After swallowing the fuckin red pill im just so fucking angry. Like u gotta be kidding me. It hurts to know that you're nothing, invisble, less than human to the gender you're attracted to & the pain cuts even deeper knowing that all the women who treated me like i wasnt important would treat someone else COMPLETELY different (chad) even when you've done nothing wrong. I cant help but envy Chad. Not gonna lie. Life on easy mode - living like a pussy king. A dream. Its crazy how dark and dreadful it makes me deeply feel. I wish i was never red pilled a bit tbh. Ignorance was bliss. Now i cant help but just be pissed that im nothing unless im "useful/used as a tool" & women are fucking great at hiding this shit. Its fuckin nuts. I feel so angry that i was nieve for this fucking long. I bet my last GF was fucking some other dude considering she dumped me out of the blue yet told my best friend at the time that she was into someone else while we were dating. She told my best friend not to tell me becuase she was gonna tell me which was a lie. When my friend told me years later, he was shocked because he thought she told me. After taking the red pill, everything about women and stories that ive heard and im currently hearing start to add up. I literally feel repulsed by women now becuase i feel like any woman i hookup with will be sloppy seconds from some chad that didnt put a quarter of my effort in. Its devastating to my heart. Fuck everything. I feel so apathetic to life now. Like ive lost my soul. I wish i can go back to being ignorant to this. I bet every girl i was into who was playing games with me was letting some other dude fuck her brains out while id text her for months for a chance... I should go to bed but i cant sleep. Im to busy crying ( I never cry tbh but idc im hurt).