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xander1026 Archive

View 0 posts and 70 comments by xander1026 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
7

The original post was talking about MDMA, not marijuana, which I think is an important detail. (And people usually don't call using MDMA "getting stoned", hence my comment.)
/r/MensRights04/04/13 05:37 PM
2

That can also be really irritating and increase the likelihood of at least the lady contracting an STI, so you know. And they aren't super effective at sperm killing.
/r/MensRights27/12/12 06:41 AM
10

Wait, where do these kids go? That's not fair to anyone, that's just unilaterally shitty.
/r/MensRights27/12/12 06:37 AM
8

So much less creepy!
/r/seduction24/10/12 03:33 AM
2

Or maybe I don't subscribe to the idea that evolutionary psych is descriptive of biological fact, but primarily of culturally prescribed roles. And, seriously, your comment was the most hateful way you could have possibly come up with an extremely hateful way to make a claim you think that you can back up with (pseudo)science.
/r/MensRights18/10/12 12:35 AM
-1

Right, my bad, women should be limited because biology. Glad you called me on that one.
/r/MensRights18/10/12 12:25 AM
1

Okay, seriously, arguing that women are biologically limited isn't helpful to men's rights and is immature and silly. Let's just not.
/r/MensRights18/10/12 12:20 AM
1

So, should women not be for men's rights? This doesn't have to be a zero-sum game.
/r/MensRights18/10/12 12:11 AM
3

....Wow.
/r/MensRights18/10/12 12:08 AM
3

Seriously, do you not think that rape victims have a hard enough time without having to put up with this bullshit? Are your stupid, immature jokes really worth that? Stop being such a fucking jerk.
/r/MensRights17/10/12 11:34 PM
1

I'm pretty sure that reasonable people all agree that both are wrong. They're both super fucked up and awful, and unacceptable no matter the gender. That being said, I think that we all know that they're justifying capitalizing on Hulk Hogan with, well, capital.
/r/MensRights16/10/12 10:16 PM
1

On the other hand, if you were getting a prostrate exam and someone said, "Hey, is it cool if these med students watch?", it might be a little different. Audiences: the worst.
/r/MensRights10/10/12 03:06 AM
1

I get what you're saying, but gynecology/midwifery, uh, is kind of gynocentric as a field. It is heavily focused on women and their bodies, because, by definition, women and women's bodies are the only ones giving birth. I feel that the author rounds this out pretty nicely, as she says that the men going into the profession deserve support. And, while I would say that it's potentially silly for people to care about the gender of their medical professionals, I would stop before insisting that "hi…
/r/MensRights10/10/12 03:04 AM
1

It also happens to some women between periods, as a result of hormonal birth control, as a result of stress/menstrual cycles being thrown off, after the insertion of an IUD... I mean, yeah, it can happen during pregnancy, and word on the street is that it's pretty common in early pregnancy, but that's certainly not the most common cause of spotting.
/r/MensRights10/10/12 02:43 AM
1

Do I sit by and allow her to blatantly insinuate that I and every man I know puts her at immediate risk when she wants to pee She's not necessarily afraid of you. Lots of girls don't want to shit at their boyfriend's places, or at their friends houses, or anywhere that they could be heard/smelled. Maybe it's a relic from high school when people would make fun of girls that left a stinky bathroom, maybe it's because women are supposed to shit rainbows and flowers. But, really, there are reasons t…
/r/MensRights08/10/12 03:04 PM
1

Well, yeah. Because if you really want to get the women that respond to those tactics, then maybe your priorities are a bit out of order.
/r/MensRights08/10/12 02:53 PM
0

So, how do you explain traditionally attractive lesbians?
/r/MensRights03/10/12 06:24 AM
-1

Well, how would you feel if someone said "Oh, false rape allegations aren't a big deal. Just don't get involved with any of the women that would ever do that, and, really, just don't ever be in any situation where someone could accuse you of rape." That's silly and counterproductive and doesn't address the problem in a way that's livable.
/r/MensRights03/10/12 06:22 AM
1

This is an honest question, and I'm afraid that tone won't come across well, but I want to be clear that I'm aiming for constructive discussion. I know that one of the frustrations of many men is that they feel that all men are treated like rapists, and if you aren't a rapist, that's hurtful and dehumanizing. I get that. However, when you say things like "Don't go to sketchy places, don't put yourself in positions you could be overpowered in," etc., what I take from that is mostly "If you're abs…
/r/MensRights03/10/12 06:13 AM
2

