I'm a 21 yo from brazil, your avarage joe and this week its carnival in the whole country, i live in fortaleza and here things are a bit lower but still party everywhere. Since i stopped working out due to working full time now and going to class at night, my free time I usually sleep but this week I've been parting with a few friends and yesterday I met a gal that messed with my head so god dam hard. Im no dating god nor anything, I only had a girlfriend and it lasted for 3 weeks and another one for a month and a half because I cant stand being tougether with someone but this one that I met last night, has changed me in a way that I cant describe, i never felt like that. I read stuff here all the time about girls that seems like angels and I cant wrap my head around that shes going to behave in such manner even though I know she will, soon or later. I cant get her out of my head, I watched videos I played some games but this one has stuck like a music that i cant get out of my head. I dont know why im making this thread but since most of the people here are older than me and have more experience, I would appreciate your help. If this post is against the rules or category, sorry but I needed to vent this in a way that I wont show too much of myself because I tend to keep things with me until I cant take anymore and just write it down to delete later.

I keep telling to myself that we are born alone and we die alone, even though i know there are people that care about me, but I cant stand all this things going on in my head right now. I sometimes think about going to a psychologist but I dont know if they can help me with it, I mean, if this is the 100% truth, in which I belive it is, about female nature and the psychologist be a man that doesnt belive it, how things are going to get solved? Im not even pointing it to be a woman, because it would be against my belives that she could help me. I just wanted all this things going on to stop. I know they will eventually calm down but why do we have to go through all of this, thats whats makes me think like a retarted when compared to the grand scheme of things. I like astronomy (but cant study it since my city doesnt offer this course and I dont have enough money to go to another state to do it and I cant study in my free time because I prefer to play games or read something else) and when I see the whole scale of the visible universe, all I want to do is cry like a lost child and takes some time for me to get back in to my senses again. All of this could just be some rambling stuff that i write when im sad but this is so fucking confusing, everything.