good job of meeting societal expectations, likely we would n…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 06:53 PM
1

This happens to everybody. Given your claim as a "black pilled man" the dynamics you are likely to have with even close, platonic women-friends would preclude them sharing such a thing with you. That's assuming you have, or have had, close women friends, which I'm not sure would even be consistent with "black pill orthodoxy." Your awareness of this is not required for the reality to remain.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/25 10:30 PM
1

Full agreement- but there's no reason to gender the post. If someone has romantic feelings for a friend and those feelings are not reciprocated, and maintaining the friendship is deleterious to that person's mental health, they should feel no guilt about pulling back on thr friendship as a form of self care.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/25 08:33 PM
1

You posit, in your original post that if a dude seeks a romantic relationship with a woman he is friends with, and she declines, that the dude should terminate the friendship. You used your personal experiences and feelings to make recommendations to other dudes. Other dudes can do their own calculation for themselves, depending on their own specific situations and make a determination that makes the most sense to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/25 06:58 PM
1

Sure, but it's using the hurt to dictate how other dudes should feel and respond if they are in similar situations.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/25 06:14 PM
1

What if she is amusing, entertaining, provides support to you, and is a source of intellectual stimulation?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/25 09:31 PM
3

Congratulations on taking a bad-faith argument and making it your own. Maybe if you'd read the rest of the comment your response wouldn't be so...lackluster.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 05:54 AM
3

Are you assuming the women who say this are just the top 20% of women according to whatever arbitrary metrics I decide to reference? Being a woman automatically comes with additional challenges, in terms of being able to safely pursue our interests in society. However, what everyone forgets when engaging in either side of this argument is: Pain. Is NOT. Relative. Someone else having it easier or harder than you in any capacity does not have any tangible effect on your experience/struggles. Your …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 12:16 AM
1

EDIT: Noticing different interpretations of "first choice." I was taking it to mean that the woman he chose is the first runner up, who took over the crown because the winner was unable or unwilling to fulfill that role. Others are interpreting "first" in the linear time sense. Like she was his first love, you are his second. Others are rejecting the paradigm completely and saying (correctly) that there are billions on the planet- there's not likely to be just one person to make you happy, so "f…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 08:44 PM
-2

Women in real life are not pursuing this same "top 10% of men." In real life they pursue who they are interested in, but who I am interested in has such scant overlap with my peers, I've- in the past- wondered if I'm crazy or they are. Whatever "10%" they are chasing (as women do have to be more cautious for a variety of reasons- primarily pertaining to safety), the vast majority of men who wish to date likely can. Dating apps are a different story. Most of the dudes I've dated in real life woul…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 08:37 PM
2

Social media has illustrated to women that there are an abundance of shitty men out there, and this post clearly demonstrates that. Knowing we don't despise men the way they despise both women and themselves may make women feel morally superior. Luckily, many of us also have many wonderful men in our lives, which reminds us that these subpar men we come across on social media are a loud minority. We hope these mediocre and subpar men can come in contact with good men, and take a page out of thei…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 02:32 AM
1

Which is why it works so well to tell kids "grow up!" Or teens, "don't be so insecure!" And they are like "poof! I'm cured!" And that's why nobody has issues with attention span or impulse control, and we live in a literal utopia? I'm going to assume you are just fucking around. Adios!
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 03:09 AM
1

I don't think human development works like that lol
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 02:19 AM
1

Sure, but they were insecure. Who is going to be mad at them for feeling insecure when they were younger? I'm sure they consider the missed opportunities- who doesn't... but I know they are relieved to know women like them, and girls liked them when they were younger. Sometimes you gotta grow up a bit to overcome those insecurities, so you can live the life you want.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 08:44 PM
3

Women are generally at significantly greater risk if things go poorly, so tend to be more alert for red flags (or "icks"). Women are, on average, smaller, so may be more vulnerable to violence. That aside, a consequence of sex- the potential for pregnancy- is significantly risky, even under ideal circumstances. This is relevant given sex is a significant component of most romantic adult relationships (which I below is the topic at hand). Plus, Women are taught- nearly from birth- to be wary of m…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 04:31 AM
0

Maybe the point is- you can't bitch or bully your way into making people like you. Self-improvement may or may not work in terms of making you more attractive to others, but worst-case scenario- when done correctly- you will have positive outcomes (re: health and resources) to show for your efforts. What is the alternative? If people don't like you, do nothing different? Many would agree that's terrible advice. Maybe the point at which it's unhelpful is- if the person was capable of self-improvi…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/24 11:57 AM
–

Nobody- sane, or in good faith- is claiming all men are dangerous. The point is that a not-small number of men can be / have been / are dangerous, and there is no way to discern those who are dangerous from those who aren't. Therefore we, as women must assume any man may be dangerous, as a means of keeping ourselves safe. It is precautionary. As someone who has been raped by someone who I'd been good friends with for at least 8 months, and sexually assaulted by a different friend I'd had for mor…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 11:51 PM
1

Wow. Women have an in-group bias? See- this is my point. Not a good faith debate- everyone has an in-group bias. Back to the point- while your point itself is not incorrect, it has inaccurate implications, and is not helpful. Women like to shop? Not necessarily. The implication that men don't like to? Not necessarily. Lacking in accuracy, nuance and not helpful. And your "poor black neighborhood " deal, as if poor white neighborhoods are safer. Give me a break bro.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/24 11:43 PM
2

Observed (or, let's be honest- things you pay attention to because they affect you, or you perceive they do) trends that lead to generalizing large groups of people are generally inaccurate, and at a MINIMUM lack nuance. People are not simply passive observers that have some objective take on what they see and witness. People notice specific things, ascribe intentionality to behaviors that may or may not be accurate, and use these "observations" to make statements (usually negative) about a larg…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/24 10:25 PM
1

Generalizations are USUALLY untrue. Especially the ones that pop up on this sub. This, I believe, is the OP's point...
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/24 10:11 PM
4

The problem with universal statements on a debate platform is that such statements don't lend themselves to genuine debate. You cannot - in good faith - have a meaningful debate on a statement like "men are pigs." If the forum is for debate- to get a clearer idea of where people are coming from, universal statements should be minimized.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/24 10:07 PM
1

Ok, but I think the vast majority of humans know women are equally capable of being jag-offs. But I'm sorry about your recent revelation.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 09:48 PM
1

I guess I don't understand what you are looking to get out of this. Like- OK, painting women with too broad a brush as innately empathetic is problematic- but you are just going in the opposite direction. Your post just stating that women are NOT empathetic, and then giving an example of people being assholes on the internet... and while I am sure that is not the original intention of the internet, it is the most prevalent outcome. The way to combat the over-statement of a positive attribute is …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 08:56 PM
1

Fair enough on the broken heart stuff-- but it is worth noting that when relationships end one person getting their heart broken doesn't mean the other person did not also get theirs broken. Relationships can end for a lot of reasons-- and just because you aren't a good fit with someone doesn't mean you don't want to be. Anyway- painting with a broad brush is easy, which is why people do it. "Women are empathetic!" - easy, sometimes true, not always. "Women are NOT empathetic" - easy, can be tru…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 08:29 PM
3

Cool; so people stop claiming women are empathetic; now what? I am not agreeing with your premise, but the fact is people say things that are not true all the time. Those untruths/lies tend to only get people riled up if they feel like that lie is somehow meaningfully impactful to their life. Of the myriad of lies you encounter, what is it about this "lie" you find so personally offensive? What I will agree with is- the trope that all women are natural caregivers is perhaps pervasive, and is in …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 08:12 PM
1