Interestingly, there are some studies that indicate that rapists are more likely to target more quiet or meek targets, rather than very social or confidant targets (it's two in the morning, so googling is a little beyond me at the moment), and dressing particularly modestly is a marker of said meekness. Which isn't an admonishment to modestly-dressing ladies, it's just interesting. Also, uh, let's be real: how many more people pass out from ingestion of alcohol every weekend than any other type …
/r/MensRights03/10/12 05:57 AM
8

Could you have put more generalizations in that statement?
/r/MensRights03/10/12 05:45 AM
1

So, wait, people can or can't complain about the lack of people with a characteristic they have in a field without being in that field? I wish there were more female legislators, but I'm busy being a woman in a STEM field. I wish there were more primary school teachers that are men, but I'm not the right gender for that, and, honestly, I think it's a pretty shitty field. I don't think I understand your argument, if it's "You can't notice that something is wrong unless you, personally, are addres…
/r/MensRights02/10/12 04:17 PM
1

On the other hand, do you really think that women- even women with good intentions that have worked hard to understand your experiences, and are thinking about you and your life- really understand what it's like to be a man, and all of the things that come with it? What about a woman that's never even thought about how her life is different from the lives of men? Would she represent your interests as they relate to your gender as well as a man? Do you really think that wealthy politicians from w…
/r/MensRights02/10/12 03:30 AM
1

In the U.S., there's no mandated paid parental leave, and unpaid parental leave is only required for large companies. Yeah, our country is kind of awful.
/r/MensRights02/10/12 03:11 AM
7

It's really hard for a woman to walk down the street/take public transportation/go running in public/exist in public spaces without being harassed, at least in larger cities. It's something that one can adapt to and ignore, but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen a lot.
/r/MensRights02/10/12 03:06 AM
1

As an example, I've seen some people argue that women overwhelmingly getting custody is actually sexist against women by forcing them into the mother/provider role and blah blah obvious nonsense. I've heard that argument, but with the causality reversed- because women have always been seen as caretakers and boxed into that role, and men have been seen as being less capable of nurturing than men, we've ended up in a place where women are always assumed to be better caretakers than men. That isn't…
/r/MensRights02/10/12 03:03 AM
8

I don't think that the intention is to blame men; the intention is to call attention to the fact that legislators are almost all men, which is both because fewer women, for whatever reason (I suspect it's in no small part because politics isn't friendly to having/rearing children), are involved in politics. I don't think that many people vote based on gender; I'd rather have a lefty guy than a Tea Party woman legislating, but I also wish that our legislative body were more reflective of our popu…
/r/MensRights02/10/12 02:58 AM
1

I'm not entirely sure what your a.) point is trying to say, could you rephrase that, please? What I'm trying to say is that, as compassionate human beings, if someone comes to us and says "I was raped, it was awful, please give me comfort/what should I do/this is a part of who I am,", we should assume that they aren't lying and give them the emotional support and validation that they need. That is completely different from saying that our justice system should convict without evidence, which it …
/r/MensRights01/10/12 08:22 PM
1

On that note, while I don't think that anyone should be convicted if their guilt can't be proven, that doesn't mean that we should assume that rape victims are lying about being rape victims just because they can't prove it in court. They still deserve support, even if they don't have ironclad evidence of rape. And, hey, just like our justice system is set up around the idea that "Letting ten guilty men people go free is better than have one innocent man person punished", it's better to comfort …
/r/MensRights01/10/12 07:41 PM
1

I think it depends upon who you ask; Third Wave Feminism is pretty open about things needing to change for men, too, and acknowledging the issues with previous waves of feminism. And... I don't think that MRAs are THAT open about how prevalent the extreme end is. There's a whole lot of upvoted misogyny floating around.
/r/MensRights01/10/12 06:47 PM
1

That's true, but you can also not say things that are difficult to parse in context, because they're only going to get worse out of context. Especially because the original comment was pretty bad, even in context.
/r/MensRights01/10/12 04:45 PM
1

The problem with comparing rapists to attacking bulls is that it feeds the idea that, any man, if you get him angry/around/present the opportunity, is a rapist. That is not true. Saying that if you get drunk, you can't expect someone not to rape you is fucking ridiculous, and it give rapists- male and female- a way to excuse actions that are inexcusable. You can piss off any bull enough to kill someone, but the vast majority of people are not going to rape anyone, under any circumstances, and yo…
/r/MensRights01/10/12 04:21 PM
3

