Hypergamy: For both men and women the key moment of attraction happens when the initiator creates an internal vision in their heads of the person are attracted to, a vision which they mutate/realize over the course of the relationship in a process akin to self actualization (that is indeed not necessarily compatible with the human freedom of their crush).

Women are, on the whole, more “average” than men who are nature’s “seeds thrown to the wind” so to speak - there are more male geniuses but also more male retards. Women are also more sociable than men, more self interested (the most popular type of pornography amongst women in america is lesbian) and less interested in sex, and simultaneously more open - even monkey pron can trigger bloodflow indicative of potential sexual arousal in women.

Add all these things together and many women’s internal vision has peer reception of/reaction to their imaginary relationship as a much more central feature of their imaginary relationships than in men’s internal visualizations. Naturally conflicting preferences within the group narrow down the pool of acceptable partners to a small slice of men (thus the infamous okcupid survey results on attractiveness). One could see the female attraction to deadbeats as either a way to fit in or repudiate their in group, along with simply being a kink akin to male affection for crazy.

Cock Carousel: 80% sexual marketplace dynamics, 20% hypergamy. Ironically the cc happens because avg woman has anywhere from 2 to 4x lower libido than the average man. No one would consider it a cc if the median man had as many sexual partners as the median woman. Difference in libido means women can easily find sex and indeed are much more often pursued and pressured into it, which eventually becomes normalized into most female cultures. One detects hints of hypocrisy/vestiges of religious purity culture in mgtow here, since median man has probably jacked off/orgasmed 100x more than the median woman.

Many men perceive women to be bigger hypocrites/more materialistic (e.g. see posts about church girls, etc.) however personally I would chalk these up to women’s sociability: human society is deeply and innately hypocritical/materialistic and women pick up on this and adapt to it. In my opinion, avg. woman raised by vulcans would be quite vulcanlike as long as she remained in vulcan society.

Finally I would like to finish with women are people. There is a wide distribution and variation of traits in women, just like men. However, much like a woman would get tired of superman or channing tatum, most men don’t really pine after another human at the end of the day: the possibility space of womanhood is vast and almost none of it intersects with the comparatively narrow possibility space of the male fantasy. Let’s be honest most of us probably want a gamer big tiddy goth gf who loves our hobbies and has a male level libido- while women may be more self interested (whereas men in their autism have more external concerns like sonic or trains), maybe us men are really just as into ourselves in terms of what we look for in a relationship. No homo.

Add all these differences to basic constraints imposed by distributed systems (see the CAP theorem of computer science), and it is probably in everyone’s best interest to go their own way.