Probably not; likely just the "Revenge of the Nerds" trope. I hang out with a lot of dudes who became more successful with dating in their thirties, and are thrilled. They often realize that the insecurities they had as younger men were in their head, and that women have been- more or less- interested in them this entire time, but their self-esteem issues interfered with them recognizing it for what it was.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 07:59 PM
1

First- I don't believe you are making this argument in good faith. Second- If you are looking to internet responses to get A) a representative sample of all women, or B) authentic/genuine respones from people, just generally, I have some bad news for you. People who comment on these types of posts (myself included) are not likely to be representative of their whole gender. Also- the way someone responds on the internet to some unknown random person and how they might respond to a person they are…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 07:50 PM
–

The wall isn't real. I'm 40 and have never received so much interest from GOOD men as I have since splitting from my spouse (who is wonderful as well- we just aren't good for each other). The type of men who are worth being with (who see women as humans, potential partners, etc.), generally like similar-aged women. Women they can relate to, who are in a similar stage of life. If a man trades you in for a newer model (eye rolling so hard 🙄) he's not worth keeping. The "trading you in" indicates y…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 12:26 AM
2

I really appreciate this comment on multiple levels. It does a lot to provide a frame for how a lot of men think, that I'd not previously understood... it kind of brings a lot of men into focus, and has me reframing some of my previous romantic relationships. Though now I'm re-evaluating my reactions and responses...which is causing me anxiety...but I'm a big believer in "when you know better you do better." Your conceptualization of partners bonding over time, sharing intimate moments, experien…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 03:45 PM
2

I feel you... but there's an argument to be made that men being "happy enough" is not enough for many women. Having a lukewarm relationship can lead to people not feeling loved or supported in the relationship, which can lead to resentment, which can lead to want to get out. It would be interesting to see where the data fall, but I would suspect that many women would just as soon not be with someone whose feelings toward them feel suspiciously like settling. My parents' relationship is one where…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 08:08 PM
3

The fact that many men have no standards makes dating more difficult. Not only do I have to figure out if you are good for me- I have to discern if I'm good for you. If I'm not, I'll make you miserable, long-term, which is shitty. Plus, there's a good chance you'll meet someone later on who checks boxes you didn't know you should have, and what's to stop you from getting with her if she's interested?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 12:08 PM
–

No time like the present to get started. 👋
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 07:52 PM
–

I'm not talking about dating. I meant in life. Find other ways to be a contributing member of society. Contribute in a positive way.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 11:01 AM
16

Reading through your post and comments made to others... you are a piece of shit. Do not pass on your genetic material. You do not contribute in a positive way to society or civilization. You don't even give a shit about civilization writ large- you just want women to want to fuck you. We don't and we won't. There are so many amazing men out there. Short, tall, slender, heavy- everything in between. You are a dude whose life did not work out the way he expected. Join the fucking club. Adapt. Fig…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 12:47 AM
12

She's bragging on her dude, not herself. Her dude may still be cool af. Whatever red flags you perceive her having are irrelevant if her point is she knows a cool ass dude. In fact, your post seems to have no purpose. "Women who love the men in their life are red flags." Weird argument to make in my opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 03:01 AM
3

Let me know when you want your testicles back. They are in my purse. 👍
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 02:30 AM
3

Lol not a chance. Do I have pictures of this (gentleman performing oral sex) that I later masturbate to? Yes. EDIT: do I also refer to this gentleman's face as "the best seat in the house?" GD right I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/24 02:24 AM
–

It is easier for women to find companionship. However, it is also much riskier- which is one reason why women are more selective. I don't know if we want to break down the risks, but they can be to physical safety- but don't have to be. Plus we want to be with a man who wants specifically to be with us for who we are - not because we are the first person not to rebuff their advances in the "numbers game" they are playing. Another reason for being more selective. Having options can be a privilege…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/24 08:34 PM
0

My original post noted men are less agreeable than women... so I guess you are just proving my point. I guess YOU cannot read... or understand basic human psychology. So embarrassing for you. Sorry also for my numerous comments, but I'm headed to bed, so won't comments after tonight. Tomorrow I will remember that I don't give a fuck what you think. 😇 But, since I'll be going to my job early tomorrow- a place where my contributions to the lives of others (making their lives better!) are easily de…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 02:30 AM
2

Oh https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3149680/ Another poster, who disagreed shared this. It is more appropriate for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 02:21 AM
0

All your source does is prove the irrelevance of the original post.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 02:20 AM
1

<image> Caring what people think =/= agreeableness
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 02:20 AM
1

Excellent * That means the original post is irrelevant. Women are already more agreeable than men, therefore men should stop bitching. Go work on making men more agreeable. Because the rest of us don't fucking care. Because let's get fucking real- this post isn't actually about agreeableness (and, as previously stated, if it is, the post is moot, as your source proves). It is about women being amenable to whatever whim OP has.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 02:18 AM
3

Hot take. But..... false.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 02:13 AM
0

Awesome. Cite your source.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 02:05 AM
1

Sorry. I just feel like it's helpful to be succinct. Anyone who has these types of opinions on what women "are" or "should be" get the understandable response of "wah wah." Ya'all are useless and someone ought to tell you. I am well-situated due to having a plethora (that means a lot) of amazing men and women friends, acquaintances, associates, etc., who provide examples of how people can be. It highlights how so many (like you!) fall short.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 01:50 AM
3

The same source you cited. 😇
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 01:31 AM
-3

Wah wah. False. Your comment proving you (surprise, surprise) know nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 01:31 AM
0

Men are less agreeable than women. Let's start addressing that behavior first. Also- as a woman, we are who we are. We don't give a fuck if you like it. We will act as a "team player" when we find a team (or partnership) we want to be a part of. Meanwhile, you should be more agreeable. Us women would be more interested in you if you were. 👍
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/24 11:27 PM
1

Oh honey, not every woman does this- and not every man abstains. Many of us women are too lazy to do much beyond hygiene and a stretchy bralette (required so that nobody knows that I- a middle aged woman- has nipples). And if you spend any time with a partner, you can observe them in all states of existence- with or without makeup, all states of dress and undress - in the case of romantic relationships. I wear a cpap when I sleep. Something an overnight guest would witness, but not something I w…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/24 04:49 PM
2

So, basically embracing misandry by finding women without options, so you become the de facto best option? Keep talking about it- still nobody cares. I know, I know- my comment proves I care. However it's more of a "stop talking about going and just go!" Kind of thing. Because while we don't care, I for one am tired of hearing about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/24 08:05 PM
3

I'm sorry- this must be satire, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/24 01:15 PM
2

There is a widespread belief that people should only have sex with people they want to have sex with. While not having someone to hump is legitimately frustrating, trying to blame (and/or hate on) an entire gender for this is: 1) not going to get you laid, and 2) not helpful to gender-relations in general. Why can't we do something constructive about people's feelings of being unloved, unwanted, and otherwise unimportant? And I'm not talking about changing who you are or trying to manipulate peo…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 07:03 PM
1

There is honestly no need to have kids, enter a long term relationship or become married anymore as a man correction- "as a person." There's no need for any human to do this.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/24 08:48 PM
13

Nobody needs a reason to reject another's advances or to be disinterested in a relationship. That puts entitlement on the side of men- assuming women by default should desire their company/advances. Being shocked when it's not the case indicates entitlement. You might be handsome by many objective metrics, wealthy, thoughtful, interesting, and kind. That does not obligate me to want your companionship. Think through your claim on this. Your assessment relegates women to objects, when actually we…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 08:02 PM
4