Or you could find out how many girls have reported being raped (freedom of information) at that college, then post the raw numbers. It'll likely in the the region of 2 per year, this would highlight how exaggerated this issue is. Seems like this one could trigger those two girls though, so might be better to leave it. The problem with this is that rape is really underreported. It's often difficult to prove that rape happened, and people reporting rape face a lot of skepticism. A lot of rape vict…
/r/MensRights01/10/12 04:16 PM
1

I'd think that posters for male rape victims could potentially be more helpful in a lot of ways (although a gender-neutral "Hey kids, consent is important and you need it from your potential partner, no matter if they're a guy or a girl!" poster is also a really fucking good idea), mostly because a lot of guys don't realize what sort of resources are available. I don't ever really pay attention to the drop-test policy in my classes; I don't ever have test scores I need to drop. So, if I get a po…
/r/MensRights01/10/12 04:08 PM
2

Many of the comments in /r/mensrights are reasonable, just like most feminists are reasonable. The extremists are the loudest, though, and that's who people hear and what people see. I think it's disingenuous to say that /r/mensrights doesn't have quite a few people that are misogynistic, just like feminism isn't devoid of misandry. It's important for both MRAs and feminists to call out the extremists in their groups, instead of just pointing fingers at the unreasonable factions in other movemen…
/r/MensRights01/10/12 04:06 PM
3

The problem is that if we're going to treat /r/mensrights as a serious place for serious discussion about equality issues, Poe's Law is very much in order. If you're going to say something obviously sexist, and you're not making it clear that you're being satirical, then people will judge the movement by the things that these members of the movement have said. Words have meanings, and people will take your words at face value. Think of all the times there are posts here that have a screenshot of…
/r/MensRights01/10/12 04:01 PM
3

Hey, call me crazy, but maybe, just maybe, rape is the correlate of rape, and the constructive thing would be to have posters letting guys that have been raped know that they have access to these resources, to.
/r/MensRights01/10/12 03:51 PM
1

In the field of nursing men are seen as sexually insatiable and violent. The women are not trying to retain any power- they genuinely believe men can't help raping and so do not want to risk exposing other valuable women or children to him. While I'm sure there are some people that think this, I think another (and potentially larger) part of this is the way people think of "women" jobs- teaching, nursing, soft sciences, raising children. Men tend to get a lot of scorn for being in these occupati…
/r/MensRights01/10/12 02:56 PM
1

Do you really want to be judged by the foaming-at-the-mouth, horribly misogynistic MRAs? How 'bout we not judge all feminists by the opinions of people that are obviously young and haven't had enough time or experience to develop nuanced views?
/r/MensRights01/10/12 02:45 PM
1

Because the classical definitions are systemic; it's about racist/sexist ideas+power, allowing for systemic discrimination. So, the "minority" (which is not necessarily the numerical minority; it is the group that does not have power) can hate members of the "majority" (again, not numerical), but they don't have the power to be sexist/racist. Now, sexist/racist is used colloquially to mean "people being jerks to each other because of sex/race", which is different from the academic definition. Th…
/r/MensRights01/10/12 02:43 PM
0

Name-calling doesn't help win anyone over, though. You call someone a cunt (or a dick, or a prick), and you've already lost; they're no longer listening. Name-calling makes you feel better, it doesn't help them understand how their perspective could be wrong. On top of that, words like "cunt" are really charged; I'd argue that you couldn't find a word more likely to piss people off. It makes him look bad, and it alienates lots of reasonable people that might otherwise listen to his argument. You…
/r/MensRights01/10/12 02:36 PM
2

it's primarily used to snooker men into financially catastrophic contracts and situations Seriously? C'mon, there's ways to be an MRA without falling into the "hating all women" trap. I get that you're frustrated, but the majority of adults, both men and women, generally act rationally in ways that are not manipulative or intentionally hurtful.
/r/MensRights01/10/12 02:30 PM
3

It really frustrates me how difficult it can be on this subreddit to make reasonable statements like "Both feminism and the men's rights movements have unreasonable extremists, but the vast majority of reasonable people of both movements have a lot in common, work towards the same goals, and would benefit from understanding each other's positions better and working together."
/r/MensRights01/10/12 02:25 PM
3

Seriously? Are you surprised that nobody takes this movement seriously, when people say shit like this in MRA space?
/r/MensRights27/09/12 11:07 AM
12

