I am middle age but when I was in my late teens I fell in desperate love. I saw this girl and new she had to be mine. I calculated every move to have this lady as my mate. Mind you I was 19 and in love. As we started to date she played a game that is hard wired in her and I did not know the rules. I would drive an hour to her house and during the time she would take calls from past "friends". I would sit in the TV room and wait for the call to be over. I was so smitten for her I thought I was winning because I was with her and her past "boy friends" were not. As we were dating I paid for everything and made all forward advances in the relationship. As I worked the whole time and was getting myself educated she was feeling very secure in our relationship and probably thought this is a secure situation. She new that she would never have to worry about anything in her life. When we got married her parents were paying for her college education. About a couple weeks after we got married I received a phone call from her while she was at the registrars office that she needed money for college. Because I was working two full time jobs and going to school and saving I was able to stroke a $10K check immediately for her tuition at her very prestige private institution. Needless to say that set me back many years. Being 20 years old and having that money saved up I thought we were going to be fine. She got pregnant and decided that she would rather be a stay at home mom. Seeing I was still so smitten for her I thought that would be the best for our new family. I decided to continue to work and get educated while she was able to stay at home with her child. As life moved on and we got settled we had more children. She was able to stay at home with all of them. Our relationship continued the way it started. There was never any advances on her part to make the relationship good. She still does not call me or acknowledge me. She has never stood with me during difficult situations in life. She has never stood against me but she would just kind of disappear from the situation or watch me be attacked like we all do in this world. Not everything goes well all the time. She continued to slowly change me. Quit smoking. Work on marriage and being a good husband. From the inception of our relationship she has been working on me to conform to her lifestyle and what she wants. I have gone to counseling to figure out what is wrong with ME. I have been told by countless betas everywhere on how to love my wife. She has never stayed up at night trying to figure out how to pay a bill. Never once has she had to worry about the kids healthcare. Never once has she had to deal with people in the workplace. Her workplace is stay at home with children she naturally loves and has control over. She has never once pulled me aside and offered to carry a burden of any kind. She is not the disciplinarian in the house. She is always the good guy. The house is not clean. Sometimes I get dinners. There is no delegation to the kids to do chores. She does not willingly offer her body. She completely ignores my issues and turns them on me that I have problems. I am making a lot of money and her lifestyle is getting better while I am feeding the mouths of many people. I set up all the date nights. The gifts she buys me is from my work. She has never offered to get a job and I never told her not to get one. In fact I have wanted her to get a job for many years so that she can be challenged and provide a living if anything were to ever happen to me. The beta in me gets frustrated and I show my anger. I am not in control when the shit hits the fan. I yell for about 5 minuets and then disappear and wonder what the hell is wrong. Is it me I wonder? This doesn't happen often. About 2-3 times a year. She then uses these episodes of yelling as her control to prove her point that I am the problem and that she never knows what to do. During my rant she stays 100% in control and never fights back. I admire her greatly for this. As I was quietly communicating with her my issues she told me "she just wants to be my lover". She has told me how lucky I am to have her. As I look around and wonder what in hell is she providing to give me a quality life? Men of The Red Pill. I am now middle aged with awesome children that I would give anything to stay at home with. I love their company and I love watching them grow their minds. I love all the possibilities they have in life. I want to be a part of helping them achieve anything they desire. All my free time is being at home and with the family. My outside life is nil. Unfortunately I have to work to support them. If I choose to quite doing my part everything will unravel. My income continues to grow and the time I have is also growing. I do not have to work 80 hours anymore. I am still smitten for her. I love her smell, her laugh, her body and her personality. I am a prisoner to love. Love for my wife, children and what is right. I am an alpha in the world and a first class beta at home. I have never strayed from my wife nor do I have intentions. All that I want from her is a simple thank you. A little recognition as to the scope of stress I carry to give so much. Sometimes a relief of the burdens. I never seem to give enough and I need to continue working on myself all the while she has never taken responsibility of any issue in our relationship. TRP has been a great help and I thank all of you. Still learning and trying to figure out how to break this trend that has been going on for over 20 years. For length of content I have left many items out but I hope you can see the gist.