Actually I would posit the opposite- It CAN be arousing to allow yourself to be vulnerable in a relationship, but this type of vulnerability can only be found with a partner who you trust with your life. Not a "bad boy" and not a "nice guy™️" -but a GOOD, genuine, earnest man (since we are focusing on straight women). The way in which women are vulnerable to bad dudes as mentioned in the original post isn't arousing- it's scary.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/24 11:35 AM
17

This is stupid af.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/24 01:14 AM
1

Women are VIEWED as difficult by men who would seek to control them. It is a matter of perspective. We can say people are difficult who do not behave the way we want them to/the way we are attempting to make them behave. If you have a "difficult child" - they are one who likely does not follow the rules; resists discipline etc. Women are absolutely not MORE difficult than men. People are difficult, generally, I could safely argue-- saying women are difficult indicates that they are more difficul…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 06:20 PM
1

Fyi ransom=random <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 02:31 AM
1

I didn't fucking read the book. Why the fuck would you think me copying an image of the synopsis of a book you recommended 5 minutes ago would suggest that I had in fact read it? Again- I'd had mere minutes to have done so. AND why are you STILL asking me for my take on this book I've obviously not read. Not talking out of my ass- nobody reviewing our correspondence would think I'd read more than the synopsis I screenshotted this synopsis, highlighting the points that applied to my previous stat…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 12:50 AM
1

I DIDN'T read the book, just a synopsis, therefore i do not know how she characterizes- what seems to be a specific subset of interactions - between women. I doubt you read this book, and you should admit it. I'm not sure your point about her blaming men, or why the genre would dictate the necessity. Women can view other women as sexual rivals. Women can be cruel to other women as men can be. Women are fully formed people with layers, not dissimilar to men. But again, these are tropes we are bra…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 12:21 AM
1

Makes me wonder if YOU read it, or just felt the book's title suited your purpose. 😂
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 08:09 PM
1

Seems similar to points I made... <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 08:08 PM
2

OOOOoooohhhhhhh ok. The women in my life treat me and other women (men too, incidentally) extremely well. Women I've come across who don't treat women well also don't treat men well. Diagnosis? They are dicks. There are many people who don't treat people in their lives well- irrespective of gender. These folks are dicks. Those aforementioned "proverbs" about women being difficult have exclusively to do with dudes being unhappy with how their every whim us not being catered to by a woman. Nothing…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 03:59 PM
5

Oh- and men treating other men that they are worth LESS than women- or that their lives are worth less - the conscription, wars, and subjugation is another reason men are so fucking resentful of women. So, your efforts (and successes) in controlling men has seen a backlash of men resenting WOMEN. Despite the fact- as you correctly noted- their lives being treated as expendable is a tactic of control that other MEN are exerting on them.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/24 08:52 PM
6

Then stop fucking trying.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/24 08:34 PM
10

"Women have always been antagonistic to men's CEASELESS efforts to control and define them (defining them and their "role" only in terms of how they must relate and service men)." = women are difficult. "Women have always insisted on being people in their own right rather than simply behaving how me as a man would prefer." = Women are difficult. "Despite our efforts to control Women through law and religion, Women insist on asserting their personhood which they claim to be self-evident." = Women…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/24 06:42 PM
–

Maybe not all of us see these things as "issues." Birth rate is below replacement: good- there are too many fricken people on the planet and this is unsustainable. The real issue is how to keep the economy working with an aging population. For those in the U.S. where basically 10 people hold the majority of the nation's wealth, we are in need of significant changes with how resources are distributed anyway- popping out more babies is not a long-term fix. Young Men being single/not getting marrie…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 02:05 PM
0

I think you are correct- he thought they would get to know him, date him (then, presumably, drop the panties). Something he didn't realize until he met his wife- these gals were not a good fit for him. They were nice, cute, funny, smart- but in terms of temperament, values, interests, goals, etc., they weren't a good fit. Brother didn't realize until later that attraction (mutual or not) is not a sufficient foundation- by itself- for a healthy long-term relationship. I've seen a fair number of m…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/24 01:24 PM
4

Honestly I couldn't say for sure, but my guess is all the TV shows we grew up with- the male who is something of a misfit, hopelessly pursuing a female (maybe friend, maybe not). She may or may not know he's alive- but his good deeds, persistence, loyalty get him the object of his affection. Growing up as a girl, I always noticed the girl/woman being pursued was always classically beautiful; generally not a misfit... as a rule these gals were maybe 2-dimensional (perhaps to show girls/women as s…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/24 12:31 AM
-1

My brother reminisced that when he was in high school he thought of the girls in his class like vending machines, and if you put in enough "nice guy coins" the panties would drop- that this is what they were owed. Thankfully he quickly grew out of this post high school, found a wonderful wife. They are both good partners to each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/24 10:07 PM
1

Ummm that taxes exist, and basic plans on paying them + refund. To spend fewer dollars than I have coming in. I can survive, but don't feel like a real adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/24 02:32 AM
1

I have terrible mommy issues- and strong relationships with my father and brother. This has caused difficulty for me in forming strong, trusting relationships with girls (growing up) and with women. Of course being in any monogamous relationship and primarily having dude friends can present some concerns for any partner (given I am a heterosexual woman). It would be good for me to form and maintain strong relationships with women- but despite knowing the cause of my difficulties, I'm not able to…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/24 10:34 PM
–

Shhhhh...
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 11:56 PM
–

Can you expand on that?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 12:13 AM
–

Maybe this shows that regardless of how attractive you are, how much money you have, how much prestige/status you have, if you are lame / choose lame partners you are still going to have trouble with your romantic relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/24 11:30 PM
0

The alphabet people? Wtf are you talking about. I'd heard the restatement of this joke, said in earnest, and I just thought there's no way folks really think this is true, or that it's something to strive for. Which seems to be mostly the case. Hallelujah.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/24 10:42 PM
2

I absolutely agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 12:11 PM
5

<image> I guess it was a Chris Rock quote that took off?i
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 04:05 AM
2

Ok- thanks to everyone for weighing in. Most of you have given me a lot of good things to consider. I'm headed to bed, won't be checking in til tomorrow evening. I appreciate you all for taking the time to respond!!!!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:58 AM
2

Ohhhhhh, thanks for clearing that up.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:56 AM
1

If they can find him. Also- paying some costs (if he has a job, if, if, if) for the kid would not make up lost income. Pregnancy, birth, child-rearing is hella expensive. Child support (for an unwanted/unplanned pregnancy) doesn't even come close.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:54 AM
4

I agree that men are treated as disposable (see other comments) - but the phenomenon is the same in reverse. "I have a daughter, joking about rape is no longer hilarious." I'm with you on benevolent sexism and those outcomes (war, maternal rights, domestic violence perpetrated against men). And from a specific perspective I can see how this contrast can leave men feeling like women have a very profound privilege- and in that one particular sense I will not disagree. But that's not the full story…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:52 AM
2

Oohhhhhh ok. I don't give a fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:43 AM
2

Perhaps- but people forget how DANGEROUS it is to be pregnant- and the costs (both in terms of literal costs and loss of income) associated with pregnancy and birth.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:43 AM
5

I'm saying their degrees are IN higher education. Meaning they STUDIED education. Education- a field dominated by women, therefore not "alpha males." My point is the idea that women are loved unconditionally is silly- and the idea that men are ignored unless they meet some arbitrary height/income threshold is ludicrous. I have a couple graduate degrees. My job requires graduate-level education, therefore the folks o encounter are similar to myself. That's pretty typical. But they are not more or…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:41 AM
4

I'm sorry it's not worth your time to read a peer-reviewed journal article abstract on the topic. Such a thing wouldn't move the needle regardless (research shows facts do not change people's opinions, regardless of how well researched and supported they are). If you desire to remain wilfully ignorant, who am I to interfere?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:35 AM
4