It's also shitty anti-feminism. I mean, I think most of the anti-feminism here is circle-jerking anyway, but it's not like this is even a feminist issue.
/r/MensRights27/09/12 03:46 AM
91

Okay, call me crazy, but I don't think this is a Men's Rights issue. Was this woman acting with infinite maturity and grace? No. Was this woman doing anything wrong? ALSO no. She did something kind of goofy with a new partner that symbolically destroyed the vestiges of her relationship with her husband. On top of that, NOBODY is calling this feminist, or a feminist victory, but you. It's the Daily Mail, for goodness sake.
/r/MensRights27/09/12 12:05 AM
0

That's fair. And I'm well within my rights to decide that, if someone makes an offensive joke, I won't be their friend, sleep with them, and I'll do my best to reduce their power over me (or figure out proper channels to report to, if it becomes an issue). I can also tell them that I think they're being a jackass, or at least insensitive. Not censorship, but people still bitch when others don't find their shitty jokes funny.
/r/MensRights26/09/12 03:06 AM
2

I suspect there's a combination of a lot of things. There's likely a biological aspect in men experiencing more severe illnesses. And, as you mentioned, there are social issues at play- if you're sick, you're sick, and it doesn't have much to do with your masculinity. On the other hand, women are more often caretakers, which is a job that doesn't really have time off, and also constantly brings you in contact with the disgusting germballs that are children. So, that might result in both more min…
/r/MensRights26/09/12 12:33 AM
0

So, if someone lies about rape, or if you yelled a racial slur, or about your ability to provide childcare is it "just words"? It's not, and it's immature to make that argument. Words affect us in real ways, and there's no way to argue otherwise. It's like arguing that currency has no value because it's made of paper- it's simply not true. Also, there's a big difference between being censored and having the sense not to say things that are hurtful and offensive, just like there's a big differenc…
/r/MensRights25/09/12 10:15 PM
6

Ideally, yeah, someone should take care of that little girl; she didn't do anything wrong. But should the biological father have to change his entire life to accommodate that? Ideally all children would have parents, but that doesn't mean I'm going to go out and adopt all of the unloved babies, even if that's the "right" thing to do.
/r/MensRights24/09/12 06:42 PM
4

What that woman did was unreasonable and illegal and not okay (at all), but, seriously, what the hell should be done with the kid? I mean, clearly he's more fit for custody, and if he wants it, he should definitely get it, but what if he doesn't? It's really, really shitty to find out that your ex-wife had a baby with your sperm, but it'd be even worse to find out your ex-wife had a baby with your sperm and OH WHOOPS NOW YOU HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF IT. ENJOY THE NEXT EIGHTEEN YEARS.
/r/MensRights24/09/12 04:19 PM
2

I'd disagree. I think it's very much intended for adults, despite the framing with farm animals.
/r/MensRights23/09/12 08:48 AM
1

Sorry, I didn't differentiate that very clearly. I was trying to make the point that freeze responses do happen in other traumatic circumstances, and are pretty well recorded, and, in addition to freeze responses, there are other logical reasons to not try to fight off someone.
/r/MensRights21/09/12 05:53 PM
4

But, if you're already in close contact with someone way bigger than you that has already shown that they don't give a fuck about violating boundaries, why the hell would you want to make them more angry or more violent? And, actually, you do see it in child/domestic abuse. And how many people do you know that decide to fight muggers? Or punch a bank robber while they're being held hostage? There's an inherent freeze response, and there's also a point at which people understand that it's stupid …
/r/MensRights21/09/12 05:45 PM
5

Actually, a lot of that goes on in the media, anyway (wooo politics!). It's interesting, though, how many doctors are so highly critical of people's reproductive choices, particularly when it comes to young people that want to remain childless.
/r/MensRights13/09/12 03:06 PM
0

That makes sense in a lot of ways, and I understand how large groups make for a lot of jerks. So, I would think that for large cons, there'd be a lot of thought going into how to prevent that. And, as with any type of speech, I think the solution isn't a blanket ban so much some careful thought about what's being communicated. Yeah, pretty ladies that are probably interested in what you're interested in are really, really exciting! Still, if (general, not TomBaynes) you saw a guy at that booth/i…
/r/MensRights11/09/12 04:10 AM
0

