My (27M) wife (27F) of 2 years (been together 10) drunkenly informed me about 6 weeks ago that she wanted a divorce after noticeably distancing herself from me. We have no kids, but just bought a house and would likely break even if we can even get it sold since it's a new construction with only 5 percent down. Keeping it after the separation is not an option, we bought too much house. However, we're both very successful career wise and make very good money for our area, so together we can afford it.

We've since had numerous discussions about what we're going to do, but for now have decided to settle on discernment counseling. We've had one session two weeks ago and we've continued to grow further apart since. We're still on good terms and sleep in the same bed, but the connection is gone for her. I'm still very attracted to her though because she's the most beautiful thing in the world to me. There's been no sex or even making out for about a month. I tried initiating about a week ago, it didn't go well. So we take care of ourselves in our own privacy.

We both care deeping about each other and we're both good people, but she doesn't feel the physical attraction to me anymore. I've always been about 10 or 15 pounds overweight, but I got focused back in March and I've lost that weight right around the time it blew up and am looking good these days. 6 foot 1, down to 170 with decent muscle, dress nicely, and clean up every day because that's important to her. She thought that would help, it didn't. The physical connection has been declining for probably a year or more.

We also just don't have fun like we used to, and it's not for lack of my trying to do fun things together. From our recent discussions, she believes the resentment towards me stems from the fact that she doesn't like my personality and how I present myself. I'm not a smooth talker, but I can hold a conversation. She thinks I can be awkward around new people and her new friend group she's had for about a year and a half. She also doesn't like my humor anymore. My friends find me funny, but it's often sexual inuendos or self depricating when I'm with them. Should I grow up? Probably, but it's who I am with my friends who are the same way.

She's also said that I am the perfect husband for everything I provide. I handle all of our finances, but try to keep her informed. I'm always helpful around the house and help keep our place like a house you'd see in magazines. There is nothing more either of us want out of a partner. However, the best way she put it was, "we've always been good together, but don't you want life with your partner to be great?"

Back to the question at hand, at what point do we call it and just go our separate ways? We had years of good times, but things have really tanked since shortly after our marriage when she finished grad school and we moved back to the city we graduated college from together. I know there's a lot of negatives here, but it's just one side of the story.

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/bvc80e/when_do_you_know_its_time_to_pull_the_trigger_and/