A MGTOW Fable

Written by ThePenitentMan38

Once upon a time, in a far away land, existed a kingdom where men and women lived in harmony. But as in most fairy tales, the kingdom was plagued by a mysterious scourge known as The Wall.

The Wall was built of bricks 5 layers thick and of undermined length and height. It would pop up at any time of the day and at any locations, seemingly for no particular reason -- in the town square at high noon or in the thoroughways in the evening... Any woman who ran into The Wall would turn into a jug of milk and a man into a bottle of wine. The wine would age slowly into a fruity ambrosia with fine bouquet, but the milk would quickly turn sour into a sorry mess. Observant men noticed that The Wall hit mostly women 30 and above and rarely hit men, if at all.

The Wall had existed for unknown generations. While the men had resigned themselves to the fate of turning into fine wine, the women were furious at the thought of turning into sour milk. The women gathered in the town hall and decided to stage a protest at the King’s castle. Upon the women’s arrival in the castle, the wise old King quickly granted an audience to the women in the Great Hall, where he spoke: “The Wall has existed forever. It was here in my father’s reign. It was here in my father’s father’s reign. The Wall is relentless. The Wall cannot be defeated.”

But the women would have none of it. They marched in front of the King’s castle daily and chanted: “Ban The Wall! Ban The Wall!” This went on for weeks and finally the King relented. He sent one thousand men with pickaxes and swarmed The Wall when it appeared. The men swung at The Wall with all their might. This went on from sunrise to sundown but The Wall stood unscathed.

“Blast The Wall! Blast The Wall!”, the women demanded.

The King gathered up one thousand cannons and blasted The Wall with ten thousand cannon balls. This went on from sunrise to sundown but The Wall stood unscathed.

“Nuke The Wall! Nuke The Wall!”, the women bellowed.

The King was taken aback. Surely the women didn’t mean it! But the King had grown afraid of the angry women. He dusted off the Kingdom’s prized Titan II Missile, tipped with a 9-megaton bunk buster thermonuclear warhead. After he herded all his subjects into fallout shelters, he fired the missile at The Wall, and after the dust settled, only to find that The Wall stood unscathed.

And the protest continued. The King was exasperated. He pleaded with the women: “I had hit The Wall with pickaxes, blasted The Wall with cannon balls, and nuked The Wall with thermonuclear missile. Like my forefathers had said, The Wall is relentless; The Wall cannot be defeated”. By then, even the most fervent protesters had admitted that The Wall was there to stay, and the numbers of protesters dwindled. It was said that even to-date, a few most devoted women still gather every Sunday afternoon in front of the King’s castle and chant: “Ban The Wall! Ban The Wall!”…

The End.

Bless me, Father, for I have simp’d—ThePenitentMan38