My situation:

1) I live in Utah.

2) 3 kids (4, 6, and 13)... The thirteen year old is not legally mine and her real Dad is dead.

3) No SA or Divorce filed 4) No legal representation yet 5) We both live at home 6) No restraining orders

Basically we've lived years together unhappily. We've been married just over 9 years. I'm a correctional officer and National Guardsmen with a college education. She is a gas station cashier. I make roughly $40K a year. There are some underlying things I could use against her although I don't know if I want to take it that far.

My property that my home sits on was gifted to me by my Parents... I made the stupid decision to put her on the deed.

So... What's my best option in this state to keep my home, get the best and ideal situation regarding parental rights, and pay her the least amount of money?