It's not even that uncommon to find nerdy guys being hazed and belittled for being nerdy in a nerdy context. I understand that in online gaming communities, to some extent, because there’s enough anonymity and competition to let it flourish. I’m surprised that there isn’t more self-policing by the gaming community, because hostility is so unpleasant for everyone. I think that even more so for cons, and other real-life get-togethers. Everyone is really quick to tell me that guys have it the same …
/r/MensRights10/09/12 11:57 PM
0

Happens mostly because women are still kind of a rarity in geek groups (geeky women often form their own). Just stick through it, crack some jokes, decline advances nicely and you'll be "one of the dudes" in no time. That works really well in small groups, and that's how I fit in with most of my geeky friends (and how I'm interested in the first place!). It falls apart when you're in a place where there's no way for everyone to know you, and that you aren't interested in being hit on. And... I g…
/r/MensRights10/09/12 11:05 PM
1

Then why does the community not do a better job of policing? I'd say that both of those things are potentially (but not always or necessarily) worse for women, because they're already in a place where they're unsure and potentially unwanted, but it really shouldn't matter; why is this community not more proactive about calling out it's jerks? I'd say that the creep cards use very loaded language, but having a "you made me uncomfortable, please stop" kind of card isn't a bad thing at all. And, ho…
/r/MensRights10/09/12 10:57 PM
3

I think that geek culture is less accessible to women for both those reasons. I'm a girl/woman, and I wasn't really allowed to have any access to screen media when I was growing up (though I did read some Pern books, go figure). Now, there are lots of things (Video games! Zombies! Some but not all fantasy and sci-fi!) that are a part of "geek" culture that are really appealing, and I have quite a few friends that are excited about and willing to introduce me to lots of cool, geeky things. Which …
/r/MensRights10/09/12 07:52 PM
3

The thing is, a lot of female birth control sucks, too. Hormonal birth control makes many women gain weight, have mood changes (depression), lose sex drive, among other side effects. It can increase your risk for breast cancer, and, super disconcertingly, change the men that you're attracted to. Also, most inexpensive birth control options have to be taken every day to be effective, and that's a whole lot of room for human error. What about other forms of birth control, you say? Diaphragms and s…
/r/MensRights01/09/12 01:24 AM
2

Yes, the draft is only enacted when they need soldiers for fighting. But when you have more soldiers, you need more support personnel- you need more cooks and more medics, more clerks and more supply troops. It's not like everyone that enlists voluntarily is shunted into non-combat roles so that people that are drafted can fight.
/r/MensRights27/08/12 02:51 PM
1

It's not like everyone that's drafted ends up on the front lines, and, increasingly, where and what "the front line" is is being blurred. I think any man that's been drafted and wasn't on the front lines would argue that it affected him directly, so I'm not sure what the point that you're making is.
/r/MensRights27/08/12 02:29 PM
1

And I was pointing out (not particularly clearly, I suppose) that men only have one reversible birth control option at the moment, which doesn't exactly "layer" well. So, affordable birth control for women is important for me.
/r/MensRights24/08/12 05:03 PM
2

Entirely true! But it's a bad idea to wear two condoms.
/r/MensRights24/08/12 02:20 PM
2

Not to be a jerk, but maybe you should look into your Women's Center. I'd be really surprised if you saw that. One of the benefits of things like rape counselling centers is that most don't turn away male victims. Even though they're presented as a women's rights "thing", they tend to provide service to everyone. I'm sure there are lots of exceptions, and it could just be that my state is super progressive, but I wouldn't bank on that.
/r/MensRights24/08/12 02:19 PM
2

There we go, paying for one partner's birth control is paying for the birth control of both partners.
/r/MensRights24/08/12 12:15 PM
3

Oh, sorry, didn't read clearly. Makes this make a lot more sense. Still, a lot of them will offer rape counselling to men (it's something I've looked inquired after, because having support structure is super important), but I would suspect it's more variable.
/r/MensRights24/08/12 02:29 AM
1

Most Women's Clinics serve as sexual health clinics for both/any sexes, and aren't exclusively female. I mean, it depends upon where, but they generally offer services to everyone.
/r/MensRights24/08/12 02:13 AM
7

To be fair, Women's Clinics at most universities are sexual health clinics for everyone. They offer gynecological services, yeah, but they generally cater to sexual health needs of everyone. One can also make the argument that paying for ladies birth control is also paying for birth control for the other person that contributes gametes, but that's a little shakier. one partner's birth control is paying for the birth control of both partners.
/r/MensRights24/08/12 02:11 AM
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