Still- being attracted to someone does not equal love. I do think about the "attraction gap." I have to think about it maybe as a risk assessment. The risks of hooking up with a man- as a woman- can be much riskier (whether it is or not can be debated, but I'm prone to think it is). Men are, on average, bigger- and nearly always- stronger than us. And, in cases of sex (protected, unprotected, otherwise) the risks are greater (again- I believe this is true- but we are taught/conditioned to believ…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:32 AM
3

Ok, cool. Provide your citation to show that women don't achieve the highest stages of moral development. Women are not inferior to men intellectually or morally. If you opt to refute this statement, do so exclusively with peer reviewed articles please. Also Carol GILLIGAN was a scholar. Being a feminist does not negate that.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:24 AM
2

I do not believe that men writ large hate women. But I also know that society- including men- so not unconditionally love women. Where did you get the idea that I think dudes hate women??? The same comment you noted applies as much to you and your thoughts, beliefs, and biases as anybody else...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:19 AM
2

I'm not sure that's necessarily true. But I just want to do away with this idea that women are universally unconditionally loved or revered. Attractive women-in particular- are given a LOT of leeway, but this is not extended to other women. Similar to how attractive men are given deference by women (presumably) and other men.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:16 AM
8

Perhaps, but I think it's still specific women- just like it's specific men. I guess it may be important to state what makes someone a "winner" will differ from woman to woman. The idea "men need to earn attention" meaning women don't? I don't see that play out in real life. I see women at men's sporting events, not the opposite (generally). I've had many men expect I will be content watching them participate in their hobby (video games, band practice, athletics practice) but have not seen the o…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:13 AM
3

Your whole comment. I'm not religious, but know a fair amount about religion. I have no clue what you are trying to communicate. I feel like you started your comment as though we'd been in the midst of a conversation. Context, please.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:05 AM
6

I don't disagree- but if you opt out or are incapable of fulfilling what is viewed as your "innate ability" you do have societal repercussion. This is related to the overturning of Roe V. Wade/the Dobbs Decision- the idea that a woman would value her own life over that of a POTENTIAL human makes so many people clutch their pearls. This may be a specific limit of this "unconditional love."
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 03:03 AM
4

Agreed
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:59 AM
7

Nah. I say this as a woman who attends weekly DnD meetings with dudes who do not identify as "alpha males." I've never been attracted to an "alpha male." My husband is a psychologist, works with kiddos. Is soft spoken, cried during "The Vow." My best dude friends work in Higher education- backgrounds in mental health, computer science/programming, counseling, history, sociology. Their average height? Maybe 5'8". Relationship status? Married, LTR (10+ years), divorced, remarried- runs the gamut. …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:59 AM
2

If it's a fact I'm going to need to see those sources brotato-chip.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:51 AM
5

Loads of childhood trauma has provided a basis for that. Are you loved unconditionally? Whether yes or no- how do you know that?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:50 AM
3

I'm sorry, what??
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:48 AM
2

Actually, there is. https://www.jstor.org/stable/41675382
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:47 AM
8

I see your point and think there's definitely truth to it. As a woman who hasn't/cannot have children, I guess the default view of women as valuable falls away. I do feel like this "value" is inextricably linked to the idea of women as incubators and birth-givers.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:43 AM
12

Agreed on all fronts. Men are treated as disposable and it's fucking crazy. I was grown before I learned about the damn selective service. I've got an older brother. Hot tip- his life is not worth less than mine, and the idea it's treated as such drives me fucking nuts. Women and children in the lifeboats? JFC. We live in a boring dystopia. I've thought about how reproduction plays into things- being an "incubator" for new life absolutely complicates things, like drafted military service. But du…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:41 AM
7

Ok, great. Khlberg famously thought women could not advance to the final stage of morality. Great for a theoritician, not a researcher. Stating women are full grown adults with the faculties that come with it is not an assertion that should require a host of citations. But sure, why not- https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/are_women_more_ethical_than_men#:~:text=Analyzing%20data%20from%2033%20independent,more%20strongly%20than%20did%20men. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/whe…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:33 AM
6

That's not true. I'm not loved unconditionally- never have been. My argument- first, who is providing this love? Is an effort to parse out specific arguments. Is it you? Do YOU love women unconditionally? I'm a woman. Do you love me unconditionally???
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:24 AM
4

I think it's good that you feel that way. I feel the same way about dudes.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:21 AM
1

I think that is very fair. I guess we need to think about how things feel versus how things are. But I do 100% agree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:21 AM
7

Good point.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:19 AM
5

But that's not love.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:19 AM
–

Anecdotal impressions- but also specific research articles- National Institutes of Health (.gov) www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov Stereotypes of Black American Women Related to Sexuality and Motherhood
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:18 AM
4

So.... just your opinion then??? Just making sure there wasn't anything of substance behind your statement. 👍
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:15 AM
9

Ok- but being attracted to any woman does not equal live. Plus men are not actually attracted to ANY woman. Otherwise hetero women wouldn't have similar sad stories.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 02:14 AM
10

As evidenced by????
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 01:36 AM
6

True that. My dad maybe loves me unconditionally, but my mom doesn't even tolerate me unconditionally. Maybe that's what makes me roll my eyes so hard. The highly conditional/absent love of a parental figure.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 01:35 AM
10

Good call. I think you are 💯 right.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 01:33 AM
–

That is true- at least for white women. Black women are not- it seems- afforded the same level of vulnerability as white women.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 01:29 AM
5

I think that is a fair statement- BUT it goes back to benevolent sexism/the infantalization of women. Being seen as pathetic, incapable, "damsel in distress" is patronizing. Refusing to acknowledge dudes who need help is a huge problem (which feminism, equality can address). When women hit dudes (looking at you, "The Notebook"), that is un-fucking-acceptable. So, again, I say- it's not ok, not helpful, not something to strive for, and not even a net-benwfit to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 01:28 AM
8

Ok, so- — Briffault's law asserts that females determine whether or not a relationship takes place based on how much they benefit This essentially means women are socially conditioned to find a good partner. That added with the current societal conditions that women can care for themselves (at least financially) means women may hold out for a man that improves their life. If no such man is available, the woman will continue to fly solo. This has nothing to do with love- unconditional or otherwis…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 01:22 AM
-2

Fair. And I guess it depends on what we count as "love."
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 01:15 AM
3

This is a lame take.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 01:04 AM
–

OOOOHhHhhhhh! Sorry dude. Her interest was 3 out of 100. Not enough to build a relationship on. Sorry.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/24 02:12 AM
–

Wtf does your "pick a card, any card" shtick have to do with the fact that the gal you were chatting up wasn't interested, and was only being friendly because A) she's just a friendly person or B) as a protective instinct, since many men become verbally aggressive (or more) when rejected. No woman would let her friends drag her away if she is REALLY interested. Sorry.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/24 01:47 AM
–

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/24 01:12 AM
–

Our friends don't have final say over who we talk to. If we are interested we brush our friends off. If we don't brush our friends off, we aren't feeling you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/24 01:08 AM
–

Sorry bro- if homegirl was interested she'd have let her friend know. If we see our friend in an awkward situation, we intervene. If we misread the situation, the friend would say "ok, hold on just a minute" and she would dibs your digits. If she let her friend lead her away, she just wasn't that into you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/24 01:06 AM
1

This opinion is based on what, exactly?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 11:53 PM
2

Do they lose attraction or does the novelty/infatuation wear off? This is a necessary process, or nobody would ever get anything done. We'd all be too busy humping like bunnies and the economy would collapse. 😋
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 12:46 PM
3

