Like many of you I have learned the term Shit Test in the PUA literature. Of course, as soon as I saw the description I recognized it immediately: I have experienced that before in my life, and I didn't like it a bit. And since I sucked at countermeasures, I wrote it off as "If she does shit tests, she's a bitch and I want nothing to do with her".

Later on, from PUA I graduated to TRP, and there I saw TRP message as a lot more than just game in order to get laid, I saw TRP as an opportunity for personal growth and living a meaningful life, with women as an incidental accessory in one's life. TRP spoke to me as an individual unencumbered from wanting to appeal to women: it was very liberating. And I remember reading something, an article or a post or a discussion, that talked about shit tests at work coming from everywhere: from men and women, from bosses and reports and coworkers and clients and vendors; from everywhere. I looked back at my career and yes, I could see that. Again, I kind of write it off as idiots being idiots.

Then I came across Jordan Peterson. And while I don't agree 100% with what he says, he's got a lot of good points. I particularly enjoyed the way he describes hierarchies. For starters hierarchies are inescapable to the human condition, we are built to form our social life in hierarchical structures; and these hierarchies can be competence hierarchies or power hierarchies.

When two people meet for the very first time, they test one another to see where they rank in relation to each other in the present hierarchy: it starts with small talk, but soon escalates to testing each other. And if one comes up ahead, the other, the lower in the hierarchy will, inevitably, here and there, test the superiority of the other: The Shit Testing. If you look at it from this lens, you'll see it everywhere:

  • got a new job? Are you managing people? Your reports will "test" you from the get go. Fail the test and they will be all over you.
  • are you a teacher in a new class? your students will test you
  • post something in any reddit subs and the trolls will test you
  • hacklers at stand up comedy try to test the comedian's position of power
  • looking to rent an apartment? The landlord, tenant, and broker will all play power games and shit tests. Same if buying/selling a place
  • going for a small car repair? They'll be testing you to upsell/cross sell. Going for a cleaning at your dentist? Same thing

Shit testing is everywhere. We can't help it, chances are that we have done it ourselves without even realizing it we were doing it. We have all worked for a boss that we didn't respect (we didn't recognize their higher status in the hierarchy) and we tested them, sabotages them, played games. Same for a teacher/professor that we didn't respect.

So, stop looking at Shit Tests as something that only women do to guys, and see them for what they are: manifestations of human psychology in establishing, testing, and challenging status within a hierarchy. Dominance games!

Be aware that we all do. And with this knowledge what you want to do is to climb up the competence based hierarchies, and defent yourself from power-based herarchies. Unfortunately in a world that is often populated with incompetent people, the only games played are power-only games, that - by definition - are highly unstable.