Thank you for reading. What follows is a satirical thought experiment of sorts based on an Australian hellscape reality I have experienced. Imagine if the sexes were reversed?

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We live in a patriarchal society in which men have power, dominance, and privilege. Men make the rules and do so for their own benefit. This can be seen in how family violence is defined, policed, and adjudicated.

Men understand that women by their very nature are perpetrators of family violence. Accordingly, men by their very nature are victims of family violence. This understanding forms the basis of how our society deals with family violence.

When the police arrive at the scene of a domestic incident, they understand that the woman is the perpetrator and the man is the victim regardless of the context. The woman is handcuffed, arrested, and placed in the police car so a statement can be obtained from the man about what happened during the incident. If the woman committed crimes against the man such as assault or destruction of property, criminal charges are vigorously pursued. If the man assaulted the woman or destroyed her property, this is her fault, not his, as he is the victim and she is the perpetrator. He is not responsible for his actions.

The woman is taken to the police station for interrogation regarding the incident and any crimes which she is suspected of committing. She is then released under an intervention order which specifies that it is a criminal offense for her to return home or contact her male partner even if he attempts to contact her. This happens regardless of whether or not her male partner wishes for her to return home. The patriarchal state’s need to protect male victims from female perpetrators trumps whatever unique circumstances might exist in any given case.

Approximately one week later, she appears in family court in front of a male judge with expertise in dealing with female perpetrators of family violence. The judge applies the standard verdict: she is prohibited from returning home or contacting her male partner for 2 months. Failure to comply with these terms results in a heavy fine and lengthy jail sentence. She is also required to a complete a 6-month women’s anger management group. If the female perpetrator of family violence wishes to retrieve items from her home, such as clothing and toiletries, she must organise this with the police who will contact her male victim and make the necessary arrangements.

At the end of this two-month period, the woman returns to family court. At this point, the male judge with expertise in dealing with female perpetrators of family violence will determine if it is adequately safe for her male partner for her to return home, and if so under what conditions. A standard verdict is that she may return to her home but that she must not under any circumstances act in a manner that causes her male partner to feel threatened or uncomfortable. If she does so, he is to report her to the police for having violated the terms of the intervention order and she shall be suitably fined and jailed.

All of the above is true regardless of whether or not there are children involved, pets involved, the female perpetrator has a place to stay or financial means to support herself, the female perpetrator could lose her job, and so on. All that matters in the eyes of the law is the male victim’s safety and wellbeing. The patriarchy is not concerned about the extent to which the female perpetrator’s life is ruined in the process.