Bullshit. But have fun self-sabotaging.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 01:43 AM
2

If that was the case, she wouldn't be doing anything with you anyway. Also- I'm not sure how common this is- but there are positions you can do with an average sized penis that you can not do with a larger position because it hurts. Anyway, your assessment is off. But, if you want to poison potentially good relationships because of insecurities, that's your business.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 12:10 AM
2

What are you basing this on? This sounds like the situation you want- a person who endures any manner of humiliations to make you "happy." This definitely does not describe any relationship I've ever had- friendship, romantic, or otherwise. Nobody has ever "given" me money (other than caregivers when I was a child). The scenario you are describing- who would even put up with that? No man or woman I know of. I don't know what frame of reference you are working from, but it's warped, and sure af d…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/24 12:17 PM
2

What? That did not even make sense? Can you articulate this more clearly please?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/24 12:10 PM
8

My husband and I are working toward him being a house husband where I'm the bread winner. He will be at home. Already it is me who puts in the extra hours, working toward- yet another- promotion, as that is our shared goal. Guess what- I still don't think I'm somehow justified in having him engage in sex acts he's not into. Your argument is nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/24 03:17 AM
3

Nope, don't care.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/24 03:11 AM
6

Yeah, people starving is not equivalent to knowingly making your partner uncomfortable for your own jollies, so I will stop you there. Didn't state an unwillingness to compromise or inconvenience myself- and what goes for me goes for him. So you could as easily say - "your partner wants you to feel safe, so long as he doesn't compromise anything- but I notice you didn't say that. Because really, what it's about is you want a woman you are with to be willing to be uncomfortable for you. It's impo…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/24 03:06 AM
6

As noted in my comment- I prioritize my husband's comfort as he prioritizes mine. 2-way street. I did want you to extrapolate my statement of me and my husband beyond the 2 of us. One partner shouldn't need to become uncomfortable for the pleasure of the other, full stop- genders are irrelevant. Side note- sorry about my technical/grammatical errors. I want my partner to feel safe, secure, confident, and comfortable in our relationship. If a previous partner made him jump through hoops (she did)…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/24 12:14 AM
2

Agreed! 😍
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/24 11:36 PM
7

Or she trusts you to prioritize her comfort- knows you won't force her to make "sacrifices" to prover her live, because she shows you/tells you she loves you, and does so in a way that is not a sacrifice. Can you give me an example of what's in your mind with this response? Are you thinking of a sex thing, housework, money, grand gesture, or other thing? Depending on what you are primarily referring to, my reaction to your response may be wildly different. Thinking of my husband- he would never …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/24 11:35 PM
11

I think it depends on why... If you are less fearful of me having a negative emotional reaction because of something you did not do (e.g. get me a gift for a holiday) and it's caused you to be less vigilant, maybe I'm happy to be in a relationship that is less volatile/ more secure...that you trust me not to read something negative into it. The majority of the time, if someone is resistant to do something they've done in the past, the reasoning is logical and not malicious. Maybe I don't want to…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/24 11:14 PM
0

Preach!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/23 12:42 PM
5

Yeah, this is dumb. I don't believe any part of this ever happened. You are unlikely able to get anyone to sleep with you. You definitely aren't capable of a real human relationship/partnership. Lame.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/23 01:56 AM
–

EXACTLY! I only opened the comments because I was going to make this point. I remember being 16, on a youth group trip with my church, out at a restaurant and this dude was there with his children (about 6-8 years old) and this guy hitting on me blatantly enough that my friend I was walking next to says "and another middle aged man hits on [my name]" - loud enough for this guy to hear. This- as you can guess- was not an uncommon occurrence- so much so that my boy peer noticed and commented on it…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/23 12:03 AM
1

Yeah, my point is- people generally don't think like that. People who do...it feels like a red flag. I think it's extraordinarily reductive, lacking nuance about social interactions. Indicating that a large group of people...roughly half the population "make critical errors in partner choosing" honestly, it makes you sound a bit like a crazy person. There are a lot of factors that go into choosing (or declining to choose) a partner for both men and women. Some partnerships work out, some don't- …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 06:50 PM
1

Yeah, my point is- people generally don't think like that. People who do...it feels like a red flag. I think it's extraordinarily reductive, lacking nuance about social interactions. Indicating that a large group of people...roughly half the population "make critical errors in partner choosing" honestly, it makes you sound a bit like a crazy person. There are a lot of factors that go into choosing (or declining to choose) a partner for both men and women. Some partnerships work out, some don't- …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 06:50 PM
1

That's not a system. That's just saying many folks would like a companion. A system implies a coordinated effort of the participants of the system, to a specific outcome. For example: if at our monthly woman meetings we came up with a specific rating scale for dudes based on a myriad of factors. Height, weight, muscle mass, genetic predispositions to hair loss, foot size, dick size, political leanings, hair color, family wealth, parents marital status, job prestige, gross income- called it a def…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 05:07 PM
1

"System" implies coordinated efforts to achieve some specific end... and there isn't anything like that in play.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 04:09 PM
2

Meh, I'm happy. Wonderful man, wonderful friends, wonderful job. Same with the women I know and have known. It's only men I see making these desperate pleas into the void. If you really knew how things worked, you would know it's not a "system." This planet is going to shake us off like a bad case of fleas before a fair number of dudes realize: women are just like you- lost, confused, hurting, trying to make sense out of existence that seems to have no inherent purpose, trying to find or create …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 02:33 AM
4

It's cool, dude. You don't get it, and that's a bummer. You want people to be fundamentally different, and it's not going to happen. I hope you find someone who truly understands you...then you will understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 02:14 AM
5

Your entire premise is bullshit. If women are lying to you, find better women (similar nonsense to women choosing better/non-abusive guys when they are victims of domestic violence- not my sarcasm). Women are not en masse lying to men. We are individuals. There is no conspiracy against men. This is not a thing. Your point 2 gets to my initial post.(see how I knew where you were going with your post. I like to cut thru the nonsense and bullshit.) We like who we like. We do not have some ranking s…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 01:35 AM
3

I read it, which is not to say it made any practical sense.... What exactly is your suggested remedy?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 01:06 AM
2

We like who we like. Nobody should date someone they aren't into, regardless of the reason. All claims to the contrary are idiotic, and I cannot figure wtf people on this sub spend do much time attempting to do so. Guess what? Person A dates Person B despite not being into them (as you are essentially suggesting) - what happens when Person A finds someone they ARE interested in (who is also interested in them)? Affair? Divorce? All of the above? How is Person B going to feel when Person A resent…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/23 12:40 AM
–

Dude- you not fucking anyone (because, let's get real, you suck) is not equivalent to living in a country that doesn't take care of its citizens and allows a large population of homeless to exist - without options. Dudes like you, walking away- nobody cares. Go! Go faster, actually. As indicated previously-most dudes are great. You are in the minority. Let the trash take itself out. If anyone gave a shit you wouldn't have to post it here on reddit. "Lazy rape fantasy dystopia" -wtf are you on ab…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/23 03:41 AM
–

Neither. I have an alarm system + cameras. I can check that shit out myself from the safety of my bed. You think I'm gonna send my beloved husband into danger, jfc, get real.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/23 03:21 AM
–

What response, exactly do you expect women to make? We aren't going to fuck dudes we are not into. Despite what you (and a small-but vocal group of dudes on this sub) seem to think, the number of genuinely GOOD dudes on this planet is rather high. Dudes who think and act like you ignoring women? Let me be the first to say "oh no, boo-hoo, please stop, no..." Let them eat cake? I mean, we are not withholding resources to ourselves that would alleviate starvation for the masses. We get that men ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/23 03:18 AM
12

Because you ask what you get out of relationships/friendships with all women, as though they are a monolith, implying incidentally that the answer is "nothing." It's insulting, inaccurate, and getting to be rather dull.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/23 02:01 AM
5

I almost never wear makeup (because I'm not good at it; mom never taught me; seems to irritate my eyes, they water, I look goofy af, etc.), and I've always been able to date several leagues up (in my view; maybe I'm cuter than I think, who knows). It's not the makeup is all I'm saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/23 07:51 PM
2

Yeah- that's a PROBLEM. Homegirl needs to do a deep dive and see why she's resistant to allowing men to potentially become friends. Men- like women- can be great. They can be kind, thoughtful, interesting, empathetic, and funny- just like women. If you refuse to be friends with dudes, you need to engage in some serious reflection.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/23 02:01 AM
1

Nah dude, you are bonkers. Not befriending an individual person regardless of gender is nothing. Ignoring an entire group of people and claiming they are boring freeloaders - except "love" binds you? Bonkers. You don't ACTUALLY want to discuss this, despite having started this post. Many folks have made many solid and compelling points here, and you don't even engage. You just say "no, boys and girls are different." I don't even know why you posted. There is more diversity of thought, feeling, b…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/23 01:45 AM
1

HAHA oh boy. You are spiritual? So sad. Women do not have a purpose beyond existing, adventuring, exploring, trying to make the universe a more interesting place to inhabit (just like dudes). That's WHY you dislike women so much. They are either (in your eyes) "serving their purpose" which necessarily subordinates them to YOU- or not serving their purpose which is "wrong" or simply not aligned with the way things should be/the natural order of things (again- in your view). "The only thing that b…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/23 12:28 AM
7

I think you are just expected to be kind and courteous to everyone regardless of gender. Treating women like garbage when you don't want to sleep with them/they won't sleep with you is what's not "PC." When men refuse friendships with women and state that such friendships are not useful, it will raise eyebrows/questions/judgements, since women have a diversity of interests, many of which will overlap with yours. Based on your statement, I must logically deduce that you spend time speaking/befrie…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/23 12:09 AM
2

Maybe dudes should be more flexible about fucking each other to address this problem...
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/23 10:32 PM
–

This is the most thoughtful coherent post I've seen here in a long time.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/23 02:27 PM
1

The idea that others have it worse means we should stop trying to improve our own circumstances?? Not a great argument. Your post- to an extent lacks cohesion- and makes many assumptions. Maybe I'm just annoyed about all the "women prefer tall/rich men" nonsense. There are many features that make someone potentially attractive to another person, and that statement is reductive as hell, and not even necessarily true on its face. Next- having educational opportunities and working toward equality, …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/23 10:08 PM
1

Maybe these are younger, naive women? My ring was assembled with my grandmother and auntie's engagement diamonds - no new diamonds purchased: and we went to the courthouse and were married by a Justice of the Peace. I was 28 and he was 34 though. Not sure your dating pool...nor am I sure about when my eyes were opened about diamonds and the wedding industry. It is worth noting- there is a lot of brainwashing women need to overcome with regard to their weddings I feel like. I bet this is even mor…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/23 06:40 PM
–

I feel like those are examples of benevolent sexism... and there's certainly some intersectionality involved, but avoiding consequences/accountability for actions - I wouldn't equate that with universal affection. If anything- and I see this born (or is it 'bourn?') out in manosphere type places- women are resented for these types of double-standards (that are primarily perpetrated by men)- causing the opposite effect. I'd be interested in what you think though, if you care to share!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 10:58 PM
–

I'm curious about the belief that women get universal affection. This has not been my experience- but I'm wondering what you have seen, heard, and observed that makes you think this is so?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 10:39 PM
4

I have two separate feelings on that: first- I feel like folks can tell when they are being settled for, and it feels bad; plus, if/when someone better comes along, you'll probably peace out. Second- being alone, to me, is preferable to being with someone who is a bad fit... some dudes must feel this same way, but most on here don't seem to...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 11:15 AM
3

Not really. Mostly I felt annoyed by how it seemed like dudes would date/be with whomever came along, whoever was closest, whoever showed interest. Like they gave no thought to what they really wanted, chemistry, compatibility. It made me feel like I would have to assess that for both of us- even if I was into a dude, if I felt like another woman would be a better fit, I felt I should leave him- give him that chance, because I had no faith he would do it. To an extent PPD has reignited those con…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 12:13 AM
–

As a person who was raped and sexually assaulted while at college- it's not hysteria. If teaching folks about consent, trying to keep people (especially women) safe feels like a concerted effort to reduce intimacy to you... you are absolutely wearing blinders, and perhaps need to remove your head from your ass.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 06:53 PM
1

No part of this is true. Men think highly of men who have been with a lot of women, full stop. Your whole thought-process is flawed. Being with a lot of women is not a predictor of your sexual skill. Maybe being with one woman for a long time- giving you a chance to get to know her quirks, preferences, etc., might indicate something...but being with many women? That makes me think you are probably self-absorbed and selfish- and that DOES translate to the bedroom. A man being a thoughtful, consid…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 06:22 PM
2

We are working on my husband being a house husband. He's been decreasing his time at work each time I get a raise.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 08:40 PM
3

I would agree with your assessment and say this is reasonably consistent with research. It seems that the ACTUAL predictor of being able to mire effectively "pair bond" is related to whether or not they had a secure attachment to their parent(s)/caregiver(s). I would guess that securely attached individuals are less likely to be promiscuous and are also (this part is backed up by research) better able to "pair bond." Both the difficulty pair bonding and promiscuity, if my guess is correct, are c…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 11:13 PM
4

You are witnessing prosocial interactions with casual acquaintances and women seeking to potentially establish a meaningful friendship in its earliest stages. Obviously these things will be rather on the surface/lack depth. Also these are casual public interactions. You won't see women investigating deep philosophical topics in front of a bunch of randos. If you did, it'd be all, "these pseudo-intellectual women, who are they showing off for?"
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 03:51 PM
1

We can add one for the ladies- not posting on Female Dating Strategy...those seem to have some similarly toxic characteristics.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 03:02 PM
6

I've been in relationships with amazing gentlemen. I've gone on dates with dudes, where nothing resulted from said dates. Other dude showed a red flag- gave him fair warning and cut him loose. You think people are mind readers? Gonna just jump to conclusions about someone's character based on a story during a third date, when just getting to know each other? Your criticism is real dumb bud.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 01:56 AM
3

😂😂😂 Those described behaviors are just that of any semi-decent human. Imagine thinking being slightly better than neutral equates to being a "fool" "at the service of women." 😂😂
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 11:07 PM
5

I've exclusively dated amazing men, and am surrounded by magical friends- about 50% of whom are dudes. I went on 3 dates with a good looking guy who told some stories that made him seem like a dick. I told him he shouldn't treat people that way and warned him I wouldn't tolerate it. On date #4 I made a joke about Tosh.O. Not super classy of me in hindsight (but that dude is weird). My date didn't find my joke amusing and told me to go fuck myself. I told him to show himself out, never looked bac…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 11:00 PM
6

All of those factors are essentially irrelevant, especially once you mature/become more secure in the relationship. Is he a good partner? Thoughtful of MY needs (since I'm not a photocopy of an ex)? Do I feel like I won? - no, because he's a fucking person. During his previous relationships he was younger (because- duh the passage of time). His gaining weight= age + the happiness tax (he's not looking for anyone else?). I'm not the other women he's dated; should I expect him to act as though I a…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:52 AM
3

Always the wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 12:06 PM
4

I think OP was looking for some data or reasonable discussion...
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 10:33 PM
2

This pertains to me- but I would hope it would apply to others. When I meet someone I will, of course have an impression of how physically attractive I find them- and how attracted to them I am (related, but slightly different things). Then, assuming a relationship of any nature occurs (friends, regular acquaintances) the degree to which I am attracted to them- and the nature of that attraction- tends to evolve. So- I would be attracted to the individual (and presumably find them attractive) if …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 11:16 PM
3

😂😂😂 STFU. women- and men- are worth more than their ability to orgasm thru penetrative sex every time. Please, see yourself out.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 03:01 AM
0

This could also be stated as: "in order to attract a woman a man must somehow enhance that woman's life" - which, by the way is not always true (hence the happiest people in the U.S. are never-married child-free women) which would be a reasonable premise. Relationships can be tough, but each partner should aspire to bring more benefit than grief/difficulty to the relationship. Having money and being attractive can presumably give you more options- but if that's the only benefit you bring, there …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 08:59 PM
3

Guess I've been fucking that up for the last decade. Husband is gonna be bummed when I tell him.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 12:47 AM
26

Nah. Better to find what roles suit each person best individually. We are working on my husband transitioning to house husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 11:46 PM
1

As someone has already said- men only hate it if they can tell- or if they are told about it when they believed the woman "naturally" looked like that. I do take, what I hope is perhaps your main point- that people shouldn't feel so much pressure to look a certain way. Makeup and body modifications should be enjoyable- not a requirement to feel ok in your own skin. I don't wear makeup- (or rarely wear it) because I'm bad at it, I end up with raccoon face, irritated eyes, and it's just too much u…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 05:33 PM
1

You said motherless more than once. A Freudian coincidence perhaps. I was just calling attention to this. You certainly lack understanding of the human condition. Men or women who opt out of procreating-- since your statements indicate an equal mistrust of both parties in equal measure I'm sure-- are no more flawed than anyone else, and their flaws are separate and apart from their desire to breed. The belief that anyone who doesn't adopt the same worldview that you do means that person "flawed"…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 01:28 AM
1

Motherless women? Again? What post did you read? That's not the topic. I'm childfree- and I have many character flaws but being childfree by choice is not one of them. Try to develop empathy yourself before you procreate.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 11:29 PM
2

Dude- being childfree is not a moral failing. Your belief that it is demonstrates a distinct lack of perspective taking ability. And empathy. Character flaws, jesus. Also, motherless women? What post did you even read. "...speaks to who they are." -presumably someone who is able to consider the consequences of their actions for more than just themselves. Someone who is not cut out for parenthood (the moral equivalent to not being cut out for professional athletics- say, basketball) would be terr…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 10:21 PM
1

So.... this wasn't you? "Also, every guy has a mother who selflessly cared and loved them. So, by not wanting a mother, it likely means you don't carry these same qualities we love and respect in our own moms." My brother and I were planned for and wanted- at least before we arrived. According to my grandmother the only thing my mother ever wanted to be was a mom. That didn't stop her from beating on us. I know quite a few people who didn't plan on or seek out parenthood who are a fuck of a lot …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 09:27 PM
1

This made me vomit, first off. And I can promise you, not every guy has this "selfless mother" you mention. Unless the verbal and physical abuse inflicted by my mother- on both me and my brother (him in particular- likely because he's older) is this selfless care you are describing? It's much more compassionate to look at your own childhood experiences, assess how they shaped you; review the genetic components involved (anxiety, depression + god only know), consider what you've inherited from bo…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 08:59 PM
4

This is a fantastic and thoughtful post, and brings up a lot of thought-provoking questions- which I will be reflecting on. I just didn't want to wait to mention to you how heartened I was by your post. Joining this community- this is what I had been hoping for: thoughtful discourse. Once I've had a chance to reflect- if I can add anything to the discussion that hasn't been stated, I will...but wanted to be sure you at least knew the heartening effect your post has had on at least 1 individual.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 11:23 AM
3

My husband would. EDIT: date and marry actually!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 10:36 PM
-1

Women don't care. We just think they are lame and maybe worth an eye roll. 🙄
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/23 01:03 AM
1

First- there's no way one person can actually know that. Second- women are people...just treat them like people. No deception. You'll be surprised where that will get you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 01:46 AM
4

I have to know the women you all are interacting with. Outside the "female dating strategy" ladies, women do not think like this past 12th grade. Maybe I just don't exist on the same sphere as the dudes on reddit. I don't fuckin' know. But you gotta realize- depending on what you are lying about, you've gotta figure the woman either does or will know...then, the jig is up... if it's not- guess it wasn't actually important to start with...
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 01:29 AM
22

I thought your premise was one of good faith. If people are being dishonest/leading people on/tricking people-- that's a dick move. But, if that's the kind of guy someone is, the woman should feel glad when dude leaves (trash took itself out). But (assuming dude just changed his mind- decided they aren't a good fit) - you cannot control how people interpret your actions. Doesn't mean you are wrong to do it. There are things people may disagree based on interpretation... Doesn't mean they are rig…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 12:55 AM
1

That's good advice. Do the right thing, even when it's hard...and try to have a thick enough skin to know folks won't always interpret your actions the way they are intended. Try to be good to people. Learn, grow, do your best, accept your mistakes... but you can't control how others interpret your actions. You are only in control of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/23 11:19 PM
27

No kidding. Either party can end a relationship at any time for any reason they choose- regardless of whether the other party deems it a good reason or not. Nobody is entitled to a relationship. Where I'm lost is... who has been arguing the contrary? This feels like an argument men come up with to counter the point of "men aren't entitled to sex. Women are not vending machines who distribute sex if given enough 'nice guy' coins." Like... this should be obvious...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/23 11:14 PM
1

Want to agree with others- "too nice" generally means you don't have boundaries and prioritize other people (or- more likely- enable others to prioritize themselves) over your self. (Sorry, that's grammatically messy, but I think you get it.) You go with the flow and don't assert your own preferences. This is problematic for a couple of specific reasons. 1- I cannot tell if my behavior is actually pleasing to you (are you really cool with what's happening or just "going along to get along") whic…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/23 10:52 PM
3

Well put!
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/23 06:04 PM
4

Women who LIKE men LIKE MEN. If a woman chooses to be with a man to avoid poverty or becoming a social outcast- that is not a good thing. My father taught me "if you are going to get married, to it because you want to- not because you have to." Why are so many dudes content with the idea of their wife wanting to leave them, if only doing so wouldn't ruin everything she's built? Don't they realize such a woman is always looking for an out, in that situation? Is it really so fucking hard to be a d…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/23 06:01 PM
15

False. But WHY is it ok for a guy to be promiscuous if it's not for a woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 04:16 AM
18

No, not really. I mean, you'd have to define who is actually promiscuous, in reality. Most of those dudes imagine that any woman who isn't humping them is, on the sly, humping 20 other dudes. But this is all fiction, so these numb nuts can rationalize their hatred of women. It's not reality based. As a woman who is friends with women; as a woman who is friends with a dozen+ AMAZING men; as a woman who has slept with 1 dude for the past 13 years; red pillers do NOT see women (or men for that matt…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 04:03 AM
–

Sugar pie, red pillers aren't right about nearly anything. They can have thoughts about who they themselves might would want to date, but painting with a broad brush about who is going to be a good partner, generally isn't advisable. So no, they aren't right.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 03:55 AM
15

What's your actual fucking point? Are you just being annoying because your one buddy is out of town or something?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 03:51 AM
–

I think red pillers should avoid all women.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 03:47 AM
–

I guess it's just your analogy is stupid. Sorry bro. To what you maybe were trying to ask: "Should a dude date a woman who behaves in ways that negatively impact his sense of self in hopes he can change her into who he wants her to be, by using tactics of emotional manipulation?" No. Obviously. Folks should not date people in hopes of changing them. Give this promiscuity shit a rest.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 03:41 AM
6

You keep making that same response- but won't extrapolate what it is about this woman that gives evidence to this alleged "promiscuity."
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 03:35 AM
20

I'm sorry- what makes us think she's promiscuous in the first place? If you say it's sharing videos demonstrating skill wearing the usual attire one wears for said activity, please prepare for an eye roll. Regardless- those dudes' issues enable them to avoid (read: be avoided by) women with a variety of worldviews regarding sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 03:28 AM
1

Oooh! I like this question! Context- married for 10 years, together for 13. He has a very even temper- rarely becomes angry (even when the Red Sox lose to the Yankees, he can regulate his emotions). He is thoughtful and a great caregiver- does most of the cooking in our household. Can be vulnerable (cried when we lost our puppers due to old age and didn't try to hide it). Supports my efforts to be the primary earner in our household, and happily transitioning to a house husband (I love working a…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 11:51 AM
1

Also, just as a side note- you 100% missed the point. I will try to succinctly summarize it for you: If American women are viewed in a negative light for not being submissive, for pushing for a more egalitarian society; if that is viewed as negative by specific groups of men; if those men choose to avoid American women for that reason- then good. We don't give a fuck- except to be very pleased that such men will give us a wide berth. That is an ideal outcome.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/23 03:35 PM
1

Ahh yes, comparing murder/clear human rights violations with cultural mores. Very profound response. Very solid and applicable argument. Two thumbs up.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/23 03:03 PM
2

I actually won't think of you at all after this moment. 😊
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 06:12 PM
0

It is comical. You do hate women, generally. If you need to have and exercise your leverage over a group of people (women actually are people btw) to be able to tolerate them, you hate them. You don't actually view women as people though, so I can see why you might deny feeling that way. So maybe I should correct my statement- if you viewed women as people independent from men you would despise them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 05:56 PM
-1

Judging one culture using the values of another culture as the baseline isn't useful, just right off the bat. This is a practice used by many Americans and leads to ethnocentricity, xenophobia, among other things. Using those same ethnocentric practices on Americans will not yield results that are more valid. A very vocal and large minority of men (not most men, but a sizable minority) do not like that many women have begun to realize they are no longer dependent on men for their survival, and a…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 05:02 PM
4

Women do not pursue their passions with any thoughts about how it impacts their attractiveness. The only potential thought a woman might have with regard to this is- enrolling in higher education and working in a good job brings you into contact with men who also value education and whatever it is about your profession you find appealing. However- it is distressing how many men find well-educated women to be off-putting simply because they are well-educated. I hang out with a dozen+ dudes who ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 10:20 PM
–

Not really.... just seems like a maladaptive worldview to me. Unless you 100% agree...then maybe I do get it?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 05:59 PM
–

I don't "get" thinking this way. It is a perspective or worldview- it's not some objective truth about reality. It is a lens through which you interpret the things you see. It's not "how it works.' It's an interpretation only. And, like I said, it doesn't seem to be helpful.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 05:37 PM
–

I honestly just don't get it. I feel like these types of analyses are only adding to people's difficulties in finding and maintaining meaningful relationships. Viewing ourselves- and potential dating partners-as commodities... like cars losing 10% of our value once driven off the lot. I'm all about understanding human behavior etc., but this type of thinking is- I would argue, completely unhelpful.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 04:19 PM
1

I do think it's funny that you specifically said: it's entirely dependent on who the majority of people find desirable. there is nothing bullshit about it. Because the first sentence is in fact bullshit....but then you state emphatically that it's not. Maybe because other than celebrities, there's no way of knowing who "the majority of people find desirable." Spending time with various friend groups, most of whom are in long-term committed relationships with a great deal of divergent characteris…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 10:12 PM
17

What is "high value" -as a man or woman? I'm 38 a woman, child-free, married for more than a decade, 2 master's degrees, fully employed in "big job" jobs since 24. Part-time work since 17. Married to a Ph.D. clinical psychologist- his 2nd marriage, my 1st. No children. 43 year old man. Both with healthy BMIs. I am just so put off with this "high value" business. I've had romantic relationships with dudes from 5'3" through 6'0"+. Were they fun? Funny? Clever? Thoughtful? In all cases YES. Did the…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 01:30 AM
4

It is zero percent important- if you want a real genuine relationship. If you just want someone seeking to improve their own status through association with you....well, don't date people like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 01:06 AM
2

I'm going to need more clarification.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 05:15 PM
4

That's just not how it works. If that is true, your explanation is actually the cause of the problem. Assuming each woman has her pick of dudes implies (mathematically) that every dude (single or not apparently) will commit to about a hundred different women. That means that you pair up indiscriminately. This means that if another woman comes along, you are just as likely to be with her. It means you want to pair up because we have sacks of fat (boobs) and holes where you like them. We are fucki…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 05:12 PM
3

Huh?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 05:03 PM
2

Umm, yeah, that's not exactly true. If it were, sticking around with one man would not be a problem- since according to you women can gain attention without having to give sex or enter into a relationship - meaning women can be in a relationship with one dude and get attention from other dudes... Also- all this talk about "getting attention from men/women." Pretty sure what you are referring to is having friends. The attention I get is from men and women...and it's through the interactions I hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 05:02 PM
18

Men will be at a disadvantage until they realize women will only want to be with them if they improve the life of the prospective partner. The opposite is also true- men should seek to couple with someone who improves their life...but since women now have enough rights etc., to be self sufficient (read: are not dependent upon men for resources and livelihood) this is a paradigm shift.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 12:42 AM
1

Nahhhh
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/22 12:29 AM
9

Extravagant versus higher than my budget are not mutually inclusive. Besides the AD/HD prohibits my reading your lengthy post. I got stuff to do. And even if something is within my means doesn't mean I feel comfortable spending that much money.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 01:42 PM
8

It's fine- but my budget will dictate how nice/expensive the living accommodations are, and how we budget for living expenses. We aren't living like our salaries are identical -at the level HE makes- and then splitting things 50/50. We are living like we BOTH make what I make and splitting things 50/50. He can use what's left for fun money, savings, retirement, whatever...but we aren't leaving me without any cash for rainy days....
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 01:38 PM
2

I suspect most folks hang out with those with those with similar preferences to them regarding casual sex. As someone who is demisexual, I've never felt any which way re: special and rare versus typical for any sexual activity I did or did not engage in. Doubt most other women give it a second thought- unless point-blank asked.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 01:33 PM
4

Someone he is attracted to, considers to be a good fit for him, and the two have complimentary expectations for how to build a household and what it means to be a partner. Oh, and this isn't just for "high value" men, which is a fucking bullshit concept, but is applicable to any grown person seeking a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 10:32 PM
2

If you are asked and feel comfortable doing so- go for it. Otherwise just don't do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/22 03:09 AM
8

Not in the least.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/22 08:15 PM
1

There do seem to be folks who view their "worth" -and that of others- based on aspects that have nothing to do with their ability to be a good partner, despite that being the topic of discussion. Being extremely attractive, being rich, having social status- none of these things mean you'll be a good partner. It makes sense that women who are in circumstances that make them believe that their physical attractiveness means they are "worth more" would want that "worth" to be on display, in the form…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 04:21 PM
1

It's really more of a goodness of fit type thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 04:12 AM
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